Hello Lovelies,
I'm sending lots of love and hugs to each and every one of you. We're living in scary times and we're all in the same boat. I'm praying that we all come out of this sooner rather than later.
I hope this chapter gives you some much needed escapism.
Much Love and Stay Safe,
Chelsea x
Paula White – Thank you! I'm glad you liked it. I hope you enjoy this chapter too. Much Love x
SuzB – Thank you! I love the Flynns, they really do take care of our beloved couple. I hope you're keeping well too. I'm fine, just taking each day at a time. Much Love x
Thankfully, the week ended on a much better note than it started on, the strain and intense stress from Monday slowly filtering into the distance.
Christian had been a lot calmer since his emergency session with Flynn, but more so after we agreed on a date for the wedding. Having something positive to focus on and look forward to was helping him. We had talked about his birth mother too, Christian sharing some of his anger with me, instead of directing it towards me.
He spoke at length and I listened to every word. He expressed himself and I comforted him. I held him close when he needed reassurance, and made him laugh when he needed something to smile about. I tried to give him what he needed, just like he gave me the strength and confidence to get up and face each day, back when all I wanted to do was stay in bed and hide from the world.
Today felt like one of those mornings, a buzz of anxiety swirling deep in my stomach as I stepped inside SIP.
Things were beginning to return to normal in the building, but an undercurrent of worry was lingering in the air. It was noticeable in rigid spines, raised shoulders and sly whispers. Everywhere I looked, I thought I could see a sideways glance firing my way.
Picking up the stack of paperwork I had sent to the copier, I turned on my heels and walked the length of the room, heading for my office. As I passed Maria's desk, I looked up and caught her eye.
"Problem?" she asked. Her tone was harsh and snippy, but was masked by a smile so fake it could have been made by Mattel. Her voice had drawn the attention of her nearby colleagues, meerkats springing up on the hunt for gossip. "Is there something I can help you with?"
"No, I'm fine."
It was obvious to anyone who happened to stumble across her that Maria Grisley was the type of woman who demanded attention. Craved it. Sought it out wherever she could find it.
Her hair was cut short into a jaw-length bob, full of rich honey tones, her natural colour nowhere to be seen. She was wearing thick-framed glasses that covered most of her face, but her eyes still beamed beneath them, courtesy of gold shimmery eyeshadow.
I stood there for a second, my stride faltering.
Am I intimidated by her?
No.
Do I think she's better than me?
Again, no.
But I am wary of her.
She's revealed herself to be two-faced, a trait I can't stand in people. I have no idea what lengths she will go to secure her position here.
I was under no illusion that she would happily throw me under a bus if it meant she could reign supreme.
"Would you mind sending over a copy of the notes you took from Wednesday's conference call?" I finally asked her, snapping out of my thoughts.
She narrowed her gaze and shrugged her dainty shoulders.
"I wasn't taking notes," she practically sang to me. She cocked her head to the side. "I assumed you were. I saw you scribbling something down in your notepad."
"You were supposed to be taking minutes," I shot back.
"Not me," she shook her head. "No one asked me to take the minutes… I'm sure if you ask nicely though, Joe or Andy might share their notes with you."
I pressed my lips together, biting hard on my tongue.
I remember specifically asking her to make notes.
"What were you doing in the meeting then, if you weren't writing anything down?" I countered, holding her stare. "What was the point of you even being there?"
"You'd have to ask Hamish, he's my boss. Not Mark and certainly not you," she smirked, adding her latter comment in a whisper. She rolled her chair closer to her desk and turned her attention to her laptop. "Now, if you don't mind, I've got work to do."
I seethed, continuing to glare at her, before I dragged myself away from her desk.
Back in the safety of my office, I slammed the door shut and stormed around my desk, dropping with a groan into my chair.
Bitch.
I closed my eyes and stole of a moment of peace, but was quickly disturbed by the sound of my iPhone blaring with an incoming call.
My scowl was soon replaced by a grin as I saw the caller's information.
I immediately accepted the video call, holding my phone up as Cal Hunter's face came into view.
"Steele," he grunted my name, his voice that deep gravel I had missed so much. "You free to talk or do you want me to call back?"
"No, I'm free," I nodded. "God, it's good to see you."
"Missed my gorgeous face, huh?" he sneered, dimples pinching at his cheeks.
It had only been a few months since I had last seen Cal, but it might as well have been years. He looked totally different to the stern-faced, perpetually pissed off man I had come to know and love. His dark hair was longer now, tucked behind his ears, his jaw dusted with a thin coating of stubble.
San Diego was clearly suiting him.
"Something like that," I laughed.
"Can't blame you. You tired of that miserable bastard yet?"
"Are you referring to my fiancé?" I arched my brow, but my grin remained proud on my face. "I'll never get tired of him."
"Shame…"
"I'll tell him you send your love, yeah?"
"Tell him I sent this –" He flipped the bird at the screen. "I'm sure he'll find the funny side of it. Eventually."
His wicked laugh filled the room. I simply shook my head at him.
Cal and Christian had never gotten along, the pair of them always butting heads and ribbing one another. I had glimpsed it in the short time I worked with Cal, but apparently it had been exactly the same since they first met several years earlier. As soon as Cal started working for Elena in her chain of seedy clubs, Christian had taken an instant dislike to him. I think it's because they are too much alike – both arrogant, confrontational, true alpha males. Things had taken a turn for the worse, however, when Cal found out about mine and Christian's relationship. He wanted to protect me. He knew there was a strong chance it wouldn't end well, not where Elena was concerned.
None of us could have predicted just how badly things would turn out.
Christian had softened towards Cal after the fire at Maîtrise. He was genuinely worried about him and the injuries he had sustained when the building collapsed under the heat of the flames. Christian knew how much Cal's friendship meant to me, and Cal understood that I had fallen head over heels for Christian. They agreed to make an effort for my sake.
After the fire, Cal decided it was time to get out of the club game. He had had enough and packed up his life here in Seattle, moving down to California to be with his younger brother. Christian paid for their apartment fees, and Trent and Cal's tuitions.
"Christian told me your big plans," I hummed. "Heading back to school?"
Cal nodded. "I start next week," he replied. "I'm studying Mathematics."
"Wow! That's great. Rather you than me though, numbers are not my forte!"
"Years of working behind bars means I'm good on the math front," he shrugged, playing down his skill. It was insane how quickly he could figure out sums that would take me forever to solve. Even with a calculator. "Especially before that evil bitch splashed out on fancy cash registers. I had to do all of it in my fucking head."
"Poor you," I pouted, mocking him.
"You had it easy, Steele."
"You call what I had to do easy? It was far from it!"
"Prancing around in those ridiculous heels, smiling at customers and handing over drinks? Piss easy," he frowned. "At least you didn't have to clean up the mess those dirty bastards made upstairs."
I shuddered at the thought.
"Anyway," I sighed, opting to move the conversation away from Maîtrise. That was firmly in the past. "Is there a particular reason you called?"
"Just wanted to check in with you," he shrugged again. He gave me a soft smile. "I got your message. About the wedding."
I messaged people earlier in the week to confirm the news. Cal was the only person who hadn't responded.
"We are going to send out real invitations," I said. "But I wanted to tell everyone early. In case you all start making other plans, you know?"
"You've chosen New Year's Eve," he reminded me. "Trust me, as long as everyone ends the night drunk or getting laid – or maybe both – you're gonna be fine. No one is gonna say no to a party."
"There's a bit of a difference between a party and a wedding," I chuckled. "But I appreciate the sentiment… you're definitely coming though?"
"Try to stop me," he snorted. "Are you serious? As if I'm going to miss the chance to see the mighty Christian Grey get hitched. I'm still shocked he fucking proposed."
"Is it really that hard to believe?"
"You don't know what he used to be like." Cal blew out his cheeks. "God, he was a bastard to everyone. He just wasn't destined for the settling down kind of life. He was a total loner. I don't know how you changed him."
"He fell in love with me," I shrugged. "It's as simple as that."
Cal faked a wretch. "Someone pass me a sick bucket," he groaned.
"It'll be you one day," I taunted him.
He hesitated, looking away from the screen. He pursed his lips.
"Do I get a plus-one?" he asked, quietly. "For the wedding?"
My brows shot up my forehead.
"Do you want to bring a plus-one?" I checked.
"Maybe," he mumbled. "I mean, no one wants to go to a wedding alone. Not unless you plan on screwing a bridesmaid, and I've already met your friend Kate and Grey's sister. Neither of them does anything for me."
"I'm glad to hear it!" I chortled. "And believe me, Christian will be glad to hear you have no plans to hit on his little sister!"
"Well? Can I have an extra invite?" he pressed on, desperate for the answer.
He was hiding something. This wasn't just a date.
Has he met someone special?
"Yes," I nodded. His shoulders dropped with relief. "You can bring a plus-one. But there's cell phones allowed. You'll have to hand them over upon arrival. We don't want anyone leaking pictures or information."
"Fair enough," he agreed. He smirked again, winking at me. "Has Grey mentioned getting everyone to sign an NDA yet?"
"He has," I sighed. "I'm trying to talk him out of it."
"Good luck with that!" he laughed. "I think I know how that conversation will play out."
I couldn't help but agree with him on that one. Christian is rarely a man for turning.
Cal scanned the space around me, peeking at the small glimpse of my office he could actually see.
"You at work?" he asked. I nodded. "How's it going? Still enjoying it there?"
"I am… It's going well… for the most part, anyway."
He gave me an arched look and I exhaled a deep sigh. I proceeded to tell him all about the problems at SIP and the ghastly Maria. I opened up my mouth and let the words tumble out.
"Shit…" he huffed when I had finished my ramble. "She sounds like a petty bitch."
"She is," I nodded.
"Is she there now?"
"Not in my office," I shook my head. I turned the camera towards the closed door. "She's out there."
"Open the door," he ordered. "I'll bring her down a few rungs, the fucking bitch."
I certainly wasn't going to do that.
"Ignore her," he offered instead, once he realised I wasn't going to unleash the force of Cal Hunter on her. "Just ignore her."
"That's a lot easier said than done!"
"For you, maybe," he shot back with a frown. "Steele, why are you letting someone like her get under your skin?"
"It's not just her though," I grumbled. "It's who she represents… I feel like I'm having to push myself harder than ever, to prove myself."
"Why?"
"Because my job could be at risk," I reminded him. "And I guarantee a lot of people here agree with her, thinking I'm only here because of Christian."
"And?" Cal grunted. "You don't have to prove yourself to anyone but your boss."
"I'm just worried," I huffed, shaking my head. I slumped back in my seat. "I love this place."
"I can tell," he said. "It took you a long time to get that job, too. But you can't give in to whatever childish games that chick wants to play. Let her be petty, rise above it. You're how old now?"
"Twenty-three."
"Act like it," he nodded once. "And if you're that concerned about your job, why don't you ask –"
I raised a hand to silence him before that train of thought could materialise and enter the atmosphere.
"Steele?"
"What?"
"Does he know about any of this?"
I paused and looked up to the ceiling.
"Fuck's sake. You haven't told him, have you?"
"Not yet," I admitted in a whisper. I scrunched up my face. "I know. I know. But he's been going through some stuff."
"The fucker is always going through shit," he fired back. "You need to talk to him. He'll want to know if something is bothering you."
I knew he was right. I knew I had to confide in Christian sooner or later, but after seeing him so worked up and fragile at the start of the week, the last thing I wanted to do was add to his stress. For now, I'm prioritising his wellbeing.
He protected me from the dark secrets lurking inside Elena's notebook until he knew I was strong enough to handle it. While this is by no means on the same level, I want to shield him from anything that will cause unnecessary hassle.
He will jump into CEO mode the second he finds out about SIP, and he will want to solve everything with a swish of his credit card.
It will cause arguments between us. I can see it happening.
"I will talk to him," I promised, more to myself than to Cal. "I'll see how he fairs over the weekend."
"Good," Cal sighed. "He loves you. He'll want to support you through this."
"I know he will. I'm just not sure I'm ready for that battle yet," I giggled.
He knew what I was getting at and gave me a wry smile in return.
"I'll let you get back to work," Cal told me. He stretched out his free arm over his head and yawned. "I need to head to the gym anyway… In the meantime, take a leaf out of Grey's book for a change. Stop giving a damn about everyone else. Trust me, the day you stop caring about other people, that will be the day you start getting on with shit. Getting on with what's actually important."
"Okay, Yoda," I chuckled.
"Laugh all you want, you know I'm right," he grinned. "Grey's got the right attitude. You need to stick your fingers in your ears and fuck everyone who has something rude to say about you."
"I don't think Christian will appreciate that last comment," I said, narrowing my eyes.
"I don't mean literally, you fucking moron," he huffed back at me, rolling his eyes. "Chat soon, yeah?"
"Sure," I nodded. "I missed you, you know? I wish you were still here."
"Can't say the same," he quipped. "Not missing you in the slightest."
"Liar!"
He flipped me the bird and hung up.
"Cal sends you his love," I called across the kitchen counter, peering back over my shoulder to see Christian's reaction.
He pursed his lips and slowly lifting his eyes from the stack of plates he had pulled out of the cabinet.
"You spoke to him today?" he checked. I nodded. "I can only guess the distasteful and crude things he had to say about me."
"He wasn't too bad today, actually," I smirked. "He called to catch up. He said he's definitely coming to the wedding, and he wants to bring a date with him."
"The latest notch on his bedpost, no doubt," Christian muttered, spinning on the spot and powering through to the dining table.
I followed him, carrying across the pot of paella I had rustled up. Although there were only five of us for dinner, I think I made enough to feed at least double that amount.
Kate and Elliot were already sat down, deep in conversation when we came back. I set the pot down in the centre of the table and took a second to study them together. I couldn't help but grin at the blissful, easy expression on both their faces. Their relationship was getting stronger by the day, the pair seemingly inseparable lately.
Kate assured me they were still taking things slow, enjoying this time to get to know each other properly.
But she did reveal that had reaffirmed the physical nature of their relationship. Borderline TMI, but apparently it was the best she has ever had.
I scanned the rest of the room, searching for the other Grey sibling.
Mia was nowhere to be seen, her spot at the table empty, her glass of wine untouched.
"She's probably upstairs," Christian said, nudging my elbow. "She's still not happy with the guest bedroom."
"I don't know why," I shook my head. "It looks perfect to me."
"She's always been a perfectionist," he replied. "But it's those bastard drapes she keeps fussing over. She says they aren't hanging properly. At this rate, I'm either going to start locking that door to stop her going in there, or I'm going to tear down the drapes and we'll do without any."
"At least she's finally found her calling," I smiled. I reached across and rubbed my hand down the length of his arm. "It's good that she's passionate about something other than using me like a human Barbie doll."
"It'd be better if she was passionate about eating," he sighed.
"She'll come down when she's hungry," I assured him. "She'll be fine."
I started dishing out the food, passing the plates around while Christian topped up our glasses. As usual, Elliot started hacking into his meal first, shovelling it into his mouth like it was going to disappear any second.
I sat down next to Christian and took a quick mouthful of my dinner. It tasted even better than I hoped it would. I threw together ingredients we had in the refrigerator, loosely following a recipe I pulled from Google.
"You should be grateful Ana and I have given up our date night for you," Christian told his brother and Kate, shooting them a daring look. "Fridays are normally our night."
"Well, you are the ones who insisted on booking a wedding with only three months notice!" Kate blurted. "There's a lot we need to start planning."
"And I take it you've assumed the role of our wedding planner?" Christian arched his brow.
"I'm always planning shit for GEH and you've never had any complaints," Kate countered, staring him in the eye. I glanced at Christian and saw him settle back into his seat. "Besides, you will need someone to help sort the finer details. It's what I do best. I'm a born party planner."
Christian snapped his chin to me, seeking back up.
"Come on, you have to admit she did a great job with the Grey Ball," I reminded him. "And it will help us out, having someone else to take charge of some things."
"Fine," he sighed, rolling his eyes.
I stretched across and gave him a loud, wet kiss on his cheek.
"We'll need to organise the big ticket stuff first," Kate announced. I frowned at her, silently demanding an explanation. "Venue, band, photographers, caterers, narrowing down how many people you want to invite, your dress… You need to get that stuff sorted ASAP."
"You've been reading wedding magazines, haven't you?" I questioned. She rolled her lips inward. I shook my head. "Please tell me you haven't subscribed to any?"
"Just one or two," she shrugged. She waved it off with a flick of her hand. "It's not every day my best friend gets married. You gotta give me this."
I chuckled at her ridiculousness. Something was telling me she had been compiling ideas before Christian even proposed.
"Have you started thinking about any of that stuff?" she pressed on, her green eyes darting between me and Christian.
"We have literally only just set a date," Christian said. He turned his head to me again. "Have you thought about that stuff? Because I haven't."
I shook my head.
"Do you want a church wedding?" Kate asked.
"No –" we replied in unison.
I smiled at Christian.
"Do you want any kind of religious influence?" I asked.
"No," he replied. "That's not important to me. You?"
"Me neither," I shrugged. "In terms of numbers, what are you thinking? Big or small?"
"Definitely small," he answered instantly. "I only want family and some close friends. Very private."
"I'm glad you said that," I snorted. "I want it to feel relaxed. Nothing too over the top… I still want it to be special but not intense. If that makes sense?"
"I understand," he nodded. His hand slid over to mine, his fingers curling around my own. "I get it, and I want that too. I took on board what you said the other night. Our wedding shouldn't be stressful. We shouldn't go into it with this huge pressure on us. It's a celebration. It's meant to a happy day."
I grinned at his comments.
"So, we're agreed that it's going to be a low-key, relaxed, intimate wedding? No frills, no hassle, no stress?"
He nodded his confirmation.
"But I do have one request," he whispered.
"Name it?"
"Your dress needs to have some lace on it," he purred. He leaned over and brought his lips to my ear. "I fucking love you in lace."
A shiver coursed down my spine, tingling from the nape of my neck to the soles of my feet.
Elliot exhaled a heavy groan from the other side of the table, breaking us apart. I shot him a hard stare.
"I'm trying to eat over here," he huffed, shaking his head. "Anyway, how many people have you told about the date already?"
"Family, a couple of friends," I shrugged. "The most important people."
"Your dad knows?"
"He does," I nodded. "I think he's more excited than us! He can't wait."
"He's not worried about losing his little girl?" Elliot arched his brow.
"He doesn't see it as losing a daughter," I said. "Because he's gaining a son."
Christian's hand tightened around mine.
I knew how important it was to him that Ray had accepted him with open arms. He wasn't taking it for granted.
"What about your mom?" Elliot asked. "Is she flying over from… is it Georgia she's living now?"
A sharp silence whipped around the table.
I sagged in my seat at the mention of my mother.
Kate elbowed Elliot in the side, catching him in the ribs. He winced.
"Ouch!" he grumbled, scowling at her. "What was that for?"
"Shush," she ordered him.
"But I'm –"
"It's fine," I intervened, holding up my hand to Kate. "It's okay."
I looked over to Elliot, observing the confusion and pain on his face.
"I don't talk to my mom," I explained. His lips formed an O shape. "We don't have a good relationship… Well, any kind of relationship."
"I'm sorry," he breathed. "I didn't know."
"We haven't spoken to each other in a while," I added. I gave him a shy smile, despite the uneasiness I felt from talking about her. "I don't think she even knows about me and Christian yet."
"You haven't told her you're in a relationship, let alone getting married?"
I shook my head.
Elliot blew out his cheeks. "Jesus… that's fucked up."
"Tell me about it," I sighed. "It's been months since I spoke to her. We had a fight."
"Don't you miss her?"
"We weren't that close before," I shook my head again. "It's complicated."
Elliot accepted my answer. He didn't press for more information.
"Ana?" Kate said my name, drawing my eyes to her. "Do you want Carla there?"
I hesitated.
"I don't know," I muttered.
Truth is, I hadn't thought about my mother at all.
Do I want her there?
Do I want to open up the lines of communication again, after all this time?
After all that has been said between us? The name calling? The spitefulness?
I had sent her a birthday card and gift a few months back, but only to appease Ray. I never received a response from her. No calls, no texts. Nothing at all.
Not that I was expecting a reply.
I didn't even get a card from her for my birthday. I didn't get one last year, either.
My mother has always been selfish. She has never thought about anyone but herself. She's the centre of her universe and everyone else is a mere player in it. No one else matters but the mighty Carla.
She hasn't bothered to reach out to me and make amends.
Would she even care that I'm getting married?
Has she given me a second thought since I told her to go fuck herself in a fit of anger?
I sank deeper into my thoughts, my eyes dropping to my plate and my largely untouched paella.
Could the wedding finally bring me and my mother together?
