"Queen Beryl!" yelled Jadeite. "I found a new source of energy!"
"Jadeite," said Beryl. "I have a task to bestow upon you."
"Don't worry," said Jadeite. "I'm already getting energy!"
"No, no," said Beryl
Jadeite waited.
Beryl waited.
She was reading text messages off her ball as Jadeite stood there.
"Heh," said Beryl.
"What?" asked Jadeite.
"Sorry," said Beryl. "It's an inside joke."
Then she started laughing.
Jadeite waited impatiently.
"Oh, Jadeite, you're still here," said Beryl after a few more minutes. "What were we talking about?"
"You said you had a task," said Jadeite.
"Yes," said Beryl. "Gather the others."
"Why?" asked Jadeite.
"Are you questioning my order?" asked Beryl.
"Yes," said Jadeite.
"Ah," said Beryl. "What if I told you it was the Great Ruler's order?"
"I don't even know who that is," said Jadeite. "I've only heard you mention her once or twice."
"Ah," said Beryl.
Queen Beryl sounded her horn, summoning the other Shitennou.
"Zoisite," said Beryl. "Why are you in a maid's costume?"
"Sorry," said Zoisite. "We were doing house cleaning today."
"Gay," said Nephrite. "What do you want, Beryl? I have much more important things to be doing right now."
"Guys," said Beryl. "I need you to retrieve a Youma for me. She is our strongest Youma."
"I thought Thetis was our strongest Youma," said Jed.
"I thought the DD Girls were our strongest Youmas," said Kunzite.
"There are hardly any Youmas shown that are full-blooded Youmas after Thetis," said Beryl. "The last I could think of were those three flower girls that Nephrite defeated with ease. But this special Youma is very mighty."
"What about the DD Girls?" asked Kunzite again.
"I'm pretty sure those are just people you turned into monsters," said Beryl. "No Youmas are that strong."
"Did I?" wondered Kunzite, thinking back. "They were pretty humanoid compared to most Youmas," he admitted.
"Anyway," said Beryl. "This Youma can create tornados."
"They why didn't we use her?" asked Jed.
"Well," said Beryl. "She's not very… civilized. The last I saw her she was crawling on all fours. She resembles that feral Youma that attacked Nephrite, or that beast Rei's grandfather became."
"Those are feral creatures," said Zoisite.
"How do you expect us to get any use out of that thing?" said Kunzite.
"Well, I was thinking," said Beryl. "Maybe we could get some reins on it and possibly hit it with a whip to get it to behave."
"Some Youmas, our Great Ruler did not spend enough time creating," said Jadeite sadly.
"Where do we find this feral beast?" asked Zoisite.
"Well," said Beryl. "Remember that time you were crying on Kunzite on a bench, and it was in a forest-like area?"
"Wait, when did this happen?" asked Nephrite.
"After you stole Zoisite's job," explained Beryl.
Nephrite burst into laughter and fell to the floor.
"Kunzite," said Zoisite. "End him!"
"Well, gee, I don't know… I… uh…"
"Useless," sighed Zoisite. "Hey wait a minute, why were you watching us, Beryl?"
"I know everything that happens in the Negaverse," stated Beryl. "And at that one specific shipping yard."
"Sp00ky," said Zoisite.
"Go retrieve my beast," said Beryl.
The four Shitennou entered the Negaverse jungle.
"Woah," said Jadeite. "I didn't know we had a jungle! I could have made a treehouse instead of just living in some dark space!"
Suddenly there was a loud screech like an ape, and Zoisite leapt into Kunzite's arms like Scooby Doo.
"What is that?!" cried Zoisite.
"Just a feral beast," said Kunzite. "This is where the uncivilized Youmas tend to flock."
"Ah, I recognize this bench!" said Zoisite. "This is where we called none other than Yasha!"
Kunzite shook his head. "Feral creature couldn't even hide her energy like some of the more advanced Youmas."
Just then a pterodactyl Youma swooped in.
"Stand back, Zoisite!" yelled Kunzite. "I'll protect you!"
That's when the Youma swooped over Kunzite's head and snatched Zoisite, and flew off into the jungle.
"AFTER IT!" yelled Kunzite.
Nephrite shrugged and followed at a walking pace as Kunzite dashed into the thicket.
"We're the Great Four!" shouted Kunzite as he ran. "You dare disrespect us, beast?!"
"They don't listen!" screamed Zoisite from far away. "They're clearly too stupid to know who we are! Yasha just attacked Nephrite like some kind of suicidal buffoon!"
"I'll catch that monster!" called Jadeite.
He did a wild leap and grabbed the pterodactyl Youma by the foot.
It let out a screech, and Jadeite hung on for dear life.
Jadeite was taken for quite the ride, but then he lost his grip and was tossed into a tree, where he tumbled down along with a lot of leaves.
Kunzite shot the beam he shot at the two cats on his final episode, straight for the pterodactyl monster.
It was a direct hit, and the pterodactyl fell down like a crashing plane.
It let out one last screech and then exploded to dust.
Zoisite was coughing after he hit the ground because he was very injured.
Kunzite finally caught up.
"Are you okay?" he asked.
"Not really," said Zoisite. "What a monster! Why would Metalia make such a simple creature?"
"I ask myself that every day," said Kunzite.
Nephrite caught up moments later, and Jed caught up moments after that.
"Where are we?" asked Jed.
"Uh oh," said Kunzite. "I think we're lost."
"Which direction does the Negasun set?" asked Nephrite. "We can gain our bearings if we know."
"There is no Negasun," said Zoisite. "Only darkness."
"From here on out, we have to be more careful," said Kunzite. "Any Youma we encounter this deep into the thicket will be more animaloid than humanoid. Don't even bother to try speaking to them. They don't understand the Negaverse language."
The Shitennou nodded, and then continued very carefully deeper into the woods.
"How far does this thing go?" wondered Jadeite.
"Since we're inside the Earth, it'd be about the size of the surface of the Earth," said Nephrite.
"Ah, good," said Zoisite. "That at least means it's round."
As they continued walking, Jadeite was fascinated by the jungle environment.
"What kind of trees are these?" he asked. "Is this soil on the ground? Where do they get water? The Negaverse never rains. Do they bare some kind of fruit?"
"Quiet," said Zoisite. "No civilized creature has set foot in this territory before. We're sticking out like a sore thumb as it is."
Just then they began to hear some more rustling.
Zoisite was shaking.
"Stop that," said Jadeite. "They can sense our fear. They probably have animal-like senses so they can smell us."
"Don't worry," said Kunzite. "I'll prot-"
That's when a huge cat-like being pounced out of the thicket and lunged at Zoisite.
"Why me?!" cried Zoisite.
"They can smell your fear," said Jadeite.
Kunzite slid in and socked the beast, tossing it backwards.
But all that did was anger the animal.
It let out a ferocious roar, and tried to swat Kunzite across the face with its animal claw.
But Kunzite put up a barrier, and the creature's paw shattered against it because it was too uncivilized to pull back.
The creature let out a mighty howl, summoning its pack.
"Let's get out of here!" said Jadeite.
But that's when an unidentifiable creature got him by the neck and leapt back into the thicket while Kunzite and Nephrite tried to deal with the large cat at hand.
Finally, Nephrite was able to knock it to the floor, and stomp it until it was dust.
"Phew," said everyone.
"Hey," said Zoisite. "Where's Jadeite?"
That's when three more beasts that resembled no particular animal, but were about as far from being human as an inanimate object, leapt at each of the three remaining Shitennou.
Zoisite became petals and tried to fly away, but the creature he was fighting swung its big meaty arm, creating such a gale that Zoisite's petals were slammed into a tree, and Zoisite reformed.
"AHHH!" screamed Zoisite as the beast picked him up in its mouth.
Nephrite was on the ground, wrestling a bear-like creature, while Kunzite was toying with a simple beast.
"Stop toying and help me!" yelled Zoisite, as he was chewed like a piece of bubblegum.
"Fine," said Kunzite. He shot a beam, killing the beast, and then drop-kicked Zoisite's monster into a tree.
But when the monster collided with the tree, it shook the tree so much that a nest of eggs fell to the floor and cracked open.
Out of the eggs emerged several terrifying beasts, which swarmed Kunzite like a pack of buzzards.
"Get off me!" he yelled, swinging in all directions.
Nephrite finally overpowered his monster, and finished it off.
But three more monsters took its place, and one got him in a full nelson while the others threw punches to his exposed torso.
Kunzite had now overcome the hatchlings, and pulled one of the Youmas off of Nephrite.
But that's when five more appeared and got Kunzite in a full nelson.
"This is it," said Kunzite. "Farewell!"
"Wait!" said Zoisite. He tried to wrestle away one of the Youmas, but it pinned him to the ground and gave him the one-two.
Nephrite killed his two remaining beasts by bonking their heads together, turning them each to dust.
He turned to the pack of Youmas that had Kunzite on the ground and were throwing kicks.
Nephrite shot "Starlight Attack!" and one of the beasts died, but he was shocked that the rest of them seemed to not have taken any damage.
Kunzite was finally able to free a hand and pull a Youma to the ground, where he ended it.
He leapt to his feet and the Youmas tried to run.
"Ah," said Nephrite curiously. "They do know the emotion fear. You'd think they wouldn't with that one that attacked me."
Kunzite chased down the Youmas and ended them.
Meanwhile, Nephrite stood there as the same Youma kept pummeling Zoisite.
"Need a hand?" asked Nephrite.
"No," said Zoisite, getting a blow to the chops.
Nephrite shrugged. "Suit yourself."
Kunzite returned and killed the Youma.
"Kunzite, let's head back," said Zoisite.
"We can't," said Kunzite. "We can't disobey Queen Beryl!"
"Rrr," said Zoisite, biting his thumb. "We must please the queen."
"Tornado man!" yelled Nephrite. "Where are you?!"
"It's hopeless," said Zoisite. "Why are we still looking?"
"I don't know," said Nephrite. "Maybe we'll find Jed. If we don't, he'll have to become one with the jungle."
"I don't see any difference between that guy and these beasts," said Kunzite. "They're both uncivilized and are very weak."
"Hey!" they heard in the distance. "Rude!"
"Jadeite?" called Zoisite.
"Ye!" yelled Jadeite. "Heeeeelp!"
"I don't know about this," said Zoisite. "It sounds like he's surrounded by beasts. Is it worth the risk?"
"No," said Nephrite. "But we have to go save him."
Nephrite headed towards the direction of Jadeite's shouts, and Kunzite and Zoisite followed him.
They crouched into some shrubbery at the edge of a clearing.
To their horror, the feral beasts were having some kind of feral ceremony. And they were cooking Jadeite alive!
Amongst the crowd were numerous Grandpa Youma clones, with different color palettes. They also had a beast that looked like she could have been ol' Yasha's sister.
"Hey!" called Jadeite spotting the boys. "Help me out of this over-sized soup cooker!"
The Youmas all turned in the direction Jadeite had been calling to.
"RUUUUN!" screamed Zoisite.
But they didn't have the time.
The Youmas attacked them like a pack of lions taking down a buffalo.
The Youmas easily overwhelmed the ultimate trio and shoved them in the soup pot with Jadeite.
"RIP," said Nephrite.
"Riperoo," said Zoisite.
"Well, you guys shouldn't have hesitated," said Jadeite. "You were only asking for them to attack you like a pack of lions taking down a buffalo."
The Youmas began their terrifying feral chant, and turned up the heat.
"I don't like my hot tubs this hot," said Kunzite. "We have to get out of here!"
"They outnumber us," said Jadeite. "And they lack morals or logic!"
"Come on," said Zoisite. "Surely we can outsmart a pack of animals! Even if I have to do so myself."
Zoisite turned to the herd.
"Hey creatures," said Zoisite. "If you let us out, I'll give you 20 more people to eat instead! How's that sound? Huh, boy?"
The varmint just growled.
"They don't understand our tongue," said Jadeite sadly.
"Right," realized Zoisite.
Kunzite thought fast and made an illusion, causing it to look like the forest was on fire.
The Youmas scattered, because fire was all they knew and they knew to fear it.
"AROOOO!" one Youma got up close and screeched.
Then it fled, and the Shitennou climbed out of the pot.
"Good thinking," said Zoisite.
"I could have done that too," said Nephrite.
"Me too," said Jadeite. "I burnt down all of Tokyo."
"I can do that with a green screen," said Zoisite. "And Sony Vegas 9.0."
"Why not ten?" asked Nephrite.
"Too expensive," said Zoisite.
They stood at the campfire for a few more minutes.
"Well, come on," said Kunzite. "Let's leg it before they come back."
They trekked for hours, or it felt like hours anyway.
That's when they encountered a robotic Youma.
"Whaaaaaat?" said Jadeite. "There's so many mysteries behind the Youma creation process."
"AHHHHHH!" screamed the metallic Youma in a voice that sounded much like a human.
It ran up and threw a wild punch, and Nephrite threw an elbow to its face, bringing it to the ground.
"I'll kill you, you bucket of bolts!" screamed Nephrite.
But it was a very resilient Youma, and sprung up like a spring.
It leapt at Nephrite like a panther, and he threw a kick, tossing it to the ground again.
"Take that, you metallic monstrosity!" added Nephrite. "Bolts for brains!"
The Youma was infuriated, as though it could understand their language, but it showed heavy signs of damage.
It threw a wild leaping kick.
"Shoot!" said Nephrite.
But that's when Kunzite swung his arm, and the Youma dropped to the ground and tried to stand up.
Jadeite shot lightning out of his palms and it short-circuited.
"It shouldn't have come alone," said Zoisite, as they headed onward.
It was starting to get chilly in the Negawoods, and Kunzite gave Zoisite his Shitennou jacket.
"Thanks," said Zoisite, wearing two.
"FOOOD!" they heard a scream.
"Uh oh," said Nephrite.
"We're not food, you gargoyle!" shouted Jadeite.
But to their surprise, it was a human that crawled out of the brush.
It was none other than Gamer Joe, from Tokyo.
"Odd," said Zoisite. "I could have sworn it would be Motoki."
"No," said Joe. "I hate that guy."
"Why are you here, Game Raider?" asked Kunzite.
"It all started long ago," said Joe. "I marched into the Negaverse with a pack of humans, but it went south fast. I took off into the distance and got lost. It was assumed I starved to death, but I actually survived by eating the Negafruits that grew on the Negatrees."
"Impressive," said Nephrite. He handed Joe a pack of Gushers that had been in his pocket for a long time.
"Fight on, strong one," he told Joe, leaving.
The Shitennou took off.
"I will," whispered Joe once they were gone.
They started to reach a marshier part of the Negaforest.
"Yuck, my boot," said Zoisite. "This is like that time I went scrounging in the sewers."
"Haha," said Nephrite, making the most out of the situation.
Zoisite gasped. "Are those some kind of carvings on that tree?!"
"Impossible," said Kunzite. "Unless Joe made them."
But they did not look like the work of Crane Raider, and in fact looked like the work of a very early Neanderthal.
"I think we're close to our destination," said Jed. "If only my GPS worked."
"OOOOOOOH!" screamed Nephrite. "Ober dere!"
"Huh?" said Kunzite.
"Over there," sighed Nephrite.
Off in the distance was a very primitive shelter, but the most advanced structure they had seen on their journey. It was like the shelter a primitive caveman might live in, but a little more run-down.
"This is it Luigi!" said Nephrite.
"I don't know what you're quoting," said Kunzite, getting frustrated.
They approached the shack.
"Do you have the reins ready?" asked Zoisite.
"Oh," said Kunzite. "I think I used them to strangle a Youma to death early on."
"What about the whip?"
"I think that was lost in the scuffling," frowned Kunzite. "I whipped one to dust, I believe, but then another one ate the whip."
"Ah well," said Nephrite. "I can overpower this creature, just leave it to me."
Nephrite stuck his head into the cave.
"Beast!" he shouted. "I am one of the Great Four!"
That's when the beast flew out.
It had the head of a monster and the body of a tornado, and that's how they knew it was the tornado creature they had been searching for.
"Stand down, beast!" ordered Kunzite.
But the beast threw a tornado at Kunzite.
Kunzite absorbed it. "Now, now," he said. "Please come with us peacefully."
That was when it threw a wild punch that Jadeite tanked.
"Stop it!" said Jadeite. "We don't wanna hurt you!"
But it just wouldn't back down, and started throwing tornados left and right.
"Good thing Youmas are weak," said Nephrite, casually dodging. "It'll run out of energy eventually."
But that warhorse seemed to have unlimited reserves, and kept throwing attacks nonstop.
"I'll just give it a quick tap, maybe calm it down a bit," said Jadeite.
Jadeite threw a powerful punch, socking the creature and causing it immense damage.
The creature let out a roar and went into maximum overdrive.
"Now you've just angered it!" scolded Kunzite.
The fiend just wouldn't stop throwing tornados, like it knew no other way of existence.
Kunzite and the others were forced to beat the creature to near-death, and it was laying on the ground greatly injured.
"Alright," said Kunzite. "You better behave now."
But that's when it sprung up with its last ounce of energy and threw a tornado.
Zoisite tried to tank it like he saw the others doing, but he lost his footing and got swept away.
In a last ditch effort, Zoisite tried to turn to petals and teleport away like he did against "Bonboo," however that was his biggest mistake yet, and the petals were swept away and torn to shreds in the tornado.
Zoisite was never seen again as the tornado flew off into the distance.
"ZOOOIISITE!" called Kunzite, but there was no response.
"You're gonna pay for that, devil!" shouted Kunzite, striking it again.
"Easy there," said Nephrite. "You're gonna kill it!"
"No," said Kunzite. "I'm just beating it to near-death."
"It's already at 1% power," argued Nephrite. "It can't possibly keep attacking now."
That's when the beast threw a weak punch, toppling Jed.
The Shitennou were finally forced to put it down.
"Sad," said Kunzite.
Kunzite rolled in Zoisite in a body cast to Queen Beryl's throne room.
He was flanked by Nephrite and Jadeite.
"Where is my Youma?" demanded Beryl.
"We didn't find it," lied Kunzite.
"Wrong," said Beryl. "I saw you kill it on my crystal ball."
"Then why did you ask where it was?" asked Kunzite.
"Why did you kill it?" said Beryl.
"Sadly," said Kunzite. "It was too rowdy. We had to put it down like one would put down an animal with rabies."
"Zoisite," said Beryl. "Did you think I wouldn't know?"
Zoisite was unable to talk from the neck brace and body cast, so he said nothing.
"It's time to face your fate," said Beryl.
Zoisite looked at Kunzite.
"Please wait," said Kunzite finally.
Zoisite tried to roll away but perished.
"Heh," said Nephrite. "Hey Beryl, when are you gonna kill someone not in a body cast?"
"Not today," said Beryl, fading into the ground.
FIN
