18+
XXII
Edward is sitting with her on his lap, laughing at something in the cafeteria.
I watch him as Emmett regales me with some story about some shit that happened some time.
I'm not listening.
He doesn't want her.
That's what he said.
So why.
'Jesus Christ Bella!' Rose snaps suddenly right by my ear.
I turn to her in surprise.
Rose never loses her temper with me. She's always cool, calculated, cutting with carefully chosen words instead of letting them burst, unchecked and unkept.
Her blue eyes are accusing, angry.
'What the fuck?' I voice, crossing my arms.
'Do you ever fucking listen anymore?' She asks, her voice bathed in vitriol.
I glance around for help but Alice looks upset too, and Jasper is avoiding my gaze.
I turn to Emmett and something in my chest lurches painfully.
He looks disappointed, his big eyes sad, his mouth a tight line.
'What the fuck?' I repeat, but it's quiet this time, muted, full of confusion and despair.
'Emmett was trying to tell you that his brother got arrested last night.' Rose spits.
Ah.
So her anger is on behalf of Emmett. That makes more sense.
'I am so sorry Em.' I apologise, placing my hand on his broad chest. 'I have no fucking excuse I wasn't listening, I'm sorry.'
'It's all the time though Bella.' Rose says, her voice back to its calm, acidic velocity, as sharp as glass but with a slight vein of 'who fucking cares, not me'.
I sigh, turning my head and meeting her eyes.
'I'm sorry.' I say again, my voice unsteady all of a sudden. 'I love the fuck out of you guys. I'm just…'
'Hung up on Cullen.' Emmett says angrily.
My mouth falls open and I turn to Jasper accusingly but he holds up his hands.
Rose scoffs. 'Oh please Bella. Do you think we're fucking stupid?'
I look around at them and they all give me a pointed look.
'Fuck.' I mutter.
'Look at him Bella. He doesn't care about you, he's happy with Tanya.'
I follow Rose's eyes to the two of them together and feel my stomach turn.
'I…how long have you…known?' My speech is halted, tentative.
'Does it really matter?' Alice says quietly, tilting her head at me.
I shake my head.
No.
'You are being pathetic Bella.' Rose says icily. 'He's using you.'
'I'm using him too.' I try to argue, but even to me it sounds asinine.
Alice gives me a sympathetic smile and I feel a sudden urge to slap her.
'It's not…I'm just…' I give up and crash my head to the table.
'Right.' Emmett says angrily. 'I'm going to fuck him up.'
I lift my head in panic.
'No! Please Em don't.'
He studies me, those perceptive blue eyes searching mine.
'Fine. But Bella, stay the fuck away from Cullen. He's bad for you.'
I want to laugh.
I'm bad for him too, I want to say. He doesn't love her. He doesn't want her.
But even if my head I know I sound pathetic.
'How can we help you?' Alice asks me gently, her dainty hand running through my hair.
I feel exposed, naked in front of glaring lights, with nowhere to hide.
'It's biology…' I finally say, closing my eyes. 'I can avoid him otherwise but if I'm close to him…he's like my drug. I can't explain it.'
'Then we need to treat you like an addict.' Rose clips, her lips twisting into a sneer.
Bitch.
But I love the shit out of her.
'No contact. From now.' Emmett orders, cracking his knuckles. 'Or I'll hurt him Bella.'
I feel my mouth open at the threat. 'Em…'
'I mean it.' He states calmly.
'But Bio-'
'I'll handle Biology darlin'.' Jasper says, the first words he's uttered out loud the entire day.
I turn to him in surprise. 'How?'
Alice titters, resting her head on Jasper's arm as her hand plays with his hair. 'Ms. Taylor and Jasper go…way back.'
I feel my mouth fall open.
'Fuck me Jas, seriously? She's so goddamn hot.' Emmett mutters.
'Seriously.' Rose agrees, smirking at Jasper. 'How did that happen?'
Jasper shrugs, looking bored.
'After school detention. Over a year ago.' Alice says, grinning again. 'Couldn't help herself.'
I appraise her thoughtfully. 'You don't mind?'
Alice shakes her head. 'Why would I? We weren't exclusive then and he told me about it straight after. In fact it was kind of…hot, knowing that she wanted Jasper so bad but he wants me more.'
'Fair enough.' Rose says in a bored tone, her crystal eyes dart to mine, icy and cold. 'Man the fuck up and stay the hell away from Cullen Bella.'
I nod at her, resting my arms on the table with a sigh.
I hate that I need their help to stay away from him.
'He's looking at her now.' Emmett says angrily.
I don't comment.
I know he's looking.
Can feel the warmth of his gaze in between my legs.
