Chapter 13: Action
When it's obvious that the goals cannot be reached, don't adjust the goals. Adjust the action steps - Confucius
Joelle smiled softly while she watched the sleeping figure of Tom in the bed. He had fallen asleep sometime after his session of anger earlier. His face was was expressionless as always as he lay there with his eyes closed. It was as if those months of absence have never happened, at least while the peace was there. Joelle sat at the desk and read a book, interrupted by a hearty yawn that ended in a cough when she realized Tom's eyes were wide open the next moment, staring at her. It was a bit scary.
"Marvolo", she said in surprise. "Did you rest well?"
"What time is it?" Asked Tom, sitting up.
"About ten in the evening. You missed dinner, I didn't want to wake you up. But we left you something. Want to eat now?"
"N-yes" Tom nodded, turning his face away when a low grumble erupted from his stomach. Joelle grinned but didn't comment it, instead, she held out her hand to him to pull him up. He took it and together they walked downstairs.
"Do you remember what you dreamt of?" Asked Joelle but Tom shook his head as he sat in front of his plate, poking around the food.
"I never dream. Actually." Tom murmured.
"What do you mean you never dream?" Joelle chuckled. "Everyone dreams."
Tom raised an eyebrow at her. "So you still think I'm like everyone else."
"You are very special. But dreams, really, it's something you can't control. Like...nyah, like this." She yawned, frowning when Tom did not yawn back.
"Did you make the food?" Asked Tom then, still observing his plate and only touched it when Joelle told him that she cooked it.
After having received something to eat, Tom seemed in a way better mood than before, especially when Joelle grinned and handed over some cut apple bits. Tom grinned back, but none of them commented it; they merely walked upstairs afterwards.
"It's late, snowman. I will go to bed." Joelle smiled and hugged Tom, but he did not let go when Joelle did.
"Stay with me", he murmured. "You already moved into my room. Where would you sleep anyway?"
"Bryan's room isn't being used yet, I could-"
"We will get the mattress." Said Tom. "Then you can stay with me." He started walking off, not even caring about what Joelle thought of it. She merely crossed her arms and leaned against the wall while watching Tom hurrying over into Bryan's room, getting the mattress, pulling it over into his, running past her to get the blanket and pillows, then back into his room again. Joelle smiled to herself and sighed softly when Tom peeped his head around the wall.
"Come." He said.
Joelle still smiled and walked into the room again, sitting down on the mattress, snickering at how Tom had fluffed up the pillows and folded over a part of the blanket to make it look more comfortable. It was rare to see that side of him - but even rarer to experience it. No, it was impossible to experience it.
"So caring, aren't you?" Grinned Joelle. Tom only huffed.
"I was going to take the mattress...but as you wish." He shrugged and the corner of his mouth twitched up in a halfway smirk as he threw himself onto the bed, his back facing Joelle.
"Pah! Good night then." Chuckled Joelle and turned over.
"Good night. Silly girl." Tom sighed, feeling a pillow hitting the back of his head. He didn't budge at all, but fell asleep with a grin.
"Joelle. Wake up."
"Mhnm..."
"Wake up now!" Hissed Tom, causing Joelle to shoot up, looking around.
"What happened?! Is it Amy and Dennis again?!" She rubbed the side of her head, then realized it was not her aunt who woke her up.
"Snowman...what's all the fussing about?"
"Mrs. Cole must have gotten you out of bed sometimes for them, huh? Amy and Dennis. What did the little crybabies whine about?" Asked Tom with a smirk as he leaned against the wall, staring down at Joelle.
"They are still traumatized, Marvolo." She said sternly, a scowl showing on her face. She rarely ever scowled, which is why Tom took it seriously, deciding not to further talk about it. For now.
"Will you be busy today?" He asked.
"It's Christmas Eve today." Smiled Joelle, sitting up. "I will be a bit busy, yes. Helping my aunt with the food and such."
Joelle. Always helping her aunt - it seemed like she wanted to pay her debt of living here. Tom couldn't think of anything else - she couldn't just do it to be nice, where was the benefit of that? Especially after he was gone, who was left worth being nice to?
"I believe that's why Martha doesn't like you." Said Tom suddenly, looking down at her. Joelle looked up to him curiously. Why would he say something like that?
"Because you're kind of taking over her job. She used to be the helper here before you came. And now she's at the other wing with the little ones and the other helpers. She probably feels outrun by a seventeen year old."
"That might be true. You're so observant when it comes to how people could feel, Marvolo. That will be important in the future, you know. You don't always have to feel the same but you need to understand them." Smiled Joelle and got up, stretching and yawning. Tom just watched her.
"I think of you when I think of how others could feel." He said.
"What do you mean?"
"I imagine how you would evaluate the situation. I imagine your thinking process in order to understand what others could be feeling or thinking. Because you're always right." He mumbled the last part as if it didn't taste good.
"You're so cute", sighed Joelle, "I just want to squeeze and cuddle you all day long." She smiled and sat down on the edge of the bed.
"You're always so physical." Sighed Tom then, shaking his head. "You can't go around and love everyone. You'll only end up getting hurt."
"I don't love everyone. I just think that everyone deserves some love."
"Everyone?" Frowned Tom. "Even John?"
Joelle stared at him, then chuckled. "Tell me why you think John behaved the way he did."
"He loved you?" Asked Tom, thinking to be this the thing Joelle wanted to hear. But she shook her head.
"Oh, no. John did not love me. Love doesn't do that."
"Why else did he want to possess you, why else did he stalk you, threaten you, do anything for you to stay with him?" Asked Tom with a frown.
"He did all of those things because he did not love me." Said Joelle simply before she walked off, leaving Tom behind to think about these words.
"Is it true that he's back?" Whispered Eric to Joelle - Joelle nodded while sitting with the kids around the table, crafting like last year. Her eyes swept to the empty spots of Amy and Dennis, and despite the circumstance that Tom could clearly see how much she pitied that they were not here, she tried to be in a good mood for everyone else.
"I want him to leave again..." Murmured Matt then. "Our life here has been so much easier since he's been gone..."
"Matt", frowned Joelle with a scolding tone, "don't be so mean. All of you are orphans, I don't understand why you can't stick together like a family."
Matt shrugged. "We tried. But you weren't here, you didn't have to grow up with a boy who-", though Matt kept quiet the moment he spotted Tom walking into the dining room with crossed arms and a calculated, daring glance. Matt said no more.
"Marvolo", smiled Joelle. "Sit with us, will you?"
"Why haven't you been in our room." Asked Tom, his tone closer to a demand than a true question. Joelle glanced up to him; Tom wasn't sure whether she was surprised of his tone or the fact that he called his previous room their room now; after all, he wasn't famous for his generous and sharing nature.
"You've been napping and I did not want to disturb you. You seemed very exhausted, dear. You didn't miss anything, don't worry", smiled Joelle.
Wrong, Tom thought. Of course he missed something. Deciding to let the topic be for now, after all, it was Christmas Eve and he knew how much Joelle despised arguing, he simply sat down and watched the tenseness of the atmosphere growing thicker and denser. He couldn't help grinning while everyone tried their very best to avoid looking at him. Joelle seemed so oblivious to that while she and Billy sprinkled chocolate over some cookies, her eyes reflecting joy when Mrs. Cole finally walked down, forcing a smile at Tom, reaching out a hand to his back to rub it softly.
"Ah, Tom, good to see you. I'm quite sorry I couldn't get to say hello earlier - busy as always. So eh. Heh. How...how is school?" She asked, making the whole situation a lot more awkward than it was. Tom, however, decided to play along for the while.
"Good" he said simply, watching Joelle like a hawk.
"They treat me well." Tom added, his eyes swept over to Mrs. Cole as if to indicate 'unlike you'.
"Well...", Mrs. Cole cleared her throat and nodded with another insincere smile.
"Then I suppose you are having a very good time, yes?" She asked insecurely. Tom knew she tried to make sure that he truly liked where he was at - because she definitely did.
"I'm having the best time of my life. Almost..." He murmured the last part while watching Joelle giggling around, smearing some bit of melted chocolate on Billy's nose - who gasped and smeared some of the chocolate back onto her cheek. Tom felt his innards starting to boil and burn until they cooked up enough hatred for Billy to mysteriously wince upon some sharp pain in his stomach. To Tom's unexpectedness, Joelle of course rubbed Billy's back, walking him upstairs while soothingly telling him that he probably sneaked too many cookies and that his 'tummy was upset'. Tom's narrowed eyes followed them, but he kept quiet, said nothing, tried to calm down. He could not allow himself to be expelled because of that. He still had a plan.
Joelle.
Soon.
And then screams erupted from downstairs. Mrs. Cole quickly ran into the dining room; frowning widely upon the very view ahead of her. Joelle couldn't have been there any quicker either.
"Amy! Dennis!" Gasped Joelle when the both of the kids stared ahead at Tom with eyes wide open and a look of terror reflected in them. Tom merely leaned against the wall with crossed arms, bored out of his mind, even though Joelle was sure she saw a little grin on his lips.
"Hello Amy and Dennis" said Tom then, causing Joelle to sigh in relief upon seeing that his grin turned into a soft and gentle smile as he walked closer to Amy - who clung to Dennis, burying her face against his chest. Tom sighed, sadly looking up to Joelle and Joelle seemed to wipe away a tear, then shook her head at Tom as if to say "don't worry, sweetheart". Mrs. Cole led the two traumatized kids out of the dining room eventually, Tom and Joelle watched how she brought them over to Martha at the other wing.
Tom remembered very well why he did not want to come here. While his chills of disgust increased during the plenty of Christmas songs they sang as the evening progressed, he could only think of one thing, over and over again. Certainly he did not spend a single moment regretting any of his decisions; not the least was he concerned with any consequences. There wouldn't be any, simply put.
"Marvolo? Are you not listening?" Smiled Joelle as she offered him a cookie that Tom declined.
"Of course I'm listening" he said, wondering what it was that she was saying. He hated himself for not paying attention - how could Joelle say something next to him without him noticing? His thoughts required too much of him. Tom always heard what she had to say, was always there to judge her words, to comment, to agree, to disagree, to discuss yes, even to adore at times.
"Marvolo?" Joelle asked once more. Tom frowned at her. Did she speak to him again? Did he miss it again? He couldn't believe it. Tom ran a hand through his hair, staring at her for a couple of seconds, fixing her with his eyes. He felt sick. His thoughts and thinking processes subtracted the attention he could spend on reality - on her. He had to stop, stop the obsessive thoughts at once.
"What?" Tom then asked. Joelle chuckled; the other kids were silent while eating. Billy shifted uncomfortably in his chair.
"Nothing, snowman. It wasn't important" smiled Joelle while busying herself with the pumpkin cream soup that, much to Tom's surprise, was so much better than at Hogwarts, he had to agree. But he did not agree with something else.
"I want to know what you said" he murmured lowly, staring at her. "Repeat your words. Please..." he added once he saw her stern glance.
"I said that we should build a snowman tomorrow" said Joelle then, smiling, but Tom did not smile back. Quite on the contrary, he even glared.
"And why did you say it's not important?! You wouldn't have told me had I not asked you to repeat your words! Not important!" He raised his voice, causing the other kids to frown with open mouths - even Mrs. Cole could not help staring wide eyed. Joelle's facial expression, however, did not change. She looked at Tom calmly as ever and decided not to comment, simply continuing to eat.
Tom felt the rage increasing, he tried to calm down again, not wanting to lose it, not on her, not now that he could be expelled for letting his stray magic off the leash. Then again, why didn't anything happen when Billy had these cramps earlier? There was no mistaking, Tom wanted Billy to suffer, couldn't control himself - why, though, why didn't it have any consequences yet? It must've been magic that Tom used on him, of course, only he could have this effect on somebody. How very strange. The Trace must be inconsequent. But when?
"Joelle. Come with me" said Tom then, getting up. Joelle glanced around, seeing that most of the kids were done, and so she got up, following Tom upstairs quietly. He locked he door as soon as she was in his room with him.
"Old habit?" Chuckled Joelle, but Tom merely walked past her.
"Look...I need to tell you something." Tom murmured, sitting down on the bed. Joelle frowned, sitting next to him, seeming worried. "What is it?"
"I...will not stay here for two weeks" he suddenly murmured, causing Joelle to frown widely.
"Why?" She asked, her voice turning soft and sad. "You said you would..."
"The Hogwarts express leaves thrice during the holidays. That's the 23rd of December and also the 26th of December - in case children want to stay at Hogwarts for Christmas but want to celebrate New Year's Eve with their families - and also in case of any immediate and unforeseen changes, so children can return quickly. That being said...I will take the train back on the 26th of December and not on January the 6th."
"But why?" Asked Joelle again, lowering her head. "I won't be seeing you until summer then...I don't understand why you don't want to stay here with us?"
Tom sighed. "I just had the feeling that I'm not very welcome here anymore. And you're distant...I guess I came here with the wrong expectations." He looked away, suppressing a small grin when he heard Joelle's quiet sniffling.
"It breaks my heart to hear this...Of course you're welcome here..." She said softly. Tom glanced at her from the corner of his eye, but didn't yet turn around.
"Am I?" He whispered.
"Of course you are! Stop being silly!" Joelle suddenly hissed; a sound Tom has never heard from her. He liked it.
"Then why didn't you tell me that you wanted to build another snowman?"
"When you didn't hear me I thought I would just surprise you with it tomorrow. That's why I didn't repeat myself and said it wasn't important...do we really have to discuss about something like that? It's Christmas Eve..." She sighed, and Tom turned around to her, inhaling deeply.
"Stay with me and I'll stay with you" said Tom then, looking into Joelle's eyes. "Don't go downstairs anymore."
"Fine" smiled Joelle and leaned back. "You're so vain, you know?" She asked, then cackled when Tom huffed but leaned against the wall as well. Both of them were quiet. But at least she was here. With him. Tom liked this version of Christmas Eve a lot better.
And then soon came.
It was the day of the 25th of December. The room was all tidy when Tom watched Joelle sleeping - but when the clock hit six in the morning, he finally woke her up.
"Joelle." Tom said softly, nudging her shoulder. Joelle stretched and yawned, snickering once she saw Tom's face in the dim light.
"Snowman...it's tooooo early, let me sleep, will you?" She smiled and turned over again. Tom observed her closely, shaking his head.
"Wake up." He said again. "I have a surprise for you."
Joelle noticed how his voice vibrated in the air, it was soft and gentle and it beheld a tone that was not so familiar. When she sat up, there was a rectangular box, wrapped up in dark paper.
"Marvolo..." Joelle frowned upon the size. "What is this? Whatever it is, it's huge and...you shouldn't have..."
Tom chuckled. "Come on, don't make me wait for so long. I want to see your face" he said, urging Joelle to open it up. Joelle grinned but stretched and yawned, testing his patience.
"But you need to open the one I have for you first." She giggled, but Tom shook his head.
"Later" he murmured, pulling the blanket away from Joelle, causing her to yelp upon the freezing air.
"Cold! Alright! Alright. You can be such a pest, you know?" She laughed when Tom grinned, staring at her with insane longing when she finally started to unwrap it. Joelle frowned.
"A...what the?" She chuckled at the rectangular, copper colored steel cage.
"Where's the pet for that?" She asked with a bright smile which died out and ended in a silent scream when the next thing she saw was Tom's wand aimed at her - and she felt her body shifting and moving, her size changed. And soon, she was on the ground, looking around hastily, not knowing what just happened.
"I told you I would take you with me, Joelle." Whispered Tom, picking up the black furred cat, holding her up into the light. Joelle's widened eyes reflected nothing but the horror of naked insecurity and fear.
AN: Did you see that coming?
