The Friendship Algorithm

"Ew, Raj, just…don't do that when your mouth is full," Leonard grumbled as Raj whispered in his ear, his mouth full of pudding. He let out a long sigh, "Raj says the worst tapioca pudding is better than the best pudding of any other flavor."

Claire and Sheldon, who were both sitting next to each other in the University cafeteria with a chocolate pudding cup on their trays gave Raj an unimpressed look, Claire with a spoon hanging out of her mouth and narrowed eyes.

"First off," Sheldon began, "That is axiomatically wrong, because the best pudding is chocolate," he gestured to Claire as she took a purposeful spoonful of her pudding, glaring Raj down as she went, "Secondly, the organic structure of tapioca makes it a jiggling bowl of potential death. It is extracted from the plant…"

"Hey, I'm thinking of growing a mustache," Howard spoke suddenly, as though sensing a Sheldon tangent coming.

"Ah, no kidding!" Leonard went with it, "A Fu Man Chu? A handlebar pencil?"

"It is extracted from the plant…" Sheldon tried to finish.

"I'm not sure yet," Howard cut in, "You know, George Clooney has one now!"

"Guys, just let him finish talking," Claire said as she swallowed her pudding, seeing Sheldon's pursed lips.

"Really?" Leonard looked at Raj as he whispered to him again, ignoring Claire's request, "Raj saw him shopping at Ralph's for tequila."

"Oh, you'd think a guy like that would have some kind of booze lackey," Howard remarked.

"You're being mean," Claire gave them all a chastising look.

Leonard glanced at Sheldon who looked like he was about to burst, "Alright, we better let him finish before his head explodes."

"Alright Sheldon," Howard sighed, "Why is tapioca…"

Sheldon couldn't even let him finish the question, blurting out, "Tapioca is extracted from the root of the plant Manihot Esculenta. Due to a high concentration of cyanide it is poisonous in its raw form and lethal if prepared improperly."

Claire reached out to pat his shoulder, "Feeling better?" Sheldon shook his head frantically, "Go on, Shelly, let it out."

"It is also indigenous to Brazil!" he spoke quickly, as though fearing the others would start to speak over him again, "As is the Cocoa Bean, from which we get chocolate, the best pudding. And you promised you wouldn't do that anymore!" he glared at his so-called friends for the last part.

"Hey Hofstadter!" a voice called before they could reply, Kripke was making his way over to their table.

"Hey Kripke," Leonard greeted.

"Heard about your watest pwoton decay expewiment, twenty thousand data wuns and no statistically significant wesults. Vewy impwessive!"

"What a jerk," Howard muttered as Kripke strode off.

"Thanks, but that doesn't help," Leonard said, more to Raj who had whispered something in his ears, "Negative results are not 'still results.'"

"And you got twenty thousand of 'em," Howard teased.

"Don't let Kripke get to you, Leonard," Claire remarked as she scraped out the last bit of pudding she could from her cup, "Negative results are just as valuable as positive ones. You've found twenty thousand ways that won't work, you just need to keep going till you find the way that does. 'Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.'"

Leonard smiled at her, "Thomas Edison?"

She nodded, "Brilliant guy. Just like some others I know."

"Thank you," Sheldon smiled, not seeming to realize she was taking about the others at the table too.

"Thanks," Leonard offered to Claire anyway, actually feeling better about his research now. It was true, Thomas Edison had failed a number of times to create the lightbulb, but he hadn't let his failures stop him, he'd looked at it as an opportunity to succeed.

"Yeah, don't let someone like Kripke get you down," Howard added, "I mean, look at the guy," he nodded over to where Kripke had gone to sit at a vacant table, "He eats by himself, instead of sitting here at the cool table."

"Well, I don't know about that," Sheldon remarked, "Kripke lacks the basic social skills that we take for granted, but he also controls the new open science grid computer that I need to use to run some simulations of structure formation in the early universe."

"Why would anyone let Kripke control that?" Claire shook her head. As far as she knew, Kripke wasn't that high up on the chain at the University to have a reason to have a say in who used the computer or not.

"Good luck getting time on it," Leonard shook his head, "The only people he lets use it are his friends."

"Well then, the solution is simple," Sheldon stated, "I shall befriend him. Kripke!"

Kripke turned in his chair to look over at them, "Yeah?"

"What'd you say of the idea of you and I becoming friends?"

"I would say, I have no intewest in becoming your fwiend."

"Really? That seems rather short sighted, coming from someone who is generally considered altogether unlikable. Why don't you take some time to reconsider?"

Claire could only shake her head at that. She knew she wasn't exactly the epitome of social interaction either, her nose usually in a book or writing a paper, but even she knew insulting someone was never the best way to start a friendship.

Kripke didn't seem amused by it either, "Yeah, I'll do that."

"Well, I think we're off to a terrific start," Sheldon told them as he turned back around.

"That was sarcasm, Shelly," Claire had to tell him.

"Really?"

"Yup."

"Drat," he huffed, "I thought I was getting better at that."

~8~

Claire was quietly reading in the middle of the couch of the boys' apartment, watching as Penny sat at Leonard's desk, her laptop open, having brought it over for 'help' with setting up something with her emails. SHE had offered to show Penny how to do it, it really wasn't hard to set a filter for incoming mail that automatically deleted or filed them in a specific folder based on the sender or subject. Penny had tried to brush it off, saying that she was clearly busy…even though she'd been sitting on the couch watching a movie adaptation of one of the stories she was teaching in a class for comparisons of the literature vs. media. Penny had already been heading for the door, intending to go over to Leonard's no matter if Claire had been lying there counting ceiling tiles.

So she'd grabbed the book with the story in it and followed. After the stunt Penny had pulled with Underhill to see if Leonard was going to be jealous, to see if he was still interested in her, she had been keeping her eye on the two a bit more. It wasn't that she didn't trust Penny around Leonard, she knew the girl was still very interested in Leonard and wouldn't hurt him. It was just…despite telling Penny to either tell him or show him she wanted to try dating again, Penny seemed to have resorted to her 'tried and true' methods first. Right now it was sort of going to Leonard about every tech thing she could find, no matter how simple. Similar to how, in school, some students would ask to be tutored by their crush or constantly drop things near them so they'd pick it up and talk would follow. She was finding excuses to be around Leonard and get him interacting with him instead of just talking. It wasn't that she didn't trust Penny, but from what she knew of movies, tricks like that either didn't work or blew up in people's faces later.

It was a little ironic that Penny wanted to be an actress and this happened in so many movies, yet she still thought it would work.

"There you go," Leonard finished tapping on the computer, "Now any e-mail from Wolowitz will go right into your spam folder."

"Trash would have been better!" Claire called over. She had Wolowitz emails set on a filter to go right to her trash bin.

"Thanks!" Penny smiled up at him for his help, ignoring Claire's comment, "I mean the e-mail doesn't bother me as much as the vacation pictures of him in a bathing suit."

"Yeah…" Leonard grimaced, recalling that specific set, "I got the same one. And that's not a bathing suit, it's a tan line."

"Ew," Claire and Penny both muttered, shivering in distaste as Penny got up and moved to join her on the couch.

"Hello," they looked over to Sheldon to see he wasn't talking to them but to someone on the phone, "This is Sheldon Cooper. I'm leaving a message for Barry Kripke. Barry, it was pleasant seeing you today in the cafeteria. I saw that you purchased the chef's salad. Apparently, you did not know that the chef's salad is kitchen trickery to utilize scrap meat. Nevertheless, I hope you enjoyed it. I'm following up on our pending friendship, and I look forward to hearing from you regarding its status. Sheldon Cooper."

"What's up with Ichabod?" Penny asked Claire and Leonard when he joined them on the armchair.

"Shelly's trying to make a new friend," Claire told her.

"Oh really? Well, good for him."

"Well, unless he's makes one out of wood like Gepetto," Leonard commented, "I don't think it's gonna happen."

"Don't sell Shelly too short, Leonard," Claire warned him, "He managed to make friends with the three of us."

"Yeah," Penny nodded, thinking on that, "I get Claire, he got her when she was too young to know better. He's just sort of a clueless puppy you can't help but want to help for me. But how did YOU become friends?" she looked at Leonard.

"There was a flier on the bulletin board at the university," he shrugged, "'Roommate wanted. Whistlers need not apply.'"

"…and you moved in anyway?"

"I assumed he was joking. You'd be surprised how many particle physicists have a whimsical side."

"I honestly cannot think of a single one," Claire deadpanned, though, to be fair, she didn't know many particle physicists personally.

"Well, what about Howard and Raj?" Penny continued, "I mean how did you become friends with them?"

"I don't know," he remarked, actually thinking on it, "How do carbon atoms form a benzene ring?"

"Proximity and valence electrons," Claire answered absently, squinting to see that Sheldon was now googling 'how to make friends' on his computer.

"Well…yeah…sure," Penny stumbled, "When you put it that way…"

Claire looked over at her, "Proximity means they were close to each other distance-wise, so they worked in the same close quarters as each other. And valence electrons are electrons along an outer shell of an atom that help with forming a chemical bond. If an atom has valence electrons, it means it CAN bond with other elements."

"So…" Penny said slowly, working it out, "The valence part just means they were willing to be friends with other people?"

"Exactly!" Claire beamed at her, high-fiving the woman when she lifted her hand and whooped for getting the science of it.

"So you and Sheldon didn't bond the same way as you, Howard, and Raj," Penny realized, "But it all worked out, right?"

"I suppose," Leonard admitted, though he was smiling at Penny and paying close attention to how Claire had described the science to her. He really wanted to try and be more aware of how he said things or explained them. What he thought was simple terms, wasn't always he was realizing now, "I do miss whistling though."

"Oh come on, really?"

"I wouldn't tempt fate, Pen," Claire warned, "Shelly's not a fan of high noises. Among the many other issues he has with whistling in general."

"You're not serious…" Penny started to think the two actually WERE.

And then Leonard proved it by whistling and earning an immediate, "First warning!" from Sheldon.

"And that's why I didn't even bother trying to learn how to whistle in the first place," Claire laughed. There was no point in learning something she wasn't going to use.

~8~

"You know," Penny was saying as she spoke to Claire over the phone as the girl was making a quick grocery run and had called to see if there was anything they needed, "Besides more ice cream, there's only one other thing I need. To hear about how exactly YOU ended up friends with Sheldon."

"Penny, we were kids," Claire reminded her, "Kids make friends easy."

"If that were true, Sheldon would have more friends than just you."

Claire sighed, "I was friends with Missy first, so I saw Shelly every so often at her house, but he didn't really talk to no one. He seemed to think I was like Missy if I was her friend. But, one day in art class, Missy was out with a stomach bug, and I was trying to build a teepee out of pipe cleaners. Shelly told me I was doing it wrong."

Penny made a face Claire couldn't see, "And from him insulting you…you ended up friends?"

"It's not insulting to tell someone they're wrong, well not always. I asked him for help since he seemed to know how to do it and he was just…he was so surprised, Pen. Like that was never the reaction he got when he offered his opinion. He sat down and he helped me make it and it was the best one in the class. Shelly never really talked much to the other kids, but he seemed to think it was safe to talk to me, that I wasn't gonna be mean to him like the others. So he did, and talking lead to bonding over things, like books and Professor Proton. He seemed to think I had 'potential' because I actually seemed to pay attention when he talked or tried to explain things and just sort of determined I was his best friend now, not Missy's."

"And you went along with that?" Penny asked, checking the fridge if they needed anything.

"Missy had a ton of friends," Claire said simply, "Shelly didn't have anyone. I thought he could do with a best friend more than Missy could. I was still her friend, I was just Shelly's best friend too. Missy seemed to think he was less annoying when I was hanging around so she wasn't too torn up about it all."

"That girl really is a saint," Penny remarked, thinking on the time she'd met Missy, "If I had a brother like Sheldon I'd…" she was cut off as three knocks sounded on the door.

"Penny!" Sheldon called through it.

"Speak of the devil," Penny murmured.

Three more knocks, "Penny!"

"I'll call you back," she offered Claire before she hung up and headed for the door.

Three more knocks, "Penny!" she opened the door to see Sheldon standing there with a packet of paper he handed to her as soon as she was visible, "This is for you."

She sighed, taking them, "Hello Sheldon."

"Hi."

"What is this?" she looked down at the papers to see a series of multiple choice questions.

"It's a questionnaire I devised. I'm having some difficulty bonding with a colleague at work, so I'm doing a little research to better understand why my current friends like me."

"Yes. Well, that is a good question. But is this really the best way to figure it out?"

"Yeah, I agree, the social sciences are largely hokum. But, short of putting electrodes in your brain and monitoring your response to my companionship, this is the best I can do."

"Ok," Penny shook her head, looking down at the packet, "Question 1. Rank the following aspects of Sheldon Cooper in order of appeal. Intelligence. Ruthless attention to hygiene. Playfulness. Java applet writing?" and looked back up at him, incredulous.

"I know," he nodded, "I may have started off with a fairly obvious one. An aspect of my most appealing trait, playfulness. Why don't you just go ahead and write that number 1. I'm afraid you're on your own for the rest. It should take you no more than 3 hours."

"How many questions are on this thing?!"

"Only 211. Don't worry, in deference to you, I've kept them on a high school graduate reading level."

"Thanks pal," she grumbled.

"You got it, buddy," he returned, not sensing the sarcasm, "Oh! This one's for Claire."

"Seriously?" Penny took the second packet from him, "Don't you already know what she's going to answer?"

"Well, I can wager a very good guess with 98 percent accuracy," Sheldon remarked, "But her perspective and answers to the essays should help me determine what's kept us friends so long besides the contract. I don't want to hold an indefinite friendship with Kripke, so I need to know what traits to avoid showcasing so I can end the friendship once I've gotten access to the open science grid computer."

Penny let out a very long breath, understanding more than ever why Sheldon sometimes had such issue making friends if he didn't intend to keep them, "Sheldon honey, did you ever consider making friends by being, I don't know, pleasant?"

"Well that's certainly a thought-provoking hypothesis. May I suggest it as the topic for your essay."

Penny just shut the door on him.

~8~

"Your questionnaire, very disappointing," Sheldon called out to Leonard as he read through the questionnaires he got back from Raj, Howard, Penny, Claire, and Leonard.

"I answered every question, Sheldon," Leonard waved it off as he tried to get some work done on his computer.

"You answered the multiple choice questions in a pattern. A, B, B, A, C. A, B, B, A, C."

Leonard barely kept a smirk off his face, "You picked up on that huh?"

"How could I not?"

"Come on!" he sighed, turning to face Sheldon as the man at on the couch grading the papers, "There's over 200 questions. And look at some of these things," he got up to grab one off the table, reading an example, "Sheldon is to camaraderie, as the space shuttle is to blank?"

"There are a number of acceptable answers, for example, C: near earth transport, but certainly not B: avocado rancher. And your essay? Suggesting that I'd have better luck making friends if I wait 'til the Cylons take over? Please."

"Hold on. I put some real work into that!"

"Yes, well, it's a poor excuse for work compared to Claire's," Sheldon remarked, though Leonard rolled his eyes, already having expected Claire would ace Sheldon's little test, "Still, it IS better than what Wolowitz did. He drew a raccoon with what appears to be a distended scrotum."

Leonard tilted his head as he eyed the drawing Sheldon was holding up, "It's kinda cute, until you get to the scrotum."

"What hope do I have for establishing new relationships given that my current friends apparently cannot take a few hours out of their lives to help me? The only one of you that made any effort is Claire, though that does not surprise me. Her essay about a trait she enjoys is four pages long, Leonard. Raj barely mustered a paragraph."

"Well, she HAS been your friend the longest. She's used to your madness."

"I'm not crazy," Sheldon huffed, "My mother had me tested. I just don't understand why the rest of you couldn't put in the same effort."

"Sheldon, I'm not going to defend a big-balled raccoon."

"I don't see how you could."

"What I'm trying to say is that, maybe you can't approach this as a purely intellectual exercise."

"What do you mean!?"

"Well, remember when you tried to learn how to swim using the internet?"

"I did learn how to swim."

"On the floor."

"The skills are transferrable. I just have no interest in going in the water. And, before you say anything, Claire does not have that interest either. She's remarkably aware of the dangers of UV light and its adverse affects on skin health."

"But does she know how to swim?"

"Yes."

"But then why did either of you learn if you are never going in the water or to the beach?"

"The ice caps are melting, Leonard. In the future, swimming isn't going to be optional. But you do bring up an interesting point. I don't have to break new ground here, I'm sure much of the research already exists."

"No!" Leonard groaned, "No, my point is, if you want to learn how to make friends, then just go out to a coffee shop or a museum. Meet people. Talk to them. Take an interest in their lives."

"But I don't have an interest in their lives."

"Oh, so you're not interested in Claire's life?" Leonard asked, trying to take a leaf out of Claire's book and make his question about something relevant to him so he might see how ridiculous he sounded.

"Of course I'm interested in her life, Leonard. She's my best friend. I'm contractually obligated to be interested in her."

Leonard blinked at that, a small frown coming to his face. The words made sense, though they were phrased just a little…oddly to him. That Sheldon would specifically say 'be interested in her' as opposed to 'be interested in her life.' But it wasn't just that, there was this…tone…to Sheldon's words that was throwing him off. It sounded defensive, but not overly so. He wasn't offended by the question, but it sounded more like he was using the contract as an explanation, but, at the same time, as an excuse for something too. But Sheldon said it so casually, he didn't know what that something was.

"Come again?"

Sheldon huffed, "I said, of course I'm interested in her life, Leonard. She's my best friend. I'm contractually obligated to be interested in her life."

Leonard shook his head, he must have just misheard him the first time. There was no way Sheldon Cooper was admitting he was interested-interested in someone in that way.

"And besides," Sheldon continued, getting up and moving to grab his jacket, "Taking an interest in anyone else's life is just insane on the face of it. Come on."

"Where are we going?" Leonard groaned, knowing he'd be the one stuck driving Sheldon.

"You're driving me to the mall. I'm going to acquire a book that summarizes the current theories in the field of friend-making."

"Why don't you just lie down on the floor and swim there?"

"That would get me nowhere as there's no water to transverse through."

Leonard rubbed his head, "Doesn't Claire have a book or something she can lend you?"

"Perhaps. But the last book she gave me to help with every day conversing went nowhere. I need to research the other possibilities of source materials for my research."

"Great."

~8~

"I'm sorry," Leonard spoke, "Can we please just do it one more time?"

Claire laughed, chewing on some of her Chinese food as she sat on the armrest of the couch, Penny across from her on a wooden chair, munching on her own food. The guys had been taking advantage of Sheldon being out with Kripke, still working on his 'friendship' with the man, and had been whistling songs since the food arrived.

"Ok," Howard nodded, "1, 2, 1, 2, 3 and…"

Claire clapped as Howard, Leonard, and Raj began to whistle 'Sweet Georgia Brown' together and sounding quite good, "Bravo!"

"It's a little thing but you really do miss it," Leonard remarked, the trio finishing only moments before Sheldon entered the room with Kripke.

"Hello, everyone," Sheldon greeted, "I brought my new friend, Barry Kripke, home for dinner."

"Oh…" they all murmured, wondering how this was going to go. Sheldon was notorious about not sharing his food, but they hadn't ordered for an extra person. That, and none of them were big fans of the man in general. Kripke was a good researcher, but his attitude and how he treated not just Sheldon but the other guys did not earn him any points with Claire or Penny, who had heard Sheldon AND Claire complain about the man.

"Hewo to you, too," Kripke remarked dryly, very clearly aware that they weren't pleased to see him, but not caring very much. He'd only agreed to this for the free food.

"How was rock climbing?" Leonard asked.

Claire started coughing, choking on the dumpling she was eating. She was attempting to do an experiment of her own. She was slowly working her way through the menu of different restaurants they got takeout from. Determining what she liked and didn't like. And then she was going to put it on a spinning wheel or make a list with a 20-sided dice, and use that to help her pick what to eat instead of taking an hour to work it out each time.

But that wasn't really at the forefront of her mind right now, it was the fact that Leonard had just said Sheldon had gone rock climbing.

"You did what, Shelly?" she looked to the man.

"We went rock climbing," Sheldon repeated, not sure if she just hadn't heard Leonard.

"Yeah, 'we' did," Kripke rolled his eyes, moving over to the couch and plopping down right next to Claire, "He passed out. Just hung there like a big sawami."

Sheldon frowned as he, too, had approached the couch to sit but Kripke beat him to it, "That's where I sit."

Kripke gave him a look, "Ooh, you have a special spot. What kind of wacko are you?" he at least moved to the middle of the couch.

"How much time you got?" Howard asked, seriously, from where he was sitting on the end of the couch.

"Want some Chinese food?" Leonard offered, leaning in from the armchair to offer him some.

"Tewific," he nodded, "Got any dental fwoss?"

"In the bathroom."

"Be right back," Kripke stood, "I gotta fwoss the Indian food out of my teeth if I'm gonna eat Chinese."

"Ew," Claire muttered under her breath as Kripke left the room in the direction Leonard had pointed. But she turned to Sheldon soon after, "You passed out, Shelly?"

"You ok?" Penny asked as well, leaning forward, concerned.

"Oh yes, I pass out all the time," Sheldon waved it off.

Penny and Leonard turned to Claire for that, not sure if he was being serious or playing it off so as not to make the fact he'd gotten so scared climbing a wall seem more humiliating. She sighed, "He does. Remember Christmas?" she looked to Penny.

Shortly after he'd hugged Penny he'd started hyperventilating over all of it and passed out right on top of the bath baskets he'd gotten her. The switch of going from overly excited to still had been too much and the suddenly drop had made him drop.

"Anyway, it was worth it," Sheldon continued, "I've made substantial progress in bonding with Kripke, which brings me to an awkward moment."

"What's that?" Leonard asked, unable to think of anything that could be more awkward than all of them having to have dinner with someone like Kripke.

"Maintaining five friendships promises to be a Herculean task. So, I'm going to have to let one of you go."

Raj looked confused at that, starting to point around at them all, counting. Himself, Howard, Leonard, Penny, Claire, and, if he was understanding it right, Kripke. He quickly leaned over to whisper to Howard.

"Good point," he muttered, looking to Sheldon, "FIVE friendships? If you add Kripke, there's six of us."

Sheldon glanced around, seemingly as confused as Raj had been, before realizing and rolling his eyes with a huff, "Claire doesn't count."

"But she's your best friend," Penny pointed out, "You've got a contract thingie and everything."

"Yes," he said, as though it explained everything, "My friendship with her requires no maintenance. And the contract guarantees it will last until we're both dead and buried, longer if they manage to advance science enough to transfer our consciousness into robots."

"Ok, started off sweet, sort of lost it there at the end," Penny murmured.

"I would choose her over all of you if I did have to count her," Sheldon continued, "Therefore, I need to choose one of the rest of you to remove and replace with Kripke."

"Me, me," Howard nearly begged, "Let it be me."

"Leonard, you are my roommate, my source of transportation and you help me fold my sheets when they come out of the dryer. You are safe."

"Can I whistle?" Leonard asked.

"Don't be silly. Howard, you do not have a PhD, your cologne is an assault on the senses and you're not available for video games during the Jewish high holidays."

"Guilty as charged," Howard admitted, "Guess I'm out."

"No. You, too, are safe."

"Oh come on. What do I have to do?"

"Yeah, what does he have to do?" Claire joked as Penny laughed a little, both recalling Howard's last interaction with Penny where she'd punched him in the face for coming on to her.

"Penny…" Sheldon began, but Penny cut in.

"Ok, you know what?" she sighed, though she didn't seem upset, "I see where this is going. I'm not one of you guys. I'm not a scientist. So just…"

"Penny, Penny, Penny," Sheldon shook his head, "Everything you're saying is true, but please allow me to continue. You are Claire Bear's roommate and, as I've come to understand, her friend. If I kicked you out, you would still be my friend by association and, therefore, still counted among my friends."

"I'm not sure if I should be happy or not right now?" Penny glanced at Leonard and Claire for it.

On the one hand, she was glad that Sheldon recognized Claire had more friends than just him, and she was really touched that Claire considered her a friend, because there was NO way Sheldon Cooper would think she and Claire were friends unless the girl had specifically told him at one point or another, he was that oblivious. But, on the other hand…she was never going to escape Sheldon ever due to her friendship with Claire.

Then again…if she and Leonard got back together (or actually dated-dated), she'd still be stuck with Sheldon as long as the two were roommates so it didn't really matter right now, did it?

She bit her lip to keep from talking after another thought struck her, a sweeter one. Sheldon's friendship with Claire was clearly important to him, so much so that, when it came time to consider if he should remove one of his friends from his 'social circle' she didn't even factor into that decision. He was not going to sacrifice his friendship with Claire for anything. And that was really sweet. But even more so…he wasn't going to do anything that would upset Claire either. SHE was friends with Claire, if Sheldon cut her off from being friends with HIM, it would put Claire in an awkward spot, much like when they'd been feuding, and Sheldon would rather avoid that than cut off the most logical choice in terms of ending a friendship. Claire clearly meant a lot to him.

Now she just needed to figure out a way to test how much more she meant to him and if that translated in a more-than-friends way too...

"Raj, you're out," Sheldon continued before Claire or Leonard could respond to her remark, Raj actually stood up at that, opening his arms as though to ask 'what the hell' which Sheldon was all too ready to answer, "The good question, while you do provide a certain cultural diversity to an otherwise homogeneous group, your responses to the questionnaire were truly disturbing. How could you, for a moment, think that my favorite amino acid is Glutamine?"

Claire had to hide a snort behind her hand at how utterly offended Sheldon sounded at the thought of that being his favorite amino acid.

Raj quickly made his way over to Leonard, whispering in his ear, "He had Lysine but changed it."

"Yeah. Shoulda, woulda coulda, Raj."

They looked over as Kripke reentered the room, "I like to fwoss before I eat, so my gum pockets are open for new food."

"Ew," Penny spoke this time as Kripke plopped down on the ground between the couch and the armchair, forcing Claire to squirm and wiggle to make room for him, which she wasn't pleased with.

"Hewo," Kripke smirked at Penny, "How did I walk past you? I'm Bawy."

"Penny," she grimaced.

"Yeah, it's not a vewy hot name. Not as bad as Cwaiwe though," he shrugged as Claire rolled her eyes, well she had never heard her name pronounced quite like that before, "I'm gonna call your Woxanne. Ooh, pot stickers!" he reached out to take one off a small plate before him.

"Suddenly I'm looking pretty good, huh?" Howard remarked to Penny who rolled her eyes. No one could make Howard look good.

"So uh, Kripke," Sheldon began, "I was wondering if there's any chance you could get me some time on the open science grid computer."

"No," the man answered easily.

"No? But we're friends!"

"I'm sowy," he moved to correct it, though he sounded confused, "No...my fwiend?"

"I'm confused. I was given an understanding that you allow your friends time on the machine?"

"No, that's wong. There's an official schedule. I have no contwol over it."

"Oh. This entire endeavor seems to have been an exercise in futility. Raj," he reached out, taking the plate of pot stickers from Kripke to give to Raj as a peace offering, "You're back in. He likes monkeys," he added to Kripke as explanation.

Claire smirked behind a dumpling and nudge Kripke with her foot in a soft kick, "You're cramping my leg. Move."

Kripke rolled his eyes but scooted forward to make space.

~8~

"Oh Shelly," Claire sighed as she stood with Howard, Raj, and Leonard in the rock climbing area of a gym, looking up at Sheldon.

"You gotta give him credit for sticking with it," Howard remarked.

"I didn't think he had it in him," Leonard murmured.

Raj, who was on the other side of the men and couldn't see Claire from that angle, nodded, "He almost made it to the top this time."

They could only shake their head as they looked up at Sheldon dangling in midair from his rock climbing ropes, having passed out once more.

A/N: Little bit of Claire-Leonard friendship there, little bit of Claire-Penny friendship too which Sheldon seems to possibly approve of, and a bit of another Freudian slip for Sheldon with his interest in Claire...'s life ;) ;) Oh Sheldon, you oblivious puppy :)

Some notes on reviews...

I'm really glad you like Claire :) I really try to balance her smarts with just having a joy for new and interesting things. I feel like she's learned to really look at and appreciate things through her friendship with Sheldon. As a kid, she probably had to grow up a bit more quickly, with someone so smart and mature as Sheldon could be at times, but also dealing with things like taking care of herself at home and dealing with people being mean or cruel to Sheldon. So now, as an adult, she can appreciate things and the effort people put into them. Penny is passionate about acting, Claire will support it and take an interest, Sheldon and the boys build a robot, awesome, a ton of effort there. I feel like she's seen Sheldon trying to express himself or get really excited about things only to have others ignore him or tell him to be quiet or scoff at his interests, and the worst thing you could do is shoot down someone for their interests and something they're passionate about. So she always tries to look at things in a sense of 'this is important to them, this is something they put effort into, this is something they're passionate about, encourage it, don't destroy it' and I think that comes out from her teaching too. She's the only one among the group that is a literal professor, not just a researcher. So she's even more aware of how others react to things. I really try to balance her maturity with a sense of wonder and openness and support, so I'm really glad that comes across :)

I agree, Howard deserved it after others telling him and trying to make it clear they were not comfortable with his advances for so long. Always tricky when it's among friends, who takes who's side, how do they do it, how can it be resolved without either side having to take back valid points :/

I'm glad you're enjoying the stories so far :D I can see how Claire and Leonard could work and I have a few twists and 'kinda-sorta' moments for them to come, sort of in terms of a 'would we work?/who will get jealous?/friendship-mistaken-for-more' type thing and going through a few points to get to a balance for everyone ;) I try not to take more than about a week/a week and a half to update a story. I rotate this one with 4 others and only post M/W/F so far so it usually translates to about a week and a half between updates ;)

I wonder that about Howard too. I feel like he would have been controlling MONTE and maybe got it to last a bit longer, but then just go 'NOOOOOOOO!' while sinking to his knees and reaching out for the bot to pat it's broken pieces like 'You did good, boy, you did good. You can rest now' And then maybe swearing revenge on Kripke lol :)

I can say I do have a moment or two planned for Claire and Leonard where it's one of those 'ARE they on a date...or is it a misunderstanding...or is it to spite/make others jealous' thing ;) I think part of Claire's support is seeing Sheldon's interests and passions be poked at and made fun of for most of his life. If someone is truly passionate about a hobby and puts a lot of effort into it, it should be encouraged, not shot down. So that's sort of her way of showing that even though SHE's not interested in it to that degree, she thinks it's great that they are and that their effort is appreciated by others :)

It may take a while for Claire and Sheldon to 'get together' though I can say I have some interesting moments planned when Amy comes around ;)