Barry's POV

I blinked when a blaring beside me started. I shook my mind of its clutter, but it just organized it into a different pattern. I reached over to the nightstand beside me and pressed my finger against the digital clock that spoke with sirens. I slipped out under the covers and walked to the kitchen. I started the process of making every adult's favorite drink: coffee. I am going to need it. I didn't get a wink of sleep last night. I came home late and tired to meet an angry Iris. She just wants to spend the time she has left with her husband. I can't blame her. However, there are other people in my life who deserve to cherish that same time before I...go.

Plus, if I only stay with her, then how would I have found out about Charlie? Another thing that deprived me of sleep was the fact that I have a son. Well, kind of. It is Savitar who made Caitlin pregnant; but then again, Savitar is a future version of me, so Charlie is genetically my child. Why did Caitlin never tell me? Not that I would deserve to know, but so she wouldn't be alone in this. Today is definitely going to be a weird day at S.T.A.R. Labs.

"Babe? Are you okay?" A feminine voice pulled me out of my thoughts. I shook my head for the millionth time to realize I was standing over the sink with a coffee pot but doing nothing.

I put on a soft smile. "Yeah. I'm just a little tired because of last night, you know?"

She grabbed the pot from my hands and continued my task. "The party?" She asked as she filled the pot with water.

"Yeah," I nodded as I backed away from her workspace.

I promised Frost that I wouldn't tell anybody about her secret; that includes my wife. Luckily my fake smile was convincing when I told her I was going to head out to Team Flash's base of operations. I didn't wait for the coffee to be done; I mean, I'm pretty sure Caitlin's would be better. No offense to Iris, but she isn't the best cook. My personal physician always made me a special speedster drink, but I just wanted an extra caffeine boost.

I raced to the cortex not surprised to see a brunette sitting at the big, curved desk looking at something on one of the monitors. She wasn't surprised, either, when the gust of wind from my entrance made her hair fly in her face. For a second she was annoyed, but it faded with a concentrating face. She was clearly delved into whatever she was doing; she was biting her lip, which always set something in me a flutter.

I leisurely walked around the cortex since there was nothing else to do; but of course, I was looking to see if someone else was here. By the looks of it, no. I was glad because I could talk to Caitlin about the baby. I leaned on the desk she was working at. I peered down at her admiring how fast her eyes read whatever it was they were registering.

"Hey," I drew out the word longer than it should have. I cursed myself for not playing it cool.

"Hey?" The doctor replied questioningly without her focus wavering from her task.

I had no idea how to get on the subject, so instead, I stupidly filled the silence with "uhs" and "umms."

Then her attention was caught. She looked up with a concerned expression. "You okay?"

Again, I shook my head to organize my thoughts. I decided to get straight to the point and not beat around the bush. "How's Charlie?"

"Who?" She asked.

I remembered it was Frost who showed me the child, so Caitlin must be oblivious to my knowledge. "Don't worry, I know."

"Know what?" She looked genuinely confused. How is she so composed?

"I know about the kid. Frost told me," I further explained.

Her expression deepened. "Frost told you about what kid? Honestly, Barry, I have no idea what you're talking about."

I was confused for a moment while I pondered the information. She actually doesn't know? I smirked when I came to a conclusion: Frost never told Caitlin about Charlie! Now, that takes skill to hide something from somebody who shares the same body. However, I wanted to further test my theory.

"Where do you live?" I quizzed.

She shrugged. "I don't actually know. Frost is the one who actively goes to bed and wakes up. I am usually conscious when I am sitting at the desk here."

"How about when I was in the Speedforce?"

She slowly answered as she continued to grow confused at the same rate. "Same thing."

Now, there was no way Caitlin would've not known she was pregnant; so here comes the ultimate decider. "Were you pregnant while you were gone?"

Despite her perplexed state of mind, she wore a calm position, until the sentence I just spoke. Her eyes flew wide open in panic; the brunette stared me down trying to probe information about how I knew the secret. By her countenance, I could tell she was going to lie.

As she opened her mouth to speak, I reminded her of our bond. "Don't lie. I know when you are...or about to."

She began to slump in defeat before she gave it all up. "Yes," was her small confession.

I noticed her glistening eyes before I began to speak. Her manner suggested she was in a reverie; a painful reverie. I concluded not to interrupt the memory which she seemed she needed. I wandered my eyes to the wall behind her.

"How did you find out?" Her question was barely audible because of the grief weighing down the words already voiced in a whisper.

"Frost." I simply said. I didn't want to give up whatever Frost was keeping from her counterpart.

Quickly, Caitlin lifted her walls as she put her focus on cleaning up her workspace. "I don't know why she did. She shouldn't have," the doctor tried to reason for her body-share-er's actions while she organized her papers. Caitlin walked over to her usual workspace, the med bay, as she continued. "I mean, it doesn't matter. We gave it up for adoption because we knew we couldn't handle the responsibility while still trying to figure out our dynamic."

"Do you know who the family that took the baby is?"

By now, the bio-engineer was cleaning beakers to keep herself busy. By the looks of it, the action wasn't working since she was getting harsher and rougher with each wipe. "No," she snapped.

I decided to approach but walked carefully and quietly. When my personal physician was like this, she was unpredictable. For some reason, though, I felt tears were going to be shed. When I was right behind her, close enough to smell her rosy shampoo, I asked the query I already knew the answer to. "The father?"

She drew in a breath as mine hit the skin of her neck. "Savitar," she whimpered.

As the person was named, she put her beaker and rag down. I could tell she was giving in to the letting go. Her shoulders lifted and head lowered as she relaxed. After a couple of silent moments, I saw a drop plop onto the table she leaned over. I instantly spun her around and tightly wrapped my arms around her. Her sobs began to become quietly audible. I felt soft hands creep up to and around my neck while she fully surrendered her defenses.

"Hey, hey," I cooed while I rocked her on her feet. "It's okay, it's okay," I repeated the words and motion until Caitlin's crying lessened. Once it dwindled to a sniffle, I stepped back with my arms grasping her shoulders to look at her. "Are you alright?" I asked with a bowed head to look up through my eyelashes.

She weakly nodded. "You're not mad?" Was her shaky follow-up question.

"No. No, no, no, no. No," I assured her promptly. "I can never be mad at you. Well, at least for too long."

This caused a chuckle to escape and a grin to emerge. The fact that I was easing her sadness caused me to smile in response. I planted a kiss on her forehead and pulled her head into my chest. I missed our hugs and unnoticed touches throughout the day; in all honesty, I missed being closer to her, emotionally and physically. I hardly talk to her anymore unless there is a group discussion in the cortex about a metahuman. How did I let us drift this far apart? We're barely friends anymore!

"What's going on?" Cisco's question caused us to step away from each other.

We both replied quickly in unison, "nothing."

Cisco looked at us peculiarly. He was curious as to why we were hugging; then again, why wouldn't he? It isn't like I'm around much anymore.

"I just came by and saw Caitlin. I decided to catch up, ya' know. It isn't like I've seen her that much lately." I further explained. It wasn't a total lie; just a half-truth.

This seemed to satisfy Cisco's curiosity. "So you told her about your death?"

"What?" The brunette snapped.

My face grew pink with guilt. I couldn't look at her, so I stole a glance at Cisco. His face was the same shade of awkwardness.

"I'll just let you catch up a little bit longer," the engineer slowly backed out of the room.

Once his form disappeared, Caitlin elaborated on her interrogation. "What does he mean your death?"

I looked at my feet in shame while I felt the doctor burn my skin with her stare. "Uh...you might want to sit down." She did as instructed. Her stern and curious gaze never wavered from my face. I took a deep breath and mustered the courage to look her in the eye. "I recently tried going into the future to see what will happen during this crisis, but there was a wall of anti-matter that prevented me from going there. It injured my leg and my speed healing wasn't...well...healing it-"

"You got hurt and didn't think to tell me? Your doctor?" Caitlin angrily lectured.

Barry justified his actions. "You didn't know anything about antimatter. Gideon told me to go to Earth 3 and see Jay Garrick." Barry paused waiting for his doctor's reaction. She nodded understandingly and he decided to resume his explanation. "Once I got to Earth 3, Jay concocted a contraption that sent my mind into the future…" his voice trailed as he remembered the experience.

"Your mind should be able to pass since there isn't anything physically going pass the barrier." Caitlin's scientific mind broke his thoughts.

"Yeah," he nodded weakly. "The thing caused me to see billions of possible futures. The only one which everyone didn't...you didn't...die...was the one that I sacrificed myself." The confession was weak because the pain the idea brought was heart-wrenching.

Instead of letting even just one other tear fall, the doctor sat composed with a solemn countenance. After a time of thought, Caitlin stated, "you're gonna die." It was weak and shaky compared to her composure. So much has happened in her life; it isn't fair that most loving, compassionate, beautiful doctor has gone through so much pain. Now, her best friend is going to die. "I'm gonna go and let Frost take over."

Before Barry could stop her, brown turned to white, skin became paler, and lips turned blue. "Hey Frost," the Flash said partly deflated.

Teasingly, the biochemist's counterpart pouted. "Oh! What's wrong Flashy?"

The answer wasn't what she was expecting. "You need to tell Cait about Charlie."

"That'll rock her world," she opposed. "She already has enough going on. And now she has your death to deal with!"

"Yes, it'll rock her world, but it would give her some hope! Something to live for." Barry reasoned. "I know how she gets at the prospect of her friends dying. She'll shut out the world or hide in you. Knowing about her son would give her something to live for and make up for my absence."

"No," she stated firmly before standing up and storming out of the medbay.

After frustrated sigh, Barry stood up and went after her. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see Cisco's confused expression at his station in the Cortex. Exiting the base of operations, Barry grabbed Frost's arm and pinned her to the wall. He didn't realize how close his face was to hers, but he didn't care right now; he was focused on Caitlin's wellbeing. He knew that her knowing about Charlie would help her recover.

"Please," he asked, pouring all the emotion and care he could muster into the word.

A moment of thought and silence passed before Frost consented. "Okay." A smile spread across the speedster's face. "But, you have to tell her with me."

Barry let go of Frost saying, "yeah, yeah. No problem."

Amidst his happiness, he wrapped the woman in front of him in a tight hug. He felt her slowly reciprocate which made him think; he hasn't really shown much affection towards her.

"Can we do it today?" Barry asked, holding onto her a little bit longer to somewhat make up for lack of friendship.

"Sure," she replied.

A/N Sorry for taking a long time. But if you know me, then you know it takes me a while to update stuff. I am trying though! I just have other priorities as an 8th grader! Plus I'm paying extra attention to my YouTube channel...so...anyways! Hopefully, I update this soon! Then again, I write 7-page chapters!