"Queen Beryl!" yelled Jadeite. "I found a new source of energy!"

The future and past Nephrites and Jadeites stood on a balcony overhead, watching Jadeite tell Beryl about his new source of energy.

"Excellent Jadeite!" Queen Beryl responded. "You've done well! You always make me proud!"

"Oops," said Future Nephrite. "Looks like we ended up in the wrong dimension. Let's try again."

"I don't know," said the Jadeites. "Maybe we should stay here..."

But they got shoved back in the Time Portal.

They appeared in the past again, in front of their rock huts. They watched from afar as a different Nephrite and Jadeite appeared from the past, and put notes under the past past Nephrite and Jadeite's doors.

All four of them ran up and tackled the note placers down. "Halt!" They yelled as they did so.

"WA!" cried the Jadeite who had gotten tackled. "Imposters!"

"Jadeite, you dolt," said Jadeite.

"You have a good point, Jadeite," agreed Jadeite.

"What are you doing here?" asked the tackled Nephrite.

"We're here to stop you from messing up the future!"

"Aww, great," complained the Nephrite who was about to put the note. "You sound just like Mayo."

"No, we're still here to mess up the future, but maybe it'll work to our favor this time!" the future Nephrite explained, hurt to have been compared to Mustard.

The Nephrite and Jadeite from the past, who had just been awoken by the others' bickering, emerged from their rock huts.

"WOAH! I'M TRIPPIN!" said Jadeite.

"Did Queen Beryl clone us? That's wacky, even for her!" Nephrite assumed.

"Don't be silly," future Nephrite told him. "We just went back in time, and recruited ourselves from the future that we messed up! And then we went back again, and recruited our original selfs who were about to make the new-"

"STAHP IT BURNS!" cried all four Jadeites.

"But why all the recruiting?" asked pastest Nephrite.

"So we can BEAT THE MOON KINGDOM, ONCE AND FOR ALL!" Nephrite said encouragingly.

"You mean we don't win?" past Jadeite asked.

Everyone just laughed.


All eight of them appeared on the Moon.

"Alright, men," said Kunzite, walking over with Zoisite to give them a pep talk. "Wait, wut?"

They both stared at the four Jadeites and four Nephrites.

"Oh boy did you go mess with the Time Gate?" Kunzite asked. "I have to remember in the future to not remind you of that thing."

"No..." they all said slowly.

"Well this is just great," said Zoisite. "One of them was bad enough."

Queen Beryl appeared. "Alright, we're about to- what the heck?"

"Hi Beryl," said all the Jadeites.

"Oh, hi Jadeites," said Beryl. She looked over at Kunzite. "Has there always been four of them?"

"Oh, good, you see it to?" He replied, relieved.

"Anyway, let's go!" yelled Beryl. She started to lead them into battle, but then she saw the Sailor Scouts. "Lolno, Ima just go get mah man!" she told them, taking off and leaving them to fend for themselves.

"Alright," said Kunzite. "Now as we practiced, I'm going to laugh evilly in case the Sailors ever see this in a flash back. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!"

"Kunzite maybe you should stop doing that and help us fight," Zoisite recommended.

"Ok one more minute. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!"

They all waited.

"Fine attack now," Kunzite said at last.

The ten of them charged. "Go Earth army go!" Kunzite turned and yelled behind him.

"Umm, well you didn't really train us to- GAAAHHA!" the Earth army yelled as they died one by one.

"Everything is going as planned," Kunzite said proudly. "Nephrite, or uh... Nephrites? Take your branch of the army to flank them from the-"

But the Nephrites were driven to win this time. They actually engaged in combat themselves. As did the Jadeites. Knowing that Queen Serenity being ignored was the sole reason they lost, they all charged her. She kept them at bay by prodding them off with the Moon stick.

"This is useless," said a Nephrite to a Jadeite.

"Yeah," said Jadeite. "Let's go help Beryl get Endymion!"

They ran over to see Beryl floating above Endymion and Princess Serenity.

"Hey Princess Serenity!" yelled Jadeite, interrupting the drama. "If you were to, say, be reborn in the future, what would your civilian name be?"

She just cried because Beryl was taking Endymion.

Prince Endymion floated towards Queen Beryl, since she was pulling him away with magic.

"Oh no, he's flying after our queen!" cried Jadeite.

Him and Nephrite leaped up and knocked him to the ground.

"WTF, STOP!" yelled Beryl.

"No my queen! We're saving you!" they yelled, kicking him while he was down.

"I don't need saving, you noob boys!" she screamed, furiously.

"Well clearly you do since you die!" Nephrite informed her.

"No way!" she said doubtfully. "I have everything planned out perfectly!"

"Yeah right," said Nephrite. "Did you take Queen Serenity into account?"

"Wait... who?" Beryl asked.

Nephrite face palmed.

"Don't worry, I'll just improvise!" Queen Beryl said confidently. "Kunzite, go take out Queen Serenity!"

"Huh?" said Kunzite, in the middle of making out with Zoisite while the Earth army died.

"See he's got it," Beryl reassured them.

"Ok good," they said, continuing to kick Endymion.

"STOP!" she cried.

"No way, he's a jerk!" Jadeite replied.

Queen Beryl flew down beside Jadeite and Nephrite.

"Lookin good, Beryl!" Jadeite commented.

She slayed him and Nephrite. "I told you to back off my man but you chumps didn't listen!"

As she stood above her two dead Shitennou, admiring her work, Endymion jumped up and got her with his sword.

"NUUUUU!" Beryl cried as she died.

"What just happened?" asked Metalia. "I can't see, I'm all the way up here! And I'm just a cloud!"

A giant hole in the time-space continuum appeared, and two Sailor Plutos leaped out of the Time Gate.

"What did you bozos do this time?!" they cried.

Nephrite went to call her a condiment, but his hand was gone. "What?" he asked.

"Woah, you're transparent!" a Jadeite exclaimed. "Is that a new power?"

They all started to disappear. "Are we fading from existence!?" that Nephrite that was dating Jadeite cried, trying to grab onto his boyfriend. But his hand flew right threw him, and then was gone.

"But why!?" a different Nephrite asked in shock. "Oh boy did one of us bozos get killed or something?"

"As long as the ones who originally went back in time are alright, we should be good," Jadeite inferred.

"So where are they?" Nephrite asked.

They all face palmed in unison.

"YOU FOOLS CREATED A TIME PARADOX!" Annouced Setsuna Meioh.

"Neat!" said Jadeite. "Oh, that's a bad thing?"

The world around them began crumbling.

"I must kill you all to set things straight!" a Pluto told them.

"That's not how this works!" said the other Pluto. "That's not how any of this works!"

"Like hell you'll kill us all!" a Nephrite screamed, shoving Pluto aside and jumping in the Time Gate.

"Hey! Bad!" screamed Pluto.

A Jadeite jumped in as well.

Kunzite and Zoisite looked up. "Should we go in there too?" Zoisite asked.

"Nah, I'm sure Beryl's got it under control," Kunzite said confidently.

Queen Serenity looked over at the Plutos. "WHY DID YOU GUYS LEAVE THE TIME GATE!?"

"We- but- uhhhhh..."

She tried to pull a last minute Silver Crystal energy release, but another Pluto appeared and killed her.

"WHY!?" screamed the other two Plutos.

"I fixed time!" said the new Pluto.

But she didn't, because they really didn't know shit.

"Now Crystal Tokyo is in danger!" cried a wild Setsuna, who had just appeared.

A bunch of Chibi-usas started falling from the sky. Everyone started drowning in them, and then there was a supernova and they all died.


"WAAAAAAAAAAA!" screamed the Jadeite and Nephrite who had jumped in the time portal and were now falling through time.

"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"


They landed with a thud in the middle of Beryl's thrown room.

"...Queen Beryl..." they asked nervously.

"Why hello boys," said Kunzite, spinning around in Beryl's throne. "Are you back from the mission?"

"Oh boy I think we goofed up again," said Jadeite. "Better hop back in the time gate!"

"Not so fast!" said Pluto, wearing a Shitennou uniform. "We still have three more rainbow crystals to collect!"

Three Beryls and a Zoisite appeared. "Make that two more rainbow crystals!" they said proudly, showing off the mauve crystal.

"That's not the right color..." said Nephrite.

"And why are there three Beryls?" asked Jadeite.

Zoisite just laughed. "There's 12 Beryls! What are you tools going on about?"

"Suck it Zoisite!" yelled Nephrite.

"Ok, bae," said Zoisite.

"AAAAAH!" cried Nephrite, making a run for it. But he ran into five more Beryls.

"Hey bae," they all said.

"ASDFJWAEG!" he cried, running the other direction.

"Jadeite, I found a new source of energy!" Kunzite announced.

Jadeite tried to run too, but he bumped smack into Galaxia. She was also in a Shitennou uniform.

"Kunzite!" she exclaimed. "I found the found the holder of Pegasus!"

"Oh for real!?" Kunzite said gleefully. "Bring him in!"

She dragged a tied up Dr. Tomoe into the room.

"No! You'll never take Hotaru!" he cried.

Hotaru came running in. She transformed into Sailor Moon. "You'll never get away wiht this! On behalf of the Negamoon, you will PAY!"

Jadeite and Nephrite looked at each other in horror. "What do we do?"

"You GET BACK TO WORK!" Kunzite demanded.

"Doing what?"

"Finding the Talismen of the Holy Grail, of course! Have you been sleeping eternally or something?"

"Put them back in an eternal sleep!" Sailor Mercury requested politely.

"No! Leave my best friends alone!" cried Zoisite.

They 1v1'd but then ended up dating.

"This really is a nightmare!" Nephrite wailed.

"I can't live like this!" cried Jadeite, pulling out his sword that he still had from the Moon Kingdom fight. "I SHALL KILL ME SELF!"

Sailor Pluto appeared, wearing the right outfit. "Don't do that, it will only mess things up worse, you dunce."

"Why is everything all wacky?!" Jadeite asked her.

"Because you didn't listen to me!"

"Well aren't you spiteful!" Nephrite accused her. "You did all this just to get back at me for dumping you and not listening to you!"

"NO," she said angrily. "YOU did all this, because YOU ARE DUMB!"

"Take that back!"

"NEVERRRRRR!"

Another Pluto had to come in to break up the fight.

"Now you guys are going to set things straight!" the latest Pluto told them.

"By jumping in the Time Gate and screwing things up until they get better again?" Nephrite asked.

"NOOOOOO!" cried Plutos.

But they knocked them over and jumped in the Time Gate.

One of the Plutos groaned, and leaped in after them.

FIN