So, I'm back after my writer's block! :) I hope you'll all enjoy this chapter, because I've been having a lot of trouble with getting it the way I wanted it to be before inspiration struck me and got me writing again.


Chapter fifty-nine

"Okay, Ed, we'll be leaving in about an hour, what do you want to do until then?" Daddy asked as he put down the phone after saying goodbye to Terrence. Ed was sitting on his arm and he thought of something he'd been wondering about since yesterday.

"Daddy? Do you think Al will teach me how to fight if I ask him?" Ed asked quietly.

Daddy paused. "I'm sure he would, but do you really want to learn how to fight? You're only five..."

Ed looked up at him, right into his eyes, feeling tears in his own. "I just thought it could make me less scared... Al told me that I was really scared when on Yock Island in the beginning, but then I learnt how to fight and I got really strong and I... I want that, Daddy... And then Al could spar with me again just like we used to and it just... I think it would be good... 'Cos I hate being scared, Daddy. My tummy hurts all the time and I don't want it to do that."

His black eyes were filled with pain and warmth at the same time, before he placed his right hand at the back of Ed's head and kissed his forehead. "Then do you want to ask him right now?"

Ed nodded. "Mhm."

And so Daddy carried him back to the bedroom where Al was now straightening out the sheets. "Oh, how did it go?" Al asked cheerfully.

"We're picking them up in ninety minutes on the way to the library. I've arranged to have a military car waiting for us there so that we won't need to have my aunt send one of the girls to pick us up again like yesterday."

"Oh, that's great! And then we'll get to say hello to them too!" Al suddenly turned his head down a bit to look at Ed. "Hey, Brother? What's wrong?"

"Al? Could you teach me to fight so that I can get strong like I used to be?" Ed asked quietly.

"Oh, of course I can, Brother... But are you sure that you really want to learn how to do it? You're plenty strong already... You don't need to know how to fight to be strong."

Ed looked at him, feeling tears in his eyes. "But I don't wanna be scared any more."


If Al could cry, he would have. If he could sob, then he'd probably be lying curled up on the floor, shaking with wails of grief.

And for once, having a body that couldn't cry was a blessing of sorts. Because he didn't want to break down sobbing on his brother when he needed Al to be the strong one. To be the big brother. Because Ed was scared and crying and wanted it to stop. Brother spent so much time in fear and tears and if sparring would help him, then that was what Al would teach him.

But still... It had been so long now since the last time he sparred with Big Brother. It was something that they had done together. And Al missed it. But teaching Ed now would hurt even so.

And so he walked over and picked Brother up in his arms. "Then I'll teach you. But even if I'll be careful, there's still a chance that you could get hurt, you know that, right?"

Ed nodded. "Don't care. I... I... I can take a lot of pain... 'Cos nothing's as bad as the n-needles," he said quietly, looking down.

Al wasn't sure if this was a good idea. "Brother, if you don't like it, then tell me and we'll stop. You shouldn't do something that you don't want to. So promise me you'll tell me, okay?"

Ed nodded once, and then looked up at Al with tearful fear, but there was a little hint of Big Brother's fierce determination in there.

Al felt another wave of grief wash over his soul. Because Big Brother was gone. Gone, but not dead. It had become a mantra of sorts.

Gone, but not dead.

Gone, but not dead.

"Hey, Al, we've got time for a sparring session before lunch, you in?"

"Nuh-huh, definitely a draw. I had the sun in my eyes so it doesn't count."

"One day I'll beat you, Al, just you wait."

Sparring had become some sort of sacred ritual between them. And it was why Teacher hadn't demanded that Al spar with her instead the week that they had visited. Because Al had told her that it just didn't feel right without Big Brother. He would of course keep sparring, and he had done so with Dad a few times, but this was a big step. This was sparring with his brother.

"Then let's start with some fighting stances, Brother," Al told him kindly as he put him down on the floor.

"'Kay. Thanks, Al." Ed dried away his tears and then put up his arms in a very sweet and childlike attempt at a fighting stance.

And so Al knelt down and began helping him adjust his position. Ed looked up at him in constant search for reassurance that he was doing things correctly. He was asked to stand normally again and then try to recreate the stance. Al gently placed his hand on Brother's left thigh and put a little bit of pressure on it to make him bend his knee further. He felt so odd and sad about such a small thing. Because there weren't any gruesome scars. The limb was made of flesh.

...And his little big brother was transmuted to his shape. Those monsters had taken his only remaining family and deconstructed and reconstructed him. It made sense that the only way that that had been possible was that Lillian had given up about forty to fifty years of her life as the toll.

Alphonse didn't know what they would have done if Roy Mustang hadn't done what he did. Because Al had, and still did, need a parent more than ever.

He wasn't sure if many people had noticed it, but everyone that had known Big Brother, that had teased him about his height... Hadn't done it for the past two months. "Small" and "little" had become seldom used adjectives when said out loud. Because nobody thought it was funny.

...Because those words had become some of the most painful there were. They were just a cruel reminder. Nobody made short jokes. Nobody told Ed to drink his milk.

Al couldn't help it as he picked Brother up and hugged him gently.

And he couldn't help but think that human transmutation was possible as long as the price was high enough, and most importantly, the soul was still intact. Was still there.

Al froze.

"Brother, I need to talk to Dad alone, why don't you go scratch Rolf's belly?"

Ed looked up at him in confusion, but nodded. "'Course, Al."

And so Al put him down and Brother disappeared out the bedroom door. Dad closed it behind him, looking worried. "Al, what's wrong?"

"Dad, Brother was deconstructed and reconstructed through alchemy... That's basically human transmutation, but on a living human being... And Big Brother always said that we didn't pay the price for Mom's soul... We didn't even manage it by me losing my entire body and Big Brother his left leg... So how could he pull back my soul by paying with only one limb? My body was entirely deconstructed... But what if it was reconstructed somewhere else? The soul is connected to the body, so if my body was gone, and I was technically dead, then it shouldn't have been possible to bring me back... Which is why he only had to give up one limb, because I wasn't."

Dad had gone pale, his eyes wide, and he strode over and knelt down in front of Al. He took Al's right hand in both of his, mumbling, taking in the information. "...Because your soul was still bound to your body... Because your body still exists... But if it hasn't eaten for the past four years..." Dad froze. "Oh, god... Ed."

Al nodded. Part of him was relieved that Dad agreed and had reached the same conclusion so quickly. But it made him both happy and nervous. If his body was still somewhere out there, and Brother's body proved it, then... "He's eating about three times as much as a normal five-year-old... And during the day and night put together, he sleeps about sixteen hours..."

"...Which he didn't do at first, but the number of hours he's asleep has increased for the past two months... Because of the strain on his body. It's the only way that he has enough energy to function properly..."

"And yet he doesn't gain any weight other than what's normal for someone his age."

Dad paled even more. "...Al, sustaining someone three times older than himself..."

Al nodded, fear building even more. "We need to get my body back as soon as possible..."

"...Or the strain on his body could kill him, and so your body would die too."


Riza was sitting with Ed on her lap, still feeling sick at what had happened to him.

"Uh, what the hell is going on here?" Ed suddenly said, but in a tone of voice that wasn't the sweet, innocent one she had grown accustomed to over the past two months.

She froze.

Ed turned around and looked at her, eyes widening, the golden orbs having a very different glint than usual for the small boy.

...But a very familiar one for his older form. "Lieutenant Hawkeye?! Why... Why am I sitting on your..." Then he gasped, looking down at himself. "Oh, hell no! Is this what those freaks meant by adopting me?!" He jumped off of Riza's lap before looking left and right, panicking. "Where's Al?! Is he okay?!"

Riza just stared and pointed towards the bedroom door. "He's in there with the Colonel... What's happening to you...?"

The boy ran at the door, pushing the handle down. Then he froze in the doorway. "Uh... Colonel, why are you hugging Al?"


Ed was confused and alarmed and more than a little uncomfortable at the Colonel's expression, seeing as how there was a lot of affection in his eyes.

"B-Big Brother?" Al asked shakily. "Is that really you?"

"Uh, yeah? Where are we? Why are you hugging the Colonel? What's going on in general and why was I sitting on the Lieutenant's lap?"

Mustang paled considerably, sitting down on the floor. "What... What... You don't remember the past two months?"

Ed just looked back at him, a lump forming in his stomach. "Two months? But that Lillian lady was being creepy only a minute ago about preparing me for being their son... And..." Ed had horrible realisation strike him. "I haven't been living with them for two months and then you found me a few hours ago or something like that, right?"

For some reason, Mustang looked heartbroken. "No... We found you after a week... You... You were back to your five-year-old stage, not even knowing that your mother was dead. The past ten years had been wiped from your memory, but it would appear that that isn't quite the case now."

Edward paused, feeling awkward. "...You're not telling me that we've been living with you, right?"

"Yes, Brother... And he's our adoptive father now." Al's voice was quiet and shocked.

Horror or confusion made Ed's stomach feel like it had dropped down past his toes as he looked between Al and the Colonel. Then he began chuckling nervously. "Uh, that's a joke, right? Or was it involuntary just to keep us from being separated or something? Or like a bodyguardly adoption?"

What he didn't expect, was that the Colonel would suddenly get to his feet, stride over with a tear in his left eye...

...And then kneel down in front of Ed and hug him close. Hug him in a way that didn't suggest that he was unfamiliar with embracing Ed like this. "It's the kind of adoption brought on by looking after my sons and growing to love them, Fullmetal."

Ed just froze. He had no idea what to do. The Colonel was being creepy as hell. But judging by his voice, he meant every single word. And Al didn't sound like he was regretting the adoption either. And so Ed wanted to tell Mustang to stop being so creepy...

...But he couldn't get himself to do it... Not when the man sounded like that... Not when he actually referred to them as his sons. Because it was clear that Mustang actually loved them, and had been missing Ed desperately by the sound of it, for two months. And his body was still so young that it kind of enjoyed it. His instincts were telling him that he was safe and happy in this embrace as he was placed on Mustang's lap. So he supposed that his host(?) actually loved the Colonel back.

...But it was still creepy as hell.

He heard clanking and soon had Al's hand on his back. "I-I've missed you, Big Brother."

Edward was at a loss. He couldn't exactly say that he had been missing Al, because it had felt like he had only seen him about five hours ago. "I'm sorry?" was all that his brilliant mind could come up with. "I really don't remember... There's nothing from the past two months... But why? Because if that me you've been living with only remembers the first..." Ed's eyes went wide with horrified realisation. "He remembers the parts that I don't... Because I can't remember anything that happened before Mom got sick now... But if my head has shrunk, including my brain... There are a lot of things that I know that shouldn't be possible..." His mind was racing, trying to make up theories, and found one that made the most sense. "But they couldn't just delete parts of my soul, could they? My soul works independently of my body, yours proves that, Al... So instead of deleting the last ten years, I've been split into two? I mean, you can't have two souls, because you're only born with one..."

Ed thought hard, looking down at his limbs, remembering how they had removed both automail ports. "Uh, did they sort of deconstruct and then reconstruct my body, which is why they needed to remove the ports first? Mass-wise, it should work, considering my current size... But they've definitely seen the Portal of Truth to know how to do something as sick as this... I mean, I don't even know how to do something like what they did..." Ed had to admit that this was getting too uncomfortable, being hugged like this by the Colonel. "Okay, uh, this is just getting too creepy, could you... Could you please release me, Colonel?"

There was a very substantial amount of awkwardness as Ed was released from Mustang's arms, and instead decided to sit down on the floor with his legs crossed. He studied his right hand, flexing his fingers, uncomfortable at the feeling of having a flesh right arm again after four years. He felt weird and numb and... fleshy. There was no metal. Just four flesh limbs. And he was...

"I'm a five-year-old... I'm a damn five-year-old..." He looked up at his little brother, feeling his stomach clench with guilt. "Sorry, Al... I failed you..."

Al reached over and lifted Ed onto his lap, making him feel very much like a kid. But he wasn't going to tell Al off for hugging him. If Al had thought that he was gone for good for the past two months... Ed could feel tears building. "Actually, Brother, Dad has picked up where you left off. We're leaving for the library to decode some research documents on how to make a Philosopher's Stone."

Ed froze. There was a lot to take in. The news were amazing, but Al...

...Al's calling the Colonel "Dad" like it's the most natural thing in the world...

"Why aren't you that excited about it, Al?" Ed asked in worry.

The Colonel sighed. "Because the man who made it told us that it wasn't the answer to our problems... That it would only lead to hardships... And that he only knew how to create imperfect compounds... We met a man in Liore who had one of those, and the result of the rebound wasn't exactly too pretty..."

Ed suddenly had realisation hit him. "Basically, if the compound is incomplete and causes a rebound, we'll be in a lot of trouble and pain and Al could be so too because we can't get his body right?"

Mustang nodded, but his eyes were heavy with something else. "...And he also told us that they were used to kill thousands of people during the war in Ishbal... And I don't particularly enjoy the thought of something that was used as a weapon that the military kept secret... Including from the "Hero of Ishbal", if you get what I mean..."

Ed was getting even more uncomfortable. Their lead suddenly didn't sound too promising any more. But once again, he found himself conflicted and confused as to what to focus on. Because the Colonel had completely let down his guard now. For the past few minutes, never once had he seemed smug or manipulative or anything other than nice.

And apparently this had been brought on by what had happened to Ed. And Al loved him. And Mustang was being his little brother's dad like it had become natural to him. Because Roy Mustang enjoyed being their father.

Ed felt his stomach clench again. This was really just getting more and more uncomfortable. And he needed to know how he could help them out. And so he had a theory he needed to try out, which meant that he clapped his hands and pressed them to the floor, transmuting a small, horned dragon. He began muttering to himself. "Okay, so I can still use clapping alchemy, even if my brain has forgotten how to do it... Which makes sense as the toll for that knowledge has still been paid... Because my leg is still gone, seeing as how my size has been based on both missing limbs, which is why Al's soul is still bound to the armour." Then Ed clenched his fists as realisation struck him. "And you two aren't even searching for a way to get me back to normal because it can't be done... But question is why this part of my soul has suddenly re-emerged? I mean, fifteen-year-old me doesn't remember anything that has happened since those freaks captured me, so I haven't exactly been stuck in two months of torment... After all, it's still one soul that's following a single timeline. It's just that there are two parts that can be switched between. None of the parts are replicas. Because they're two parts of a whole, but not a pair, if you get what I mean? But why now? What would warrant the five-year-old me to be switched off?"

The Colonel sighed heavily. "I think you needed a break... Because you haven't been doing too well at times after what happened to you. It's only to be expected when a five-year-old gets tortured for four days straight."

Ed paused. "Tortured?"


Roy could do nothing but stare as the boy before him stared back. Roy hadn't held anything back as he gave him the brief recount of the main events of the past two months. It was so odd. So heartbreakingly odd to look at the child before him. Because the eyes held none of that love that he had grown accustomed to. None of the innocent sweetness. Just awkwardness, confusion, sadness and a bit of guilt. And he was of course blushing. "So... So I really didn't have a good day, huh?" Fullmetal asked. He actually seemed embarrassed by his reaction to what had happened the day before.

Roy shook his head. He was both overjoyed and worried. He suddenly had both Fullmetal and his son. But now he was scared that he would lose one of the two parts for good. He had Fullmetal back, but then the five-year-old him would be gone... "I'm sorry, Fullmetal... I really should have looked after you better... Both parts of you... Whenever you trust me, you seem to-"

"I seem to get a way to keep moving forwards, so just shut up, Colonel," the kid interrupted him. He was still sitting on Al's lap. Still being hugged by his little brother. "Besides, I'm the one who keeps running away while you're the one who finds me, so stop guilt-tripping yourself, it's just stupid..." Then he pointed his right index finger at him sternly, glaring, obviously able to tell that Roy was about to protest. "I told you to shut up about that stuff!" Then he looked down and ran his hands through his hair in frustration. "So, yeah, I see what you mean about needing a break. It's been what, seventy minutes or so? Seventy minutes without being scared or worried is probably a blessing for him... me, whatever! Dammit! But he was supposed to be getting a day off once you leave for the library, so why didn't it happen yesterday? He doesn't need it now, right?"

Realisation hit Roy, and he couldn't help but chuckle slightly. "He wanted a recharge before his playdate."

Fullmetal paused. "Oh... That's nice, I suppose... But how will that work out, seeing as how I'm... Uh... Me?"

Roy sighed. "Knowing him, I'd say that he'll fix that all on his own... So I'm afraid that that means that you don't have a lot of time as this you... Or at least I suppose so... So what do you want us to do?"

Fullmetal looked awkward. "...I suppose teaching him how to switch between us would be a good idea... Should he get into trouble, then I'm a lot more useful than he is... And also because Al needs me to transmute his armour if it becomes damaged. I'm the only one who can do that... And if you guys just wanna talk, I guess? I think his part of the connection is more dominant because it's more adapted to this body." Then he shrugged apologetically. "I'm sorry... But I think he's sorta got first dibs... He's five, I'm not... And he's got plenty of things to be upset about. We don't need to add to his worries by having him constantly lose even more parts of his life. And it's not like I'm in pain or bored. It's either/or, not both of us at the same time... You don't have to feel bad about me missing you, 'cos frankly I don't. Past two months... Not there. Which explains the memory loss on both ends..." Ed looked down awkwardly. "So don't worry, and enjoy the little guy... And take care and-"

The alarm clock on the nightstand suddenly rang. Roy had set it so that they wouldn't lose track of time.

"Daddy? Why am I here? I was on Auntie Riza's lap... Wasn't I? What's going on? What's wrong?" Ed asked in confusion, fear obviously gripping his heart. Hawkeye immediately headed for the nightstand to turn the alarm off, while Roy scooped Ed up into his arms, feeling dazed. He hadn't told Fullmetal about his body sustaining Al's. It wouldn't make things go faster, and it would only cause him unnecessary worry.

And then a single thought struck him as he thought back to his dream from earlier this morning.

...Maybe I should start a business as a psychic?


So, I've decided to respond to all the reviews I get for my stories in their respective author's notes. So please keep reviewing, but no flames, please, and so here we go!

Guest: I'm so happy to hear you enjoyed the dream, I hope you enjoyed this part too :)

mintpolo: I think "cute" is a word that can be used for about 90 per cent of the story, so I very much agree ;)

mc-squishy: I am thrilled to hear that you're excited for more Charlie, because I can promise you that I'm excited about writing her :)

ShaharahDatBoi: Thank you for calling the chapter "beautiful", it really warms my heart. And little Ed became very precious to me very quickly.

lizyeh2000: I hope this chapter lived up to your expectations :)

Fullmetalkitsuna: I'm glad to hear that you enjoy this take on FMA:B, I hope you'll keep enjoying it :)


And thank you so much to all you readers, reviewers, favouriters and followers. I am still astounded that a story that I didn't even know if I should post at the time, has become my longest and one of my most popular ones