A/N: Sorry for the late chapter, everyone! Work has kept me super busy plus I've been working on a small poetry book I'd like to publish this year (fingers crossed) and then the cold I kept dodging finally got me but alas, this chapter is done!
I am also half way done with a chapter for The Cosmos but I keep getting stuck on how I want to write it out so it's taking longer to update it than anticipated.
As for the last chapter goes, I chose Barb not to notice that Lana was pregnant because I just live for the drama lol
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THIRTY-SEVEN
Plucky Chickens
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His coos and short little squeals easily distracted Lana as she tried to concentrate her thoughts into coherent words. She had been writing her memories of Briarcliff down as best she could on her typewriter. Click. Click. Click. It had been so for weeks since her boy was born. It was such a common sound that Johnny grew used to the sound and would nap straight through it. Lana had used writing as an outlet to the postpartum depression that had rocked her savagely since her son was born. Writing made her feel sane and normal. It helped her feel grounded and calmed the feelings raging inside.
On that July afternoon, Johnny was wide awake, laying in his bouncer which Lana had set upon Oliver's desk to keep an eye on him as she wrote. Johnny followed Lana's face with eyes so blue they left his brown eyed parents bewildered and surprised. He kicked his little legs, lips turning into a small smile that widened when Lana met his gaze. Johnny Allan was turning into quite the beautiful baby boy. At three months old, his little chunky thighs were settling in just right and his cheeks were as squishable as could be. But it was those big blue eyes that caught glances the most whenever his father took him to the doctor for check ups.
"Hi, Little Chicken." Lana smiled sheepishly at him, "What are you doing? Hm?"
Johnny's smile widened even more, showing his gummy grin and kicked his legs. So far his hair had stayed as dark as Oliver's and his eye lashes seemed to go on for miles.
Motherhood for Lana had been messy and challenging. It had been hard yet rewarding. Tears had definitely been shed on both ends and Lana discovered a new sense of vulnerability she had not known before. She felt as if she and Johnny were learning life together.
And that was okay with her.
Lana grabbed his little barefoot. He wore a white onesie for the weather was warm enough. She ran her thumb gently through his toes and Johnny squirmed, letting out a high pitched squeal. "Ticklish." Lana spoke the word Oliver had used out loud. She laughed lightly, "Ticklish, aren't you?"
Johnny squirmed in his bouncer and whined, kicking his little foot out of Lana's grasp. He seemed to have a little temper. Lana looked back to her work and sighed. Writing about the events in Briarcliff had been a challenge but in some ways it had been therapeutic for her. She was starting to see that the past could no longer hurt her. If only little by little.
"I guess this will have to do for today. Your majesty calls." She said to herself, referring to Johnny. She stood to her feet and plucked the baby out of the bouncer. "You're getting hefty, aren't you?"
Johnny was more than happy to be in his mother's arms. Or his father's. Nevertheless, Lana wasn't sure who Oliver spoiled more. He truly had been living in heaven ever since she said yes to marrying him and their boy was born. And for Lana, life was just that. Heaven.
However, there were moments while the baby slept that she felt restless. She turned on the television and watched the news and wondered about her old life. She wondered if they missed her at work, if they wondered what had happened to her. If they had bothered to look for her. She had so many questions about her past and yet Lana knew it be best to keep looking forward.
Lana took Johnny into the living room and slowly meandered to the window by the door. The neighborhood was alive that afternoon. The children were out of school and playing in the streets. They ran around on their bikes, climbed the trees in their yards and kicked a ball back and forth. Fathers cut the lawns of their homes or washed the cars on the driveway while mothers swept the porch or worked in the gardens. Life seemed so calm, so simple.
And yet, Lana still grew nervous about stepping out into the world. Oliver wasn't home and she missed him while he was away. Still, she felt restless and the postpartum feelings had begun to eat her inside out.
Johnny made a little sound, bringing Lana out of her stupor. She nestled him closer to her chest. "Maybe someday I can take you out for a nice stroll." She told him. Her eyes glanced over to his pram waiting by the front door. "Sooner or later."
Unable to be indoors any longer, Lana decided to take Johnny out for some fresh air. She opened the front door and stepped out onto the porch where she took a seat on the top step and sat Johnny on her lap. He squinted his eyes at the brightness of the day but they were safe under the shade of the porch.
Judy came out onto the porch, bright eyes alert. She went up to Lana and sniffed Johnny's little feet. Johnny's little mouth opened in what appeared to be a grin and squealed, excited to see Judy. He thought she was the most fascinating thing he had ever seen thus far. Even more fascinating than his own feet.
Lana smiled, "Is that Judy? What's she doing?"
Johnny kicked his little feet, ticklish by the feeling of Judy's cold little nose. Judy rubbed her head against his feet and then sat back and watched the children out on the street. Her tail lazily swished back and forth.
Lana gazed down the street. She had been brave on her walks and had made it to the corner but now with Johnny outside of utero, she was nervous to take him far from the safety of their home.
Even though life felt like heaven, there were still things Lana wished. She wished she wasn't afraid of taking her baby out for a walk. She wished she wasn't terrified of joining him and his father on his appointments with the pediatrician. She also wished the guilt of it all wasn't so overwhelming.
She kissed the top of Johnny's head, inhaling in the precious scent of his hair.
"Car!" Lana glanced up one an older boy called out and all the children cleared the street. A blue car then slowly drove past on its way down the street. Lana watched it go, the curiosity growing within her.
"I used to drive a car, you know." She told Johnny and Judy. "I drove a car and had a job." She placed her finger on Johnny's palm and watched as he grasped it tightly. He was so strong for such a small baby. "I bet I could still drive a car…" She watched the car stop at the corner and make a right turn. "And take you to the park and to school when you're old enough."
The children continued back to the middle of the street and continued to play.
"Hmph." She frowned to herself. She may have forgotten how to drive a car but she hadn't forgotten her pluck, "I bet I could."
Wendy parked the car and took a moment to herself. Her hand gripped the wheel tightly and she wondered if she was doing the right thing. It had taken her weeks to gather up the courage to do something with what Barb had told her. At first she declined to believe her but with the passing days Wendy began to doubt that Lana was still at Briarcliff.
Barb wasn't one to lie or make up stories and she sure as hell wouldn't confuse Lana with a stranger. Not to mention the fact that the man Lana was with sounded awfully familiar to Wendy. What if that doctor had gotten her out? But where would Lana go? Her family had disowned her and none of her friends even knew where she was.
Wendy just had to find out.
She turned off the car and stepped out, looking up at the grand building that was Briarcliff Manor and took in a deep breath.
"My deepest apologies, Ms. Peyser but unfortunately Ms. Winters is no longer with us."
It took Wendy a moment to fully understand the words spoken out of the nun's mouth. She sat in Sister Jude's office, across the desk from her. There was a cross on the wall and the smell of incense was strong. It covered the strong pungent smell of the sick and the mentally insane that lingered through the halls. She could hear their screams and wails as she made her way up what Sister Jude called the stairway to heaven.
"No longer with us?" Wendy questioned, unsure of her choice of words. "Did she- did she get out?"
Sister Jude pressed her lips together firmly in thought. Her brown eyes downcast upon her desk. "No. Sadly, our beloved Lana Banana passed."
Wendy's face contorted in deep confusion, "Passed? Are you saying Lana died?" Her voice rose a couple of octaves, still truly unable to process what she was hearing.
Sister Jude nodded firmly. "About a year ago. She caught the sickness and there was nothin' we could do."
Wendy frowned. She felt her heart shattering in her chest but she knew that couldn't be. Not if what Barb said was true. Her eyes stared hard at Sister Jude but the nun's expression was firm and unwavering and yet there was something in her eyes that gave a sense of nervousness, as if she was hiding something.
Wendy shook her head, "I don't believe you. Lana can't be- she can't be dead. Why wasn't I informed?" Tears were forming in her eyes and slowly breaking free. She knew it was a lie but hearing it still broke something inside of her.
Sister Jude gave out an amused chuckle, "My dear, ya told us yerself ya would no longer be visiting Ms. Winters. We simply assumed ya no longer cared to hear about her well being- or lack thereof."
"And her doctor?" Wendy questioned.
Jude frowned, "What doctor?"
Wendy didn't want Sister Jude to know that Dr. Thredson had come to her home with the intention of saving Lana from Briarcliff. He must have had a good reason for doing so if he went without Sister Jude's knowledge which was the impression Wendy was getting in that moment. Wendy knew she couldn't trust Sister Jude; the nun was not being fully honest with her.
Wendy sniffled and backpedaled a bit, "Wasn't a doctor assigned to her case? A Doctor Thredson?"
Jude paused and her expression hardened even more. "Dr. Oliver Thredson left Briarcliff's services about a year ago. We have not heard from him since." Her gaze averted, "Besides, Dr. Thredson was not truly assigned to her case. How did ya know-"
"Where is she buried?" Wendy interrupted Sister Jude before she finished asking her question. Of course Wendy stopped seeing Lana long before Dr. Thredson was assigned to her. Sister Jude would have questioned Wendy's knowledge of him and she had. So Wendy pressed other matters that would distract her.
Sister Jude looked surprised. She had not been expecting that. "Our dearly departed are taken to a cemetery in another location."
"Where?" Wendy pressed.
It was all making sense now. All the lies. All the excuses. Everything.
"Ms. Peyser." Jude spoke louder now. "May I remind ya that Ms. Winters' soul was suffering greatly. So much so her earthly body could not bear it." She slowly rose from her seat and placed her hands upon the desk, leaning closer to Wendy, her fiery stare locked on hers. "She found forgiveness in our Lord's arms. So I suggest ya leave sleepin' dogs lie and leave her soul to rest."
Wendy left Briarcliff without another word, quickly before Sister Jude gave the order for her to take Lana's place. She turned on her engine and peeled out of the property as fast as she could. If she wanted answers, she had to find the doctor.
Oliver was jolted awake that night by a grueling nightmare. He sat up in bed and turned on the lamp in his nightstand. Lana was still sleeping soundly at his side and little Johnny was in his cradle. Judy was perched at the foot of the bed by Lana's feet. Her lemon drop eyes looked at Oliver.
Oliver sighed and ran his hand through his hair. He had dreamt of Briarcliff. In his dream he could hear Johnny screaming through the hallways; Oliver ran down every corridor but could not find the boy. He carefully stood from the bed as to not wake Lana. It was a miracle she was actually sleeping while Johnny slept. She was either awake to feed him or to keep an eye on him. Oliver knew she still had nightmares even though she no longer admitted it.
He went to the cradle where little Johnny was sleeping. Oliver looked at the clock on the wall and knew he would wake shortly to be fed. Just like clockwork, little Johnny began to stir. Oliver gently picked him up and took him out of the room before Lana woke.
Lana usually breast fed Johnny. She had trouble doing so at first; there were so many things she had struggled with but after a few days there were no issues. He had been bottle fed before but did prefer the comfort of his mother so Oliver wasn't surprised when Johnny gave the bottle a little fight.
He sat with the boy on the recliner in the living room. "Shh, shh, there little buddy. Let Mama rest tonight." He spoke gently to Johnny who looked back at him with a tiny little frown, angry that he was being kept from his mother, if only for a moment. Johnny was still so young but his personality was already showing. He was going to be a very rambunctious little boy, Oliver already knew.
Alas, Oliver was excited to watch him grow and change into the little person he was meant to be. He had faith that he and Lana would raise him to be a good and loving boy. He wouldn't have much family around but he would have enough to be happy. And that's what Oliver wanted most for his son, for him to be happy. Hell, maybe he would have a big family with multiple siblings. It wasn't a subject he and Lana hadn't talked about but the future held so many possibilities. Lana was bettering herself day by day. She was showing her strength and her pluck and moving forward despite the atrocities life had dealt her.
So much was possible.
Once Johnny settled with his bottle, Oliver smiled softly. Fatherhood had been more than he had dreamt. It had been difficult at moments and terrifying to say the least. Oliver had no example of a decent father figure in his life but he was sure as hell determined to be one for his son.
Once Johnny was fed and changed, Oliver placed him back in his cradle where he fell back to sleep without any issues. Oliver climbed back into bed with Lana and wrapped his arm around her waist, bringing her body closer to his. He buried his face in her neck and inhaled the scent of her hair. After a moment, he kissed her bare shoulder blade and closed his eyes.
"Oliver…" Lana's sleepy voice spoke, "The baby…"
"He's fine." He answered, holding her to him. "He's safe."
He felt Lana take in a deep breath and then released it, slowly dozing off again. "Oliver?" Her voice was a soft whisper.
"Yeah?"
"Don't let me go."
