The day of Lightning´s test dawned cloudless and hot.

Sephiroth knew the task he had set her would push her limits a lot. A hundred rounds. He really wasn´t sure wether she could do it.

But she deserved them. Every single one of them.

He still couldn´t believe that she had done something stupid like this.

She probably hadn´t realized how badly Shin-Ra and Lazard wanted her out.

Serving her head on a plate like that... Just to try and save Strife from the inevitable.

General Sephiroth Crescend could only shake his head.

That idiot´s expulsion from SOLDIER was only a matter of time anyway.

He didn´t know how, but somehow he had managed to resist the urge to slap her as she had finally stood in front of him.

The little bitch hadn´t even been able to look him in the eyes.

Pathetic.

The silver haired first class, he didn´t care for her empty words, her feeble appologies.

He found he couldn´t put in words how angry and disappointed he was.

Yes disappointed.

It was up from the stands overlooking the running pit that he watched her descend to her doom, Zack Fair and Cloud Strife hot on her heals as usual.

Oh, she´d better prove to him he hadn´t been doing the wrong thing, convincing them to let her stay.


'I still can´t believe he´s making you do a hundred rounds...' Cloud voiced his concerns carefully.

'I mean he was the one who convinced Shin-Ra to let you stay.'

The pink haired second class making her way down to the training grounds to receive her punishment, she couldn´t help but feel nervous.

She knew it wasn´t only a punishment. It was also a trial. And if she failed she was packing her stuff before dinner.

She hadn´t been able to get much sleep that night, had been tossing and turning around in her bed, her mind not able to shut down at all.

A hundred rounds on the running track was a lot.

She didn´t know whether she could make it.

She highly doubted it in fact.

'I actually heard that originally he had been planning to make her do 150 and that Angeal actually talked him into reducing it!' Zack kindly informed.

Great.

That was making her feel so much better.

Her two comrades trailing down the path behind her, Claire Farron couldn´t help but sigh.

She knew Sephiroth was angry with her for taking the blame, knew he didn´t understand what helping Cloud had meant to her.

Because it meant that she was still human.

Standing up for another.

A concept the silver haired general probably wasn´t human enough to grasp.

But what she didn´t understand was how after risking everything convincing Shin-Ra to let her stay, he was now eager to kick her out himself.

It made no sense.

No sense at all.

It was quarter to 11 when they arrived at the training pitch and all her spectators were already gathered.

She recognized some soldiers she knew from basic training and she could even make out the form of what had to be Director Lazard on one of the top stands patiently watching from under a pink parasol. He was probably eager to witness her failure from a seat in the front row so he could notify her of her dismissal in person as early as possible.

She spotted the first classes seated somewhere in the middle, her silver haired sensei glaring at her disapprovingly, probably thinking that this served her right. To his left sat Genesis absorbed in that stupid book of his as usual and on his right was Angeal Hewley, who gave her an encouraging smile and a thumbs up.

Thanks Angeal...

Zack and Cloud left her to find a place in the first row, both of them eager to support her and to cheer her on, the latter of them looking slightly guilty as he took his seat in the pleasant shadows of the stands.

If it hadn´t been for Cloud...

Still.

She was happy they were there.

Both of them.

Without these two she would have cracked ages ago.

Entering the running tack, Lightning couldn´t help but notice the sweltering heat. With sunny cloudless skies above and temperatures of at least 30°C already, apparently weather was against her.

Great.

Things were getting worse by the minute.

She had no idea how long a hundred rounds would take her, if she could even make it at all that was, but she knew the longer it would take her, the hotter it was going to get.

Taking a few last sips from her water bottle, Lightning tried to relax.

No break, he had said.

No break meant no water.

Oh, she was so done for.

Setting her bottle down to the ground, the pink haired soldier couldn´t help but feel slightly nauseated.

He was going to kill her.

Was that his plan?

Maybe it was.

Oh what had she gotten herself into again?

A few months ago he had bought her Blaze Edge, had acutally complimented her infront of the others, Director Lazard even, had lied for her. He had been proud of her. Had recommended her for second.

How had they gone from there to him trying to kill her again so quickly?

Somehow Lightning had a feeling things had all gone downhill the day she'd pulled that stupid knife in the training room.

Stupid.

Stupid.

Stupid.

Either way.

This was not the time to worry about any of it.

She had to focus on the task at hand.

Or she'd never have to worry about anything SOLDIER related ever again.

But how was she going to make this?!

'You can do it Light!' she heard Zack´s cheerful voice from somewhere in the stands and she turned to look into his familiar sky blue eyes. She found her black haired friend giving her an encouraging nod, a smile plastered over his face.

Well, at least somebody did believe in her.

Claire Farron tried very hard to return the smile, but found she simply couldn´t as she turned to take her position at the starting line, closing her eyes and trying to focus.

You can do it.

You can do it!

Just start slowly.

Don´t run fast.

You have to preserve you energy.

And your water supply.

Zack had been there for her the previous night. Had listened to her tantrum. Had listened to her weeping. Had put a comforting arm around her shoulder.

The two of them had stayed up late into the night.

And all the time he had been trying to console her.

To convince her she could make it.

And maybe she would.

Yes. It would be tough, but she could do it.

She had to.

Success was an option.

Failure was not.

Taking one last deep breath, the pink haired soldier second class opened her eyes and leaning slightly forward she lifted her right foot to begin what was definitely going to be a very long run.


It was already past noon and the quicksilver of the thermometer was reaching the 36°C mark, the midday sun turning the training grounds of Midgar into a torrid desert.

Cloud and Zack had left the pitch about half an hour ago.

Lightning couldn´t blame them. She knew they had assignments to tend to.

She had also noticed Director Lazard was gone.

He had probably been bored. Probably had not expected her to last that long.

She had lost count of how many rounds she had already done as well as how many she still had to do but the pink haired female knew she wasn´t going to last much longer.

For rounds she had already felt burnt out and exhausted and weak.

Her sweat running down her arms and legs in tiny rivers and with the sun burning her sensitive pale skin, a stabbing headache pounding in her temples, Lightning knew she was nearing the point of collapse fast.

Her lungs burning like crazy and her mouth and throat dry as sanding paper, the poor pink haired soldier would have done anything for a few sips of water.

But she wasn´t granted any.

No breaks, he had said.

And no breaks it was.

The only thing that would break was her. Because yes, she knew she was on the verge of breaking, as staggering around in her black leathered combat boots she had to work hard to keep her body from hitting the ground.

She knew once she fell she would be done for. Knew she wouldn´t be able to get back on her feet.

Exhaustion and dehydration had taken their toll on her.


'You know, you should probably go down and tell her… I mean she´s already passed her 120th round now...' Angeal Hewley´s voice suggested cautiously.

The burly soldier knew it would be dangerous to upset Sephiroth today. Judging from his expression at the least.

'...'

There was no reaction coming from the silver haired first class whatsoever.

'Yeah, Angeal is right... She´s had enough.' Genesis Rhapsodos agreed looking up from his book for once and down at the small form of Lightning staggering around the pitch, in concern.

She was still struggling to go on.

She had been pushed far beyond her limits. Oblivious to the fact that she had already succeeded.

Angeal and Genesis couldn´t understand what their friend was playing at.

What he was doing just didn´t seem fair.

Well, it wasn´t fair. The general had to admit.

But he let show no emotions as silently he pondered their words.

He´d been watching his protégé closely for the past few rounds, had been waiting for her to break down any second, but she´d kept fighting.

He couldn´t deny the fact that he was impressed.

The task he had set her had seemed impossible.

A hundred rounds on the running track without water in that tropical climate. Surely the pink haired female had to be on the verge of collapse.

He had actually waited for her to give up somewhere an hour ago, but she hadn´t.

He had expected her to beg him to let her stop about half an hour ago, but she hadn´t.

And although he had seen her struggle and stumble, although he´d even thought she was going to collapse at one point, she'd just kept going.

And even now, after she´d done so much more than what he´d originally asked of her, she still didn´t ask him to let her stop.

He discovered that she was impossible to break.

Her body might break at some point. Sure.

But it was impossible to break her mind.

And General Sephiroth Crescent realized that with every round she had kept going, she had gained a little bit more of his respect.

Maybe 120 rounds were enough after all.


She already felt light-headed and strained, ready to faint from dehydration and overexertion, felt unable to form a coherent thought anymore, but despite everything Claire Farron kept going.

She couldn´t remember what she was doing there anymore, or what she was doing it for, the only thing she knew for sure was that she had to keep going.

No matter what, she had to keep going.

The pink haired female felt dizzy and faint. Couldn´t even feel most of her body anymore, her sore feet heavy as lead as she tried to lift them one after the other. Her tortured muscles comlaining painfully, a stabbing headache searing every coherent thought, she was barely able to catch a proper breath anymore.

There were strange whooshing noises deafening her ears, and large dark dots clouding her vision, the track infront of her strangely blurred and then darkened. Fast.

It was when the tip of her boot got caught in a bump on the ground for what had to be the thousandth time, that the poor soldier was not able to regain her balance again. She didn´t even realize what was happening when suddenly her body hit the ground and she crushed into the dirt face-first.


She was panting heavily, barely able to catch her breath anymore and on the verge of passing out, he realized, when Sephiroth approached her.

She had pushed herself far beyond her limits. Or maybe he had. And it was then, that suddenly he felt a pang of guilt somewhere deep inside his chest. All the anger and the resentment he had held on to the past few days vanishing into thin air, he found sympathy and self-loathing taking its place.

Yes, he found he respected her.

For her endurance.

For her determination.

Her stubbornness.

For her patience with him.

Yes...

He knew he wasn´t exactly easy to deal with.

Kneeling down next to her broken form he carefully turned her around so her face wasn't covered by dirt and she could lie on her back to breathe freely. Her body was shaking and her limbs were slack. Her chest heaving madly, as her body tried to catch it´s breath.

Carefully the silver haired man brought his fingers to her wrist to check her racing pulse.

His eyes travelling to her dirty face, he saw that she had grazed her left cheek upon impact with the running track. A small trickle of blood making it´s way down her jawline and over to her chapped dry lips, he couldn´t help but notice the way her pinkish bangs stuck to her forehead, dripping with sweat, and how her eyelids fluttered weakly.

He studied her face a few seconds, then moved to gently lift her head.


Claire Farron felt like floating.

Found it very hard to stay in the present.

I need to get up and run...

I need to keep going...

I´m not done yet...

Those were the only thoughts that were cursing through her dizzy head.

All that came out of her mouth was a pittiful whimper.

She didn´t even realize that she was lying on the ground, her face burried in the dirt, when suddenly strong arms grabbed her to turn her on her back.

And it was before she knew what was going on that she felt her head being lifted by a gentle hand supporting the back of her neck and then something solid and cool pressing against her dry sore lips.

'Drink.'

It was an order.

Claire Farron tried very hard to obey.

But no matter how much she wanted to, the pink haired warrior, she couldn´t summon the strength to move another muscle, couldn´t find the strenght in her to even swallow.

She was too weak.

She was just done.

She slowly felt her consciousness slip away and it was only marginally that she perceived the soft touch of a hand, applying soothing cold water against her temples and onto her neck.

'Lightning, please drink.'

There was the pressure of the waterbottle against her lips again but the girl lying sprawled in the dirt of the running track with her head in her sensei's lap didn't even register it.

The girl in his arms didn't comply. Didn't even hear him.

Instead of swallowing the little water he had poured for her as he had intended, it just spilled over her lips and trickled down her chin to be greedily soaked up by the barren dried out ground.

Studying her sunburnt face, her pale chapped lips, her eratically heaving chest, the silver haired first class didn't look up when Angeal Hewlwy lowered himself to his knees right next to them.

'She won't drink.' the general stated stupidly.

He could feel Angeal's accusing gaze on him, could feel his disapproval, his blame, burning into the side of his head so hard it almost hurt.

Bending down he poured some of the water again, splashing it onto his apprentice's temples, neck and arms.

Her skin was dry and hot. So hot. Her chest still heaving, he saw her pulse racing away at her throat.

She did not really move though, did not open her eyes.

Damn it.

'Angeal!'

Finally looking up into his comrade's sky blue eyes he found the accusation gone, found only pitty there. Pitty for the girl presumably.

'Do something Angeal.'

It was not an order. It was a plea.

The burly first class only shook his head.

'She is not injured. There is nothing I can do.'

Oh, fuck it.

There was nothing for it.

Bending down and adjusting his footing the silver haird first class lifted the girl up into his arms before getting back on his feet, he carried her spent body back to sector 1.


'Was that really necessary?!' Angeal Hewley exclaimed in disgust as he followed his comrade and friend down to the Midgar hospital.

Yes. He was disgusted.

Disgusted and appalled by what his brother had done to the poor pink haired girl.

Sephiroth found that he was disgusted himself.

He knew what he´d done had been unfair. Unfair and wrong.

He didn´t know whether there was any excuse for his behaviour as he hurried to the emergency department of the Shin-Ra hospital.

He had been angry at her.

True.

Her behaviour had been wrong.

True.

But this...

His apprentice´s burning body shaking violently in his arms, with her arms and legs dangling limbly at her side, General Sephiroth Crescent knew that he had gone too far.

And he found that he couldn´t find an ounce of anger in his soul anymore.

Why had he been angry with her in the first place?!

Suddenly he didn´t know.

And suddenly he felt anxious. Anxious, worried and scared.

Overexertion and dehydration.

That was something Angeal´s spells couldn´t heal.

The girl in his arms was shaking feebly, was taking shallow ragged breaths. Her skin so hot it was uncomfortable to touch, Sephiroth knew the poor girl was burning up from the inside.

He'd made her run for hours in the scalding midday sun without a break or even a sip of water. What hat he expected? What had he been thinking?!

And he hadn´t been able to force a single drop of water into her unconscious body either...

Suddenly he was scared. Very scared.

If only he could have made her drink...

The silver haired first class knew this was bad. Bad indeed.

Pushing his way through the glassdoors of the emergency department, he lay his apprentice down on a vacated stretcher and grabbed the first doctor that he met roughly by his collar.

'There! Do something to help her!' he ordered impatiently.

The doctor´s eyes huge in horror, he quickly went and did as he was told.

'What... What happened to her?' the man asked somewhat shyly as he bent down to take her pulse and temperature and checked her eyes for reflexes with a little flashlight pen.

'Training incident.' Genesis Rhapsodos provided from behind his friends. His tiny book was still glasped in his perfectly manicured hands, a pink marker sticking out of it to mark his page.

'Those young foolish things... Thought she could go for a run in her lunch break in the middle of summer...'

Angeal Hewley threw the redhead an angry glare.

'It is my fault.' Sephiroth admitted quietly.

'I pushed her far too far.'

It was more to him that he had said it rather than anybody else and at the same time he knew that it was true.

This was his doing.

True he had expected her to ask him to stop before she would collapse, had expected her to plead with him to let her stop, to let her stay, on her knees. Had imagined himself taunting her for her weakness to then, mercifully as he was, let her stay.

Yes she should have asked him to let her stop. Or at least for a break. But then again, had she ever?

He'd pushed her limits a lot in training. Had crossed them on several occasions. He was aware. Still. Never had she asked him to stop. Not even once.

Claire Farron wasn't one to give up. Asking him to stop, for her it was out of the question and somehow the silver haired legend understood.

Wouldn't he have acted the exact same way?

'What in Gaia's name is going on here?!' There was a short hustle and bustle in the little crowd that had gathered around them and Genesis was unceremoniously shoved to the side and into a tiny cabinet as a stout and stern looking nurse pushed her way towards them.

The redhead didn't dare to complain.

The woman staring them all up and down in disapproval Sephiroth instantly knew she was not one to mess with. She had that manner that would silence any man, war hero or not, even Genesis Rhapsodos.

'Oh, good! Martha! Dehydration. Heat stroke. We need sodium lactate solution. Quickly. And maybe some ice packs.'

The woman nodded and made to rummage in one of the storage cupboards shoving Genesis out of the way again.

'Make some space you bigheaded idiots!' she yelled as she pushed the men away again so she would have some room.

The first classes complied.

'You stupid bigots. Just because you think you are gods you persume people are invincible.' She muttered under her breath as she set to work on Lightning's arm.

Genesis Rhapsodos was about to open his mouth in defense with no doubt some snide remark on his lush red lips but the corpulent nurse silenced him with just one stern look of her's.

'You idiots better keep your mouths shut!' she spat at them throwing them all warning glances before she turned back to her task at hand while they watched wide eyed and shell shocked as she inserted a needle into Lightnings arm to administer the IV.

'Excuse me Madam but...' Genesis began tentatively but he was cut off short when the woman turned around again and shoved him back against the cupboard once more.

'You!' she cursed. 'You have no idea!'

'I get this all the time!' she yelled pointing a gloved index finger at Claire Farron's unconscious form.

'Those pure blokes down in the emergency room with broken arms, broken legs, broken spines, cuts, gashes, internal injuries. They head out ready to get themselves killed just because you guys up there tell them to!'

Genesis had retreated further and further back against the cupboard had sucked in his belly too but there was no escaping the fierce woman's wrath.

Finding himself cornered, all he could do was put up his hands to protect his face as she advanced on him with her patient clipboard viciously slashing out at him.

'Nothing but fighting and killing and training all the time! For what? Ah yeah. Of course it's no big deal. After all you have us. We are the ones who have to stitch them back together. And when we can't they died for honor right? When will this nonesense stop?!' the woman raged hitting Genesis over the head with the clipboard, all the others staring in bewilderment.

'Ouch that hurts you know!' the redhead exclaimed desperately, trying to fend her off with his forearms.

'You can stop hitting him. It's all my fault.' Sephiroth finally stepped in.

'You!' The woman turned to point her finger at his chest like a sword.

The general's eyes widened and he brought up his hands reflexively to shield himself from her onslaught too while Angeal Hewley quickly stepped out of the way and made himself fade into the background.

'You are the worst of all of them!' she rounded on him now.

'M...Me?'

'Yes, you!' she went on.

'Those poor blokes keep seeing you on the news! Joining SOLDIER to become a hero. Getting slaughtered instead. Do you even realise what role model effect you have on them?'

The general's mako eyes went huge.

'I...I didn't...'

'THINK!' She raged. 'Yes! You guys never think!'

'Act first, think later... That poor girl.' she said, finally turning back to Lightning and helping the doctor apply the cool bags all over her scalding body.

'I'm sorry.' General Sephiroth said. And he felt it too.

Whatever had ridden him to drive Lightning to do all this, it was gone now. That ballooon of flaring anger had deflated and left only a deep pit of remorse, of disgust of hate towards himself.

'I'm really sorry. I didn't want...'

'Well you can tell her that. If she makes it, that is.' the woman said before picking up her clipboard she shoved Genesis out of the way one last time to leave for her next charge.

General Sephiroth Crescent stood there rooted to the spot, visibly trying to swallow the painful lump that seemed to have appeared in his throat at the woman's last words.

If she makes it, that is.

'This will probably take a while. I'm getting us some coffee.' Angeal announced and swiftly melted into the crowd leaving Genesis and Sephiroth alone as they kept watch at Lightning's bedside.

'That woman's definitely something.' Sephiroth said just to divert himself from the terrible clammy feeling that was still clasping him in tight fists.

'Well she said you were the worst of us all, you know.' Genesis said giving him a long suffering glance.

'She didn' hit you over the head though.'


'Okay. Its official. You're definitely the worst trainer ever.' Genesis announced as they sat around Claire Farron's bed sipping the coffee Angeal had provided and watching the steady flow of clear transparent fluid making it's way from the transfusion bag into Lightning's body.

Some caretakers had arrived a few minutes after the nurse had left and Lightning had been transferred to a bed in a cool and spacey air conditioned room.

There were still cooling bags spread all over her body and a beeping machine monitored her heartrate which was steady and strong and had mercifully almost gone back to normal.

'I mean you almost killed her.' the redhead said as if to underline Sephiroth's incompetence as a trainer.

The pink haired second class was sleeping soundly now in her hosital bed. No more shaking an panting. But her temperature still hadn't gone down completely.

Still the worst seemed overcome. Or at least he hoped so.

Sephiroth Creseent let Genesis' speech wash over him without a word.

It was true after all. He was the worst of trainers.

'And what's with all those bruises and stuff all the time. Are you two members of a BDSM club. I mean honestly. Thats disgusting.' the redhead taunted.

Angeal Hewley hadn't said a word since he had returned from the coffee machine but choose to reprimand him with one of his stern looks instead.

It was all true. It was disgusting the way he had been treating her.

Suddenly Sephiroth didn't know why he had been treating her like that in the first place.

He had abused her, had beaten her up, had hurt her, he'd even used Masamune on her lately. Why the fuck had he been doing that?

He'd let her anger out on her.

True. But what had she done really that warranted his harsh behaviour?

She had cut him with a knife. So what? He had cut her with his sword a hundred times. Fuck she had tried to shoot him with a gun in their very first training session and he hadn't been this angry.

No this wasn't about the incident with the knife at all. And he knew it.

He had been punishing her for his own incompetence. He had gotten inattentive, careless around her. And none of that was her fault, was it?

And then there was the thing she had pulled at Cloud's disciplinary hearing.

He had left HQ for days after that incident just to cool his temper. He would have killed her there and then had he seen her then. He would really have. He'd been so angry, been so disappointed. Been so hurt.

Had been angry at himself too, for all of it to effect him so strongly.

She had been so eager to leave him there. Hadn't seemed to care at all whether she'd leave or stay.

Her words kept replaying in his head, had come up a thousand times that past few days.

'It was me. I let in the wutai forces.'

Her set jawline, her determined expression. She had been so eager to take the blame on her, to serve her head on the chopping block like that, to throw everything away he had fought for for her. Her place in Shin-Ra. Her second class rank. The fact that they hadn't disposed of her after the wutai mission incident. She owed him for that.

Why? Why after all that trouble, after everything he'd done to help her, had she risked all that? Had she been so eager to leave Shin-Ra, to leave him?

It had been a slap to his face.

Or worse.

His ego.

Letting his gaze wander over his apprentice's unconscious form for the first time General Sephiroth Crescent took in all those half healed scars, all those bruises, all those cuts plus the new one on her cheek she had aquired as she had kissed the running track only a few hours before.

She owed all those to him too.

Genesis was right. He definitely was the worst of trainers.

They sat in Lightning's room in silence until Martha returned and ushered them out of the room brandishing her metal clipboard at them menacingly.


Back to the privacy of his quarters General Sephiroth Crescent found he couldn't relax, couldn't sleep.

And it wasn't only Lightning either. The fat nurse's words kept replaying themselves in his head, kept bothering him.

Was it true what she had said there?

Were people really joining the military because they saw his picture in the news? Because they wanted to be a hero like he was?

And if it were true indeed...

Was it really his responsibility?

His fault?

It wasn't as if he had had a choice there. He had never asked for this. Never asked for any of it.

What was he supposed to do? Let himself get killed to make an example?

Somehow the idea did not seem too appealing.

Tossing and turning in his sheets there was only one thing he knew for sure. If Lightning was going to turn out fine he would never ever dare to hurt her again.

Never ever.