"Queen Beryl!" yelled Jadeite. "I found a new source of energy!"

"Jadeite, it's me, Nephrite. Why are you calling me Queen Beryl?" Nephrite asked.

"Oh heya Nephrite! Why are you on Queen Beryl's throne?"

"Just trollin' around," Nephrite chortled.

"Huh," said Jadeite. "Have you seen Beryl around anywhere?"

"Oh yeah, I'll tell you how to get to her. Just walk three blocks to the right, and then turn left and walk two more blocks until you're standing on the red X."

"Gee, thanks!" said Jadeite, following the instructions. He got to the red X. Nephrite pulled a string and dropped an anvil on him.

"LOLOOLOOLOLO!" laughed Nephrite stealing Jadeite's wallet from his corpse. "Now I have enough money to take Molly to that planetarium show!"


"Heya Molly," Nephrite called, appearing in Molly's window.

"WAAAAAAAA!" cried Molly in shock. "You sicko, I was getting dressed!"

"Oh sorry, you should have called," said Nephrite.

"Why would I call when you were coming over? You should have called!"

"Nah," said Nephrite. "So hey, I killed this joker and I got the money to take us to that planetarium show you wanted to see!"

"But you're the one who wanted to see it..."

"So that's a yes?"

"Well I would but I'm going out with Melvin tonight."

"Aww yuck, that nerd?" Nephrite asked angrily. "Naww, forget about him!"

"D'aww that would be rude," replied Molly.

"Come ooooonnnnnn," whined Nephrite.

"D'aww fine, I'll figure out a way to come without hurting Melvin's feelings."

"Excellent!" laughed Nephrite evilly.


Nephrite pulled up in front of Molly's apartment building and beeped his horn.

Melvin came out. "Hidy ho, Nefruit!"

"Why are you here?"

"Molly said I could tag along!"

"She said WHAT?!" barked Nephrite.

"Shot gun!" Melvin called, getting in the front.

Nephrite was about to finish him off but Molly came out.

"Hiya, I guess I'll just sit in the back."

She got in the car.

Nephrite drove to the show and they went to get seats. The seats had already been mostly filled up, since they had been running late due to Melvin's having to go to the bathroom three times.

Nephrite finally found three open seats.

"After you," he said to Molly, who sat down on the edge seat.

Nephrite went to sit down next to her, but Melvin slid in and stole the middle seat.

"MOVE!" screamed Nephrite.

"Don't be pushy," chided Melvin.

"Neeephrite," whined Molly. "Don't start drama!"

Nephrite grumbled incoherently and sat down next to Melvin.

He leaned away from Melvin onto the opposite arm rest.

A hand was placed on top of his.

Nephrite turned around slowly, to be face to face with Rei's grandpa.

"Hey young man!" said Rei's Gramps. "You single?"

"Actually I'm on a date," Nephrite explained angrily, pulling his hand away from Gramps.

"Oh, well your date has cute glasses!" said Grandpa.

Melvin turned around to Grandpa and winked.

"ARRRRGH!" yelled Nephrite.

"Quiet down!" insisted Molly. "The show's about to start!"

The lights dimmed and the presenter came on stage. It was a teacher from a nearby high school.

"Hello ladies and gents. Today we have a special guest who is here to speak with us about stars."

"OH BOY!" applauded Nephrite. "YEAAAAH!" he shouted pumping his fist.

"Didn't you know what the show was gonna be about?" asked Melvin.

"Can it four-eyes, of course I did! I just get excited when I hear talk about stars!"

The host continued. "Our special guest is someone you've all heard of, the famous Taiki Kou!"

"Who?" everyone asked.

"He's one of the Three Lights?"

"OHHHH!" said everyone. They all started cheering.

Enter Taiki Kou.

"Hello everyone, I am Taiki Kou! Your favorite of the Three Lights!"

"Who the hell is this chump?" demanded Nephrite.

"You don't know the Three Lights?" asked Molly.

"No, I'm not supposed to be around this season."

"Why not?" asked Melvin obliviously.

"Shut it geek boy!"

"Now we're going to take some questions from the audience," said Taiki. "Who wants to talk about stars?"

"ME! ME! ME! ME!" yelled Nephrite, waving and jumping up and down.

"How about you?" they asked, pointing in the opposite direction of Nephrite.

Nephrite let out a loud growl and sunk back in his seat.

"Hello, how many stars do you think are out there?" the chosen audience member asked.

"ARE YOU SERIOUS!?" screamed Nephrite.

"Well," said Taiki, "We don't have an exact number, but we're sure there are a lot of them."

Everyone applauded.

"Next question!"

Nephrite stood up again and climbed on top of Melvin to get seen.

"MEEEEEEEE!"

"How about you?" they said, looking right in his direction.

"ME?!" he asked.

"No, the kid with glasses," Taiki said.

Nephrite growled even louder.

"Oh boy!" said Melvin. "My question is, can I go to the restroom?"

"I don't know," said Taiki. "Can you?"

The audience all laughed.

"HUH?!" asked Melvin in shock.

"This isn't funny! I ate a lot of shrimp today!" insisted Melvin. "It's starting to kick in!"

Nephrite was about to slaughter Melvin, when Taiki said, "Alright, last question! I'll give it to the first person who raises their hand!"

Nephrite instantly raised his hand. A good ten seconds later, a blue haired girl raised her hand.

"You, the cute one with blue hair!" winked Taiki.

"WHAAT?!" screamed Nephrite. "THIS IS AN OUTRAGE! AN OUUUTRAGE!?"

Ami asked her question. "Do you think people can be reborn as stars?"

"I think so," said the professor from the high school.

"No way!" said Taiki. The music track "Split Sailors" started playing in the background. "People can NOT be reborn as stars!"

"How do you know?" asked the professor.

"Because I'm a Sailor Starlight!"

Everyone gasped.

"Did I say Starlight? I meant Three Light! LOL!" Taiki laughed.

"Ohhhh, haha!" laughed the audience in unison.

"Now wait just a darn second!" yelled Nephrite, leaping onto the stage and stealing the microphone.

"I'll have you know, everything is ruled by the stars! And the stars say, Nay! People can be reborn as stars!"

"Science proves-" began Taiki.

Nephrite socked him in the face. "Science proves you suck! Stars, grant me the power to put this bozo in his place!"

"You can't communicate with stars, fool," Taiki scoffed. "And even if you could, it'd be impossible for them to materialize anything that would do me harm."

Nephrite shot an energy blast from the stars straight at Taiki.

"WOAH NELLY!" cried Taiki in shock. He leaped out of the way. The blast hit the crowd and 1/4 of the audience died.

"That... was just a cheap parlor trick!" declared Taiki. "Just an illusion I tell you!"

"Stars, summon down Leo the Lion and butcher this chump!" called Nephrite.

"Nephroyte, stop!" called Molly.

"STAY OUT OF THIS!" yelled Nephrite.

"You're dumb," said Taiki. "Leo the Lion is just a constellation. Constellations are just patterns made by humans to help organize the stars; they don't really exist."

Leo the Lion appeared and started chowing down on Taiki.

"HACKS!" cried Taiki.

Meanwhile, Seiya and Yaten were watching it all go down on a small TV in their studio.

"That Taiki is real joker," laughed Yaten.

"I don't think he's very funny," said Seiya.

The soundtrack, "Split Sailors" from the Sailor Moon S OST started playing in the background. (Google it, it's a good one)

Seiya jumped up, knocking over his chair. Yaten jumped up, knocking over the sofa. They put em' up.

Taiki continued to get mauled on TV.

It was an outrage considering it was live television. The planetarium threw Nephrite, Molly and Melvin out. They also threw Gramps out because they thought he was associated with them.

"Nice going," said Melvin angrily.

"That was awesome!" said Molly. "You really taught that queerboy a lesson on astrology!"

"Astrology isn't a science," said Melvin. "It's just made up hokus pokus to try and convince people that there's something outside of the Solar System!"

Nephrite grabbed Melvin's collar and picked him up.

"TAKE THAT BACK!"

"NEVER!"

Nephrite tossed Melvin straight up into space.

"MELVIN NOOOO!" cried Molly.

"Alright Molly wanna go get a milkshake?" asked Nephrite.

"Aww yea, okey dokey!" Molly said happily. They took off.

Melvin drifted through space and eventually got pulled in by a nearby black hole. He was never seen again.

FIN