Rey waits while Ben prepares himself for the auction with the help of his protocol droid, but once Ben reveals himself, will Rey be able to keep her hands to herself? (no) Will Ben? (also no).
Rey didn't take his hand, instead opting to pass Ben her sack of things, which he took without comment, surprisingly. She was about to ask why he'd bothered to pick her up personally, but Ben broke the silence first. "Back again so soon?"
"You going to pretend like you had nothing to do with this?" Rey drawled while walking that fine line between happy to see him, and pissed off that she was back in his proximity again.
Ben waved his hands in a conciliatory manner, opalescent nail polish flashing as he assured her, "I didn't have anything to do with it. My mother has a mind of her own."
"And you just let her do whatever she wants?"
"Let her? If you knew my mother, you'd realize how there's no stopping her once she gets an idea in her head and, besides," he stepped close and waited for Rey to look up at him.
"Besides what?"
Ben licked his lips, tongue peeking out as he purposefully drew attention to his mouth, unhelpfully reminding her of all the sinful things he could do with that mouth, and she was so struck by it what he said next almost didn't register. "It'll be easier to keep you out of trouble this way."
Rey blinked as the words slowly rolled around in her mind. Here he was, standing there like he hadn't completely blown her mind the last time they were together. And acting like he was responsible for keeping her safe. Which maybe he'd saved her ass from that gang of party-crashers, but still!
She was not going to let this comment slide."Keep me out of trouble? I'm your bodyguard!"
Ben laughed as if she'd said the funniest thing in the world. He was so fucking strange. "How about we keep each other safe then?" he suggested like it was an option, in spite of the fact that she was currently with him because it was a paid job.
"I've never needed anyone to keep me safe before, why would I need someone now?"
"Well, you've never been wrapped up in my life before. If the gossip holonists don't get you, someone else might. So, take my advice, and take my help," he said, reasonably. Rey did know that the gossip holonists could make her life living hell or, worse, out her to the syndicates, but there was no reason for them to care about who she was at all.
Rey narrowed her eyes, glaring up at him as she asked, "Why do I get the feeling something is going on here that you're not telling me about?"
Ben cocked his head to the side and smiled knowingly. "There is so much going on that I'm not ever going to tell you about. You're just going to have to trust me."
Rey's hands came up to her face, fingertips massaging into the pressure points on her temple. "You're going to be the death of me, aren't you?"
He leaned in, voice barely above a whisper as he assured her, "Only the 'little death,' smuggler."
She rolled her eyes but said nothing. He had given her that. And how much trouble could one Aristo get into, anyway? As long as she didn't do anything stupid, keep her head down, keep her hands to herself. Mustering her strength, Rey took a deep breath and stepped away from the decadent Aristo. Her expression shifted, mask sliding into place as she fought to keep things professional between them.
"Mr. Solo," she tried, even though it sounded wrong from her lips.
Ben's nose flared a little, eyebrow quirking as if he was both annoyed and interested in where this was going. "No," he said shortly.
"No?"
"If we're playing games, and you want to keep your distances, I don't go by 'Mr. Solo.'"
"Well, what do you go by?"
"'Your highness' or have you forgotten that you're working for the Prince of Alderaan?"
Rey blanched and realized that she'd made things so much worse for herself by giving him an opportunity to be insufferable. Here, she'd tried to maintain some semblance of formality between them, as if she hadn't ridden his leg the last time they were together. And now, he'd gone and made her realize that, of course, he was a prince, so there'd always be an insurmountable distance between them.
She was such an idiot. But she wasn't going to call him by his title, even if it was the proper, formal thing to do. "Maybe I'll stick to Ben," she sighed, defeated.
"You sure? I will say, I do have a preference for 'your Highness' in intimate settings," he drawled.
Rey barely kept herself from growling. She was absofuckinglutely not going to be calling him "your Highness," or "Prince" or anything to do with royal titles, and certainly not in any intimate situations between them—except there weren't going to be any intimate situations between them, not again. Right?
A part of Rey never wanted to give Ben what he desired. One, because he was an ass. A celebrity brat with an ego to match. And two, it was way, way, way too dangerous to consider what it would be like to give in to someone like him, to imagine a scenario where she'd be open to calling him—no, moaning his title.
Stupid, spoiled, arrogant, entitled—
"Actually titled," he miraculously cut into her internal monologue.
"Are you going to play the game where you pretend you can read my thoughts?"
"Who's pretending?" he said before laughing at her furious expression. "Oh, Rey. You can't hide anything from me. I don't need to be able to read minds to know exactly what you're thinking."
"Bad trait for a bodyguard," Rey grumbled.
Ben's expression softened. "Don't worry. I'm the only one who notices. Anyway, waiting here for you has taken up half of my day, on what's already a busy day for me."
Rey stepped back and gave a half-hearted bow. "Well, thank you for your graciousness. Shall we get to it, then?"
Ben's lip quirked, and Rey realized that he was baiting her. "Yeah, let's get to it, smuggler. Do we want to talk about what happened between us on Coruscant now, or wait till you pop later?"
Taking a deep breath, Rey managed to contain her fury. "Look, it was a onetime thing. I'm here professionally, I'm being paid—and not for secret trysts, okay?" she clarified at his amused look. "Being paid by your mother."
"Duly noted. C'mon then. 3PO is waiting for us at the shuttle," Ben said with a little wave towards the turbolift.
"3PO?"
"My 'droid, C-3PO. Well, my family's protocol 'droid. You might like him—he's kind of high strung."
"I'm going to pretend that's not a thinly veiled jab at me," Rey said as they walked side by side to the 'lift.
"Oh, look at you. Not rising to the bait? This isn't going to be as much fun as I thought, then."
Rey pressed the digital pad to call the 'lift. "This isn't fun. It's work," she replied.
"And work can't be fun?"
"No. Work is professional. Get in, get done, and get out."
Ben snorted. "I've had relationships like that too. I have to say, Rey, it's more fun when you take a little time. Even professionally, better to make sure you've done a thorough job, isn't it?"
The door for the 'lift chimed as Rey huffed her way on. "And how thorough were you expecting?" she grated, this time letting him get under her skin.
"Depends on how much fun you want to have," he replied as a brilliant smile worked its way onto his handsome face. "You know how much I enjoy having fun, but I get the feeling that you don't have much fun. Maybe that's something we can work on together?"
For a moment, Rey was struck dumb by his smile—the dimples in his cheeks, the way it transformed his face and messed up the smarmy, Aristo mask he often seemed to wear. Like this, with a real smile on his face, he was breathtakingly handsome. Almost wholesome looking, which was such a contradiction that she couldn't make heads or tails of it.
She couldn't affect grumpiness to that face. "Ben, I'm here to work. I need to keep you safe. What if one of your rabid fans breaks out of line and uhh… tries to grope you?"
Ben shrugged. "Wouldn't be the first time. And besides, I've handled worse."
Rey was about to ask him just what he was talking about, but the 'lift chimed again as the doors split open and Ben stepped out before she could ask. His 'droid was waiting for them at the upper-level docking bay. The 'droid was humanoid, and its body was a brilliant, glittering gold color—because of course, Ben had a golden 'droid—and he just as high strung as Ben had promised.
"Master Ben!" the 'droid cried in his Core-accent. "We are dangerously close to being late for the auction."
"It's fine, 3PO. They can't start without me. Anyway, this is my bodyguard, Rey."
The 'droid turned its unblinking gaze on her. "It is a pleasure to make your acquaintance, Mistress Rey."
Rey balked. "Oh, no. Please, you don't have to call me 'Mistress.' Just 'Rey,' thanks."
Ben smirked as 3PO started to prattle, "I am afraid that would be against my programming. However, there are many other honorifics I could use—"
Rey held her hands out in front of her to stop him from listing all the honorifics that were possible in the millions of different languages that he likely knew how to speak. "You know what? Miss works, how about that?" she suggested.
"Oh, gladly!" 3PO chirped. "Again, it is a pleasure to make your acquaintance, Miss Rey. Please inform me if there is any way in which I might be of help to you."
Rey smiled. Ben was right. She did kind of find the 'droid endearing in an anxious sort of way. And his personality did remind her of her tendency to catastrophize or offer up solutions to things that weren't actually problems.
3PO ran through Ben's schedule as they made their way through the hangar before entering a white shuttle—Executive class, from the looks of it. Not massive, but not small either. Definitely nicer than the shuttles she and Finn normally managed to scrape up while on assignment. The interior was dark and plush, a contrast to the stark white of the exterior, and seemed to be fitted with a variety of amenities, including a drink bar. Rey settled into a wide chair as Ben snagged seat beside her before she could lift her legs on it.
"Time for a nap, I think," Ben said as Rey sighed.
"Must be hard having everyone love you and serve you all the time," she quipped.
"You have no idea. Can I borrow your shoulder?" he teased.
"Absolutely!"
"Really?"
Rey laughed. "No. I'm your bodyguard, remember? I have to keep alert in case anything happens while we're flying."
Ben huffed a little with mock disappointment. "Next time," he assured her.
And then, to her surprise, he did take a nap. The sound of rain hitting the exterior of the ship was actually kind of soothing. It did rain on Takodana, but not quite like how it did on Arkanis, which was known for being in an almost constant state of rain. It wasn't a long ride to his apartment and 3PO had made most of the arrangements before her arrival. Ben was going to change, prep, and then they were off to the charity event.
3PO had run through the details of the even on their way to Ben's apartment, as well, though her datapad had also given Rey a brief idea of what was going on. Apparently, attendees would bid on dates for charity. And the winning bids got to be seen on the town with Ben Solo—and some other prominent individuals, Rey didn't recognize many of the names. While Ben slept, Rey did some research on the event hall and attendees.
Armitage Hux was going to be there and, as 3PO had said, he'd called in a favor from Ben for this event. Rey wondered whether it would be awkward having the two of them together, given how public their breakup had been, but she decided that maybe it would just be entertaining. It'd be nice to see Ben squirm a little.
The flight into the city center took about 20 minutes, and Ben was up again before Rey had to wake him. A few minutes more, and they were in his apartment. It was open, minimalist, and let a lot of light in, despite the dreary gray from the clouds outside. With a sunken living room that blended into the kitchen, and a long hallway that led off into several rooms, it was about a hundred times larger than what she was used to.
3PO was kind enough to take her poncho, which left her in her work clothes. But from the look Ben was giving her, she might as well have been wearing nothing at all. Rey did her best not to blush under Ben's heated gaze.
She was just wearing her normal work clothes—dark pants and shirt, and her chest was fitted with light, fiber armor plating. It was all tightly cut to keep from getting caught on anything and far from the sexiest thing she'd ever worn around him, but Ben was staring at her like he was having a hard time keeping his hands to himself.
Rey coughed a little, breaking the tension as she asked, "Shoes off or on?" She had traveled enough to know that not everyone appreciated shoes on and, given that there was some soft looking carpet throughout much of the apartment, she thought to ask.
"Off, preferably. Unless it will hinder your work?" Ben commented while settling her bag at the entrance before slipping off his soft-looking leather boots.
"I can kick ass with shoes on or off," she assured him. "Just didn't want to ruin your carpet."
Ben's lips curled into an amused half-smile. "Appreciated. I'm going to go get ready. 3PO can help you with finding food or refreshments. Be sure to eat and drink all that you'd like. I don't know how good the food will be at this event and I'd rather you not go hungry," Ben said before disappearing into the closest room. It was almost sweet that he made sure she ate, at least until a "You're grumpier when you don't eat," floated from within his room.
Ass, Rey thought. Even though he was right, though how he knew it was beyond her. Rey assumed Ben had retired to his bedroom and wondered where hers would be, given that she was scheduled to help him throughout his trip to Arkanis. She'd be on the planet for just over two days.
Hopefully, my room is far enough away from his that I'll be able to resist the temptation to be close to him…
Rey decided to worry about sleeping arrangements and where to put her things later. Instead, she'd focus on more important things, like food. Rey didn't ever turn down free food, and 3PO helped her find some fresh fruits, including meiloorun melon, which was a favorite of hers. Though, Rey didn't often have much of a chance to eat it, given that it was hard to track down on Takodana and had to be shipped in from off-planet.
After thanking 3PO for his help, Rey stepped over to the sunken living room and managed to balance her plate of fruit while settling into a low couch. She had to admit, it was pretty comfortable if a little excessive. At least eight sentients could fit on the long, wide couch. Though as she slipped back and settled in, Rey began to appreciate how comfy it was.
Rey snacked and tried to keep herself from relaxing too much and, soon enough, banging noises from Ben's room caught her attention. "You okay in there?"
Ben groaned. "Yes, I'm just having some trouble finding the right damn thing to wear—3PO, can I get your help with this?"
Had she ever heard him curse before? She wasn't sure, but she wondered if the way he spoke was also a part of his public persona. She, on the other hand, cursed loudly and often. It would probably be best to shelve that bad habit for the time being. Being vulgar would only draw more attention to herself, and she didn't need that considering being his bodyguard was already putting her front and center.
Rey watched as 3PO shuffle-walked towards Ben's room. Rey could just make out Ben's voice grumbling something about 'This is why I don't agree to do jobs like this.'
"What do you even do for work, anyway?" Rey wondered while Ben fussed around. It sounded like he was tearing his room apart and, judging from the indignant cries from his 'droid, he was pulling his room apart.
"Work?" Ben's incredulous voice sounded from somewhere deep in his room. "I guess you could say I get paid to play a part," his voice trailed off as he went further into his room—probably further into a closet. Rey hadn't seen his bedroom, but given how much space the rest of his 'apartment' had, she imagined it was endless.
Paid to play a part? What a stupid fucking Aristo thing to say.
An amused laugh rang out from the bedroom and either he'd found what he was looking for or he'd been able to divine her thoughts, yet again. Rey was too irritable off to care, either way. Here she was, the last place in the galaxy she should be, just nanoseconds away from being outed as the supply closet hussy that Ben had been with.
Not that GG had called her a hussy, per se. But Rey knew what would happen if someone like her was revealed as being… well, not in a relationship with, but connected to someone like Ben. Maybe he was right and she should take his help—at least until she figured out how to navigate the whole bodyguard to an Aristo thing.
The galaxy's preeminent bachelor—slumming, with someone like her? Yeah. Game over, Rey! And for what, a piece of Aristo ass? Rey sighed, angry that she couldn't quite convince herself that it wouldn't be worth it. Finally, Ben finished dressing, but whatever teasing remark she'd been planning on saying to him about taking forever to get ready died on her lips as he finally stepped out of his room.
Today, he was playing the part of 'Prince of Alderaan,' it seemed. Rey just barely kept her mouth from dropping open as Ben stepped into the hallway, dressed in a black outfit that was halfway between a dress and a jumpsuit, looking just like he'd stepped off of a Coruscanti runway.
Ben looked every bit the prince he was. His dark hair was brushed to the side in a messy wave. No hair jewelry with this look, but an elaborate chain slipped against the pale skin of his chest. His makeup was almost subdued, especially for him. A dark mark sat high on his left cheek, speaking to his reverence for the matrilineal side of his family. And the only bit of color on his face was his plum-colored lips, which looked plush and achingly kissable.
"That's quite the… Wow," Rey sputtered before she could stop herself.
Ben huffed a little before adjusting the deep buttons on the top part of his outfit, popping the buttons until it flowed against his chest in a deep V. He popped the buttons on his long sleeves and arranged his necklace while he admitted, "It's old, and I'm sure I'll get called out for recycling outfits, but I've been looking for an excuse to wear it again. I'm glad you approve."
"Would you change if I didn't?" Rey wondered as she popped the final piece of fruit into her mouth before setting the plate down on the couch. She awkwardly shuffled off of the huge couch and made her way over to where Ben was standing.
"No, but I do so enjoy having your approval, as infrequently as it comes my way," Ben replied with a wink.
C-3PO followed from behind, a pair of heels clutched in his golden hands. "The shoes you were looking for, Master Ben," the 'droid explained before handing them over.
Waves of gem-encrusted tulle fanned out from waves hips, glittering as he stepped into a pair of obscenely high heels. 3PO shuffled from Ben's apartment and left to prepare the shuttle, muttering all the while about how 'difficult princes could be,' which was just the best. Ben was right, Rey did like the 'droid.
"You can walk in those?" Rey marveled as the 'droid left, leaving her and Ben alone. If Rey wore anything other than flats, and she'd be on her ass or skittering around like a newborn fathier.
"Walk, dance… Usually the last piece of clothing I take off," Ben assured her with a wink as she slipped her boots on.
Rey knew exactly what he was implying, but she didn't give him the satisfaction of seeing her get flustered over the thought of him overwrought, pale skin flushed, lips parted, as he laid spread out in only his heels.
Nope. She'd take that thought with her to the grave, but he certainly would be none the wiser. Seeing him dressed like this had been quite enough excitement for her for one day. Though, Ben always did manage to catch her off guard with his fashion choices. Rey wondered what it must be like to have a closet with more than a few things hanging in it, to the point that he had to dig through the excess to find something to wear. She'd packed half of what she'd owned for the trip, and then a few items from Rose on top of it.
But it was fine. All of her extra credits were being saved for a one-way ticket to out of smuggling town. She could worry about looking nice when she had the life she wanted. And, besides, she'd noticed the way Ben's eyes lingered on the tight lines of her clothes. If his attention was anything to go by, she didn't look half bad when she was dressed to kill—literally.
Ben's trademark shimmer caught the light, the sheen of his skin reflecting much in the same way as his outfit. "It might get a little wild," he warned her.
"Wild, how?"
Ben shrugged a little. "I'm popular," he said as if it was everything she needed to know.
Rey choked out a laugh. "Yeah, I'm well aware. What does that mean for today's security?" She'd seen the pap-holos of events that he'd attended, but those were full of security details, so things stayed pretty much on the level.
"Oh, well. You're it for me. And 3PO. Normally, I can handle things myself, but my mother's been worried lately, and besides, why wouldn't I want the chance to spend some more time with my favorite smuggler?"
"Flattery will get you nowhere, Ben," she assured him.
"Ah, can't fault me for trying?"
"I suppose not. Anything else I need to know about this event?"
"My ex will be there."
"I read. Should I expect tears and drama?"
Ben huffed softly. "Tears aren't Armitage's style."
"The silent treatment then got it. Anything else?"
His lip quirked at her sass. "No. Can't wait for you to see how the rest of the galaxy fawns over me," he said with a yawn, his plush, plum-colored lips making a perfect 'O' before his hand came up to cover his face. "Sorry, I'm tired today," he mumbled around the yawn. "Hope there are refreshments at the auction—and caf."
Rey cocked her head to the side. "Tired, from what?"
Ben grinned. "If you only knew," he replied but didn't elaborate. Rey made up her own story, assuming he'd had a late-night tryst and was still tired from it.
"You're going to bring me nothing but trouble," Rey mused before sliding her feet into her sensible boots.
"Undoubtedly," Ben agreed. "But at least you can be certain that things will never be boring between us."
"Oh, boring's not in your dictionary, Ben. But I'll settle for marginally eventful."
"Marginally, how?"
"Just keep me out of the gossip holos and we're good," Rey explained.
Ben hummed thoughtfully. "I wouldn't worry about that. You're not the first bodyguard I've ever had, though you might be the prettiest. Galaxy Glitter doesn't generally seem to care about my staff."
"'Might' be?" Rey balked.
"Well, I once was under the protection of the most glorious Wookiee."
"A Wookiee? Seriously?"
"A coat like you wouldn't believe. It was immaculate," Ben explained before he stepped closer to Rey. His face scrunched up as he stared right at her mouth. "He was definitely cleaner than you, smuggler."
Before Rey could ask what he meant by that, Ben was reaching out and gently brushing at the corner of her mouth. She must have gotten some fruit stuck there and not realized. She really was a mess compared to him, wasn't she?
Rey was about to make an excuse, but Ben popped a finger into his mouth and sucked it clean. "Sunshine and fruit today," he mused. "Wonder what flavor of Rey tomorrow will bring for me?"
A sharp exhale and the color rising to her cheeks gave away exactly what she was remembering and the last time he'd commented on how she 'tasted.'
"You are the worst."
"It's not my fault that my bodyguard is so… juicy," he beamed. "How can I resist such a temptation?"
Rey huffed. "I don't know, but considering most sentients up until now have managed to do just fine ignoring me, I don't see why it's going to be a problem for you."
"That's because you don't see what I see."
"And what's that?" Rey asked without really expecting anything. Of course, as he was wont to do, Ben surprised her with his candor.
"I see someone who puts up a wall to keep the galaxy out. And I sense kindness and strength. And someone who is far more honorable than I'll ever manage to be."
"I run spice for a living," Rey deadpanned.
"We all do what we need to do to survive. And, from what I gather, Maz is getting out of that business soon. Besides, I know she only runs for Aristos. Honor among thieves, and all that."
Rey pursed her lips. Just how much did he know about what went on with Maz and, more to the point, how? Of course, his mother would probably have access to more information than Rey could ever dream of, but why would Ben be concerned about what went on with Maz?
Still, in an attempt to keep his words from taking root in her heart, Rey quipped, "You think all that just because you don't know me very well."
"That's partially true, though I think I know better than you realized. And besides, I'm trying to remedy that."
"Well, don't get your hopes up, Solo."
"I am a realist. Though, I do know at least some of your weaknesses."
"Oh, and what's that?"
"Food… and me."
"I am perfectly capable of resisting you," Rey stammered because it wasn't exactly true, was it? Even if she wasn't touch-starved and needy, she'd be drawn to him. He was the personification of every decadent dream that she'd stamped down on until she could go on, and drudge through her day-to-day. He was every dream she'd banished in an effort to stay focused and eke out some sort of living. People who were just trying to survive didn't get to have dream princes like Ben Solo. Dreaming big was beyond someone like her.
And Ben really was a prince, straight out of her holovids, and worst of all, he wanted her. Spice smuggler, desert rat, nothing that she was. He wanted her. It hurt her heart to think about it. So many sacrifices in a life where she'd never truly had enough. Her gaze met his and though she said nothing, she knew that he understood, somehow. His hand came up and gently brushed across her cheek, soothing her.
His hand continued on its path, fingertips brushing softly along the curve of her neck as he sweetly urged, "Tell me that again." He nearly begged her to deny him as if he needed to hear it as well, as if he was struggling to keep from giving in just as badly as she was.
Rey closed her eyes and tried to ignore the intoxicating way he invaded her senses. Scent, touch, the feel of his proximity, it wasn't natural—couldn't be. No other person had ever made her feel the way Ben did. And she could say it, that she could resist him, she could force the lie from her lips, but she didn't want to—either lie to or resist him.
So, she opened her eyes, held his gaze, and said the next best thing. "No."
His eyes sparkled with amusement. She'd given him what he wanted without actually giving him what he wanted. "I do enjoy it when you take that authoritative tone with me," he murmured. "Especially when you're pressing into my touch."
Was she? When he was close to her, it almost felt as if she lost control of her body. Somehow, her hand had come up and was resting against his exposed chest. Was she reaching out to touch or hold him back? Probably both. He was hot to the touch and she just barely kept herself from trailing her short nails over his skin.
"I'm just keeping things decent between us," she explained, even as her free hand came up to curl into the flowing tulle at his hip.
"But I'm trying my hardest to be indecent," Ben explained as Rey gave a little sigh—breathless or exasperated? It was hard for her to make sense of her emotions when he was so close.
You're being paid to be here. You're being paid by his mother to be here. You're a professional! Act professionally!
Ben's long fingers skimmed along her neck before threading into her hair. His touch was firm but gentle. Goosebumps prickled along her skin, her body tightened, and she waited.
His breath ghosted against her lips and her eyes fluttered in anticipation. "Sometimes, professionals have to get their hands a little dirty," he said in that uncanny way of his, answering her pervasive thoughts while working to undermine her resolve. "Shall we see if this lipstick is as kiss-proof as they claim?" he asked softly.
Rey didn't know what to say to that, but her tongue dipping out was answer enough. She couldn't have been more obvious about what she wanted, and yet he hesitated. His eyes looked like warm honey as he stared down at her. Ben swallowed hard, plush plum-colored lip captured between his white teeth as he took a deep, deep breath.
Just when she thought he was going to do the right thing and pull back, he let out a soft, shuddering breath, and bridged the gap between them. And when his hands held her tight, when his lips pressed against hers, when her arms came up to wrap around his neck, it was like coming home.
He knew what she liked—what she needed from him, even if she didn't want to admit it to herself. He tasted like sweet Corellian cinnamon, like one of the few precious treats she'd enjoyed during her short time at Maz's. He was a treat, and altogether too addictive, just the same.
Rey leaned into Ben, letting him take her weight as his free arm wrapped around her middle to hold her, her body crushed against the plumes of crinkly fabric that surrounded him. Her head fell back, and he deepened the kiss as her lips slipped open, tongue curling with hers as she clung to him.
Breathing felt optional when he kissed her, such an irrational, impossible thought that he was sustaining her life, and not the air around them. That's how he made her feel—nonsensical, drugged even. And each kiss, each touch, winnowed away her defenses, working on her mind and body, bit by bit. Wearing her down until she was stripped to her most base desires.
Just him. Just her. No galaxy or past or social classes acting as a barrier between them. Just a kiss. Just a touch. Just just just…
Ben plucked her bottom lip between his own, sucking as he finally pulled back. For a moment, his gaze took on an almost ferocious look, and Rey was certain that he was warring with himself and his desire. It was entrancing, and she felt relieved that she wasn't the only one who was being overwhelmed by feeling.
He swallowed, muscles in his neck rippling as he held himself back. "I'm not used to denying myself," he explained.
"Denial is all that I've ever known," she replied, truth spilling from her lips as Ben held her in his arms. She shouldn't tell him that. He could use it against her, but what was the use? He could just feel her thoughts, or whatever it was that he did, and find out the truth that way. It wasn't like she could hide much from him. Her body warred with her mind, but her desire was starting to win out over her good sense.
He said nothing to that, but his face took on a curious expression as she tipped her chin back and studied at his handsome face. The faint shimmer he favored was smeared from their kisses, but his lipstick, as promised, was kiss-proof.
"Indulge with me," he wickedly suggested. "And we can change that."
That was the hard part, wasn't it? She wanted to indulge in him and coming up with excuses as to why she shouldn't give in was getting harder and harder. Heartbreak? Loss? What was that to someone who never had love and family and worth, to begin with?
In a life of nothingness, would experiencing something be too hard to let go of once it came to its inevitable conclusion? Or would it give her sad little life a sharp spark of belonging, even if only for a moment?
Rey knew she couldn't keep her heart from Ben Solo, and that, once she gave in, that was it. But she never believed that he'd return the acute affection from someone as love-starved as herself. She held back precisely because she could not hold back at all once she gave herself over. The few times she'd trusted back on Jakku, her trust had been rewarded with betrayal.
Ben wouldn't betray her, would he? How could he? No, he'd only break her heart when he finally got bored with her. But what kind of heart did a smuggler have, anyway? It had already been broken into a million pieces, with shards that had been gnawed on by disappointment and hardship. Could a heart like hers even understand something like heartache anymore?
More and more, she wanted to find out. Push herself to the limit of experience with someone like Ben. What could go wrong?
Everything, the still somewhat sensible part of her brain reminded her.
He'd be worth it, her heart beat back.
Rey came to some sort of conclusion about Ben and what to do next. Whether sensing her shift or reflexing naturally to whatever her face and body were telling him, Ben seemed to reach his own conclusions, and what he did next caught her off guard.
Gently, like she was something soft and precious, and not a battle-hardened smuggler from a wasted, stagnant planet, he pulled her into his arms and held her. Heartbeats beating in time as their breath and warmth mingled. It wasn't the first time he'd just held her and Rey wondered how he instinctually seemed to know how much the simple gesture meant to her.
She was slowly coming to realize that she wasn't quite right about Ben. Maybe his life had been easier compared to hers, but maybe it hadn't. There was something there, just under the surface, that spoke to his pain and disappointment, and the longing and loneliness that comes from a lifetime of feeling forgotten. Surrounded, but alone. Not even his birthday was his own.
So much of Ben had always been shared with the galaxy, so much so that he was more myth than a man to some. And that must have been hard. Different from how things were hard for Rey, surely. But hard in its own way. Rey's arms came up and wrapped around his strong middle as she held him right back.
After long moments, his head ducked in and Ben pressed a tight kiss to her brow, before sighing. "C'mon, let's get to the event before I do something reckless like take you to my bed."
Rey got the impression he was dead serious and, this time, she didn't think she had sense enough to resist him, so it was probably good he was showing some restraint. Still, Rey was somewhere between disappointed and relieved as he slipped his hand down from the back of her neck, and stepped away from her, taking his heat and scent and alluring presence with him.
But he didn't lead the way. Ben stopped and held his hand back to her, waiting until she'd gently threaded her fingers with his own as they walked out into the afternoon, hand in hand, blissfully unaware of what awaited them at the auction.
Author's Notes: Did you know that cinnamon exists in SW land? Because I checked before I threw it in here (most of the things I throw in here, I check before I do. Just because it's an AU, doesn't mean I don't try to make it as in world as I can haha). Most things I try to check to see if there's an in-universe equivalent before throwing it in here. How's that for accuracy in a fic that's AU lol. All well, if I wanted easy, I'd not write SW fanfic hahaha. Anyways, thanks so much for all of your lovely comments and follows and for reading! How many credits will it take for ONE DATE with Ben Solo?
