The whole rest of the day, Pacifica was silent and passive aggressive—slamming drawers, ignoring him, leaving the room when he entered—then night finally fell and bedtime drew near. She was upstairs showering and Dipper acted fast. In the twenty minutes he had, he plucked the petals of three roses and scattered them over their bedsheets. He then lit a scented candle and a handful of tea lights, and poured two glasses of champagne. A couple of spritzes of cologne to top it all off and the stage was set. The remaining rose he held behind his back until his wife entered the room.
Pacifica's eyes widened.
"Surprise, honey!" he said, voice filled with hope and grin with nerves.
She looked unsure. As if deciding whether or not she thought of this as adequate redemption. Dipper extended his present to her, hoping to tilt the scale in his favour. Pacifica eyed the rose without a word. After a moment shifting her eyes between the rose and Dipper, she unraveled her hair from the saturated towel atop her head and crawled into bed, throwing petals onto the floor with the wave of the bedsheets.
Dipper's heart sank. He pinched the bridge of his nose and threw the intact rose onto the vanity, "Look, I'm trying to be romantic here."
"Go be romantic with your triangle thing, that's where you'd rather be anyway," she retorted without sitting up to look at him. Dipper inhaled sharply and bit his tongue. With the way she way she was acting, he certainly would now. But he resigned and climbed into bed with his wife.
"I'm doing the best I can. I worked really hard on that project to be able to afford the life you and Atlantica deserve. I just wanted some insurance that I wouldn't fail."
"And yet here you are, still a loser."
"Come on, Pacifica, don't go to bed upset." Dipper leaned in, arms on either side of her, and gently placed a string of kisses along her pale neck. "I don't want you to leave home tomorrow resenting me." His fingers flossed through her silken hair and he went in for another throat kiss before she shoved him away.
"No. I don't want to make up with you right now, let alone make love. Just leave me alone, Dipper. I'm going to bed."
Ouch. Dipper pulled away and sighed, tucking himself under the covers and rolling over to face away from her.
The awkward nighttime silence between them lasted for almost half an hour before Pacifica eventually fell asleep first. As Dipper lie awake staring at the ceiling, his heart ached and longed to yearned to feel love. In more ways than one. Every now and then he would glance over at the woman lying next to him and reminisce of the days following Atlantica's birth. Just him and her and their daughter, reveling in eachother's existence, in love. So warm, so whole.
But aboard the same train of thought, no matter how much he tried to purge the thoughts from his mind, he couldn't stop envisioning Bill lying next to him. The glow of the candles around her blanketed form reminded him of the way his demonic aura radiated around him. He thought again of his alternate timeline self and of his alternate offspring, but mostly of his alternate spouse. The razored strings of longing pulled at his heart as he fought to relinquish their image. His breath grew heavy, soft sobs began forming until he caught himself and took a cleansing breath.
Dipper shut his eyes and forced himself to think only of school before finally drifting off to sleep. His dreams however, were no escape. He was plunged yet again into his heart's deepest desires.
...
Roughly two hours later, Dipper woke up in a sweat. Short of breath and dazed, a moment or two passed before he noticed his incredibly inconvenient erection. His memories, mostly lapsed, depicted scraps of erotic encounters with his unofficial partner in crime, Bill. Kissing him, licking his edges, pinching his vertexes, Bill's fingers slipping inside him. Upon recalling them his cock twitched, sending a volt of guilty desire to his heart. The urgent need to be out of that bed and out of that room, away from Pacifica, drug him into the bathroom like a sleep-deprived zombie. Mabel's loud snoring from downstairs echoed through the hallways.
He didn't turn on the light. Instead, the nightlight they had plugged into the wall illuminated his tired eyes as he stared into the mirror at his vexed image. The world felt so heavy on his shoulders; between all the things real life demanded of him—his daughter, his job, school, family—he now faced a harrowing new reality: He, Dipper Pines, was still madly in love with Bill Cipher. Of course, he'd known this for a while. Never really forgot it, honestly. But despite the little slip ups, like the kiss and the undeniably sexual touching, he tried so, so very hard to resist him, yet it was useless. As if on autopilot, his hand moved to caress his aching member. Just barely, his fingers grazed it and a wave of relief and distress nearly drowned him. A few more times he touched it with the same result before placing his hand back onto the counter upon which he was bracing himself.
He hung his head, staring down at his prominent erection and swore at Bill's name. That damned demon. He probably made him dream it! Well, maybe or maybe not. After all, his before-bed thoughts likely could have prompted it. But it honestly didn't matter because that shred of hope is all Dipper had left of his resolve and he was going to cling to it, for Mabel, for Pacifica, for Atlantica, and for himself. Bill was toxic—a force that would only drain his life away little by little if he let him. Dipper was not his counterpart, he could not love Bill and could not have children with Bill and could not build a life with Bill. With each rampant thought, the young man inhaled and exhaled rapidly until tears streamed down his face like waterfalls. He ran his fingers through his chestnut hair and slid down against the bathroom wall.
With time, eventually he was able to gather himself together and will down his hardness. It took a few moments longer yet to return to his bedroom, where he would then sleep like a stone until sunrise.
...
When Dipper awoke, the bed was empty. Muffled chattering rose up from the floorboards as Mabel and Pacifica ate breakfast without him. Somewhat downcast, he glanced over to the clock to see that he had slept in and likely was going to be late to class this morning. With a sleepy groan, he peeled himself from the warm mattress and stumbled toward the armoir.
Downstairs, the girls bustled around the kitchen with enthusiasm. They were barely eating their breakfast amid all the game-planning they were doing. Dipper greeted them both.
Neither girl acknowledged he'd even said anything. They simply continued their strategic chatting and packed up their equipment. Pacifica loaned Mabel her spare pink diamond tennis bracelet to match their outfits, and Mabel did Pacifica's hair up in a french braid to match her own. They gushed and flailed between sips of their gourmet coffee.
He resigned not to say anything again. Sighing, he then retrieved a lone, cold waffle from the serving plate on the counter and sat down to eat silently at the table, alone. He stared down at his plate and ate without a word as the girls stretched in preparation for their long drive. And when he was done, he left the house without saying or receiving a goodbye.
The walk to school was quiet. An overcast day foretold of rain later that evening. The birds were all mute, the neighborhood in repose. Hardly any cars passed him on his way. And when he arrived at the campus, not a single student roamed the sidewalks. They were all in class or otherwise indoors for fear of rain. Dipper wandered into class and took a seat. No one said a word to him, not even the professor missed a beat in her lesson. It was as if the world rendered him invisible to all.
He sat with his head in his hand and stared blankly into space. Words beat against his eardrums in a monotonous rhythm. His eyelids grew heavy as the rain began to pour and cascade down the university windows. He managed all of about fifteen minutes before finally falling asleep at his desk.
"It took you long enough!" Bill's radiant voice beamed. Dipper jerked upwards, meeting the demon's gaze, and shrieked. "Relax, Pines, it's just me! Your loveable, faithful companion, Bill Cipher! Boy, you sure resisted my sleep spell like no tomorrow."
"Oh, Bill. Listen, I don't know if I should be talking to you right now. I don't want to miss class after—"
"After you failed your presentation?" Bill cut in. Dipper bit his tongue and rubbed the back of his neck.
"You saw, huh?"
"Always watching, Pine Tree. And those girls of yours don't seem too happy about it either."
Dipper sunk down into his chair and avoided Bill's stare. The demon alighted on his desk and curled his tiny hand under Dipper's chin, pulling his attention back to him.
"Dipper, I'm sorry."
"Huh?" Dipper said, shocked by the sudden change in Bill's demeanor.
"You were counting on me for that project of yours and I let you down." Bill hovered again just above Dipper's desk and gave a sympathetic expression. "What's worse is that I turned your family against you by doing so and now you'll have to work even harder to regain their trust."
"I..." Dipper felt at a loss for words. His heart fluttered as the strings of adoration pulled him under Bill's spell. "I mean..."
"I want to make it up to you. I can't fix what I've done, but I can at least give you something worth your time. What say you and me have a little fun tonight since your girls will be out of town? No one to shame you, no important projects to do, no school the next day—just Bill and Pine Tree." Bill smiled wide with his eye and raised his arms into the air enthusiastically. Dipper's chest felt tight. Words clung to his throat like glue. His pupils dilated and twinkled. He sucked in a breath, bit his lip, then eventually shook his head.
"I'd love to but I have to watch Atlantica. I can't be going on wild adventures with no one to take care of her."
"No wild adventures. We'll stay right in your house. The furthest you'll be from the meatball is like ten feet or something."
"Well..." Dipper held his breath a beat. His heart screamed to him, begging him to say yes. And with all he's been through lately, he could use a friend when nobody else would be. "Okay," he finally said. Bill burst into confetti which then turned into a dozen or so smaller Bills that scattered around gleefully shouting 'hurray!' "As long as we don't leave the house, alright?" The Bills reunited into one form again and took hold of Dipper's hand.
"It's a deal! You have my word." Bill unzipped the thin air, briefly revealing a window into the nightmare realm, "Oh, and thanks for calling me an 'otherworldly force,' kiddo! Really made my millennium!" Bill blushed pink and briefly glittered? Dipper couldn't help cracking an enamored smile. Bill gave the young man finger guns before disappearing into his zipper portal. After a short delay, one tiny black hand popped back out and snapped its fingers.
Dipper jerked awake in his seat, earning a few disapproving looks from his classmates. The professor didn't seem to notice, or otherwise care, that he'd even dozed off. He rubbed the sleepiness out of his eyes and shook his head, straightening his ruffled hair.
The rest of class went rather smoothly. After Bill's affectionate little gesture, Dipper was elated. The morale boost certainly affected his productivity. After that morning's walk to school, his walk home and drive to work seemed next to ethereal. Work, likewise, went swimmingly. Before he knew it, the day was coming to an end and he found himself driving home and delightedly tapping his fingers along his steering wheel to his favourite jazz station. He hadn't even noticed his eager grinning until he caught his reflection in the rear view mirror, where he promptly rubbed a self-conscious hand along the back of his neck and downshifted to a camouflage smile despite there being nobody else around.
When he arrived into his driveway, he practically skipped to the front door. Once inside, he dropped his backpack at his feet and kicked off his shoes, additionally peeling off his socks, before trotting into the kitchen.
On the island counter, a golden tea set steamed. As though it'd been there all his life, he knew immediately what it was. The giant eyeball design on the side probably alluded to it as well. He poured himself a cup of the celestial liquid and sat down at the table. He stared down, admiring the twinkling of the miniverse in his teacup and thought of Bill. With three long, fulfilling swallows of the beverage, Bill began to flicker into existence. His projection hovered just before Dipper at the dining table, hands on his 'hips.' Once Dipper had finished the cup, he set it down and smiled at the demon.
"So, how was your day?" said Bill in the most domestic way.
"Good, following your visit," Dipper replied, pouring himself another cup of energy tea. Bill touched his hands to his face and smiled.
"Aww, Pine Tree! How sweet!"
"I sure could have used your tea this morning," the young man chuckled.
"Not sleeping with Llama?" Dipper just about choked on his drink. Flashbacks to his failed romantic gesture rattled him.
"Wh-what?" he sputtered through coughs. Bill feigned ignorance.
"If you're not sleeping with her," he said with a hand curled against his imaginary chin, "then where are you sleeping at night?" Dipper caught his breath and exhaled sharply.
"Please choose your words more carefully," he laughed nervously.
"Oh, I meant what I asked." Dipper paled. He and the demon stared at each other briefly before Bill shrugged. "So are you sleeping in your study or what?" Behind Bill's eye was a shit-eating grin.
"Let's, uh, let's move on." With the brandish of his hand, Bill gestured for Dipper to go on.
"As you wish," he added.
"So what did you wanna give me, anyway?" Dipper asked.
"The gift of my presence," Bill answered in an instant, polishing his make-believe fingernails on his bricks. Dipper cracked up.
"Oh no, I've been cursed!" the young man joked back. The genuine smile Bill returned warmed his tired heart. "But seriously though, since you're offering me such an extravagant gift, maybe we could play some D and D and More D?"
"I intend to get all the 'D' I can handle this weekend, Pines!" Bill smirked and raised his brow. Dipper was oblivious.
"Ha ha, yes!" The young man nearly knocked his seat over as he stood up from the table. He downed the rest of his teacup and grabbed Bill's hand rather roughly in his excitement. Bill's eye widened and he held on tight to his top hat as Dipper rushed him upstairs lest it be left behind.
The pair burst into the attic, and Dipper immediately rifled through his belongings to pull out the game board and all its accessories. Bill made a rattling noise and a cartoonistic dizzy face, producing a halo of tiny chirping birds for dramatic effect despite the fact Dipper was paying no attention. After unloading everything at his feet, Dipper took Bill's hand once more and knelt down onto the wooden floors of his small sanctuary. Remaining hand-in-hand with Bill, he began setting up the board.
"Better luck defeating me this time, Pine Tree. Let's hope your skills are up to par!"
Dipper gave Bill a dirty look, "That was terrible. Never speak to me again."
Bill refrained from making a savage remark at the expense of his companion. Instead he laughed and settled down into the armchair he spawned underneath himself. They played for hours, the same way they did last time. The sky outside grew dark and starry, but before they could finish, Atlantica's shrill crying demanded Dipper's attention.
"Uh oh, the baby's crying. Gotta go take care of that." He stood up and trotted over to the ladder, when suddenly Bill protested.
"Whoa whoa, you can't leave now! We're almost to the part where I harness the power of the Nth dimension and orchestrate total annihilation of mortal kind!"
"I've already seen your attempt at apocalypses." Bill huffed. "Just come with, I'll probably be a little while." He gestured for Bill to follow. The demon was momentarily hesitant but eventually tagged along.
The instant Dipper stepped foot into the nursery, the problem at hand became clear. He clapped a hand over his nose. Call it that parent in-stink-t. Bill, lacking a sense of smell and thereby unaffected by the odor, floated in without a clue.
"So why is it screeching this time?" he asked.
Instead of a verbal response, Dipper lifted his child from her cradle and carried her over to the changing table. With all of the tools he'd need to tame the beast, the young man held his breath and released the infant from her polycotton prison. As if right on cue, a stream of yellow fired at him. But Dipper, having faced this creature's plights before, was prepared. With ninja-like reflexes and the help of rubber gloves, he called to the field his trusty changing cloth. It used protect, and was super effective. Atlantica's attack missed. Then at his first available opening, he swapped out of defense mode for the main battle phase—fresh, clean diaper—and wrangled the squirming foe into it. At last, she was defeated.
When Dipper turned around, Atlantica in his arms, Bill looked horrified.
"That was the most diabolical thing I've ever witnessed." Dipper let out a full-bellied laugh, prompting his daughter to giggle as well. She smiled at her father, who smiled back at her, then glanced around the room. The moment her eyes fell on Bill, the infant paled. However, unlike per usual, she didn't scream or cry. Atlantica stared dead into Bill's eye and practically stopped breathing. At first, Bill stared hauntingly back, unmoving, unyielding, then suddenly spawned a party popper and fired it. The baby gasped at the sound, then giggled at the descending strips of confetti. The demon then smiled. Easily amused.
"Hey, you made her laugh!" Dipper exclaimed. He extended his daughter toward Bill. "Do you wanna try holding her?"
"Oh no, absolutely not," Bill recoiled. "I don't know anything about human larvae. Who knows, I could touch it and its skin might reverse inside-out? We should at least wait until it's pubescent years for that."
Dipper shook his head and dismissed Bill's comment.
"Come on, let's go finish our game."
...
For a brief moment, in this fractured time, star-crossed lovers eclipsed with another dimension and became one. For a night and two days, Bill Cipher and Dipper Pines raised a baby together. They fed and changed her, cradled her, played with her, and Bill had been especially proficient at entertaining the small child. Each time she glanced at him, she began to sob. But Bill would quickly preform magic for her amusement and the child would perk right up in his presence. It didn't entirely stop her from weeping when he drew close to her, but the quick fix maintained her contentment in most scenarios.
In the times that she slept, while Dipper did not, the faux couple studied mathematics, physics, Latin, and paranormal sciences. They watched TV, played D & D & More D, cooked, tidied, practiced dark magic, and cuddled. Dipper told himself this was all normal, the same as having a human companion over for company. He would do this with anyone who helped him babysit. Right? Of course he was kidding himself, but with the girls and their subsequent nagging gone, he could cut himself some slack. For just this one weekend.
In the evening of the second day, Dipper began to grow weary. He'd been drinking energy tea from the moment he got home the previous evening after having not slept much the night before that. Aside from the roughly three to four hours he got that night, he'd been awake for almost three days.
The young man looked at the tea set on the coffee table from his position on the sofa and reached for another drink. He deemed it his last for now. Too much would fry his brain and probably also his daughter.
Thick clouds began rolling in as the sun descended from the treetops to the horizon. Bill and Dipper took their—wait no, Dipper's daughter up to bed. Dismissing the slip up of his thoughts, he tucked the infant into her crib and gave her a kiss on the head. Something washed over him. Something warm and then icy. Chills ran over his skin as his offspring sobbed twice, tears running down her cheek, then fully drifted into slumber. He grimaced and shuddered. Glancing over to Bill, his chill bumps flourished once again to see the demon leering down at Atlantica. His gaze was cold and harrowing, piercing straight through her as though he was staring directly into her brief mortality. Dipper's eyes locked on Bill, entranced.
The demon's eye flickered back to his lover. Whereas the normal human reaction would be to feign a shift in tone, Bill knew better. He looked back down at the baby and gestured to her rosy cheeks.
"You wanna put a fan towards it or something? It looks to me like it's overheating." Dipper relaxed, his ample trust in Bill terribly misplaced.
"Good idea." The young man left the room to retrieve a small fan from the closet down the hall. When he returned, Bill was in the same place, except that he was actively adjusting the blanket around the child, giving her a bit of breathing room. Dipper felt a small wave of relief and shook his head, feeling silly for ever worrying.
When she had been proper sound asleep, the pair exited the room and started back down the stairs.
"Hey Bill?" Dipper began unexpectedly.
"Yeah, kid?"
"Thanks for hanging out with me these past few days. I know it's not exactly your usual scene or anything," Dipper said, "but it's been a lot of fun. You're great company."
"I know I am," Bill remarked with confidence. Dipper laughed.
"And you've been so great with Atlantica too man, like, she hardly ever cried this weekend!"
Bill exuded a sultry smile in return, then took Dipper's hand as they headed for living room. Only the light of the television shining down the hallway and Bill's aura illuminated their way. Just before the archway to the living room, Dipper stopped to rest against the door frame. His drowsiness was becoming a delirium. He smiled goofily at Bill and rubbed his eyes.
"I think the tea is starting to wear off," he told him.
"Have another cup!" Bill offered cheerfully, already pouring one. Dipper raised a hand and shook his head.
"No thanks, that's enough for me. The girls come home tomorrow and I should probably be ready for them."
"Boy I just can't believe our little staycation is coming to an end already. Feels like we haven't had enough time together, huh Pines?"
Dipper shook his head, "Definitely not."
Bill lit up and swooped toward Dipper, taking one hand in his.
"Pine Tree, we should run away together!"
"Whoa, what?" Dipper laughed.
"We can go to the ends of the galaxy where time stands still and you can be immortal with me!"
Dipper laughed again and put the other hand on Bill's side, "I think we both know that's just a distant dream."
"And? I'm the god of dreams, kid," Bill pointed to his eye and blinked, insinuating that he was winking. Dipper shook his head and laid it back against the wall, hand sliding down Bill's edge.
Bill's eyelid sunk and he let out a soft breath. A tiny black hand came up to cup Dipper's.
"We can do this forever," he said in low, hesitating on the thought to send a hidden message, "this weekend can last for eternity."
Dipper was at a loss for words at the moment, too exhausted to articulate his feelings into coherent thoughts, let alone sentences. All he knew was that Bill looked good, and that he wanted to be close to him. He pulled the demon into his arms, and exhaled.
"I wanna be with you forever," he mumbled tiredly, reveling in Bill's warm radiance. Bill, initially surprised and a tad bit unsure, fell into the embrace. If he had a heart, it would be racing. Instead, his temperature rose, prompting Dipper to hug him closer. The young man swallowed a lump in his throat and took a deep breath, breathing hot against Bill's bricks, "I still love you, Bill."
The demon didn't say anything.
"I know, I know—you're over me, we broke up ages ago, and we were just supposed to be friends. And I-I shouldn't have let myself fall this hard again for you, but you're just so charming and smart and perfect and funny—I couldn't help it! I have so many regrets. I was young and selfish and I didn't know what it was like to be so madly in love with someone until I met you. I did reckless things and—I just..." Tears streamed down Dipper's face. His heart pounded in his chest, hands trembling, knees weak. The reminder of their traumatic break up was almost too much to bear but he was gushing now and couldn't stop. "I can't take back what I did," he sobbed, "but I know what I want now. And I've known for years. I try to deny and deny and block it all out because I have to. For Pacifica and Atlantica and Mabel, but I want you, Bill. I want you more than I've ever wanted anything. More than knowledge, more than fame, more than all the adventures in the world." He swallowed hard. "I love you."
Dipper planted his wet face against Bill's pinnacle. He trembled as he held the demon, Bill's face buried in Dipper's chest.
Bill didn't move until Dipper pushed him back to get a read on his face. His elongated pupil was as tiny and narrow as a needle, eye wide and thoughtful. He flickered back and forth between Dipper's reddened eyes. Eventually he spoke.
"Dipper..."
"Wait wait wait, whatever you're gonna say just—"
Bill cut him off mid-sentence with an abrupt kiss. His little fingers tangled into thick brown locks and gripped him tight. After a beat of surprise, Dipper passionately kissed him back. His hands locked tight and a little rough on Bill's sides, working the demon up to a state of dizzy euphoria. When his thumbs brushed Bill's vertexes, a pleasured moan emanated from his form. His little nail-less fingers scraped down the sides of Dipper's skull, urging the young man to roll his hips forward and release a heavy breath.
As they ground and made out against the doorframe, car lights passed by the windows, sending streaks of light across the walls. The background utterance of the television deafened to their passionate ears. And when Dipper's lightheadded self was close to collapsing, he pushed Bill back and gazed into his eye with urgent desire.
Then, in an instant, the pair found themselves in the past—stumbling up the stairs toward the bedroom so they could make sweet, ardent love.
A/N: /watch?v=x-Jo25SL56A
