Chapter 22

Anomie hated the smell of death. It was pungent and it tore through your nose with such force that even pressing a thick piece of cloth against your face wouldn't take the scent away. The smell was far worse than the sight. In her lifetime, she had grown immune to horrible sights. It was a sad reality that the blood and brains spilling out like a cracked egg no longer made her stomach drop in disgust.

The smell however, that is something that no one can get used to, and if any killer says otherwise then she could practically taste their lie.

That was the smell her own wound was beginning to transform into and Tobi's constant chatter didn't do anything to lessen her annoyance as the rain slushed against her back. She wanted to kill him so badly that her fingers twitched at her sides, and if the cloaked man could feel her bloodlust, he didn't say. She was just moments away from collapsing, but pride and her own paranoia kept her upright.

"Perhaps we should rest, An-chan." His suggestion came out in a muse and Anomie felt her blood run cold at the nickname.

"In the middle of nowhere, I think not," she retorted simply and she attempted to continue walking. She didn't feel comfortable resting in a place where her weaknesses were surrounding her every breath.

Tobi went silent, and she relished in that silence, knowing it was going to be short lived. She didn't waste another moment to continue walking through the trees. "You plan on walking through the land of grass and iron on nothing but your will power."

When he said it out loud, Anomie knew she was being stubborn and ridiculous, but the rain was beginning to wear her down and she grew fearful of every droplet that hit her. Slowly she turned towards him and her brows were furrowed in concentration as she stared into the shadowed hole that rested his eye. Her lips pursed before she closed her mouth.

"What do you have in mind?" She finally asked and she noticed that his body straightened in enthusiasm. She didn't trust his happy emotions when she was unable to see his eyes. She didn't trust when his voice rose in excitement when she was unable to see the curvature of his lips.

Simply put, I don't trust you.

"I could find a place for you to rest, An-chan," he stated with a happy grin as he lifted his head and his form towered above her so she was forced to look up to catch his eye. Although, she couldn't be certain where he was staring because the shadow and rain still restricted her vision.

"Don't..." She paused, don't call me An-chan, she stopped herself from saying the full sentence. Somewhere in her stomach, the reminder of Konoha still made her sick. "Fine...just..." She stopped her sentence and felt a rush of pain jab her in her stomach where the stab wound still resided. The throbbing was beginning to hurt more than the initial cut, and her thoughts began to drift from their coherent placement. Her tongue was dry from its lack of water and her body was beginning to grow clammy and pale.

Before she could topple over, his hands steadied her shoulders until she fell into his chest.

"I don't need your help," she whispered out, and just before she lost conscious, she heard his musing chuckle.

"You haven't changed, Anomie."

The sad part was, in her delirious and near catatonic state, she almost pictured Kakashi's arms around her back.

It was then that she realized the horrible sickness in the pit of her stomach wasn't pain.

It was guilt.

»»⎯⎯⎯¤⎯⎯⎯««

She awoke to the crackling of a fire, and the warmth of it felt nice when it brushed the side of her cheek. Fire was a welcoming change to the chill of the wind and rain on her back. She attempted to shift her body closer, but a stinging pain flooded through her insides without any warning.

She bit her bottom lip so hard that it drew a trickle of blood that spread iron smoothness along her tongue. Despite the coppery taste dripping over her lip, she merely watched the spread of shadows flicker over the back wall in the shape of the logs. The flames itself were brilliant, even without casting a mark on the wall.

It took her a long moment to realize that she was shivering violently in her spot, and she forced down the pain as she inched closer to the fire. It wasn't enough and she felt her shoulders shake with the cold that bit into her skin without any reprieve. The wound felt sore, but it wasn't the worst pain in her life and thinking about the other wounds made her feel a momentarily lapse of release.

When that Iwa ninja tore his Kodachi, still ripe with Ohashi's blood, into her shoulder and twisted just to see Anomie's face contort in pain. When she ran through smoke and fire for an hour with that same wound, using what was left of adrenaline and fear as she got past being raped twice and falling on that same shoulder with no mercy as she was knocked to the ground.

There was worse pain in this world, and Anomie refused to die by the cold. She would rather give the pain to yesterday if she could.

"You're awake," Tobi's tall and masked form rose a shadow over the cave as he knelt down next to the fire and placed some logs right next to it. Anomie almost immediately felt her shoulders tense, all previous shivers of cold disappeared as her face emptied of nostalgia and sadness as she ignored the sting when she sat up. She clutched her wound and glanced at him through thick bangs that swept over her eyes.

She wasn't sure what she was thinking when she thought it was a good idea for a ninja to have bangs.

"Where are my weapons?" She asked, immediately noticing that her tanto, that was once strapped to her upper thigh, just barely hidden by the bits of material that wrapped around her hips with the ropes that connected to her midriff in a belt – it was now gone from sight. The weapons pack that had once dangled underneath that decorative rope was now nowhere to be found and she felt naked when she realized that fact.

All her hair was loose at her shoulders, proving that the hairpins, sharp with blades at the end, were missing. She furrowed her brows, finding that at least her arm guards still rested just over her black gloves.

She could always activate a seal if things went cross, but she'd rather leave that for a last resort.

"It's dangerous to rest with so many weapons, An-chan," Tobi replied with a happy grin. "I was a good boy and removed them for you."

Her jaw locked and she found that even the blade she kept hidden in her arm guard, lining her forearm, was also missing. It was with calm amusement that she realized that this freak had frisked her quite thoroughly in her sleep. She glanced between him and the fire, tempted to burn his face in the ashes, but instead, her lips quirked into an amused smile.

"I'm going to ignore the disgust in my gut and instead ask where we are." Anomie said simply and he practically bounced all over the place as he knelt down close to her face.

"We are on the border between the land of Iron and Rice." He announced and Anomie nearly tipped over in surprise.

"That's not possible." She said simply, and he tilted his head to the side.

To get to the land of Grass would take a day at least, and that was if she were running. But to travel three countries east with her unconscious and injured on this man's back was impossible. She glanced behind him, and stared deep into the darkness of the outside world, noticing the luscious and rich grassy fields of the rain village were nowhere to be seen. It would take hours to get away from the eastern fields and the forest that surrounded the land of rain and the border of the village of Grass to the east.

But the outside of the cave, just barely visible through the flicker of flames, rested a dry plot of land, rocky like that of a mountainside. She thought back to her travels, remembering that the mountains were far to the west, past the hidden rain village south.

The only other place that held rocky mountains in this area was, as Tobi said, on the border of the land of Iron. Either direction would have been impossible to get to in so short of a time. To travel past the boundaries of a war stricken hidden village such as the Rain village would be impossible with an injured girl on your back. There would be no sneaking around it, as the Rain village had high towers and flat terrain. A Shinobi would be able to see someone as conspicuous as the two of them.

"You don't believe me," Tobi's voice was saddened and she felt her eyes slightly narrow as she stared at his rigid posture that remained so close to her form. "After all the work I took to get you here, aren't you going to praise and thank me?"

Somewhere down the line, it had become increasingly difficult for Anomie to let out a genuine sign of gratitude. "Where are my weapons?" She decided to ask instead, feeling her shoulders tense as she leaned in towards his face, her lips only a distance of millimeters away from his mask. It was in that moment, through the flicker of flames, that she was able to see the onyx color of his eye.

She examined it over and over again, and slowly realized that she had been correct. There was no amusement or laughter in his gaze. She only saw bitterness and darkness. The moment she saw it, he stood up with a joyous bounce.

"Scary, Senpai..." He said with a cute bounce in his tone. "I placed them in a pile for you," he stated simply, mere moments later.

Anomie glanced towards the pile, far from the fire and near the entrance of the cave, and found that a stack of hidden weapons rested.

"I bandaged senpai's wound, but healing arts aren't my specialty. Tobi is a good boy, so I made sure to get rid of any chance of an infection spreading," Tobi said happily, tapping on the bottom of his mask where his mouth would have resided.

Anomie had never developed the patience for medical Ninjutsu. In theory, with her perfect Chakra control, it would have been easy to master. However, it took too long and required a study of the human body and its systems and functions.

Anomie glanced down at her hands. Her hands just weren't made for mending broken bones and she had no right to learn.

Her body was only made to destroy.

"The Ninjutsu you spoke of and the secrets you promised," Anomie asked slowly, and she saw Tobi's shadowed eye glance in her direction without any hesitation. "What would you have us do in return?"

"Nothing worse than what you've already done, An-chan," Tobi said happily, and she wanted to scoff.

She had made the opening of the bingo book only days after she slaughtered Konoha's Anbu hit squad on her way out of the land of Fire. Perhaps that was the Hokage's way of helping her get on Orochimaru's good side, or perhaps the Hokage hoped that somehow, someone else would take care of the both of them. She for one was getting quite tired of assassination attacks on her life.

It was in that moment that she noticed her body was covered in that of a thick cloak with red clouds. She lifted it slightly to her hips and found the material was soft, and the bright red clouds were stitched in with skill.

She hated when her heart slightly warmed at the idea that a random stranger would shed his cloak for her. Perhaps she had spent too much time with criminals and the damned.

"Orochimaru is not a man easily swayed with words," she said slowly and glanced at Tobi, who had taken to roasting a marshmallow in the flames during her momentarily state of recollections.

She saw Tobi lift the marshmallow to the hole in his mask and saw him shove the short stick, marshmallow and all, into the hole.

She hated it, but for a moment she found herself forcing down a chuckle. It had been so long since she felt the desire to laugh, but something about the masked idiot made her feel on the edge of safety and mistrust.

"I think I did this wrong," came Tobi's echoed voice through his mask, but when he pulled the stick out from the eyehole, the marshmallow was gone and she watched a lump go down his throat when he swallowed.

She placed her head into her knees, her hair dropping over her bare shoulders. She hated in that moment that she had decided on an outfit so scantily covered with her sides bare and her back uncovered.

There was nothing to hide the shake of her shoulders when she laughed.

»»⎯⎯⎯¤⎯⎯⎯««

As it turns out, judging by the high mountains and coursing rivers that swelled through the opening of land, this was in fact the land of Iron. Anomie found herself even more confused how one man could travel such distance in a short amount of time, but decided that there was too much to the world of Ninjutsu that she didn't yet know.

"Senpai!" Tobi's voice rose in excitement, and it seemed to her that this man was a much better actor than she thought and he seemed to be growing into the role of this happy persona. The kinks and chips she saw in his speech were slowly starting to disappear and it seemed as if he made less mistakes around her. Before, she was certain that he wasn't what he seemed, and now, everything he did drove her further into thinking he was just a hyperactive idiot.

Said idiot jumped out near the clearing, rushing to the river where the waterfall merged from up above. He turned his form to her in a spin.

"Are we almost there yet?" He asked, and she felt her patience slightly ware thin. "Tobi will understand if you admit that we're lost."

"Trust me," Anomie said simply, annoyed that he would insult her navigation skills with such an innocent and happy tone of voice. "I wouldn't try and stall our time together by feigning false knowledge."

Tobi tapped his mask where his lips would be, which she noticed was a habit of his. "Senpai, where are you leading us then?"

Anomie felt a spike of pain in her abdomen when she took a step closer to the river and sat down. Her skin was pale and milky and her breathing was wavering. "Orochimaru has many hidden bases located in the north east territory of the land of Rice. I am not certain which base he resides at, and I don't plan on showing some freak where it is."

"An-chan," Tobi's voice grew sad. "I thought we were friends. Wasn't Tobi a good boy?"

"All offense intended, Tobi," Anomie retorted as glanced down at her top, it was styled like that of a one piece bathing suit with the sides slit open for easy movability (also, she liked wearing as little clothes as possible), and the top part was strapped to her skirt, tied in between the decorative rope that her weapons case hid under. She unstrapped it and lifted her top up past her waist, seeing the bandages around her abdomen had soaked through with blood again. "Loyalty is a rare occurrence in this world, and I don't trust you or your red clouded cult."

"We don't have enough members to be a cult," Tobi stated with an extra bounce in his step. "Tobi is a good boy, and he's really good with secrets."

Oh god he's talking in third person. Anomie thought with a grimace that was half caused by the pain in her side and the other half caused by the foreshadow of an annoying habit of his that she felt she was going to have to hear more often than she'd like.

"See," Tobi pulled out a jar the size of his hand from his cloak and she slowly turned her head to stare at him, noticing the jar had a piece of paper taped to it with the bright red crayon script of 'secrets' written on the front. "I keep all my secrets in here."

Anomie quickly noticed that there was only one and it was crumbled messily, resting at the bottom.

In moments she began to wonder if this asshole was toying with her or if he was actually so daft.

»»⎯⎯⎯¤⎯⎯⎯««

"Orochimaru-sama, this is-" Anomie didn't get a chance to answer as Tobi lurched forward in excitement to meet the legendary Sannin.

Obviously, the hyperactive boy wasn't expecting the bumpy surface, as his foot slipped on a crack and he fell stomach and face first into the walkway near Orochimaru's feet.

"I'm...sorry," Anomie mumbled, her cheeks reddening slightly as she glanced towards the side, as if she were waiting for the walls to swallow her up whole. "He's a representation of an organization that wants to recruit you..."

Orochimaru's eyes were sparkling with amusement as he raised a thin brow in the smoke prodigy's direction. "Him?"

"I didn't say he was a good ambassador," Anomie answered, forcing the humiliation down her throat so she wouldn't have to taste its bitterness on her tongue.

Tobi sprung up as if he came back from the dead and he rushed in front of Orochimaru before Anomie could restrain him. Slowly she felt her shoulders sag.

"You know what, I don't care anymore." She said, turning her heel. "He's all yours now, boss. Said secret Ninjutsu could be awaken with their organization's help. I figured you'd be interested."

"Still a spot for you too, An-chan," Tobi shouted and she paused, feeling a tinge of warmth in her heart form before it faded away.

The moment she exited the room, on-looking the maze of hallways, she sighed a breath of relief to get away from the overactive kid who had been shackled to her side for days.

She placed her hand to her stomach, feeling dampness through the thin material of her shirt. In her brief moment of silence, she found herself slightly surprised when a voice interrupted that lull. "I could heal that for you."

The voice made her lips lower into the smallest of frowns as she turned her head to the stone still form of Kimimaru. "You're even worse of a healer than I am."

His body was still pale, and his eyes held what looked to be reminiscent of bags from lack of sleep. Undoubtedly he decided to skip the comforts of his bed in order to fulfill his daily tasks for Orochimaru. Mission were always something to be expected from a man who wanted to know everything there was to know about Jutsu.

"Perhaps, but you are running low on options," he replied, and she stared at him for a long moment before unwrapping her bandages and unstrapping her shirt. She promptly lifted her shirt over her mid-riff, watching him carefully as his eyes scanned over the wound on her stomach, noticing the outline of bruising around the opening of parted skin.

He glanced towards her eyes, their gazes connected for a long moment.

"You stabbed yourself," he said slowly, and she blinked, cutting back the snarl that wanted to make itself known. She knew by the tilt in his head and the slight twitch of his lips that he found it amusing.

"Options were low," she answered back in retort. "Hurry up or I'll tear out a bone and shove it up your ass. It will bring about a new example of fucking yourself."

He slightly smiled before he raised his palms over her stomach and his hands slowly glowed green. His Chakra was warm and it brought about a tickling sensation to run down her arms and over her sides.

However, his Chakra control was weak and she noticed that it did little for the wound that just barely managed to bring the parted pieces of skin back together. She knew that the slightest bit of pressure would likely cause it to open back up again, but that was okay.

She wanted everything to hurt.

»»⎯⎯⎯¤⎯⎯⎯««

"You brought back quite a prize," Orochimaru's voice rang through her ears as he leaned over a giant wooden table; the scroll that Anomie had killed for was now opened. On it held diagrams and Jutsu in such a format that she knew only Orochimaru would be able to understand what they offered.

"I should hope so, as I discovered that rainy terrain is not my ally," Anomie stated with a slow shake of her head.

Orochimaru glanced up through the partition of black hair, and his eyes ran over her body before settling over the bandages just barely visible through the opening of clothing just over her sides. She noticed his lips form into a frown. "I thought as much." And you sent me anyway. Careful, Orochimaru, one might think you're trying to get me killed. "But you're the only one I would trust with something like this."

Anomie felt her heart slightly warm once more, chasing away the earlier sting of betrayal that she felt before. "What about Kimimaru?"

Orochimaru glanced up, "I trust you because you get things done efficiently, Fuyu-chan. Quick and easy with no mercy." Orochimaru slightly smirked. "Kimimaru wrecks carnage and his methods are noisy."

"One of the Hoshimozu mentioned something about a location," Anomie brought up after a moment, taking a step forward. "I have ransacked my head for an answer to what, but sadly I'm not very knowledgeable on this subject."

Greed flashed through his eyes, and he glanced back towards the scroll, "I wanted this to complete the final component of a Jutsu that I've been unable to perfect." He admitted, and Anomie tilted her head slightly to the side as her eyes ran over his face over and over again. "But the Hoshimozu are associated with another great clan that I'm sure even you have heard of in your years bedding for wealth."

"There are many names." Anomie said simply. "Many stories."

"Uzumaki." Orochimaru said simply as his lips curled into a forming smirk. "Surely you know of this story, considering."

"Considering what?" She asked, and he shook his head with a smile. "I know of it. The clan that was destroyed for power. Tragic. What about it?"

"Some survived and sought refuge all over the country. I, before now, only knew of one with the power of the Uzumaki. A boy with the power of a demon."

Anomie's brows furrowed, "you speak of the fox?" She hadn't known this sorrowful fact, but she should have expected as much. "The fox demon is heavily guarded. Day and night. There is no getting close to him."

Orochimaru's lips curled into a wider smirk, "I've found that there is little places you are unable to travel."

Anomie bit her bottom lip hard enough to feel the burn. "What makes you target the fox boy now?"

Orochimaru ran his hand over the scroll as if it were gold, "this Jutsu I covet requires a Uzumaki touch. Fūinjutsu is complicated and requires time and energy that I covet. This scroll holds much knowledge and potential, including a information of a Uzumaki refuge in Kusogakure."

"If there is access to Uzumaki in Kusogakure, what is the purpose of the nine tailed fox?" And the very same fox that got Saru killed.

Of course, that had been the masked man's doing, and there were nights she stilled remembered the way his blade shined and glimmered as it tore through her mentor's throat.

"The truth is," Orochimaru said with a shrug. "I have access to Uzumaki blood quite easily, but I covet the fox boy for a different reason."

"What could that be?" Anomie asked.

"The Akatsuki were quite the group in the Rain village so long ago," Orochimaru admitted.

"You've heard of them?"

"I figured they'd try and recruit me, so I'd like to get something they want...as leverage."

Anomie lips pursed. "What could they want with a demon child?"

"That much is not my concern. I covet the blood of the Uzumaki clan and I am unable to decipher the location of the refuge, and in the meantime," Orochimaru paused, glancing towards Anomie's awaiting expression. "I suppose sending you to Konoha would pass the time."

"You want me to bring the brat here?"

Orochimaru let out a dark chuckle, "While I'm sure that you taking care of a child would be an interesting show, I would rather not inflict Konoha's wrath on me so quickly. I don't need a demon child wondering around, inflicting chaos. I want to make sure this kid can't prove to be a problem."

Orochimaru walked forward until he was in front of her, and in moments, he gripped her wrist and turned it over so her palm rested flat in front of him.

"I want a fail safe plan," he commented. "Just in case this Akatsuki proves to be a problem or if this demon comes to be a problem then I'd like to make trouble for them in that near future."

His fingers traced over the tattoo over her wrist, the same marking that had burned over the seal that had rested her Chakra in dormant. It still left a reminder that Orochimaru could steal away her life force and her Jutsu.

"What do you have in mind?" She asked and his eyes snapped up to meet hers.

"I want you to make it difficult for this kid to activate his Chakra."

"Fūinjutsu? What do you have to gain from such actions?"

"I developed a new seal, and I'd like to test its strength on the host of the most powerful of demons."

"What do you have to gain?"

"Knowledge. Uzumakis are unique in their ability to rejuvenate their Chakra and their life force. Simply put, I want to develop a seal that can counteract that and disrupt their natural ability to distribute Chakra. At its strongest state, in theory, it would be able to control a demon."

"And the Akatsuki want to collect demons?" Anomie asked, finally understanding his order. "They are collecting demons...that is what they desire from us?"

"Their motivations aren't my concern, but if they become a problem with their power, I'd like to have an attack available for retaliation."

"And you covet the Uzumaki clan as well?"

Orochimaru's chuckle deepened. "I covet everything, don't you remember, Fuyu-chan?" His fingers slid over her cheek.

"Teach me the seal you wish for me to perform," she stated in return, feeling the burn of his touch against her skin. "I'll do whatever you need."

»»⎯⎯⎯¤⎯⎯⎯««

She just wished his needs hadn't brought her back to Konoha.

Somewhere in her heart, she had hoped to never set foot in this village again, and yet here she was, standing on the walls of the very place she had betrayed. It was just as well and it wasn't as if she could run from her crime forever. It wasn't as if she could run from her guilt forever, and off in some corner of this village still rested a memorial stone with names carved on with the aid of her blood soaked palms.

But she had little care for a stone in the distance. She only had eyes for the fox demon that currently swung his body back and forth on a swing. His feet kicked the dirt, rising dust in the air. There wasn't much else left for her to do but watch as his eyes remained down casted into the dirt.

Somewhere in the distance, an Anbu ninja watched over him and she knew that she'd have to add to her crimes by stealing their breath.

It felt like strong hands were gripping her shoulders tightly and dragging her down into hell when she recognized a small dog, Pakkun, nudge into the fox's leg, dragging his nose over that demon's skin in a manner so affectionate and soothing that the demon picked the dog up and his blue eyes sparkled with a bit more life.

Of course it'd be you, Kakashi.

Author's Note

タマリクス (Tamarikusu) in English is a Tamarix. It means guilt or a crime. It is also called a salt cedar tree, as these flowers normally rest on thin branches :D

I couldn't realistically find a way to include Kakashi in this chapter, as to me, pacing is an important part in telling a story and sometimes it's ignored to throw together a couple. I wanted to advance the plot before I advance the romance, since sometimes I ignore one to improve the other. I'm trying to do both. As much as I wanna force them to sit down and clear some misunderstandings, I can't :D

Well, I mean, I CAN, but then it'd sound weird.

Anomie: I'm sorry. I actually really like you. Also, I killed our people in front of you, but I have a really good reason.

Kakashi: SO DESU KA? HONTO? I LIKE YOU TOO.

I'm sorry for the mocking of Japanese right there. I'm sleepy.

Anyway, thank you for reading and I want to say that I really appreciate it. The truth is, I'm so unsure about this story sometimes. My liking for it sometimes disappears completely and I just think, this story is really crappy why do people read it and then I get embarrassed of its existence. Other times I'm just like, I'm the the next best thing in this fanfiction world, everyone should love my writing.

I feel like a lot of writers get that way with their work, and the reason I bring this is up is because your guy's comments are actually what keep this story going when I'm feeling really self-confident. I actually reread some of them sometimes and kind of tear up cause I appreciate them so much.

The reason I am bringing this up now, is cause I've hit an all new low with my self-confidence of this story so reading old comments really help me get out new chapters.

Thank you for everyone who shared their opinion and gave me constructive criticism without being a jerk about it. I hope you all continue to support me in the future.