Here we are for chapter 3! I was thinking about doing this tomorrow, but a friend of mine was hungry for MORE. So I had to simply write this quick. And yes, the chapter is referring to who you think it is...now on with the chapter!

DISCLAIMER: I do not own Naruto, its characters, locations, and all that stuff. That belongs to Masashi Kishimoto, Shueisha, Viz Media, TV Tokyo Co., and Shonen Jump, and other content creators who would jump at the chance to copyright murder me if given the opportunity. Now STFU you darn copyright Nazis! And to the rest...enjoy :D


Chapter 3: Too Old for This Shit

The Unnamed, now completed bridge, Land of Wave

The group, along with Inari, Tazuna, and his daughter Tsunami, plus the Mist duo, were standing on the Wave side of the bridge. Reason being was now all the members had recovered enough so that now they could leave the country and in the case of the Konoha ninja, go home.

However, Kakashi couldn't help but ask Zabuza "So...what are you going to do next."

Zabuza paused for a moment and said "Well...maybe we could ally with Leaf and get them to help us with another attempt on the Mizukage?"

Kakashi deadpanned at him for a moment before he asked "Whhhyyy?"

Zabuza looked at him straight in the eye before he replied "Ok, let me ask you. Would you want to work for a murderous psychopath who kills innocent people just because they either happen to have a unique ability or two, decide to speak against him, or just simply not like him?"

Kakashi was still for a moment before he said "Fair point...who knows, maybe after your failed assassination attempt they raised a rebellion or something?"

Zabuza then added "If they did, I'd be impressed. There hasn't been any successful ones yet."


Elsewhere

Speaking of, at that moment in time, the busty Mei Terumi had raised her rebellion against Yagura, and so far was doing better than any of the previous tries so far. Guess can't send a man to do a woman's job in that case then?


Back at the bridge

In any case though, the group said their goodbyes to each other, and while they tried not to, both Naruto and Inari were crying like children at the end.

Sasuke said in response "Dobe, you really can't hold it in until after we're away from them?"

Naruto, wiping away his tears retorted "Hey, its called I have feelings, and I spent a lot more time with them than you did."

Sasuke looked away, a hint of a smile on his face as he said "True enough..and it could be worse, you could cry at every goodbye or sob story. Or mope at every unfortunate event."

Naruto couldn't help but say to that "...fair point."

Somewhere in the afterlife one such person couldn't help but sit in a corner moping at how the current generation were treating him.

Before long the group then started making their way back towards Konoha, chatting with each other along the way. Haku and Naruto ended up getting along due to similar personalities to each other, Sasuke basically tolerated everyone from what Naruto saw, and meanwhile Kakashi and Zabuza ended up sharing some of their feats...the majority of Zabuza's being as Naruto put it...overkill.

Haku nudged him as she said "Well you were the one to say no kill like overkill, right?"

Naruto simply shrugged as he said "Fair enough."

Naruto then asked her "By the way, why did you say you were male before?"

Haku paused for a moment before she said "Well, first off there was what Gato said, then there's how villages like Kumo with how they treat their bloodlines...trust me you don't want to know."

Naruto nodded, he at least remembered a few things from his classes. One of which was that Kumo was well known for being power hungry, and very treacherous when it came to bloodline ninjas.

Haku then added "Lastly...I tend to enjoy a prank or two. I will admit the look on your face was quite enjoyable. I've even tricked Zabuza once or twice with a good one"

Zabuza overheard this before he said "Haku...don't remind me…"

Naruto at this point asked "...want to hear about my pranks?"

Haku then smiled, but not a nice smile, more like a smirk instead.

"I'm listening"

Meanwhile one thought was going through Zabuza and Kakashi's heads.

Oh no...not another one…

Meanwhile Minato couldn't help but enjoy the conversations...and also thinking back to the few times Kushina pulled him into her prank sprees, he was definitely sure Naruto got her love of pranks from her...especially considering a few of his ended up being similar, except the fact Naruto enjoyed the use of orange paint rather than red. Though he did have to give Naruto props for the Hokage mountain one. He set that one up perfectly, aside from the 'getting caught' part.

After a bit more of conversing, Haku ended up walking alongside Zabuza so she could talk with him for a bit.

Zabuza said "So, seems you're making new friends...especially that Uzumaki boy."

Haku nodded as she said "Indeed, they're pleasant people, especially Naruto."

Zabuza then hummed a moment before he said "So...got something on you mind?"

Haku let a grin come to her mouth. She then checked to make sure the blond boy wasn't paying attention to them. He apparently was having his own little conversation with Sakura, who was a bit curious about how his body was affected.

Upon confirmation, Haku whispered to Zabuza "Remember how I put Sasuke to near death?"

Zabuza looked a bit confused before asking her "Yes, why?"

Haku whispered "I was actually trying to kill him, but apparently, I misjudged where a thing or two was. And I made sure to specifically target HIS vitals."

Zabuza paused for a moment before he ended up nearly laughing his butt off at the information Haku gave him.

If that's the case, now I have another reason to follow these brats...for my AMUSEMENT! He thought as the info sat into his mind. This was just as good as the info that Naruto was the son of the 4th Hokage if what he heard about Uchiha boys and their tendency to draw in fangirls was true.

The only other one who picked up on their little conversation was Kakashi, who simply thought Well, seems they'll probably enjoy themselves in Leaf.

It was at this point Naruto went over to Kakashi as he said "You know, it's a lot more different spending time in nature now that my senses are better."

Kakashi decided to oblige the boy with conversation as he said "Is that so?"

Naruto replied, "All the smells, sounds, and all that get so much more pronounced...weird thing is though that for some reason...Sasuke smells more like Sakura does in comparison. Maybe just they use similar soap or something?"

Kakashi just simply noted "I see."

In the back of his mind though he started to wonder if he would win his bet with the Sandaime on how long it would take people, particularly the loudmouth Naruto, would realize Sasuke's little secret. But that could be put aside for now.

After all, he said in the middle of the chunin exams it would happen. And he was really hoping that would be the case. After all...both of them had something on the line.


A bit later on, like a little less than a week or so.

Hokage's office, Konohagakure, Land of Fire

The Third stared at the group that was the current generation's Team 7, plus the extra two ninja that were missing nin Zabuza Momochi, and Haku, technically a nin with no affiliation other than Zabuza. Only two of his trusted Anbu were in the room, going between keeping an eye on these two in particular...and the fact that after securing the room Naruto dispelled his transformation jutsu so that they could see the changes in Naruto's body while Kakashi explained. It was a bit of a shock for them.

Other than the Anbu though, there was none other than the big, white haired man none other than the Toad Sage Jiraya, self proclaimed Mega Pervert, author of the Icha-Icha series, and one of Konoha's strongest shinobi besides himself. He didn't count the other two sannin since one had turned into a mad scientist traitor and the other simply drank and gambled away any money sent to her while refusing to come back to the village. He could live with Jiraya since unlike those two, he stayed loyal.

The Sandaime then spoke "So let me get this straight...you want me to believe that Minato screwed up in his seal that resulted in Naruto gaining this...form, while also causing Minato's soul to somehow be pulled out of the Dead Demon Consuming Seal and into his...and that these two here became your allies and now want to work with us in order to eventually get rid of Yagura as the Mizukage?"

Kakashi responded "Yes sir."

The Sandaime then said "Jiraya, I suggest you check the seal to be sure."

The man then nodded, but before he got the chance, Minato spoke to Naruto.

"Hey Naruto, I want to try something here. That okay with you?"

Uh sure? Naruto thought in mind speak. It was something his father had been working on with him.

Naruto afterwards then said "Wait a second, I want to try something here."

Jiraya looked over at the Third who simply nodded. He wanted to at least give the boy some leeway, considering to him, Naruto was like a grandson aside from Konohamaru.

Naruto then according to his father's instructions made a shadow clone.

But then the shadow clones eyes flashed for a second, and he then proceeded to use the transformation jutsu, appearing as the Fourth Hokage.

The transformed clone then said "And it worked. Hello Sensei and Lord Third."

At first Hiruzen wasn't sure but according to Naruto's story he decided to jump on it.

"Is that you, Minato Namikaze?"

The transformed shadow clone nodded "Yes, I figured that I could use Naruto's clone as an avatar of sorts to speak through. I just had him make the clone and let me take control from within his mindscape. And before you ask, no I cannot use some of my jutsus. Naruto's chakra is a lot harder to control than mine was."

Naruto looked at his father...or avatar his father was using before he said "Wait, why didn't we do this before?"

Minato then said to him "Well, the Kyuubi wanted to meet with you as well, and unlike me, it can't do this since its still locked behind the deeper part of the seal. So unlike me, it can't do this."

"Oh well fuck you too!" the Kyuubi roared in Naruto and Minato's minds, much to Minato's amusement.

Jiraya paused for a moment before he walked over to him, and then asked him.

"Okay...what was one of the things I asked you for when I was writing my books?"

"You said 'Join the pervy side, we have many, many beautiful women to peep on'." Minato replied.

Jiraya nodded as he said "Yeah, he's real. Minato was the only person there when I said that."

Minato chuckled as he said "And you never will Sensei."

Naruto and Zabuza was trying hard not to laugh. Kakashi was nodding at the thought since he too had joined the pervy side, though not as much as Jiraya was. Meanwhile the rest had a hard time believing what they were hearing, considering the supposed teacher of the Fourth Hokage actually said that.

The Third Hokage smiled a little before all the ramifications of the situation hit his mind again. Naruto was now somehow part Kyuubi, Minato's soul ended up now also stuck in the seal, and he also had a missing nin from Kiri and his pupil wanting to work with/join Leaf so that they could eventually help with the whole situation over there.

The Third took a huff of his pipe before he spoke. His tone not the Grandfatherly figure the younger generation was used to...but as the head of Konoha.

"Well then...I guess I'll have to accept this. First off, Naruto's current condition is a SS class secret, and can only be revealed by me or the boy himself. Second, Minato since you're now stuck with him, I want you to teach the boy, and the other members of Team 7 if you have the time, as much as you can. Also, Anbu, I would like you to have the Namikaze estate made into Naruto's. We'll say that we decided to move him there in an attempt to improve his living conditions and use a building that hasn't been used in a while and won't be getting use otherwise. Until then, Team 7 is to remain on standby"

Everyone nodded in response to the first part, Minato alone to the second part, and one of his Anbus, a woman with purple hair, to the third part. The last part all of Team 7 responded with a "Yes sir!".

The Third Hokage continued "Lastly, as for you two, I have no problems in enlisting Haku after having her take an exam of sorts to prove herself. If successful, I will have her join as a 4th member to Team 7 since she is 'in the know'. As for you Zabuza, I would like to let our interrogation corps question you a bit. Though since you seem to be in Minato's favor, I will at least let them do so 'kindly'. Understood?"

Haku and Zabuza replied with a "Yes sir." Though Zabuza was a bit surprised it came out of his mouth. But then again, he was being asked, no ordered, this by the man once known as a God of Shinobi. He certainly had that commanding air around him when he needed it.

Hiruzen then took a look at Jiraya before he said "Lastly, I want you to make sure no information leaked about Naruto's appearance. If any of the Hyugas caught it…"

Jiraya nodded "Of course Sensei."

Hiruzen then looked at the group before he spoke "Now, you are dismissed to your duties!"

The group, the purple haired Anbu, and Jiraya then left the vicinity to do what they were asked.

After he was sure everyone other than Tenzo left, he quickly pulled open a part of his desk to reveal many...many bottles of sake. He kept them here specifically for times like this.

"Sir...are you sure you should be drinking right now?" the remaining Anbu said.

Hiruzen looked at him before he said "First, I am Hokage, I don't need you to question what I do. Second...I need it after that mind trip."

The Anbu then replied "...fair enough...just don't do what you did that one time with your paperwork."

The Hokage couldn't help but pout a little before taking a drink. The last time he got drunk in the office he ended up deciding to burn a whole pile of paperwork. And while he regretted it the next day, at the moment it felt great.

"I'm too old for this shit." he said as he took another drink.


WVH: Ah, the greatest enemy of all leaders...paperwork.

Minato: True enough...I'm just lucky I figured out the secret to not having to suffer it as much.

Hiruzen: That reminds me...WHAT IS THE SECRET!? I MUST KNOW!

Naruto: ...okay besides that, what's this weird inside joke everyone keeps talking about?

Haku: Oh, you'll get it soon.

Sakura: ...no...no no no. WVH, WHY YOU DO THIS TO ME!?

Sasuke: ...sigh, this is going to be a problem.

WVH: ...yeah, I think I broke her...

Kakashi: Mah mah, she'll get over it.

Naruto: Over what? Tell me!

WVH: Don't worry about it Naruto. In any case, to all our viewers out there, I hope you enjoyed the chapter and will R&R as well as come back for the next chapter!

A red haired boy from somewhere else: So this is why you weren't writing another chapter for my story?

WVH: ...siiiiiigggghhh. I really need to stop letting them somehow jump worlds to do this to me...