Hero Origins – Stick of Truth
Hi guys, ready for day 2? Let's see what new adventures awaits Douchebag and Friends. Hope you like it
My main language is Spanish so I'm sorry for my grammar
Yaoi. Boy x Boy. If you don't like it, don't read it
I don't own South Park or any of its characters. South Park is own by Trey Parker, Matt Stone and Comedy Central.
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Douchebag P.O.V
I slowly open my eyes, all my body is in pain. I sit down and look at myself, I'm naked but in underwear and covered in bandages, so not really naked, I look like a mummy. I look around me, this place looks familiar, I was here yesterday, I'm in Jimmy's house
What happened last night? After leaving Jimmy's house, I was walking back and… a spotlight appeared over me… in the sky? Something took me and… aliens? Yeah, aliens. I was abducted by aliens. I fought them and the spaceship stared falling and… I woke up here. I was abducted… someone took me again… I hug myself trembling, someone almost took me again…
"D-Douchebag?" I heard beside me
I look beside me and there was Jimmy, he looked worried
"A-Are you ok?" He asked and I nod "T-Thank god, I was a-afraid you w-wouldn't wake up" He said and hugged me
I would normally enjoy this, but his touch made every fiver of my body scream in pain. Realizing this he let me go
"Oh, I'm s-sorry" He said stepping back "W-What happened, how d-did you end u-up like this?"
I was hesitating to tell him, if I said the truth, he won't believe me, is too crazy of a story, but I don't want to lie to him. I told him hoping it was the best choice
"Y-You got abducted b-by aliens? The ones t-that say moo-moo?" He asked
If I remember correctly, they did speak like that. How did he know them?
"Is cool t-that you managed t-to defeat t-them, they come e-every once in a w-while, they are pretty a-obnoxious" Jimmy said like it was nothing
Is he joking? Why is he so calm?
"Y-You look surprised, s-stuff like that happens a-all the time in S-South Park, our little m-mountain town is w-weird" Jimmy said and I still couldn't believe it "H-Hey, you said t-the UFO crash, r-right? Maybe they'll cover i-it in the news"
Jimmy turn on the TV and put the local news, and he was right, they are talking about it, the reporter is a guy in a bikini and is showing the crash site… huh? Why are they talking about Taco Bell now? They are covering the accident and they are saying everything was because of the opening of a new Taco Bell. What?! The UFO is in plain sight, and the people are buying the story…
"Y-Yeah, the adults here a-are very stupid t-too" Jimmy said, I was too bewildered to even response "I w-wouldn't trust them w-with something like t-this, but is not like w-we could do a-anything about it"
I close my eyes and took a moment to calm down, too much stupid information was just dumped on me. At least the aliens are gone. I look to the window and saw it was bright outside
"What time is it?" I asked
"Emm… 5:48" Jimmy said
Is already morning, I need to go back home before my parents wake up. I tried to get up, but Jimmy stopped me
"W-What are you d-doing? You are too h-hurt to move" Jimmy said trying not to touch me
"I'm ok" I said and stand up this time, my body is still in pain and groggy, but I'll manage "My clothes" I said and blush immediately, I was still almost naked
"Mmm, they are…" Jimmy said and pointed to the couch beside us
I look at my clothes and they were near to unusable, I put them on just to feel a little better
"I need to go" I said
"A-Are you sure? Y-You can rest here a-all you want" Jimmy said
"My parents will worry" I said
"I s-see" Jimmy said "At least let m-me walk you home. Y-You ended like this b-because you came t-to help me"
I didn't want him to take the trouble, but his face said he wasn't going to take a no for an answer
"Ok" I said
"Y-Yay. L-Let me change c-clothes, I'll be b-back in a moment. D-Don't leave without m-me" He said and run upstairs
A minute later Jimmy came back wearing normal clothing, he wasn't going to play today?
"Your bard costume?" I asked
"Oh y-yeah, you weren't a-around when I told e-everyone. I g-got kick off the g-game" He said scratching the back of his head
WHAT? Why? Oh no… Was it because we won yesterday?
"Jimmy, I…" I tried to say but he stopped me
"D-Don't blame yourself, it w-was because our leaders a-are assholes and c-can't take a loss" He said "A-Are you going to p-play again today?"
"I think so" I said
"Y-You should rest t-today"
"I'm stronger that I look" I said smiling
"Mmm… t-then let me h-help you, I have n-nothing better to d-do"
"Can you do that?"
"K-Kyle only told m-me not to c-come back, so I c-can do what e-ever I want"
"Ok, thanks" I said blushing and Jimmy smile
Jimmy got his costume on and we walked towards home, on the way I saw the aftermath of the UFO crashing, there was flaming debris everywhere, but luckily nothing was on fire. We reach my house and told Jimmy to wait outside, if my parents realize I didn't comeback yesterday, they'll go insane. I enter and the house was silent, great, I quickly went to my room and change into my warrior costume, I tried to take off the bandages, but it was painful so I leave them on, also they look cool with the costume. I went to the bathroom and grabbed some painkillers from the first aid kit. I went to the kitchen and made some quick sandwiches for me and Jimmy to eat, I was going to grab some juice boxes when mom entre the kitchen
"Hey sweetheart, good morning" She said "You waked up early, are you going to play with your friends today?" She said and I didn't answer "Alright hon, have fun"
I grabbed the sandwiches and the juices and walk away, luckily she thought he bandages were part of my costume, I went outside and Jimmy was sitting on the entry stairs
"W-Welcome back" He said and I gave him his food "T-This is for me?"
"You haven't had breakfast, right?" I said in a low voice
"T-Thanks" He said, and we started eating
I made the sandwiches as fast as I could, I hope he likes it
"A-Are you feeling b-better?" He said and I nod "G-Great" He smiled
I feel great, I like Jimmy, he is a nice guy and he took care of me all night, I'm really happy right now, but as always, I can't last forever
"Douchebag, Douchebag!" I heard from afar
God Dammit, Cartman was running toward us, he stopped in front of us to recover his breath
"Oh my god, there was an earthquake and there was burning in my yard" Cartman said "You don't understand, the elves… They took the Stick!"
What?!
"W-What?!" Jimmy said "N-No way"
"Yes way, the cheating elves took the Stick during the night, they knew is against the rules and they did it anyway" Cartman said and the look at Jimmy "And what are you doing here? Should you be with your cheating friends, Bard"
"W-What I'm doing here is n-none of your business, Cartman" Jimmy said "B-Besides, I'm no longer o-on the e-elves team"
"Huh, so you are joining the humans?" Cartman said
"N-No, I'm on Douchebag's s-side, I'll only s-serve him" Jimmy said
"So, you are basically on our side" Cartman said, I threw a snowball at him and then flipped him off "Hey!" He yelled angrily as Jimmy laugh
"Hey guys, what's going on here?" Butters arrived
"Ugh, whatever" Cartman said "We are going to lay waste to the entire elven kingdom for cheating"
"I t-told you, they wouldn't c-cheat like that" Jimmy said
"Shut up Bard!" Cartman yelled, I threw another snowball at him and he growl at me "I don't care. Douchebag, I'm sending you on a mission"
"What kind of mission?" Butters asked
"Because of your incredible power to make friends…" Cartman said
My power…
"… I want you to recruit a whole new fraction to Kupa Keep" He said and gave me a letter "Find the goth kids and give them this letter, they will aid us to get back the Stick and destroy those assholes elves once and for all. Butter go with them"
"Yes sir" Butter said and Cartman left "Douchebag, are you ok?"
I hate that fuck nugget, every time I talk to him he makes me feel awful
"A-Are you still t-tired?" Jimmy asked me
I look up to see my friends worried faces, at least I feel I can count on them
"I'm fine, thanks" I said, smile and they look relieved
"By the way Jimmy, what are you doing here?" Butters asked
"D-Douche is my lord n-now" Jimmy said
"What? No" I said
"W-Why not?" Jimmy said
"Equal" I said
"Y-You want us t-to be equal? I don't m-mind serving you" Jimmy said, and I shook my head "Hehe, a-alright"
"You too Butters" I said
"Me too, well of course, we are all friends, right?" Butter said and I nod
Friends…
"We need to get the goth kids, right?" Butter said
"Is e-early, but they s-should be at the s-school by now" Jimmy said
At school? In the news they said they were going to cancel school for a few days because of the 'new taco bell', why would they be at school?
"T-The goth kids like t-to loiter in the a-alley by school, they a-are always there" Jimmy said, and I nod
"Let's go" Butter said, and we started walking
We walked for a few minutes until we reached the school, I didn't think about it yesterday, but after everything calm down, I'm going to be attending this school. Now that I think about it, how old is everyone? We all look to be around the same age, are we going to be in the same group? I hope so
Butters point to a wire fence by the school, and they there are, 3 boys and a girl, all dress in black and smoking, two of them look around our age, one looks older and the last one looks very young
"They look more like emo" I said
"Don't" Butters said quickly
"D-Don't say that in f-front of them" Jimmy said terrified
Ok… they do seem dangerous. We walk to them and Butters greet them
"You are that kid the vampires converted" The girl said
"It's a long story" Butter said
"And you are that cool stutter kid. Hello cool stutter kid" The older one said
"H-Hi…" Jimmy said
"Who is this conformist?" The one our age said looking at me
"Oh, I'll present you" Butter said "Goth kids, this is Douchebag, he moved in yesterday"
"He is the new kid we heard about" The girl said
"And Douchebag, this are the goth kids, the tall one is called Michael, the one with red hair is Pete, the girl is Henrietta and the small one is Firkle" Butters said
"I can feel the despair in your soul" Firkle said slowly
He is adorable
"Now that we are done with that, go away, this is a nonconformist zone" Michael said
What does he mean by conformist? I really don't care. I gave him the letter
"What's this?" Michael said and start reading the letter "Join the kingdom of Kupa Keep to battle the wicked elves. All recruits welcome"
"Cartman…" Jimmy sigh
"Sorry Frodo, we don't play Dungeon and Douchebags" Michael said throwing the letter away
"Yeah, beat it, New Kid" Pete said
It doesn't look like they are willing to help…
"Aw come, let's do it. We never do anything" Firkle said
Huh. I didn't expect someone actually wanted to play
"We can't do what this kid asked us to do, he is a conformist!" Michael said "Just look at his clothes and his hair"
I have a helmet, you can't see my hair…
"Tell you what, new kid. Get the right clothes, some cigarettes and some coffee and then talk to us again" Pete said
"If you want to prove you aren't a conformist then you need to look like we do. Then maybe we'll consider hanging out with you" Michael said
That was one of the most stupid things I ever heard… but ok, I'll do it. We exit the alley
"So, in order to recruit them, we need goth clothes, cigarettes and coffee" Butter said "Where are we going to get all that?"
"I k-know where to f-find clothes" Jimmy said "T-There is a guy w-who sells them near T-Tweek's coffee"
"Nice and we can get coffee there too" Butter said
"NO!" I yelled panicking
"What? Why not?" Butters asked
"Aahh… I'm allergic to the secret ingredient" I lied
"Oh darn it, we'll need to get it from somewhere else" Butter said
"H-Hey" Jimmy whispered to me "You k-know about the s-secret ingredient?" He said and I nod "Let's t-talk later"
"Ok" I whispered back
"I k-know how to b-brew coffee, we can g-get it in my house" Jimmy said
"Great, that just leaves the cigarettes" Butters said
"T-That's going to get c-complicated" Jimmy said
"Who do we know that smokes?" Butters asked
"A-And is willing to s-share his cigarettes?" Jimmy said
"Towelie!" Jimmy and Butter yelled together
Who?
"He is somewhat of a friend to us" Butter said
"A-And works at a s-summer camp I g-go to" Jimmy said
Are these guys friends with druggie?
"A-Alright, let's go" Jimmy said
"Wait" Butter said "Isn't brewing coffee going to take a while?"
"A f-few minutes, but not m-much" Jimmy said "W-Why?"
"I'll go get the clothes and the cigarettes while you guys brew it" Butter said
"It isn't g-going to take t-that long" Jimmy said
"Is ok, besides, I think Douche needs to rest, he looks tired" Butters said
God damnit, I'm not tired, everyone should stop saying that. I only fought aliens all night and fell from a spaceship while on fire… I'm fine…
"A-Alright, we'll wait for y-you at my house" Jimmy said
"Ok, see ya" Butter said and ran away
"L-Let's go then" Jimmy said and I nod
Jimmy's house was only a minute from school, so it didn't take us long, we enter and I stop to appreciate how well it look without being destroyed
"H-Hey, can you help me g-get some stuff" Jimmy asked and I nod
We enter the kitchen and start with the coffee
"S-So, how did y-you know about t-the Tweak's secret ingredient?" Jimmy asked
"He asked us to get it yesterday" I said
"Y-You help him on h-his work, huh" Jimmy said
"I didn't expect them to put in on the coffee" I said "I'm sorry…"
"Is f-fine, you d-didn't know" Jimmy said "We have b-been trying to stop T-Tweek of drinking h-his parent's coffee. That's w-why everyone in our g-group knows how t-to brew coffee"
"Really?" I said
"Y-Yeah. We also want h-him to stop d-drinking coffee entirely, b-but we have to d-do it one step a-at a time"
"I see"
Is cool to see how close Jimmy and his friends are, unlike Cartman and his friends, who apparently are at each other's throats all the time. The coffee was ready, and Jimmy pour it on a thermo, now we have to wait for Butters to return
"S-So, what do you w-want to do w-while we wait?" Jimmy asked
"Anything if fine"
We walked back to the living room when we heard a knock on the door. It was too soon for Butter to comeback, who could it be? We opened the door and we were greeted by swords, lances and bows pointing directly at us, outside there was an army of elves waiting for us
"The elven king want's an audience with you new kid" A blond elf said, he looked stronger and had better armor than everyone else
"W-What's the meaning o-of this?" Jimmy asked
"The banished bard" The elf said "This has nothing to do with you, stay out of this"
I draw my sword and slash/poke the elf down the entry stairs and was caught by his army. I flipped him off and close the door
"D-Don't you want t-to hear them?" Jimmy said
"I don't care, besides, they were mean to you" I said
"It's f-fine, I'm over it, I like working w-with you" Jimmy said
"R-Really? Me too" I said overjoyed as Jimmy smiled
We heard another knock on the door, we opened it and saw the same blond elf, but now he looked furious
"The elven king sends us to get you, there is no way you can get awa…" He tried to say, but I close the door on his face
"Should we watch TV?" I said
"Hehe, s-sure" Jimmy said
We heard the door again and I sighed, this guy is not giving up, looks like there is only one option
"Should we beat them?" I asked
"D-Don't you think y-you are too w-weak right n-now to beat this m-many?" Jimmy said "Also, w-we don't know when B-Butters is coming back"
"True"
"W-We should go with t-them, what's t-the worse that c-could happen?"
Yeah, I think that's the easiest option
"Ok…" I said and open the door one more time
"W-We'll go with you" Jimmy said
"We only want the new kid, you are not wel…" He tried to say, and I close the door again
"Hehe, m-maybe you are b-being a little b-bit rude" Jimmy said
"Not really" I said, the elf knocked again, and I open the door
"Ok, he can come" The elf said giving up and I smile victorious
We walk towards the elven kingdom, I hope this goes quickly, we still need to reunite with Butters. The elven kingdom was in Kyle's house, it was the last house before the train tracks and Kenny's. We entered his house, I greeted Kyle's brother who looks like a cool dude and we entered the elven kingdom. This place is better than Kupa Keep in every sense, it looks like an actual kingdom, with houses and life, unlike Cartman's that's only his castle
We walk towards the middle of the place, where a kid with a green hat and a crown made of twigs and another one with a cool blue hat, wait for us. These should be Kyle and Stan
"Welcome to the elven kingdom, new kid" He said looking at me "And why are you here?" He said looking at Jimmy
I move between the two of us, I wasn't going to let him disrespect Jimmy
"It's o-ok Douche, thanks" Jimmy said
"So, you manage to befriend the new kid, Bard" Kyle said "Good for you"
"W-What do you want w-with him?" Jimmy said
"It's not of your business" Kyle said "Guards kick him out"
Elves started to surround Jimmy, I pulled my sword and slash the air preventively for them to stop, I could see the terror of some of the kids I beat yesterday. Jimmy pulled his crossbow and aim at Kyle
"If y-you don't have a-anything interesting to s-say, we are l-leaving" Jimmy said
Kyle was irritated, but calmed down quickly
"I see, then I'll go straight to the point. Join us new kid" Kyle said "Cartman is only using you"
Oh, I know he is, like he is also using everyone else. I don't like Cartman, but I don't like this guy either
"H-Hey, Douchebag" Jimmy whisper to me "K-Kyle is usually a n-nice guy, he j-just gets too obsessed t-trying to beat Cartman"
Mmm, I see, but still I don't want to join him
"What did Cartman told you? That we stole the Stick? Lies. He himself hide the Stick, which is against the rules, in order to get everyone on his side" Kyle said
"H-How did you k-know that?" Jimmy said
"We know were it is" Stan said for the first time "Is inside his desk at school"
"We also know he ask you to get the goth kids in order to invade us. Don't do it, don't help that cheater. Get the goths but bring them here and together we'll destroy the humans" Kyle said
I sigh, the audacity of this kid is tiresome. Yesterday he kicked out Jimmy because he though Jimmy betrayed him and now, he wants me to betray Butters and the rest
"If you join us, we'll let Jimmy return to the kingdom like a hero" Kyle said proudly
Ok, that's it. I'm done with this shit. I look at Jimmy and signal him we are leaving
"O-Oh, ok" Jimmy said, and we started walking to the exit
"Think about it, new kid" Kyle said, but before leaving I look back at him and flipped him off, he yelled angrily, but we kept walking
Kyle, Cartman, they are the same, no worth fighting for. I know what I want to do, but I don't want to impose myself on Jimmy
"Hey Jimmy" I said walking back to Jimmy's house "What do you want to do?"
"M-Me? About what?" Jimmy said
"Do you want to return to Kyle?"
"N-Not really, what I w-want is to be with y-you, if you want to g-go with Kyle, I'll follow y-you"
"I don't want you to serve me, I…" I tried to say
"Y-You want us to b-be friends, right?" Jimmy said smiling "I a-also want to be together because w-we want. I got y-your back"
"Jimmy…" I said smiling
"W-What do you w-want to do?"
"Mmm… I'll tell you but first I want to get Butters"
End of Chapter 4
I did it, it took me a while to write the end, is hard to write Douchebag when I need him to have a conversation with people he doesn't trust and doesn't want to talk to. But I'm happy with the result :3
Hope you liked it and see you next time :3
