The Jaguar Versus the Wolf

Chapter 21 - Never Gonna Happen

Orbiting Satellites Book Two, Chapter 21 - Uncomfortable Reality companion


"Whatcha doing Nahuel?" Jennifer asked me as she plopped down on my bed.

I know Joham, and my sisters, live differently than my Aunt and I do in the jungle. They live in the modern world, complete with walls, floors, ceilings, electricity and so on but they didn't have the kind of money that the Cullens did. Though I never visited my father before (wherever he lived) I could tell in subtle ways. She didn't outright tell me anything but it was obvious once I started paying attention. The amount of clothes that were in my closet for one thing - she was shocked at the vast amounts, and ecstatic at everything Alice had bought her, even though only a small portion fit. The sizes of the houses the Cullens were living in was another, even though the current ones were much smaller than the house they used to live in, in Washington. And then there were the beds. I'm guessing she normally slept on a much less comfortable mattress; by the way she would jump up and down on the one in the guest room at times, or caress and snuggle under the covers at others. It almost seemed like she was in love with the thing.

"I made a belt for Renesmee. The Cullens are throwing her a birthday party tonight," I told her as I held it up. I've been working on it for over a week now and just needed to wrap it.

Jennifer eyed it appreciatively as I put it in the box. "Pretty. So when's this party?"

"Just after dinner. You should come, there'll be cake. Have you ever tried it? It's delicious."

She made a face in disgust. "I don't know how you can eat that stuff. Human food is nasty. Humans on the other hand… I think I'll go hunt and meet you back here tonight." I didn't say anything but shot her a look. "Don't worry, I'll be home in time for the little nympho's party." That was not what I was worried about.

"Don't call her that and make sure you feed out of state. The Cullens are vegetarians."

"I know, I know." My sister was good like that. While she had no intention of switching her diet, she wasn't going to intentionally cause any problems for the Cullens.

"You know I'm gonna miss seeing you every day."

"Huh?" What was she talking about?

'I've already been here for eight days. I originally planned on only staying a day or two." Did she really think she could convince me to give up on having any kind of meaningful relationship with Renesmee, and leave with her in just two days?

"Are you sure you don't want to stay longer? The Cullens won't mind." Despite what she tried to do I really liked having my sister here. I hardly ever got to see her.

"I can't. Father is expecting me. If I'm not back in a few days he'll start to worry," she told me before she took off.

After I finished wrapping Renesmee's belt, adding Jennifer's name to the card next to my own, I busied myself in my greenhouse for a few hours, ate lunch then went back and just relaxed among the foliage until my stomach started rumbling. Glancing at the wall clock in the adjacent room, I saw that I had zoned out through dinner and it was already time for Renesmee's birthday party to begin.

There would probably be Alice's usual giant cake at the party but I needed something more substantial. While I swept by the kitchen and grabbed a snack I looked around for Jennifer. I hadn't heard her come back. She must still be out hunting. It was a comfort to know she'd listened and obviously traveled far enough outside of the Cullens jurisdiction to feed, but I also had hoped she'd attend the party with me. I'd hoped that if she saw me with Renesmee and her family, and see how good we all got along she might begin to soften her opinion of our unconventional relationship.

"Nahuel, there you are," Renesmee said running up to me, a few minutes later, when I finally made it to her party. She was followed by the dog… and Jennifer. "I was starting to get worried. Alice was just about to… well you're here now." she half-heartedly smiled, not mentioning whatever Alice had threatened.

"Sorry about that," I apologized as I handed her the gift I'd wrapped. Instead of opening it she placed it on a table with all the others.

Close by was the usual immensely overboard cake, this time decorated in purple stripes and gold accented bow icing. Looking around the room I saw that the purple/gold color scheme was not only repeated on the tablecloths, cups and napkins but the normal taupe pillows on the couches, and various other knick-knacks around the room had been switched out for ones in color coordinated party hues as well.

I was looking forward to Renesmee opening my gift but first had to sit through Edward's impromptu piano concert. Bella took a seat next to her husband as he played and the other mated Cullens began dancing with each other in a cleared out section of the living room where the couches and coffee tables use to reside.

"Renesmee, I… um… would you like to dance?"

Oh, no! Why was Jennifer asking Renesmee to dance? The dog looked just as confused as me, then relieved as she agreed, giggling all the way onto the dance floor. He mistakenly saw my sister as less dangerous than me. No matter.

"Thanks, for agreeing to this," Jennifer whispered into her ear as they locked arms. "I really just wanted to get a chance to talk to you one on one, without my brother interjecting himself into the conversation again."

Bosta! This was all I needed. I started making my way across the room to them, but by the time I got past all the moving couples Renesmee and my sister had disappeared.

"Have a seat Nahuel," Edward said, clearly knowing where they'd gone. "You too Jacob," he added as the dog was about to head out the front door. "They'll be fine." He huffed, turned around and sat as close as he could to the door. The rest of the Cullens seemed oblivious as they continued to dance, while I glared between the dog and the door, and he fidgeted, glaring between the door and Edward.

"Time for presents!" Alice eventually sang out over the music. A second later Renesmee and Jennifer walked back into the house.

Renesmee was immediately enveloped between Alice and the dog. While she began opening her gifts I decided to find out what they'd discussed.

"What happened when you left?" I asked Jennifer after pulling her into the next room. The soundproofed walls and door would ensure no one would hear us.

"After I hunted I got the girl a birthday present. Why?"

"That's not what I meant and you know it."

"I know, I know," she chuckled. "Calm down. You're so stressed lately. I just wanted to talk to her, myself, without you butting in so I could find out what she really was like."

"And?" I prodded when she didn't immediately continue.

She huffed and started walking around in circles. "I was wrong before. Renesmee is a lovely girl." Why didn't that make me feel happy? Probably because I knew she wasn't done. Whatever she was about to say I knew I wasn't going to like. She was twisting the rings on her fingers around and around… a nervous habit she'd picked up whenever she wanted to tell me something about our father she knew would upset me. "I don't think she's ever gonna be your mate. It's a pipe dream, one that I don't even understand why you would want. It's obvious she loves Jacob."

"I know that," I admitted. "Renesmee has told me so herself. But she can love me too. Sheesh, can't we go one day without someone reminding me of Renesmee and the dogs feelings for one another?

"You know you've got to stop this. Move on. It's not good for you to keep going on..."

I didn't want to hear this anymore. My sister kept talking but I turned my back to her and like a child covered my ears. "No! Renesmee will be mine someday, just wait and see," I shouted back to her.

"I can see nothing I say is going to get through to you. Well I guess it's a good thing that I'll be leaving soon." she sighed. "Good luck Nahuel. For your sake I hope I'm wrong."

The next morning I drove my sister to the airport. Her flight ended up being delayed for hours. After our talk last night it was awkward between us for the first time ever. Jennifer told me I could go; that she was more than capable waiting for her flight on her own, but I couldn't do that to her. At the very least I could offer to keep her company. So what was originally an hour and a half drive there, arriving two hours before her flight so she could check her and her bags in and then an hour and a half drive back ended up taking over nineteen hours.

I didn't get back to the Cullens till early the next morning. I was tired, hungry, and wanted my bed. But first I needed to let Renesmee know I was back. We were supposed to have lunch together, but I just wanted to grab a snack and sleep for at least six hours. I needed to let her know.

Parking Bella's car back in the garage I saw that only Edwards was missing. It wasn't her scheduled hunting day so most likely Renesmee was home. Walking into the house I didn't hear her but was easily able to follow her, and the dogs, scents upstairs to the movie room.

"We managed to stay awake all night long. Do you want to go to our bedroom or just stay here?" I heard Renesmee ask the dog right before she kissed him. Not that I saw her do it. They must have been lying on the couch and the tall back was in the way. But just because I couldn't see them didn't mean I didn't hear anything. Gross! I've sat on that couch, watched movies on that couch, watched movies with Renesmee on that couch. Knowing they were about to start humping on the thing made my stomach turn.

"Whatever you want, honey. Love ya," he mumbled back, followed by more kissing noises. Argh!

"I love you too, my Jacob." The next thing I saw, was her jumping on top of him.

I couldn't take this anymore. I completely lost it. After hours spent at the airport, in uncomfortable chairs, surrounded by smelly, dirty, loud, disgusting humans I come home to… to THIS!

That was it. I was done.

Slamming the door probably wasn't the smartest thing I'd ever done. Until I did that they hadn't even noticed I was there, too wrapped up in their couch screwing to notice anyone, or anything, else. But the noise alerted them to my presence and as I ran through the forest I could hear them behind me.

Bosta! I could have made a clean break, a clear getaway, if not for my anger getting the better of me. They might have thought I just left with my sister. And if, or when, Renesmee eventually ever realized I was gone and bothered to call I could have lied and confirmed it.

I wanted to outrun them. I didn't want to have the impending conversation that was about to happen, but I couldn't shake them.

Giving up I stopped, turned around, and saw the two worst creatures that had ever entered my life! "RENESMEE, I CAN'T TAKE THIS ANYMORE. I cannot be in a relationship with you AND him!" I screamed, while pointed to her dog. "I don't think I can stand to be the other MAN anymore. I don't want to share you. Your lapdog might be brainwashed into thinking that this is acceptable, but I do not!"

"Hey, I thought you loved Nessie?" the dog yelled back. "Why are you so selfish? It's not always about what you want; sometimes you have to make sacrifices for the one you love. Don't you care about her?" Seriously? Besides my Aunt, and sisters, Renesmee was the only thing I ever tried caring about. "Of course not! You only care about yourself. How did Edward ever convince me that you had really changed? I should have known better."

If the dog wanted a fight I'd give him a fight. Once I ended him Renesmee would finally be mine. With a growl I ran straight at him. If I could take him out before he even got a chance to turn into a giant walking flea bag this could be quick and easy. For his size he went down surprisingly easy, breaking a few bones by the sound of it.

Excellent!

I was about to say something witty about how he should go back to play with his puppy pack, thinking he wouldn't be able to do much, since I had injured him so quickly, but before I could he erupted into his giant dog self.

The next thing I knew the dog had pinned me to the ground and was growling in my face.

"STOP IT! Both of you," Renesmee yelled, running to the small space between us and pushing him off of me.

That was all I needed, having to be rescued by her. While I didn't want to end up dog chow I also didn't need her fighting my battles for me.

"Look. I'm sorry about what you saw back there between Nessie and me, but we can make this work," the dog weirdly started apologizing, as soon as he returned to his human form. "You just have to get used to it. I know it's different but it could still…" he continued until Renesmee grabbed his arm, and must have said something with her gift, because I didn't hear a word from her, but the next thing he said was "Nessie, please!"

Please what?

No, I didn't care. I was done. Done with her… and certainly done with her dog. And done with the secret conversations the two of them always seemed to have.

"Nahuel, I'm sorry. I thought this would work..." she began dryly before I cut her off.

"I'm DONE trying to make this work." I needed to calm down enough that I could leave, without her thinking I was just angry. I didn't want her coming after me again. "I'm sorry. I realize that you were upfront with me regarding the two of you, but I just cannot do it anymore. Just the thought of it is more than I can tolerate. It's one thing to know something, but, it is another to have it," I pointed at her dog, "shoved in my face."

"Nahuel, I'm sorry. I never meant to upset you. But I'm Jake's Imprint. This is the way it has to be with us," Renesmee shrugged. "I love him, and he loves me. That's never going to change. If you can't deal with that then I don't see us having a future together."

"I need to think about some things… take a break from us for awhile," I said, intentionally appearing to calm down even more.

"Um, alright," she sighed. "If that's how you feel. I'm sorry about all of this. I know you've been through so much. And you changed so much, giving up blood and um... women, moving here, away from your family just to be with me. I never meant to hurt you," she said as she attempted to grab my arm.

"Yes, well…" I flung her hand off of me; she would NOT sucker me back in, "I have a lot of thinking to do. I need some time alone, excuse me." I ran off. Not sure where I was going, but I knew one thing, it would be in the opposite direction of the Cullens house.