'Claire! Look what I´ve found!'

Lightning could hear a female voice, calling for her as if from very far away.

She was inside her family´s old beach house in Bodhum, standing in the living room. The windows were open wide to let in the fresh sea breeze and the bright sunlight, flooding the whole room with a blinding white light.

She felt like floating.

Serah?

'Mum?! Claire?!'

It was that familiar voice again, closer now.

Yes.

It definitely was her sister's voice.

'Serah?!' Lightning called.

Feeling slightly disorientated in her parent´s beach house, she made to walk into the direction the sound had come from, to exit through the huge glass doors leading out onto the cozy porch overlooking the shore.

The sun was shining so brightly. Almost unnaturally so. It blinded her eyes like the headlights of a truck.

The pink haired woman took a deep breath of fresh air, savoring the sea breeze´s salty taste on the back of her tongue, the taste of home, as peacefully she listened to the sound of the waves.

Her vision slightly blurry, she managed to make out the small form of her sister, probably five years old, playing in the sand down by the shore, their mother approaching from the little vegetable patch behind the house.

'Mum?!' the pink haired first class gasped, as on whobbly floating feet, she made her way down to the beach.

Reaching the two of them, she quickly flung her arms around them.

She almost expected them to vanish the second that she touched them. But to her great surprise they both stayed rather solid.

She hugged them tightly, as if never planning to let go.

Feeling their arms around her, she couldn´t help but start to cry.

How long had it been since she had been hugged like that?

How long had it been since she´d last felt loved?

She let the tears run down her face freely. Tears she felt she´d been holding back for a very long time now.

'Claire! Why are you crying?!' came Serah´s tweety voice.

The tiny girl, she didn´t understand a thing.

Freeing herself from her older sister´s embrace, the young girl bent down to pick up something from the ground.

'Look what I´ve found!' she said again, as trying to catch her sister´s attention, she held up a green glowing, maxed out healing Materia.

To Lightning it looked strangely familiar.

'Oh that´s a beautiful toy now, isn´t it!' their mother said, looking down at the two of them with love shining in her eyes.

It was only then that Claire Farron realized she was only about 120 cm tall, her forehead barely reaching up to her mother´s chest.

'It must have gotten washed up by the tide!'

Lightning couldn´t help but feel slightly lost.

How had she arrived here?

It somehow felt as if she didn´t belong.

'Come on Claire!' Serah called, tugging at the hem of the yellow flower-patterned dress Lightning couldn´t remember putting on.

'Maybe there´s more of them! Let´s go and have a look!' the young girl pleaded, leading her sister further down the beach, their mother looking after them, eyes shining with love and care for them.

'Look! What´s that!?' Serah suddenly said coming to a halt and pointed at something longish and shiny, half buried in the sand a few meters away.

The girl in the yellow flower dress couldn´t make out what it was.

The edges of her vision strangely blurred, Lightning couldn´t discern the outlines of that foreign object.

If only the sun wouldn´t shine down so brightly!

Following her younger sister she decided to take a closer look.

Reaching the mysteriously gleaming thing, she realized it was a weapon, the shape of a familiar looking gunblade coming into focus.

'Blaze Edge?!'

The words left her mouth without her even realizing.

It were words that carried no meaning to her anymore.

'What is a Blaise Etch?' Serah asked.

The pink haired female just choose to ignore her as a funny feeling building in the pit of her stomach, she carefully extended a hand to touch it, letting her fingers glide over the weapon´s shiny smooth surface.

Something about this was strange.

Was wrong.

She had a feeling there was something she had forgotten. Something important.

Grabbing the sword´s hilt with both her tiny hands, she slowly tried to lift it. But it was no use. The weapon at her feet, it didn't even budge, was far too heavy for her tiny frame.

'Hahahah! You are too weak!' Serah giggled playfully.

You are too weak.

Claire was about to turn around to look at her, when suddenly she felt a sharp surge of pain, like a shock caused by an electric current, coming from the weapon lying at her feet, burning her fingers as gasping in pain, completely startled, she took a few steps backwards.

Coming to rest a few feet away she simply stared at it, unable to understand.

No matter how much she tried, how much she wanted to, she couldn´t seem to grasp the meaning of all this.

Then suddenly there was more pain.

A searing singeing pain starting in her right arm, then spreading over to her entire body.

Just a few moments later she was down on the ground writhing in agony.

There was a cold white light blinding her...

A creepy high pitched cackle in the background...

Turning to look, she realized Serah was gone. And so was the beach.

Instead of warm soft sand she felt the cold hard surface of metal press against her back.

Trying hard to focus on her surroundings, the pink haired woman fought to understand what was actually going on.

She didn´t know what had happened, where she was and how she´d gotten there, or even who she was.

The only thing she was sure of was the pain.

Her every muscle hurt so terribly.

And it seemed it wouldn´t stop there.

The pain, it seemed to grow, intensified, up to a point she thought she couldn´t bear anymore.

A blinding pain. It tore at her, ripped her, devoured her.

And then... Nothing.


'Lightning?'

Huh?

'Light?!'

Suddenly it was over and she felt the soothing contact of skin, of a soothing warm hand, gently resting on top of her own, squeezing her's softly.

Serah?

'S – Serah?'

It was all that she could manage. All that she could think of.

'No, it´s just me...' A gentle male voice. Talking to her as if from very very far away.

To her it sounded strangely familiar.

Then there was that pain again.

Torture.

Agony.

Blinding her.

Consuming her.

Almost killing her.

And then... Nothing again.

An emptiness. Swallowing her whole.

She felt like falling.

Falling endlessly.

Falling through a bottomless pit.

A wormhole, connecting that strange place to reality.

Until finally she woke up to more pain.

Pain and light.

And eyes...

Kind, sky-blue puppy eyes staring at her, wide with concern.

'Z-Zack?!'


It was about ten weeks after the incident at the beach of Costa del Sol, that finally Claire Farron woke up to the yellow painted walls of a neatly furnished hospital room. Her left hand almost crushed under Zack Fair's tight grip, the first thing she saw were his beautiful sky blue eyes.

Her black haired friend didn´t seem to care for the various IV´s going into her body as he tackled his comrade in a tight hug the second his name left her lips.

She could make out Angeal, Genesis and Cloud gathered around her bed as well. And tears... There were tears running down Zack Fair´s cheeks. They were tears of relief.

Lightning didn´t immediately understand the meaning of all of this.

The fact that she had been in a coma for months, that she had in fact almost died, for the pink haired female it was hard to grasp.

The last thing she remembered was eating maki on the ride from Junon.

Everybody was so happy to see her come around, relief etched all over her comrade´s faces, Lightning found it felt so good to have them there.

It didn´t take her long to realize that one face was missing though.

Sephiroth.

Her silver haired former mentor was no where to be seen. Lightning felt her heart drop.

Still.

Although his absence pained her, and more than she would have liked to admit too, it didn´t exactly come as a surprise.

They hadn't exactly left on friendly terms last time they had met in seventh heaven, Lightning was aware. She had turned him down at seventh heaven, him and his feeble appologies, his petty advances. Hadn't she? Yes, she had. He could save those for his fangirls. That much was for sure.

But still... Still. He had still been her trainer. Her sensei. He was her comrade, was her general. Shouldn't he be there as well? Shouldn't he at least check on her?

He should. Somehow Lightning felt he should.

Well, he probably had more important stuff to tend to...

He was an important person after all with lots of tasks and responsibilities. Yes, that had to be it. Maybe he was on one of his mission or in a briefing with director Lazard.

Whatever it was his shedule was probably full, his head buzzing with important stuff from his to do list.

Of course he couldn't waste a thought on her.

She was just Claire Farron.

Wasn't anything special at least not to him, and she'd do better to stop to expect it, to stop wishing for it or whatever it was that she did all the time.

Yes.

Maybe she should just accept it. The fact that he was him and she was herself and that General Sephiroth Crescent didn't care for her, at least not in the way she wanted him to and that this was a fact that was never going to change.

Maybe she should just accept things as they were and move on with her life.

Yes she should.

It definitely was what she should do.

And it was what she would do.

This was her second chance at life was it not? She had almost died. And somehow miraculously she'd been granted a second chance.

She couldn't afford to waste it.

Not with stupid infatuations, with unrealistic hopes and wasted opportunities.

And she wouldn't.

No.

She so wouldn't.

This man so wasn't worth her trouble, wasn't worth her tears. She had enough friends as it was. Zack and Cloud and Genesis and Angeal. They had all come. Had all gathered around her. And from now on she would focus on those. Those four people who made her happy. Those four people who cared.

If General Sephiroth Crescent couldn't spare some precious minutes of his time to visit her in hospital then she decided that she could not care less.


Little did Claire Farron know that the man of her musings was standing outside the room at that very moment, witnessing the scene through the little glass insert of the door, his mako gaze resting on the back of Zack Fair's hand, that hand that never left her own.

General Sephiroth Crescent didn´t know what that bastard Hojo had done to him this time and he certainly didn´t know how he had managed to make it out of there alive. But whatever it had been the professor had injected, it definitely had been worse than anything he had ever received before.

He didn´t know how long he had been down there in Hojo´s power this time.

His memories were hazy.

He had no idea how long he´d been out.

The first thing he could remember was that eventually he woke up, shivering against the stainless steeled surface of the operation table under his exposed torso...

The room was empty, his arms released and Professor Hojo was gone.

He was alone.

He felt weak and worn, exhausted, ready to faint again.

His body barely able to move, the general knew this might be his only chance of escape.

He´d better not waste it.

He knew he had to get out of there. And do so now. Before the professor would return.

Carefully forcing his sluggish body into a sitting position he made to get up, just to tumble to the floor in a heap of limbs, his legs too weak to support his weight.

Every muscle in his body complaining painfully, the general made his way over to the door on hands and knees and it was only with huge effort that he managed to grab his coat that lay neatly folded on a chair on his way out.

He put it on with difficulty, a futile attempt at sheltering his body from the chilly air.

He was about to leave the lab when his eyes cought on something shimmering and green lying displayed on one of the desks.

It was a set of mako injections. Five to be precise. They simply lay there as if waiting for him, in a handy tiny leather case, beckoning him to move over.

It was only a moment that he hesitated.

Making his way over on his hands and knees he quickly made to pocket them.

He didn´t know how he did it nor how long it took him, but somehow he made it back to the elevators and up to the SOLDIER floor.

It had to have been late in the night for he didn´t meet anybody on the way up to his apartment, something he was rather thankful for.

The last thing that he needed now was for some asshole like President Shin-Ra or director Lazard to see him in that state. No. He'd rather have snuffed it.

It was a considerate amount of time later that he finally managed to heave his body to the safety of his private quarters, just to collapse and pass out halfway into the living room, unable to get up again.

He remembered hoping that maybe somebody would notice his absence, Genesis or Angeal maybe, or even Zack, that somebody would eventually check on him and find him there, to actually help him, to save him... But no matter how many hours passed, nobody seemed to care.

Nobody came.

He had no idea how long it took him to regain consciousness this time, but it was a bright sunny morning when he woke up on the hard linoleum floor of his living room. Every muscle in his body burning like hell, he felt ready to faint the second he opened his eyes.

His throat sore and his head hurting as though it was going to split in two any second soon, the general knew he needed something to eat or at least some water.

Yes, his body needed something to drink. Desperately so.

It took him ages to make it over to the kitchen, to pull himself up the kitchen counter.

The first glass of water he managed to pour from the sink shattered on the floor as it slipped out of his shaking hands.

He needed some time to regain his strengh enough for a second attempt.

He succeeded this time. Downing the contents of his glass in a few needy gulps, he waited at the kitchen floor for his body to somewhat recover.

His Jenova cells reluctant to help him out this time, the general savoured the cold water soothing his pounding headache.

Damn Hojo...

It took him another twenty minutes to make his way over to the fridge and find something to eat.

He managed to keep the food inside at the third attempt.

Then finally he made his way into the bathroom and under the shower.

He didn´t remember how long he stayed in there.

Time had lost meaning to him.

For hours he just sat in the corner of the shower with his back against the wall.

Hugging his knees to his chest, he let the hot water soothe his pain, his physical as well as the other one... The one in his mind, his heart. The one threatening to consume him, to overwhelm him, ever since he had set foot into that underground nightmare again.

All the suppressed memories of his youth, all those horrible experiences, images, flashes, those secrets he had somehow managed to lock away deep inside of him for the past few years, threatening to resurface, haunting him, making him feel like the helpless child he used to be. Just a defenseless child. Entirely at Hojo´s mercy.

Suddenly he felt he couldn´t handle them anymore.

He let them spill out through his eyes, let the currents of hot water running over his badly shaking body take them, wash them away and flush them down the drain.


It was late afternoon when finally General Sephiroth Crescent managed to get himself together enough to make his way down to the hospital.

He still felt like shit, but he needed to check on Lightning. Needed to make sure Hojo had kept his promise. Needed to make sure she was alright, that all he´d gone through hadn´t been in vain. Needed to see her safe, to touch her skin, needed to feel their connection, their special bond, longed to feel her presence. Needed her close.

He was about to enter the room the nurse had pointed out to him, when he saw her there in her bed through the tiny glass inlet in the door.

She was propped up on a pillow, well and awake, the others gathered around her, talking cheerfully.

His fingers resting on the doorknob, the general paused in his actions.

Her unexpected awakening had taked him by surprise.

And so had the presence of the others.

On one hand he felt relieved, so infinitely relieved to finally see her awake, to know that she was alright, that she was going to be okay. But on the other side...

He had gotten used to sitting next to her, to be close to her, to hold her hand.

Suddenly he realised that all this time he'd sat with her, she hadn´t been aware, hadn´t been with him, couldn´t possibly remember.

She had been unconscious of course, knew nothing of the things that had ensued. And somehow it was good. Would save her so much pain and trouble. And somehow it just hurt, the realisation of the fact that she didn't know he'd sat there with her, that she didn't know what he had gone through to make sure she'd be safe.

Watching closer from his safe side of the door, the general's mako gaze fell onto Zack, who, sitting on the edge of her mattress, leant in to remove a few strands of pinkish hair that had fallen into her face and tugged them behind her ear.

Mako killer eyes following his fellow first class´s actions like a hawk's, the silver haired legend caught a glimpse of Zack Fair's other hand gently cupping her´s. Their fingers intertwined, he found Lightning smiling up at Zack in a loving and appreciative kind of way.

General Sephiroth Crescent felt his chest constricting painfully.

Suddenly he felt betrayed.

Wasn´t he supposed to be the one to hold her hand in there?

Wasn't he supposed to be the one she smiled at?

It had been him who'd saved her.

Him. Not Zack...

He had been holding her hand down there for months.

Not Zack!

He had almost given his life down there in exchange for her safety. Shit he wasn't even sure then what it was exactly he had given Hojo in return!

Still it was Zack´s hand she was holding. Not his. Never his.

General Sephiroth Crescent suddenly felt unable to breathe.

Letting his hand drop away from the doorknob as if burned, he slowly started to take a few steps away.

No. He couldn't possibly go in there. Couldn't stand there next to Zack and watch the two of them. Acting as though all of this was just alright. Couldn't face Lightning's smiles or Angeal's knowing glances. Watch giving the impression than all of it was fine with him... Impossible. How was he supposed to pull that off?!

Not knowing what else to do the silver haired first class turned around and made to leave.

Ligthning had seemed happy in there.

Had seemed happy with Zack's hand around her's. Happy with their fingers intertwined.

Happy with her friends there watching, smiling at her encouragingly.

Who was he to interfere?

Who was he to cloud the cheery mood?

She was happy and well. That much he knew now. And it was really all that mattered. Was all that really counted.


It was long after midnight that finally the general returned to enter the pink haired femal's hospital room.

He had been planning to stay away from her. Had been plannin to leave her be. To keep his distance, to keep his feelings in check, and his love a secret.

Still. Something deep inside him kept pulling him back to her. The urge to go and see her had become more and more unbearable the longer that he stayed away, had become irresistable, painful even.

He just needed to see her, just needed to feel her close.

Just one last final time. Then he would go. Would leave her to her own stuff. And would not look back even once. Well... At least that was what he was planning.

It was dark in there with even the lights in the corridors dimmed and it was really just the light coming from the moon, the stars, shining through the windows that made to guide his way.

Crossing the distance to her bedside without the tiniests of sounds, Sephiroth carefully seated himself in the chair next to her bed just to study her relaxed features, to watch her stirring softly in her sleep.

The moon giving her features an unnaturally silver glow, it was nonetheless that the woman infront of him looked carefree, looked relaxed. She was asleep of course. Just like she'd been all those times down in deepground, still her face looked different now. At ease, untroubled. Peaceful.

It was taking in every inch of his comrade's sleeping face, that the general leaned foreward.

If only he could touch her. If only he could feel the reassurance of their secret special bond. Just for a tiny moment...

His hand reaching forward tentatively, it was with utmost self control that he resisted the urge to take her hand.

He couldn´t risk disturbing her. Couldn't risk her waking up. She would not want it, any of it, he was sure. Would be shocked to wake up and find him sitting with her even.

The thought of it made sitting there feel wrong, made the purpose of his whole visite seem creepy and objectionable. Just plain wrong.

And somehow it was.

Still... Staying away from her like this, suddenly it seemed like hard work.

He´d gotten so used to feel her skin on his, to feel the reassurance of their bond.

Still. She wouldn't want him to. Wouldn't want him to at all. Had never wanted him to begin with. She had made herself clear on that that time in seventh heaven, hadn't she?

She had. It had been stupid of him to believe that she would change her mind at Corel, had been stupid of him to think that she would change her mind now. And with the way he'd treated her in the past, all the things he'd done to her now that she didn't even know about, she had really every right to hate him.

The Jenova cells in his body complaining disappointedly, craving the reunion, the general had a hard time bringning his hands back to his lap. Felt them twitching there uncomfortably.

Lightning...

It was funny how just a few days ago he would have given everything to be able to see her come around,everything to talk to her, to look into her eyes, afraid she would never ever wake up again, and now... Now that he knew he could wake her with just a touch of his hand, he suddenly didn´t want her to anymore. Dreaded her waking up really. Dreaded her finding him there sitting at her side. Dreaded the way she'd look at him. Dreaded the way she would react, had he dared to touch her.

The truth was Claire Farron didn't want him. Had never wanted him. Claire Farron wanted Zack. And the way that she'd smiled up at him while they had sat there holding hands, it would haunt the general for the rest of his life.


Her body recovering only agonizingly slowly, Lightning spent the next few weeks in her hospital room.

Nobody wanted to talk about what had really happened back when she had gotten injured in Costa del Sol and the pink haired first class didn't really push it.

Lightning herself didn´t exactly remember much, a big junk of her memory missing, there was nothing but a gaping hole where that incident on the beach should have been.

Somehow she wasn´t sorry. From what she had heard it had been pretty horrible. She was kind of thankful she was spared the mental pictures from haunting her dreams all night.

Still, time passed fast. Hours melted into days. And days turned into weeks. Spring had ended and turned into early summer, and still Lightning had not been released, causing her to spend her birthday in the hospital as well, an opportunity the others didn´t want to let pass.

Lightning hadn´t even given it a thought. She hadn´t bothered to celebrate her birthday ever since she had joined SOLDIER and she certainly hadn´t planned to do so this time but her friend Zack Fair had gotten wind of the special date from the hospital wrist tag on her arm and Zack Fair wouldn't have been Zack Fair if she was not to be surprised with a little birthday party in the hospital´s recreation room on the sunny afternoon of the 13th of May.

'How are you feeling today?' Zack Fair asked, helping his unsuspecting comrade up from her bed and into her dressing gown to cover the nightshirt she had been provided with by the hospital.

Claire Farron hadn´t missed the fact that her dark haired friend seemed especially joyful that day.

It was all the forwarning that she had.

'I´m a lot better, I think.' Lightning assured him, throwing him a curious suspecting look as Zack leaned down to close her gown and offered her his arm for support.

Looking up at him with question, her comrade only smiled secretively.

Somehow the pink haired first class couldn´t help but notice how he seemed to care for her a lot recently. Maybe a tiny bit too much, considering that they were only friends, comrades really.

'Where is it that you are taking me exactly?' Lightning asked somewhat warily, as leaning heavily on her comrade´s offered arm, she let Zack Fair support her out of her quarters and out into the corridor.

'Just the recreation room...' Her comrade answered, trying to sound nonchalant, and failing spectacularily.

'Wait. Why are we going there?'

Realisation beginning to dawn on her, the pink haired female suddenly stopped dead in her tracks. That familiar sense of foreboding rising in her chest, she felt the urge to just go back and hide inside her room.

There was really only one resaon for them to go to the recreation room. Only one reason for Zack to act all that secretive.

'No. No way. You haven't... You wouldn't... ' the pink haired female started to protest.

'Please lets go back... I don´t want to...' she stammered, looking at her friend with big blue pleading eyes.

'Oh, come on!' Zack persuaded playfully as gently grabbing her wrist he tugged her towards the doors of that damned room, before his friend had any chance to escape.

He was lucky she was still feeling weak.

'You really should go inside and check it out!'

There was mischief written all over the young man´s face.

Oh Zack...

Lightning hardly dared to touch the doorknob.

Pushing it open only tentatively, she found herself greeted by a small crowd of familiar faces wearing colourful party hats and yelling 'HAPPY BIRTHDAY!' into her face at the top of their lungs.

Suddenly she was glad Zack was right behind her to keep her from tumbling backwards.

For a moment it was all too overwhelming and it was completely startled that the pink haired female stumbled into him.

Her heart skipping a beat or two, Lightning couldn´t keep a blush from creeping onto her cheeks when she found his warm strong arms coming up to steady her from behind.

There was that tiny part of her that reminded her of that one time in the simulation training room, that one time they had danced on new year's eve, that part that didn´t want him to let go.

But there was no time to dwell on any of it as Cloud stepped forward to put a pink striped party hat on the top of her head and Zack Fair pushed her forwards, gently, to finally step inside.

It was on slightly unsteady feet that Claire Farron complied. Taking in her new surroudings her icy blue eyes made to scan the room.

Entering that room was like stepping out of the hospital and entering a dream.

Her comrades had spared no effort to decorate and transform the recreation room into a party tent it seemed.

Multicolored paper party garlands dangling from the ceilings, tons of glittering confetti littering the floor and covering every surface obtainable, there were huge pink letters sticking to the wall spelling: 'Happy Birthday, Light!'

It was both, a birthday and a welcome back party. And Lightning almost could not believe how many people had shown up to celebrate with her.

One by one the guest came forwards to congratulate her.

Claire Farron found herself lost for words.

Lightning even received presents. A book from Genesis (a selection of the last century´s best poems) and a handy double bladed throwing knife from Zack and Cloud.

The pink haired first class amost couldn´t believe it.

She hadn´t received a birthday present since her mother had died.

Angeal Hewley had outdone himself too. There was an enormously sized chocolate cake resting on a big round table placed in the middle of the room, big enough to feed an army and mouthwatering to even look at. And Tifa seemed to kindly have supplied the party with drinks from her bar.

Still. The presence of all her friends, being surrounded by all the kind familiar faces, it was the best present Lightning could have imagined.

Everybody seemed to be there to celebrate her special day. Everyone but Sephiroth.

Lightning couldn't help but notice that her former mentor was missing once again.

She hadn´t seen him a single time since she had come around.

He hadn´t visited even once. Hadn't cared to check on her at all. And somehow, despite having promised herself that she would stop caring, Lightning coulnd't help but feel disappointed by his absence.

Didn't he care to find out how she felt at all?

Didn't he wonder how she was doing?

Well. It certainly didn't seem the case.

What had she expected?

Flowers? A get well card?

Somehow Lightning wasn't sure.

It was quickly that she brushed the thought away.

We are talking about Sephiroth after all.

Coming to think of it she realized somebody else was missing as well.

'Where is Aerith?!' she asked curiously as scanning the crowd for the girl's pink dress once more, she waited for somebody to answer.

Lightning wasn´t exactly sorry for the flower girl's absence to be honest, but still, it was very unusual for her to miss a party. And a party thrown by Zack on tops.

Nobody volunteered to anser.

Instead an awkward silence seemed to have befallen the people around her and it was a few moment later that her eyes searchingly went for Zack´s.

'Oh... Uhm nobody told you? ' her dark haired friend began somewhat tentatively.

'Aerith and I... Well... We aren´t exactly together anymore.'

Lightning found his eyes fixed on something outside the window, found his hand awkwardly combing through his hair.

'What! Why?!' Lightning blurted out, looking over at Cloud and Tifa, then back at Zack again, waiting for some kind of explanation.

'What happened?' she pressed on when nobody seemed eager to reply.

'Well she kind of caught me fooling around with Cissnei...' Zack confessed, sneaking a careful sideward glance at his female friend to check on her reaction before carefully averting his eyes again.

Lightning found his cheeks flush crimson.

'Cissnei from the Turks?' she asked, surprise dripping from her voice.

Somehow she could not believe it.

Lightning knew Zack liked to be flirty with girls but this... She´d thought he and Aerith were in love! Thought the two'd been made for each other. Never would she have expected something like this to happen.

How could things have changed so fast?

How long had she been gone exactly?!

'Yeah... Her...' Zack confessed, bringing up his hand to scratch the back of his head in embarrassment.

'But isn´t she with Tseng?' Claire Farron asked incredulously.

'Yeah... She is...' Cloud was eager to answer this one, unable to contain his mirth.

'Can´t wait till he finds out!'


It was when she finally made her way back to her room, exhausted and worn from the eventful afternoon, tired but still happy, that she found it resting on her bed side table: A single beautiful red rose, it´s lush crimson petals like silk under the touch of her curious fingertips.

Caught by surprise, Claire Farron carefully picked it up to look at it. Taking in it´s lovely fragrance, she couldn´t help but admire it´s beauty. She hadn´t seen anything like it in Midgar before. Come to think about it, she hadn´t seen any flowers in this place at all.

Searching for a message or any kind of hint at the sender, the pink haired female came up empty handed. Wondering who could have placed it there, she decided to put it in a glass of water.

Red roses meant...

She almost didn´t notice Zack enter the room.

Almost.

'Hey Zack... Did you put that flower on my nightstand?' Lightgning asked, her pale cheeks blushing slightly.

'Uhh...No...!?' her friend answered somewhat carefully, scrutinizing the tiny plant on his comrade's bedside table with wary sky blue eyes.

Lightning furrowed her brow at him.

'Seems like you have a secret admirer out there...' Zack began teasingly, the smile on his lips failing to reach his eyes. Sky blue eyes that eyed the red rose like a hawk.

'If that´s supposed to be one of Cloud and your jokes, it really isn´t funny...' his comrade began, readying herself for one of Zack Fair's rants.

It never came.

Instead her dark haired friend seemed rather puzzled.

'No! Are you crazy?! It wasn´t me...I swear!' He said putting his hands up in the air defiantly.

'I wouldn´t even know where to get something like this here in Midgar! Not even with Aerith's help. It must have cost a fortune!'

Pondering his words, Lightning figured he was probably right.

'How could I have put it in here anyway? I was with you there in the recreation room all the time!' he reasoned. 'We all were!'

Well... He definitely had a point there.

'Maybe it was that creep Reno.' he added on a second thought.

Lightning wondered...

Reno had made her expensive gifts in the past hadn't he?

Still... He hadn't come to visit even once. Hadn't attended her birthday party.

Lightning had hoped that after their disastrous dance scene at Costa del Sol he had finally given up on her.

'Well actually I came back inside to hand you that letter...' Zack began again, sounding a little bit hurt and pulling a dirty creased envelope out of his pants and handing it to her.

Lightning could make out her sister´s quirky handwriting on it´s washed out front.

'It arrived for you some days ago.'

Serah...

Never before had she received a letter from her. Never once had her sister written back.

And she hadn't written in quite some time either.

Being in coma and everything, Lightning hadn´t even been able to write to her for her birthday.

Shit.

'It's from Serah.' She said somewhat taken aback.

Hesitantly accepting her mail, she dropped it into her lap, staring at it as though afraid it might burst into flames any second.

'I´ll leave you to it then...' Zack bent down to whisper into her ear.

His hand coming up to touch her shoulder, resting there for a tiny minute, Lightning felt his thumb tracing soothing patterns through the fabric of her hospital gown.

The pink haired first class didn´t know when they had become that close. Still... It wasn´t an unpleasant sensation at all.

She felt a strange feeling of loss when finally Zack stepped away.

'Call me whenever you need anything...' her comrade said, then quickly left the room.

She hadn´t even thought to thank him...

The woman´s blue eyes following her friend's retreating back, they rested on the spot he vanished for another few minutes, before finally she looked back at the envelope inside her lap.

She had never received a letter from Serah before.

She hadn't exactly thought much about it, had assumed Serah was still angry with her for leaving her behind, for sending her to boarding school.

Having nothing else to do, she slowly made to open the envelope, tears streaming down her face as she made to read the familiar handwriting.

My beloved Sister,

I haven´t heard from you in months, and at this point I can only hope that you are doing alright. I don´t know why I haven´t written to you earlier... I think I was just too angry at you for leaving me here.

Please forgive me, I was only a child. I didn´t understand.

I know you are very busy and I appreciate everything you have done for me. Still I miss you. And I would love to see you again soon, especially as I am writing to inform you that I have met somebody. His name is Snow Villiers and we are planning to get married soon.

I´m sure you´d actually like him. He is leader of the neighborhood watch group here in Bodhum.

I really, really wish you could visit, at least for my wedding. It would mean so much to me.

Please reply soon.

I hope you are alright!

Please know that I love you!

Kisses, Serah

Wiping her tears on the sleeve of her gown, Claire Farron reread the letter again and again, waited for the words to sink in.

Still, after what had to have been the hundreth time she still couldn´t believe all the things it contained.

Serah... Her little sister... Getting married?! She was only a child!

No she was not...

She was 18 years already.

Lightning just hadn´t been there to see her grow up.

Where the fuck had she been all those years?!

How come she hadn't noticed her sister had grown up?!

But of course. Serah was a woman now. She was well and happy. She was in love. She even wanted to get married. She was probably going to have kids soon.

Wasn´t that what she had wanted? For Serah to be happy? For her to lead a normal life?

It was...

But the joy, the happiness, she had expected to feel at seeing that everything she had sacrificed had been given up for a reason, that finally she had accomplished her mission, failed to arise.

Serah didn't need her anymore.

It took a few moments for that fact to sink in.

Somehow left without a purpose, Claire Farron felt lost.

Her mission was accomplished. She was free. Serah was an adult and was able to look after herself now. How could she have forgotten?

Somehow in her mind Serah had always stayed the small helpless girl she had been when Lightning had last seen her. But of course she wasn't anymore.

Serah had grown up too. And now she didn't need Lightning's support anymore, there was no reason for the pink haired female anymore to stay with Shin-Ra, was there?

No. She could leave. Could do anything she wanted. Could make real use of the second chance she'd been given, could start over for real.

But what should she do? Where should she go?

Claire Farron had no goals left for herself, no dreams. She had relinquished them in order to provide a decent life for her sister. For Serah.

Never had she thought about what would become of her once Serah was grown up.

Now that Serah was safe and ready to look after herself, what was there left for her to do?

Maybe she should just go home, a tiny voice inside her head suggested

Serah wanted her to go home, didn't she? She'd asked her to come in her letter.

And what? Leave all her friends behind? Her duties? Another voice protested instantly.

That one was much louder then the other.

She was in SOLDIER now. She couldn't just go home and leave her friends or could she?

It was true Serah was her family, her blood. But all the others, Zack and Cloud and Genesis and Angeal. Sephiroth. They were her family too, weren't they?

Surely she couldn't just leve them behind, not with the wutai war and everything. She had duties after all. And she had honor. Didn't she?

Yes, she did.

And also there was more.

She couldn´t just go back home and pretend. Pretend that she was still the same. Pretend that she was normal, carefree and unscathed like Serah was.

She couldn't just go back to Bodhum, go back to her old life of living in her parent's beach house and hanging around with her friends from the neighbourhood watch eating seafood.

There simply was no way.

She couldn´t.

It wasn't her anymore.

Life had changed her. SOLDIER had changed her. Midgar had changed her.

This was where she belonged now.

This was her destiny.