Chapter 14

Anomie awoke before the light passed through the opening of the window to the east. She wasn't sad. She wasn't happy. She didn't feel anything. She wasn't depressed or disgusted. Or perhaps she was all of that, and it was only rushing through her so quickly that she didn't know what to feel.

Genma's arm was wrapped around her as if she were his lifeline. Looking at him now, sleeping and quiet and content dropped her to flashbacks of all her years as an Oiran. It was an oddly cheap feeling that made her blink as she hovered her hand over his neck. She contemplated the seals on her wrists. In one motion, she could slit his throat and be done with it.

"And you sure as hell aren't a murderer!"

She slapped her hand, once hovering over his neck, over her mouth with so forceful a motion that she saw him twitch. Panicking, she flicked her hand into a seal without a second thought. Sadly, her places to go were limited and she barely had time to process where her Chakra sent her until it was too late and she was already in Kakashi's apartment.

Appearing in nothing but skimpy panties and a loose tank top didn't sit well with him as she all but body flickered on top of him.

"You're kidding," were his first words when she tilted her head and glanced over to his sleepy face as his body slowly sat up from the bed she landed on.

"Good morning," she stated lamely as he kneaded his temples as he attempted to shift out of bed. His action tripped her and she ended up falling completely on top of him. Her reflexes were on par with his as his hands gripped her sides while her hands landed on each side of his face with her lips just inches away from his.

His eyes were wide as he was able to feel the heat of her body on top of him. It was early in the morning, so he was still barely awake, but he was awake enough to fell nearly everything underneath her thin top brushing against him through the much to thin material of their clothes.

Her eyes were hypnotizing, and he became much too aware of his hands on her sides. He even noticed that her breathing had slightly hitched in a way that made every part of him want to flip them over so he could run his fingers across her skin. Her legs were wrapped around his waist and he could feel a part of her skin against his leg in such a manner that it burned.

His heart thumped in his chest so loudly that he could barely hear her whisper his name. Hearing her hoarse and labored breath made him almost lose all sense of reason.

Her scent was what stopped him from giving in. He tried to ignore it at first, but a foreign scent was all over her and he could vaguely feel Genma's Chakra from her apartment. He knew it was stupid to feel hurt, but with this scent lingering on her lips, he felt oddly subdued. It was enough to gently slip out from under her.

Anomie had guessed what was wrong the moment his eyes closed and he pulled away. But as she sat up, alone on the bed, she could still feel his fingers against her skin. His palms had been hot against her sides and she felt oddly warm.

The content feeling she had woke up with abruptly disappeared.

She didn't have much time to think more of the subject as a shirt was tossed in her direction. She swiftly caught it and glanced towards Kakashi's unamused expression. She found herself slightly smirking at his obvious judgment of her clothes, but she didn't say anything against it.

"Grow some modesty," he commented, but there was no conviction in his voice.

"Maybe tomorrow," she murmured in return as she slipped on the shirt. It was long enough to cover her panties, but if she reached her arms up, they were sure to show.

She caught Kakashi's eye, and saw his face was oddly unreadable. She slipped off the bed and took a step closer to him. She contemplated pulling down his mask, but settled for smiling.

"Food?" She asked, her voice so innocent that Kakashi let out a light chuckle. His hand landed on her head and ruffled her hair.

It wasn't something he had ever done before, and the action was so sudden and affectionate that it caused her eyes to widen. Her heart thumped in her chest with such force and palpitation that she almost took a step back.

He took no notice as he walked to the fridge.

She glanced his back with wide eyes as she pressed her fingers against her head where the presence of his fingers still lingered like a disease. She took a deep breath and cleared her thoughts. By the time she opened her eyes again, her gaze was blank, but her heart still hammered in her chest as she took a couple steps closer to the kitchen and leaned on the marble counter. He pulled out watermelon from the fridge.

Her eyes slightly widened in delight, and he saw it before she could correct herself. He didn't say anything and only watched as she grabbed piece after piece. Unlike the rice, she didn't take small nibbles and instead finished it off in momentary bites.

"The first food that you've given me that actually tastes decent," she commented after a moment.

He scoffed, "I'm not obligated to feed you."

"No," Anomie's face consorted in a tight smile. "No you're not." She didn't speak for a while, and her words made Kakashi frown from underneath his mask.

"Well, if I didn't I doubt you would ever eat," he murmured smoothly.

"You'd never allow that now would you," she mused, and he shrugged. Her lips contorted into a small smirk. "What? You're not gonna ask me how it was?"

"How what was?" He spoke before he could realize she had baited him.

She glanced over, rice ball in her hand which she nibbled small bites so as to continue talking. "So that's how you're going to be. That's fine. I like this better. Good food after a long night."

Kakashi undoubtedly would have torn the book in two if not for his control. He decided to hold it in one hand instead of two, so as to keep himself from ruining the one good thing in his life.

"Well, thanks for the shirt and the food," she stated, closing her eyes as she stood up. Her legs were still bare as she did, and she hated the intoxicating smell of his clothes. It felt all too intimate. If she didn't leave now-

"Stay safe," he mumbled it, and it sounded forced and reluctant, but oddly genuine.

Even after she purposefully set out to hurt him, he still wanted her to be safe. Her eyes narrowed as she turned her head to him.

He could feel her scrutinizing stare, but he was too exhausted and exasperated to care. Mostly, he just wanted her to leave before he lost his temper or worse, lost his composure.

And yet, a strong part of him wanted to close the distance and ruffle her hair. Maybe smack her back against the wall and ravage her lips. It would be so easy. It would take five steps. Five simple steps.

But she smelled like Genma and her hair was messier than he had ever seen it.

If he looked hard enough, he could clearly see the imprint of red marks on her neck.

He had to remind himself, but perhaps they were all just excuses.

"Well, when am I not safe?" She mused, her shoulders relaxing.

Kakashi scoffed, glancing back towards his book.

The distance that had finally started to shorten between them, in just one night, grew tenfold. Kakashi began to wonder if he was the only one who cared.

Maybe he was, but if that weren't the case then perhaps she wouldn't be the Anomie he knew in the first place.

By the time he actually glanced up again, she was already gone.

»»⎯⎯⎯¤⎯⎯⎯««

Anomie meant to just spare a passing glance at her Anbu locker, but the bloody red print of "murderer" caused her to stare a moment to long. She sensed bad karma, but she opened the locker anyway. She expected worse than what she received, as all her things were torn to bits.

She glanced at small pictures that had been taped to her locker, each one sporting an image of the dead or missing victims of Konoha. Four, she recognized, were the faces of the bodies she had found. The rest she didn't recognize, but murderer was written on every one of them.

She wanted to scoff. As if these petty misguided taunting would make her fret. There wasn't much she had in this world, but Anbu possessions were easily replaced.

She slammed the locker shut, her eyes running over to the boy who just entered the room. He had a distinctive look. A very Uchiha look to him, what with his tear ducts underneath his eyes and onyx eyes that matched his raven black hair.

She raised a brow.

He was younger than any Anbu she had ever seen, and certainly younger than she or Kakashi had been when they joined.

She noticed his eyes dart to the locker, and oddly enough, his expression didn't so much as waver.

"Younger ever year. Pretty soon we'll be fighting alongside infants," Anomie murmured, running her fingers over her wrist were the seals had been placed. They were her emergency clothes, but she supposed it was an emergency.

She barely noticed the boy's lips twitch up, but he paid her no more heed as he placed the basket of items into his locker, directly next to hers.

"Oho," a new voice entered the room, brought by a body that she barely recognized, but the mask was that of a nostalgic monkey. "Cover your eyes, Uchiha, she has a certain liking for snatching them."

The boy didn't much twitch in the monkey's direction. Anomie expression grew blank as she put on her cat mask, strapping it around her head.

"He's a little too old," Anomie's voice was low and it echoed in her mask. "Don't you remember? I like them younger."

The monkey gave her the reaction she wanted when he turned around sharply and left the barracks.

"Asshole," Anomie muttered, not sparing the Uchiha boy one more second of her thoughts as she calmly walked out. Insults against Anomie didn't bother her as long as she wore the mask of Koneko.

»»⎯⎯⎯¤⎯⎯⎯««

Itachi Uchiha was still ten when he joined Anbu. He was ten when he joined team Neko. He was ten when he met Anomie. He was ten when he watched her stand by and watch their third teammate tortured and murdered.

"We can't help him," Anomie muttered, glancing towards the weasel-masked boy- although she doubted she could call him a boy anymore. He had long sense proved himself to be a monster in combat. He had also proved himself to be watching her closely, no doubt her every action reported back to the revenge seeking Uchiha clan. "He got caught. If we blow our position the mission will fail and more will die."

"I understand," Itachi's voice was empty, and she glanced towards the weasel, tilting her head to the side as her white ponytail fell over her shoulder.

Not many actually obeyed her orders, captain of her team or not, so his agreement made her oddly relieved. "I don't trust him not to blow our mission," she admitted, opening her fist into a flat palm, and her hand turned into smoke and she slowly closed her eyes. The smoke drifted away, through the branches of the trees.

The girl didn't move a muscle and was as still as stone as the smoke turned invisible to the naked eye.

The encampment tent, two minutes later, erupted with the pained scream of their lost teammate. The pained moan lasted for little under a minute before it was silent. Seconds later, Anomie's eyes opened and her hand was back. She glanced towards Itachi; her vibrant pink eyes were in slits through the Anbu mask.

"Lets go," she murmured, clenching and unclenching her fist. "Might as well not make his death in vain."

Itachi wondered, albeit briefly, if she chose to kill because it was simpler than rescue. His head awoke with scenarios of possible ways to save the fallen crow, and finish the mission. When he brought it up after the mission, the look in her eyes said everything.

"You're right," she said simply, washing her hands of blood in the river. The clear water darkened with red. "Any plan I had would have possibly saved Crow. The mission could have been salvaged. I suppose. But unforeseen events always arise. I don't deal with possibilities. It's either success or failure. I don't need chances or maybes or what if. His capture was his own fault and as a Shinobi of the Leaf, it's either the village or death. You protect your village, no matter the cost. I'd rather choose saving the masses and being a villain, than saving one and being a martyr."

Anomie sighed, placing a slightly damp hand on her side. She slowly continued, "There's nothing wrong with being the villain if you are certain that your actions are for the greater good. People are stupid and don't look at the big picture. If they want to label me a heartless murderer, so be it."

"Doesn't it ever hurt you?" Itachi asked, and Anomie's lips formed into a frown from underneath the mask. The kid really knew how to ask the scathing questions.

Itachi had prided himself to understand someone's thoughts. He had always prided himself on reading people through their eyes, because as an Uchiha, he had been taught that the key to everything is in their eyes. And yet, through Anomie he only saw a void. An empty void. He wondered if it was a cover or if somewhere in that blackness, there was an actual person.

He also wondered if that void was in his future as well, just waiting to swallow him whole.

"Everyday," she said after a pregnant pause.

»»⎯⎯⎯¤⎯⎯⎯««

"This mission is better than the rest," Tetsuna Hyūga murmured, her pale eyes glancing towards their leader.

Anomie shrugged, cleaning off her blade with her back against the tree. It was an odd habit, Itachi had noticed, as she cleaned it everyday without fail, whether it was stained with blood or not. He had never felt the need to ask, but Tetsuna had no such opposition or tact or rather, lack of curiosity.

"It's clean. Why still scrub it?" The owl of their team asked, causing Anomie to glance up.

"It's my blade. What's it to you?" She asked calmly, as she had no love for their third teammate. Anomie was never too polite to the third member, as they usually died anyway. It was now known as the cursed position of Neko.

Although, Itachi didn't believe in curses. He did however believe in idiots. Owls and crows had a tendency to be idiots.

"Fine, don't tell me," Tetsuna stated with a bored shrug, causing her auburn hair to bob up and down. "I wasn't interested anyway..."

He very much doubted it. Tetsuna always proved to care about everything.

Yaya Umehoshi sighed, adjusting her position. "Can't we stay somewhere more comfortable?"

"We're Anbu babysitters," Tetsuna muttered, leaning back against the tree.

It was an odd mission to assign the hit squad of Anbu, but Itachi didn't complain. Being a bodyguard wasn't the worst that could happen, but he had doubts that the lack of action and death was satisfying enough for Anomie.

"We can take you to an establishment," Itachi stated. "But the journey will take at least another five hours, and nightfall is in less than 22 minutes. If night hits and our forces are spread out in the dark protecting you, chances of surprise attacks and death increase by fifty eight percent."

Anomie's scoff echoed in her mask as she continued wiping down her blade. "Probability isn't on your side, princess."

Yaya, having expressed her dislike of the leader early, merely snorted and crossed her arms. "Can't I at least have a blanket? Or will being warm increase the probability of death as well?"

Instead of getting annoyed at the woman's obviously annoyed retort, Anomie merely rolled up her sleeve and traced her fingertips over the seals on her arm. In moments, a blanket appeared in a cloud of smoke. She tossed it at the Umehoshi princess and the cloth landed perfectly on the woman's head.

"I hate you," Yaya muttered, shoving off the blanket from her head.

Anomie shrugged and went back to wiping down her blade. The life of a ninja. Anomie almost broke out in giggles at the thought, but didn't get the chance as her eyes snapped up, seconds after Itachi stood and ducked towards Yaya, grabbing her and darting away from the sudden barrage of power that destroyed the forest ground.

"Probability doesn't count for shit, we were attacked anyway," Tetsuna exclaimed, byakugan activated without a moment's notice. "Where's Koneko?"

"Preoccupied," Anomie murmured, eyes narrowed as her blade stopped the oncoming attack of a giant bandaged sword. The tree she once leaned back on was currently destroyed a foot away from her, and her arms shook with the tremor of the blue man's strength and blow that sent the ground underneath and the trees around to splinters.

The blue man grinned, his teeth an array of sharp canines. "You are fast."

"I think I ate your cousin for dinner last night," Anomie replied simply, trying to ignore that this man's strength was beginning to wear her arms out. "Is it racist to say that all sharks taste like gamy crap?"

In a split second of blinding anger, Anomie had her advantage and discovered the blue man's blazing weakness. She took her second to dissolve into smoke, causing the strength of the blade to fall forward an inch when the force of Anomie's katana fell to the ground and the girl had disappeared in a mere moment.

Itachi glanced around from the trees, but before he could sense her power, the girl was naked and in full form from next to him. Yaya, who looked to barely be recovering from the attack, spoke in a hushed whisper, "why is she naked?"

"I get off on it," Anomie answered, activating her seal until she was fully clothed once more. "Tetsuna, get Umehoshi out of here. Itachi and I will take care of dinner."

"Got it. Whatever," Tetsuna replied, grabbing the princess, despite said woman's complaints. "I like my sushi cooked."

"Trust me, this fire is roaring to go," Anomie raised her hand, and the moment Tetsuna jumped away, she snapped her fingers and the forest lit in flames.

"Kill or capture?" Itachi asked, and the girl glanced his way.

"Whichever is easier...he's damn strong," she answered, just before disappearing into the flames. "Distract and I'll go for the kill. You know what to do."

"Get out here you pussy," the blue man snapped, waving his sword to brush away the flames.

In moments, he was met with a barrage of perfectly aimed kunai, cascading and trapping him into a circle. Itachi's movements were so swift that the giant blue man had to take a swift step back in surprise. In moments, Itachi's body seemed to flicker away like an illusion that swarmed into a hundred black crows.

Anomie glanced towards the rising smoke, feeling the flames lick her skin, smoking and disappearing all around her. She could vaguely hear the sound of Itachi's fight, but she didn't open her eyes as she spread her fingers apart with her arms stretched open wide. The flames didn't hurt and her body spread apart with it as every fiber of her being spread into the flames.

"You are an impressive kid," the blue man stated, dodging Itachi's forceful attacks. "I'm not usually impressed, but I see you going far. I hate to admit it, but I'm getting depleted."

Itachi didn't comment or so much as blink when the fires erupted around the forest, all attacking the blue enemy ninja head on in a fiery explosion just as Itachi jumped back.

It was only forty minutes later after the flames took out a greater portion of the forest, did Tetsuna and Itachi find Anomie, dropping from a small cloud of smoke in the sky, naked and to the ground.

"Is he dead?" Yaya had asked from behind Tetsuna's body.

"He retreated," Anomie replied, standing straight as hair fell over her should. She was fully clothed by the time she stood straight and she wasted no time to tie her lose hair back into a bun, he Anbu mask still covering any possible expression.

"You blew up the forest," Tetsuna muttered, obviously displeased as her leader glanced her way.

"I will keep the ecosystem in mind next time I'm saving your life."

»»⎯⎯⎯¤⎯⎯⎯««

"I don't know how you managed to do it, but I'm alive." Yaya stated, the outlines of Kumo in the distance. The girl could almost feel the tastes of home on her tongue. The girl glanced towards the Leaf team with an almost kind smile. "I rather thought you were a bunch of half assed freaks when I first met you, but I'm glad I was wrong."

"We are half-assing it," Tetsuna replied, her owl mask tilting to the side along with her head.

"Well, I can't wait to get home," Yaya happily skipped forward, and in a split moment, Itachi lurched forward, grabbing onto the girl and tossing her to the side.

The rest moved by in such a blur that Anomie almost found herself lost along side it, barely noticing when a giant blue arm wrapped around Tetsuna's fragile neck. Itachi stood, as if he hadn't just saved the Kumo princess's life and as if their teammate wasn't now between a shark and death.

"You really do amaze me kid," the blue shark said with a wide and toothy grin as his eyes glanced towards Itachi and Anomie's formations.

"Man, this sucks," Tetsuna murmured after a feeble attempt to get out from the blue man's hold.

"The name's Kisame, by the way," the fish said, flashing another predatory grin. "And I'm going to need the brat."

"What for?" Anomie asked simply.

"I have been paid to kill her. Safe to say that my organization needs the money," Kisame seemed to have no such problem in stating his intentions, but he was slightly unnerved by how calm Anomie was in her position. There wasn't an ounce of malice in her form, not a moment of stiffness in her spine, or a single bit of worry in her eyes. "So, I'll strike you a deal. You give me the Kumo bitch, and I'll let this girl live." Kisame's arm tightened around Tetsuna's throat.

"Okay, if you're gonna do something, do it now," Tetsuna muttered out, her Anbu mask falling off when Kisame's strong arm tightened around her girl was rather beautiful underneath the mask and she had bright blue eyes that went well with her pale skin. They were the eyes of a Hyūga. Anomie tilted her head as she relaxed her shoulders.

"Make your choice," Kisame stated. "I've never been a fan of hostage situations, so I'd rather get this over with."

"I've already made my choice," Anomie said simply, and Yaya felt a rush of fear when the pale pink eyes of the cat like girl landed on her.

Itachi knew better. He knew Anomie pretty well in his month of being on her team. She was the one who broke him into the life of a true ninja. A true soldier of this village.

Once again, Anomie's eyes were a void of blackness, waiting for the ignorant and the foolish to get lost and disappear. Itachi knew that the white haired captain's default action was to protect the mission and the village. There was only one person who had any need to feel fear.

Anomie's hand faded into smoke and in an instant of movement her palm flushed through Tetsuna's chest, at the same time impaling Kisame's abdomen in one swift motion. The blood splashed over Anomie's mask, and Tetsuna's eyes had opened wide, and her mouth made a gurgling sound that proved Anomie's attack had pierced a lung.

"You bitch," Kisame muttered, jumping back and letting the Hyūga girl fall to the ground, legs giving away to the force of the blow just a second after Anomie jumped back.

"W-Why?" Tetsuna palmed the wound, as if trying to keep herself from falling apart as her blood spilled over the forest floor. She didn't have to be a Hyūga to recognize that her leader had punctured an artery.

"You know why," Anomie's voice wasn't harsh, just cold.

Actually, everything was cold, Tetsuna noticed with calm awareness.

Slowly, the girl fell back to the forest floor, her eyes closing for the last time.

"That was cold for a Leaf ninja," Kisame stated, holding his bleeding wound.

"I weighed my options and would formally like to reject your proposition," Anomie replied, barely moved when Kisame began to laugh. His laughter rumbled in his chest as he squeezed his fingers into his wound, bits of his blue flesh covered in red.

"I know when I've been outmaneuvered. I'm absolutely livid," Kisame still laughed as his eyes narrowed in mirth, glancing between Anomie and Itachi. After a solid minute, he let out a lower chuckle, "but at least I got to see something interesting," Kisame glanced between the two ninja once more, noticing Itachi had already helped the shell-shocked Yaya back to her feet. "As much as fighting you gets my blood pumping, I would rather see you another time."

And like that, with one last grin, Kisame rested his giant bandaged blade on his shoulder blades and disappeared.

"Why did you do it? She was your teammate?" The question wasn't asked until they were at the village gates, and some of the arrogance had left Yaya's eyes.

"I'd rather one dead teammate than risking this brittle bond between Konoha and Kumo." Anomie said simply, ignoring Yaya's frown. "It's not as if Owl did not know that."

"I don't think she did," Yaya murmured, later on as she watched the two ninja disappear into the trees.

»»⎯⎯⎯¤⎯⎯⎯««

Anomie came back to her locker with murderer written in bold red print.

By the time Kakashi walked into the locker room, he found it empty but Anomie's locker was beaten with the engraving of fists. He could vaguely still see the almost unreadable markings. It was enough to see that they were written, but whatever they said had been damaged and smashed.

"You're her friend?" Itachi's voice was emotionless as he came up behind Kakashi's form.

They both said nothing about the damages, but Itachi swiftly noticed that although his locker was right next to hers, his hadn't a scratch.

"I doubt she believes she has friends," Kakashi finally murmured.

»»⎯⎯⎯¤⎯⎯⎯««

"What do you mean I'm suspended?" The third Hokage was always one to pride himself on the ability to read people, but Anomie had always been that rare exception. That made it surprising to see the girl- who prided herself on the ability to hide emotions- lose such control and allow anger to flood into her voice.

Or perhaps it wasn't anger. Perhaps it was humility, sadness, doubt, betrayal- all the things that made this girl as unpredictable as the wind.

"I am afraid that the council and I have found this to be the only way," Sarutobi sounded tired, but she ignored it as easily as she ignored the bags under his eyes.

"I'm scape goat. You can't find the murderer so you've decided to shove punishment ahead without proper evidence," she said clearly, but almost immediately corrected her expression and her tone. "I get it. Your hand has been pushed. Innocent or not, I suppose I should ask why. What changed?"

"New bodies."

Her eyes widened in what seemed to be surprise, but the third Hokage wasn't able to put much thought into it before all her emotion disappeared entirely.

"Your Chakra residue was found in the premises. It was confirmed by the Hyūga," the third didn't look entirely convinced, and Anomie wanted to laugh. She wanted to cry. She wanted to scream.

The Hyūga. How convenient. She must have been on their list to be crucified since Tetsuna.

"I see," Anomie said slowly, and any fight Sarutobi might have found in the girl disappeared.

"You have nothing to say?" The elder to the third's right spoke up, and Anomie was certain that if he hadn't, she would have forgotten they existed.

"I see no point fighting a losing battle," she said, bowing her head. "I am a murderer. It's in your eyes. Nothing I say will change your mind."

"The suspicion is only the first step," Sarutobi spoke carefully. "Do you have any information that might plead your case?"

Again, the urge to laugh until she cried swallowed her whole.

"Nothing. Do what you must. The citizens must think that some action is going to be placed, otherwise they'll start believing they can do it themselves."

"You're taking this calmly...are you up to something else?" The elder's anger was weakly concealed in her voice. Anomie wanted to laugh again, but her eyes tore through the elder's scowl in so harsh a glare that the elder visibly retreated his accusation.

"Other than killing children," she barely contained the sarcasm. "Apparently not."

Sarutobi looked about ready to collapse on his desk by the time five Anbu appeared in a swift teleportation Jutsu, hands gripping Anomie's upper arms so tightly and yet she didn't so much as bat an eyelash.

"Just so you know..." She spoke up right when he thought she had given up. "More will die. Stripping me of my position won't do anything."

"Is that a confession of guilt?" One of the elder's voice's was harsh, but Anomie wasn't phased.

"I am guilty...of many acts that you privileged and avaricious old men would find deplorable, but I have never shied away from this guilt and I've admitted to every last one. I have redeemed myself of every one of my crimes and bled for this village. I will not admit to something I did not do." The elders were silent, having not expected such bold words from a woman who usually drank insults and criticism like a poison in her tea.

And Sarutobi believed her. Something in her eyes told him that he didn't make a mistake when he made her a ninja. Something in her eyes told him that she wasn't the killer they all thought she was- maybe she was a killer, but in no different a way than any one of them.

But what was he to do when Hyūga and Uchiha both wanted her head?

»»⎯⎯⎯¤⎯⎯⎯««

It was odd. Only when she lost it, did Anomie realize just how much being an Anbu meant to her. It was a special bond that made it feel like her ribs had been pulled out when it was taken away.

Killer.

Monster.

They were odd words, written on the door to her apartment. She didn't know how long she stared at them and she didn't know how long the rage bubbled in her mind.

"This is what happens when you pretend to be the bad guy... " Kakashi's voice wasn't scolding or cruel, but they pierced a small hole in her psyche. She glanced up, finding his form leaning over the railing of his apartment balcony, his eyes trailed away from the script of his book and to her form. In a mere instant, he was next to her, his book nowhere in sight, "...people misunderstand your intentions."

At his comment it became difficult to ignore and repress the slight bubble of anger at the scraping and messy red script of 'murderer' on her door.

"People will misunderstand no matter what you do, Kakashi." Anomie's voice wasn't necessarily cold or cruel. She sounded almost tired instead. "People are stupid and ignorant." She placed her palm against the door handle, face emptying of emotion. "I don't care."

"You don't," Kakashi's brow rose into his headband, and Anomie glanced towards him. "Look at your hand."

In her palm, the door handle was crushed with the imprint of her fingertips. Even in this weakness, she was unable to loosen her grip. Kakashi's hand, almost hesitantly placed itself on Anomie's strengthened hold, for a moment, the anger in her eyes dissipated.

"It's okay to care." He murmured.

Her eyes instantly narrowed and any mood that was created was immediately cast aside when her darkened stare landed on him. "You don't know anything. Caring is a weakness."

"Then you are weak," Kakashi's voice was low and soft, harsh, but his eye was empty to match.

"Why are you saying this? What do you-"

"I love you." Kakashi's words interrupted with such a hiss that Anomie's weakening resolve and softening gaze crystallized and disappeared. Despite the obvious retreat of the girl's emotion, he had never felt freer. And it was as the weight and realization of his confession had lifted a heavy burden off his shoulders.

So that was what she was...she was still that ember in his throat, and the closer he got to her, the more the warmth began to undo the barricade of ice around his heart.

"No. You don't," her silence stretched for an eternity before she spoke and her words felt like ice.

"Only I can decide that."

"No," she said simply.

"You don't just say no," Kakashi tried to keep the exasperation out of his voice, but the sound of it peaked in through it.

"You can't decide what I can and can't do," she glanced towards her door. "I am not sure what you expect from me, but-"

"I don't expect anything," his words made her glance his way as her head tilted to the side in a cat like motion.

"They always do," and in and instant her words were like broken shards of glass. "To be honest, maybe I am attracted to you. You are strong and confident, albeit less emotionally unavailable than I thought, but maybe that is my type." She smirked, taking a step closer and running her hand along his arm. It felt like static when she touched his skin and a trickle of annoyance caused his eye to narrow. "Maybe I should have sought you out that night instead of Genma." A spike of pain brushed his annoyance away.

How odd that one woman could make him feel so much all at once.

"Maybe...it would have been," she rose to the tips of her toes in so swift a motion that he instinctively leaned away before she could kiss him. Her lips perked in a smirk. "Electric. Hypothetical maybes. But do you know why I didn't choose you? Why your face didn't even cross my mind...?" In that moment, he knew she was on the defensive. He knew that her words would sting. "Because I don't love you. I barely even like you."

She leaned back in an instant, and he felt a stabbing pain push through his form with every breath.

"That's fine." He wasn't sure he even believed his own words, but something that crossed her face made him doubt the truth of anything she said.

Her eyes narrowed, and she made a motion to leave, ripping open the door. He knew that if he let her walk away, their bond would shatter into crumbles beneath their feet. Perhaps he always knew the thin wire they balanced on, and he wanted nothing more than to get to the end of their chase. She was no longer just Kougin Anomie, the girl that Rin would brag about nonstop during mission. She was no longer Koneko, the girl who could probably murder a village without shedding a tear.

No. She was just Anomie. The girl who gifted him with porn and held is hand and fell asleep on his shoulder. She was the girl who stole his food and snuck into his apartment at random hours of the week just to enjoy a bit of silence next to him. She was the girl whose hair smelled like melon and whose hands were always gentle when they pressed against his cheek.

Instinct drove him to grab her wrist and pull her back. The moment she turned, her face was contorted in annoyance, but didn't have the chance to speak when he gripped the back of her neck, barely remembering pulling his mask down. All he could think about were her lips, red as ever, pressing against his.

She pushed on his chest, but the moment he separated her eyes were so full of an emotion he had never seen. Those same hands that shoved him away were now pulling him into her face once more. She stepped back, almost subconsciously trying to get away as they entered her apartment.

She couldn't have chosen a worse way to explain what she wanted. She pushed with just as much force as she pulled. The sound of the door slamming with Anomie's back to it with such force that a loud crashing of a glass dish that once rested on the small table by the door now erupted on the ground. Pieces of glass crunched under their feet as Anomie's legs wrapped around Kakashi's waist in so tight a grip that he lost his breath.

"Stop," she mumbled in between kisses, and the moment the words left her lips, his movements halted so she was trapped in between him and the wall in silence.

His stare was so...gentle that she felt her hands quiver with the desire to touch him.

Violence...

She realized it slowly. She wanted to kiss him with so much violence that it hurt to resist.

She wasn't used to it, but it was like he was a magnet. She hated that the more she tried to push away the harder the force of the pull was.

A part of her mused the fact that if she wanted to, it could end with as simple a word as 'leave'.

It was so simple.

She knew it was simple.

Kakashi was a good man...probably better a man than she had ever been with.

But one word and that bond... that thin and brittle bond would snap.

That bond that coiled around her neck and choked the life out of her would disappear.

Her brows furrowed together, as she placed her palm flat against his face. His cheek was warm. Her other arm stayed wound around the back of his neck, propping her body against his and her back against the wall. "If you kiss me one more time..." Anomie slowly whispered, her eyes narrowed as his burned holes through her head and through her irises. "I think the world might explode." Everything was fire where he touched and it was a sensation she had never felt before.

"It seems so," he whispered back.

He didn't waste another moment. His head tilted to the side and he claimed her lips once more. Her hands shook as she pulled towards him, and if he could feel it, he didn't say. His lips were soft and smooth, and his touch sent shivers of warmth through her body. It was a heat so harsh that she felt sparks at every touch. After all the men she had ever been with, all the pleasure she was forced to feel, she had almost forgotten what it felt like to actually desire someone.

She had forgotten what it was like to want someone. She had forgotten what it was like to want someone to kiss her. This desire made her wither with a fear she had forgotten existed in her veins.

She waited no further, shoving him off her so violently that his back hit the hardwood floor. She smirked, quickly tearing off her shirt and climbing on top of him in so fast a motion that he barely had a moment to process that she had pushed him until her lips were covering his once more. He slightly chuckled into the kiss, and it was a sound so low and throaty that she felt her fingers shake as they ran through his hair. His fingers ran up her bare back, tracing over her bra and up her spine.

"Shh," she murmured with a giggle into his ear, and she felt him pull her underneath him and his hand run up her side. She ran her fingers up his face, tossing away the headband with so quick a motion in order to look into both his eyes. It felt odd, naked, to look at her with both, but the tightening in his chest was almost too much to handle as he pushed his lips back onto hers with a small smirk.

Her fingers were woven so tightly into his hair that he could feel its sting. Everything about her was so brash and forceful, and yet her lips were so soft and her skin was smooth and tight and cold.

Sadly, he wasn't nearly as experienced as her bra proved to be nearly impossible to get off.

He contemplated tearing it off, but the moment the thought crossed his mind, he felt her break the kiss, mid laugh.

It was a sound he had never heard from her before. A sound so raspy and gentle that he barely had time to breathe.

"I guess you can't be good at everything," she murmured into his ear. Her tone wasn't cruel or mocking, and it took him a moment to realize that she was teasing him in a way unlike she had ever done before. Flirting. Her lips traced his ear mid-giggle as her hands ran down his back, playfully lifting his shirt. "That's okay," she whispered and he felt her slightly nibble on his ear in a rather affectionate a manner.

She ran her fingers underneath his shirt and up his spine.

"I'll teach you."


Author's Note

Author's Note

PS: I still don't write smut.

I named this chapter アマリリスベラドンナ (Amaririsu Beradonna)

Amaryllis belladonna are also known as "Naked Ladies" because the greenery comes up in Spring then dies back, as it goes dormant for the summer. In late summer a naked spike that resembles a cobra emerges out of the ground and then pops open produces many blooms that are a soft pink color. They smell like bubble gum and last for a long time in the garden and make a great long lasting cut flower.

The pink flowers of this plant have a lovely smell but contain poisons that cause cardiovascular collapse.

I want to thank all the reviewers of the last chapter. It was really sweet and I appreciate it. I have been planning this moment for as long as when I made Anomie the leader of the assassination unit. It will be a significant moment in her character development, and we all know Kakashi needs to get laid. Aha...

Anyway, thanks for reading~ ^_^