"Queen Beryl!" yelled Jadeite. "I found a new source of energy!"

"Sorry, Jadeite," said Beryl. "Look what time it is."

"Oh, it's 10 AM. That's Nephrite's hour."

"Yes," said Beryl.

Nephrite strolled in fashionably late at 10:01 AM. "Yo," he said. "Isn't Jadeite's hour over by now?"

"I goofed the time," admitted Jadeite. "Can I stay and observe?"

"No," said Beryl. "You'll just try to steal his ideas."

"How come Zoisite gets to observe then?" demanded Jadeite. "And he's always disruptive!"

"Hey," said Zoisite who was standing behind Nephrite. He left it at that.

"Nephrite is a loser," he said under his breath.

Kunzite teleported in in a burst of energy. "Queen Beryl, I'm going out to get your dry-cleaning. Can I have your ticket number?"

"It's okay," said Beryl. "Endymion already got it for me."

"No!" said Kunzite. "He's always one-upping me!"

"Guys, guys!" said Beryl. "Is this some kind of jamboree?! This is supposed to be Nephrite's hour! You're welcome to stand in that mob of Youmas and watch, but-"

"What mob of Youmas?" asked Zoisite. "This is just the wallpaper you put it a couple weeks ago. It's not even always there, very odd."

"Oh yeah," recalled Beryl. "Anyway, Nephrite, what is your plan?"

"Well, as you would expect, I will be targeting someone at the peak of their energy," Nephrite began.

"Good idea!" commented Jadeite. "I should try that some time!"

"Beryl," said Nephrite. "Can you get them out of here?"

"My hands are tied," said Beryl.

"Heh heh," said Zoisite. "Stupid plan, Nephrite."

"ANYWAY," said Nephrite loudly. "This week's target will be some girl about to go to prom."

"Prom!" gasped Jadeite loudly. "I remember when I went to prom! It was in the Silver Millennium!"

"Oh, how could I forget such a magical night!" commented Beryl. "Probably the last event I went to with my boyfriend Endymion."

"I thought Endymion said you guys were just going as friends?" recalled Jadeite.

"Shut it, Jadeite!" said Beryl. "You just sat in the bathroom all prom on your phone!"

"LIES!" cried Jadeite defensively. "They didn't even have phones back then!"

"I remember my Negaprom," reminisced Zoisite. "That was before I came out of the closet!"

"There was a time like that?" asked Nephrite, trying to think back. "Oh yeah, that was a looong time ago. Before we even teamed up with Beryl!"

"Wait," said Kunzite. "If we weren't teamed with Beryl, who did we work for again?"

"I think Endymion," said Jadeite.

"What?! NO!" cried Kunzite. "No one tell this to Endymion. His ego is already huge enough."

"Heh," said Beryl. "Endymion, what a guy. I'm glad he's on the evil side finally!"

"We'll see how long it lasts," sneered Kunzite.

Beryl was mad so Kunzite quickly changed the subject.

"I remember prom too, it's all coming back to me," said Kunzite. "Remember who Nephrite's date was?"

"No," said Nephrite.

"Heh," said Kunzite. "That green-haired girl."

"Oh, Mayo!" remembered Nephrite. "What a gal. She still has the hots for me, I'm sure of it!"

Suddenly they all faded into a flashback…


The limo Prince Endymion rented pulled up to the ball on the moon.

"Oh boy, we're here!" said Jadeite giddily. "I can't wait to meet up with my date!"

"Cut the act," said Nephrite. "I know you don't have a date and you're just going to sit in the bathroom all night."

"What?!" cried Jadeite. "Where would you get that idea?!"

"Hmm, I don't know about this Moon Kingdom," said Kunzite. "This could be a trap. I hate moon children."

"Hey now," said Endymion. "The Moon Kingdom is a good place, and I hope we form an alliance with them one day!"

"Sure, sure!" agreed Endymion's date Beryl. "We will totally do that! Endymion, you're so bright!"

"Hey Endymion," said Zoisite. "Why is your date some measly fortune-teller who works below minimum wage at some carnival or something? You're supposed to be a prince!"

"Watch it," said Beryl. "You have a lot to learn, guy whose name I don't know yet!"

"No, you watch it!" said Zoisite. "I'm one of the prince's elite four! You will always be below me in rank!"

"Sometimes things have a way of working out," said Beryl. "And I will remember your disrespect thousands of years from now."

"Calm down, my queen," said Jadeite.


"Jadeite!" said Beryl. "I'm wasn't a queen yet!"

"Oh right," said Jadeite. "I don't remember what I said specifically back then."

"Back to the story," said Nephrite.

"Right," agreed Jadeite. "And then I said…"


"I just don't see why everyone thinks I will spend the whole prom in the bathroom! That will never happen!"

"Sure," said Kunzite.

Finally the limo doors opened and the six of them stepped out.

They were soon greeted by the Moon Queen herself, Queen Serenity.

She was flanked by two friendly kittens.

"Hello, Earthlings," said Queen Serenity.

"Your hair looks stupid," said Zoisite.

"Hey now," said Endymion. "Please ignore him."

"Yes," said Queen Serenity. "I hope you all enjoy your stay in our kingdom."

"Of course," bowed Endymion politely.

The Shitennou didn't move and instead gave nasty looks to Queen Serenity.

"I hate this place," said Kunzite.

"Me too," said Beryl. "But we have to stick with our prince!"

"Come this way," lead Serenity.

"Hey!" barked Serenity's white cat as the pack walked towards the ballroom.

"Did that cat talk?" asked Nephrite.

"Ye," said Artemis. "You alien cretins better be on your best behavior," he warned. "The ballroom is packed with guards that will escort you out at any time."

"Hmm," said Beryl. "Your guards are puny, along with your whole army. You should probably work on your defenses instead of having these parties all the time."

"Go to HELL!" screamed Artemis.

Queen Serenity picked up Artemis.

"Calm down now, my boy," she told him.

Then she apologized to the guests. "He can get a little skittish sometimes. He's still a young lad."

"Don't worry about it," said Endymion. "Say, where's your daughter?"

Queen Serenity and Beryl narrowed their eyes.

"Endymion," said Beryl. "You're supposed to only look at me!"

"Didn't you say we were going as just friends?" recalled Endymion.

"No you said that," said Beryl. "I said we should go as dates."

"Hmm," said Endymion thoughtfully.

Finally they entered the main room.

"Gotta blast," said Serenity.

"Wait," said Jadeite. "Can you point me to the bathroom?"

"Here it goes," said Zoisite.

"No," said Jadeite. "I just want to know in case anything comes up later! I'm going to the food table first, actually!"

"Ah," said Serenity. "Well the bathroom's right down the hall."

"Good," said Jadeite. "I won't be there so don't look for me there."

Jadeite took off down the hall.

"The food table's the other way!" called Serenity, but he kept going.

"Well that was a doozy," said Nephrite. "Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to find my date!"

"Hey," said Setsuna Meiyoh.

"Hey pretty lady," said Nephrite. "Looking good! Wanna hit the balcony?"

"Yeah boy," said Setsuna.

Her and Nephrite headed on their ways.

"The balcony sounds nice," said Beryl. "Endymion, why don't we go dance there?"

"Actually," said Endymion. "I heard the Moon Princess will be making an appearance soon!"

"So?" demanded Beryl.

"W-well," sputtered Endymion, blushing. "It's just, ya know, polite for the prince to stick around for it! Heh heh!"

"I hate that girl," said Beryl. "I will end her one day! I hope!"

"Hang in there," said Kunzite.

Kunzite and Zoisite took off.

"Yeah," said Zoisite. "So Endymion set me up on this date with this blue-haired girl."

"Hmm," said Kunzite. "Have you ever met her?"

"No," said Zoisite. "I hope she's not generic."

"Yes," agreed Kunzite. "I hope Princess Venus is not either."

"Too bad Endymion didn't set up Jadeite with anyone," noted Zoisite.

"I think he did," said Kunzite. "But Jed was too shy and had to turn her down."

"Dumb kid," said Zoisite. "Let's go make fun of him in the bathroom!"

They went to make fun of Jadeite in the bathroom, but they ran into people in the hall.

"Hey, you have blue hair!" noted Zoisite.

"Yes," said the soon-to-be Ami.

"Oh boy," said Zoisite. "So are you the princess of a habitable planet?"

"No," said Ami sadly. "I kind of just live on the moon because it is too hot on Mercury."

"Hmm," said Zoisite.

"Do you like reading?" asked Mercury.

"No," said Zoisite.

"Uh oh," said Mercury.

"Sorry," said Zoisite. "I just thought people would have more personality in the Silver Millennium. But everyone is pretty much an OC, huh?"

Mercury was somehow offended by this, and she frowned sadly.


"Hi," said Venus to Kunzite.

"Hey," said Kunzite. "Aren't you a little young to be a princess?"

"I'm like 18 or something back then," said Venus.

"Good," said Kunzite. "I think I'm 20 something. Who knows?"

"You should," said Venus. "This is your first life."

"Huh," considered Kunzite. "So…"

He waited.

Venus didn't say anything.

"Nice hair," said Kunzite. "It is a good color."

"Yours is a cool color too," said Venus awkwardly. "Oh look, Serenity is coming out! I have to go guard her!"

"Ok, hurry back," said Kunzite. "But take your time."


Jadeite sat down on the toilet and locked the door.

He put his feet up so no one could see he was in there.

He took out his Android device and launched up iFunny.

"Heh," he laughed a couple pictures in, but was sure to not laugh too loud.

"Good thing my plan lets me get wi-fi anywhere, even on the moon!" said Jadeite. "You know, this isn't half bad. It's kind of hard to breathe though."


"Wowee, this is the most wonderful night ever!" said Beryl.

"Yeah, uh huh," said Endymion.

Beryl looked up at him dreamily.

But his eyes were somewhere else.

"Stop looking at that Serenity clown!" yelled Beryl. "Look at meEEEEEEEEEEE!"

"Yeah, uh huh," said Endymion. "Sorry. Alright, let's dance."

Beryl started to giggle. "I can't believe this guy and I are really dating! The prince of Earth, would you look at that! I'm moving up in the world!"

"Yeah, uh huh," said Endymion. "Let's face this way."

He turned so that Beryl's back was to Serenity and he could get a good look.

"Mmmm," said Endymion.

"Mmmm," said Beryl.


Kunzite danced with Venus beside Zoisite, who was dancing with Ami.

"So," said Mercury. "I read a good book the other day."

"Nice," said Zoisite. "Every book is a good book to someone."

"Why, that is so true!" agreed Mercury. "I never knew you were so wise!"

"Sure," said Zoisite. But in his mind he was very bored.

Meanwhile Kunzite wasn't having it any easier.

Kunzite waited for Venus to say something but she seemed content not saying anything.

"What is going on in her head?" wondered Kunzite.

Kunzite was also pretty bored.

"Hmm," he said to himself.


"That punch looks good over all the way across the room," pointed out Endymion suddenly.

"There's punch at this table right here," said Beryl.

"No," said Endymion. "The bowl across the room looks better. Wanna go get me some?"

"YESSSSSSS!" shouted Beryl.

She skittered away.

Endymion wiped the sweat from his brow.

"Phew," he sighed.

Then he walked to the stage.

"Hey princess, ready to dance?"

"Yeeee!" said Serenity.

Endymion put on the mask that matched his tuxedo.

"Let's roll!"


"Man, I've seen all the new iFunny pics," said Jadeite sadly.

He opened Instagram but he had no followers.

"Time to play some Angry Birds," he decided.

He launched up the game and waited patiently at the logo.

He got on his latest level.

"Oh yeah, I can't get past this one," he remembered. "Too tough."

He closed the game and launched up YouTube.


Beryl wandered the ballroom for many hours searching for Endymion.

But then she finally spotted him.

"Yay!" she said. "I can finally give him this punch!"

But that's when she dropped the glass.

Dancing with Endymion was none other than Princess Serenity.

Beryl shrieked at the top of her lungs, so loud that they had to turn off the music.

Everyone turned to Beryl and made a circle around her and Endymion.

"What is this?!" demanded Beryl. "Mind your own business, moon trash! This is between me and my boyfriend!"

"Well actually," said Endymion.

"Can it!" said Beryl. "Do you know how much a fortune teller makes?! I had to save up for 10 years to get this dress! And then you're off with some MOON SLEAZE!"

"Hey," said Princess Serenity. "Who are you calling a moon sleaze, you Earth scum!"

"Stay out of this," warned Beryl. "If you don't wanna leave in a stretcher!"

"Don't push your luck!" said Princess Serenity, getting a little feisty.

Beryl was up to her wits' end.

"Endymion!" she yelled. "Tell this loser that she means nothing to you, and apologize to me this instant!"

"Well," said Endymion. "Uh, every life is precious, so…"

"Are you saying you're not my boyfriend?!" cried Beryl.

"I never said I was," said Endymion. "I see you as like… a pal. A chum, per se."

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" shrieked Beryl. "How dare you!"

She ran over to a huge ice sculpture in the middle of the room and kicked it with her foot.

A huge crystal of ice broke off, and she grabbed it in both her hands and lifted it above her head.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" she shrieked. "YOU ARE MIIIIIIIIIINE!"

She threw it right at Endymion, and Princess Serenity leapt in the way and tanked the shot.

"No!" said all the guards. "We did nothing to stop this!'

"My sword isn't even real," said one of the guards.

Beryl threw herself at Serenity, taking her to the ground.

"Hey!" said Queen Serenity. "I take this as an act of war! You Earthlings are forbidden from my planet!"

"No!" cried Endymion. "What did I do?! I don't even know this crazy lady!"

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" shrieked Beryl while she threw punches to Serenity's exposed torso.

Mercury looked over. "Oh my gosh, our princess is being assaulted by some Earth trash!"

"Hey now," said Kunzite. "Not all Earthlings are bad. We are a peaceful species that mean you no harm!"

"We have to save her!" cried Venus.

The two dashed over to the scrap.

"FINALLY," said Zoisite. "That lady was a snorefest! I thought my life was passing me by."

"Yes," agreed Kunzite.

Zoisite and Kunzite stood there for a long time while all hell broke loose.

"So," said Zoisite. "Wanna, like… dance or something?"

"Wouldn't that be a little weird?" asked Kunzite.

"Hey, no homo!" said Zoisite. "I'm a straight guy! 100%! We're just having a bro dance."

"If you say so," said Kunzite. "As long as this isn't gay."

"Don't worry," assured Zoisite.

"Mmm, good dance," said Kunzite.

"Heh," said Zoisite. "Hey, why am I blushing?"


A guard tried to pry Beryl off the princess's brutally bashed corpse, but non-queen Beryl threw a punch.

"Oww!" cried the guard. "I am defeated! The Earthlings are too strong!"

He laid down and died.

"NOOOOO!" cried Artemis. "One of ours has been killed! Everyone, stop what you're doing and fight for your moon!"

The moon civilians started throwing themselves at Endymion and Beryl.

"Hey!" said Endymion.

That's when the four Senshi threw themselves at Endymion and got him in a pile driver.

Queen Serenity tried to calm everyone down, but it wasn't working so she had to flee before she got attacked in the madness.

The Senshi all shot their season one attacks, but Endymion leapt out of the way.

"Easy," he said.

Artemis suddenly latched onto his leg and wouldn't let go.

"Noooo!" said Endymion as he was toppled.

That's when Beryl threw herself on Artemis, crushing him.

"AHHHHH! LUNA!" cried Artemis.

"ARTEEEMIIIS!" cried Luna. "Someone save him!"

"This is all your fault, Beryl!" shouted Endymion. "You ruined everything!"

"I'm still not done with you," said Beryl. "You will meet with a terrible fate!"

"Shut up, peasant!" said Endymion, losing his cool.

A moon guard socked him across the chops, and he was tossed across the room.

"NO!" cried Beryl. "He's a good man despite his many flaws!"

Suddenly two moon guards got Endymion in a chokehold, and one of them had a box cutter.

"No!" cried Endymion. "I had so much to live for!"

"Not on my watch!" shouted Nephrite.

He ran up and drop-kicked the guards, killing them both with a single drop-kick.

"Thanks," said Endymion.

"Of course," said Nephrite. "I'm your loyal warrior!"

"Good, I know it will always stay that way," said Endymion warmly.

That's when Zoisite and Kunzite appeared suddenly.

"No," said Venus. "We can't fight!"

"Sadly my hands are tied," said Kunzite.

"By the way," said Zoisite to Mercury. "Your blue hair is stupid! HahahahAH!"

"Woah," said Endymion. "Don't talk to a princess like that!"

But then Mercury shot her bubbles in his face, and he retaliated with a backhand.

"Hey!" said Mars who was first showing her face now. "Don't hit my girl!"

She shot fire at Endymion, but Nephrite summoned his regular metal shield and blocked the attack.

The Shitennou summoned their weapons.

"Man, where is Jadeite?" wondered Kunzite. "Is he really still in the bathroom?"

"Pathetic," said Zoisite.

Suddenly they saw something they never thought they would see.

Jadeite emerged from the bathroom.

"Sorry guys," he said. "My date just went home."

"Down the toilet?" asked Nephrite.

"No," said Jadeite. "There's a window in there."

"Just drop the act," said Kunzite. "We know you were in there on your phone."

"NOOOO! I wasn't!" insisted Jadeite.

"Just admit it," said Zoisite. "And we'll never bring it up again! Not even in flashback!"

"Fine," said Jadeite. "I was in the bathroom the whole time."

"Heh heh," said Nephrite.

They disposed of the entire Moon Kingdom army with little effort.

Beryl took great note at how easily the army was toppled and wrote it down in her notebook.

But then, the princess's guardian princesses got in their battle stances.

"We're not afraid of you!" said Mars.

"Sorry," said Zoisite. "I can't fight girls."

That's when Venus socked Zoisite in the chops, and Zoisite retaliated with a backhand.

"IT'S ON NOW!" yelled Jupiter, firing lightning.

"Woah, they have magic attacks!" cried Jadeite jumping out of the way.

Kunzite fired a generic energy blast, similar to the infamous beam on Motoki.

But Venus countered it with her own beam.

"No!" said Kunzite. "Just her lucky day!"

He shot another generic energy blast, and this one sent Mercury for a ride.

Nephrite charged with his scythe and shield.

But the Sailor Scouts were quicker than they looked.

Mars knocked his scythe away with her same fire attack, but then Nephrite threw his shield like a disc and bopped her on the head.

"OW!" she shouted.

Zoisite ran up during the chaos and quickly stabbed Jupiter with his sword, then quickly retreated.

"AHH!" yelled Jupiter. "Medic!"

The medics tried to heal her but Jadeite decapitated them.

Jupiter had to keep fighting though, and she zapped Jadeite, tossing him across the room.

"This isn't fair!" yelled Kunzite. "We're evenly matched with these princesses!"

"Sad times," said Zoisite. "Maybe we'll get a power-up someday, and then we'll be multiple times stronger than them!"

"We can only hope," said Nephrite. "I hope it's some kind of dark energy. That'd be pretty cool."

Jadeite had now climbed to his feet, and he ran up and got Princess Serenity in a full nelson.

The others were busy fighting, so Jed turned to Endymion.

"Quick, Endymion!" he called. "Throw punches to her exposed torso!"

"NO!" cried Endymion. "Let her go!"

"Sorry, I can't," said Jadeite. "If you're not going to help then this will be a lot harder!"

"I will not," said Endymion sadly.

"Fine," said Jadeite. He threw himself backwards, taking Serenity with him into a table.

Luna and Artemis latched onto Jed's foot.

"Stop it, you monster!" yelled Luna as he threw punches at the moon princess.

"Leave my daughter alone!" yelled Queen Serenity.

"Hey welcome back," said Kunzite. "Yeah, I saw you flee."

That's when Venus fired a beam at him, but he slashed through it with his sword, and then blocked Mars' fireball with his shield.

"I remember when I used to physically fight," he said.

"Enough!" yelled Queen Serenity.

She raised the moon wand right as Beryl made a rogue dash towards Serenity with one of the guard's spear.

That's when the Silver Crystal started to glow, and everyone froze in their tracks.

"Let's leg it," said Endymion.

He took off and his Shitennou followed him.

Beryl slowly put down the spear and backed away with her hands up.

"I'll be back!" she yelled.

They hopped back in the limo, except for Nephrite.

"Wait!" called Sailor Pluto, who was waiting at the limo.

"Setsuna," said Nephrite. "I'm afraid this is goodbye."

"Goodbye," said Setsuna. "I may never see you again."

"Goodbye," repeated Nephrite. "Say, where are the other Outers?"

"Space," said Setsuna.

"Okey doke," said Nephrite. "So long."

"I will never forget you!" called Pluto.

"Peace out!" yelled Neph.

"Well that was a disaster," said Endymion as the driver took them through space.

"I really did have a date though," lied Jadeite.

"Be quiet, kid," said Beryl. "I heard you admit that you didn't have one."

"No, I was kidding!" said Jadeite. "I really did! She climbed out the bathroom window!"

"Just let it go," said Zoisite. "You're just embarrassing yourself."

"But I'm not!" insisted Jadeite. "She was real!"

"Jadeite," said Kunzite. But Kunzite just shook his head.


"I really did have a girlfriend!" concluded Jadeite in present. "You all were too busy and did not see her!"

"Jadeite, it's been a thousand years," said Beryl. "You did not have a girlfriend."

"Well, you didn't have a boyfriend!" retorted Jadeite.

Queen Beryl put Jed in an eternal sleep.

"She's still salty about it," said Zoisite.

"Hey," considered Nephrite. "How do we remember that prom but not anything about the Silver Crystal or the Rainbow Crystals?"

"I remember it," said Kunzite. "But no one asked me. So we had to wait for Metalia to awake."

"I wonder where Metalia was at prom," said Jadeite, suddenly unthawing from his slumber.

"I met her that night, actually," said Beryl. "She was in some kind of seal, and I broke it with some hocus pocus magic. And then she made me queen!"

"Lucky dog," said Jed. "That should have been me."

"You must have been too busy hiding in the bathroom," taunted Nephrite.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" screamed Jadeite. He fled from the room and hid in the bathroom.

"How did he unthaw?" wondered Beryl. "I should get my ball checked."

FIN