Disclaimer: I don't own Fire Emblem Three Houses, all rights to the owners.

So many choices… hmm… okay… gotta do something more quirk-focused this chapter though. Last chapter established Hilda as a side character and fleshing out Claude's general attitude, but y'all are (presumably) here for the quirks.

So let's see…


Claude is a half elf. Well, half dark elf. To a human he looks like a dark elf, to a dark elf he looks like a human. Still, the physical markers of a half-elf are fairly distinct in terms of how different he is from a human. Pointed ears, chocolate skin (there is some variation in half-elf skin color, and less so for a proper dark elf, but certainly less than humans), naturally slim (partially on account of elves only having 11 pairs of ribs rather than humans' 12), generally being a few inches taller than expected for a human, and a more elongated eye socket. It's not as drastic as some others species, like a harpy, but it's not hard to see if you really look.

Some species look exactly human though. Humans seem to be a baseline for some reason. Claude has some theories about it, mostly involving evolution and humans being so common that other species adapted to resemble them so they wouldn't get murdered for looking too different. Heck, humans were so common that some predators evolved that specialized in preying on them (succubi, alraunes, that sort of thing). Not that humans are strong or anything, no, they seem to be the evolutionary rats of all the sentient species. Weak, frail, but they breed (relatively) quickly. Technology was once said to be their unique strength, but Claude is fairly sure they got technologically advanced first because they had to. If everything else can spit fire or is five times as strong as you, inventing the bow would be damn useful!

Anyhow, Claude is mulling this over because he's remembering other ways to identify someone's species. Psychological markers can work, but you really have to know what you're looking for or the behaviour has to be very pronounced to notice it that way. Some species have dead giveaways. For example undead don't feel a need to eat or drink (and most physically can't eat or drink, with a few exceptions) and dryads hate underground spaces because there's no sunlight. Heck, they don't even like being indoors most of the time.

Hence why Manuela conducts her lessons outside. Technically she's a hamadryad (half dryad for the layman) but the same mostly applies to her.

Claude has taken pains to educate him with as many psychological tells from as many different species as he can, but despite that he's still primarily relying on physical markers to figure people out. Even then, he hasn't narrowed things down. Sure, Sylvain, Hubert, and Bernadetta are all pale, but that doesn't tell him much. There are tons of species that are naturally pale. Heck, basically all undead are (un?)naturally pale, and there are all sorts of nocturnal or subterranean species that are pale. So yay, they're pale. That doesn't tell him nearly enough.

His little notebook where he's marking down notes on everyone is annoyingly barren on even the basic elements. He doesn't even have the species for half the people in the main classes! He only has the ones that are blatantly obvious or that no efforts are being made to hide (and Claude knows about Hilda, but she's a special case).

That won't do. He'll have to rectify that this weekend.

"This weekend we're going on a mission." The professor informs them, completely killing Claude's plan. The Ashen Demon stares at his class with a blank expression. Claude doesn't know if the professor can see him peeking at his notebook behind his class notes, so he subtly puts it down just in case. "To kill things."

"Way to soften the blow Teach." Claude snorts when Ignatz yelps and Marianne freezes. He can't help but be sarcastic as he watches. "Don't want to scare them or anything."

"To kill what, exactly?" Lysithea huffs. "Be clear Professor."

"To kill people. By stabbing them in the neck, the heart, or the face. You can also chop their heads off, or their arms, or their legs, or-"

"Okay!" Hilda interrupts loudly, noticing the growing discomfort of Marianne and Ignatz. "We get it Professor."

The man stops and nods. "Good. Just remember: don't die… and kill them all."

"Noted." Lorenz says dryly.

"Truly inspirational Professor." Claude can't help but add with the most obvious sarcasm he can manage. "Thanks for that."

"Thank you." Byleth says, completely missing his students' various states of discomfort and disapproval. "Now, let's go over the headsplitter technique once more…"

Ignatz is probably going to be sick by the end of the night. Claude later gets clarification that their mission is to fight bandits.

###

"This walk is killing me!" Hilda whines. She makes a big show of wiping her brow. "My delicate physique wasn't made for this! Claude, carry me!"

"Oh please, if anything you should be carrying me." Claude snorts. He pokes her bicep. "I know these are deceiving. Try someone else Hilda. Raphael maybe."

"But he's so loud." Hilda huffs. "I mean, he's nice, but loud. He always smells like beef too."

"Hey, he's half-ogre. He needs to eat a lot." Claude reminds her. He doesn't disagree with her though. Raphael does always smell like beef. "Besides, he's already carrying Ignatz."

They're climbing over some rocky terrain, and being as small as he is thanks to being a halfling, Ignatz was having quite a bit of trouble getting around.

"This should be a breeze for you though. Aren't elves good at naturey stuff?" Hilda huffs.

"Hey, I'm half dark elf, not wood elf, and them being good with nature is a stereotype and you know it. They just use a lot of nature magic, they don't have a natural affinity or anything." Claude chuckles. "Though I suppose compared to someone lazy like you, I am good at 'naturey stuff' as you put it."

"So you'll carry me then, right?"

"Only in your dreams."

They journey doesn't get much easier from there. The ground gets a bit less rocky, but in return is starting to be filled with shrubs and trees with exposed, gnarled roots. Byleth is at the front and hacking away branches with his sword when appropriate, but it's still a pain to get through the uneven terrain. Not only that but this part of the forest has several rivers, some of which have carved quite deep gullies into the land which they need to be wary of.

"Why couldn't we have just gone around this forest?" Lorenz grumbles from ahead of them. "Surely there was a better option than this? We could have used our horses to carry out supplies as well."

He's been griping about their large backpacks the entire day. Just under half of the class is arguably weaker than him, yet Marianne, Lysithea, and Ignatz have not said one word about their burden.

"The bandits are in the Red Canyon. We cannot approach from an obvious direction or else they will see us and either flee or ambush us." Byleth responds flatly, still not understanding that Lorenz's complaining is rhetorical. "We need to not be noticed so we-"

"-can kill them all, we get it!" Claude calls up to the front. In a lower voice to Hilda he mutters. "I think he's obsessed."

"No, really?" She snorts.

"Really puts the 'Demon' in his title." Claude chuckles. He twirls around, walking backwards in front of Hilda and trying to keep his face totally neutral. "I'm Byleth, I murder things. Kill them all! I also teach people how to murder things, and only know how to take things literally. Kill them all!"

Hilda's hand comes flying at him, and for a moment he thinks she's going to punch him for mocking the professor. He reflexively flinches back, but it's actually a good thing Hilda can swing her hand faster than he can flee in this case.

Claude yelps when Hilda grabs his collar and effortlessly lifts him into the air with one hand. His hand flashes to his dagger on instinct. Just as quickly as he's picked up though, Hilda puts him down next to her.

"Uh." The boy blinks, trying to ignore the sudden pounding of his heart. He awkwardly re-sheaths his weapon. "What was-?"

"Maybe don't walk backwards near a gully." Hilda hums. It's only at then that Claude glances back and notices that, yes, he nearly just stumbled down a ten foot drop into a rocky stream because he was too busy making fun of the professor.

"Pff, I knew that was there." He lies. He's still trying to calm his heartbeat. "I was going to jump on to the log. Geeze, you worry too much Hilda."

"Uh-huh. Sure." She huffs, stepping onto the log bridge. The person in front of them, Marianne, is just reaching the other side. "If you slip on the log I'll just let you fall then."

"Exactly." Claude knows she's lying of course. She keeps an eye on him as they cross. Not that he really needs it, the only reason he almost fell into that gully was because he literally wasn't looking where he was going. He could blame that on Hilda for distracting him if he wanted.

He could do that, but he'd be lying… and he totally owes her another cake now.

"That proved you should be carrying me instead." He jokes.

"And put in that much effort? No thanks."

###

He would have gone with Hilda, but nooo, they're teenagers, so apparently they can't be trusted with people of the opposite sex. What, does the academy really think everyone can't keep it in their pants for four days? Maybe not Sylvain, but everyone else? It's just Claude's luck that he'd get stuck with the only person he knows who literally glows in the dark as his tentmate.

"Lorenz, could you not…?" He groans.

"I have told you already, I have had no success controlling it." The boy says with obvious annoyance. "You know this."

"That doesn't make it any less annoying." Claude thinks. How is he going to sleep like this? He doesn't have a sleeping mask. Even if he did, he probably wouldn't have brought it with him.

"If it is any reassurance, it is just as annoying for me. It is not like we angels sleep with lights on any more than others do." Lorenz sighs. "Truthfully, I have not gotten proper sleep for weeks because of this."

That makes Claude feel a bit more sympathetic. That's also something he'd like to put in his notebook… but he doesn't want to take it out with Lorenz around. The last thing he needs is the boy seeing his notes and lecturing him about 'invasions of privacy' or 'blackmail' or something.

He'll just have to remember that little tidbit for now until he can write it down.

"If only I could make a big enough orb of darkness I could block out his light." Claude sighs to himself. That's one of the drawbacks of only being half dark elf. His innate magic is significantly weaker. A normal dark elf could make a darkness sphere about three meters in diameter, and that's without practice. "How am I going to get any sleep like this?"

Short answer: he doesn't. Not as much as he wants anyhow.

###

"Stay behind me, stay close to each other, don't die." Byleth orders as they march into the canyon. "The knights of Sieros have handled most of the group, but we are expected to play a part. This is for your education. Stay safe, and kill them all."

This is no big deal for Claude. He's killed before. For some of the other Deer this situation is a bit more… traumatic. Ignatz looks quite pale when one of his arrows finds its mark in a bandit's throat, and Marianne continuously mumbles prayers even before her nosferatu sucks the life of an axeman.

Hilda is just annoyed she's getting blood on her clothes. Her weapon is easily the messiest out of everyone's, being a hammer. It's amusing to Claude that the person who pretends to be frail and weak would choose the single most heavy weapon out there. It's a mordenkrad, a hammer with an oversized head, and the weapon is nearly as tall as Hilda. The head alone is at least twenty pounds, and the weapon as a whole is probably closer to thirty.

"'Weak' huh? Not helping your lie Hilda."

Lysithea, despite being the youngest of them, is also rather unaffected. Her mouth thins into a line when she strikes down her first victim, but that's the extent of her reaction. Leonie and Lorenz's reactions are similar.

It's hard to say what Raphael's reaction is. He's too busy punching the other bandits to worry about his first kill. Maybe that's for the best.

Byleth does surprisingly little. Despite his order to stay behind him, he fights defensively and focuses on giving orders more than killing anything himself. He gives out some debilitating injuries, aiming for the arms mostly, but only kills once or twice, and Claude suspects that's intentional. He's leaving the bulk of the work to them while doing just enough to reduce the danger, and letting them get used to killing. He's helping, not doing the job for them.

Normally Claude would understand that, but in this situation he would appreciate a bit more involvement from him. Not that he thinks they're going to lose; but with lives on the line, maybe a bit of protectiveness would be nice.

They take a small hill on the side of the valley without too much trouble. They're at the very entrance to the valley so it's not very wide across at this point, and Claude can see most of the bandits haven't gone further in.

The most dangerous of the bandits quickly prove not to be the axemen, but the archers. Axemen might look scary, but they're predictable and untrained. Archers though, archers have to be trained (or at least self-taught) or else they wouldn't be able to shoot their bows close to accurately in the first place. A well-placed arrow can be just as fatal as a hit from an axe, and can do so from several dozen of meters away.

Claude would know, that's what he does. That's why he's focusing less on the axemen charging at them and more on the bushes and ridge line looking for those archers. He sees one to his right, peeking over an incline leading down to the canyon proper, and he shoots them immediately. His arrow thankfully flies true; that's one less threat that could hit them unawares.

With no archers obviously around, he turns his attention back to his teammates. He snipes a brigand trying to flank Leonie, who is already in combat, and takes a few potshots at the people fighting Hilda. He has to remind himself to look elsewhere after a dozen seconds, he can't let himself get distracted watching Hilda demolish people.

The fight ends rather abruptly. The lead brigand rushes off a small platform from where he was watching the fight and charges right past their frontline towards Marianne and Lysithea. He knocks aside Leonie when she tries to intercept, and the girl is honestly lucky the man's axe didn't take her head off.

The leader doesn't get far. Byleth's dagger finds home in his neck before he gets even halway to his targets. Claude's arrow is next, followed by Ignatz's. Before realizing he's already dead, Lysithea had fired off a miasma that takes a chunk out of his stomach.

The (extremely unnecessary) coup de grace is Hilda's mordenkrad whistling through the air and obliterating the man's skull with a startlingly accurate throw. It's like watching melon getting crushed, except it's made of bone and the splinters and brains are now splattered all over the ground as well as the hammer head (which has left a small furrow where it landed as well).

"Subtle Hilda!" Claude shouts, grinning.

"Shut up Claude!"

###

"Have you noticed Marianne?" Hilda murmurs. She steps over a tree root and smacks a branch out of her way. They're on the way back to the monastery after their successful mission.

"She's an introvert, not invisible." Claude quips. "So yes."

"Ha ha." Hilda huffs. "No, I mean look at how she's acting."

"Right now?"

"Right now."

So Claude does that. Marianne is directly in front of them, so it's not too hard to observe her as they move.

"Is she… leering at Ignatz?"

"Not just him, she's been doing that towards everyone." Hilda whispers. "Weird, huh?"

Marianne is the last person Claude would expect to do something like that. Almost as if she realizes it herself Marianne flinches and shakes her head, then casts a nervous glance around to see if anyone notices. Claude pointedly averts his gaze to Hilda when Marianne looks their way, and thankfully she doesn't glance back at them for long.

"She looks kinda guilty about it." Claude notes quietly.

"Yeah, something's up." Hilda agrees. "Should I ask her about it…?"

"Hey, I'm not your father." Claude shrugs. "It's up to you."

"Don't implicate you though?"

"Please don't." Claude agrees. "I'm not so sure she'll tell you anything though."

"Yeah." Hilda sighs. "But I'll try anyways."

A day after they get back to the monastery Marianne is back to normal. Claude furiously scribbles that down into his notebook.


Some worldbuilding, some quirks, some hints at quirks. Yeah, this should be a good chapter. I'm having fun with the Claude and Hilda dynamic, can you tell?