"Queen Metalia!" yelled Jadeite. "I found a new source of energy!"

Suddenly there was an explosion, coming from Beryl's throne room.

"No!" said Jadeite. "The one day I report to Metalia instead, I miss all the action!"

Jadeite dashed into the throne room, to see some kind of jamboree.

But not a fun one.

Nephrite was squaring off against none other than Kenji in a mecha suit, Grandpa, Melvin, Motoki's sister, Diana, T-head, and Shingle. And even Motoki.

"Haha!" yelled Kenji, killing his own ally, Shingle.

Zoisite was trapped under Beryl's throne, with approximately 10 tons draining his life force.

"HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLPPP!" yelled Zoisite. "KUNZITE, WHERE ARE YOU?!"

"He's gone," said Nephrite, amidst battle. "Finished."

"What do you mean, finished?!" cried Zoisite. "What happened?! Get this throne off of me! Someone! Why?! How'd I get here?! Where am I!?

"Sadly you cannot be helped," explained Jadeite, a passive observer. "The throne is attached to the ceiling, and cannot be moved. I don't know how you got under there."

"Hey Jed," called Nephrite. "Wanna help me in battle here?"

"Against those humans?" scoffed Jadeite. "Pathetic."

"RRR!" said Nephrite. "That's easy for you to say, when you're not getting headbutted by Taiki's forehead."

While Nephrite was distracted, Melvin came up from behind, squeaky hammer equipped.

Nephrite threw a punch into his stomach, and he was no more.

Finished.

Gone.

Erased from this world.

Goodbye.

"Hmmm," said Jadeite.

He pulled out a trash bag and dumped it on the ground.

"Somehow this feels right," he noted.

Kenji flew over him in a mecha suit, and Jadeite grabbed his foot and spiked him to the ground.

"Hoo ha!" commented Jadeite, leaving the battlefield.

"Hey!" said Kenji. "No fair!"

Kenji tried to reignite his toast-powered jetpack, but suddenly Nephrite ran up and threw a spinning kick.

"OOOOH!" yelled Kenji, getting tossed back. "Now you've done it!"

He shot toast out of a toaster blaster like a machine gun, but Nephrite leapt out of the way.

However the toast trail followed him.

Suddenly Taiki threw a headbutt from Nephrite's blind spot, and Nephrite was pelted with 300 mph toast.

Luckily he was a strong man, and ate the toast, figuratively and literally.

"Toast is bad," commented Nephrite. "It needs butter. Who just eats plain toast?"

That's when Kenji was bloodlusted.

However his bloodlust didn't amount to much.

He replaced his mechahand with a giant 10 foot sword, and charged at lightning speed.

But Nephrite stood his ground.

He dodged many sword slashes, while the rest of the humans spectated, because they didn't see a place to intervene. For some of them, the battle was too fast, and they couldn't even see the movement.

"Nephrite's open!" yelled Motoki's sister. "Motoki, get 'em!"

"Me?!" said Motoki. "I'm not jumping in there with that sword flying around like a mosquito, but a really strong one!"

"Onii-chan!" complained Motoki's sister. "I guess I have to get the job done."

"Motoki's sister!" cried Motoki. "NOO!"

Motoki's sister threw her body as her only move, and somehow she came out perfectly unscathed.

But her clothes were destroyed, and their scraps dropped to the ground.

Gamer Joe walked in, late for the battle, in some kind of World of Warcraft cosplay.

"Hot dog!" he said. "Must be my lucky day!"

"NOOOOOO!" yelled Motoki's sister. "Don't look!"

Joe kept looking, and Motoki couldn't seem to peal his eyes away.

So Motoki's sister tragically had to write her own ending.

Grandpa had been meditating to gain an upper-hand on his opponent, but sadly his ten hours of building up power was lost at the sight of a nude girl.

"Too bad that young one perished," said Grandpa. "She was a looker! MmmmmMMMM!"

Grandpa licked his lips, but that was the last lick he ever did, as Motoki threw a punch right into his gut.

"HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" wheezed the old-timer, dropping dead.

"This is for my sister!" yelled Motoki, charging into battle fist-first.

Nephrite snapped his neck off with a kick, and he perished shortly after.

"This is your final chapter!" yelled Kenji. "Sadly it won't end on a positive note, not even a cliffhanger!"

"No, YOUUUUUU!" said Nephrite.

Suddenly Taiki's forehead did a U-turn and came back in for another round.

But Nephrite saw this coming three Taiki's forehead lengths away, which is equivalent to a mile, through the corner of his eye.

He leapt out of the way, and Taiki's forehead was pulverized, completely sliced to pieces on Kenji's sword.

"T-HHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAD!" wept Kenj. "He was the only man that could compete with toast."

"Put away the diddly darn sword!" yelled Diana. "You're slaughtering our allies!"

"Fine," said Kenji.

He sheathed his sword.

Gamer Joe suddenly flung a piece of metal at Nephrite, like some sort of ninja star.

Nephrite smacked it away.

"Joseph," he said, with a frown. "You should not have come to this battle."

Joe tried to run, and Nephrite let him.

"Goodbye, Joey," said Nephrite, letting the boy live another day.

Kenji pounced high in the air with his spring boots, and came down with a mighty vertical karate chop.

But Nephrite used his arm to block it, and spawned a sword of his own.

With one swift swipe of his sword, Nephrite sliced Kenji's mecha suit straight down the middle.

"NOOOOO!" yelled base Kenji. "There was toast in that suit! You're gonna pay, boy!"

"No," said Nephrite. "You will pay, but with your life."

"Can I pay with Shingle's life?" asked Kenji.

Nephrite shook his head sadly.

Kenji nodded. "Yeah, it wasn't worth much."

Kenji wiped off his glasses, and put them back on.

"Alright, Nephster. Enough of your fancy powers. Let's settle this, mano y mano. Fist to cuffs."

"Okay," shrugged Nephrite. "Let's see what you've-"

"CATCH THESE HANDS!" yelled Kenji, unleashing a flurry of hands.

But Nephrite caught them all, and they were locked in a handshake until Nephrite released his opponent.

Kenji took off his belt.

"Comin' atcha!" he yelled, charging with his belt.

Nephrite sidestepped, and the belt slammed into the Negafloor, shattering it.

Nephrite threw several blows, several chops, somewhat of a beat. Many strikes. Many jabs.

And finally, Kenji was no more.

None left.

Nothing else.

A gone being.

A being deceased.

"Easy," said Nephrite. "Was that everyone?"

That's when he heard a high squeak.

"KYYYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!" yelled Diana, going for Nephrite's vitals.

"Fall back, kitten," commanded Nephrite. "I do not need to collapse the bridge you have built in this world."

"NYOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" yelled Diana.

She climbed up Nephrite's leg, going for his face, and he sighed.

He pried the kitten off of him.

She tried to escape his fist, but she didn't have claws yet to claw him.

She tried to nip him with her lil teeth, but they were too little. She was just too tiny.

Too smol.

"You had a short life," said Nephrite. "It's sad that it is over."

Nephrite threw Diana like a pitcher would throw a baseball.

She was dead long before she hit the ground, from the speed of the throw.

Suddenly Haruna sprinted in with a machine gun.

"CHACHACHACHACHACHACHA!" she shouted, as her machine gun fired bullet after bullet.

"OOF!" yelled Nephrite. "I shouldn't have dropped my power level to zero after killing the kitten!"

Nephrite took 50 bullets, and then died.

Haruna wiped the sweat off her brow.

"It's over," she said. "Now let me help you, young man."

"Me?!" cried Zoisite, within inches of the great beyond. "Why thank you, young one! Very kind woman. Heeeeeelp!"

Haruna walked over and examined the situation.

"Hmmmm," she said. "I guess I have no choice but to lift this thing. Like a mother lifting a car off her baby."

"Make sure to lift with your back," said Zoisite.

"HURRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!" yelled Haruna. "OOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

"WOAH!" said Zoisite. "You're lifting it!"

Suddenly Haruna's spine snapped like a twig, and she was sent into a whirlwind of pain.

Zoisite tried to slip out, but suddenly the throne dropped.

"OOOOOOOOOHHH!" yelled Zoisite, dying.

Ms. Haruna was in pure agony for 50 minutes.

She still had her machine gun, so she could have ended things, but she couldn't move to reach it.

"RRRRRRR!" she yelled, staring to crawl despite the whirlwind of pain spiraling around her.

She crawled all the way from the North Pole to a hospital in Tokyo, despite passing many other hospitals on her treacherous journey.

"Wow," said the doctor. "Most people would have given up, and went to the great beyond. It sure would have been easier than crawling while engulfed in a hurricane of torment."

"It was my personal resolve," explained Haruna casually.

"Whelp, that'll do it," said the doc, supergluing her spine back together.

Haruna stood up and stretched. "The operation was a success," she explained.

That's when Queen Beryl threw a punch to her stomach, and quickly fled the scene.

"HOOOOOOORRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRUUUUUUUUUUUUU!" yelled Haruna.

She was fine, after a few minutes.