Chapter 10: Illumination


The moment Suliman pulled Howl's heart from his body and stared at it with her hungry eyes, Sophie knew she wouldn't sleep much that night.

She jolted awake and sat up, immediately rubbing her eyes and slapping her face. She didn't want to sleep if that's all her mind could conjure up. It tore her to pieces just watching even a fictional version of Suliman terrorizing Howl.

As her eyes adjusted, Sophie noticed that it was still dark outside. The light from the moon winked through the glass doors into Sophie's room, though it's mute luminance wasn't enough to combat the shadows of the night. The darkness always took over until the sun rose, conquering the daytime.

Sophie gave up all hope of getting sleep, so she pulled off the heavy quilt and twisted her legs to hang off the side of the bed. She sucked in a long, relaxed inhale through her mouth, the fear of the nightmare still haunting her thoughts.

The nightmarish dream sent goosebumps throughout her entire body every time she awoke. Though only imagination, she feared it as though it were reality. If Suliman took the most vulnerable part of Howl, there was no telling how far she would go. Sophie was there to protect Howl; she was always there to protect him no matter what the cost.

Now, she had let the sorceress take the advantage; and if anything were to happen to Howl by Suliman's hands, there would be no one to blame but herself.

Sophie stood up on the plush carpet and paced around the room. She refused to allow her eyes to rest - that would merely grant the nightmare permission to antagonize her once more. It was better if she stayed awake. She already knew the rest of her life would be an endless nightmare, so she wanted just one more night to be free.

Her eyes drooped low, though, and her mind ached for the natural slumber that would give her energy throughout the day. Even still, Sophie was willing to challenge her physical instincts with her mental.

She knelt by the fireplace, the smoke leisurely rising from the ashes. She took the last two logs and dropped them on the pile of ashes, causing the tiny pieces of molten wood to crackle and spark again, like tiny, exploding fireworks. Sophie held her knees into her chest, watching as the fire strengthened.

Sophie smiled as she thought of Calcifer. She missed him greatly and his sarcastic comments about literally everything. There was a peculiar spark inside of him that just warmed her heart, more than his flames could offer. He was a passionate creature.

Calcifer was always the one who helped her when Howl was away; for a fire demon, he took care of more household chores than Markl did as a human magician child. Though she couldn't be upset by the boy wanting to enjoy his childhood, sometimes she felt like Calcifer was the only one who paid attention to her needs. Most of the time, he understood her better than Howl. He was truly her best friend.

Sophie rested her chin on her knees. She missed the castle - she missed telling Markl to stop playing with magic and the flower shop and Calcifer's sarcastic jokes and the Witch of the Wastes always flirting with Howl even though she had no chance with him. But most of all, she missed the presence of true love.

Her beautiful wizard. Even through all the lies and deceit between them, nothing stopped her from loving him. Now, that love was tainted and crumbling right before her very eyes. Everything she had once known was gone. What haunted her the most was the unknown - there was no way to be sure she would see them ever again.

She buried her head between her knees and let the tears stream like an endless river. Since she hadn't cried in so long, all the tears she held back were liberating themselves and pouring through her eyes. It was always her responsibility to be the strong one, whether it was for her sisters or Markl or Howl. Now, there was no one to comfort her or take away the pain when she needed a companion.

She couldn't see how things could be any worse than this upcoming tragedy.

"Wow, what did she do to make you cry like that?"

Sophie sniffled and looked up. She was certain all the doors were locked, and no one besides Suliman, Justin, or a select few guards were allowed entrance. She was indeed alone in the room – save for a talking fire demon.

"Ca-Calcifer?" Sophie crawled closer to the fire, and sure enough her fire demon friend burned brightly in the fireplace. She couldn't help but smile through the tears. "Oh, Calcifer. If you weren't a fire demon, I think I would hug you right about now."

He laughed lightly. "I know, Sophie." Calcifer dropped his brief excitement. "What has Suliman done to you? I haven't seen you cry in ages."

Sophie sat with her knees propped up, looking away from his gaze. He was the only one she'd entrusted with any information about Justin over the last year. She was desperate for a soul to listen, yet terrified to admit the truth.

Sophie curled her short hair behind her ear, still refusing to look him in the eye. "I don't know if I should say. Although, you'll all find out eventually tomorrow."

Calcifer crossed his arms over the logs. "Sophie, if we're going to help you, you need to tell me what's going on."

She lifted her head and her heart stopped for a moment. "We?"

"Howl, Markl, and Kenta are doing everything they can to bring you back home. Howl loves you, Sophie. You know that, right?"

Sophie shrugged. "I don't know if I have faith in my own judgment anymore. I've trusted the wrong people and believed in far too many lies for a long time."

"Do you mean Howl or Justin?" Sophie turned to him, but his eyes lowered. "I... I told Howl about the proposals. I didn't... I just couldn't hide it anymore. He deserved to know the truth."

Sophie widened her eyes in shock. Howl knew. He knew of the visits to the flower shop and the countless proposals - everything. With her secret now unveiled, he was aware of all the lies.

Though they hardly had any interactions before or after the excursion that saved Justin's life, Howl was never fond of Prince Justin. Anytime the name of such royalty was slightly mentioned, Howl always grew a little colder and less compassionate. Over time, Sophie began to understand why Howl was more cautious of anything having to do with the Royal Family.

Her heart raced faster and faster, but after a few deep breaths, she relaxed. "You did the right thing. I should have told him the first time; maybe then I wouldn't be stuck here."

"Sophie." She turned to Calcifer, his tone serious. "Why are you in the Palace?"

It was time. Sophie needed to tell someone or the loneliness would consume her. She couldn't be alone; not now. Not when she needed her friends and family the most.

The tears rolled down her cheeks and she cupped her face, letting the words fall out. "I'm... marrying Justin in the morning."

Calcifer was speechless. He assumed leverage or ransom to force Howl to the extreme. But to marry Prince Justin? After all the times Sophie denied him and his love, it came down to a forced marriage? He used to think the Prince was just an optimistic man with a soft heart of gold. Shocking to the demon, Justin was apparently the same kind of ruthless as Suliman to force Sophie into marriage.

Calcifer's flames boiled like an evening sunset. "What a piece of scum. He should be ashamed of himself for going so low. How did he coerce you into this?"

She revealed her tear-stricken cheeks, the red in her eyes so painful Calcifer would have cried if he had the ability. "Suliman killed my sister and pretended to be her to make it look like Justin had moved on, but it was only a trap to get me to marry him."

"Lettie is dead?" Calcifer dropped his jaw. He cared for Lettie. Though they were unable to have any real conversation for fear of her discovering Sophie's magical lifestyle, he still heard enough from her to feel a sense of familial love for the girl. He didn't think Suliman would go to such lengths for an arranged marriage.

Which begged the question in his mind of how long Madame Suliman had been tricking them, but he assumed Sophie didn't want to continue talking about such tragic news.

"We'll get you out, Soph." Calcifer said, his voice determined. "Don't worry, Howl and Kenta will be here soon. I'll let them know–"

"No, Calcifer." The fire demon looked at her with worrisome eyes; she already looked defeated. "You can't let Howl know about this. I'd rather him not know until it's done."

"But Sophie, we can save you, we'll get you out. You don't have to–"

"I can't leave." Sophie pleaded with him, wiping her eyes clean. "If I don't marry Justin, Suliman will arrest Howl for murdering my sister. She plans on giving him the death sentence. He has to stay as far away from here as possible."

Calcifer's flames grew larger and redder. "She can't do that. Howl would never kill anyone close to you, especially your sister."

"She can do whatever she wants." Sophie said in anguish. "She's the most powerful sorceress on the continent - probably the entire world. No one other than Howl has ever dared to stand up against her and walk away unscarred."

"Sophie, you'll hurt him more than you can imagine by marrying Justin – of all people, the Prince is the one person he despises the most."

"But he'll get better." Sophie said, trying to smile. "If he's rotting in a jail cell, he'll never forgive me and his dark side will take over. If he's dead there's no way to reverse it. He'll be better off if I'm not in the picture."

"His dark side already came out." Sophie widened her eyes. She hadn't seen Howl release the demon inside of him since the day they stopped the war. And, with his heart back, she hadn't seen its true power. He had been able to control his anger over the small things, but nothing had pushed him over the limit.

"How? What happened?"

"Tonight, after I told him Justin proposed to you." Sophie covered her mouth. "You may not think Howl loves you the way you love him, but he does. He loves you more than anyone in the world, and just hearing that someone wanted to marry you drove him over the edge. How do you think he'll react when he sees the papers tomorrow talking about the happiest new royal couple?"

Sophie curled up once more and cried into her knees, hoping this was just a bad dream. She begged for it to go away like the other dreams and nightmares that tortured her, but it was no use. Whatever she decided, Howl would hurt.

Calcifer sighed. "We're going to do everything we can to stop this wedding. I promise."

"And if Suliman gets to Howl first?" Sophie asked. She searched Calcifer for a hopeful answer, but even a charismatic demon like himself couldn't hide his doubt.

Calcifer lowered his gaze. "First, let's focus on getting you out of the Palace. Then, we'll worry about Howl."

Sophie nodded. She wasn't sure if they could even get her out of the Palace, but she felt a sense of relief knowing her family would go this far to aid her. Though she feared Suliman, she believed in the love of her family more.

"I have to go back and help Markl protect the castle, but don't lose hope. We're not leaving you." Sophie smiled and nodded, grateful to have a family willing to go to such lengths to save her from these mistakes.

"Thank you, Calcifer. I love you so much." Sophie leaned closer to the fire and kissed him softly, a slight trickle of fire burning her lip. Calcifer smiled, then the demon slowly faded away until eventually, the fire returned to its inanimate state.

Sophie lay down on the carpet, resting near the fire. Howl released his dark side, something he had been able to conceal for some time. She didn't believe that something as petty as love would be his breaking point. Howl hadn't been that person before.

When did he change? When did he start using his heart to express real love for her? There was never a day she questioned her love, yet constantly she wondered when Howl would shield himself from their promise. With his constant missions and consistent disappearance, she always thought his priorities were elsewhere.

How did love become his undoing?

After everything he had done, after all the pain he had caused her, she would still do anything to keep him safe and alive - even if it meant marrying his greatest rival.


I loved that little visit with Calcifer, I thought it was a perfect way for him and Sophie to be able to talk while she was trapped in the Palace. Now her only hope is that Howl can somehow break her out of there without finding out about this arranged marriage... whelp, wishful thinking I guess!