Chapter 5 – Lessons Learned
Beth's insides burned. A firing pain that swept through her limbs and down her spine. Her body steadily heated up until sweat poured from every crevasse. Shaking, Beth attempted to push herself off of whatever table she managed to crash out on. Unable to remember what happened. It came in bits : Being chained up. Scud negotiating with vampires. Her neck being ripped open by insanely sharp teeth. Nothing substantial though and the burning didn't help. It swarmed to the tip of her fingers and Beth wiggled them around to get the feeling to go away but moving only seemed to make the burn worse; speeding up the process until she cried out from the pain.
"Shh," someone whispered, brushing a finger across her forehead. "Going to get you some help." he continued as Beth felt herself being jostled. The fire moving to her bones as whoever it was lifted her up to carry her away. The move seemed to take hours. Every step sending another wave of pain throughout her body until she was laid down on something hard. The cold surface was a welcome relief to Beth's constant burning. It soothed her skin wherever it touched, though it did little for the heat radiating in her veins.
Scud could be heard somewhere in the distance, his voice carrying as he hollered out for Blade. When the man's sharp tone came out, he was hovering somewhere above her, demanding to know what happened.
"We were ambushed," Scud replied, moving to stand on the other side. "They came out of the alley."
"Hmm," was Blade's reply. She felt his hand moving her hair to the side and then down her arm where his fingertips slide across her wrists. "They chained her up?"
Beth could hear the double question. Blade knew Scud was lying about something and Beth swallowed, waiting for Scud's answer.
"They pinned her wrists. I don't know," he snapped, his hand moving her neck to the other side. "They bit her I know that. We need to help her."
Blade replied with another "hmm" and the sound of his boots hitting cement came to her. When he returned he barked out, "hold her." The last thing Beth remembered was Scud's hands resting on her stomach as something sharp was jammed into her neck. Again more burning, and this time Beth bucked at the pain. Twisting and turning as she tried to get away from whatever it was that Blade was injecting into her skin.
"Don't," she mumbled, attempting to push him away. Her limbs wouldn't respond to the commands and Beth was left with the searing pain that moved from her neck to her veins, and onto the rest of her body all over again. When the fire hit her spine, she arched up, bucking against the on slaught, before attempting to curl into her side, but a pair of hands kept her lying flat.
"How long?" Scud asked, now somewhere over her. Beth suspected that he was the one holding her down. The tremble in his voice brought back the words from earlier. Reminding her that he was willing to let her die in that room without a care.
'No,' she thought, reminding herself that he saved her. Somewhat.
"If she burns in the morning, you'll know," replied Blade, the coldness in his tone brought an unease to Beth's mind as she tried to figure out what was happening to her. She knew Reinhardt bite her, she wasn't about to forget that any time soon. The sound of him chuckling in her ear as he pulled away still rang inside her head, making her want to discard anything in her stomach. The vile rose in her throat, launching to her mouth before falling back down. Coughing, she attempted to turn to her side again and with Scud's help she was able to lean over the table and discard the contents.
Scud drew her hair back, continuing to rub soothing circles down her back until the retching stopped. When her breathing even out he attempted to pull her back onto the table, but the coolness of the steel eased the pain in her head and she fought him. Mumbling something that sounded strangely like "no, no, don't."
He eventually listened, and Beth was allowed to lay against the cold surface. It helped, a little. Though Beth wished the burning would stop. It seemed like her whole body was being consumed by flames. A never ending fire that swept through her system until the pain became too much, and she was tired of fighting whatever it was. Tired of feeling her limbs burning, and tired of wondering when it would stop. Exhaustion won out as she slipped into a fitful sleep.
When she woke again, there was light beaming in through a window up top, and she flinched away from the sight, turning toward the shadows as her hand came up to block the light from her eyes. The sound of a gun cocking over her head made her freeze. Blinking, she looked up to see the dark figure of Blade standing over her. One of his double barrels facing her, and a grim line on his face.
"You good?"
Beth turned, blinking up at him as the sun hit her face. She hated that he stood directly in the sunlight. It burned her eyes, but otherwise the annoyance was tolerable. She must have taken to long to answer, because Blade knelt, placing the end of the gun to her head.
"I'm good," Beth croaked. Her mouth was dry, full of cobwebs that until she swallowed something and said again, "I'm good."
The answer must have been sufficient because Blade stood up, the gun going back to its holster as he cocked his head to the side. When he didn't say anything, Beth rolled onto her back, placing an arm over her head. A headache started to form now that she managed to wake up, and Beth swallowed again as she rolled over. The memories were coming back now, swarming her already exhausted brain with images.
Someone attacking them from the ally. Waking up in chains surrounded by vampires that wanted to feed off of her; that did feed off of her. And Scud's deal with the lot of them. She didn't know the whole details, but she understood that he was supposed to be passing information about Blade to them and they wanted to use her. After Blade helping her - twice now- she didn't think she could do that to him.
The unwanted person came waltzing into the room, his eyes full of concern, and Beth turned away in disgust. He must have noticed the hostility in her expression because he slowed down, stopping several feet from her.
"Brought something to drink," he said, holding up the glass of water. Beth eyed the water for a moment before glancing at him. Grudgingly, she sat up, hanging her head between her legs. Half to avoid eye contact with him, and half because she was feeling a bit nauseous. His footsteps rung out in the empty room and before Beth could protest his shadow stood over hers.
"Here," he said, shoving the glass at her. Beth glanced up at the offered drink and swallowed, doing her best to ignore her parched throat. "Don't fight this. You know you need it."
Glaring at him, she grabbed the drink and sucked it down. "Slow down ,Z, you're going to make yourself sick." No sooner he spoke the words then Beth coughed up some water as it attempted to go down the wrong pipe. It sprayed across the ground and Scud backed away from her. "Told you."
Beth shoved the glass back at him, unwilling to respond to his goading as she attempted to stand. "Whoa, slow down," he said, pushing her shoulders to keep her down. "You need to take it slow."
Beth shoved him away, almost growling as she said, "don't touch me."
Scud stepped back, his finger flying to his mouth as he looked her up and down. Beth didn't bother hiding the anger that flared whenever she looked at him. The betrayal churned in her stomach like snakes, so she focused her attention on the floor. Unable to face him and say what she really wanted to, and not able to hide her anger either. She knew telling Blade was a death sentence to Scud, and she didn't have it in her heart to do that to him, but she couldn't face him right now either.
"Come on, Z," Scud said as Beth headed toward the door. Beth crossed her arms over her chest and kept on walking. "Z," he hollered a second time and Beth took in a deep breath. She was just stepping out of the door, taking in Blades large frame on the other end of the building just as a hand grabbed a hold over arm and pulled her back into the room.
"Stop, Beth," he said. Beth paused, realizing it was the first time he used her name. She looked him up and down, taking in his blue eyes that held that hint of regret to the hand that grabbed her, and was now rubbing at his chin. He looked like he was ready to say something. Apologize or explain. Either way, Beth didn't want to hear it and she stepped out the door again. He moved to grab her arm a second time and stopped as she glanced at Blade. The man now stood with his arms crossed, staring at the both of them.
Turning toward Scud, her lips tightened into a thin line. "He knows. You know." Their eyes met for only a second before she was off again. She took in the sun shining through the windows, and headed toward the door. Didn't bother to say anything to Blade or look back at Scud. The man managed to piss her off faster than anyone she could recall in this instant and she didn't know if she wanted to talk to him any more.
Despite the slight irritation that the sun caused the moment she stepped out the door, and the way her head swayed after only walking a block from the warehouse, Beth was determined to head back to the apartment. To forget the man for a few hours and find some solace in the evening. Maybe she could disappear. Go off the grid. One of the things she missed about the apocalypse, the ability to just disappear for even a little while.
The walk to the apartment took even less time than she imagined, and she soon found herself staring up at the desolate red-bricked building with the horrifying realization that this was in fact Scud's place. Kicking herself, she turned away and started heading down the streets. Hoping to find somewhere else that she could head to for a few hours. She lost herself in the crowd of people. The whirling cars and mindless chatter on the streets a welcome background noise to the chaos that was ensuing in her head. She was able to drift off, to just wander until the pounding in her head grew to be too much and she looked around to find a coffee shop half a block down.
Heading in, she pulled out what few bucks was left over from Scud's loan -something else that irritated her to no end- and she handed it over to the cashier before happily taking her hot coffee to one of the tables in the back corner of the room. She watched the people walk by the window. Noticed the smiling woman stop long enough to adjust something in the babies stroller, her lips mouthing something to the small bundle inside. Beth's insides clenched as she thought about Judith, wondering about her fate for the hundredth time. She didn't want to think about the walkers tearing the sweet girl to bits, didn't want that image stuck in her head, but it came unbidden along with the tears that she thought she was done shedding for her...their... fate. They were content in that prison, almost happy even, and some greedy ass had to come screw it all up.
Looking around, realizing she was lost in a sea of strangers, Beth almost wished for the those high gates and cement walls. For the cell bars that gave them a sense of privacy- even though you could hear everything going on within those walls- and the dark twisting hallways that would have been frightful at the dead of night except for the knowledge that outside was much worse.
No, she would have traded any of these modern conveniences for her family any day. To hold Judith in her arms, to embrace her sister and father all over again. Hell, to hear Daryl snap at her again inside that moonshine cabin would have been a welcome relief. Her eyes focused on an elderly man with white hair, in a pair of overalls and the sight of her father's head being cut off by a katana flashed before her eyes as she clenched them closed. Willing the image away just as she opened them up to find two young girls holding on to each other. One was brown haired, the younger one blonde and Beth slammed her drink onto the table, clueless to the hot liquid that poured on to the shirt that looked like something Scud would have worn.
Cursing the man, she threw her drink away and headed home. Already the afternoon sun was rising high above the sky, and she knew that it'd been hours since she took off from Blade's warehouse. Unlocking the front doors, she stopped halfway in the door way when she took in Scud's slouched form. He sat on the couch, hunched over with his hands tangled in his hair like he'd done it a hundred times for god knows how long.
"What are you doing here?" she asked, making the man look up at her. A look of relief swept across his features as he stood up muttering, "thank god."
Two large steps brought him standing in front of her, but when he reached out Beth took a step back. Still angry with him for what happened last night. She could see the concern on his face. The hurt that appeared when she moved just out of his reach, but she couldn't find it in her to forgive him right now.
"What are you doing here?" she asked again, firmer this time as she tucked her hands in the front pockets and stood stiff. Ready for whatever excuse he was looking to give her.
"It's my place," he said, reminding her yet again that she owed him. That she would forever be in his debt. Beth licked her lips, her mouth suddenly going dry as she attempted to control the anger building inside.
She wanted to scream and kick. Call him things she never thought she would direct towards a human being. Instead she, swallowed the words and said, "get out."
"Beth," Scud said, stepping forward, his arms spreading out like he was ready to point out every reason she shouldn't be kicking him out of his own place.
"Just leave, Josh," she said, using his real name to get the point across. Scud froze. Eyes blinking several times as he gaped at her. After a few seconds, he closed his mouth and nodded his head.
"We're leaving tonight," he started, looking at the floor now.
"Good." Beth snapped, moving her own gaze to her feet as she kicked at some invisible force on the ground.
"Leavin the states to head over-seas."
"Even better."
Scud stared at her. Drilling a hole into the side of her head as he studied her every movement. Looking for something to say. Beth met his stare, making sure her's was as hard and unfeeling as she could imagine being at this moment. There was nothing unfeeling inside of her. She wanted to cry, scream, beg for an explanation as to why. Still she stood there, arms crossed, waiting him out.
The blue in his eyes turned dark, narrowing as they challenged each other, and again Beth felt that familiarity sweeping through her. Like she should know those eyes. Know them anywhere at any time. Scud looked away first, licking his lips as he picked out a piece of paper from his pocket and laid it on the coffee table.
"Guess I'll be in touch," he said, not bothering to look up again as he moved past her. Beth listened to his footsteps, waiting for the door to come close so that she could be alone with her thoughts. Alone forever, or so it felt like. When the footsteps stopped with no sound of the door closing, Beth cocked her head to the side. Barely able to see Scud's large frame as he hovered in the door.
"Didn't mean for any of this," he said, head still bowed as he peeked at her from the corner of his eye. "Just felt somethin. Don't know what, just...somethin. Thought what the hell, take a chance. But didn't mean for ya to get hurt though."
The door closed and Beth figured that was as close to an apology she was going to get. For now anyways.
Here's the final chapter.
For this week anyways.
I work weekends so updates are impossible then, but I promise there's more to this. I'm liking where this is going and am actually enjoying writing this out and hope you enjoy reading just as much. Thanks for the kind reviews and likes so far. They definitely help in keeping the motivation up. Until next week.
