A/N: Upcoming angst


Chp 2: Realisation

Odds are odds.

Ino remembered her words, and it seemed that the odds had been high. She had failed to resolve the situation, and Ino now sat gnawing on her fingernails as she stared at the plus sign. Ino could not stop her feet from bouncing insistently while her chest slowly tightened to the point where she found it difficult to breathe. This revelation was like a wrecking ball that crashed hard through the walls of her denial, and Ino now realised that there was no escaping the light of reality.

Ino had managed to convince herself that the first test she had taken over a month ago had merely been a false positive. With confidence, Ino had repeated the statement until she believed it herself and could carry on with life as usual. Even when the treacherous signs began to appear like a haunting ghost pulling her back towards the truth, Ino still managed to explain them away to herself. She was only feeling tired because she was working too late. She was occasionally feeling nauseous because she was coming across undesirable food. Her denial grew so strong that even when Ino experienced her second missed period, she just chalked it up to stress.

Now, Ino's legs were completely numb as she finally acknowledged the truth that she had been running away from- She was pregnant. How could she have been so careless as to let this happen? Although she wasn't the only one to blame.

Ino had thought about having children one day but not yet because she wasn't ready, and they had never discussed it. Oh, no. Sai! A fresh wave of tension overtook Ino then, and she fell deeper into her panic. How would she even begin to tell Sai?

Suddenly the doorknob rattled, and Ino jumped to her feet as fright surged through her heart.

"Ino," came Sai's voice.

Ino tried to calm her nerves by rationalising that he could not come in as she had locked herself in their bathroom.

"Y-Yes," Ino managed to force out.

"You've been in there for a while," Sai continued before asking bluntly, "Did you eat something that didn't agree with you?"

"No. No," Ino answered, half thinking," I'm just changing."

Ino's mind raced a mile a minute as she tried to devise a plan to get rid of the evidence. After all, the last thing Ino wanted was for Sai to accidentally stumble upon the test.

Meanwhile, Sai heard frantic movements inside the bathroom as he stood still on the other side of the door. He had once heard that girls tended to take longer to get ready as they were more thorough about the matter.

"I won't be long," Ino said then.

Sai had learned that she meant the opposite, so It seemed that he would be going to bed alone tonight.

~ooOOoo~

With each passing week, Ino felt the burden of her secret grow to the point where it plagued her every waking minute. It happened because Ino was beginning to change physically.

"Ino."

It was that familiar voice again, and it caused Ino's vision to clear. Sai was sitting across from her with a searching gaze. His eyes shifted from her face to the untouched teacup that lay forgotten in her hands. It was only then that Ino noticed that the once warm vessel had now turned cold.

Sai leaned forward then. "You haven't been listening." Ino was about to apologise, but he spoke again. "Are you okay?"

Ino sucked in a deep breath. She just had to unburden herself; otherwise, she would go mad. "Well. Truthfully no," Ino began as she steeled herself. "I need to tell you something."

Sai sat up straighter then as he focused all his attention on her.

Ino's stomach rolled as she gripped onto the edge of the table. "I -"

Suddenly an array of loud screeches pierced through the moment and reached an octave only audible to dogs. Sai was quick to cover his ears as the sound was like an arrow to his head. The young shinobi then turned to find that three little children were wailing at the top of their lungs at the far corner of the tea shop. They seemed to be all around that prepubescent age. The two boys were fighting over a toy while the only girl cried in a passive attempt to attain the desired item.

Subconsciously Ino found herself studying Sai at that moment. There was nothing paternal about the look he was casting the children. On the contrary, he remained passive towards the situation apart from the slightest flicker of annoyance that caused his eyebrows to dip.

"I can't think of anything more unnecessary," Sai told her then.

Ino began to chew on her lower lip harshly. "What do you mean?"

"Children," Sai clarified without hesitation, "They disrupt your entire life." He then turned his attention back to her. "However, I am aware that they are needed to continue on the ways of the hidden leaf and, by extension, protect it."

There was no malice in Sai's words. He was merely vocalising his logic, and yet Ino's stomach sank. "You think that's the only reason people have children? "Ino asked in hidden dismay.

Sai furrowed his brow. "Of course. What are the other possible reasons?"

His question hung in the space between them but remained unanswered as Ino lost herself once again to her troubled thoughts. The children continued to wail, but Ino could no longer hear them.

~ooOOoo~

It was mid-afternoon, and the sun was high in the clear sky. Ino struggled to get comfortable beneath the layers of clothes that she had put on that made it even more stiflingly hot. She had made it a point to wear loose clothes and those with busy patterns to distract anyone from noticing her swelling stomach. However, Ino knew that soon this would be unrealistic because she would no longer be able to hide her pregnancy. She was running out of time to come clean as months had passed already from the moment Ino had found out to now. Ino's head then spun from the heat and stress. However, before she had a chance to sway, Sai's hand was on her elbow.

"Are you okay?" he asked.

Ino shook away her dizzy spell and nodded. "I guess I haven't been sleeping enough," she half-made up.

Normally Ino would have swooned at Sai's display of concern, but she didn't want to be near him for fear that he would find out her secret in her current state. Sai was not blind to the unexpected reaction he received, but he did not have time to comment on it as they suddenly had company.

"You're glowing," Choji told her upon arrival.

Ino could not hold her irritation in check, which was already peaking. "No. I'm not," she snapped.

It was then that Ino felt the hand that had been on her elbow move towards her back. In response, Ino jumped away as fast as she could from the contact. Then, turning to the side, she saw that Sai had moved to comfort her spontaneously but was now looking puzzled. Ino offered forced a smile then as if to say that everything was fine. However, he seemed to know that something was off between them.

Shikamaru broke the odd atmosphere that had settled by speaking up. "Choji is trying to get you to pay for dinner by complimenting you."

Ino, who was thankful for the distraction, merely nodded at Shikamaru. "He can wish. It's definitely his turn to pay," she joked to keep things light.

It worked as everyone became distracted, and after this point, Ino found time passing in a blur, for she was trying her best to act normally through the suffocation she was experiencing in the restaurant. It was even hotter than outside. Temari had joined them eventually, and she relayed a message which Ino only caught parts of. She heard 'Sakura' and 'she couldn't make it, but that was all because Ino was discreetly pressing her fingertips to her lips then. The food had arrived at the table, and the mere smell of one of the dishes was sending her stomach into rejection. Ino tried her level best to remove herself without attracting attention.

Temari, who had been teasing Choji, found herself distracted when she caught sight of Sai from the corner of her eye. Turning, Temari saw that he was facing away from their table towards the lady's room. There was a subtle frown that marred his forehead, and his eyes held an underlying frustration. It was then that Temari noticed that Ino was missing. Had they fought?

Meanwhile, inside the lady's room, Ino had locked herself in a stall and was trying not to touch anything as she was crouching in front of the toilet. She was trying to breathe past the visceral squeezing of her stomach but the dry heaving was leaving her breathless. Thankfully nothing came up, but that was more to do with the fact that she hadn't eaten all day. Ino found that she couldn't complain, though, because she had only experienced the odd sporadic bouts of nausea over the months. Eventually, when her stomach settled and Ino stopped her eyes from watering, did she exit the stall. However much to Ino's astonishment, Temari was standing by the sinks. She was eyeing up Ino through the mirror, but Ino merely smiled. She quickly washed her hands and was about to move to leave when Temari moved her fan to block off her exit.

"You're pregnant," she stated simply in such a Temari manner.

Why beat around the bush?

Ino quelled the utter dread at being found out and forced out a laugh. "Don't be r-"

"I know the signs," Temari said in a matter of fact way as she folded her arms.

Ino grew defensive. "How would you know?"

It seemed that Temari was not prepared for the question because she paused for a second. Her determined look soon softened into an embarrassed shyness. A pink tinge touched her cheeks as her eyes became momentarily downcast. Ino became silent, too, for she had never seen this side of Temari. The kunoichi from the land of wind was very much like a tornado. She was blunt, opinionated and brash in her ways. Yet now, she mimicked more of a gentle breeze.

"I know… because I am too," Temari admitted.

The revelation elicited a gasp from Ino before she lost all the breath in her lungs. Her mouth dropped open, and her eyes grew wide. Of all the ways Ino imagined this conversation with Temari going, this was not one of them.

Momentarily forgetting about her own worries, Ino genuinely smiled. "Have you told Shikamaru?"

Temari nodded, and this made Ino's smile grow. "I can't believe this."

Temari found strength in Ino's reaction, and It allowed her to ask, "Your happy, right? I mean, I know Shikamaru is important to you, and you are to him. I know I've taken most of his time away from you, and now it's only-"

Ino was quick to take Temari's hands. "Enough," she cut in, "Don't you dare think that I would ever not be happy for you and Shikamaru." However, Ino stopped short of admitting that she had been painfully jealous when Temari had first taken him away from her and that it had taken some time to adjust.

Temari let out a shaky breath. "Thank you."

What could Ino do but pull her into a hug, and they stayed that way for some time. However, once Temari composed herself, she was quick to clear her throat and move away. "Can I ask why you are hiding the fact that you are, though?" Temari asked outright.

Ino's body language became guarded once more, but Temari cut in before Ino had a chance to deny anything.

"Don't even try and deny it," she challenged before teasing, " I mean, why else would you wearing that outfit instead of Ino's trademark revealing one?"

For the first time in a while, Ino found a grin break out across her face.

"You have got me there," she conceited before she got a jibe in herself, "Well, your trademark outfit seems to have room for a baby because I couldn't even tell."

There was an answering whack to Ino's arm then, but when she met Temari's eyes, they dissolved into laughter instead. A new understanding had been born between them because they were in the same boat. It allowed Ino to confess eventually.

"I'm hiding it because I haven't told Sai yet," Ino explained.

Temari grew serious then. "Ino, he is no longer socially oblivious. He does pick up on things you know," she reminded, "And right now, he knows you're acting strange."

Ino nodded fervently. "I know. I know," she added quickly before sighing, "I just don't know how to tell him. I'm worried about how he will react."

Temari offered a sympathetic look. "I get that…If it helps, Shikamaru freaked out. It's normal."

However, Temari realised then that Ino had been pushed enough for today as Temari noticed how her gaze was beginning to cloud over and darken. This wasn't Temari's place, so she was quick to drop the conversation.

Temari then looped her arm around Ino's. "Come on. They'll think we've gone missing," Temari joked as she pulled Ino's along and in the direction of the door.

The pair, however, did not even make it to their table, as standing close on the other side of the door was Shikamaru and Sai.

Temari quickly left Ino's side and quashed Shikaramu's attempts to fuss over her as they moved towards the table where Choji was sitting alone and eating away. Ino followed suit. However, Sai was more persistent.

"Are you sure you're alright?" Sai asked before tactlessly adding, "I mean, you look bloated, but you haven't even eaten."

Ino recoiled at the sentiment. "I'm fine," came her clipped response.

~ooOOoo~

Sai was continuing to try and stifle the internal frustration that was brewing beneath his calm exterior. However, it was becoming harder to do so with each passing day as Ino had become increasingly difficult as of late. Sai couldn't understand why she had shut herself down to him. Ino was civil to everyone else but him. So why would she treat him so differently?

It was one afternoon when Sai had arrived home and spotted Ino in the living room. She was sitting in almost darkness as the light of the setting sun had all but faded away. However, it seemed that Ino had not noticed as she was lost in thought.

Sai hesitated by the open door. It had indeed been a long day for him at the academy dealing with difficult children, and the last thing he wanted was to add another burden. However, Sai was then reminded of all the times that Ino had come to his emotional aid, and he felt the sense of obligation rise up within his chest. Sai heaved a heavy sigh before finally steeling himself to deal with her. Unfortunately, it appeared that Ino was so consumed that she didn't even notice Sai's presence in the room until he joined her on the sofa. Sai leaned back while making it a point to keep an appropriate distance not to rile her up.

Ino looked up then in surprise. "You're home. Is it 6 pm already?"

Sai merely nodded and watched as Ino remained stiff.

"Have you been sitting here long?" Sai asked then innocuously.

Ino's confusion had grown. "It would appear so."

Sai found himself feeling sorry for Ino, and he tried a smile of encouragement. "You seem to be having a tough time recently."

It was then that Ino truly met his eyes. Her lips quivered slightly, and there seemed to be words on the tip of her tongue. There was a struggle behind her blue eyes.

Sai sat up then with a serious expression. "What's wrong? Is there something you want to tell me?"

The question only sent Ino further into the struggle, and Sai watched on. It seemed that whatever had risen to the surface was quickly being buried as Ino turned her attention to her lap.

"That's fine," Sai reassured, realising that he might have pushed too hard, "If there is anything, then you know where I am."

Sai sat in the resulting silence for a moment before raising to leave. However, he only half rose when a hand caught the edge of his sleeve. Sai looked down then to see that Ino was not meeting his eyes, but her fingers gripped his sleeve. He took this as a good sign because it seemed like Ino wanted him near. Sai was quick to relent, and feeling bolder; he reached out for her when he sat back down. His hand was slow to glide across Ino's cheek and for his fingers to reach into her hair. Sai held one side of Ino's face, and he watched as she closed her eyes against the sensation. Ino then let go of the breath that she didn't know she had been holding. Her shoulders even lost a bit of their tension, and Sai was warmed by the idea at least he had managed help in some small way to appease her. It was when Ino nuzzled into his touch that he felt a stirring. Sai was quick to bring his other hand up to cup her face. Ino's expression was slowly crumbling, and her head was bowed low. Sai instinctively pulled her face up towards him while he leaned in close. She would be comforted by a kiss like she usually did. It was then that Sai felt hands pushing hard against his chest and the unexpected gesture caught him off guard. He was quick to let go of Ino as if he had been burned.

Her expression of annoyance was the first thing that Sai was faced with. "Is this all that you need from me?" she asked harshly.

The surge of resounding anger surprised Sai. It came without warning and with no cause. This was Sai's first taste of outright rejection at the hands of Ino when she had shoved him away, and it felt brutal. It left a bitter taste in Sai's mouth, and it finally tipped him over the edge.

He broke and stood to his feet. "What is wrong with you?" he finally snapped with a hard edge to his voice.

Ino because utterly shocked for a moment at his response, but her emotions soon morphed to mimic Sai's anger. She bristled. "Is it so wrong? I'm just not in the mood for that right now, or could you not tell?"

Sai nearly choked on his words at her assumption. "I wasn't even thinking about that!"

Ino's scoff was like an insult, and her next words were an attack. "Please, you were so pent up back at the cabin. The one time I reject your advance and you get angry."

Sai was close to pulling out his hair. Ino was single handily driving him to madness with her purely irrational behaviour. "You know you're acting like such a hormonal woman."

Ino surged to her feet at that moment. "That is such a typical male response."

Sai pinched the bridge of his nose. "I wasn't trying to initiate anything," he sternly vocalised as he became affronted by Ino's accusation, "I was just trying to help."

Ino's hands were on her hips before a mock laugh laced her words. "Yes, helping me by easing your need."

Sai was exhausted by Ino's chaotic and high energy. He was left utterly drained. "You are not the Ino I've come to know," he finally said before moving to go, "And I don't like this version of you."

Although Sai had spoken his truth, it didn't make him feel any better. It was the sound of Ino's tears, soon as he left the room, that was too much to bear. It drove Sai out of the house, leaving her alone. They had both served only to make the situation worse.

They had never fought like this before.


To be continued