Effie…what the hell was she thinking coming back here and then leaving just like that? She didn't even said goodbye after just showing up. How rude of her? I thought she's all about manners. I know I said some hurtful things but she can't blame me for that. It's true. We moved on. We tried our best to put the games behind us by cutting those people connected to it. We chose to not write back to Effie and it worked. It helped with the nightmares. It was working and then she came back.
She's smoking now. She never smoked a day in her life before. When our tributes died, no matter how upset she was, she didn't even touch my alcohol. She confined herself inside her room where I know she spent the night crying. Now, she is smoking.
It's a habit I picked up along the way.
Her tone was so flat and sad. She used to be cheerful and bubbly to the point it was annoying. After we rescued her, she kept it professional. She remained Katniss' escort and helped her with propos but she stopped making personal conversation. She stopped talking out of randomness. She only spoke when someone's asking her something. I never had the time to ask her how's she feeling because we got a lot on our plate. Katniss told me once about the vacant look in her eyes but even with that, I didn't do anything.
I told her not to be a stranger and she did her best. I chose to be a stranger.
The people in the Capitol already informed me of that and it's great that the people from District 12 feel the same way about me too.
The Capitol citizens don't like her? That's impossible. She's the darling of the Capitol. Everyone knows that. They all adore her. Men in the Capitol fantasized about her. Then, I remembered how Snow threw her in prison for being associated with us. She didn't know anything and they locked her up in a dark cell. They told me they found her there all beaten up and no clothes at all. Not once I asked her about that too. It's like, I forgot about her. I focused all my energy on the war. Plutarch and I fought for Coin to keep her alive and after that, I left everything to Plutarch.
"Where is she?" Peeta asked.
"She left. She rode the train to Capitol this morning", I answered.
I can feel his eyes following me as well as Katniss'. I looked back at them and I saw anger building up in him.
"What?" I asked.
"It's Effie. She took care of us during those times and even you're unbearable to be around with, she stuck with you. She took care of you when you're passed out. It's not her job to be our nanny but she did it anyway. She wrote us letters for three months straight and despite us not writing back to her, she still came here to check on us and you managed to say those things to her face? I thought you couldn't do anything worse but you just outdone yourself", Peeta answered.
"Peeta, come on, we should go", Katniss said.
They were about to leave when Peeta stopped and turned back to me.
"Johanna was detained just across Effie's cell for three days. Effie doesn't know that because it's too dark but Johanna knows it was Effie because she can hear her singing that favorite song of hers when the Peacekeepers weren't around. She said that every night, they would question her and beat her for not knowing anything about the rebellion. After that, they would start doing things to her. Johanna couldn't see anything but she knew what they're doing. She could hear Effie begging them to stop but they never did. Have you ever think that maybe it's not just us who needed to move on? Have you ever think that maybe we should've included her and not shut her out like this?" he exclaimed before leaving with Katniss.
Damn it! I knew he will be upset because of this. He always likes Effie. Perhaps he should call her just to let her know he's sorry. He is sorry. He waited for hours before he got the courage to finally do it.
"Goddamn it…" I muttered and walked towards the phone when it suddenly rang. I picked up.
"Yeah?" I answered.
"Haymitch, what the hell did you do?" Plutarch exclaimed over the phone.
"Plutarch? What are you talking about?" I asked.
"I sent Effie there so she can have a nice vacation to heal and be happy for once. Now, I found her inside her apartment unconscious, barely breathing", he answered.
Shock filled me.
"What?" I asked again.
"She took a whole bottle of pills and chased it with vodka. I have to rush her to the hospital. She's still unconscious and the doctor hasn't said anything to me yet. What happened? I know it was you", Plutarch answered and then asked me back.
Effie just tried to kill herself. That thought had a hard time registering in my head. Plutarch will never lie about this. He knows me too well. This isn't a ploy to get me to humble myself. This is real.
"I'll be there", I muttered and hung up.
I packed up my bag as quickly as I can and then ran outside where Katniss and Peeta caught me.
"Where are you going?" she asked.
"…to the Capitol", I answered.
"What? What are you going to do in that place?" she asked again.
"I'm going to see Effie. I don't have time for this, okay? I'll be back soon. I really need to go", I answered.
I turned and saw Peeta nodding at me. He's still mad but he approves that I will be going there to see her. Of course, I didn't tell them that she just tried to kill herself because they will never forgive me.
"Alright, be careful", Katniss said.
"Thank you", I said and then leave.
