"Queen Beryl!" yelled Jadeite. "I found a new source of energy!"

"Good," said Queen Beryl. "It is important that we get energy to awaken our great ruler. Once she is awakened-"

"Jadeite," called Kunzite. "It's time to go."

"Ah," said Jadeite. "Sorry Beryl, but I had plans today that I forgot about until now."

Jadeite started running away.

"WAAAIIIT!" said Beryl.

Jadeite and the other Shitennou froze.

Jadeite sighed. "What?"

Beryl was mad. "Where are you going?" she demanded.

"Where are we going?" asked Jed.

"Ah," said Nephrite. "It's the tenth annual Shitennou pie-eating contest. Kenji will be the judge."

"Ho ho ho," said Kenji. "Let's eat some pie."

"No," said Beryl. "No pie-eating contest."

"Sorry," said Zoisite. "But it's the tenth annual. You can't just stop after ten years. Jadeite needs to defend his title from the last two."

Beryl killed young Zoisite.

"His life was claimed," explained Beryl.

"No," said Kunzite. "It was taken. By you."

"Yes," said Beryl. "I had no choice. There was no other way."

"Alright," said Jadeite. "Zoisite's too skinny to eat pie anyway. He has to keep his figure. Usually he only gets through one pie and then says the contest is stupid when he's in last place."

The Shitennou went to leave, and hopped over Zoisite's corpse.

But suddenly the door slammed shut.

"You're not going anywhere!" screamed Beryl.

"How'd you do that?" said Jadeite.

"What, you don't think I'm powerful enough to shut a door?" demanded Beryl offended.

"Well," said Jadeite. "That's more of a mystic ability. You come off as more of a brute strength ability."

"She died to a rose," snickered Nephrite.

"Be quiet!" shouted Beryl, getting livid.

"More often than is reasonable," began Beryl. "Every time Jed's about to tell me a new source, you guys come in and have some very important activity that he just HAAAAS to participate in."

"Hmm," said Kunzite. "Hmmmm."

"Yes, well," said Beryl. "I've had enough of it! No one is leaving this throne room ever again!"

"Well that will be a problem," said Nephrite. "I live on Earth."

"Not anymore," said Beryl. "I just want to hear Jadeite's new sources of energy, but I end up getting my time wasted each time I ask."

"Yikes," said Jadeite. "Well that might be a problem, because I didn't actually have one. I was just hoping I'd get saved by the bell, and I did."

"That is unacceptable," said Beryl.

She put up a forcefield around the entire throne room, so that no one could escape.

"Oh no," said Nephrite sarcastically. "Wait, what's that over there?!"

Beryl turned her head foolishly, and Nephrite teleported away.

Or, he tried to, anyway.

Apparently Beryl's forcefield expanded through all dimensions, and Nephrite found himself leaping into a barrier and falling to the floor.

"NOooOOOO!" said Nephrite. "I need to get to Earth to get energy!" he lied.

"Wrong," said Beryl. "You're just going to go home and watch the new Cartoon Network hit series, Craig of the Creek."

"No," lied Neph. "How do you know that anyway?"

"Because," said Beryl. "I know it's airing tonight, and no one would miss it in the world. In fact, it will be the first cartoon ever where all 7 billion people on Earth watch."

"Hmmm," said Jadeite. "I don't think so. It looks like another subpar show, like the last ten Cartoon Network dished out."

"Yes," said Kunzite. "Cartoon Network's line-up is getting very mediocre. While I did in fact set it to record Craig of the Creek, I don't think I'll be watching it."

Jadeite suddenly leapt through a portal, but fell right down through the ceiling.

"Oof," he said, landing on the solid stone floor. "Can't we put a carpet or some sort of tiling in here?"

"Sorry," said Beryl. "But no one's leaving."

"No fair," said Nephrite. "How come Zoisite got to die and escape this suffering?"

"Good point," said Beryl. She channeled Metalia's energy and brought Zoisite back.

"Ah," said Kunzite. "Welcome back."

"Shoot," said Zoisite. "I'm back. I was watching from the afterlife, and I wanted no part of this."

"Can I leave?" asked Kenji.

"Yes," said Beryl. "I permit you to leave."

Kenji walked through the barrier like it was nothing and exited.

"Lucky man," said Jadeite. "Not being a Shitennou but still being a major part of our organization has its perks."

"Queen Beryl," said Zoisite. "May I be dismissed to watch Craig of the Creek?"

"No," said Beryl.

"Come on!" insisted Zoisite. "It's a pilot! We all know it's going to be a hit show!"

"I know," said Beryl. "But sadly it's time to pay."

"It's Jadeite's fault for being so easily pulled away," argued Zoisite. "He should just tell us that he doesn't want to come to our various activities until he finishes his one sentence on what his new source is."

"Get comfortable," said Beryl.

"I can't," said Nephrite. "There's no furniture."

He had no choice but to sit down on the ground.

"Not comfortable at all," he said. "How do you sit on that rocky throne all day? Like a caveman," he added, getting a little salty.

The others sat down on the cold stone floor too, forming a circle, or a square.

"Time to pass time," said Jed.

"It's too bad we don't have those pies in here," said Kunzite. "I practiced my speed eating for a week."

"We just have to wait for Beryl to let us go," said Nephrite. "It's like a detention, which young Mawwwly told me about."

"Nephrite," said Zoisite. "Human girls should not intermingle with Shitennou."

"Men should not intermingle with other men," retaliated Nephrite.

"Eeeeasy now," said Zoisite, not wanting to have to start crying, as he would if the exchange of words continued.

"Zoisite is too sensitive," said Kunzite.

"Kunzite, how could you?!" said Zoisite, starting to cry.

He tried to teleport away but got thrown into the wall.

He started weeping.

Kunzite sighed sadly. "If you're gonna pick fights, you should have the backbone to not end up crying."

Zoisite kept crying.

"D'ah," said Kunzite, walking over to the wall to comfort him.

Zoisite took his spot on Kunzite's lap.

"Hey," said Nephrite. "Save it for home."

"I wish," said Kunzite. "But sadly this is our lives now."

"This isn't much different from my regular home," shrugged Jed. "And now I have company."

"Beryl," said Nephrite. "Can you install a soda machine in your throne room?"

"No," said Beryl. "No enjoyment here. This is a place of misery."

"Sad," said Nephrite.

"So what do you do here all day anyway?" asked Jed.

"Shut up," said Beryl. "I'm not talking to you. Pretend I'm not here."

Beryl went back to rubbing her ball, and looking out into space.

"Strange woman," said Nephrite. "We'll really get to know her well now."

The Shitennou started twiddling their thumbs.

"Hey," said Zoisite. "Wanna play numbers?"

"What's that?" asked Kunzite.

"Ah, a very fun game," said Zoisite. "I used to play it in middle school."

Everyone gathered around.

"Alright," said Zoisite. "I'll show you an example with young Jadeite. Jadeite, put up your two index fingers."

Jadeite pointed at the sky.

"Nooo," said Zoisite. "Point them at me."

"Okay," said Jed, getting giddy.

"Alright," said Zoisite, doing the same. "Now I'm gonna tap your finger."

"Alright," said Jadeite. "Be gentle."

Zoisite tapped Jed's finger.

"Nice," said Jed. "I'm liking this already."

"Alright," said Zoisite. "Now the finger that I tapped becomes two fingers."

"I don't know how to grow fingers," said Jadeite sadly.

"No no," said Zoisite. "You just hold up two fingers now."

"Okay," said Jed. He held up his index and his pinkie finger.

"No," said Zoisite. "Hold up your middle finger."

"No," said Jadeite. "That's rude."

"Not when you have other fingers up," explained Zoisite.

Jadeite gave a peace sign. "Is this good?"

"Yes," said Zoisite. "But you have to keep pointing at me."

Kunzite wrote this down in his notepad.

"Alright," said Zoisite. "Now you can tap either of my hands with either of your hands. But if you tap me with your two fingers, that's worth two fingers on me. You lose if you get five on each hand."

"Ah," said Jadeite.

He tapped Zoisite with two fingers, and Zoisite grew three fingers.

He tapped Jed's two fingers, wiping that hand off the game.

"Ooooh!" said Jadeite. "This is getting wild!"

"Alright," said Zoisite.

He tapped Jed's finger with one of his fingers.

"Nice," said Jadeite.

"Alright, your turn," said Zoisite.

Jadeite looked over his options strategically. "Can I pass?" he asked finally.

"No," said Zoisite. "This is no RPG."

"Shoot," said Jadeite.

He tapped Zoisite's hand, wiping out his three fingers.

Zoisite tossed him a tap with his one remaining finger.

Jed tossed him a tap right back, giving Zoisite four fingers.

He split his four into two twos, two on each hand.

"Hey!" said Jadeite. "What is that?"

"Oh," said Zoisite. "I forgot to tell you. You can split your hand."

"Hey!" said Jadeite. "You didn't tell me that! I wouldn't have made many of my foolish mistakes if I had known!"

"Sorry," said Zoisite. "I forgot."

"What is this, Australian rules?!"

Jed tossed Zoisite a tap, and Zoisite tossed him one back.

The game continued for many hours, but Jed wasn't budging.

He mastered the game from only seeing it once, and he had two on one hand and one on the other hand.

"Alright," said Zoisite. "Your turn."

"Alright," said Jadeite. "I'm gonna pass."

"No," said Zoisite. "You can't do that."

"Alright," said Jed. "I'll just do a split then."

He broke his two and put one on the other hand, giving him a two and a one instead of a one and a two.

"Hey!" said Zoisite. "You can't do that!"

"Sorry," said Jed. "I just did."

"No," said Zoisite. "No passing! Your splits have to have purpose!"

"Sorry," said Jed. "But that's not for you to decide."

Jadeite was starting to get frustrated that Zoisite wasn't going down.

"Ok," said Jed. "I'm done."

"Hey," said Kunzite. "I wanna play!"

"Sorry," said Zoisite. "That went on too long. We're done playing that."

"Awwww," said Kunzite.

He tore up his notebook, and then blasted it to bits.

"What now?" asked Nephrite, waking up from his nap.

"Hmm," said Zoisite. "Let's play a word game."

"Ok, I have a word game for you," said Nephrite. "Mawwwwly taught it to me, it's a very common one in Japan."

"Let's stop talking about MAwwly," said Zoisite. "She is an Earth girl, and I might go kill her."

"Better not," said Nephrite. "Or I'll kill you."

"Better not," said Kunzite. "Or I'll kill you."

"Better not," said Jadeite. "Or I'll kill you."

"No you won't," said Kunzite. "You're a weakling. And so is Nephrite."

Nephrite thought of something to say but couldn't. He just growled.

"One day I'll get rid of you, Kunzite," he said.

"What is the game?" said Jadeite.

"Okay," said Nephrite. "It's called Shiritori."

"Shit-itori, what?" asked Jadeite.

"No," said Nephrite. "You just heard me say it."

"How do you play this Earth game?" said Zoisite.

"Well," said Nephrite. "Someone says a word, and then you say a word that starts with the last kana character of that word."

"Sorry," said Jadeite. "We can't play that."

"Why not?" asked Nephrite.

"I don't know Japanese," said Jadeite.

"Huh?" said Nephrite. "You're speaking it right now."

"Am I?" said Jadeite.

"Yes," said Nephrite.

"But am I?" considered Jadeite.

"Okay," said Kunzite. "Let's not play. It would be too complicated for someone to understand."

"Hmmm," said Jadeite. "Let's play the game where we figure out a way to get out of here. Maybe we can dig under the barrier."

"Have fun," said Zoisite. "But I don't get my hands dirty. I get other people to get dirty for me."

"Yes," said Nephrite. "And then I beat all three of them at once when their plan is only to attack me."

"I told them not to, and in fact exaggerated why they shouldn't by saying you were a superb fighter," said Zoisite. "Well, I guess it's true to them, but to everyone else you're not superb. Maybe average."

"You're a terrible soldier," said Nephrite. "I wouldn't even call you one. How you got where you are now is beyond me."

"Hmm," said Kunzite. "I wish the Shitennou just got along. It's bad enough being stuck in here, but hearing you two bicker is too much."

"Getting the Silver Crystal is my job," said Nephrite.

"No, not this again!" cried Zoisite. "I told you, it's my job! I asked Beryl if it was my job, and she said 'yes!'"

"Well that's odd," said Nephrite. "Because I asked her if it was my job, and she said, 'I just want the crystal.'"

"Hmm," said Jadeite. "At one point I was told it was my job. OR she just randomly asked me if I had it, which was very odd."

"Did that happen?" asked Nephrite.

"Yes," said Jadeite. "She also once sent a crowd of Youmas to go search the Earth for it, on episode two in fact. It's unknown if their search was successful, or what they did on their search. Did they disguise as humans, or did they just roam the streets at night? How would a Youma even go about finding it? Asking people as a human? It just doesn't add up. Why would Beryl bother sending them to go look? They're simple creatures, and need to be ordered with a direct command, not some vague, 'search the earth' nonsense."

"Be quiet," said Beryl.

"Seriously," continued Jed, ignoring her. "If Beryl told me to look for the Silver Crystal, I wouldn't know where to start."

"I'd know where to start," said Nephrite. "I'd build a crystal to find the crystal."

"And then I'd steal the crystal," said Zoisite.

"That'd be a foolish thing to do," said Nephrite. "As finding the Silver Crystal is my job!"

"Wrong!" screamed Zoisite. "Beryl, please, let me out! I can't handle this emotionally!"

"Hey," said a random Youma, as several shadowy figures walked up to Beryl's dome. "Is it time to gather around yet?"

"Hey!" said Kunzite. "Help us out of here!"

He started banging on the barrier.

"Sorry," said the Youma. "But that order is too vague."

They left.

"Damn!" said Kunzite. "Foolish Youmas. Very simple creatures. I'd kill them all if I could, for sport!"

"Hey," said Jadeite. "We should open up a Youma hunting ground. I'd pay good money for that."

"Do we have a currency?" said Nephrite.

"Yes," said Zoisite. "Negabucks."

"That sounds like a coffee place," said Jed.

"No, you're thinking of the Negacafe," said Zoisite.

"Yes, but Negabucks sounds like Starbucks, so-"

"No," said Zoisite. "It's a currency. Get it right."

He pulled out a Negabuck, and Beryl's face was on it.

"Cool," said Jed. "What's on the five dollar bill?"

"Metalia," said Zoisite.

"What's on the hundred dollar bill?" asked Nephrite.

"We don't have that," said Zoisite. "Negabucks function very different. We do have a 9999 Negabuck, and on it is Super Metalia."

"Neat," said Kunzite. "But I think there should be tens, twenties, and coins, with the Shitennou faces on them."

"No," said Jadeite. "The Negabucks have been set in stone long ago by Metalia. It's never gonna change, despite how odd it works."

"Once I had to buy a piece of property for ten thousand Negabucks," said Kunzite. "I needed 30 wheelbarrows because of the strange units."

"Wait," said Jadeite. "What form of Metalia is on the five dollar bill?"

"A hundred percent," said Kunzite. "From the Moon Kingdom raid."

"Ah," said Jadeite. "Good choice. She isn't in good shape now though."

"Yes," said Beryl. "Which is why I need energy."

"Too bad," said Jed. "Coming up with a new source is tough. I don't even know how there's different sources, you'd think it'd all be the same."

"I wish I got to get energy," said Zoisite. "I'd come up with some wacky things, and I'd be very efficient in my collecting, just like I was for the Rainbow Crystals. I just came in in my Shitennou costume to the middle of a restaurant, and attacked people. Those were the days."

"Well sadly," said Jed. "You can't just extract energy like you can extract crystals."

"Yes you can," said Nephrite. "I just took energy from Mawly once in like a second."

"Well," said Jadeite. "You can only take from one person at once. That's why you need to go in a disguise, to snag many targets."

"No," said Nephrite. "You just get one person at their peak. I got Molly and she wasn't even at her peak, and it was still more than you got from many people and in fact it awoke Metalia single-handedly."

"Wrong," said Jadeite. "You know nothing of energy."

"Getting the Silver Crystal is my job," said Zoisite.

"Still hung up about that, huh?" said Kunzite.

"Yes," said Zoisite. "It gets me mad that Nephrite thinks he can take my job."

"Too bad," said Nephrite. "Beryl's a simple creature. If I present her with the Silver Crystal, she doesn't care whose job it was. Only who got it in the end. It's like a race."

"If it was a race," said Zoisite. "You wouldn't be participating, and it would just be some bum coming up on a car in the middle of the race and pretending to participate, like a child playing a game tutorial and thinking they're actually playing. Even if you won, you'd just be ignored, because you were never in it to begin with! As it is not your job!"

"Shut up," said Nephrite. "You're wrong. And you look like a woman."

"Well, well, well!" said Zoisite. "So your true colors finally show!"

"I was thinking so too," said Jed. "But I just never said it."

"Hmm," said Kunzite. "Didn't they just put a woman's voice over you in the dub, and no one questioned it?"

"No!" said Zoisite. "The only true dub is Viz!"

"That's a fat lie," said Nephrite.

"I know," said Zoisite sadly. "I despise Viz. But the one good thing they did was keep my voice as a guy. But every other voice is terrible, especially Chibiusa's and Hotaru's! But I would not know, because I would never watch Viz. I've only heard rumors."

"Viz sucks," said Jed.

"AHAHAHAHAH!" laughed Beryl loudly.

"Uh… it's not that funny," said Jadeite. "What Viz has done with the licensing is actually a tragedy."

"AHAHAHAH!" laughed Beryl again.

"What's so funny?" demanded Kunzite.

That's when they spotted the reflection of Beryl's crystal ball, and it was none other than Cartoon Network's hit show, Craig of the Creek.

"Hey!" said Zoisite. "Is that on right now?! I need to watch that! Don't spoil it for me! Please!"

"Sorry," said Beryl. "But I'm not just gonna sit here, and not watch Craig of the Creek, when I can be watching Craig of the Creek."

"We gotta get out of here!" said Kunzite. "We have it on our DVR by now, but she's going to spoil it with the reflection! I can't help but look!"

Everyone else agreed.

They fired their best attacks, but the barrier wouldn't budge.

"How is this?" said Jadeite. "She died to a rose!"

"Yes," said Kunzite. "But she also killed Zoisite, one of the strongest fighters in the show."

"A crippled Zoisite," corrected Zoisite. "And I didn't even die until a while later."

"Hmm," said Kunzite. "She must be using raw energy."

"Hey!" said Jadeite. "Is that where all my energy's going?!"

"Yes," said Kunzite. "She uses her ball to charge up mighty attacks, far higher than her power level. There's no other way that she could shoot an attack that I didn't see, when she died to a rose."

"Yes," said Jadeite. "It's too bad she threw away all her energy reviving Chiba twice, so she had to come swinging with crystals and ended up dying to a rose."

"Shut up about dying to a rose!" yelled Beryl.

"Well," said Zoisite. "Beryl really put all her eggs into the Chiba basket, and used every last ounce of energy. It would have almost worked too, if that locket didn't have healing abilities stronger than the Moon Wand's as the Moon Wand didn't even phase Chiba in that form."

"Alright that's it," said Beryl. She stood up out of her throne.

"Zoisite's first," she said.

"Hey," said Zoisite. "Why is it always me?"

Zoisite died.

Jadeite fired lightning out of his palms, and Nephrite started chanting.

"AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!" screamed Beryl, putting up a forcefield.

Nephrite shot his best attack at Queen B, but she absorbed it in her ball, and threw it right back.

Kunzite ate it, despite it being Nephrite's strongest attack.

"We can't do a thing when she has that ball in her hands," said Nephrite.

"But how are we gonna get it out of her hands?" said Kunzite.

"We have to disarm Beryl," said Jadeite.

Suddenly Kenji sprinted in, and grabbed Beryl's ball and kept running.

"KENJIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!" he called on his way out.

"NO!" said Beryl.

She went to chase after him, but she looked at her feet to see Kenji left a trap.

She accidently stepped on a toaster handle, and it shot toast in her face.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" she screamed.

Kunzite destroyed Beryl finally and forever, and her barrier dropped.

"Nice," said Jed. "Let's quickly head home so we can watch the newest Craig of the Creek, as we won't be able to go on the internet until we watch it since of course it's all anyone will be talking about."