Chapter Sixteen - Two Ghosts


AN - Hey everyone! Just here to say thank you for the continued support and I hope you are all enjoying the story. After this chapter we are going to start getting back into the actual Twilight plot, so lots to look forward to there. Without further ado, enjoy chapter sixteen!


We're not who we used to be

We're not who we used to be

We're just two ghosts standing in the place of you and me

Trying to remember how it feels to have a heartbeat

Harry Styles - Two Ghosts


Disclaimer - I don't own anything Twilight-related, that all belongs to one Stephanie Meyer

It was raining hard, and of course, I had forgotten my coat.

I jumped from the car, looking up at the Cullen's house.

Leaving Addy home after work, I decided I should probably go and have a word with a couple of Vampires about how they should pre-warn me before throwing me into the shitter as they had this morning.

I was mildly surprised that there was no one waiting by the windows looking down at me.

"Hmm," Having gotten comfortable doing so, I walked into the house, looking around for some sort of movement or noise.

Maybe no one was around. I was reminded of my little breaking and entering fiasco, the quiet making me uncomfortable.

"Back again?"

"Christ!" I turned, hand on my chest. "You really should make a noise or something, you'll give me a heart attack Rosalie."

She stood behind me, with a blank expression. There was no sign of Emmett which caused immediate concern. Emmett is the only reason she would usually come near me.

"Why are you here?" she asked.

"Oh." I looked around, shuffling. "I was coming to see everyone, well mainly Alice… but, you know-" I laughed awkwardly.

"What is your endgame?"

"Uh… What?" I continued laughing, praying someone would come out of the woodwork and save me from this frosty atmosphere.

"Why are you clinging on to my family like a flea? What are you trying to gain? Want to get your claws so deep in that you have us all at your every beck and call?"

"Um… could we maybe rewind a bit? Because I feel like I've missed a good chunk of this conversation."

"I don't trust you. No matter how much you charm the rest of them."

"Yeah, I already got that." I rolled my eyes.

"How did you find us?" She demanded. I looked at her properly. She must have been waiting for a while to let this all out. The fire in her eyes, the determination… made me wary.

My gut told me there was no one else here. She wouldn't dare confront me in such a way otherwise.

"I don't understand?" I replied, brows furrowed.

She scoffed, "Then let me make it clearer for you," She took a few steps closer, and I swallowed hard, "How did you know we were in Forks?"

I shook my head, "I didn't? What are you talking about?"

"Did you and that Bella girl plan this? Want to come and expose us? Some sort of weird revenge for what happened in Canada?"

"I don't know where you're getting all of this from, but you sound very paranoid. I had never even met Bella before coming here. And I sure as hell didn't know you lived here. You think I would have done the stupid things I did if I knew for certain you were all here?"

"You humans are all the same. Sticking your nose where it doesn't belong."

"You humans?" I said, annoyance growing, "You immortals sure do forget you were once the same as us pathetic human's."

"Trust me, I will never forget." There was a flurry of emotions flying across her face and I didn't have enough time to process it before she continued, "You are a fool if you think Alice will turn you-"

"Turn me? Into what? A bat? If you're going to accuse me of something, at least make it make sense."

"Turn you into one of us."

I looked at her for a moment, completely confused as to what she meant. And then it dawned on me.

"You think I want to be a vampire." I had to try very hard to keep from laughing.

"Well why else would you always be around us, why do you persist in getting involved?" She demands again, clearly taken aback by my response.

I looked around the room as though I would find some logic, "Well… Alice is my friend and well I think the others are starting to grow on me… I, well I like it. I haven't felt so at home as I have in Fork's since… well before you left Canada."

I sat down on the sofa behind me, twiddling my thumbs, "I know it's not the same for you and you probably think I'm pathetic. But that's fine, you can think that if you like. Because you even existing at all makes me feel normal. It sounds strange I know. And it's terrifying, knowing there's so much more out there than us mortals could even begin to fathom... but I always knew... in my gut, I knew tat there had to be more. I feel like I can finally be open and comfortable about that side of me. I'm not just the weird girl who thought her teacher was a mermaid, whose friend left and dad died…"

She didn't say anything, but she hadn't moved either. I continued on, "By the time I got here I felt like I had nothing, no purpose in life. No direction. But in such a short amount of time, that's all changed, and I just know things are changing for the better you know? All my new friends, seeing how happy my mum is and reconnecting with Alice… And maybe it seems like I'm clinging, but it's not because I want anything from you all or I'm trying to threaten or expose you. For goodness sake you could snap me in two before that even happened!"

I looked up at her now, to see her unreadable expression watching me closely.

"It's because I like it here. I like your family, I like getting to know you all. Because you're not just vampires. You're people, just like the rest of us. Just a bit better at everything, and way more attractive, and stronger and faster and-"

"Is this you trying to convince me you don't want to be one of us?" I could tell by her tone she was being sarcastic, but not… Cold.

I snorted, "Just thought it would stroke your ego if I gave you lots of compliments."

"Why don't you want to be turned? Most humans would jump at the chance to change if they could."

I shrugged awkwardly, getting more comfortable in the seat. "For all the upsides of being a vampire, there seems to be a lot of downsides too. The thought of hurting someone, or… killing them, because I wanted… blood or whatever. That would terrify me. And eternity is an awfully long time. I don't know how much I would want that, to never properly have a family, and grow old with someone you love..."

I bit my lip, "I mean you obviously became a vampire. Why did you decide on this life but are so against it for others?"

Rose looked away for a moment, expression blank. "I didn't decide." I didn't say anything, waiting for her to continue, "I was dying and Carlisle made a choice. And that is the choice I have to live with."

"I'm sorry."

"I don't want your pity." She hissed.

"It's not pity. It just sounds like a horrible thing to have to deal with. I'm sure it must be very confusing."

Her blank stare was starting to unnerve me, but I didn't break eye contact. There was something different in this conversation. She seemed angry at times, yes. But there was something more. Like an attempt to understand, or a frustration I couldn't quite grasp.

"Why did you come to Fork's then?" She crossed her arms. It wasn't accusatory this time. More like curiosity.

I shrugged again, "There wasn't much left for me. My mum had moved back here, my dad's been gone a good few years now, and I didn't have loads of friends. Oh! And I walked in on my ex sleeping with someone else in our bed. Really ruined the whole vibe of the place after that."

Rosalie wrinkled her nose in disgust, "No wonder your life seemed so pathetic, you kept such awful company."

I laughed, "you're so wise. And now I have such amazing company, I'll be the coolest human in the whole of Washington."

"Debatable." She narrowed her eyes, curious, "You don't seem very torn up by his betrayal."

I tilted my head, "If anything it gave me the excuse you leave…I think I was just blinded by the comfort and ease of the relationship, we had been together for quite a while. I expected him to be the guy I was with forever at one point, he seemed pretty perfect. Funny how sometimes you don't realise how awful someone is until they do something horrible to you."

"Yes… I suppose you're right." She said it quietly, looking away, almost as though I wasn't there anymore.

I twiddled my fingers again, cautiously continuing, "Where are you from or when…? I feel like I don't know anything about who you are… or well, were? Or whatever the correct way of phrasing it is."

She looked at me for the first time with what couldn't be described as a warm expression, but it wasn't cold either.

"Rochdale… New York. I was born in 1915."

"Oh, wow." For the first time the reality of just how long ago these beings were born had hit me. How fascinating.

Then her eyes flew up to the doorway behind me. Turning curiously, I followed her eye line.

I scoffed.

"How long have you been standing there?" I asked Jasper, who was looking curiously between us.

"Not long." He said. "Just checking Rosalie hadn't killed you yet."

"Not yet no," I smirked, laughing at Rose's extreme eye roll, her demeanour back to normal.

"I'm leaving now. This place stinks of human."

"Good talk!" I shouted after her as she disappeared. I secretly hoped we would get to speak again, I wanted to know what it was like to be alive in the early 1900s.

"You seem surprisingly in good spirits, despite how some of that conversation went."

"Eavesdropping were you?"

"It can't exactly be helped."

"Uh-huh." I threw myself back into the pillows, hoping Alice would hurry back from wherever she was hiding.

"Come on," Jasper said.

"What? Where?"

He rolled his eyes, "She isn't coming back anytime soon. If you want to sit there on your own in silence, by all means."

He turned and walked away. I was hesitant, confused at the quick exchange, but quickly rose to follow him.

He was in his study, back turned to me by the desk. I stood awkwardly at the door, feeling out of place.

He didn't move as he spoke, "Well? Are you just going to stand there all day?

I huffed, stomping into the room, "You're not a very inviting person, you know that?"

He turned, leaning against the desk and shrugged, "So I've heard. Do try not to break anything." In the second I blinked he had sat in the chair, bending over the papers in front of him.

I stuck my tongue out at him, as he returned to what he was doing, and awkwardly shuffled in place, taking in the familiar surroundings of the cozy office. Despite the initial uncomfortable feeling in my gut, the room did give off a calming energy. Or maybe that was him… Literally.

My eyes fell on the bookshelves against one of the walls and I stepped closer, looking at the variety of covers, old and new, of different colours and sizes.

I hummed, "The American Civil war? Riveting stuff." I drawled sarcastically, running my fingers along the spines. I took one of the books from the shelf, flicking through the pages.

"I know you prefer the more exotic subjects, but some of us prefer to be a bit more grounded in our reading subjects."

"Say's the VAMPIRE."

I could see a slight smirk on his lovely face, though he didn't look up from the paper. I studied him for a moment, the smooth marble skin, any flaw unseen to my eyes. Golden eyes that flickered across the pages with ease. How had I found them scary before? I couldn't quite remember at that moment. The delicate but firm way he held the pen in between his fingers, gliding, the perfect curve of his lips. And how does anyone even have hair that shiny looking? That soft? I wonder what it would feel like to run your fingers through it?

It was like one of those statues you stare at in awe at a museum had come to life.

It was only when his eyes flicked up to meet mine that I realised he had stopped writing.

My face was flooded with heat and I walked sideways into the bookshelf, fumbling with the book in hand to make it seem like I was totally just trying to put it away this whole time.

Seeing he was still watching me, I patted the now replaced book a few times, "Good stuff."

One eyebrow raised, indicating he did not believe me, did not help with the mortification I was feeling at that moment.

"Wow," I fanned my face quickly, trying to blow the blush away, "Is it hot in here, or just me?"

"Just you."

I bit my tongue. Taking a breath I turned to him with determination, irritated at that stupid amused look on his face.

How did I just think that it was lovely? It's annoying, that's what it is.

"What are you doing anyway?" I asked.

"Math homework."

My face screwed up, as though I had just eaten a lemon, "You're doing math homework? Disgusting."

"Another thing you aren't interested in? Shocking."

"Who on earth enjoys math class. Except someone like you I suppose."

"Incredibly smart? Good looking? Has a keen interest in blood?"

"Humble too."

He chuckled quietly, "I think you would be hard pressed to find a humble vampire."

"It's true, you do all seem rather big headed. Severe superiority complex."

"Well, we are superior."

"Careful, your head might get so big you'll not be able to get through the door."

He hid a smile, leaning on his knuckle staring at me in some way I could not describe. Cautious interest maybe?

I leaned against the bookshelf, smiling bashfully, feeling exposed under his gaze for some reason. Is this that special effect vampires have on people?

Get it together girl!

"Surely Vampires don't need to do homework."

"It's due tomorrow. I like to keep my grades up."

I snorted, "Wow, out of everything I have learned thus far about you lot, the most bizarre and hilarious thing is how serious Jasper Hale takes his math homework. Such a good little student. You would think 80 years or whatever of life would have made you like Albert Einstein or something."

"161 actually."

I physically leaned forward, "Excuse me?"

"I am 161 years old, not '80 or whatever.'"

I stared at him in shock for a beat, my head hurting at the thought of someone being alive that long ago…

"Wait, when were you born?"

"Ah yes, math isn't your strong suit." he nodded. I huffed, giving him a look to urge him on, "I was born in 1844." He paused for a moment, "When were you born?"

I furrowed my brows, too shocked by his age to think about the question, "uh…1982."

He nodded, "So you're pretty old then? Hanging out with a bunch of teenagers. What must the locals think."

Offended, and knowing it would be like throwing a feather, I lifted one of his precious history books to throw at him but I couldn't.

As I turned, book in hand, that gentle but firm hold of Jasper's fingers were around my wrist, holding me still. The cool feel of his hand almost soothed the flush that ran over my body at the close proximity.

So close.

I didn't know where to look, but once you met those eyes it was hard to look away.

"Stop using your stupid vampire charm on me," I whispered.

He smiled, "I'm not using any charm, darlin'." His hand easily slipped up my wrist, pausing for a moment at my pulse. I could feel it beating uneveningly against his fingers, and for a moment I held my breath, not knowing what to do, but not wanting to move either.

Then, as though it was nothing, his hand slipped the book from my grasp and he smiled with ease, "Besides, I thought you were the one who said I was uninviting, remember?"

I breathed out a laugh, my brain feeling a bit mushy.

Stupid vampire.

He replaced the book back in its spot, then hesitated, his eyes narrowing in thought.

I caught myself falling into a trance of staring and hurried to fill the silence again, "What is it."

He turned his head and analysed my face for a moment, clearly trying to make a decision.

"Oh god, you haven't decided to eat me have you?"

He rolled his eyes, and moved away from me further down the shelves, "I have something I think you might appreciate." He pulled a bright yellow book toward him and made his way back to me.

He twirled the book and offered it to me. I took it cautiously, and in my surprise, I felt my grip loosen slightly.

"Do NOT drop it." He said, hands flashing underneath mine in case an emergency book rescue was needed.

I gently tightened my grip again, not moving, I suppressed a squeal in my throat.

"Is this…?"

"A first edition. The pros of being alive as long as I have I suppose."

I grinned at the bright red title of Bram Stokers 'Dracula.'

Carefully I began flicking through the delicate pages, the smell of old books filling my senses. I couldn't keep the smile off my face.

"Holy shit, I think this might be the coolest thing I have ever seen!"

It was a warm moment when I met his gaze and we looked at each other with a genuine smile. I poured over the book for a while longer, making comments and gushing over the details and condition.

Staring at it a moment longer, I offered it back to Jasper. "Thank you for letting me see this. I think you might have made my day.

He reached a hand out, but unlike I expected, he didn't take it. Instead he gently pushed it back toward me.

"You can keep it."

My eyes widened, and I thrust the book back at him, "Oh no, no I couldn't, it's much too valuable-"

"I've read it a load of times already. It was good, not very accurate though." He smirked, moving away as I opened my mouth to argue.

"Alice is back, she's waiting for you in the living room." He looked at me expectantly.

I fought with myself, unsure of whether to go, or force him to take back his book.

He rolled his eyes, "If you don't take it, I will throw in the bin, maybe even set it on fire-"

I gasped, "Blasphemy! How could you even suggest such a crime, you evil evil man." I bit my lip, swaying, "Fine," I whispered finally, "Thank you." I beamed, though I felt too awkward to meet his gaze.

I shuffled back to the door, excited to share my new gift with anyone who would listen.

Then I stopped, I turned back to Jasper, his brow furrowing in confusion as he looked at me questionly.

"Well…" I said, "Aren't you coming?" I nodded my head in the direction of the living room.

A pause. Then with a shrug, he followed, and we walked in a comfortable silence to join the rest of the family.

I couldn't help the victorious thought running through my head, And he said he didn't want to be friends.