18+

XLIV

I wander into Biology 5 minutes early, feeling restless and tired.

Teeth and Tits calls me to her, and I frown as she tells me I'm moving seats again.

He wouldn't.

Jasper wouldn't.

But he has.

I almost turn around and walk out of the room again but the expression on Edward's face stops me.

He looks so lost.

I sigh wearily and walk to the back of the room, throwing my bag on the ground with a thump as I get into my chair.

'Angela did it,' Edward says quietly next to me.

My head snaps to his in surprise.

'She said you were bullying her, so Ms. Taylor moved you back.'

I turn away from him to glare daggers at Angela. What the fuck.

'She just wanted to sit with her boyfriend.' Edward says under his breath, clearly amused, 'don't kill her.'

I cross my arms on the table.

'I tried to come over…but you didn't want to see me?' His voice is low.

'No.' I reply curtly.

My eyes almost roll back in my head as his hand touches my lower back, heat blazing through me. I turn to look at him accusingly, but the sight of his green eyes derails me, just like it always does.

'Bella,' Edward murmurs, his hand stroking up my back. 'I can't do this again, please don't shut me out.'

Angela is going to die. I can't do this with him, can't stay away when I'm near him like this.

Edward suddenly moves his hand off my back and I turn to him in surprise.

He cocks his head at me, his eyes soft and sad. 'If you don't want me to touch you, I won't. But please don't shut me out. I need you.'

My breath leaves me in a whoosh, and I feel so ungrounded that I have to close my eyes, everything underneath me suddenly unstable and rocky.

I reach my hand out and sigh as I feel his fingers tangle with mine, everything around me stilling, until all that's left is him and me.

'I'm…sorry,' I say quietly, keeping my eyes shut, 'for running.'

'I'm sorry for making you run.' Edward's voice is soft and careful. 'I shouldn't have done that, with your friends. I didn't mean to…'

'Don't apologise.' I sigh. 'Just…don't apologise.'

'Okay.'

'What do you want from me?' I ask him quietly, opening my eyes and turning my head to him.

Edward's face is a mask, 'Just you.'

I breathe out slowly and then suddenly I'm saying, 'I don't want to share you.'

My heart freezes in my chest. That wasn't what I wanted to say, but it's too late now anyway.

Green eyes search mine, 'Bella, you never shared me.'

Everything stops around me, a roaring in my ears all of a sudden.

'W-what?'

Edward sighs, 'In the whole time, you and I have been doing…this. I've only touched her twice, both times when I thought you'd betrayed me and as cliché as it sounds, I thought of you the whole fucking time.'

My heart stutters. This doesn't make any sense.

None of this makes any sense.

'You…' I can barely speak, 'But…'

Edward lowers his voice, glancing around before leaning closer to me. 'Bella,' he murmurs, 'how could I bear to be with anyone else? You fucking consume me.'

I can't deal with this. I don't know how to deal with this.

I don't make an excuse, I just grab my bag and run, Teeth and Tits calling after me.


A/N To my guest reviewer, who doesn't 'buy' Edward's feelings - I'm really sorry you feel that way, and I won't argue with your interpretation, but I will say...go back and read it again and see if you still feel that way. I'll also say, that this story is from Bella's perspective, not Edward's, and Jasper's opinions are Jasper's opinions, whether they are true or not is down to your interpretation again. Neither B or E is perfect, I think that's pretty clear. Anyway, thank you for sharing your thoughts :) x