WARNING: This chapter is combined with real experiences that are...intense, to say the least. If you get squeamish reading birth scenes...skimming is the best option. It is by no means graphic, but I feel like you should know going in.
Have fun reading!
6 months later…
Anakin startled awake. He lay at the edge of their king size bed, his heavily pregnant wife taking up most of the space. He could sense that she was awake, and due to her uncomfortable shifting, he realized, with little surprise, that this was the reason why he'd woken up. It had become almost a nightly ritual—he would wake up because of Padme's shifting, he would use the Force to try and calm the twins inside of her or rub her low back to ease her backache, and then attempt to fall back asleep, wrapping one arm around her belly, sliding one thigh between hers as a cushion, and trying to help all of them to get their much needed rest.
"The twins are causing problems again." Padme said, having already figured that she'd woken her husband up. Her voice was apologetic, as it always was. She had suggested that he sleep in Galen's room, since the boy was back in Nepal and the bed was going unused. Anakin refused, wanting to be close to his wife, but there had been some nights when he had had to take her up on her offer when he'd had exams for school the next day or a busy day at the factory scheduled, and he'd needed a full night's sleep.
Tonight, he decided, would not be one of those nights.
"It's fine, Sweetie. Tomorrow is Saturday: We don't have classes or work to worry about." He rolled over, spooned up against her back, dropped a loving kiss on her shoulder, and put a comforting hand on her belly, rubbing soothing circles to try and quiet the twins down. For whatever reason, this time she had grown much faster and bigger than she had before in her second and third trimesters, much to her discomfort and annoyance. Even if she hadn't, it was extremely obvious this time that she was carrying twins due to the very powerful Force-signatures both of them were emitting.
He and Obi-Wan had discussed these differences at great length. Obi-Wan had finally theorized that perhaps the children, being as sensitive to the Force as they were, had recognized that the situations their parents lived in were vastly different than before in their old galaxy. Before, the need to hide her pregnancy was a constant concern for Padme, and had the Jedi sensed the twins' Force signatures, it would not have taken the Jedi Council long to figure out exactly who the father was.
Now, Padme's only stress, besides getting to class on time (which was a challenge, as slow as her gait was with the heavy bulk of a twin gestation) and studying for the BAR exam, was from the aches and pains of her pregnancy...the near constant backache, the swollen hands and feet (her feet had grown 2 shoe sizes), constantly having to go to the bathroom, and even having difficulty breathing at times (when the twins decided to use her lungs for a trampoline). Anakin and Obi-Wan were obviously allowing romantic relationships in the Jedi Order now, so there was no reason to hide a Force presence.
Anakin wasn't sure he fully bought into that explanation, but it was the only one offered thus far, so he reluctantly accepted it. At the moment, he could feel both of the children kicking their mother like crazy underneath his hand. "It feels like they're fighting," He noted, slightly amused.
In the darkness, Padme grimaced, obviously not finding it nearly as amusing. "I feel like they're trying to tear out of me right now, except not the way they're supposed to go." She shifted again and let out a small moan of discomfort.
Anakin chuckled before sitting up, placing his other hand over her belly. "Let's see if they'll listen to me tonight."
"They better," Padme groaned, "I don't know how much longer I can take this, Ani. I'm ready to march down to the hospital right now and demand they induce me immediately. I don't want to be pregnant anymore!" She grimaced and bit her lip as a particularly sharp karate kick impacted her hip bone.
This was not the first time Padme had said something like that. Clearly, the larger stomach this time was making his wife much more uncomfortable than in her previous pregnancy, and he hated seeing her that way, watching her struggle to even move at times. Still, there were many more moments when they were home alone, not working on school work, when they both had a chance to truly marvel at this precious miracle given to them.
Despite the hardships of pregnancy (which, after reading that book Bail had given them, Anakin now realized were many), neither of them had any regrets.
"I know, Sweetie. Just one more month to go. You can do this, Angel." Women are tougher than men are, Anakin thought, as he leaned down and kissed his wife's forehead sweetly before concentrating on their children. He reached out through the Force, finding their presences with ease. Both were shining lights in the Force, so innocent and pure, and each time Anakin touched their presence with his, he felt so inadequate. How could he, a very imperfect man, be expected to raise both of his precious children? They were so perfect…what if he failed?
Not for the first time did Anakin think of the monumental task ahead of them...and felt deficient for the job.
He pushed those thoughts away, though, as his children recognized his presence. As usual, they began to kick faster, as if his being there was a shining light in their otherwise darkened world. Hello, Luke, he thought with a smile. His son's presence, though innocent due to the lack of life experience, was familiar to him. Hello, Leia. His daughter's was an entirely new presence for him. He had never felt her Force presence before in their old galaxy, so he was still trying to memorize hers.
Padme groaned. "Ani...That's not helping, whatever you're doing. You're making it worse, and it kinda hurts." She grimaced again and arched her back, reaching out to fist the bedspread.
"I know, Angel. Hold on." He smiled, beginning to send calming thoughts to his children. Be nice to your mother. STOP kicking her, he reminded them as he spoke to them through the Force. He doubted they could understand the words, but he did know they understood the feelings he projected. Sometimes, they were still too restless to fully calm down, but other times…
The kicking calmed until it stopped completely, though he could still feel them moving beneath his hands. Padme let out a sigh of relief. "Ohhhh, if only I could get my professors to let me bring you into the testing room with me, now that would be amazing." She said as Anakin smiled and leaned down and pressed his lips gently against her belly. "Then I could do my tests, and if they started fussing in there, you could calm them down."
Anakin laughed, lying back down next to her, one hand still over her stomach. "I don't think you'll be able to pull that one off, Angel. Besides, how would you even explain that?"
"I don't know," Padme admitted, "But that doesn't mean I can't try."
Anakin chuckled again, burying his face in her curls. He himself was quite ready for the twins to be born. Now that he knew for sure that Luke and Leia were coming, that he could finally hold them and be the father he always wanted to be, it was sheer torture waiting for them. They were so close, and yet still very much unreachable.
Of course, that said, he knew his anxiousness was nowhere near Padme's. She was more than ready for the twins to be born. He had to admit he couldn't blame her, considering how miserable she felt most of the time now.
"Try to go back to sleep, Sweetheart. Everyone is coming in the morning to help finish preparing the house. I assume you'll want to be out and about for that and not stuck in bed resting, right?"
Padme yawned, confirming his suspicions of how very tired she was. "Probably." She replied drowsily, and Anakin held her close as she drifted back to sleep, even while the babies within her moved about, very much awake. Anakin closed his eyes, letting their presence soothe over him. Soon, very soon, he would be a father. Anakin smiled contentedly to himself at the thought as he drifted back to sleep.
"Why are we baby proofing the house now if they aren't going to be crawling around and getting into things until about six months after they're born?!" Satine asked, as she helped install the baby proof locks in the kitchen drawers.
Padme, sitting down on one of the kitchen chairs with Jedi curled at her swollen feet, rubbed her rounded belly absent-mindedly as she opened her mouth to respond, but Mindy, working on the lower cabinets, answered for her. "From what I've been cataloging, Force sensitive babies can sometimes get into trouble...I mean...stuff with the Force even before they can crawl around. If those children are anything like Anakin, they'll probably try to get into everything from the moment they're born."
Padme smiled, looking down at her protruding belly, and giving it a gentle rub. Yes, she had a sneaking suspicion that Mindy was absolutely right about that. It was a good thing she was taking her last semester online, because otherwise, there would be no way that she could go to school and mother two very Force sensitive Skywalker children at the same time.
Besides, she wanted to spend as much time with them as she could and actually be their mommy...time she had been robbed of in her previous life.
Satine frowned. "So, if Obi-Wan and I have children…"
Padme shrugged her shoulders. "There's no guarantee that they'll be Force sensitive, Satine. Anakin and I are really one of the few incidents where a Jedi has had children, and Anakin is the most Force-sensitive person ever. Obi-Wan might be different. You won't know until it happens."
"Obi-Wan is still pretty Force-sensitive himself," Ahsoka, working on the Christmas decorations in the adjacent living room, pointed out. This year, Padme was much too big (and too close to delivery) to be able to travel around the country visiting family. As a result, they would be spending Christmas at home, with her parents and Sola's family coming to visit them on Christmas Day, and Anakin's parents coming to stay for a couple of weeks when the babies were born.
Satine blushed scarlet. "Well...we haven't really talked about children, but if we do have kidsand they're anything like Obi-Wan, then I'll be a lucky mother for sure." Padme grinned while Mindy rolled her eyes, muttering at what she deemed 'married-people sappiness,' and Ahsoka giggled.
Out of nowhere, a massive cramp low in her belly suddenly made Padme grimace in pain, grabbing her belly and biting her lip to keep from crying out. Satine paused. "Padme, are you alright?" She asked, and the other two girls stopped what they were doing to stare at Padme hopefully. Padme couldn't speak for a moment as she panted through the pain and then slowly let out a cleansing breath.
It had been happening more frequently lately—she would get a massive cramp in her back or her belly, and if the girls were anywhere near her, they would look at her as if she was going into labor right that second.
Padme waited for the cramp to pass, and after a couple of minutes, it finally did. "Yes, I'm fine," She assured them, waving them off, "I'm not going to have these babies just yet."
"That's been happening more and more, though," Ahsoka noted. Ahsoka, being one of the Order's Jedi Masters, was often at the house with Obi-Wan even when Satine wasn't. She had seen Padme's progression with the pregnancy more than the other two girls, or anyone in her family, for that matter.
Sadly, after the fight after the ballet, her relationship with her parents had become somewhat strained. She and Anakin still visited her parents' home, of course, at least two or three times a month, and her mother had even gone to a few of her ultrasounds with her and Anakin, but her father still seemed openly suspicious around Anakin now. Even her mother seemed apprehensive about what she didn't fully understand. Padme knew it was largely because they were worried for her (and now the twins), and they wanted her to be safe, but it was starting to become harder and harder to have patience with them. Why couldn't they accept her choice of husband? Didn't they trust her?
The topic always made her stress out, so she quickly put it aside. "It's just part of the twins fighting for space in there." She assured Ahsoka, even though at the moment the twins were relatively calm. It was almost like they enjoyed keeping her up at night and preferred to stay still and rest themselves whenever she didn't have time to take a nap.
Honestly, it was driving her crazy.
Ahsoka didn't seem convinced, but she let the subject drop.
"So the nursery is supposed to be done today, right?" Mindy asked after an awkward silence. "Any chance that we'll finally get to see it before we leave?"
Padme smiled, happy they were changing the subject. "Yes. Anakin and Obi-Wan were supposed to set up the cribs. They should be done by now." She looked off in the direction of the nursery. It was set up in Anakin's old room, and the twins would share the room at least for the first few years of their life. Perhaps they would move into a bigger home in the future, or she would simply let Luke use Galen's room (which was Mindy's old room) when he wasn't living with them…
"So, let's go see it." Mindy grinned.
"I agree," Satine replied with a smile, "You've been keeping it a surprise for us. Obi-Wan has said good things about it. I want to see what he's been talking about for the past few weeks."
Padme did not particularly relish the idea of getting up (she usually tried to avoid it, actually), but she supposed that she had kept her friends waiting long enough. "Oh, alright," She said, "As long as you help me get up."
Anakin held the crib piece steady as Obi-Wan screwed the bolt into the wood, linking the piece together with the rest of the crib frame. Anakin was currently telling Obi-Wan of Padme's recent craving for a Dex's Double, and due to the food only existing in their previous galaxy, he had not been able to get it for her.
"It was like I'd told her I ran over Jedi ten times with the SUV." He lamented, recalling the super sad look on her face after he'd broken the news that, in fact, there was nothing similar to that particular food in this world. "I tried to get her to eat the Chinese crispy noodles and pistachio almond ice cream and those Kraft mini marshmallows she's been craving for the past few months, but she barely touched it." He sighed. "Honestly, it makes me wish I could travel between both galaxies and get her the food she wants."
Obi-Wan laughed, though he glanced up at Anakin in sympathy. "I seriously hope that Satine doesn't get those kinds of cravings…whenever we decide to have children." He finished bolting, and he leaned back. "There. It's done."
As both men lifted each side of the crib and moved it to the right spot, Anakin laughed and said, "For your sake, I hope not! I'm relieved she hasn't asked for shurra fruit, which was always her favorite, because then I'd really be in trouble! I've not found anything remotely like shurra fruit here." Obi-Wan grinned and chortled as Anakin began to set up Leia's bedding inside of it, all the while regaling him with more fun pregnancy...adventures, like having to throw out all of her shoes (twice) when her feet had swelled so badly she couldn't fit in any of her shoes. Or the time she was wrapping Christmas gifts two weeks ago while sitting on the living room floor and then couldn't get up and was stuck, and he'd had to hastily jump out of the shower to go help her up, dripping wet and wearing only a loose towel around his hips. By the time Leia's bedding was done, both of them were almost crying from laughter.
Looking at his handiwork, he was thankful Padme had moved away from the idea of making everything in the room blue or pink. Most of the room was soft neutral colors with the children's bedding only accented by the colors. Above each crib, cream curtains hung over the heads, attached to the ceiling. Anakin wasn't sure what the point of that was, but it did look nice and less pointless with the cribs completed and in place. As Anakin finished Leia's bed, he also placed the little stuffed horse he'd gotten for her all those months ago inside of it. "There." He said triumphantly. "Perfect."
Obi-Wan took a measuring look around the room before nodding. "I agree. Padme has an eye and a talent for style."
"Yes, and a talent for getting me to put it together," He teased, though he knew she didn't actually have to do much to get him to agree. All she did was ask, and because he loved her more than anyone or anything else in the entire universe, he'd agreed without hesitation. Besides, his children deserved the best as well.
Obi-Wan sat down on the plush glider rocking chair in the corner of the room, rubbing a hand over his face. "I suppose the girls will want to see the room."
"Probably."
Obi-Wan smiled, but he didn't move to get up, and Anakin felt his brother hesitate through their Force connection. Clearly, Obi-Wan had something else to talk about. "Speak your mind, Obi-Wan." Anakin encouraged gently, leaning against the wall.
Obi-Wan didn't seem the least bit surprised that Anakin had sensed his emotions. "Obviously, you know that Padme is close to her delivery date."
"No, that never occurred to me." Anakin teased sarcastically, causing Obi-Wan to roll his eyes.
"Well," Obi-Wan continued, "I just thought that I should warn you…" He paused, as if coming up with the right words to say.
A million different things flashed through Anakin's head. What would Obi-Wan need to warn him about? "About what?" Anakin finally asked, not sure he truly wanted to know the answer. Obi-Wan looked him straight in the eye, as if he were about to reveal the universe's greatest secret.
"When she goes into labor…you're going to wish you still had your prosthetic hand."
It was said with so much seriousness, that Anakin wasn't sure if his friend was kidding or not. But then he remembered that Obi-Wan had been there with Padme when she'd first had Luke and Leia. He'd held her hand then. He was much more experienced than Anakin, in this case. He probably wasn't kidding.
So, with a serious nod, Anakin replied, "Duly noted."
"And, I wanted to ask another question," he shifted uncomfortably in his seat, and again Anakin could feel the unease in the Force. "Have you had any…visions? Like before?"
Anakin didn't need him to elaborate. Even now, years later and in a different galaxy, Anakin still remembered those awful dreams with perfect clarity. He scowled, crossing his arms over his chest. "No, thankfully. But, then again, I won't ever turn back to the Dark Side, so there's no reason for Padme to die of a broken heart again. She's healthy. The babies are healthy. Everything…"
"Die of what?!" Padme's voice suddenly interrupted, chilly and full of a barely controlled anger that he rarely heard from her. Anakin and Obi-Wan looked over at the door to the nursery, both of them surprised to see Padme standing there with the girls at her back, who gave Padme a confused look. Clearly, they weren't sure why she sounded upset either.
But she didn't just sound upset—she was furious. Anakin could feel it pulsing from her like white hot coals, and right now, she was barely holding it in check.
Somehow, Anakin didn't think this had anything to do with hormones…although he wasn't exactly sure why she was angry.
"Padme," He began, hesitatingly, thinking on every word before he said them. "Sweetheart, what's wrong?"
Apparently, it was the wrong thing to say.
"What's wrong?!" She repeated incredulously, "Did I just hear you right?! You think I died of a broken heart?!"
Alarmed, Anakin glanced at Obi-Wan, who seemed just as puzzled as Anakin. "Uh," Anakin began, looking back to his wife, trying to find the right words to say, but unsure of what they were.
Obi-Wan interrupted. "Padme," Obi-Wan began, "When you were dying, the medic who attended to you told me that physically you were perfectly healthy, but that you had simply lost the will to live."
Padme turned her glare on Obi-Wan, silent for a very long time, so long that even Obi-Wan shifted uncomfortably under her gaze. Hesitantly, Anakin tried to speak, "Angel…"
Her gaze snapped back to him. "Don't." Anakin shut his mouth as she whirled back on Obi-Wan. "That is the stupidest thing I have ever heard. I can't believe you believed that crap!" She shifted the glare back on Anakin. "And I can't believe you've believed that for who knows how long!" She actually cursed in Huttese, causing everyone's eyes to widen in shock (except Mindy's, as she had never heard that language before).
"It…never occurred to me to bring it up…" Anakin admitted honestly. He had been more concerned about trying to make up for the way he'd lashed out at her on Mustafar, and since they had settled that matter as best they could, Anakin had once again done his best to keep from thinking about how, exactly, she'd died. He'd only been grateful to have her back again. He had no idea she felt so strongly about the way he viewed her death.
Anger began to melt into hurt. "How could either of you think me so weak and selfish as to die that way?!" Tears of anger began to well up in her eyes, and Anakin was tempted to reach over and wipe them away, but he didn't feel that in that moment she would appreciate it.
"First of all, I wasn't going to just give up on trying to bring you back home to me as my Anakin! I knew there was still good in you, and I wasn't going to just give up and let other people fight for it! I knew you still loved me...and that meant you weren't fully a Sith, because a true Sith can't love. So, I knew there was a good chance to bring you back to the Light!" She was ranting now, and he couldn't help but notice her putting a hand to her belly. He could feel the twins' presence react distressingly to her emotions.
"Padme," He began, worried for her and the children, but she was not interested in being interrupted until she was finished.
"Not only that, but how could either of you think that I would willingly abandon my children right after their birth?! They needed me. I loved them! I wasn't going to orphan them if I could help it!" She shook her head vigorously. "No. Something was very, very wrong when I had those babies. Something that I could literally feel shutting down my body no matter how hard I fought against it, and I did try try to fight it." She scowled. "Broken heart…as if. I can't believe you've all thought that of me this entire time!"
The more she spoke, the more Anakin realized she was right—and how foolish he was to think otherwise. She had not died by his hand. She had lived and given birth to his children. He understood this fact only when he'd found out about Luke being his son. When Obi-Wan had told him the reason behind her death according to the medic, Anakin should have sensed that something was off. He knew his wife better than anyone. She was a fighter. She would have fought for him, died for him, if it brought him back to the Light. More importantly, she would have done everything in her power to be with their children. She would not have given them up so easily to others to care for and raise them...No, that was not his wife.
So…what, then, had killed her?
He didn't need to think about it long. Suddenly, the pieces clicked into place, and he let out an angry breath as white hot anger rushed through his veins. How had he not seen it? He should have put the pieces together a long time ago…
"Palpatine." He muttered darkly.
Padme hesitated, and again she touched her belly, wincing a little. "We don't know…"
"No," Anakin shook his head, his mind whirling. Again, he wondered how he had been so blind so as to not see it. So many years, he had thought losing Padme was all his fault, but the entire time, he had been serving under the man who had murdered her. The signs had been right in front of him… "I should have known…I should have…."
"Why, Anakin?" Obi-Wan asked, his voice bringing him back into reality, "What makes you so sure?"
Anakin scoffed. "Other than the fact that Palpatine is the epitome of evil?" He sarcastically asked, and Obi-Wan frowned, clearly not appreciating the sarcasm. Anakin took a few deep breaths to calm down. "Padme was five months pregnant when I found out. Think about it, Obi-Wan. If her life was truly in danger, I would have had those dreams while we were in the Outer Rim, even before I'd found out. I only had them when I got back to Coruscant. I'd also confided in Palpatine of my dreams of my mother dying, and by then I had killed Count Dooku, and Palpatine had already chosen me to be his new apprentice." He looked at his wife's swollen belly, feeling his children's presence clearly through the Force. "He would have been looking for a reason to convince me to turn, he would have sensed…" He trailed off upon seeing his wife's face.
Padme had paled, while Ahsoka cleared her throat. "Is it even possible to manipulate someone else's dreams?" She asked, her voice filled with worry.
Anakin met her eyes, a grim scowl on his face. "With the Dark Side, it is. You can even alter memories, if you're powerful enough, although that usually destroys an adult's mind, so it's not usually used."
"It's incredibly invasive…some would argue that it's one of the worst things a Force Wielder can do, messing with someone's mind." Obi-Wan agreed. Anakin did not bother to mention that he had done those sorts of things multiple times as Darth Vader. Besides, Obi-Wan and Padme, and even Ahsoka already knew about it. There was no point in bringing it up again.
"So this could happen again." Satine quietly stated. It wasn't a question. Looking at the girls in the doorway, Anakin had a feeling they already knew the answer.
"It's possible…although, I have not had any dreams lately. So, I doubt that Palpatine will try that route again." Anakin couldn't say for sure if that would be the case, but he had a feeling Palpatine was looking for other ways to bring Anakin and his family down. Not only that, but Palpatine probably thought Anakin figured all of this out a long time ago. Shamefully, that had not been the case. He glanced at his wife, who was again shifting uncomfortably. "Padme, I'm so sorry…we should have discussed this a long time ago, preferably back when we discussed," He paused, glancing at everyone else. "The other things."
Padme seemed to melt a little, the anger and confusion leaving her eyes. "It's okay Ani," she began, taking a step forward…and stopped. Suddenly, she leaned against the doorway, her hands on her stomach, alarm flashing across her face. She grimaced, her face contorting with pain, as she let out a long low "Aaarrrgghhh." Just then, before anyone could move...
GUSH
Everyone froze in shock as fluid suddenly poured down Padme legs, soaking her casual maternity dress.
"Ani, my water just broke!" Padme declared through gritted teeth, before doubling over, hands clenching her belly, and letting out an agonized wail.
Panic raced through his blood as a million thoughts slammed into him at once: Was there some sort of sudden complication? Was Padme okay?
Were Luke and Leia okay? This was too soon! She wasn't due for another month!
Anakin was at her side in an instant, wrapping an arm around her for support. "Padme," He queried, trying to keep his voice calm. He didn't want to alarm her, even if he was worried. For a moment, she didn't answer, her eyebrows furrowing, face clenched with pain, as she clutched her stomach. She breathed deeply, pain sweeping across her face.
It seemed to take ages, and his impatience was growing, but finally, whatever was happening seemed to subside, at least for the moment, though the look of pain did not fully leave her eyes. "Ani," She managed to say through gritted teeth, "It's time."
Anakin froze. Literally, froze.
He stared at her, blinking, not fully comprehending. He didn't even breathe. Years of commanding legions of soldiers through intergalactic battles had not prepared him for this. Somehow, this seemed vastly more important than anything he had ever done.
And, he suddenly was not ready.
"Ani?" Padme was calling, her voice muffled in his ears.
"Oh Lord, we're going to have to admit both of you to the hospital," Mindy sighed, rolling her eyes. "One for having a baby, and the other for going into shock."
"Anakin, where is her overnight bag?" Satine was asking. He knew the answer to that question. Padme had gone over it with him a thousand times. But, it suddenly didn't seem to matter anymore.
Padme was about to put her life at risk giving birth to his children.
Luke and Leia were coming.
He was about to be a dad. For real.
And, he was on the verge of having his own meltdown now.
It was Obi-Wan that snapped Anakin back to reality. "Anakin." Obi-Wan's voice was firm, commanding, like it was whenever Anakin had gotten into trouble as his Padawan. Anakin slowly looked at him, blinking. Obi-Wan was standing now, jaw set, determination in his eyes. "Your family needs you. You have a job to do—an important one at that. Snap out of it and get to work!"
"Right," Anakin said, shaking his head. "Okay. Satine, the overnight bag is in the front hall closet. Mindy, take Jedi outside, and make sure he has food and water. Ahsoka, make sure Artoo and Threepio are plugged in and charging in the garage. Obi-Wan, I need you to call Vokara to let her know we're on our way. I'm going to go help Padme change into some dry clothes and then take her to the hospital. Mindy, please call her parents and Sola and let them know. Obi-Wan, please call my mother and let her know."
Now that he was in general mode, and giving orders, he was beginning to become a little more comfortable. He was good at giving orders. He was good at action.
Soon, however, there would be nothing he could do except hold Padme's hand while she delivered their children, trusting her life and the lives of his children to the expertise of someone else. He shook that thought away. Dwelling on that would not make things better.
Wrapping one arm around her waist, he took Padme's arm in his other hand and slowly walked her across the living room to their bedroom to help her change out of her wet clothes, whispering loving encouragement to his wife, never wavering even when they had to pause twice as more contractions hit, preventing her from moving. As everyone else scrambled about doing what he'd asked, he kept his focus on his wife and her needs.
Force! This was it.
The twins are coming, he thought with excitement and awe.
Never had Anakin felt more inadequate than in that moment. Padme wasn't the only who needed to breathe.
As he'd feared, Anakin felt utterly helpless as soon as Padme was settled into her hospital room.
The time between contractions rapidly decreased, her cries and shrieks of pain escalating with each one. Vokara had met them at the registration desk when they'd arrived, and as soon as they'd gotten to the room and Padme had changed into a hospital gown and got into bed, she performed an internal exam. Padme was dilated to four centimeters. The nurse immediately hooked Padme up to an IV to provide her with fluids, as Vokara monitored the readout from the fetal monitor. "When you reach six centimeters, Padme, then we can call anesthesia and administer an epidural. Ok?" Vokara said.
Another contraction hit, and Padme moaned, "Bring it on...The faster, the better...Ohhhh."
"Remember to breathe Padme. That's it...slow, deep breathing...In through the nose, out through the mouth," Vokara coached her, as Padme nodded her understanding.
The time it took for Padme to progress just two more centimeters seemed an eternity to Anakin, as he watched his wife writhe in sheer agony with the force of the contractions. He watched in shocked amazement each time one hit, because her stomach would harden, and he could literally see thewave from each contraction ripple across her belly.
He was starting to understand why it was called labor.
Encouraging her as best he could, he wiped her flushed face gently with a cool damp cloth, brushing her now sweat-dampened hair tenderly back from her forehead, and silently cursed why it was taking so long before she could be given some pain relief.
This was ridiculous!
Just then, Vokara returned to check Padme's progress. "Excellent! You're at six centimeters. Are you ready for the epidural now?"
Padme snorted, " Are you kidding?! I've been ready. I was ready as soon as my water...Aaaghhh." Another contraction took hold, and Vokara watched the monitors to see how the twins were handling the stress of labor as Anakin leaned in close and whispered encouragingly to his wife.
Within just a few minutes, a tall, smiling man walked in wearing blue surgical scrubs. "I hear someone's ready for some happy juice in here!" Anakin and Padme must have shown matching looks of shocked surprise, as the man began to chuckle, and Vokara and the nurse grinned. Walking over to the bed, the man was older than Anakin had first thought, with dark hair graying at the temples visible beneath his surgical cap. He wore glasses, but his expression was one of smiling calming friendliness. He looked like someone Anakin had seen before, but he couldn't remember exactly who.
Padmedidthough.
As the man reached out his hand to shake Padme's and Anakin's hands, announcing, "Hi, I'm Dr. Griffin, the anesthesiologist on duty today," Padme grinned, a sappy charmed look on her face, and declared:
"You look just like Sean Connery! Has anybody ever told you that?!"
That's when it clicked. Yeah, this man really did look just like that actor who played James Bond in those movies Padme and Mindy liked. No wonder his wife was grinning from ear to ear. Anakin grinned, too.
Dr. Griffin beamed, clearly pleased by the comment. "Yes, I've heard that before, but I don't mind hearing it again...especially coming from such a sweet young mommy such as yourself!"
Anakin watched, amused, as Padme actuallyblushed and , the labor was going to his wife's head.
Dr. Griffin chuckled, giving Padme's arm a quick pat, and said, "You and I are going to get along just fine!"
Anakin liked this man immediately, and if he could help ease his wife's intense pain, he'd like him all the more.
Dr. Griffin called down to the nurse's station for the supplies he would need, while Vokara and the nurse helped Padme sit up and move to the edge of the bed, her legs dangling over the side. Anakin stepped away from the bed to allow the medical staff to maneuver in the small space.
Once the supplies were ready and on hand, Dr. Griffin moved behind Padme, scrubbed her bare back with surgical scrub to make sure the area was sterile, and told her to lean against Vokara's shoulder for support. They waited for another contraction to pass, and then, in one swift, practiced movement, Dr. Griffin had inserted the epidural, taped it into place to secure it, and started the pain medicine on the IV control box at a steady rate.
"Well done, Padme. It went in the first try. See, I knew we'd get along well! Feels better already, I bet." Dr. Griffin said, pausing on his way to the door.
Vokara and the nurse eased Padme back into bed, and she smiled sweetly and remarked, "You are a lifesaver! Seriously, we're like friends for life now." A look of complete relief washed over her face as the medicine kicked in, and her pain eased off immediately.
Dr. Griffin chuckled again,"Good! One can never have too many friends...especially in mylineofwork!" Padme grinned and held out her hand to grab Anakin's, tugging him back toward the bed.
told Vokara and the nurse to call him if there were any problems, then exited the room. The nurse smiled at Padme and said, "Looks like you won't have too long of a labor from this point! Some women can go hours, even days, before it's time to have the baby."
"Don't jinx it," Padme ground out through gritted teeth, as another contraction hit her, the epidural not quite totally kicked in yet. Anakin didn't need to ask whenever she was hit with one. He could feel her pain through the Force, and even if he couldn't, her face contorted into a grimace of pain. Still, once the epidural was working fully, she was able to relax, and she was taking it rather well, or so Vokara said when she came back to check on her thirty minutes later. She had rapidly dilated to eight centimeters with the help of the epidural.
Anakin almost wished that Obi-Wan was allowed back with them so that he could ask him how things were similar and the same as last time. He felt so…inadequate.
He'd been given his own scrubs to put on over his clothes the closer she got to actually pushing with the contractions, with strict instructions from Vokara to keep it on. Apparently, newborn babies were susceptible to disease, and the precautions were necessary. Anakin wasn't sure if their hospitals back in his galaxy did that, but if it would protect his children, he'd do anything.
He now sat next to Padme, one hand in hers, while the other gently stroked her forehead. As soon as the nurse left, he asked the most obvious question he could have asked. "How are you feeling, Sweetheart?"
Padme managed to smile tiredly. "I'm not in as much pain now, thank the Force, but I'm already exhausted, and I still have all that pushing to do."
Anakin let out a sigh, frustrated that he couldn't do more to help. He was a man who acted, not a man who waited for the action to take place. "I hate seeing you in pain, Angel." He said, again stating the obvious. Padme was well aware that Anakin hated it when she was in any sort of pain or danger.
She opened her mouth to respond, but instead gasped as another contraction hit her. This time, a moan escaped her lips, not so much from pain this time, but more from an intense feeling of pressure in her groin, and she leaned her head back against the pillows, taking deep breaths.
Anakin tightened his grip on her hand, trying to lend encouragement. When the contraction passed, she breathed out in relief. "That was a big one," She huffed, glancing back over at Anakin. "We knew this was going to come, though." She reminded him.
"I know," Anakin wiped some sweat from her forehead. "That doesn't make it any easier."
"You're telling me," she teased, and Anakin managed to smile. If she was still able to tease him, she was doing just fine. Another contraction hit her, and again she closed her eyes and moaned with the feeling of pressure.
When she finished, Anakin decided to try to help by getting her mind off of the contractions. "Obi-Wan texted me earlier. Your parents have arrived and are out in the lobby with Obi-Wan, Satine, and Mindy and Ahsoka. Sola is still wrapping up filming, so she can't make it, and he also called my mom, and she will be leaving first thing in the morning to come here."
They had decided, much to her parent's displeasure, that the moment of Luke and Leia's birth was too intimate, too private and important for them, and that it was a moment that should only be for them, just the two of them, as it should have been in their old galaxy. Besides, from Anakin's point of view, the twins' conception had certainly been a private intimate moment between just he and his wife, and their birth shouldn't be any different.
"I figured." Padme replied in a strained voice. "We're lucky Sola was able to agree to come for Christm—AAHH!"
Anakin shifted restlessly, just wanting to do something other than just stare at his wife writhing with each contraction. "Maybe I should get Vokara…" He began, starting to get up, but Padme's hand tightened around his own.
"It isn't time just yet," She huffed, sweat beading across her top lip. "Almost, but not quite."
Anakin hesitated, looking towards the hospital door. Everything in him screamed to go get the doctor, but something deeper whispered to him to stay and trust his wife. "Are you sure, Angel?" he asked, but he was already sitting back down in his chair.
Padme nodded. "I've done this before. Remember?"
"Sort of." He managed a sad smile. "But I guarantee this experience is going to be burned into my mind permanently." He frowned, recalling their conversation just before she'd gone into labor. Had the stress of it caused her to go into labor? He should have insisted she calm down, or at least sit down while they discussed it.
"Padme," He began, "About earlier…"
She held up a hand, stopping him. "I know. I'm sorry."
He blinked in surprise. "You don't have anything to be sorry for. I should have brought it up before, but…" he trailed off.
"You didn't want to think about it. I know. I get it. To be honest, when I remembered," She paused, closing her eyes tightly as another contraction hit. She continued once it passed, giving Anakin's hand another reassuring squeeze. "When I remembered, I thought it was a strange sensation I was remembering, but it's sort of creepy to remember your past life's death, so I tried to ignore it, just like you did."
Well, he was certainly happy to know she was no longer furious with him. He hated it when she was angry, especially when it was directed at him. She was…frightening when she was really angry. Even Darth Vader would have paused to rethink how he approached her when she was like that. Thankfully, it was rare for his sweet tempered wife to get that angry, but it was still nerve wracking when it happened.
He didn't get a chance to continue the conversation, however, for Vokara re-entered the room. "Alright," she said, and Anakin knew her well enough to know that she was already focusing on what needed to be done next. "Let's see where we're at, shall we?"
"Almost there, Padme, push! Come on! You can do it!" Vokara was saying, and Padme let out another painful scream that tore at Anakin's heart, his eyes tearing up at the amount of pain she was in again. Vokara had explained that the epidural needed to be mostly worn off in time for Padme to be able to feel when to push. As a result, her pain was now back full force with two babies fighting at the same time for the exit.
Anakin thought her anger was scary. Oh, he was wrong. So very, very wrong.
This was horrifying.
How do women do this? Anakin thought, simply floored at the strength, stamina, and endurance labor and delivery required of a woman.
His respect for his wife...and all women, really, was growing exponentially from this experience.
And sure enough, just as Obi-Wan had warned, with each push, her hand tightened on his to the point that the bones in his hand felt like they were cracking, and he certainly was wishing that he had his metal hand back, if only for this one moment. Still, he didn't complain. His discomfort was nothing compared to Padme's. So, he held her hand and murmured words of encouragement to her while she pushed, placing his arm around her back to support her while while she pushed.
"One more!" Vokara urged, and Padme gritted her teeth and closed her eyes tight, sweat drenching tendrils of her hair to her face, her bare legs shaking in the stirrups, as she gave one long final push…For their first baby, that is. Anakin honestly had no idea how she was going to push another baby out. Silently, he even wondered if she'd ever want to make love with him again after this.
Padme bore down with all the strength she could muster and let out a long screeching yell with the effort, and suddenly...
The room was filled with the wailing cries of a baby. His firstborn.
"Congratulations! It's a boy!" Vokara declared, as she held up their squalling son for them to see, tears of joy falling down their cheeks.
All of a sudden, the world seemed to disappear as a familiar Force presence washed over him, accompanying the lusty cries.
Luke.
"Anakin, do you want to cut the cord?" Vokara asked. Anakin nodded his head vigorously, and followed Vokara' s instructions, clipping the cord, and then watching impatiently as his son was taken by the neonatal nurse to be dried off, examined, and weighed, an I.D. bracelet being wrapped around his tiny ankle, at the same time I.D. bracelets were placed on his and Padme's wrists.
"Congratulations," the nurse was saying as she gently wrapped him in a white blanket, "You have a son."
Our Luke.
The need to hold his son was overwhelming. He had waited years to hold his children, and now… now…
Padme weakly let go of his hand as he was handed the squirming baby, who felt much lighter than he had anticipated. He stopped breathing, staring down with loving awe at the little innocent life in his arms.
His son. His Luke.
Images of the last time he'd seen Luke swirled through his mind. Luke struggling to drag him towards the shuttle that would get them off of the second Death Star. Luke urging him to stay with him, concern and worry etched into his features, despite the fact that Vader had been more of a massive disappointment for a father than anything else. That didn't seem to matter to Luke though. He had still projected his love for his father through their Force bond, and now...
Here he was. Innocent and fragile. His little tuft of hair was still light brown, but Anakin knew that it would one day lighten, and he would grow to look more like him. As Anakin held him, he felt the boy instinctively reach out through the Force, feeling the world around him. It didn't take long for the boy to connect with Anakin, and Anakin gently responded with love and a fierce need to protect the child in his arms. Luke stilled for a moment, calming, his presence latching onto his own as if it were the only thing keeping him alive and breathing.
Padme collapsed back against the pillows, breathing hard, taking that moment to take a break. "Padme," Anakin managed to choke out, his voice rough. He finally realized, then, that he was crying.
He didn't care.
Padme opened her eyes, every inch of her face lined with exhaustion and pain, but once her tired gaze fell on Luke, her eyes brightened. "Luke," She whispered, a small, pained smile spreading across her lips.
Anakin smiled back, holding Luke close so that she could see him. He longed to give him to her to hold, but he could sense that it would soon be time for her to push Leia into the world to join her brother. "Say hello to your mother, Luke."
Padme reached over, gently stroking Luke's cheek, and the tiny boy instinctively leaned his face into her touch, a soft cry escaping his throat, making both of his parents smile. He was so quiet, but then again, he hadn't been one for speeches back in their old galaxy. Perhaps he had been more talkative around Leia and Han, and his other friends, but with the exception of their fight on Bespin, he had seemed to contemplate his words before he said them around Vader.
Another wave of pain suddenly hit Padme, and she pulled her hand back, a cry escaping her lips. "It's time to start pushing again, Padme. One more baby to go," Vokara announced.
"Anakin," Padme managed to grind out through clenched teeth. The message was clear: She needed him still. Doting on their children would need to wait. Anakin handed Luke back to a nurse, albeit reluctantly, giving Padme his sore hand once more. His eyes lingered on his son, who had started to whimper now that he wasn't in his parent's direct presence, and he sent feelings of comfort to his son to calm him. We aren't leaving you, Luke, he promised, not this time. I have to help your mother with your sister.
His son calmed, and as Padme again pushed, screaming in pain, Anakin snapped his attention back to the arrival of his second child.
This time, it did not seem to go as smoothly. It was taking longer for Padme to push Leia out. Tears of pain flowed freely down her face, but still she kept fighting. "Harder, Padme, push harder!" Vokara encouraged.
"You can do this, Angel," Anakin whispered, kissing her sweat-drenched forehead. He was still horrified at how much was involved in a woman giving birth, and the amount of his wife's blood in the room was making him sick, but now that he had held the miracle that was his son in his arms, it was almost...well, just barely, bearable. "You're almost done, Sweetie."
Suddenly, Padme began to shiver violently all over, and even her teeth were chattering. Anakin felt her alarm spike in the Force, and looking over at Vokara, he noted a look of deep concern on her face.
Something was suddenly wrong.
Padme's shivering intensified, and she looked at Anakin with fear in her eyes, and Vokara grimaced, and the nurse reached over immediately and slapped the emergency call button on the wall behind Padme's bed, and instantly, Vokara yelled out, "I need mag...STAT!"
Fearing for his wife, Anakin started to demand to know what was happening, but at that moment, additional nurses and Dr. Griffin came running into the room, and something was injected immediately into Padme's IV, and her response was instantaneous. Her eyes widened alarmingly, she threw her head back against the pillow, arched her back off the bed, and screamed at the top of her voice, "MY ARM IS ON FIRE!"
Anakin's ears were ringing from the volume of his wife's screaming, but he still heard Vokara saying,"Padme, listen to me. You were seizing...that's what all that shaking was...We've given you medicine to stop it. That's why your arm feels like its burning."
Looking down at his exhausted wife, Anakin noticed the shivering had indeed stopped. Turning his attention back to Vokara, he listened intently as she explained what was going on.
"Now, the baby is trying to come out face first, and the forehead is getting caught on your pubic bone. So, I'm going to have to maneuver the baby to get it in the right position. So, whatever you do, don't push until I tell you, even if you feel the urge to. Got it? Do not push! Understand?"
Padme nodded her head weakly, tears leaking out of the corner of her eyes to slide down the sides of her cheeks into her hair. Anakin leaned over and gently kissed her forehead and whispered how much he loved her and how proud he was of her, encouraging her in every way he could.
He wished he could do more, and hated that he couldn't.
Vokara worked quickly, and they heard a slight pop, at the same time Padme eyes widened and she moaned "Ughhh."
Satisfied, Vokara said, "Ok, Padme...next contraction, give me a big push."
Something like determination flashed in Padme's eyes, and somehow (he honestly wasn't sure how since he'd already lost the feeling in his hand), she squeezed his hand even tighter and, with one final yell that sounded more like a battle cry to him, she bore down and pushed, againherlegsshaking with the effort, straining andgiving it everything she had.
A very loud wailing suddenly filled the room, a wailing that seemed to shake Anakin to the core.
Leia.
Luke, hearing and perhaps even feeling the cries of his twin, began to cry as well, though Leia's wailing drowned most of it out.
Oh yes, Anakin thought with a huge, dopey smile gracing his face, she is my daughter, for sure!
"Congratulations twice over, you two!" Vokara said with a smile, needing to raise her voice to be heard over Leia's lusty wails, "You have a daughter as well." She smiled tiredly as she held Leia, also now wrapped in a white blanket, having been wiped down, examined (much to her vocalized displeasure), and weighed, a pink I.D. bracelet around her own tiny ankle. Vokara handed the squalling baby girl to Anakin. "I'm very happy for you both."
She motioned to the nurse holding Luke, who carefully handed the boy to Padme, where his cries calmed immediately into whimpers once more, as he was cradled against his mother's bosom.
Again, Anakin was washed in Leia's Force presence, so different, and yet so similar to Luke's. It was still bright with innocence, like a light in the darkness, but hers seemed to be more…direct? Anakin wasn't sure if that was the right word. In many ways, he could see himself in her presence, and thinking back to his encounters with her in their galaxy, she had responded to things rather firmly, in ways that reminded him of himself now that he thought on it.
Her tuft of hair was dark, but much darker than Luke's. Anakin knew that when she opened her eyes, he would find himself looking into Padme's beautiful eyes. Leia may have had her similarities with Anakin, but Anakin also had no doubt that she was her mother's daughter in even more ways. He could feel it, and now that he held her…
Images of her torture on the Death Star flashed through his mind. Images of her struggling against his grip as she watched her planet be destroyed in front of her. He remembered her hatred blazing brightly through the Force when they met again on Bespin, her despair as she watched him freeze her lover in carbonite.
Guilt accompanied the feelings of love and protection he felt as he held her body close to him. He had been the cause of so much of her suffering, and yet now, here she was, an innocent babe, in his arms, given to him once more by the Force, this time to raise and love as he should have the first time. What if she remembered what he'd done to her? He shuddered at the thought. Surely, she would despise him. He wouldn't blame her if she did.
In many ways, the thought of raising Leia scared him more than that of raising Luke. Luke was forgiving like his mother, but Leia was stubborn and set in her beliefs, much like…well, both Padme and Anakin combined. She'd received a double dose of stubbornness it would seem.
Well, at least, she came by it honestly, he had to admit.
No, he would not receive forgiveness from her for what he'd done if she knew. However, if he raised her and showed her the unconditional love and devotion he had for her, showed her how much he had changed… perhaps, even if she did remember, she'd give him a chance. That chance was all he desperately wanted when it came to Leia, a chance to be loved in return as her father.
She continued to wail, squirming around, and again, he tried to reach out through the Force to calm her. To his utter surprise, she responded…it wasn't with words, but with her bold impressions, confirming her Skywalker genes.
It was too cold.
It was too bright in here.
She wanted her brother. Now.
It was too cold.
Okay, okay, my Princess, he communicated back, I will help you. Amusedat his daughter's already strong opinions, he pulled the blanket more securely around her, trying to get her warmer, and he brought her closer to Padme and Luke. Her cries quieted to whimpers, but did not completely go away.
Padme was crying now, too. "They're beautiful, Ani," She managed to whisper.
"They're perfect, Angel," He agreed, and he noticed that he was also crying…again. "Leia, this is your mother. She's a very beautiful woman, and you look just like her, Princess."
That made Padme smile, and her eyes drifted from Luke to Leia. "Oh, Ani," she breathed, "I finally feel fully complete."
He didn't need her to elaborate—he knew. He had spent so many years as half a man while being Darth Vader, and even when he and Padme had reunited and re-sealed their love here in this world, he had always known that Luke and Leia were missing from the picture. The feeling of incompleteness had lessened once he was sure that Padme was carrying them, but now that they were finally born, breathing, and in their arms, he felt as if the entire universe was somehow right again.
Looking up from their children, Anakin stared into his wife's eyes, and never had she looked more beautiful to him than right then. His heart overflowing with love, he leaned in and gently kissed her. "I love you, Padme. Thank you for the gift of these precious babies," he whispered.
Despite her exhaustion, she beamed at him. "I love you, too, Ani."
A nurse approached them with a clipboard. "Have you two decided on names for them yet?" She asked with a smile, a pen already pressed to the paper.
"Luke and Leia," Anakin answered without hesitation, his eyes meeting Padme's.
"Luke and Leia Skywalker."
YAY LUKE AND LEIA ARE BORN!
So one of the very first things I wanted to address when even thinking about writing this chapter was that the birth scene in the movie was like...Barbie unrealistic. Sure, Padme cried. Sure, she died. But like...it didn't look like anything she should have had problems with. I mean I'm not asking for graphic, but that's what I pictured happening when I was like...five. Which...I guess...maybe was their targeted audience, except that again, it was a PG-13 movie, and I've seen better birthing scenes in PG-13...IDK.
So I consulted with people I know who actually had twins (who ALSO agreed that scene was totally unrealistic) and I combined that with stories my mom has told me and...here it is! And a serious thank you to my Beta SW who worked super hard to help me make this chapter perfect. I have never had children myself, so all of the input anyone has given me, thank you to those people, because my scene would probably have not been much more realistic than the movies had I not gotten that information.
The music for this chapter was very important. I imagined A New Hope and End Credits by John Williams from Episode 3 for most of this chapter, but when Anakin holds his children for the very first time I pictured Suddenly, performed by Hugh Jackman from Les Miserables. The two stanzas that really strike me as being in line with the moment are these:
How was I to know at last
That happiness can come so fast?
Trusting me the way you do
I'm so afraid of failing you
Just a child who cannot know
That danger follows where I go
There are shadows everywhere
And memories I cannot share...
Nevermore alone
Nevermore apart
You have warmed my heart
Like the sun.
You have brought the gift of life
And love...
Suddenly I see
What I could not see
Something suddenly
Has begun.
I know this is a long authors note, but I just thought some things were important to note. If you read to the end of this, you are my hero.
Anyhow, Review! AND HAPPY EARLY STAR WARS DAY! :D I'm going to a Star Wars Symphony and I'm going to wear my classy Darth Vader stockings! So excited! #bestholidayEVER
Love,
Sarah
