"Watch out!" Padme cried as Anakin crashed face-first into the wall of the ice skating rink for the tenth time. She couldn't help but laugh as he peeled himself from the glass, rubbing his nose which, due to the cold and constant hitting the sides of the rink, had turned a deep red. On most people, it might have been unflattering. On Anakin, it was quite adorable and it made Padme just want to kiss it better.
She refrained, however. "You're not supposed to crash," she teased as she grasped his arm to give him support. Anakin had insisted that he didn't need beginner ice skates, saying that he was sure that he would pick it up quickly. He had sort of gotten the balance down, but he had yet to figure out how to stop or take sharp turns.
It was a few days after the incident with Finn. She had returned to school the following day, much to her parent's chagrin. Other than a few sideways stares from her classmates, for the most part people left her alone and she was able to get her work done. She had thrown herself into her work to keep herself from thinking about it, and when she wasn't working, she was with Anakin. In fact, whenever she felt like she needed him or wanted to see him, he was there practically right when she turned around.
He was unbelievably sweet to her. He was gentle, and he was interested in what she cared about, and yet sometimes when they kissed, she felt a wildness coming from him that she didn't think she could ever contain. There were times, sitting on her couch, kissing him deeply, that she wondered if he wanted more. But he never made a move like that.
That was fine by her. Tonight was their official first date, and she had looked forward to this night, more so than she had ever looked forward to any other date. That day at school, she had hardly paid attention in any of her classes, and rather than work on homework, she had spent her afternoon getting ready. She had torn her entire closet apart looking for the perfect outfit, and had finally settled on a white knit sweater, light blue jeans, and a plaid scarf to tie the look together. She had also spent a long time flat ironing her hair so that it fell in soft waves down her back. It was a relief that the bruise on her cheek had faded enough to be successfully covered by makeup.
Her fretting had caused Mindy quite a bit of entertainment, but Anakin hadn't quite understood it. "You're beautiful no matter what," he'd said. It was very sweet, but he had it easy. His natural curls always looked good, and he already looked good in a dark blue sweater and black jeans. It had taken him probably five minutes to get ready.
It was sort of a relief that he hadn't already mastered ice skating. She was beginning to wonder if he was good at everything he touched. "You're not supposed to be perfect at this," He teased back, but his voice was strained as he glared down at the skates, his eyebrows furrowed, trying to figure it out.
It was just so cute, Padme couldn't resist any longer. She leaned up and kissed his cheek tenderly, startling him into giving her his full attention. As a result, he slipped, and because she was holding him, they both crashed to the ice, her on top of Anakin. She clenched her teeth, waiting to feel pain, but she didn't. Slowly, she let out a breath. "Anakin, are you okay?" She asked, looking down at him.
At first, he looked a little stunned. Then, slowly, a smile spread across his face and he began to laugh heartily. The sound was infectious, and soon Padme was laughing with him. He wrapped his arms around her waist, and she was suddenly reminded of the dream she had where they had rolled through the grass after he had faked being hurt to scare her…and her laughter died. It was just a coincidence, she told herself, but she couldn't make herself believe it fully.
Anakin didn't seem to notice her change in mood. When he finished laughing, he smiled so warmly at her, her heart began to melt. How did he do that? She wondered—one look from him, and she was falling under his spell.
Not that she minded.
"Stop smooching on the ice!" Satine called, causing both Anakin and Padme to look up.
Satine and Ben were together on the ice. Unlike Anakin, it seemed that Ben had some experience on the ice. He glided easily next to Satine. They seemed to be hitting it off—at least, they had slipped into an easy banter—but there was still a physical gap between the couple as they skated. Padme had noticed Satine try to close the gap, but Ben had always widened it again. It was as if Ben were afraid to date women in general. Or maybe he wasn't into women at all.
Still, Ben seemed happy to be there. He approached Padme and Anakin with a smile, holding his hand out to help them up. Padme graciously accepted the hand, but naturally Anakin insisted on getting up on his own.
After a brief struggle, Anakin managed to stand upright, brushing off the excess ice shavings that had covered his clothes. He had a bunch in his hair, but it was still so adorable that Padme didn't bother mentioning it.
"I thought this would be easy for you to pick up," Ben said, his voice light and teasing, but she could see genuine surprise in his eyes. "You're usually good at, well, almost everything." So it wasn't just her that had noticed.
"Almost," Anakin agreed with a sheepish smile, "Except ice skating."
"I don't know how Padme has the patience to put up with it. She's a fantastic skater. She took figure skating lessons in high school. She must really like you to slowly bumble around the rink with you." Satine said, and Padme noticed her casually move closer to Ben. This time, Ben stayed put. She wondered if Anakin would tell her what Ben's deal was with dating later.
"Are you now?" Anakin cast a curious glance at Padme, causing her to blush.
"I haven't done it in a while," She admitted, "And there are a lot of people to witness it if I wipe out." Anakin didn't look quite familiar with the term wipe out, but he seemed to understand the gist of it. Sometimes it was like she was talking to someone who was from another planet, not someone who had lost their memory. But what did she know? She wasn't a doctor.
"I'm sure you'll do fine," Anakin assured her, "Besides, it's not like you can get worse than me." She opened her mouth to assure him that he wasn't the worst skater out there, but he put up a hand to stop her. "At least show us one move." He looked at her with those gorgeous, heart melting eyes of his, and she couldn't resist.
With a sigh, she caved. "Fine, but if I fall and break my arm, I'm blaming you." She was teasing, but she caught the panicked look Anakin got when she said it, and he opened his mouth to stop her.
Too late, she thought as she easily skated away from him. She glided around other skaters who skated around in a giant loop around the large indoor rink. A few experienced skaters were in the center, doing various maneuvers. She heard Anakin call her name, but she pretended like she couldn't hear him. It wasn't like she was going to die.
She picked up speed, her mind reviewing what she had done as a teenager multiple times, and smoothly launched herself into a triple loop.
It felt good to be in the air—it felt as if she were flying. It wasn't quite the same thing as surfing, which was why she had dropped ice skating in favor of surfing, but it still filled her with a rush of adrenaline. But all too soon it was over and she was landing back on the ice. For a split second she lost her balance and she held her hands out and bent her knees, expecting to fall, but she quickly regained her balance and she stood up again, gliding easily back over to her group. "There," she said when she approached, "Now you can't say that I'm too chicken to show you."
Ben narrowed his eyes at the phrase, but when he spoke, he said, "Very well done Padme."
She nodded her head in thanks, but her eyes naturally drifted back to her boyfriend, her stomach doing nervous flips. What would Anakin think? She knew it was silly to worry about what others thought, but she wanted her boyfriend to be proud of her abilities, even the silly, rarely used ones.
He looked relieved, as if he really had been worrying that she would fall and break something, but she could see the look of pride in his gaze as he looked at her. Her heart swelled as he took her hand in his. "Beautiful," He said simply, but just that one word meant the world to her.
"Let's go get some pretzels from the snack bar," Satine suggested after a brief silence, "The soft pretzels here are actually pretty good."
"That sounds like a wonderful idea," Ben said, and if Padme wasn't mistaken, he seemed relieved, as if Anakin's brief moment of affection towards her had made him feel uncomfortable. Surely she was mistaken though—hadn't Ben gone on double dates before? Was he uncomfortable whenever he saw any sort of affection?
Carefully Padme helped Anakin skate back around the rink until they reached the exit. Multiple times Anakin almost slipped face-first onto the ice, but each time he was about to lose his balance, she stopped to make sure that he regained his balance. Once they were off the ice, Anakin practically raced/hobbled (he was trying to race but his awkwardness in his skates prevented him from doing so, and it was quite a comical sight) back to their shoes.
As soon as they had swapped their skates for shoes, Padme and Anakin followed hand in hand after Ben and Satine. Satine still walked close to Ben, and again, Ben didn't move. In fact, as they approached the counter, Padme was pleased to see that Satine casually reached out and intertwined her hand with his.
Ben stiffened, but he didn't move away. After a second, his shoulders relaxed, and he asked Satine if she wanted anything else at the snack bar.
Perhaps he really was just very shy around women.
"You have no idea how much progress that is," Anakin whispered to her.
She looked up at him in surprise. "Is he really that shy?"
"I guess you could say that." Anakin smirked, as if he were in on some private joke that Padme was not privy to.
She glanced over at the couple again. "Well, I'm glad. Satine seems to really like him."
"I wouldn't be surprised," Anakin muttered, and if Padme hadn't been so close, she might not have heard it. "Do you want anything other than the pretzel?" He asked louder before she could ask what he meant by that.
Slowly, she turned her attention away from him to look up at the menu. "Um, maybe a Coke." She said.
"Coming right up." He kissed her cheek, and for a moment she forgot Ben's odd dating behavior and Anakin's possible secrets. She watched him as he stepped forward into the line to order. Seeing that Satine was still holding onto Ben as if letting him go might scare him away, Padme turned to look out the window to the ice rink beyond, watching the few hundred people skate clumsily by.
A young couple with a little blonde girl skated by, the girl's hands in her parents, and she was smiling ear to ear as they skated. A pang of longing filled Padme's heart, and she almost wished…
But that was a dumb wish. She had barely started dating her first boyfriend. She wasn't even ready to start thinking of marriage, let alone children.
Still, looking at the child, she felt like she was missing something important…no, not something, someone….
"Padme?" Anakin's voice brought her back to reality, and she looked at him. She must have had a strange look on her face though, because instantly Anakin became serious. "What's wrong?"
She opened her mouth to tell him that she was fine, but right then an explosion from the ice rink rocked the building, knocking her and Anakin and just about anyone in the building to the ground.
Anakin instinctively tried to throw up a Force shield…however, it only went up around himself. In the split second that he was falling, he launched himself over Padme, shielding her from what he could as a result.
They hit the floor, and he covered her with his body, his teeth gritting as he struggled to maintain the Force field, his arms on either side of her. He felt the searing heat of the blast at his back. He heard people screaming in terror and panic. He expected Padme to be screaming, but she was strangely silent, her body tense, as if she were experienced at waiting out disasters.
Eventually the blast faded, and all Anakin could hear was a familiar ringing in his ear. It was almost as if he were back on the battlefield, but this time when he slowly raised his head, he saw only innocent people struggling to get back up, dirt and blood on their faces.
Once he fought to protect people from this sort of thing. Once he was the cause of this sort of thing.
But he wasn't a soldier anymore. He also wasn't a Sith Lord, terrorizing the Galaxy. So what was his role now?
Help.
Slowly, stiffly, he raised himself up to a kneeling position. "Are you okay, Padme?" He asked, already checking her for injuries. Her hair was tangled, but otherwise she looked fine.
She groaned though as she sat up, rubbing her temple. "I think I bumped my head, but I'm okay, thanks to you." She eyed him, looking for injuries on him. When she found none, she frowned. "How on Earth are you not injured?"
He didn't bother telling her about the weak Force field he had constructed, and instead shrugged his shoulders and helped her stand before surveying the damage.
The blast had come from the ice rink. The window separating the rink from the snack bar had shattered. The ice rink was covered in smoke, and he could dimly make out that most of the ice had completely melted to reveal a cement floor. On the floor, he could see bodies, most of which weren't moving.
He heard Padme gasp from beside him. "Anakin, we have to help." Anakin hesitated, his first instinct to tell her no, that she needed to get herself to safety. But he knew she wouldn't listen to him, and a large part of him agreed—these were innocent people, and until more help arrived, it seemed like they were the only ones able to begin helping these people.
He looked around for Obi-Wan and found him and Satine already up and helping the people who had been knocked over in the snack bar area. "Obi-Wan," he called, forgetting to call him by this world's name for him. Obi-Wan instantly responded without comment however. "Padme and I are going to look for survivors in the rink."
Obi-Wan nodded, his expression serious, calculating, as if he were expecting droids to come bursting through the door at any second. "Be careful, Anakin. We don't know if the building is structurally safe anymore."
"We will be," Anakin assured him before he took Padme's hand and carefully led her into the rink, stepping over shards of glass.
"Do you think this was an intentional act?" Padme asked as they gingerly stepped over the collapsed rink wall.
"It's very likely," Anakin responded truthfully, already going into General-mode. His mind was sorting everything that needed to be done—the dead needed to be separated from the injured, the severely injured needed to be tended to first, the least injured needed to be led out of the rink….
"But why?" She asked, "I mean there isn't really a good reason for terror, but what is the purpose of bombing an ice skating rink?"
"Sometimes," Anakin said absently, not realizing that he wasn't filtering the information coming out of his mouth, "It just serves as a demonstration."
Padme paused, and Anakin realized that he'd said something that, although true, was something that was rather dark, a side that this Padme was not accustomed to. Before she could ask questions, Anakin said, "I'm going to start moving the bodies. Find anyone who is able to walk and lead them out of the rink."
He didn't wait for her to acknowledge what he'd said before he began to act, letting go of her hand to start sorting.
He didn't know how long he worked. His body went into auto-pilot, and he detached himself emotionally as he moved the bodies of women, men, teenagers, and even children into a line at the edge of the rink after confirming that there was indeed no pulse. Every once in a while he stopped to check on Padme, expecting to find her breaking down like any other normal civilian would in a situation like that. Instead he found her comforting those who were too injured to be moved, and leading others with confidence out of the rink to safety. She didn't even complain when one person left a large stain of blood on her white sweater that he knew she loved.
Watching her work, it was almost like he was watching his Padme work in his galaxy—she too would have handled the situation calmly, and would have led instead of waited around to be told how she could help.
Pride swelled within him. That was the woman he loved.
"Anakin!" Obi-Wan called, and Anakin stopped what he was doing to slowly make his way over to his master. Obi-Wan looked at Anakin grimly, but he didn't look injured at all. Anakin was sure that Obi-Wan had an easier time throwing a Force shield around he and Satine.
Instead of getting frustrated like he wanted to, Anakin focused on the task at hand. "What is it?"
"I broke into the security room," Obi-Wan said.
"Oh, turning to a life of crime now, are we?" Anakin blurted out, just as he would have done had this been a battlefield and he were fighting side by side with Obi-Wan.
Obi-Wan blinked in surprise, but slowly a small smile crept across his lips. "Be that as it may, I found security footage confirming that this was an intentional bombing."
"Of course," Anakin agreed. "Did you find anything that might lead us to who the bomber might be?"
Obi-Wan hesitated, as if he were reconsidering telling Anakin the information. "You're not going to like it."
Instantly Anakin tensed. "Palpatine?"
"No," Obi-Wan said, "That would give us easy proof for the authorities. But the bomber may be working for him, considering he has before."
Anakin's heart sank. "Count Dooku?"
"No." Obi-Wan took a deep breath, and Anakin could see that Obi-Wan was deeply troubled. "Darth Maul."
Anakin froze. Darth Maul. Darth Maul was in this world? "How can you tell?" He asked through numb lips. Yoda didn't look like his other self in Anakin's galaxy—how would Darth Maul look in this world?
"He tattooed those same markings on every visible part of his body." Obi-Wan said grimly. "It could be that he's after me and Satine. I was his primary enemy in our galaxy, and if he remembers his past self, he could be attacking us…"
"He would have done it directly." Anakin interrupted. "Darth Maul, at the end of his life, would have taken you on directly, regardless of who was around. He wouldn't have done something so simple as planting a bomb unless he were ordered to…" Anakin knew that he was jumping to conclusions, but very quickly he was losing control of himself. He whirled around and, ignoring Obi-Wan as he called for him, rushed back to Padme.
She was helping a little girl out of the rink when Anakin reached her. "Padme." He said, his voice rough and desperate even to his own ears. His whole body was shaking.
Padme took one look at him and quickly ushered the little girl to safety before turning her attention back on him. "What's wrong?" She asked.
He didn't answer, not verbally, at least. Instead, he grabbed her hand and began to lead her to the locker room. "Anakin?" Padme called, trying to get his attention. "What's going on? I thought we were…"
"We've done all we can." Anakin cut her off. He could hear the fear in his voice, the fear of losing Padme to a mad man controlled by a bigger, meaner mad man. "We have to get out of here." He reached their locker and opened it, grabbing the keys to Obi-Wan's truck before he began dragging Padme out.
"We can't just leave," Padme began to insist, "We have to stay and at least talk to the police about…"
Anakin stopped and whirled, grabbing Padme firmly by both shoulders, looking into her beautiful brown eyes that were still full of life. "We have to leave. NOW."
He wasn't in control. Distantly, he knew that. He wasn't quite as far gone as going back into Darth Vader mode, but he was…well, the only time he was this desperate was when he had raced across Tatooine to save his kidnapped mother.
And look how that turned out.
Padme must have seen something in his eyes, something that made her pause, rethinking her strategy to talk sense into him. "Okay." she finally said, "Let's go."
Anakin didn't wait for anyone else to try to stop him. He didn't wait to collect Obi-Wan and Satine. At the moment, he was so focused on getting Padme to safety, that he didn't even care that he was leaving the two of them behind in Obi-Wan's truck.
All he knew, all he cared about, was that he had to get Padme far away from here, somewhere she would be safe forever.
He would not lose her again.
"Where are you taking us?" Padme asked for about the thousandth time. They were heading, from what she could tell, out of the city, and from the way Anakin gripped Obi-Wan's truck wheel with a white-knuckled grip, she was beginning to become very worried. At first she had gone along with him because she could see that something had unbalanced Anakin, and she thought that he needed some air. But now they were leaving the city limits and she was beginning to wonder if he'd completely lost it. He had handled those bodies so calmly, she had thought that he was impressive in his ability to be so calm in the face of danger. But now…
She supposed everyone had their breaking point. Anakin had clearly reached his.
"Somewhere safe." He had responded with this every time she asked where he was taking her. It was beginning to get frustrating.
"We can't just abandon everything." Technically, they could, but they would run out of money and her parents would worry and…well, there were a lot of reasons why they couldn't just abandon everything and run away. But Anakin did not seem like he was in a reasonable mood.
"I have to make sure you're safe, Padme." His voice…it was so broken. And when she looked at his eyes, there was a desperate pleading there that made Padme wonder if Anakin had lost something or someone important to him in his past. Did he remember it? Or was it perhaps his body acting on the trauma of the past event?
"I am safe." She tried to use a reasonable voice, but it didn't seem to be getting through to him. Perhaps a firm tone would work. "Anakin Skywalker. Turn this car around and take me home. NOW."
That did snap him out of it…at least his panicked state. Instead of listening, however, he snapped at her. "You do not order me around! I'm done with being ordered! I can't lose you again! You may be a senator…"
"A what?" Padme interrupted: she could feel a headache coming on. Anakin's eyes were wide, wild, and she was really starting to get scared, not only for her safety, but his as well. "Anakin you're talking nonsense. Please at least pull the car over…"
"NO."
He wasn't listening. Fine. Anakin was a man of action. Maybe action would work.
She unlocked her passenger door and threw it open, the wind whipping her hair in her face as she unbuckled her seat belt. She looked uneasily at the road speeding past her, but she didn't have to go further with her crazy, ambitious bluff, because a split second later, Anakin took the bait.
"WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" Anakin yelled as he swerved the car to the side of the road, throwing the breaks on, but not hard enough to cause her to lose her balance in her seat. As soon as he pulled to a stop, Padme jumped out of the truck and moved away from it. She heard Anakin get out as well, slamming the door behind him. "Are you CRAZY?" He was yelling, and it might have scared her, but at that point she couldn't find it in herself to be scared of him, but rather scared for him.
She whirled around to face him. "I'm not getting back in that truck until we talk this through." Her voice was firm, leaving no room for negotiation. It was the same voice she used in the court room, and yet she saw familiarity flash across Anakin's face, as if he'd heard her use that voice before. That wasn't possible, however. He hadn't ever been to one of her classes where she practiced using it.
"There's nothing to talk about." He said through clenched teeth, but she could see that he was starting to go on the defense. Yeah, he could tell that she wasn't just going to go with whatever he wanted to do.
"Yes there is." She motioned to the truck. "Where are you taking us?"
"Somewhere safe."
"Not good enough!" She barked, "Do you even know where we're going? Are we driving around at random until you decide to calm down?!"
Anakin was silent for a moment, and grudgingly he finally replied, "No."
"Then we aren't exactly safe, are we? We could get lost and if we got hurt, no one would know where to find us. This behavior isn't going to protect either one of us, so calm down and talk to me!" She stepped forward. "Does this have something to do with your past? Do you remember something that makes you afraid you're going to lose me somehow?"
Anakin opened his mouth to reply, then closed it, as if he were at a loss for words. "I can't…I'm not ready to talk about this." He finally said, and his voice…his eyes…it was as if he had seen things. Things that were so horrible, she could never fully comprehend the evilness of it. But it was more than just that. She saw a need to be free of those horrors, whether they were imagined or real, and she realized that despite his strength, despite the confidence that he often exuded, he was still very, very lost in this world.
But he wasn't done talking. Even as cars zipped by, she could still hear his voice, low and vulnerable and desperate. "I'm afraid." He admitted, looking down. "I'm afraid that I'm going to lose everyone I care about. I'm afraid that I'm not going to be able to keep the promises I've made. Most of all, I'm afraid that I'm going to lose you before I get the chance to prove to you that things will be different. I want so badly to let go of that fear, but I just…can't."
She sensed there was something else that he wasn't saying, something so huge, that it would possibly change her world. But she could also see that just telling her that information was hard enough for him. She let out a sigh and closed the distance between them, looping her arms around him. He tensed for a moment, but he eventually relaxed and wrapped his arms around her. Being in his arms, she felt as if nothing could ever hurt her, and yet she could still feel that insecurity wrapped around him like an inescapable blanket.
"I can't promise that you'll never lose me." She had to be honest with him. If there was anything you learned in the movies, it was that you never promised the impossible. "But you also can't promise that I won't lose you."
She pulled away from him just enough to look up into his eyes. He still looked so scared, so unsure. "There's a saying that says that if you love something, let it go. If it was meant to be, it will come back to you. I know that sounds like a really cheesy Hallmark card, and to be honest I probably saw it on one, but I do think that there is such a thing as fate. Regardless of what our fate will be, Anakin Skywalker, I think that you and I were meant to meet." She took a deep breath. "You need to let go of your fear of losing me. I know it's hard. But loss is a part of life, and," She touched his chest with her hand. "If we're meant to be, you need to trust that I will always come back to you."
"And if you died?" Anakin's voice cracked.
She reached up and took his face in her hands, her eyes holding his. They were probably a strange sight on the side of the road, and she was glad that it was dark outside. "Then I will find you again in the next life, even if I need to rip open the gates of Hell to do so."
He still looked unsure, and slowly she reached up and kissed him tenderly. He deepened the kiss, as if he were afraid she would disappear. When they broke apart, both of them gasping for air, he seemed much more in control. Still, he did not let her go. "Can we go home now?" She whispered.
He looked back at the truck, as if deciding to force her back in there to take her someplace else, but finally he nodded. "Let's go home." He said.
This was a fun chapter to write. If it hadn't been the last week of the semester, and I wasn't driving across the country, I would have had this uploaded sooner. However, those things did happen. But the semester is done, I've got a few weeks of vacation, and I'm safely at my destination! YAY!
Speaking of the last week, my students saw the new Star Wars trailer, and they told me they wanted to see it. They've spent the entire semester making fun of me for having a Star Wars-themed classroom, but now all of a sudden they want to see it. I pointed out that they won't understand anything since they haven't seen the original movies. So the last two days of school, since grades were done on their part, I let them watch the original movies (yes, all episodes 4-6). Now they love Star Wars! Let's hope they love their work when they get back from break...
I haven't seen the new movie yet. My parents got tickets for Christmas Day. So I'm off of Facebook until then, which is hard since I'm sort of a Facebook addict, but I REALLY don't want spoilers. So no spoilers. I also REALLY want to listen to the new soundtrack by John Williams, but I can't because...spoilers. I normally don't care, but...this is Star Wars. It's not the same as other movies.
I got a question about what happens to the Force Ghosts for Obi-Wan and Anakin in the original galaxy. When I watched the end of Episode 6 (again, I haven't seen Episode 7, so I could totally be wrong), I got the impression that Luke is a full Jedi and no longer really needs the Force ghosts. Hence, the Force Ghosts were given their second chance at life, and put into this world...at least in this story.
Anyhow. Review! Next chapter is a SUPER MAJOR CHAPTER...actually for the next few chapters, they're all pretty major. So get ready for feels.
Love,
Sarah
