"Queen Beryl!" yelled Jadeite. "I found a new source of energy!"

That's when a Youma dashed in and threw a punch at Jadeite.

"Woah!" said Jadeite putting the Youma down.

But another two ran in and charged Jadeite.

Jadeite had to put them down as well.

"What's going on?!" demanded Jed.

Another Youma ran in but Beryl took care of this one.

"How far are they lined up just to come in and die?" asked Jadeite.

"I don't know," said Beryl. "Many of the Youmas are uncivilized, and they have been especially rowdy these past few days."

"What do we do?" asked Jadeite.

"This can't keep going on," said Beryl. "I need you to teach the Youmas organization and teamwork!"

"Why me?!" cried Jadeite.

"By you, I mean all of you. Round up the others, this is an important mission!" shouted Beryl.

"Eh," said Jed. "At least I'm not alone on this one."


Jadeite rallied the boys and they all cautiously headed down into the Youma slums.

"Kunzite, I'm scared," said Zoisite. "I've never gone to this side of the Negaverse before."

"Don't worry," said Kunzite. "Just stay behind me, I can take any Youma!"

That's when Zoisite turned around to see the DD Girls pinning each of Kunzite's limbs down, and the fifth throwing punches to his exposed torso.

Zoisite had to throw himself at the DD Girl, tackling her to the floor.

Kunzite gained his footing again and eliminated the DD Girls.

"They caught me by surprise!" exclaimed Kunzite. "Let's keep going."

They headed further into the slums until they found an open field where the Youmas were pushing rocks around in an attempt to build something. But the structure they built fell apart and they all howled.

"Sheeeeeeeeesh!" said Jadeite. "We need to teach the Youmas organization and teamwork!"

That's when Nephrite came running in.

"Look what I made! It's a football, I chiseled it!" he said.

"No, it's a stone," said Zoisite. "You didn't make it," he taunted.

"Go to hell," said Nephrite. "I clearly chiseled it myself. With this, we can teach the Youmas organization and teamwork!"

They rallied up the Youmas and put them all on one team.

"Alright," said Jed. "You guys will face us in football. You will have to work together in order to beat the four of us!"

"I'm not playing football," said Zoisite. "That's a boys' game."

"Yes," said Kunzite. "Just come on and play, we have to teach the Youmas organization and teamwork!"

"I know that," said Zoisite. "But I'm not roughhousing with some wild mongrels!"

Nephrite threw the ball at Zoisite, and he caught it defensively.

"I said I'm not playing!"

"Tackle Zoisite!" shouted Nephrite.

All the Youmas threw themselves on Zoisite, and he was defeated.

"We're off to a good start!" said Jadeite. "You're getting the hang of this, Youmas!"

Jadeite threw a long pass, and Nephrite ran to catch it.

He dodged many Youmas throwing themselves, and caught the ball.

"Keep running!" shouted Jadeite.

"No!" said Kunzite. "Nephrite, you're out of bounds! Come back!"

Nephrite kept running with the football.

He ran and ran and ran until he was far out of sight.

"Did I win?" he wondered.

That's when he bumped into a particularly strong Youma.

"Hey!" shouted the Youma. "Watch where you're goin'!"

"No?" said Nephrite. "I am one of the great four!"

"The great four what?" asked the Youma.

"Beryl's guys! You're just some lowly Youma!"

That's when the Youma had enough and turned Nephrite into an egg.

"That'll teach that wise guy," said the Youma, walking away.

Jadeite ran up a few minutes later.

"Nephrite?" he called.

He looked down to see some random egg laying there.

"That's odd," said Jadeite. "Maybe I should make it into an omelet."

Kunzite and Zoisite and a couple Youmas soon caught up to Jadeite.

"Where's Nephrite?" Kunzite asked. "If he thinks he's going to get out of teaching the Youmas organization and teamwork, then he has another thing coming!"

Suddenly, 5 very powerful Youmas with the strength of easily Ninjana flew in from the depths of the Negaverse and drop-kicked Kunzite, knocking him out of commission.

"Hey!" said Zoisite. "Me and Jadeite will teach you what happens when Youmas mess with the Elite Four!"

Jadeite waited.

"Go show 'em, Jadeite!" commanded Zoisite.

"Aren't you going to help?" asked Jadeite.

"I'm more of a support fighter," explained Zoisite. "I'll throw de-buffs occasionally and get in a sneak attack if things line up."

"Fine," said Jadeite.

He threw himself at the Youmas and shot lightning out of his palms.

He ended one of the Youmas, but the other four took its place.

Jadeite was quickly over-powered while Zoisite made no effort to help.

They turned to Zoisite after restraining Jadeite.

Zoisite tried to run on foot but they easily caught up and overwhelmed him.


Jadeite, Zoisite, and Kunzite came to in some sort of cage.

"Hey!" shouted Jadeite. "What's going on? We'll tell Beryl about this!"

Kunzite pulled on the bars. "No use," he said. "We're in some kind of anti-negative energy bubble."

"Heh heh," said Jadeite. "That's a double negative!"

"I'll give you a double slug!" warned Kunzite.

Jadeite went quiet.

One of the powerful Youmas approached the cage.

"Heh heh," she laughed.

"You better watch it," said Zoisite. "I'll tell Beryl!"

"No," said the Youma. "You will have to face us in a game of football!"

"What the hell?" demanded Kunzite.

"Is this some kind of joke?" asked Zoisite.

"What's in it for us?" demanded Jadeite.

The Youma laughed. "This egg here."

"You can keep it," said Zoisite. "We don't need some dumb egg."

"Well you may not know this, but this 'dumb egg' is your good pal Nephrite!"

"You can keep it," repeated Zoisite. "We don't need some dumb Nephrite."

"Hey now," said Jadeite. "Nephrite is one of the Great Four!"

"That title seems to have lost its meaning these days, especially when we got over-powered by Youmas," noted Kunzite.

"Still!" insisted Jadeite. "We can't just let the Youmas have him! Because then they win!"

"Fine, we'll play your game," agreed Kunzite angrily.

"I thought you would," smirked the Youma. She left.

"Hey," said Jadeite. "How come there are no guy Youmas?"

"Beats me," said Zoisite. "Let's get back on topic. We need a strategy."

"Alright," said Kunzite. "Let's think of one."


Zoisite paced back and forth in the cell.

"First Nephrite gets turned into an egg, then a bunch of Youmas imprison us in a cage, and make us play football with one of the Shitennou as the ball! Youmas used to be so much more civilized! What is this kingdom coming to?!"

Jadeite was starting to panic. "I'm scared Kunzite! If we drop Nephrite, he'll be scrambled!"

Kunzite shrugged. "You win some you lose some, I guess. Hey, let go of me, Jadeite!"

Kunzite shoved Jadeite off him.

"Sorry," said Jadeite. "I'm just spooked."

A Youma opened their cell door.

"You have five minutes until the game starts," said the Youma. "Use it wisely."

"Alright," said Jadeite. "We need a plan."

"Wait," said Zoisite. "Is it alright to be discussing our plans in front of that guy?"

"What guy?" asked Kunzite turning around.

"Ho ho ho," said Kenji. "Don't mind me!"

Kunzite shot Kenji Tsukino a look and then turned back to the others.

"We don't have a choice," said Kunzite. "We must beat them at football fair and square!"


"Alright teams, here are the rules!" said Grandpa.

The Shitennou lined up on one side, and the four powerful Youmas lined up on the other.

"This is tackle football, with out of bounds marked by these lines!"

"There are no lines," whispered Jadeite.

"Shh," said Zoisite. "Don't tell that geezer. He doesn't even know where he is."

"Further," said Grandpa. "The winning team all has to give me smooches!"

"Shut up!" yelled a Youma with a strong Boston accent. "We'll never get started!"

"She has a strong Boston accent," noted Kunzite.

Grandpa blew his whistle, and the game began.

Jadeite threw Zoisite the ball, but Zoisite ducked for cover.

The ball hit the ground.

"Ah! Nephrite!" yelled Jadeite, but the egg seemed to be intact. "Phew!"

"Zoisite, what are you doing out there?" said Kunzite.

"I'm sorry," said Zoisite. "I'm not used to doing anything physical."

Kunzite sighed. "Do you even know how to play?"

"Yes," lied Zoisite.

This time the Youma team started with the ball.

A Youma passed it to another Youma, but Kunzite threw himself at the Youma.

The ball fell to the ground again, and Jadeite flinched.


It was several plays in, and Kunzite finally got his paws on the ball.

He zipped towards the end zone.

That's when a Youma threw itself on him, and he fell to the ground.

Grandpa blew the whistle.

"Hey!" yelled Kunzite. "What is this, Australian rules?!"

"I just tackled you regularly," said the Youma. "That's how you play football."

"Oh," said Kunzite. He was still mad.

The Youmas did another play, but suddenly the ball landed in Jadeite's arms by pure luck.

"Do a play!" shouted Kunzite, and Jadeite stood there with his knees shaking.

"Jadeite's gonna try a pass play!" said Jadeite out loud.

"What?!" shouted Kunzite.

Jadeite started sprinting with the ball, and sprinted straight out the door.

Kunzite and Zoisite dashed after him.

"Good thinking!" said Zoisite. "Keep running!"

That's when Jadeite took a right and looped back into the stadium from the other door.

"No!" said Zoisite. "Why would you return?!"

Jadeite kept up his trot and made it to the end zone a second time, where he tapped the ball to the ground.

"TOUCHDOWN!" he yelled.

He began to do a shuffle-like dance.

Kunzite and Zoisite caught up and also started dancing.

"We win!" cheered Zoisite.

"No," said a Youma. "That was only one touchdown! Hey, stop dancing!"

But they didn't stop.

That's when a Youma ran up and threw a punch, tossing the egg out of Jed's hands.

"NOOO!" yelled Jadeite.

But Kunzite dove and caught the ball.

However, three more Youmas landed on top of him, kicking him to the curb.

"I'll leave footprints!" yelled one of the Youmas. "On your faces!"

"No!" cried the Shitennou.

They were all pinned down and out of luck.

That's when Queen Beryl walked in.

"Did someone call my name?" she asked. "What's going on in here?"

"Help!" cried Jadeite. "These Youma savages forced us to play football! With Nephrite as the ball!"

Queen Beryl was confused.

The Youmas took this opportunity to pile on Queen Beryl.

Youmas leapt out of the crowd and threw themselves at her in a downright revolt.

"ENOUGH!" yelled Beryl, but she was getting slugged from all angles.

Jadeite leapt in to help her out, but the more Youmas he threw off her, the more piled on.

More Youmas came in and hauled Jadeite away, and he was never seen again.

"This is the end, Kunzite!" said Zoisite sadly.

That's when Kunzite expelled all his power, ending every Youma in the Negaverse.

"There we go," he said. "I just needed to build up some energy."

"Wow," said Zoisite. "That was crazy."

"Yes, I know," said Kunzite. "I rivaled the Moon Wand right when the Moon Princess was awakened! I am no pushover!"

Zoisite shivered, remembering the Moon Wand.

"Where's Jadeite?" asked Beryl. "He was the only one of you to actually try to help me!"

Kunzite focused for a minute. "He is no longer with us," he said.

"What about Nephrite?" asked Beryl.

"He's this egg," said Kunzite, picking him up and handing him to Beryl.

"This isn't an egg. It's a football," said Beryl.

"Uh oh," said Kunzite. "Then where's Nephrite?"


Nephrite hatched in the pterodactyl nest.

He got ready to brawl with the pterodactyls, but the pterodactyl mother accepted him as one of her own and he decided to hang for a while.

FIN