"Queen Beryl!" yelled Jadeite. "I found a new source of-"

"Trick-or-treat," said Beryl.

Jadeite narrowed his eyes.

Instead of a ball, Beryl was sitting with a bucket of treats.

"Happy Halloween!" said Beryl.

Jadeite narrowed his eyes some more.

"Queen Beryl," he repeated. "I found a new source of energy."

"No," said Beryl. "What you should find is a new source of spooks!"

"Okay," said Jadeite. "It looks like it's one of those days, so I'm going back to sleep."

"Wait," said Beryl. "Don't you want some candy?"

"I'm listening," said Jadeite.

"Alright," said Beryl. "Only take one."

Jadeite took two.

Beryl narrowed his eyes.

"Jadeite," she said. "Those were full packs of M&M's. Not the snack size ones."

"Fine," said Jadeite, putting one back.

"Thank you," said Beryl. "I buy expensive candy hoping people will be respectful. But they tend not to be, and I have to kill them."

"Yikes," said Jadeite.

"Say," said Beryl. "Do you like my Halloween decorations?"

"Yes," said Jadeite. "But they're not necessary. The Dark Kingdom is spooky enough."

"I suppose," said Beryl. "Now it looks more silly than scary. Take a couple pumpkins with you on the way out."

"Nice costume," said Jadeite, leaving without any pumpkins.

Beryl was wearing a witch hat. "Hmm," she said. "Everyone keeps saying nice costume. But I think they're being sarcastic, because I'm too old to be dressing up in a costume. They have some odd impression that Halloween is a kiddy holiday, but they are wrong. Foolish fools."

Queen Beryl got up and left to begin her route with her friend Prof. Tomoe. They weren't taking Wiseman this year, because he refused to wear a white cloak like a ghost rather than blue, so he had to be excluded. It was just too good of an opportunity, and they were mad he didn't take it.


Jadeite appeared at Kunzite's house at 1 PM.

Jadeite was dressed as an almond head, with green face paint and some kind of spacesuit.

Kunzite opened the door.

"Ah," he said. "You're late."

Jadeite pranced in.

Nephrite and Zoisite were already there, as Zoisite lives there, and Nephrite had slept the night outside to make sure they weren't delayed in beginning trick-or-treating.

"1 PM," noted Jadeite, looking at his watch. "You guys are right for starting now. We all know what happened last year, with that sick, disturbing 8 PM curfew."

"Hey," said Nephrite. "Aliens don't have a watch. Or at least not one with Earth numerals."

"Shut up," said Jadeite.

"Why would an alien have a spacesuit?" said Zoisite.

"Because it came from space, obviously," said Jadeite. "Why is Nephrite dressed as Donkey Kong?"

"Because," said Nephrite. "There were no Diddy Kong costumes on such a short notice."

"That's why you don't put off your costume," said Kunzite, arrogantly. "I got this Android 13 costume back in July."

"Fitting," said Nephrite. "You even sound like him."

"You think so?" said Kunzite. "I don't really hear it."

"And who are you supposed to be?" asked Jadeite to Zoisite. "Some kind of clown?"

"You could say so," said Zoisite, who was dressed as Motoki.

"Are you planning on flying in a beam tonight?" asked Kunzite.

"Yes," said Zoisite. "Why else would I dress like this?"

"Where's Kenji?" said Jadeite. "We need to get a move on."

"Sadly," said Zoisite. "He said he has to take his shitter son, so he could not make it. So we brought Melvin as a replacement."

"Hidy ho!" said Melvin. "I am Yuuta, in his Dark Flame Master costume. From Chuunibyou demo Koi ga Shitai!"

"Melvin," said Kunzite. "Why would you be some obscure anime character? No one will know who it is, and people will keep asking you. And then they'll still not know who it is."

"Hey," said Nephrite. "No one knows your obscure character either. Whereas I'm a videogame icon, who could be recognized by anyone."

"Well," said Melvin. "Us in the otaku community already have costumes that we wear to Comic Con. So Halloween's a field day for us."

"I hate this nerd," said Nephrite. "I wish Kenji was here. Or especially Mully. But she said she couldn't come, because her mom was making her hand out gems to the neighborhood kids who came by."

"Wait, huh?" said Zoisite. "Let's swing by there, for sure. And even a second time. If they don't recognize us. Nephrite, you should have come as something more inconspicuous. Everyone will remember Donkey Kong. And Jadeite's homemade spaceman costume is pretty recognizable too."

"You don't even look like you're in a costume," said Nephrite. "You just look like a man in a white shirt. People will remember you as the guy who tried to rook some candy without a costume."

"Like you, that one year," recalled Zoisite, referencing the time Nephrite dressed as young Maxfield Stanton.

"It's one o'clock," said Melvin. "It's do or die now, so are we going? If we don't leave this second, all the candy will be gone."

"Right," said Kunzite. "Let's hurry!"

They teleported to Earth, and Melvin almost died from his body rapidly dissembling and reassembling.

"Woooooah!" said Melvin. "What a ride! Like a roller coaster, with no rails!"

"Settle down," said Nephrite.

The sun just reached its position 90 degrees in the center of the sky.

"Disgusting," said Kunzite. "I remember when we used to go trick-or-treating at night," he said, with no choice but to put sunglasses on to darken the glowing bulb above him. "But now Halloween's all about going early, like Black Friday. Give it a few years, and trick-or-treating will be pushed back to October 30th. This is what happens when humans meddle in things that aren't their business, and get too rowdy."

Melvin was shading his eyes with his hand. "Let's just hurry up and get some candy, before they start closing down shop."

They passed by a few little kids who were also late to the trick-or-treating game.

"What a shame," said Zoisite. "What has this world become? Trick-or-treating at high noon. Back in my day, we just started at 8 o'clock. It's truly a sad world."

They knocked on their first door.

"Trick-or-treat!" they howled like banshees.

"Ah!" said a woman.

She reached in her knapsack, and got ready to put a candy in young Jed's hand.

But then she retracted her hand, like she had touched acid.

"Heeeeeeeeey!" she said.

"What's the hold up?" demanded Zoisite. "Having second thoughts about giving away that Whopper triplet? Planning on eating it yourself?"

"What?" said Jadeite. "Are we here too late? Have they made 1 PM the cutoff?"

"Men," said the woman. "You are too old for this."

"That's an opinion," said Nephrite.

"No," said the woman. "It's the law."

"Yeah right," scoffed Kunzite. "The humans are not that foolish. Now hand over your sugary goods."

"NOOOO!" said the woman, getting intimidated. "This is why this can't be! 12 years old is the cutoff! If you're one year, or one minute older than 12, then you're done for. And if you're a tall young one, then RIP. No trick-or-treating ever."

"Darnit!" said Jadeite. "What is this?! Who made this?! Why is there also an age restriction too? There's more restrictions on this than a Pokemon OU battle. First no sleep clause, then no double team clause, and now an age restriction. See how things spiral out of control? This is what happens when we give people too much power! City council's gonna pay!"

"Nooooooo," she said.

She shut the door.

"I'm only 14!" called Melvin.

"Too old!" she yelled, cowering behind the door from the overage hoodlums.

"Darnit," repeated Jadeite. "When we used to go trick-or-treating in the night, it was hard to guess our age. But now that we're out in broad daylight…"

"This makes me sick!" yelled Nephrite.

"There's always a bad egg," said Kunzite. "Let's just go to the next house. No one cares about that stupid rule."

But sadly, they knew that line was the beginning of the end.

At the next house, the man asked how old they were.

"12," said Zoiboy.

"I'll be honest," said Kunzite, a good foot taller than the man. "I'm 12 and a half."

"I'm 7," said Melvin.

"Me and this spaceman over here are 12," said Nephrite.

"Negatory," said Jadeite. "My alien race reaches adulthood at age one."

"Stop making backstories for your Halloween costume," said Zoisite.

"Hmmmmm," said the man, examining them for a long time. "I'll need to see some ID."

"Huh?!" said Kunzite. "We're 12! We don't have ID!"

"Then you don't have candy," retorted the man, closing the door.

"What is this?!" said Jadeite. "Is this some kind of parallel universe, where nothing is right? And people talk trash to us, and get away with it?"

"Apparently so," said Nephrite. "This cannot be my world. And if so, it's not a world I wanna live in."

As they were standing there, flabbergasted, a couple of young girls knocked on the door.

"ID?" asked the man.

The six-year-olds took out their ID's.

The man held them up to the light.

"HEY!" he yelled. "Fake ID!?"

"No!" cried one of the girls.

The man threw a dropkick, killing the girl.

"Let her fate be a warning to all of you, if you try to come for candy without an ID! 12 or under, with proof!"

The man slammed the door.

"Unbelievable," said Kunzite. "He just killed a girl. He's upholding the law in one category, but completely disregarding it in another!"

A woman walked up to the door.

"Lady," warned Nephrite.

But then he saw the woman was holding a baby.

"Trick-or-treat!" she said on behalf of the baby.

"How old is your baby?" demanded the man. "Is he under 12?"

"Yes," said the woman. "He is under 12 months, if that's what you mean."

The man narrowed his eyes. "ID?"

"For my baby?" asked the woman.

"Sorry," said the man. "No ID, no candy."

He went to close the door, but Nephrite put his foot in it.

"Dude," he said. "That is a baby. A baby cannot be 12."

"Sorry," said the man. "Without laws, people would go around killing each other."

"Hey!" said Jadeite. "You killed that young girl, two minutes ago!"

"It was to set an example," said the man.

"No example!" said Melvin. "There was no warning!"

"Yes there was," said the man. "Everyone knows, no ID no candy. Her warning was written in the legal code."

"Maybe so," said Melvin. "But that's no excuse to kill someone."

"Sorry," said the man. "No ID no candy."

"No candy no life?" asked Nephrite.

"Are you threatening me?" said the man.

"Yes," said Zoisite. "No one treats the Great Four like this! And Melvin!"

That's when the man threw a leaping kick at Melvin, and Kunzite snapped his neck.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!" he screamed as he died.

He died.

"Yeeeeeeah!" said the lady. "GOTTEM!"

She walked away, and the Shitennou ransacked the whole box of candy, dividing it equally by using the lone divider method.

Kunzite was the divider, and they all waited patiently.

Then they cast their votes on which ones they wanted.

However, Nephrite and Zoisite wanted the same pile, and soon a fight broke out.

"Guys, guys," said Jadeite. "All we have to do is just combine the two piles of candy, and then just do the divider chooser method."

"Very well," said Nephrite. "But I'll be the chooser."

"I don't think so," said Zoisite.

He held out his fist.

"What is this?" said Nephrite.

"Rock paper scissors," said Zoisite.

Nephrite shrugged.

After 30 rounds, someone did something other than rock.

Nephrite did paper, stealing the win.

"Tough luck," said Nephrite.

"Rrrrrrr!" said Zoisite, dividing it.

Nephrite picked his half, and Zoisite got too many lollipops and things that took a while to eat, rather than quick eat, quick reward candy.

"Darnit," said Zoisite. "Just my luck. I knew I should have thrown a paper on the 29th round. But I was afraid he was going to do triple prediction, and throw scissors. At which case my rock would have been victorious. But that's just not the way things played out. I accept that."

"Very mature," complimented Kunzite.

"Okay," said Nephrite, gobbling down. "We got one box of candy. I wonder how many more lives are going to have to be claimed before the end of this."

"Probably many," said Jadeite sadly. "Maybe we should go to a different town next year. I don't know what's up with this place. They're all saving the world, one thirteen-year-old given the business at a time."

"We can't do that," said Kunzite. "It's Shitennou tradition to trick-or-trick in this specific neighborhood. They always give full bars instead of snack-sizes. True heroes, despite their excessive adherence to the law."


Kenji and his son Shingle walked up to a door.

Kenji was dressed as Frankenstein, and he made his boy Shingle dress up as a caveman.

"Papa," complained Shingle. "I don't wanna wear this loincloth."

"Sorry, son," said Kenji. "I don't wanna wear this headband that looks like I have a metal bar through my head, but it's the only way to get some goodies. Some sugary delights," he added.

"Say," said Shingle. "You acted like you were taking me trick-or-treating. But to me, it sounds like you're more excited than I am."

"Ridiculous," said Kenji.

"Then why do I even have to go?" said Shingle. "I wanted to try giving out candy. I didn't want to dress up like this stupid caveman, with a big forehead. I didn't want to go trick-or-treating at all. Trick-or-treating's for babies."

"Watch it, son!" yelled Kenji, shaking his fist. "Or I'll take you to the cleaners."

When they arrived at the door, Kenji was still going.

The woman opened the door.

"If you don't quit complaining," Kenji went on. "The next place I'll take you is the cemetery. But tomorrow, because if I bury you today, you might come back to life as a ghoul. And I wouldn't want that. So tomorrow I'll kill you."

"Ahem," said the woman, nervously clearing her throat.

"Hello," said Kenji.

He nudged Shingle. "You know what to say, boy," said Kenj.

"Trick-or-treat," said Shingle, getting stage fright.

"Aaaah! What a cute caveman!" said the lady. "What a cute Neanderthal!"

She handed him the goods.

Shingle opened his mouth to say something.

"What a cute rock-dweller! What a sweet little prehistoric primate!"

"Okay," said Shingle. "You're embarrassing me!"

Kenji took Shingle's pumpkin, and poured it into his mouth, wrappers and all.

"OMNOMNOMNOM!" he said, munching fast.

Then he extended his paper bag.

"What is this?" said the woman, suspiciously.

"Trick-or-treat," said Kenji. "It's time for you to give me my candy. Since I'm with the boy."

"What do you think this is?" said the woman. "A world where you can trick-or-treat at any age? In other words, do you think this is some kind of free-for-all? A jamboree perhaps?"

"Well, no," said Kenji. "But I'm at the door. And I'm with my son. He is under 12, so I have the right to be here. So, perhaps you could spare me a single good."

She shook her head.

"That just won't work," she said. "I won't compromise my values."

"What?" said Kenji. "Yes it will work! Just hand me a Snickers, real quick! No one has to know!"

The woman reached for her cellphone, and Kenji assumed it was to call the police.

His assumption was proven right, when after he killed the woman, the phone screen had a 1 and a 1 already typed on it.

"Wooo!" said Kenji, removing his knee from her chest.

"That was a close one! Right Shingle?"

"I wanna go home!" cried Shingle. "You just keep killing everyone! You're just a regular man, it's gonna catch up to you! You can't keep this up forever!"

"You'll be the next I kill, boy," promised Kenji.

Kenji and Shingo went to the next house.

But they refused to give Kenji any treats.

Kenji had to settle for eating all of Shingle's candy.

"Papa," said Shingy. "Can't I have one piece?"

"Alright, fine," said Kenji, handing him a Whopper.

"Can I have another piece? Perhaps one that's not just your scraps you don't wanna eat?"

"Don't be picky now, son," said Kenji.

"But-!" said Shingle.

"Come on now," said Kenji. "I raised you to follow the saying, 'Beggars can't be choosers.'"

"But Papa!" said Shingle. "You're my father! Why am I a beggar? If it wasn't for me, you wouldn't even have any candy!"

"Boy," warned Kenji, raising his fist.

They went to the next house.

"You might be right that I couldn't run around alone down the streets," said Kenji. "But I'll prove to you that I can still get my own candy!"

However, the lady refused to give him candy, and Kenji had to kill his 3rd victim tonight.

"This won't do," said Kenji, eating Shingle's candy.

"Papa," said Shingle. "Why don't you save any candy until later? You've eaten 20 chocolate bars. It'd be better to save some."

"No," said Kenji. "You're just waiting for me to store it away for the night, so you can go grab some while I'm sleeping. But perhaps you won't live until tonight, which is why I have to eat it all now."

"That doesn't make sense!" said Shingle. "Just don't kill me!"

"No," said Kenji. "When something needs to be done, it is."

Shingle narrowed his eyes.

"I hate you, Papa," he said.

"Shut up," said Kenji. "Right back atcha. But we need to work together, to figure out a way to get me more candy."

"I don't see what's in it for me," said Shingle.

"You get to live a couple hours longer," said Kenji.

"I'll take it," decided Shing.


Shingo and Usagi walked up to a door.

"Trick-or-treat," they both said.

"Aaaaah," said a woman. "Two young kids. But one not young enough."

"Heh heh," said Usagi. "Well, I'm his chaperone. Can't let a ten-year-old around by himself in broad daylight now, can I?"

"Sorry," said the woman. "Only the boy gets a goody."

"What?!" cried Usagi.

"Haha," mocked Shingle. "Stupid Usagi."

"Shut your mouth," said Usagi. "Now what is this? I'm gonna punish this woman!"

"Try it," said the woman.

Usagi (base) shrugged, and then threw a punch.

But she just wasn't strong enough in her base form.

"Ugh," sighed Usagi, when the woman blocked her punch, and then deflected it. "Someday."

Her and Shingle met up with Kenji, who was sitting in a car.

"So?" said Kenji, rolling down his window. "Did they give you my candy, Usagi?"

"No," said Usagi. "I'm apparently too old."

"What?!" said Kenji. "You're 12!"

"No," said Usagi. "I mean, right."

Kenji stormed up to the door, and threw a punch to it.

The lady opened the door.

"Sir," said the lady. "Are you the man responsible for that delinquent 14-year-old who approached me door?"

"No," said Kenji. "My daughter is 12. She is chaperoning her little brother, Shingle."

"Hmmm," said the lady. "She doesn't look 12. She doesn't really look 14 either. But I knew she was, because I got the database of all school children, so I knew which ones were the right age."

"Now hold on!" said Usagi, marching back up. "What do you mean, I don't look 14?"

"Hmm," said the lady. "How do I put this?"

"Hey, watch it," said Kenji. "Are you sexually harassing my daughter?"

"No," said the lady. "But it's almost like she's designed to be attractive to a male audience, when really a girl her age wouldn't be so developed."

Kenji had enough, and snapped the woman's neck.

"What's with this crazy town?!" he howled.

"Onto the next house, children," commanded Kenji.

"Say," said Shingle to his sister. "Why are you helping evil Kenji?"

"Well," she said. "I like candy."

"Sadly," said Shingle. "Kenji will take it all."

"No," said Usagi. "He'll let me have a share, since I'm his favorite child."

"Must be nice," said Shingle. "I'm his least favorite. I hear he even wants to kill me."

"Noooooo," said Usagi.

Usagi and her bro Shing knocked on the next door.

"Hello," said Usagi. "I am chaperoning my younger brother, so don't think I'm some kind of delinquent."

"Ah," said the lady at the door.

She was putting her phone away. "I was about to call 119. But I'll allow it, this time."

"Thank you," said Usagi, as her eyes followed the candy being placed in Shingle's bag.

"Have a good day, you two," said the lady, since it wasn't night.

"Hey, wait!" said Usagi. "Don't I get some?

"NoOooOooooooOOOOOO!" said the lady, and then she began to cackle.

Kenji, who was watching the spectacle, took off his belt.

But Usagi acted first.

She had enough, and threw a punch, right into the woman's heart, killing her.

"That's my girl," said Kenji.

"Say," said Shingle. "What a mighty punch. Since when were you so tough?"

"Don't worry about it, slugger," said Usagi, ruffling the small boy's hair.

At the next house, Kenji accompanied them.

"I'll oversee things," said Kenji. "Since you failed to get candy from the living in the last two houses."

Kenji took off his belt, and yanked it, making sure it was firm.

"Aaah," he said. "I like a nice firm belt."

A man opened the door.

"Salutations," he said. "You 'kids' are out a little late, huh?"

"Ho ho ho," said Kenji. "Give us candy!"

"No no no!" said the man. "12 and under only!"

"My son Shingle was under 12," said Kenji.

"Was?" said the guy.

That's when Kenji picked up Shingle, spun him around like a chef cooking a pizza, and then brought his spine to his knee, ending it, along with Shingle.

"WOOOOOOOOOOAH!" said the man. "You just killed that kid!"

"No," said Kenji. "I just killed you."

Kenji killed the man, after a long fought battle, since they were both middle-aged and neither had been to a gym in a long time.

"Hey," said a child, stepping out. "Papa, is someone at the door?"

Kenji sighed, and threw a dropkick.

"Hey," said the wife, walking up. "What's with all the ruckus? Did a wild 13-year-old try to get some candy?"

Kenji threw his body, shoulder-first, toppling her and killing her such that she was dead before she hit the ground.

"Quick!" said Kenji. "RUUUUUN!"

Usagi and Kenji took off running in different directions, and never reunited again.

Kenji was too frustrated to go trick-or-treating, which was why he had to kill Shingle.

"Ughhhh," he said. "What kind of world is this? One where I kill Shingle? I believe so. Time to kill Shingle… oh, wait. Shoot," he said. "I wish I had a time machine. To kill Shingle. I should have tortured him first, instead of ending things rather quickly. Like eating a full chocolate bar in one bite. I miss ol' Shingle. He's been gone too long. But most importantly, I miss the candy he donated to me. SHHHHIIIIIIIIIIINGGGLEEEEE!"


The Shitennou continued down the street, a trail of blood in their wake.

"Mmmm," said Jadeite, eating nerds. "They say these are grape flavored, but they taste like any regular box of nerds."

"You know what they remind me of?" said Nephrite. "Melvin."

"Hey!" said Melvin. "I'm a geek, not a nerd! There's a difference!"

"Then where does spaz fit into the equation?" asked Zoisite.

"You have a lot to learn," said Melvin. "Oh, and I'm also a dweeb."

"Jadeite," said Kunzite. "I'll trade you some of my candy for a Twizzler."

"No way, kid," said Jadeite. "Nice try!"

"RRrRRRrR!" said Kunzite, clenching his fist.

"Nephrite," he said.

"No way," said Nephrite.

"What is this?" said Kunzite. "A jamboree?"

"I would give you one if I possessed it," said Zoisite, eating his last Twizzler.

"Nooooooo," said Kunzite. "How hard do I have to work to get a Twizz?"

"We can buy a whole bag," said Zoisite.

"That's just not how it works," said Kunzite. "The bag ones taste completely different from the individually wrapped ones. Almost like they came from another universe."

"They did," said Jadeite. "I would know, as I'm a spaceman."

"Yes," said Zoisite. "But you're still a spaceman of this universe."

"Hmmm," said Jadeite. "You don't know that."

As they walked, they passed a kid in a costume of a kid.

"Why's a kid need to dress up like a kid?" asked Jed.

"I'm no kid," said Grandpa. "I'm 3,000 years old. And that's just in this life."

"Grandpa?" asked Kunzite. "Why are you dressed as a child?"

"There are many rules out there," said Grandpa. "I use this costume to slip into the elementary schools."

He walked up to a door.

"ID?" asked a man. "ID or no candy," he specified, just to make it clear.

Grandpa pulled out his ID.

"Ah," said the man. "Jimmy Youngboy. Very legit. Here you go."

"Thank you," said Grandpa.

He threw his sack over his back and carried on his way.

"Hmmm," said Jadeite. "I wish we were short young men. But only for today. It'd stink to permanently be that short."

"Yes," said Kunzite. "How does he live like that? With the stature of a small child?"

"He's a small man," said Zoisite. "But he packs a punch."

They got to a door.

"Let me guess," said Nephrite. "They're gonna put up a fight."

"No doubt," said Zoisite.

Zoisite knocked on the door.

A woman walked out, but then she scowled.

"If it isn't a pack of hooligans," she said. "Don't you know that there's an age restriction?"

"What do you mean?" said Zoisite. "Trick-or-treating is for all ages. And also, we're 12."

"No you're not," said the lady. "You are grown men."

"Proof?" demanded Zoisite.

But his argument was shallow.

"No need," said the lady. "You have the voices of grown men. And you're all towering over me. Except for this pipsqueak here, who must be a late bloomer amongst your pack."

"Hey, watch it," said Melvin. "Or I'll unleash the Dark Flame Dragon!"

"Shut up," said Zoisite, to his own crew member.

"Lady," said Nephrite. "If we could just have some candy. It is hard enough to have the bodies of grown men at 12 years old."

But that's when the lady spotted Nephrite, and had a disgusted look.

"Get away from my door, you big ape," she sneered.

"Big ape?" said Nephrite. "Big ape?"

"You heard my, gorilla," said the lady.

"I'm Donkey Kong!" said Nephrite. "Don't you see the tie?"

"It doesn't matter what you are, you jungle beast, because you are over 12."

"It doesn't matter if you give us candy or not," said Zoisite. "Because your fate is already sealed. It was ever since you called Donkey Kong here a 'Big ape.'"

"Ook ook!" said Nephrite, imitating Donkey Kong.

He pounded his chest, as the lady started to get terrified.

She tried to run, but Nephrite swung his fist around in a circular motion, imitating Donkey Kong's neutral special from Smash.

He unleashed the Donkey Kong fist, and the lady was obliterated.

"GOTTEM!" said Melvin.

"Slam dunk," agreed Nephrite. "Wombo combo."

"That up-smash!" commented Kunzite.

"No," said Nephrite. "It's his neutral special."

"Darnit," said Kunzite.

They got to the next door.

"Oook ook!" said Nephrite, still in the donkey mood.

"He's the leader of the bunch. You know him well. He's finally back, to kick some tail," explained Jadeite.

The lady opened the door.

"NOOO!" she said. "You're too OOOLD!"

"Come on," said Melvin. "I think I can pass as a 12er."

"I think you can go to prison!" she yelled. "My husband's a cop! Sick'em, my boy!"

That's when her husband ran out, in full uniform, and unleashed his Taser.

Melvin instantly perished before the Shitennou even knew the battle began.

Kunzite ran and socked the man in the chops.

But he was a fighter, and retaliated with a leaping kick.

Kunzite caught it, and threw the man to the ground.

He leapt off the man's porch and threw a piledriver into the man's chest, killing him.

"Noooooooooooooo," said the lady. "He died protecting an important law."

That's when Kunzite unleashed a punch, tossing the lady across the room.

Jadeite ran up and bodyslammed her before she hit the wall, and then threw many blows, until she was gone.

But not physically. But however her spirit went to the other world.

"Farewell," said Jadeite to her spirit, not her body, which still remained.

Her lifeless body dropped to the ground.

"Eeeeeeeeasy," said Jadeite.

He took her priceless vase and headed on his way.

"Good catch," said Jadeite.


It was 3 PM, and all the houses had turned their lights off and shut their doors.

"Whelp, that about wraps up this Halloween," said Jadeite.

"I'm surprised we were able to get candy from one at 2:59," said Nephrite. "But she did fight back, before finally coming around."

On their way back to the Dark Kingdom, they passed by someone familiar to them.

However, they weren't familiar to him. At least not at first.

After passing them, the man turned around.

"Hey!" said Motoki.

The Shitennou turned around, and spotted Motoki, dressed as Shaggy from Scooby Doo.

The whole Crown Arcade brigade was there, as it turned out.

Motoki's sister was dressed as Scooby, and Orange Man was dressed as Fred. Reika was Daphne, and Motoki's mom was Velma.

Someone was even pulling along a Mystery Machine, which was just a painted wagon.

"What do you want?" said Kunzite.

Motoki narrowed his eyes. "Is that man supposed to be ME?"

"Ah!" said Zoisite. "Do you like my costume?"

"No!" said Motoki. "Take that off right now! You're spoiling my good name! What if someone tells you their token got stuck in a game machine, thinking you're me, and you don't refund them!? It will give Crown Arcade a bad name!"

Zoisite paused for a moment, thinking of a witty response.

However, he had none, so he just threw a beam without saying a word.

Motoki was gone, and Motoki's sister didn't like it.

Scooby ran up and threw her body, since that's Motoki's sister's signature move.

"Get this hound off me!" cried Zoisite.

Kunzite picked the mangy mutt off the ground, and threw her off into space, where Jadeite's costume came from.

Motoki's mom threw a leaping kick.

But Jadeite blocked it with his arm.

Motoki's mom wasn't finished though, and threw four blows.

But none of them landed.

Jadeite threw a punch into her stomach, and while it was still connected, unleashed lightning.

He turned to Reika, but she had a heart attack.

"Daphne down!" yelled Orange Man.

"Would you like to go next?" asked the gorilla. "I will throw a barrel past your grave."

"Let me live," pleaded the Orange Man.

"Sorry, that won't do," said Zoisite. "You and the Mystery Gang will have to be solving mysteries in hell."

Orange Man went into fight or flight, and decided it was all or nothing.

He threw a right hook, but Kunzite ducked under it.

Zoisite threw a knee, tossing the Orange Man into a gas station.

The pump exploded, and he went out magnificently in a burning ball of ember.

"Seeya," said Nephrite.

"Wouldn't wanna be ya," added Jadeite.

"It's a shame," said Kunzite. "He could have just minded his own business. If I saw something dressed as me, I would just keep walking, because I'd know it's trouble. No one would dress up as someone else unless they had the strength to topple them in combat."

"Right," said Zoisite. "Motoki could have lived a chapter."

"He lives on in your disguise," reminded Nephrite.

"I guess so," said Zoisite. "Too bad."

FIN