CHAPTER 3.5

'Lost in your mind.

I wanna know.

Am I losing my mind?

Never let me go.'


Shoulder to shoulder, Finnick and Cato were surrounded by District Thirteen and those who had been fortunate enough to survive the blast from Twelve as they stared up at President Coin. Everyone had gathered (forced to gather) so as to hear the important announcement and whilst they already knew the terms, both men were crackling with anticipation. This was the first major leap towards getting their girls back.

The room full of rebels fell silent when Coin began to talk. However, the room soon filled with angered mumbling once the pardon for the captured Tributes was announced. Both Finnick and Cato shifted uneasily shifted uneasily as the majority of the rebels turned to look up at Katniss with hostile gazes after hearing what she had demanded.

"In return for this unprecedented request, Soldier Everdeen has promised to devote herself to our cause. Any deviance from her mission, in either motive or deed, will be viewed as a break in this agreement. The immunity will be terminated and the fate of the five prisoners determined by the law of District Thirteen. As will her own. Thank you." Coin finished her speech with a bow of the head before turning on her heel and walking away from her people, leaving them to digest the information.

Staring up at the Mockingjay, Cato began to worry that the young woman had taken on too much too soon. If she stepped out of line, it was possible that she would forfeit her life. And the slightly terrified look on her face showed that Katniss knew as much.


Struggling against the leather bonds that strapped her to the table, Indiana attempted to scream but the gag in her mouth muffled any sound, dribble running down her cheek. Whether it was there or not made no difference as the soundproof walls prevented anybody outside the room from being able to hear her. Hot tears slid down the side of her face as she dreaded the pain that would soon be inflicted upon her again. Footsteps echoed inside her head, pain splitting across her skull as they did. Fear filled her heart as each footstep came ominously closer to the quivering girl.

"Good morning, Miss Summers. I trust you had a pleasant evening." President Snow's face loomed over the blonde woman.

Indiana was unable to find the courage to do anything other than glare at the man with intense hatred but he only let out a chuckle, sending chills of warning skittering down her spine.

"Now, before we begin, is there any information regarding rebel plans you wish to disclose to me?"

Once again, the prisoner remained silent. However, there were many things she wished she were able to say; rude things that would get her into serious trouble and serious pain. Thankfully, the gag prevented anything other than angry muffles from escaping her lips.

"No? Commence."

Snow's face disappeared and Indiana squeezed her eyes shut, clenching her fists in anticipation. Absolute agony coursed through her entire body as the breath was squeezed from her lungs and electricity coursed through her veins. Her body writhed and shook, back arching off the table. This time, her screams reverberated around the room, loud and broken.

The pain stopped.

Indiana collapsed back onto the table, panting and sobbing as her body worked its way through the pain. Pressing her cheek to the table, she was greeted the cold metal with sorrow and joy, grateful for it for the first time since she'd been strapped to it.

"I will ask again, Miss Summers. Is there anything you wish to tell me?"

Shaking her head through the tears, Indiana closed her eyes and dreamed of Cato as the fire raced along her body. Save me, she begged the hallucination, take me away from this awful place.


Punch.

Punch.

Punch.

Adrenaline coursed through his veins as he repeatedly smashed the grey punching bag. Various faces appeared on the bag and a new one replaced the previous as he pulled his fist back each time.

President Snow. Punch.

President Coin. Punch.

His father. Punch.

Marvel. Punch.

Peeta. Punch.

Himself. Punch.

The bag swung violently and Cato had to jump back a step so as to avoid being taken down by it. Resting his body against the grey wall, he chugged down the rest of his water bottle. So many memories haunted him, both day and night.

President Snow had forced so many innocent children to go through hell, murdering 23 of them for 75 years and yet Cato was the one suffering from it. Snow had stolen Cato's fiancée and everything she had held dear to her, completely destroying her family.

President Coin was resting the safety of the captured tributes on the shoulder of an emotionally damaged girl, crushing her under further pressure and stress.

His father had forced him to volunteer for the Games, moulded him into the feared brute of the 74th Annual Hunger Games, and constantly ensured Cato felt as if he was never good enough.

Peeta had caused so much damage to the system with his 'star crossed lovers' trope and then he had murdered Indiana. Now, he was somewhere in the Capitol by her side, comforting her and holding her hand when Cato couldn't.

Himself – the monster. The man who broke everything he touched. Somehow, he had managed to find the one person broken enough herself that she saw everything that Cato was and decided to love him regardless. She had wormed her way into his cold heart and he, like the screw up he was, had managed to lose her.

Letting out an infuriated yell, Cato spun around and smashed his fist into the wall, pounding it repeatedly with more fervour than he had the punching bag.

"WHY?!" He bellowed, punching until the skin cracked and the blood bubbled.

Pain flared across his knuckles, old scabs splitting (from the last time he had punched the wall) but he ignored it as he slid down the wall. Hanging his head into his hands, he sobbed. And sobbed. For hours, he sat there sobbing, even after the tears had run out.

At some point, Finnick had joined him, sitting by his side and silently mourning the ones they had lost. Eventually, the man from Four wrapped his arm around Cato's shoulder and hugged the younger man until the pair of them had been alerted that dinner was ready. Looking around at the mess he had made of the gym, Cato was reminded once more that he was a monster. A monster to be feared and so he would make the Capitol fear him until they handed Indiana back to him.


Hours later, Indiana's body had gone numb and her head foggy. Consciousness slipped away from her and returned every so often (long enough for her to empty her stomach onto the floor). Her mouth was dry, her eyes puffy and red and her bowels empty. Parts of her limbs twitched involuntarily from aftershock and incoherent mumbles slipped past her lips.

"Come on, Sweetie. You have to pull yourself together. They're coming back. Remember, do not let them see your weakness." Gloss' voice pulled Indiana out of her half-comatose state.

Rolling her head to the side, she threw up bile for the billionth time before turning back to face her aunt and uncle. They smiled down at their niece with faces of love and pride, just as they had always done.

"You're strong, Sweetheart. So strong. Never forget that. Don't let them break your spirit." Cashmere placed a kiss upon her niece's head, and then disappeared when the door to the chamber opened.

"We love you so much." Gloss smiled as he began to fade.

Two Peacekeepers dragged Indiana off the table, and held her between them, used to her weight from the numerous times they had to pull her back to her cell. Forcing her into the jailed room, they slammed the door shut as she curled up into a ball on the ground. The numbness had started to fade and the pain began settling in as her muscles began seizing up.

Indiana ignored it.

Her aunt and uncle were right – she had been through worse. Heck, she had died before. Indiana Summers was strong. She would get through this, and she would make the Capitol regret the day they had decided to harm her or anyone else.


'Unconscious mind.

I'm wide awake.

Wanna feel one last time.

Take my pain away.'