I do not own 'The Hunger Games' or anything related.


A resistance? It sounded like a fantasy. It was too good to be true. A spontaneous protest was one thing, but an organised resistance organisation? I knew of course from years of being in the capitol that not everyone was satisfied with bread and circuses in exchange for their freedoms. If they were, we wouldn't have the avoxes. But still….And the fact that District 13 had not been destroyed, but had survived all these years? A part of me still hadn't ruled out that it was a trick. What I was more concerned about however, was what Plutarch said about Katniss.

"She may try to run. Or fight back."

Running is certainly something that Katniss might be planning on, if she knew that her attempt to calm down the districts had indeed failed. No doubt that she would try to flee to the woods beyond the fence. And not just her. She was sure to bring her loved ones with her, and their loved ones. So who would be on that list? Her sister and mother definitely. Peeta, of course, and his family. Her friend Gale and his family as well. Me? I'd like to think that I would be on that list, despite the fact that we rarely get along, even though there was no way that I would, unless they discovered some way to make some sort of alcohol out of the resources in the woods. I couldn't get through without it. Who else would not want to leave? Her sister would certainly want to follow her, and her mother, although would be reluctant, would want to stick with her daughters. Peeta would definitely want to join Katniss, although I doubt his family would want to leave their moderately comfortable lives for the wilderness. Gale would also be willing to go into the woods, and his family…. To be honest, I knew very little about them to make any kind of assessment. Come to think of it, I knew very little about Gale as well! I knew he was Katniss' hunting partner and friend, and that his family relied on him for support the same way Katniss's did. I also heard some things while in the Hob about being Katniss's cousin, but that only seemed very recent and I had a feeling it was something made up by the Capitol documentary on her because he seemed too handsome compared to Peeta. So if Gale's family were as dependant on him as Katniss's were on her, then they were sure to come. So sure, a lot of them would go with Katniss, but the other important question is how well would they cope. Katniss will have no problem surviving, having been there on a regular basis. Gale would also cope. Their families I had a feeling would struggle, especially their mothers, (And I thought of Katniss's sister Prim and how she would prefer to help an animal rather than kill it), but would rely on Katniss and Gale. But what would happen when the day came when they were too old to hunt, or died? Peeta, although from what I saw in the Arena would prove helpful, was not quite the hunter and forager Katniss and Gale were. And I also thought what would happen when Katniss made her choice between Gale or Peeta, and the rift that would erupt because of that.

Anyway, what kind of a life would that be for them? A life of freedom, sure, free from the tyranny of the Capitol, and a life of having as much food as you like. But where were they supposed to live? Going in there and coming back was one thing, but to actually live there? Were they supposed to live in tents for the rest of their lives, and what happened if it or the sleeping bags got torn, how were they supposed to mend it? I still remember what it was like, sleeping in the arena, the terror I felt towards the numerous animals that would be out to get me, and I was only able to get sleep afterwards because one of us was on watch. I don't think Katniss had truly considered the threat the different animals would have. Mel was the same. Oh sure, they were nothing to them but what about others? Also what would happen if someone got sick, and they weren't able to cure it? There may be plants with medicinal properties in the woods but what about the medicine in civilisation? Living in the woods would be like living in the arena for the rest of your life without any gifts from sponsors, and not just your life but for your family, your children, and their children and so forth. I also thought about how the District would suffer without Pheena, how the seam depended on her for help, even more so now that her daughter is a victor. I also thought that when she leaves, the Capitol will capture anyone connected to her and Peeta to interrogate, even kill.

No, the best thing would be to keep them in District 12. I didn't need Plutarch to tell me to do that, resistance or not, real or not, District 13 or not.

But fight back? Somehow I couldn't see Katniss doing that. Her old man certainly, but Katniss had always struck me as more of a survivalist, someone who does whatever it took to stay alive. Well, apart from the moments where she volunteered in her sister's place, or all those times she risked her life to save Peeta, but that itself was a form of survival, protecting the person you couldn't survive without. Hmm. So whether she loved him or not, Peeta was definitely someone Katniss couldn't bear life without.

It was times like these I wish that Ray was still around. I know I complain about her a lot, but she was helpful, in her way. Even if I didn't realise it at the time. Like when she invited me into her home after coming back from the apothecary. I followed her into the kitchen, where she took out from the cabinet a bottle and placed it on the table, with a glass next to it.

This was her idea of something that would be more effective than the medicine I got from the Apothecary.

"No," I said straight away.

"Trust me, boy, you're going to need a lot of this in the coming weeks so you might as well start-"

"I said no!" I shouted, "I will never drop a drink of alcohol in my life!"

"I've told you before not to make promises you can't keep-"

"Well this one I intend to! You think I want to end up like a sad drunk like you, or all the victors who make fools of themselves on television, or at the hob, or end up like my old man-"

"Watch your tongue," She snapped, "That's your father you're talking about!"

"Oh, is that what he was?" I laughed, "Tell me, does a father waste all his money for his own benefit what should go to his family? Does a father beat up his wife and kids?"

Raybearta looked shocked. I turned around and got out of there as quickly as I could.

I didn't realise it at the time, but Ray knew that I would need a lot of alcohol after a couple weeks from then on. As well as prevent me from making any promise I couldn't keep.

She was also right about the medicine. It helped, but it didn't really stop the nightmares. The medicine from the doctors was a bit more effective, but also was unable to cure me of my pain, like cooling a burn wound in water or using burn ointment on a sword wound. It soothed it, but didn't really repair the damage.

It also didn't help that my continued trauma was affecting my relationships. Rachelle suggest that she could stay over one night, and we could share the room. Her parents let me know that they were okay with that. Me being a victor had greatly improved my standing, now that I became the most suitable match. In fact, if Rachelle wasn't still at school they would probably ask me about our wedding date. However, I was still shaken over my attack on Larie the other night, and I'd never forgive myself if I ended up hurting her. However, I didn't want to tell her what I did, so I just tried to make excuses, saying that maybe it's best we wait for a couple of years. When she tried to tell me that there was no point waiting, I eventually ended up snapping at her.

"I SAID NO!"

That did not go down well.

"Maybe you'd be more willing with Maysilee Donor!"

And with that she walked out of the room and slammed the door.

It also didn't help that my family was worried about me, that they could still hear my screams at night, and would go in and help me if I just kept the door unlocked. Didn't they remember what happened last time? Not to mention when anything throughout the day triggered my experiences in the arena, and I was back there. Eventually, the two held an intervention of sorts for me, Ma telling me that they know that I haven't been the same since I came back from the Arena and that it broke her heart that I shut them out, and that it would help me and them if I just talked about it. But how was I supposed to tell them how I felt? I was the man of the house; it was important that I remained looking strong in front of my Ma and little brother. And I couldn't exactly show that kind of weakness in front of them or Rachelle, either. Actually, there was one person I could talk to, if I was to talk to someone about it, if it will help.

"I need some fresh air."

Ignoring my family's protests I walked out of the front room and outside.

"Haymitch, wait!"

I turned around. Larie had followed me.

"I – I know that you feel that you need to look tough for our sakes. But I also know how awful it is, keeping this kind of stuff to yourself, that you don't want to upset other people-"

Now this was too much. I loved my brother, but I did not appreciate getting talked down to, as if HE was the older brother. I laughed.

"What's so funny?" He asked.

"You were man of the house for what, like a couple of weeks and already you act as if you have all the answers-"

"I had to, YOU WERE NEVER COMING BACK!"

Larie seemed stunned when he said this.

"I – I didn't think you were coming back."

What he said shocked me.

"What? Bu-but LArie, I told you I would be-"

"Oh what? That you'd only be gone for a while? That once you got back we'd have so much money we wouldn't know what to do with it? You actually think that I believed that? You really think I'm that stupid?"

"No, of course not-"

"Ma believed you would, or at least, she had more faith than I did, but even she thought you were done for when you were stung by that butterfly, or when it looked like you were bleeding to death from that deer or when you collapsed at the end! And all that time I did my best to comfort her, telling her it would be all right, when all I wanted was for her to hug me and tell me that! But I couldn't! I couldn't let her know how much I was going to miss you, and made sure that when I cried myself to sleep every night she wouldn't hear me!"

But he was in tears right now. I was stunned when he told me this. I looked at him closely for the first time since I got back, and realised that he was no longer the little brother I knew, how much he forced himself to grow up, how much pressure he put on himself. I never meant for him to do that. When I told him not to cry before I left, when I told him to be the man of the house, I said that for his sake. And no, of course I didn't think he was stupid. I still saw him as a little boy. I also felt a pang of guilt. When I faked my dying in the arena, I wasn't thinking about what I put my family through. My only concern at the time was me and Maysilee surviving.

"Listen, Larie, about what happened with the deer-"

"I know you only did what you had to to survive. I'm not trying to make you feel guilty. I'm just saying how awful it was for me to keep everything to myself, then it must be a hundred times worse for you!"

A hundred doesn't cover it. I know what Larie was saying was trying to help, but surely then he must know why it's crucial that I can't express myself anymore than he could!

Even though I never wanted him to do that….

I continued to walk away.

"Haymitch! Haymitch, I'm sorry, Haymitch! HAYMITCH!"

At that point I started running, even though Larie continued to call after me. Until I was sure I had lost him. I felt guilty doing that. Which was why it was important that I find him and talk to him before I go back home. He probably hadn't left yet. I found him in the square.

"Mel!"

Mel looked confused to see me.

"Mitch? Is everything alright?"

For a moment, I didn't know what to say.

"Are you going on your walk?"

That was code for Mel going into the woods whenever other people were around.

"Well, yeah, before it gets dark."

"Mind if I join you?" I asked before I fully realised what I was asking.

Mel raised an eyebrow, for good reason.

"Really? You want to join me on my walk? Despite what happened last time?"

Last time. It was last summer. It was when he told that that he was off on one of his walks and I told him I didn't know how he does the things he does on these walks of his when he stopped and turned to me.

"Do you – want to join me?"

I don't know why he was looking at me as if I was turning down attending a victor celebration when District 12 was the victor! Venturing into the woods might be some huge adventure for him, but there is a reason why none of us go, even without-

I accidentally bumped into someone. There was a large crowd in front of me. I checked my hands, to see which time period I was in. It looked like I was in the present. For a moment I wondered if I had finally lost my grip on reality, on time, that the different stages of my life had suddenly come together. Because there is only one reason why people would be gathered in the square like this. But that was impossible. There were no more floggings. There hadn't been for almost a quarter of a century. The peacekeepers had basically abandoned it, more concerned with getting rare food in their bellies rather than keeping order. Besides, no one would do anything worth flogging, and those that do know the proper procedure to avoid it.

Pushing through the crowd I saw Darius the young peacekeeper lying unconscious on the ground, a large, purple bump protruding from his forehead. My eyes followed up from him and-

The stand had indeed back. A symbol of the Capitol's terror.

I could still see him hanging from there. Mel, his hands tied to the post.

But it wasn't Mel who was tied to the post in the present.

It was Katniss's friend Gale.