AN: This jumped into my head while I was working on the actual new chapter, and was done in like 15 minutes. It's supposed to be realistic. It's not terribly realistic. Enjoy I guess.
Possibilities
What IF 4: Bullets and Butterfly Wings
She is lost at ten.
She's enlisted at eleven and kills a man a month later, the first of many.
She's seen more countries at twelve then most do by fifty, and lost count of the dead.
She dies at thirteen and is reborn the same day.
She's attacked at fourteen, not as a soldier but as a woman. Her purity is saved, her attacker isn't.
The pack is slain at fifteen, and she is left to roam alone.
She's enlisted again at sixteen, this time as a student and as a sister.
She doesn't know which is worse: the battlefield, or the world that is protected from it. Her classmates are children, a privilege long forgotten by her. They shy away from her ice, afraid of the wolf in their midst.
A shove, a bump. An attack. He goes through her desk, her sister's voice all that saves his life.
He comes back the next day, waits for her before class to apologise. She nods and walks away.
He talks to her the next morning, and the next, and the next, and the next. His smile is sweet and innocent.
He tries to show her what she's been fighting for, and she refuses. There's too many people, too much noise, too much chaos. She could be attacked at any time, from any angle.
He understands, and they play cards with the pale girl and her servant. Her tell is a glancing at him whenever she has a bad hand, or so says the gambler.
She dislikes sports the most, as she's expected to run with no objective. But she is fast, and both teams want her for that ability if nothing else.
She runs and passes, runs and shoots. Runs, and a helicopter comes overhead. And she's running again, through towns and jungle and desert, watching hands that are not her own leave dead men behind her.
They don't know where she was hiding the pistol, but they drop to the ground as she fires upon the sky in terror.
They take away her guns. She's okay with that.
He doesn't want to know what happened, but he wants her to talk to someone, and hands her a card. Another soldier in her position, who can help where he can't.
She visits, sits down to compare and confirm. For once, the outside world reflects her own.
She returns to class so she can apologise. But they have left her behind now, all but him.
She struggles with Japanese, and he offers to teach. Her heart kicks in a strange way when he leans over to show her the process of an answer.
Her sister laughs at her when she worries but her health, tells her to stick with him. Claims the cure for PTSD is a dose of vitamin D. She is unimpressed by Wikipedia's view on the subject, and refuses to explain the joke. The doctor shares a similar, less crude view, and offers to have him sit in with them. She refuses. She wants to keep him away from her world.
Her heart acts up again when he talks to the singer, twisting more painfully this time. The feeling hardens when he invites her to some social event, claiming that it's supposed to be a quiet affair. He's naïve. There is no quiet in the class or even the school, and she knows where she's not wanted. They pretend to ignore the sighs of relief.
She's kept awake that night not by phantom gunfire but by ghosts dancing in her room, the sweet siren crooning him into a deathly embrace. She blames the couple she saw in her sister's movie, the actor that looked just like him.
She stays away from him, even as it burns deeply. It's for the best. They should be separate. She can't live in his world, and she doesn't want him near hers.
She lasts four days before a trap set by her sister leaves them locked in a classroom together. Even with the windows open, she can't breathe. He's too close, and her heart hurts, and when he tries to call the doctor he's away. Wherever she looks, her attacker follows, slipping into view even though he's been dead for years.
She tries to jump out the window only for him to wrap his arms around her, and is put through another table for his troubles.
Her stone mask breaks, and demands to know why.
Why he puts up with her. Why he can't turn away like everyone else. Why he's resurrected humanity she discarded so long ago. By the time her doctor calls back Ikusaba has died and Mukuro is in the classroom, still lost, still scared and still crying, clinging to her supporting pillar as though the past three years never happened.
Her sister unlocks the door, unsure whether to be pleased or not. They walk to the office, and with the dam broken she confesses to both of them, bares the blackened pit of her soul. She expects them to leave without her. Her sister opens her arms for a hug instead, allowing her to make first contact so the memories don't attack. He doesn't expect anything from her, but receives a hug regardless.
They walk home together, and his hand is wonderfully warm in her own.
