A/N: Like I said this chapter works better before Ford shows up. Especially since I have quite a few original chapter post Not What he Seems. And sure it prevents me from making a "I want picture! Pictures of Spiderman!" joke... but seriously canon dropped the ball on that... Also fun fact about that line, it wasn't from one of the Spider Man movies, it was from the Simpsons, but it was still J.K. Simmons playing the role. Anyways! Enjoy!

Chapter 49: Roadside Attraction

Stan and Soos were packing up an RV full of stuff. Dipper noticed what they were doing.

"Whoa? And RV? Camping Gear?" asked Dipper, "Are you running from the law again?"

"If I was, your mom would be glaring at me." Said Stan.

"So you got everything you need?" asked Erza.

"I think so." Said Stan.

"So what's going on?" asked Dipper.

"It's the ultimate Oregon Road Trip." Said Soos.

"Well more lie revenge trip." Said Stan, "Every year my tourist trap competitors prank me. Last year the duck taped Soos to the celling."

"That was a fun 78 hours." Said Soos.

"Plus there was yearn incident of '98." Said Stan.

"The yarn incident of '98?" asked Dipper.

"I don't want to talk about it." Muttered Erza.

"Well no more!" said Stan taking out a map of Oregon and then handing it to Dipper, "This year we're vesting all of the tourist traps along the red wood highway. And I'm going to prank every ingle one."

"I still think this is a bad idea." Said Erza.

"Yeah, but that's why you're staying behind, in case they deicide to retaliate." Said Stan, "By the way thanks for telling me that might be a possibility."

Erza just sighed at this.

That was when Candy, Grenda, Marvelous and Carla showed up.

"Bow wow! Time for us road dogs to bark!" said Grenda she looked at Carla, "Sorry, no offense Carla."

"None taken…" said Carla.

"Thanks for letting me bring my friends on the road trip, Grunkle Stan." Said Mabel.

"The More the Merrier, just sign these none disclosure agreements." Said Stan he looked at Candy and Grenda, "Your parents aren't lawyers are they?"

Stan went to the talk to the girls (and one cat) about said agreements.

"What do you say dude? You want to come along?" asked Soos jumping down from the roof.

"It might be good for you to get away for a bit." Said Erza.

"I already went with the trouble of packing your stuff. Even your secret box from under your bed." Said Mabel.

However she needed up dropping the box, which opened up revealing pictures of Wendy.

"What the…" said Mabel.

"Oh Dipper…" said Erza patting him on the shoulder.

"Bro, I thought you were past all this!" said Mabel.

"I know, I know! I know she's not interested and I know it's over! But how do you just turn off how you feel about someone?" asked Dipper.

"I'm probably going to get in trouble for saying this, but I think Mom's relationship with Jellal is giving you false hope." Said Mabel.

"What?" asked Dipper.

"There's the time warp induced age difference and the fact she's been in love with Jellal since she was a kid." Said Mabel, "You have to do the opposite and get over her."

Mabel gave a weak smile, "Sorry mom…" said Mabel.

"No I actually agree." Said Erza.

"Yeah dude, and a road trip's the perfect place to meet new people." Said Soos.

Dipper looked at the picture of Wendy then at the map Stan gave him and then he looked up at the sky, making his decision.

Sometime later, they were enjoying the trip.

"Wow! RVs are amazing." Said Grenda, "I can't belie I'm sitting at a table in a moving vehicle."

"Earth technology is amazing." Said Marvelous, "They don't have thing like this in Earthland."

"Do they even have cars?" asked Grenda.

"Yeah, but they run on magic." Explained Marvelous.

"Ooh! Informational travel pamphlets." Said Candy who grabbed some and rubbed them against her cheeks, "I want opt read them and gain their knowledge."

"Kid, those pamphlets have never helped a single person." Said Stan, "The only wrinkly old travel guide you need is me. Now look alive, we're coming up on an attraction run by the most black hearted proprietor in all of Oregon."

It turns out the place was called "Granny Sweetkins' Yarn ball."

"Don't let the sweet face fool you, she's burned my car on two non-consecutive occasions and she can hold her own against Erza using just knitting needles." Said Stan.

"What? Seriously?" asked Dipper surprised.

'No way!" said Mabel.

"It's one of the reasons why she refused to come… along with Zany Schemes…" said Stan and mumbled under his "And I'm pretty sure alone time with Jellal."

Meanwhile at the Mystery Shack. In the living room. Erza was dressed like a maid.

"So what do you want to next sir?" she said seductively.

"Well I have some ideas." Said Jellal.

The two began to make out.

However there was a cough and both of them stopped.

They turned to see Laxus holding a beer.

"What are you doing here?" asked Erza, "I thought you were went on the road trip."

"I didn't go so I could protect the shack." Said Laxus, "That and you know…"

His motion sickness was really bad, even if Marvelous was going and she had a spell that helped with motion sickness (though it had limits).

There was an awkward silence.

"I have some thing to do." Said Erza requipping out of the maid costume.

"I should double check if I forgot anything at the dorms." sad Jellal coming up with an excuse.

"I should check to see if there's anything security problems with Stan gone…." Said Laxus.

It would be a while until Laxus could look the two in the eye.

The kids and cat all looked at the yarn ball.

"Whoa!" they all said.

"I bet you want to play with it." Grenda joked to Carla.

"That's a stereotype." Said Carla.

"Make way, I'm going in." said Mabel.

The other girls followed her as per plan while Carla acted as look out.

Dipper noticed a girl nearby eating ice cream.

"Okay, like Soos said, I should meet new people." Said Dipper.

He walked over to the girl.

"Oh uh… come here often?" asked Dipper.

"No, I'm a tourist." Said the girl.

Dipper laughed nervously.

"You're funny and cute… Uh… I mean not cute… I mean you're not cute. Let me start over…" Said dipper, "My name is Dopper…"

He held out his hand for a handshake and she dumped her ice cream in his hand.

"Dipper, Hup to! This yearn ball aren't going to prank itself." Said Stan over a walkie-talkie.

Mabel popped out of the yarn ball and gave Dipper a piece. He then tied it to the back of the RV.

"Something on your mind kiddo?" asked Stan, "You're thinking of miss cold shoulder over there?"

"I'm so embarrassed." Said Dipper, "Look earlier this summer I ruined my chances with Wendy."

"Yeah… chances…" Stan said sarcastically.

"I want to move on, but I'm terrible at talking to girls. The moment I open my mouth I unravel like… like..,. well I can't think of a perfect metaphor." Said Dipper.

Ironically right behind him the girls were working on unraveling the yarn ball behind him.

"At this rate, I'm probably going to grow up to be a dad loner like Toby Determined." Said Dipper.

"Whoa! Never say that about yourself." Said Stan, "Lucky for you I'm an expert on women."

"Are you sure, according to mom you're just as bad as she is when it comes to romance." Said Dipper.

"Did she that to you or was it from our usual jabs each other?" asked Stan.

Dipper didn't answer.

"When it comes to girls, always be confident. And be funny but not too funny. And be kind of annoying in a loveable way." Said Stan.

"I don't know Grunkle Stan, that sounds kind of jerky." Said Dipper.

"Hey! Jerky is a term non-jerks use to bad mouth innocent jerks." Said Stan, "Confidence, comedy and some other word that starts with C. Those are the three Cs of the Stan Pies dating technique. I want you try it out at the next tourist trap on the first girl you see."

"Okay, thanks Grunkle Stan." Said Dipper.

"Hey, I'm full of great ideas. Speaking of which! Everybody! Now!" he yelled out.

Stan, Dipper, Soos and Carla all ran into the RV, the girls left the yarn ball short after, and they all escaped unraveling the yarn ball with Grandma Sweetkins yelling at them.

Soon they were at their next location.

Which was an upside down house.

"Upside Town. The nausea capital of the state." Said Stan, "Whatever you do, don't sue the bathroom."

They all got to the house. Which involved them putting on special Velcro shoes and walking upside down.

"None of these fit." Said Carla.

"Can't you just fly upside down." Said Mabel.

"It's very difficult." Said Carla.

"How about I hold you." Offered Marvelous.

"I guess so." Said Carla.

They put on the shoes and went on this thing that brought them upside down so they got inside.

"This is so weird." Said Mabel.

Dipper looked around and saw a girl with pigtails. He thought back what Stan said.

He walked over and cleared his throat.

"Hi, I'm Dipper. Crazy place, right?" asked Dipper.

"Oh hi, I'm Emma Sue." Said the girl.

HOW DARE THAT GIRL HAVE THAT FIRST NAME AND SUE FOR A MIDDLE! IT MAKES THAT AWESOME NAME SOUND HORRIBLE!

Uh… never mind that…

"You know if we pretend if we're right-side up, then it looks like everyone's hair is standing up on their ends." Said Emma Sue.

"HI. Yeah, weird, right." Said Dipper, "Pretend you're screaming."

"Okay, you got to take a picture of me though." Said Emma Sue.

He handed him phone, and he took a picture of her pretending to scream after she undid her pigtails.

"Let's see about that…" said Dipper then he pretending to drop her phone (thanks to his magic he caught it right away).

"You are the worst." She said playfully.

"You bet I am, I'm bad! Kind of a jerk!" said Dipper.

"Emma! Come on!" yelled Emma's father with her very pregnant mother, "We have opt get to Canada before your mother gives birth!"

Emma Sue looked at dipper.

"It's a long story." Said Emma Sue.

"Maybe you can tell me sometime." Said dipper.

"Here's my e-mail address." Said Emma Sue, "Write me and I'll tell you."

She then left, and once she was gone Dipper began to celebrate.

"A girl gave me her e-mail! And it wasn't out of pity!" cheered Dipper he jumped up, and of course this caused him to fall to the "celling".

Turns out he fell right next to Mabel.

Marvelous headed over to him.

"I'm okay!" said Dipper, "I'm better than okay! You don't need to waste you magic on me! Use it for someone who really needs it."

"All right." Said Marvelous.

"Mabel hi! There's my Grenda! Having fun Carla? Candy, are those glasses? Very shiny!" said Dipper.

This made Candy blush.

"Maybe it's the blood pooling to my head, but Dipper seems different." Said Grenda as her forehead turned purple.

"And speaking of someone who would need Wendy's magic…" sad Carla.

"Yes… good different…" said Candy blushing.

Outside Stan and Soos pulled the house so that it was right side up.

The kids ran outside, ran into the RV and it burnt rubber. As a family said this "What a lovely normal home…"

As they drove away, Dipper and Stan talked.

"I can't believe that worked!" said Dipper, "What do I do now? DO I e-mail her?"

"Oh, no, no, no… You practice more." Said Stan, "The more girls you talk the better you'll get."

"Grunkle Stan, these tips are priceless." Said Dipper.

"That's just the tip of over the advice-berg." Said Stan.

And so Dipper hit on a girl at Log Land (Which Stan pranked with beavers) and the giant corn maze (which he used corn weevil).

Once they were getting away from the corn maze this happened.

"Is everyone on board?" asked Stan.

"Probably." Said Mabel.

Meanwhile in the corn maze.

"Hello! Guys!" called out Soos," They're come back for me."

That night at an RV park, Dipper and Stan were relaxing in a hot tub where Stan just finished a story about how he got a certain scar.

"Grunkle Stan, got to say, this was one of the best days of my life." Said Dipper showing off the phone number that covered his arms

"That's the Stan Pines Method kido. Works every time." Said Stan.

"I'm just a little worried though, I mean is bad to hid on so many girls at once ." Said Dipper, "I'm just trying to get over Wendy, I don't' want to hurt anyone."

"Oh come you would get dating advice from other male role models…." Said Stan who then realized something, "Then again… Jellal always loved your mom, Gray and Laxus have girls throw themselves at them, Natsu's an idiot, Soos is Soos… I guess you can get advice from Freed…"

"Freed wouldn't be able to give me girl advice." Said Dipper.

"Is he that nerdier than you?" asked Stan.

"No, it's because I'm 90 percent sure he's in love with Laxus." Said Dipper, "He's often blushes whenever I bring up Laxus. And I think I've seen him blush a little when talking to him too…"

Stan blinked, processing that information.

"Anyways you don't have to worry… that's the best thin about a road trip. You'll never see them again." Said Stan.

Meanwhile at the RV the girls were having a bon fire.

"All right! Time for Truth or Dare or Don't." said Mabel and Grenda at the same time.

"You don't have cat nip do you?" asked Carla, "because remember what happened last time we played this."

"I said I was sorry!" yelled Grenda.

"Anyways, Candy goes first." Said Mabel.

"I choose don't." said Candy.

"You always choose don't." said Grenda.

"Fine… Truth." Said Candy.

"Do you like someone?" asked Mabel.

Candy started blushing.

"Uh-oh, someone's blushing." Said Grenda.

"Maybe a little… I don't know for sure, it just started…" said Candy.

"Tell us! Tells us!" squealed both Mabel and Grenda.

"Okay, it be begins with a "D" and ends with a "Ipper"." Said Candy.

Mabel and Grenda gasped while Carla nodded.

"Okay Grenda on the count of 3." Said Mabel.

Marvelous covered her ears.

The two screamed so loud that Stan and Dipper heard them.

"Man coyotes sound a lot worse than I remember." Said Stan.

"Candy. Candy! All of my life long dreams are coming true." Said Mabel, "My brother and my best friend!"

"I can't breathe! I'm so excited I can't breathe." Said Grenda.

"To be honest, I think you two would make for a cute couple." Said Carla, "You two do have a lot in common."

"I never really noticed before, but he seems different lately. Less sweaty and more charming." Said Candy.

"Really?" asked Marvelous.

"How do I approach him?" asked Candy.

"Don't worry Can-Can." Said Mabel and then she stuffed marshmallows into her face, "Mabel's' got a plan."

The next day they headed to the next tourist trap.

"All right campers, another day of f breakin' laws and breakin' hearts." Said Stan.

"Did you just outright say we're law breaking." Said Carla.

"Hey I'm not going to be judged by a talking cat." Said Stan, "Anyways everything up until now have been a walk in the park compared to our next attraction."

"What is it? A walk in the world's largest park?" asked Mabel.

"Eh, sort of." Said Stan.

He mentioned to a large mountain, "There she is Mystery Mountain. Five times bigger than the Mystery Shack and what's worse she has real attractions."

"I have read about that place it has a sky tram, a mummy museum and sighting of half human have spider creatures." Said Candy showing of the pamphlet about the spider people.

"Even their made up legends are better than ours." Said Stan, "Today the mountain falls."

"Please tell me that's a metaphor…" said Carla.

"Once again, I'm not being judged by a talking cat." Muttered Stan.

"Question! The backseat makes me car sick… can I ride shot gun?" asked Mabel.

"Also Question? I have some questions about Earthland from Marvelous? Can I talk to her in private about them?" said Grenda.

"Yeah, sure…" said Stan with a shrug.

"All right! Change up!" said Mabel.

Candy started to blush.

"Whoo! Change up!" said Mabel.

She pushed Dipper to the very back seat.

"But wait, that just leave me and…" said Dipper.

"Candy Chiu!" said Candy, blushing, "6th Grade!"

"Whoa! Hey"! said Dipper.

Candy moved closer to Dipper and he didn't know how to take it.

"You're sitting close." Said Dipper.

He noticed Mabel and Grenda giggling, then Carla flew over and closed the curtains on the tow.

"So Dipper, I was wondering, if you wanted to walk around Mystery Mountain with me?" asked Candy.

"Sure… but I mean isn't that the plan?" asked Dipper as he scooted away.

"I mean just you and me… Candy and Dipper." Said Candy.

As Marvelous, Carla and Grenda sat at the table, Marvelous sighed.

"Wendy, is something wrong?" asked Carla.

"Well it's just that this RV is so small that I've been hearing every conversation." Said Marvelous.

"What? Really?" asked Grenda.

"Thanks to the fact that Wendy's a dragon slayer not only is her sense of smell heightened, but also her sense of hearing." Said Carla.

"Oh wow…" said Grenda.

"Have you been hearing the things Stan has planned?" asked Carla, "Is that why you're worried."

"No it's not that…" said Marvelous.

"Then what?" asked Grenda.

"It's nothing…" said Marvelous.

That was when the RV stopped.

"All right road dogs! I got five bucks for whoever can tip the big blue ox." Said Stan pointing to the Paul Bunyan stature with Babe.

"You don't need the money." Said Carla to Marvelous.

"I'll see you inside." Said Candy to Dipper.

Dipper left he RV.

"Hey what's with the mopey mug?" asked Stan.

"Stan you got to help me! Everything you taught me worked too well. I think Candy just asked me out!" said Dipper.

"Hey! Look at my little champion!" said Stan punching Dipper's shoulder.

"What no! I mean Candy's great! She's sweet, smart but I never thought of her like that! This is moving way too fast!" cried Dipper, "I just need to be honest with her and tell her I'm not ready…"

"Don't you see what's happening here." Said Stan, "You're dumb obsession with Wendy is getting in the way of your future. If you want to move on, you have to grab whatever comes your way."

He noticed the woman at the ticket booth.

"Speaking of which." Said Stan.

"But I don't want to lead her on." Said Dipper.

Watch and learn." Said Stan.

He watched as Stan flirted with the ticket booth lady.

"Is everything okay Dipper?" asked Marvelous.

"It's fine… nothing wrong at all…" said Dipper.

"If you want to talk I'll be here for you." Said Marvelous.

Dipper began to panic.

"Not like that! As a friend!" said Marvelous blushing realizing that it could be taken the wrong way.

Stan walked past the two with the woman (named Darlene according to her name tag).

"Dipper take my advice or don't. I clearly know what I'm doing." whispered Stan.

The two watched Stan walk away with Darlene. With him pointing at her with Dipper.

Sometime later Mabel, Grenda, Marvelous and Carla all watched them enter "Mummy Town USA".

"I cant' believe this is really happening! A first date!" said Mabel, "I wonder what they'll name the baby."

"When I have a baby, it will be named Grenda 2: The Sequel." Said Grenda.

"You would make a good mother." Said Mabel.

"That's a terrible name." Carla muttered under her breath.

Marvelous on the other hand was quiet.

Meanwhile in the Mummy Museum. Dipper and Candy were sitting on a bench, Dipper stared a banner that read "New Mummies Daily."

"This place is so enchanting." Said Candy.

"Sort of confused by the phrase "New mummies daily" though. I mean how does that even work?" asked Dipper.

"This mountain is full of mysteries. Like why my head falling on your shoulder." Said Candy playing her head on his shoulder.

"Uh… yeah, all part of the plan…" said Dipper, "This is all part of the plan and stuff."

However that was when he saw the girl from the corn maze (the very same place they left Soos).

"Oh! Dipper! Hey!" said the girl.

"Corn maze girl!" gasped Dipper.

"I was wondering when you would call." Said "corn maze girl" as she sat next opt Dipper.

"Dipper who's this?" asked Candy.

"Nobody! I mean somebody…" said Dipper.

"Dipper!" called out a voice.

It was Emma Sue.

"I didn't recognize you right-side up, you'll never guess where my mom gave birth." Said Emma Sue, "Hey who are these girls?"

That was when the girl he met at Log Land showed up.

"Dipper?" asked the log land girl, "Why haven't you called? Did our romantic log ride mean nothing?"

"I cant' belie it!" said Candy, "You agreed to go on a date with me and you're seeing all these other girls?"

"Well answer us! Which one of do you like!" said the corn maze girl.

"I… I… I like you all… I mean none of you… I mean…" said Dipper pancaking and pushing hi hat over his face, "I mean I was only learning how to talk to girls."

The other girls walked away in disgust. Dipper turned to Candy who was rubbing tears out of her eyes.

"Natsu Pines." She said, "I thought you were a nice guy, but I guess you only care about yourself."

She put her glasses on and walked away.

"Candy! Wait…" said Dipper, "I messed up and I have to find Stan."

Meanwhile with Stan on his date.

"Are you sure you want to go this deep into the forest?" asked Darlene, "It's so scary…"

"Don't worry toots" said Stan putting his arm around her, "That spider people stuff is just urban legend. I cant' believe people fall for it."

"You're brave." Said Darlene.

"What can I say? I'm a real catch." Said Stan.

"Yes…" said Darlene as her eye turned black and her voice distorted, "The catch of the day…"

Indeed Stan was in danger, but it took him a few minutes to realize it.

"Did your contacts fall our?" asked Stan who then began to scream.

Meanwhile Dipper, went over to the information desk.

"Uh, have you seen an old guy around here? Big ears? Orange nose, a real know-it-all." Said Dipper.

The guy at the booth pointed to a nearby stature of Fire Restaurant Raccoon.

"Ah! Ah! Ah! Fire Retardant Raccoon says: Don't hug forest fires." Said the stature.

Although one would have to wonder who would be stupid enoguh to do that.

Dipper sighed.

"Stan where are you! I need your advice." muttered Dipper.

That was when his Walkie-Talkie turned on.

"Grunkle Stan?" asked Dipper.

"Hey buddy boy, so remember when were talking about my technique. Well sometimes it may lead to some unexpected consciences." Said Stan over the walkie-talkie.

"Yeah, you can say that again." Sid Dipper, "Where are you."

"The good news is I solved the mystery of Oregon's mummies." Said Stan on the other.

Stan was currently in a spider web cocoon and had the Walkie-talkie wedged between his neck and head.

"The bad news is I'm about to become one…" said Stan, "Turns out Darlene is one of those spider people. But beyond that the date's been going okay."

Back with Dipper.

"Wait. Wait. Wait. Darlene's a spider person?" asked Dipper, "How is that possible."

"I don't know… one minute we're having the perfect date and the next she's growing extra legs and encasing me in webbing." Said Stan, "Also isn't it was little hypocritical for to be saying something like… I mean you are a wizard."

"You couldn't tell she was a spider." Sighed Dipper.

"I was blinded by flattery… and also the acid she sprayed in my face." Said Stan, "I'm up in the cave on Widow's Peak."

"Alright, I'm going to get find you." Said Dipper, "Stay put."

"You got it…" Stan said sarcastically.

However for Stan, Darlene (with her lower body as a spider) returned and took the walkie-talkie with her webbing.

"Trying to escape?" she said.

"You tricked me! I'm 80 percent certain you're not in love with me at all." Said Stan.

"Oh men fall for everything." Said Darlene, "You're so funny, great story, I love a man with shoulder hair. "

"You didn't mean the thing about the shoulder hair!" yelled Stan.

"Tell me Stan, before I transformed, who did you think was in charge?" she asked, "I'm a master pick up artist, sorry toots. This time you're getting used for your body. Which to my weird specifics is food. Now excuse me while I change into something more horrifying."

She used her spider legs to pull away the skin around her mouth. She remembered her skin revealing a full spider form underneath.

"I wonder what beverage goes with a vintage 70 year old something." Said Darlene, "Be right back."

"Come on Dipper, where are you." Said Stan.

"I feel like such a fool." Cried Candy.

"There, there…" said Grenda, "Let my calming voice soothe you."

"I don't think it's really his fault though." Said Marvelous.

"What makes you say that?" asked Mabel.

"Well… Stan's been giving him tips on how to pick up girls so he could over Wendy." Said Marvelous.

"Seriously…" said Carla.

"How do you now that?" asked Candy.

"Her super dragon hearing!" said Grenda remember the conversation from earlier.

"So that's what you over heard." Said Carla.

"But still! Dipper made that choice!" said Mabel, "He still went on the date with Candy."

Marvelous didn't respond.

Dipper ran towards them.

"Girls! There you are!" said Dipper.

"Betrayer!" yelled Mabel.

"Wait… we should really talk this out…" said Marvelous.

"I need your help!" said Dipper.

"For some kind of sick jealousy trap?" asked Candy.

"What has Stan been telling you this time?" asked Mabel.

"Wait… how did you know about Stan." Said Dipper.

"I've been over hearing all of your conversations in the RV." Said Marvelous.

"Oh…" said Dipper remembering that fact about Dragon Slayers, "Look. I'm sorry for everything! But Stan's in trouble! You can totally kill me later. But now he needs us! I'll explain on the way."

They all headed to the cave.

"Please… I know I don't belie in you. If you're really up there or not. But if you are… please save me Paul Bunyan." Said Stan.

"Mr. Pines!" yelled Grenda.

"Whoa! Did that really work?" asked Stan.

He saw the kids run towards him with Grenda taking him down.

"Quick before the rest of the venom sets in!" said Stan.

"You'll be fine." Said Carla.

They all got the rest of the webbing of him and they ran out of the cave.

They headed towards the sky tram.

"The sky tram! Everybody on! I have a plan!" said Candy.

They got on the sky tram.

"Yes!" cheered Mabel.

"Ride like the wind Sky Tram!" said Stan.

Turns out the ride was very slow.

"Welcome to Trambeince. The world's slowest treetop tram ride. Enjoys the sites at 0.1 miles per hour." Said a recoding.

"Looks like we have to plan out the fight." Said Dipper making Mabel and Marvelous nod.

The three started planning for the fight.

However Candy was quiet as if she was planning something.

That was when Darlene in full spider form showed up and started to wrap the tram in web.

"I'm sure I can burn the web off." Said Dipper, "And hopefully not cause a forest fire…"

"You don't have to…" said Candy, "The sky tram has an emergency drop switch and right below us is Oregon's largest Paul Bunyan Stature. And Old Reliable goes off in 5… 4…" counted Candy.

"Candy wait! We can fight her!" said Dipper.

"Listen to the wizards!" said Stan.

"Now!" called out Candy.

The tram disconnected from the line, sending both the tram and Darlene down to the ground.

Thankfully the area's geyser, Old Reliable shot up, pushing the tram into the air. It rolled around and bouncing down the mountain.

Darleen's web severed sending her to the ground and beneath the Paul Bunyan stature. However it's foot stepped on her.

"My only weakness a giant boot." Said Darlene, "A giant news paper or a giant cup would have worked too."

"Is everyone okay?" asked Marvelous.

"Heal later." Said Carla.

"Kid that was ingenious." Said Stan, "How did you know that would work?"

"Useless travel pamphlets." Said Candy.

"Stany! I'm so sorry, I don't know what came over." Said Darleen as she put her human face back on.

"What seriously…" said Stan, "After all these things? What do you take me for an amnesiac?"

Before Darlene could say anything more.

"You know… you made a mistake going after someone who knows wizards." Said Dipper.

"What?" asked Darlene.

"All right! Together!" said Dipper.

Marvelous nodded.

"Solid Script: Storm!" called out Dipper.

The word storm appeared and quickly turned into a tornado.

"Sky Dragon Roar!"

Marvelous breathed out a tornado.

The two combined and hit Darlene sending her flying away (and completely knocking over the that stature)

"Let's hope that Spider doesn't go back up the spout." Said Mabel.

They all looked at Mabel.

"It was the best I could come up with." Said Mabel with a shrug.

They headed back to the RV.

Dipper sighed and rubbed the numbers he had gathered off his arms.

"All right kid, I have something to admit. I'm no expert on women. Truth is I discovered once and slapped more times I can count." Said Stan, "Confidence can buy you a lot. But at the end of the day pick up artists get their heads bitten off. When it comes to women I'm a failure."

"Hey, we're both failures. You know even if your dating tips. I actually haven't thought about Wendy all day." Said Dipper.

"Well the Wendy that's not here." Said Stan.

"Plus you did teach me to be more confident." Said Dipper, "I guess I just need to learn how to use that for good."

He walked over to Candy who was looking out the window.

"Hey I found a pamphlet you haven't read yet." Said Dipper.

He handed one called "A loser's attempt at an apology" drowned by him.

She read through it.

"It's okay Dipper, the open road makes people do crazy things." Said Candy, "Besides after seeing you take out that spider I realized that you might be out of my league. "

"Yeah… wait… what…" said Dipper.

"I'm kidding." Joked Candy, "It's probably be best if we're better as friends."

"Yeah, friends." Said Dipper.

The two shook hands.

They arrived back in Gravity Falls.

"You know I kind of feel bad about sabotaging the tourist traps." Said Dipper.

"Hey everybody love my pranks." Said Stan, "Everything will be all right and I doubt your mom was right about anything."

They arrived back at the shack.

Where there was an interesting fight going on.

Laxus zapped a guy in a corn suit.

Jellal used some sort of staff on the guy from upside down town, which caused him to collapse.

Erza meanwhile was in an testing fight with Grandma Sweetkins who was wielding giant knitting needles and Erza was blocking with a pair of swords.

"Eh… reminds me of 14 years ago you young'un!" said Grandma Sweetkins.

"Don't you dare mention that!" yelled Erza pushing her back.

She began to attack with her swords.

"So should we help her?" asked Dipper.

"She'll never forgive any of us if we do." Said Stan.

"Hey!" said Jellal.

"Hey… where's Soos…" said Laxus.

"Wait… isn't he…" said Stan, then he realized, "Where is Soos!"

Soos was still lost in the corn maze, but thankfully he did mange to get home thanks to incredible journey with the help of a dog and a cat…

Also Dipper learned confidence, which hopefully he'll be able to use for good in the future.

Next Time: There's a ghost haunting the Northwest Mansion, right when they're supposed to host a party! Who they gonna call? Dipper! As they can't call the guild. Will Dipper bust the ghost with Carla and Pacifica help? Or will he find out the horrible truth of the haunting? Find out next time!

A/N: Yes, I will say I do kind of support CanDip (seriously... they would be a great couple!), but it's not my personal fave ship with Dipper. Also sinking it now Dipper and Wendy Marvell won't get together, they're just friends.