"Queen Beryl!" yelled Jadeite. "I found a new boy of energy!"
"Huh?!" said Beryl, in great shock. "Are you trying to disrespect me?"
"Yes," said Jadeite.
"No," said Beryl.
She readied her crystal ball.
But that's when Jadeite shot lightning out of his palms.
Beryl's ball absorbed it like a vacuum, but when the light dimmed Jadeite had vanished.
"RRRR!" screamed Beryl. "I'll get him next time!"
"Hey Beryl!" called Nephrite, running in. "Finding the Silver Crystal is now my job."
"Okay," said Beryl.
"Noooo!" said Zoisite. "I tried to run here but I wasn't fast enough! I should have known things would take that turn with Jadeite today! I stood in the crowd of Youmas many times waiting for this occasion, and then the one time I don't…"
"Haha," said Nephrite. "Well, finding the crystal is my job now. Beryl specifically said, 'Ok.'"
"No," said Zoisite. "Finding the Silver Crystal is MYYYY job."
"Wrong," said Nephrite. "First come first serve. It doesn't matter who gets it, but whoever does wins."
"That is the rule," said Beryl. "But the only winner is me, when Metalia ends you all."
"Hey," said Nephrite. "Then I'll just give it straight to Metalia then."
"Shoot, I said too much!" said Beryl.
Suddenly Kunzite flew in from the ceiling and threw a piledriver, instantly destroying Beryl.
The Shitennou were sitting in the lounge.
"Hello boys," said Jadeite, strolling in. "What are you all doing?"
"Ah," said Zoisite. "We're playing monopoly. We have a free spot, want to join?"
"Hey," said Kenji. "You can't throw me out of the game."
"Oh," said Zoisite. "I was gonna throw Nephrite out of the game."
"No," said Nephrite. "You just want to get me out cuz I'm winning."
"Wrong," said Zoisite. "The traps have been laid in place. If I roll a six it's all over!"
Zoisite rolled a six and won the game.
"Hey!" said Nephrite. "What happened?! What is this!?"
"I told you," said Zoisite. "The traps were laid out. I had them laid out since turn 1."
"What is this, Australian rules?!" demanded Nephrite.
"Ho ho ho," said Kenji. "This is quite the game of monopoly."
"Why is Kenji here in the Shitennou lounge room?" asked Jadeite. "I had to swipe my card to get in, so someone must have let him in."
"I climbed through the vents," scoffed Kenji.
"Anyway," said Jadeite. "I found this great new product! Winter White Cheddar Cheetos!"
"No way," said Nephrite. "Let me see that."
Jadeite presented his loot.
"Oooh!" the Shitennou all exclaimed.
Kenji just shook his head, as his heart belonged to toast.
"I'm on a strict all-toast diet," he explained, even though no one asked.
Jadeite opened the sack, and everyone dug in.
"Hey," said Nephrite. "What is this, some kind of joke?"
"What do you mean?" asked Zoisite, eating his Cheeto. "Hey," he said. "What is this, some kind of joke?"
"What do you mean?" said Jadeite. He ate his own Cheeto. "Hmmm," he said. "Something's off here."
"These are just regular cheese curls," said Kunzite. "Jadeite, have you played a prank on us?"
"No!" said Jadeite. "I bought this right from the store. Look at the package!"
They looked at the package.
"They must have mixed things up in the factory, and put regular Cheetos in instead," figured Zoisite.
"But they're white," said Jadeite. "Like white cheddar."
"This is no white cheddar," said Kunzite. "It tastes exactly like a regular Cheeto."
"There's only one way to determine this for sure," said Nephrite.
With that, they headed to the local Walmart.
They stormed in like a raid party, and the greeter quickly fled and dove behind a booth.
They raided the snack aisle, until there were no white Cheetos left.
"Hmm," said Kenji. "What is up with us raiding stores for white variants of products?"
"Just a coincidence," insisted Zoisite.
They returned to the Negalounge without paying.
"Alright, let's crack these bad boys open," said Nephrite.
"Hmmm," said Jadeite. "I really hope that the last bag was just a mistake. Surely Lay's would not do something so shameful and underhanded as just recoloring a product but not changing the flavor, and selling it as a new product."
"It can't be," said Nephrite. "It's a different kind of cheese. White cheddar is not just color-tinted cheddar."
They all sampled the bags, and were absolutely floored.
Nephrite grabbed a bag in his palm and lit it ablaze.
Kunzite threw one to the ground and threw a piledriver, followed by a grand slam. He finished it with a cyclone punch, and the bag's molecules were ripped to shreds.
Several Cheetos fell to the ground, and Jadeite started stomping them.
"Rubbish!" he said. "They're just regular!"
"There's only one way to 100% prove it," said Zoisite. "We have to do the blind taste test. Maybe there are slight variations in taste we are not noticing."
"Queen Beryl," said the Shitennou. "We need you for something important."
"Kunzite," said Beryl. "Why did I suddenly get destroyed earlier? There's no one in the Negaverse that can move that fast, besides you."
"Wrong," said Kunzite. "Your crystal ball's special attack/Zoisite finisher can. I didn't even see that until a second later."
"So you're implying my own ball shot me now?" asked Beryl.
"It's not impossible," said Kunzite. "It does have a mind of its own sometimes."
"Hmmm," said Beryl. "What do you want from me now?"
"Beryl, try these Cheetos," said Nephrite.
"What did you do to them?" asked Beryl.
"Nothing," said all four Shitennou at once.
But they looked very suspicious.
Beryl cautiously took one and ate it.
She chewed it slowly.
"Anything taste funny?" said Kunzite.
"So you did poison it!" yelled Beryl.
"No," said Kunzite. "But do you taste anything out of the ordinary? We thought we might have, so to settle the dispute we asked you."
Beryl examined another Cheeto.
"It tastes like a regular Cheeto," she scoffed. "You guys are crazy."
"Aha!" said Kunzite. "Well, I'll have you know that they are in fact 'white cheddar' Cheetos, that we died orange and put in a regular Cheetos bag!"
"Why would you do that?" said Beryl.
"We were just testing a hypothesis," said Zoisite. "And as it turns out, white cheddar is regular cheddar, in some bizarre world."
"Huh," said Beryl. "Odd. I had more faith in Lay's."
"We did too," explained Nephrite.
Back in the lounge, they paced back and forth trying to figure out what to do about this mess.
"We have to make 100% certain," said Jadeite. "That they are the same."
"We already did," said Zoisite.
"No," said Jadeite. "We need 100%. Let's try a true blind taste test."
Zoisite volunteered, and put a blindfold on.
"Alright," he said. "Give me a Cheeto."
They gave him a regular Cheeto.
"Hmm," said Zoisite. "Is that a white Cheeto?"
"We can't tell you," said Jadeite.
Next they handed him a white Cheeto.
"Hmm," he said. "Is that a regular Cheeto?"
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!" screamed Kunzite. "I knew it!"
"What happened?" asked Zoisite.
"Hang on now," said Nephrite. "Don't jump to any conclusions. A good experiment must be replicated."
They replicated the experiment several times, for each Shitennou, and got the same results.
"Lay's has gone too far," said Kunzite.
"I agree," said Nephrite. "What will we do?"
"There's only one thing we can do," said Jadeite. "It's time to storm Lay's, Inc. and see the process of how exactly they make their 'white cheddar' Cheetos, and compare it to their regular Cheetos."
The Negalounge ceiling vent flung open, and Kenji tumbled in holding pitchforks and torches.
"Did I hear something about a raid?" asked Kenji.
"Yes," said Zoisite. "But this time it's more of a storm. Put your battle gear away. We have to infiltrate them first, and then once we're 100 million percent certain, we'll go all out, and throw down, and destroy the Lay's factory!"
"Now you're speaking my language!" said Kenji. "I don't even care what the reason is, I just want to go on a raid."
"But Kenji," said Nephrite. "You're not even a good fighter. You're just a middle-aged man. Any spry young boy over the age of 15 or 16 could probably defeat you."
"Wrong," said Kenji. "I hold a heavy camera for 10 hours a day. I can throw a punch that can shatter a wall."
No one believed him, but they knew he was a good person to take on a raid, since he had no restraints and 0 morals. He had absolutely no filters, and the first thing that comes to his mind he does. He was chaotic.
"Welcome to your tour of the Lay's factory!" said the tour guide.
"I don't speak Engrish," said Jadeite.
"Come this way," said the man, leading the crew.
"Why didn't we tell him to take us to the white Cheetos," asked Zoisite, leaning over to Kunzite.
"Now, now," said Kunzite. "The impatient always lose. Except for Beryl, who unfortunately got impatient and ended you, and Jadeite."
"Shut up," said Zoisite. "Is this the time to bring that up?"
"She lost by ending me," said Jadeite. "The rest of the season was looking for Sailor Moon's identity, which I knew."
"No," said Zoisite. "My arc was about the crystals. You're thinking about Kunzite's arc."
"Focus, guys," said Nephrite. "We have to pay close attention to spot the white Cheeto making process."
"You're right," said Kunzite. "We have to lay low until then, and pretend to be regular tourists."
As the tour guide led them to the Lay's chips part of the factory, the raid party was a big one, in case blows had to be exchanged.
They brought everyone that wanted to come, and some that didn't want to come.
Mamoru Chiba (base) wanted to throw down and test the brute strength of his base form, despite protests that he should fight as Tuxedo Mask or Evil Prince Endymion.
The rest of the party consisted of: Jadeite, Nephrite, Zoisite, Kunzite, Kenji of course, Motoki, Melvin, Shingle, Grandpa, Diana the baby cat, and Taiki's forehead, who was disguised as a suitcase that Melvin was pulling.
"Ah, so this is how they make ridgey chips!" exclaimed Motoki. "There's so much to see here! How did you pay for the flight to get here, anyway?"
"Naïve one," said Kunzite.
"Stupid human," added Jadeite.
"Hey now," said Motoki. "Isn't that unnecessary?"
"We didn't bring you here to sightsee," whispered Jed.
The tour guide continued walking, so they hurried after him.
"This raid party is a pack of spaghetti legs and yellow bellies," scoffed Grandpa. "I don't know if I can trust you all to watch my back."
"Yeah, well," said Kunzite. "It was the best we could get at such short notice."
"Wow!" said Melvin, with stars in his glasses. "I can't wait to tell my internet friends that I went to the Lay's factory! They'll be so jealous!"
"Shut up, nerd!" said Nephrite.
"Come on now Maxfield," said Melvin. "You'll blow our cover."
"I'll blow you up," threatened Nephrite, his palm lighting on fire.
Melvin shrunk back in his place, and hid behind brute strength Motoki.
"Hey Chiba," said Kenji.
"Me?" asked Chiba, wondering why one of the Negaverse's greats would address him directly.
"No," said Kenji. "The other Chiba."
"Hey, calm down there, old timer," said Mamo. "You don't need to have an attitude."
"Well," said Kenji, getting down to the point. "I've seen you leaving my house once or twice in the middle of the night, through my daughter's window. Don't think I didn't know."
"Heh heh," said Chiba nervously. "I don't know what you're talking about. That could have been any shadowy figure. You must have mistaken me for someone else in the dark.
"No, I'd recognize your build anywhere," said Kenj. "Most boys your age are scrawny like blondie over there."
"Hey," said Motoki.
"But," said Kenji. "You have the build of someone who runs every day. I remember that time you ran by my house, and I told you to stay away from my daughter. But clearly you didn't listen."
"Well, what are ya gonna do, toast boy?" challenged Mamoru.
"Papa, look at that machine that puts flavoring on the chips!" called Shingo.
"Not now, son," said Kenji. "I'm teaching this boy some manners."
"Oh yeah?" asked Chiba. "Teach me then."
Kenji threw a punch, but Chiba caught it.
Chiba shook his head.
"Hey now," said the tour guide. "No roughhousing in the factory. Don't make me send you outside."
"Yes sir," said Chiba.
Kenji bowed. "Sorry pal."
As they continued on, they suddenly felt a chill down their spine, like a life was about to be taken.
It wasn't long after when the first victim fell to the Lay's factory.
"HEEEEEEEEEEEELP!" squeaked Diana.
They at first could not make out her words, as no little cat could project that loud.
They hurried over to where the squeaks were coming from, to see Diana running on a conveyer belt.
"Who did this to you?" demanded Kunzite. "Who lifted you up and put you on there?"
"HEEEEEEEELPPPP!" squealed Diana.
"Tell us!" said Kunzite. "Who!?"
"AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" squeaked Diana, sprinting as fast as she could.
That's when suddenly, a potato chip dropped on top of her, and she was pinned to the ground by the single potato chip.
"HEEEEEEELP!" she shrieked again. "IT'S TOO HEAVY!"
"No," said Jadeite. "Don't help her. She has to do this on her own. Otherwise she'll be the runt of the litter, and unable to get a place to drink her mother's milk."
Diana struggled for a long time against the weight of the single potato chip.
Finally, her fight or flight kicked in, and she tore through it with her brute force.
She started galloping like a horse, but the conveyer belt was moving at top speeds.
She looked behind her and gasped, to see potato discs getting crushed into ridgey chips.
Her adrenaline kicked in, and she picked up the pace, exceeding everyone's expectations.
Grandpa crossed his arms in amusement, and Motoki looked away in horror, not wanting to see how it ended.
Unfortunately for the little kitten, it was too hard to both run and jump over the oncoming chips, and she was sliced by the ridge cutter.
She died a painful and very slow death, as everyone looked away sadly and in fact headed on.
The tour guide pulled out his walkie-talkie.
"Incident at conveyer 5," he stated. "Another life claimed by the ridge cutter."
As the pack continued on, they started to tremble, not wanting to be the next to fall.
"It's me," said Melvin. "Isn't it?"
"Don't worry," said Motoki. "It could be anyone."
"I hope it's Shingle," said Kenji.
"I hope it's Zoisite," said Nephrite.
"I hope it's Nephrite," said Zoisite.
"You're both wrong," said Kunzite. "Only a human would be foolish enough to die to a Lay's factory."
"Didn't Jadeite die from a plane?" said Grandpa.
"No," said Jadeite. "Injured. And also the last one to die was a cat, not a human. Kunzite's wrong again."
Kunzite sneered, and they continued on their death march.
Everyone was on edge, when suddenly they heard Kunzite grunt.
His cape somehow got pulled into a contraption, and everyone gasped as he was being dragged into a death machine.
Zoisite started to cry. "Why did it have to be him!?"
Nephrite started to laugh, and Motoki screeched.
"Not another one!" yelped Motoki.
"It's a death factory!" howled Melvin.
Everyone started to panic, not wanting to be next.
However, Kunzite ripped his cape off, and in fact only about half of it had to be torn off.
"Fools," said Kunzite. "Only a complete buffoon would die to a Lay's factory."
Motoki let out a sigh of relief. "For a second I thought I was in some kind of horror anime."
"I'm not afraid of death," declared Mamoru Chiba. "If I was, I wouldn't have shown up in my base."
As they passed the cheesy chips, they then headed to the Doritos section.
"And here," began the tour guide, "Are where the Doritos get separated for the different flavors."
The Shitennou exchanged looks.
"Hmmm," said Jadeite quietly. "I'm starting to get the suspicion this guy's stalling."
"There's no way he knows what we came here for," said Zoisite.
"Hmmmmmmm," said Kenji, who somehow joined their inner circle. "Maybe he recognized that a party this big would not make their grand event visiting a Lay's factory. He must know we have some other motive, a raid perhaps."
"Well," said Kunzite. "There's probably other conspiracies about the Lay's factory. There's no way he can know we're here for the Cheetos."
The Shitennou broke their circle to not arouse suspicion.
"Umm, sir," Jadeite spoke up. "When are we gonna… uh… hit the Cheetos?"
The man's face turned grim. "We still have many places to hit," he said.
"Yeah, well," said Jadeite. "We're kind of tight on time, and we promised young Shingle over here he'd see the Cheetos, since it's his favorite snack your company produces."
"Hey," said Shingle. "My favorite snack is-"
Kenji gave him a sock.
"So," said Kunzite, picking up where Jadeite was going. "Can we go hit the Cheetos now?"
The man looked to his left and to his right. He had a strained expression.
"Are you sure?" said the man. "I have to warn you, we don't usually offer tours of that section."
"Why not?" demanded Zoisite.
"Yeah, tell us!" added Chiba.
The crowd started to get rowdy.
"Burn the place down!" said Grandpa.
"Let's contaminate all their food!" yelled Melvin.
"Let's kill Shingle!" yelled Kenji.
"Settled down," said the man. "I'll take you, but you're not going to like what you're about to see. Are you sure you want to go?"
They all nodded.
"Alright," said the man, like someone reading his own eulogy. "Right this way."
He led them through several doors that said, "Caution, do not enter!" and "Employees only!"
The Shitennou were starting to get giddy.
"I'm glad we're finally going to get to the bottom of this mystery," said Jadeite.
"Yes," said Chiba, who was already in position to throw down. "I have a feeling a fight's gonna break out soon."
Finally they made it to the door to the Cheetos section.
"This is your last chance," said the man. "Please, turn back! Once you go through, you can never unsee what you've seen!"
"Yeah, yeah," said Kunzite. "Let's get on with it."
He pushed the tour guide out of the way and entered the door. "We didn't come all this way to turn back."
Once they entered, everyone gasped. They saw the unmistakable sight of white Cheetos going down one conveyer belt path into bags, while some branched off of this conveyer belt, went under an orange dye machine, and then were put in different bags.
"IIIIIIIIIIIIIIII KNEW IT!" yelled Jadeite. "Quick Kenji, get the camera!"
"I'll post this on the internet!" yelled Melvin. "It's over for Lay's!"
"I'm sorry," said the tour guide. "But I cannot allow that."
All the doors slammed shut, and several men started to surround them.
Metal bars fell across the windows.
"Now that you've seen what happens here," said the tour guide. "We can't let you leave."
"Yes!" said Chiba. "I came here ready to throw down, and I was not disappointed!"
Kenji had appointed himself as the representative of the pack, and stood face to face with the tour guide.
"What do you mean?" he said, in an intimidating tone. "Do you intend on keeping us from leaving?"
The tour guide threw a wild punch, toppling Kenji, and that's when all hell broke loose.
Jadeite, Nephrite, and Kunzite all fired their best attacks, ending the tour guide, and creating a large explosion, knocking several of the guards that were flanking the man off their feet.
Kenji quickly tried to stumble to his feet, and finally made it.
But all he saw was a man charging a punch.
He tried to block it with his arms, but it was one mighty punch, and he got tossed right back down to the floor, and three men leapt on top of him and started throwing punches to every spot on his body.
"YOWEEEEE!" yelled Kenji.
Shingle ran and hid behind a box.
Melvin unleashed Taiki's forehead, and it flew up into the air.
Several beams of light shot out from how shiny it was, and it threw one mighty headbutt, sending two men crashing into a cheese machine and instantly dying before they even hit the ground.
Grandpa powered up, and took down a man with his fists. He used all the training he ever learned, and split into 15 afterimages, going full wild as he was not able to exhibit most of his strength in everyday circumstances.
He threw a roundhouse kick, and the receivant's head instantly exploded.
He then threw a punch into someone's chest, and their heart combusted and they dropped to the ground.
"I haven't had a chance to fight without holding back, ever since Zoisite!" said Grandpa. "This reminds me of my martial arts class, but I was heavily suppressed then."
Motoki took out all his inner rage on one unsuspecting man, and instantly killed him with a single wildpunch, like the one he tried to land on Zoisite.
Jadeite made a pose almost like a J. "Take a nap!" he yelled.
Several men dropped, but there were too many for him to send them all unconscious.
Four men threw themselves at Jadeite like projectiles.
The first three bounced off his skin, but the fourth projected himself at his legs, throwing Jadeite off his feet with the high-velocity throw of his body.
Once Jadeite hit the ground, he tried to get back up in a push-up, but 20 men piled on top of him.
He still pushed back and finally did his push-up, springing to his feet and sending the men flying.
He threw a hypersonic punch, instantly obliterating a man, and then shot lightning out of his palms, taking several more.
Nephrite started chanting, but a man socked him right in the face mid-chant.
Nephrite grabbed him by the arms and threw him into the ground, and finished his chant.
He threw a Starlight Attack, and several men tried to run, but were instantly killed.
He threw a scattershot, greatly injuring many men.
Kunzite fired a full-power beam, taking out 50 full men, but 50 more took their place.
They charged for Kunzite, but he put up a spinning forcefield, and they all dropped to the ground after touching it like a bug zapper.
He threw his forcefield, killing 5 men, and then trapped 20 in a bubble and shrunk it until they died.
"Hooha!" added Kunzite.
Kenji had regained his bearings, and was locked in an even fight with one man.
Kenji threw a punch, but the man caught it, and threw a punch with his other arm at the same instant.
Kenji caught it, and they locked arms.
Just when it looked like Kenji would be overwhelmed, Chiba ran in and threw a leaping kick, killing the man.
"I'm not gonna say thanks," said Kenji.
"Whatever," said Chiba, landing on his feet. "I just saw an opportunity and took it."
Ten men came charging their way, and Chiba punched one, tossing him to the ground.
He took another man's head and brought it to his knee, sending him to the floor.
A man thought he got the jump, and threw a punch at Mamoru from behind.
But Mamoru Chiba caught it, and grabbed his arm, throwing him over his shoulder into another man, sending them both unconscious.
Chiba let out a battle roar, and leapt high into the air. He came flying down with his foot, right into some man's forehead, instantly killing him.
Melvin was having a lot of trouble keeping up, but luckily people kept grabbing men as they flew at him.
Jadeite saved him about 20 times, but finally he had to face a foe of his own, and a man stood up against him.
Melvin threw 20 shrimp out of his bag, but the man threw several punches, destroying the shrimp right out of the air.
But it was simply a false trap, and Melvin threw one last shrimp right for the man's eye.
It was his lucky shrimp he kept in his pocket, and the man unexpectedly got hit, thinking he was out.
Melvin quickly took out his toy hammer, and threw an actual mallet punch right at the back of the man's head, sending the man to the ground.
Melvin threw punch after punch until the man was no more, as he was paralyzed from the shrimp that was spicy.
"I did it!" said Melvin. "I can't wait to update my status from men killed to 1 instead of 0!"
But that's when 5 men came flying at him from all sides, and Melvin thought it was over.
But suddenly T-head flew in, and killed all five of them in one headbutt.
"Thanks, T-head!" said Melvin.
Taiki's forehead nodded, and flew away.
A man found Shingo's hiding spot, and lifted the box over his head.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!" screamed Shingo.
He saw 5 men in goalie position behind the man holding the box.
Shingo knew it was all or nothing, and increased his speed stat to the max.
He quickly zipped under all their legs, faster than they could see.
Unfortunately, he ran into someone, and as he had 0 defense stats since they were all in his speed, he fell to the ground, clenching his head.
A man went to stomp him, but Grandpa came flying in knee-first, right into the man's neck, killing him.
He helped Shingle up.
"There you go, young one," he said.
"Shut up, old man," said Shingo. "You're just trying to make a move on me."
"Heh," said Grandpa. "You're not wrong."
Two men came running up to try to interrupt their conversation, but Grandpa quickly threw two slips like ninja stars, slicing them to pieces.
"Anyway," said Grandpa. "Be safe out there, young one."
He patted Shingle's head, and Shingo threw a punch.
Grandpa fled, and grabbed two men by the heads on the way out, throwing them into each other.
"Weird guy," said Shingle. "But better than my dad."
Motoki had a man on the ropes, and was exchanging blows with him evenly.
Every punch Motoki landed, the man was able to land one as well, of equal strength.
And every punch Motoki dodged or blocked, the man was able to do the same.
"You're not bad," admitted Motoki. "But I'm still the best!"
"Yeah right," scoffed the man. "Have at you!"
Suddenly, Motoki spotted a bright light out of the corner of his vision.
He turned and screamed, as a huge beam came flying his way.
It swept Motoki off his feet, and left the man he was fighting completely intact.
"NO!" thought Motoki, as he felt his life leaving him. "Why would Zoisite attack me when I'm on his side!? I'll never be able to tell the others of his betrayal, because…"
Motoki died.
"Shoot!" said Zoisite. "Some stranger hit Motoki with a beam!"
"Yeah right," said Nephrite, who was slicing a man into pieces with a sword. "Only you throw a beam that weak."
"Shut up!" said Zoisite, genuinely mad. He stomped his foot, and two men leapt at him, taking him to the ground.
"AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!" screamed Zoisite like a girl.
Kunzite came in and killed the two weak men.
"Come on, Zoisite," said Kunzite. "They're humans."
"Shut up," said Zoisite, standing back up and dusting himself off. "They caught me offguard," he muttered.
Nephrite threw an overhead mallet punch, killing a man, and socked another in the stomach, also killing him.
He charged up a beam in his hand, but before he could throw it, the next man booked it.
"Hey!" said Nephrite. "Coward!"
But as it turned out, all the men were booking it, like a tornado was after them.
Grandpa watched, confused, with a man under his foot. He dropped another man to the ground, and turned his head to see that all the men were running out one particular door.
"I guess they're retreating," shrugged Jadeite. "We won."
"That's a shame," said Chiba, who had worked up a sweat. He cracked a grin. "I was just getting serious."
"Yeah, you better run!" yelled Kenji, shaking his fist.
He adjusted his broken glasses, and secretly sighed a breath of relief, as the man had been about to defeat him before taking off.
"Well, team," said Kunzite. "I guess that ends this chapter. We were too much for a pack of humans to handle."
Suddenly they heard the loud clapping of footsteps, coming from the opposite direction the men had exited.
It echoed throughout the factory, and everyone turned to the source.
It was too foggy to see, and everyone got ready in their battle stances.
That's when a rough silhouette became visible, and the color drained from many of their faces.
"It can't be," thought Zoisite in pure horror.
Kunzite stuck out his arms in front of Zoisite, but he was trembling.
"Well, well, well," said a deep, booming voice, that could not be mistaken for anyone else.
He surfaced from the smoke, revealing none other than the great Chester Cheetah.
He adjusted his shades, and they glimmered with a sound effect.
Kunzite decided it was all or nothing and charged straight for him at the speed of light.
He readied a punch, but Chester merely grinned, and flicked his wrist.
An invisible force hit Kunzite like a wall, and suddenly he was launched off into the dark depths of the factory.
They didn't even hear him hit anything.
"You monster!" said Zoisite.
"Yeah!" said Chiba. "How dare you?!"
"I didn't know you cared about Kunzite, Chiba," said Nephrite.
"No," said Chiba. "Chester," he said, addressing the cheetah directly. "How dare you market white Cheetos as a separate product, when they are the same but just colored differently?!"
Everyone remained in their battle stances, not moving an inch. They would have moved if they could, but they were too frightened. It was like their feet were glued to the ground, and they were utterly frozen in place.
Chester's aura was frightening, and even the humans who couldn't sense it were shaking just from the feel of the atmosphere around them.
That's when Chester raised his hand very slowly and diligently, and then snapped his fingers.
There was an audible sound effect of a snap, and suddenly Melvin, who was standing near the back of the group, exploded.
Jadeite and Nephrite slowly turned around in horror, and everyone else did as well, their faces blue as the ocean.
They turned back to Chester with livid expressions, several clenching their teeth and balling their fists.
Chester grinned his signature cheesy grin.
"It ain't easy being cheesy," he said, in a very chilling tone.
He pointed at Shingo directly, and Shingo looked around, hoping he wasn't pointing at him.
Chester slowly raised his hand higher, and Shingle rose with it.
He started to flail and scream, and the rest just hung their heads sadly.
"CHESTER!" yelled Kenji. "You monster! DON'T!"
Chester closed his fist as Shingo flailed ten feet in the air, and then Shingo was no more.
"UUUWWWAAAAA!" cried Kenji. "You monster Cheeto!"
Chester laughed a hardy laugh. "Pop goes the weasel," he chuckled. "Now for the rest of you."
He took a step forward, and they braced themselves.
Jadeite and Nephrite, the best warriors remaining, slid close together, in mighty battle stances.
But before Chester could act, Kunzite flew in from the side and kicked Chester right in the neck, tossing him into a Cheeto machine.
"Kunzite!" yelled Zoisite.
"Quick!" said Kunzite. "We gotta get out of here!"
Kunzite grabbed Zoisite and tried to teleport, but something was disturbing his teleportation frequency, and they weren't able to teleport.
Jadeite tried to spawn a portal, but there was no portal to be had.
Nephrite leapt back but he just landed on the ground.
They heard rustling, and they all froze in their place, as Chester got to his feet out of the crumpled machine.
"I gotta admit," said Cheetah. "You got me off guard with that kick. But it won't happen again."
Chester Cheetah swung his hand, and a barrage of crunchy Cheetos came flying at the pack, all faster than bullets.
If any of the weaklings Chester eliminated quickly were still around, they would have surely got torn to shreds.
But luckily, everyone remaining were great fighters.
Mamoru Chiba dove for the ground, and Kenji screamed.
Kunzite put up a forcefield in front of him, shielding both Zoisite and Kenji.
Kunzite put his full effort in keeping his shield up and pushing the Cheetos back, as they were thrown with such power that they were quickly overwhelming him.
Just when Kunzite thought it was over, and Kenji and also Zoisite would have to take the dive, Jadeite shot lightning out of his palms, causing Chester to fall back.
Chester put up a single arm, tanking the lightning, and when he lowered his arm, he saw Nephrite flying right for him.
Nephrite landed a punch, and Chester stumbled a step back.
"Ha!" said Nephrite. "No one can take that without taking any damage!"
That's when Chester repositioned his head, and adjusted his glasses, revealing he in fact received no damage.
"Shoot!" said Nephrite.
He leapt back as Chester threw a cheesy punch, a single inch away from killing him.
Mamoru Chiba appeared behind the cheetah, getting him in a full nelson, and Kunzite ran up and started throwing punches on his exposed torso.
"Wow," said Chiba. "It's a sad day when I have to work together with you, Kunzite."
"Likewise," said Kunzite, throwing a punch into Chester's stomach.
Suddenly Chester whipped his tail, right into Mamoru Chiba's face, and he was taken to the ground.
Kunzite got in a street fighting position, but Chester easily overwhelmed him, and tossed him to the ground.
Zoisite suddenly unleashed a fire attack that he was charging the whole fight, and flames flew directly at a concentrated area on Chester's spine.
However, Chester quickly pulled out a giant Cheeto, and absorbed the fire, turning the Cheeto into a fiery hot Cheeto.
He then threw it like a spear, right into Zoisite, where it exploded in a fiery explosion, tossing Zoisite straight into a wall, and then he fell to the ground.
"Zoisite!" yelled Kunzite. "You're gonna pay for that, Chester!" he scowled.
He summoned the two Doomerangs, and threw them, but Chester easily evaded with his superior agility.
He threw his palm and an invisible wave was thrown, sending Kunzite flying.
The boomerangs flew out the window as there was no one to receive them.
Suddenly, Nephrite swung down with a sword, right for Cheetah's neck.
Chester pulled out a giant Cheeto, and blocked it, and they both pushed as hard as they could.
Nephrite remained flying in the air as he was quickly being pushed back.
Zoisite ran up from the other side with his own weapon of choice, the crystal, and swung down too, but Chester blocked that onslaught as well.
Zoisite's crystal lit up with divine energy, but Chester was pushing them both back at the same time.
Finally he threw one mighty push, sending Nephrite flying, and Zoisite skidding on the ground.
But during that split second, Grandpa appeared from behind, and landed a "Demon Begone!" strip right on Chester's head.
But Chester's fur was hot like fire, and the slip quickly burnt up before Chester's thoughts could even be sent into chaos.
Even though Grandpa was a superb martial artist, he was helpless to Chester Cheetah's might punch, and was sent flying.
Zoisite finally stood back up, or at least on his knees, and threw a crystal from behind.
But Chester heard it with his cat-like hearing, and shattered the crystal with his mind.
That's when he started riding a giant cheese curl, like the Winter White Cheddar Cheetos bag depicts, and he was zipping around like an expert snowboarder.
"Stop this crazed cat!" yelled Chiba, who had just now recovered from the tail whip.
Jadeite fired lightning, but sadly the being was too fast now that he was on a vehicle.
Zoisite threw a crystal, but it also missed.
Nephrite sent a scattershot Chester's way, but he easily swerved around each blast, and then zipped right past Nephrite.
There was a shockwave that flew into Nephrite's stomach with a second of delay, and Nephrite was tossed.
Jadeite saw Chester coming up from behind, or at least he thought he did, because Chester's movements were way too fast to see.
Jadeite dove at Chester like a football player, but the cheesy cheetah increased his speed and zipped right past him, and Jadeite fell to the ground.
Kenji and Chiba also leapt for the speedy feline, but on his cheese curl snowboard he was unstoppable.
Grandpa suddenly leapt in Chester's way, and started waving his fan, shooting repulsing energy.
But Chester plowed right through him like a bowling pin, sending the old man into the air, and tumbling to the ground.
Kunzite had focused for a long time with his eyes shut, and was finally able to track Chester's movements.
He raised his palm, and shot an invisible dark energy wave, destroying Chester's snowboard.
Chester skidded to a halt on his feet, and turned to Kunzite.
"Watch it, boy," warned Chester.
"Someone should call animal control on you, you mongrel cat," said Kunzite.
"Heh," snickered Chester.
Now that Chester was grounded, Jadeite, Nephrite, Kenji, and Grandpa came at Chester from all four sides.
"WE'vE GOT HIM NOW!" they called.
However they did not, and Chester somehow evaded them all, and they all landed hits on each other instead.
Luckily, Grandpa was able to pull back at the last second, and restrained from killing Kenji.
Chester was drifting backwards through the air confidently, when suddenly a rogue crystal brushed past his face, and he instantly stopped.
He felt his white furry cheek, and then looked at his hand to see orange blood.
He turned to Zoisite and growled.
"Ha!" said Zoisite confidently. "He's not invincible! We've harmed him!"
This only made Chester angry, and he threw a punch, and the sonic wave flew all the way to Zoisite, tossing him.
Grandpa leapt on the enraged cat's back, and started throwing punches at the back of his head.
Chester threw himself backwards into a wall, and Grandpa dropped to the ground.
But suddenly Jadeite kicked off the wall, and threw a flying uppercut right into Chester's jaw.
"ARRRGGGH!" yelled Chester.
He threw a punch, and Jadeite tried to catch it, but sadly he just got sent flying.
Suddenly a bubble appeared around Chester, by none other than Kunzite.
"Ha," panted Kunzite. "In my anti-magic bubble, you can't do anything! Now wait there quietly for your quick and painless death!"
The bubble started closing in, and black lightning sparks erupted throughout Chester, but he looked rather unfazed.
Right as the bubble was inches away from him, he threw his hand backwards, and his knuckles hit the wall of the bubble. The bubble instantly perished.
"No!" said Kunzite.
Chester leapt towards him, but suddenly vanished, only leaving an afterimage.
Kunzite in full panic mode looked around him.
"Behind you!" yelled Zoisite.
"Huh?" said Kunzite, spinning around.
All he met was Chester's foot, and he was sent flying for the tenth time that day.
Chester turned to Zoisite, and Zoisite threw himself to the ground.
Chester nodded and turned to someone else.
Mamoru Chiba base was ready to throw down like never before.
"HYAAA!" yelled Chiba, throwing a mighty punch.
Against all odds, it landed, and Chester was actually flustered.
Before Chester could think, Chiba kept up his assault, and threw punch after punch to Chester's stomach, as Chester took a step back after each punch.
Finally Chester regained his bearings, and grabbed Chiba by the neck, throwing him into the wall.
"I got my throwdown," said Chiba, losing consciousness.
"Idiot!" yelled Nephrite. "You should have transformed! You've doomed us all!"
But Nephrite wouldn't give up yet.
"Stars!" he called. "Tell me Chester Cheetah's weakness!"
"Wait," said the stars. "Are you telling me that white Cheetos are just the same as regular Cheetos? Even we didn't know that!"
"Worthless," said Nephrite, dismissing the stars.
Nephrite swung his sword right into Chester's neck, but the sword simply shattered.
Nephrite growled and leapt back.
Just then, someone Chester had not remembered was in the battle suddenly became a key combatant.
T-Head, short for Taiki's forehead, who was laying low the whole fight, finally emerged like a bullet, right for Chester.
"SHOOT!" yelled Chester, losing all composure.
Taiki's forehead threw a mighty headbutt, taking Chester right to the wall with as much force as the big bang.
Chester dropped to the ground, and T-head went to retract.
But suddenly his forehead was grabbed by Chester himself, before it could get out of range.
"I'm not finished with you yet," said Chester.
He stood back up, as T-head tried to buck away.
Chester swung T-head and released him after the swing, and it went flying into Kunzite, who was just about to finish charging his mighty attack.
They collided with each other at terminal velocity, and they were both taken out of the picture.
"AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" screamed Kunzite as he was sent flying out of the picture.
"Kunzaito-sama!" yelled Zoisite in dismay.
Chester took a step, but suddenly none other than Grandpa appeared directly behind him, throwing a kick to his neck.
Chester blocked it with his arm, and threw a punch with his other, tossing Grandpa.
Zoisite got ready to try another fire boy, but he turned to the loud familiar sound of a whip crack.
Kenji's belt was no longer holding up his pants, and was in fact in his hands.
He whipped it again through the air.
"Alright, make my day, Cheese Face!" he yelled at Chester.
Chester looked unfazed, and in fact gestured for Kenji to come attack.
Kenji was taken back for a second by Chester's confidence, but knew he had to fight.
He swung his belt, and it ripped through the air with a sonic boom.
Crack!
A direct hit!
Chester remained in place, however, and Kenji retrieved his belt and swung it again at double the strength.
Another direct hit!
This time, right into Chester's chops, knocking off his shades.
Chester growled with bloodlust.
"Oh yeah!" said Kenji. "There's more where that came from, you overgrown cat person!"
Kenji swung his whip one more time, but this time it didn't land.
In fact, it was in Chester's closed fist.
Kenji tried to yank it away, but Chester had a grip of steel.
Chester pulled it slightly, and the belt snapped, and the force tossed Kenji on his bottom.
"Maybe that day can be another day," said Kenji desperately.
Chester put back on his shades, and then flicked his fingers with so much force it tossed Kenji, who was ten feet away.
Grandpa surprisingly was in fact getting increasingly stronger, and charged right for Chester Cheetah.
He started sending a barrage of blows, and Chester put up both his arms in an X posture to block.
But Grandpa kept up the barrage, and threw blow after blow in waves.
Chester was fatigued from the long battle, but he was still keeping up relatively well.
Suddenly, Grandpa was open for a split millisecond, and Chester's shades glimmered to signify him spotting this.
He threw a punch, but this time Grandpa was the one to block.
He slid across the ground, but was still standing.
"Double acceleration!" yelled Grandpa.
He split into 20 copies of himself that were all afterimages, and they all leapt into the air.
Chester opened his fist revealing his palm, sending a flurry of Cheetos, each growing to the size of a person after leaving his hand.
They took out each and every afterimage, and the last one hit Grandpa, tossing him.
Nephrite suddenly flew in at incredible speeds and threw a supercharged sucker punch, however it never landed, as Chester caught it in his hand.
Nephrite scowled, and struggled against the mighty savannah cat.
But sadly his fist was in his paw, and it was staying there.
Chester slid back a couple feet from the impact of the punch, but he quickly came to a complete stop, and continued to hold Nephrite's hand as he floated in punch-landing position.
That's when, with his other hand, Chester threw a quick chop right into the joint on Nephrite's extended arm.
He finally released Nephrite's hand, and Nephrite let out a blood curdling howl, and passed out from pain.
However, Chester was panting, and the signs of battle weariness were starting to show.
Chester turned to see many of the discarded fighters getting back on their feet.
Jadeite flanked by Kunzite were already ready for another round, as was Kenji and Chiba.
He turned to see Nephrite getting back on his feet slowly.
Chester growled a low growl, and then leapt at Kunzite like a panther.
Kunzite gasped, and Jadeite threw himself at Chester.
But Chester's prime terrain was the air, and he swerved around Jadeite with ease and leapt on top of Kunzite, and started throwing claws.
Zoisite threw a weak punch at the beast, but it did nothing.
Kunzite kicked up with his two feet, sending Chester into the air.
Chester threw down two explosive Cheetos, and Kunzite quickly dove for cover, as where he was once laying exploded and was no more.
Chester landed on the ground and instantly threw a punch into Jadeite, who landed too.
Jadeite got sent flying, but he landed on his feet. Then he had to drop to his knee like Nephrite after almost getting hit by Mars's attack.
Chester looked at his fist.
"A punch like that should have knocked him out," Chester thought. "My punches are getting scattered and weak."
Chester didn't have much time to think, as Kenji leapt on his back and started throwing punches at his neck.
Chester grabbed Kenji and threw him over his shoulder onto the ground, and then threw a piledriver into his ribs.
Kenji let out a screech, and his ribs were no more.
That's when Chiba tackled the pussycat like a football player, but Chester easily disposed of the brawler and sent him flying.
Chester Cheetah opened up a bag of Cheetos and started munching them quickly to regain health.
But Kunzite wouldn't let this happen, and blasted Chester with his strongest attack.
There was an explosion, and when the smoke cleared, Chester was still standing.
The allied forces gathered up in front of Chester, and got ready for another round.
"You'll never defeat me!" yelled a frustrated mascot.
"Give it up, Chester Cheetah!" howled Jadeite. "We got you on the ropes!"
"Wrong," said Chester. "Soon enough I'll defeat you all!"
"That won't be necessary, brother," said a chilling voice.
Seconds after the sound waves, another figure appeared beside Chester.
This one had an aura 20 times stronger, and put Chester's to shame.
"Brother," said Chester. "Why are you here? I said I would handle this."
"Brother," said the mysterious figure, who had a similar build, but was still shrouded in the shadows of the factory. "You've proven to have too much trouble with these young pests."
"No, please," said Chester. "Brother. I'll defeat them soon enough!"
"Brother," said the figure. "You are too weak now to be useful to me anymore."
Chester tried to run, but he was instantly killed by an unseen force.
His corpse hit the ground with a thud, and was no more.
Everyone gasped.
"Farewell, brother," said the new opponent.
The powerful being stepped into the light.
"I don't believe it," said Mamoru Chiba. "It's-"
"Yes," said White Chester Cheetah. "It is me. White Chester. The representative of the Winter White Cheddar Cheeto."
"Why aren't you on the bag then?" challenged Nephrite.
"Shut up," said the white cheetah. "I cannot reveal my existence to the public."
Everyone got in their battle stances, but they were already fatigued from their previous fight.
"Wait," said Jadeite. "If you're White Chester, then how come you aren't exactly the same as regular Chester, as white Cheetos are in fact identical to regular Cheetos other than color?"
White Chester opened his mouth, but a thick beam flew into him, creating a giant explosion.
The beam belonged to Kunzite.
"Keep it up!" he said. "We can't give him a chance to attack! He is 20 times stronger exactly than his orange counterpart!"
Everyone who was capable of firing an energy attack, AKA just the Shitennou, all contributed to a powerful combined attack on White Chester's pressure point.
Jadeite shot bolt after bolt of lightning, and Nephrite coordinated his Starlight Attacks into a mighty unbeatable pattern. Kunzite spammed powerful energy balls, and occasionally threw a very strong one. Zoisite kept yelling "Zoi!" and firing dark energy waves. He shot three full powered fire attacks during the duration, and then a Motoki beam.
Grandpa waved his fan, shooting dark energy waves that rivalled Zoisite's, and Kenji threw several slices of toast like ninja stars. Mamoru Chiba threw a base form rose, but it was consumed by everyone else's attacks, and it never made it to its target.
T-head threw a headbutt into the air, sending a sonic wave straight for the albino behemoth.
After 20 straight minutes, they all got tired and ceased their fire.
"Did we get 'em?" asked Jadeite.
"Yes," said Kunzite. "It was 20 minutes. Surely we got him. If we did not get him, we should give up now as we have no chance of getting him."
But they didn't know the answer due to the cloud of smoke they had kicked up during their barrage.
Suddenly out of the smoke came a thin energy beam, straight into Zoisite's heart, instantly killing him.
Kunzite slowly turned his head in pure horror, several seconds after the attack, due to how fast and unexpected it was.
He watched Zoisite drop to the ground dead.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" he screamed.
"Ah," said a deep voice from inside the smoke cloud. "My aim is as good as ever."
When the smoke cleared, White Chester stood 100% unscathed, with his finger extended as it just delivered a beam.
Kunzite was furious at this turn of events, and grew a giant pink aura.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" he screamed, powering up. "You've disrespected me long enough, Cheetah! This goes too far!"
Kunzite charged with all he had, and ran up and threw a hypersonic punch faster than White Chester could keep up.
"No!" yelled White Chester, as he was tossed from the bloodlust multiplier.
Kunzite quickly followed up with a beam, that caught up to White Chester and created an explosion.
Kunzite started firing beam after beam, blast after blast, all while yelling, "AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! AAAAAAAAAHHHHHH! AAAAAHHHHHHHH! AAH! AH!"
"Wow," said Jadeite. "How does he breathe?"
This kept up for two straight hours, and finally Kunzite ran out of energy.
"I got him," said Kunzite.
"Good work," said Jed.
"That's my boy!" said Kenji.
But suddenly out from the smoke flew White Chester, completely unscathed yet again.
"Surprise!" said White Chester.
He threw a karate chop, killing Kunzite.
"AHHH!" yelled Jadeite.
"Good," said Chiba, nodding in approval. "Now my two enemies are gone."
However, because he spoke, he gained the attention of the powerful, unstoppable beast.
Chiba panicked, and threw a punch in his base form. Or, he tried to, anyway, as White Chester's Cheetos aura was like a hurricane, and Chiba couldn't get past it and was tossed to the ground.
"Come on!" said Kenji. "Just transform, buffoon!"
"Alright, alright!" said Chiba, as White Chester slowly approached him.
He pulled out a rose to do his rarely seen transformation.
But he was struck dead by a mighty Cheeto kick, as he was too slow on the trigger for transforming.
As White Chester was open, Nephrite fired his best attack.
"MULLYYYY!" he yelled, sending a spinning beam like the one at Yasha.
It was a direct hit, but it did nothing, and it just angered White Chester.
He appeared in front of Nephrite in an instant, and threw a mighty punch.
But Nephrite was an expert at battle, and White Chester's attacks were very linear.
Nephrite ducked under the punch, and most of the factory was destroyed by the shockwaves.
Nephrite threw an uppercut, and then a sucker punch, but it had no effect.
White Chester Cheetah growled, and Nephrite was tossed by his aura.
Jadeite, who was struggling to stand up in the midst of the hurricane-like aura, fired lightning out of his palms, but it had very little effect except making the furry creature's hair stand on end.
Kenji picked up a busted pipe, and charged the cat, leaping high into the air.
"YEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAH!" he yelled, coming in with an overhead pipe swing.
However, he was simply tossed back by the impenetrable aura.
"I say we book it," said Grandpa. "If bloodlust Kunzite couldn't leave a mark, we have no choice."
"Good idea," said Nephrite.
He fired a Starlight Attack, hoping White Chester would simply tank it like the cocky creature he is so it would create a cloud of smoke, however, White Chester Cheetah caught the Starlight Attack like it was an object, and threw it back at them at twice the strength.
"Shoot!" yelled Nephrite.
Him and Jadeite dove for cover, as there was a giant explosion from his own attack.
White Chester held up both his paws into the air like the messiah himself, and summoned a White Cheeto in each hand out of thin air, each as long as a meter stick.
He threw the right one and then the left one, and they flew at his opponents like discs.
He spawned two more and threw them as well, and then a fifth one just for good measures.
"AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!" screamed Nephrite.
Him and Jadeite did great leaps, dodging them by the slimmest of margins. But the explosions were so mighty that they still got scathed despite being several feet away from where they hit.
"This is it!" yelled Kenji, bracing himself for the afterworld. "I hope there's toast in the world beyond!"
But right when he thought he was finished, a small figure, the size of a child, appeared in front of him.
In his near-death delusion, Kenji called out a name. "Shingle?"
But it was Grandpa, and Grandpa held up his fan, creating a forcefield that barely kept the two humans alive.
However, they still sustained great injuries.
"Still kicking, eh?" said White Chester. "Well, no matter."
He spawned another white cheese curl in his hand.
But suddenly, an incredible power level surpassing his own flew right at him. He had time to realize this but not time to react.
It was none other than Taiki's forehead, who was now sporting a blazing aura that glowed with the light of a supernova.
"No!" yelled Nephrite. "Don't do it, T-head!"
Tears flowed down T-head's T-head, which could have been mistaken for beads of sweat down someone's forehead, as Taiki's forehead lacked facial features. But those who knew him well knew he was crying.
"He accepted his fate," said Jadeite calmly. "He already made up his mind."
"Sad," said Nephrite, starting to cry too.
"I always hate goodbyes," said Kenji, taking off his glasses and rubbing his eyes with his sleeve.
Grandpa just held his head down sadly.
"FOR KAKYUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!" yelled the forehead miraculously, despite having no mouth.
"NO!" yelled White Chester.
There was a booming explosion the size of the moon.
When the smoke cleared, White Chester was gone, and the Cheeto factory was just rubble.
The survivors arose from the ruins.
"It's over," said Jadeite.
That's when they heard a weak grunt.
"Errr…" groaned White Chester, getting to his feet.
"IMPOSSIBLE!" yelled Nephrite.
"What a beast!" yelled Grandpa.
White Chester was slightly scathed, but still kicking, and could easily defeat all of them at once.
"Let's get out of here!" yelled Jadeite.
His legs took off running before him, and his body quickly caught up.
But White Chester appeared in front of him.
"My luck always amazes me," said Jadeite, getting the luck of his life. "I guess it's to make up for what happened on Episode 13."
"Are those the words of someone who has accepted their death?" snickered White Chester cruelly.
"No," said Jadeite. "Quite the opposite."
He fired lightning out of his palms, and White Chester smirked.
However, the bolts flew right past him as they weren't aimed for him.
That's when White Chester realized they were not the regular bolts of lightning, and were in fact clear lightning.
He turned to see what they were aimed at, and it was an oncoming plane that just happened to be flying overhead.
Suddenly it did a nosedive, as it came at him like a kamikaze.
"Hey!" said White Chester.
That's when he exploded, and Jadeite leapt for cover.
"I wonder if he survived," said Kenji, who was oblivious.
"Of course he did, you idiot!" yelled Jadeite. "Let's flee while he's down!"
Before they could even make a move towards leaving, the broken plane was tossed into the air, and White Chester emerged.
"It's over," said Jadeite. "They would never have two planes fly so closely together. That's just not how the airports work."
However, Nephrite was smiling.
"Jadeite," he said in a serious tone. "You're a good kid."
"Thanks," said Jed. "But why are you saying this now?"
"Tell Beryl I don't like her very much," smirked Nephrite.
"What do you mean?" said Jadeite. "She'll only get mad at you."
That's when Nephrite spawned two swords, and charged right for White Chester.
"No!" cried Jadeite. "You fool!"
Grandpa quickly took the form of a cross-eyed lobster.
"Get on," said Grandpa, speaking words into Jadeite's mind.
"Wait, no!" said Jadeite. "We have to go with Nephrite!"
"You fool," said Kenji. "He is sacrificing himself for us to escape."
"That's an odd thing for Nephrite to do," said Jadeite. "Very OOC."
That's when Grandpa grabbed Jed with his big meaty ape paws, and placed him on Grandpa's back.
Kenji quickly leapt on, and Grandpa took off.
"NOOOO!" yelled Jadeite.
He turned around to see Nephrite getting disposed of, as Nephrite was only able to hold the cat off for one single second.
They watched White Chester fade off into the distance and darkness of night, as Grandpa was mighty fast.
"Wow," said Jadeite. "Too bad."
"Yes," agreed Kenji.
"I really can't believe Nephrite would sacrifice himself for me, Kenji, and Grandpa. What a world."
"Nephrite's really changed," said Kenji.
"Yes," said Jadeite. "But you'd think for anyone it would be for Molly. Not for us."
Kenji shrugged. "As long as I can eat my toast, I don't really care."
But that's when they saw a smoke cloud behind them.
"NOOO WAYYYY!" howled Jadeite into the moon.
Behind them was White Chester, running on all fours.
"WHY!?" cried Jadeite. "Why can't he just leave us be?!"
"We knew this coming in," said Kenji, putting his hand on Jadeite's shoulder.
"KEEP RUNNING, GRANDPA!" yelled Jadeite.
Grandpa picked up the pace, but Chester was a cheetah, the fastest of mammals.
Regular cheetahs can run 70 mph, and Chester was no exception. In fact, being a white cheetah, he was ftl (faster than light).
"This is it," thought Kenji. "And we were so close to escaping."
Jadeite shot lightning out of his palms in a futile effort, but it brushed off of White Chester's skin like a breeze of air.
"Sad," said Kenji. "Everyone's sacrifices will be in vain. Especially Diana's, who died before the conflict."
Suddenly, Grandpa skidded to a halt, and stood up on his hind, beastly legs.
"Hey!" said Jadeite. "What are you doing!? We could have at least kept trying!"
That's when Grandpa wrapped his big meaty hand around Jadeite, and his other around Kenji.
He threw them off into the distance, faster than the speed of light.
"AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" screamed Jadeite as he flew off into the distance.
Grandpa leapt at Chester and took him to the ground, but Chester made quick work out of him.
White Chester stood back up, and stared off into the direction Jadeite flew.
"What a mighty throw that beast had," said White Chester. "I will never find them again, as I am simply a cat."
White Chester accepted his victory, and remembered you can't have them all. But getting the majority is good.
"It ain't easy," said White Chester. "It ain't easy."
Jadeite and Kenji woke up two weeks later in a pond, on the other side of the world.
"What happened?" said Jadeite.
He turned to see Kenji making a makeshift toaster out of the sun and rocks.
He was using his glasses as some kind of magnifying glass to heat up bread.
"Hmm," said Kenji. "We don't want to overcook 'em now."
"Kenji," said Jadeite.
"Yes," said Kenji.
"Did we win?" said Jadeite.
"No," said Kenji. "We lost. But we made it out alive, and I get to eat toast. So I'm happy."
"You're a simple man," said Jed.
He looked up at the sun.
"Ouch," he said. He looked away because it was too bright.
"They all knew the possibility when they signed up for the raid," thought Jadeite to himself. "I did as well. So why waste pity on them?"
"Toast is the most!" sung Kenji.
"You know," said Jadeite. "Out of everyone in the initial raid party, there were quite a few I would have preferred to survive instead of you."
"Same, buddy," said Kenji. "And I'm not talking about Shingle."
"Huh," said Jadeite, eating a slice of raw bread from one of Kenji's loaves. "So I guess white Cheetos were regular Cheetos after all."
