You got my letter. I'm glad, he said.
Get to the point. Why are you here? Johanna Mason is in town. You'll be dead if she finds you here, I said.
Feisty as ever…I didn't come here for her. I got a job for you, he said.
Stop right there. I am not your prisoner anymore so I don't need to follow everything you said, I cut him off.
A smile played upon his lips.
You are always my prisoner, Effie. You and I were so good together. If only your husband knows how many people you killed…now, that would be interesting scene to watch, he taunted.
Are you blackmailing me, Kyle? I protected your ass from Paylor. I'm not the only one with secrets here, I said.
Sure, darling but I don't care about Paylor anymore. You care about Abernathy and those two victors you love so dearly. Imagine what they will think of you once they find out you didn't only give up your friends' names, you also killed them, poisoned them until they ran out of breath. What do you think they will say when they find out those other rebels you killed in prison? He asked.
You made me do it! It was the only way to stop you from drugging Johanna and Peeta. I have to do it, I justified.
I know that but your victors don't. Stories can be twisted. Paylor is still after you and just looking a way to get you back in prison. One word is all it will take, he said.
I took a deep breath.
What do you want me to do? I asked surrendering to him.
That's my girl. It's very simple and attainable. I want you to kill Plutarch Heavensbee, he answered.
Plutarch…why would he want him to be dead? Knowing Kyle, it's for his personal gain. He was part of the games and I should've given his name as well but he protected my ass when he found out I knew about the rebellion. Of course, he used that many times on me to make me do things I don't want to. Now, he's doing it again. A thought occurred to me. Promotion. He wanted Plutarch dead so he can take his place in the new government. It will put him again in position and power. He just need to get Plutarch out of the way.
"Are you kidding me? You can't do that. The man took care of you!" Johanna yelled that it hurt my ears.
"Don't you think I didn't know that?" I asked her.
"…but you said yes either way", she snapped.
I did say yes. What am I supposed to say? He will expose me not only to Haymitch, Katniss and Peeta but also to Paylor and I will be imprisoned again. I don't want to go back there again. I don't think I can take it. Before I can say anything, I heard the door opened.
"Why did you say yes, princess?" Haymitch asked.
I turned to him and saw Katniss and Peeta next to him and judging the looks on their faces, they've been listening for a while.
"Yes to what, dear?" I asked pretending not to know a thing.
"Cut it. We saw you at the bar with that man. We followed you here. Why does he want you to kill Plutarch and why you?" Haymitch fired.
I am so screwed.
"…because he cannot get to him and I can", I answered.
That made sense. It should.
"Well, he came to the wrong person. You're no killer. He should've known that", Peeta muttered but stopped when he noticed something else. "You can't do a thing like that, right Effie?" he asked.
I felt Johanna's hand on my back for support.
"I'm capable of things I'm not proud of. Prison can turn a person into something unimaginable, I feared", I answered vaguely but he got it.
Johanna tensed behind me. She knows all of these. She's the only who does.
"Johanna?" Katniss called her attention. She knows I'm not going to tell them everything.
"Those tortures Peeta and I endured, as well as Annie…those times when it felt they will not end. They did end and that was because of Effie", she said hesitantly.
"What did you do, Effie?" Peeta asked with a serious tone.
I don't have a choice. I am cornered and there's no way out.
"I killed some people in prison", I answered bluntly and that made the three of them frowned and flinched. "It's the only way. They would've killed you after you warned District 13. They would've kept electrocuting Johanna until they killed her. I have to make them stop so I did what they asked. It was another form of torture for me, tainting my soul was what they called it. It's horrible but I will do it again if that's what it takes to protect you", I added.
I saw Katniss' eyes shine. She's holding back her tears.
"You can tell Kyle to fuck off because you are not killing anyone anymore. He doesn't have any control over you anymore. You're free", Haymitch intervened.
I wish I can believe that and everything will be fine but it's not. I cannot tell him the entire truth. He will be shattered. I killed a lot of people. Probably more than he did. I killed my fellow Capitol citizen. I killed rebels. I am a murderer. He cannot know it all so I composed myself and nodded my head. I trained for years to put a face to everyone. This is no different.
"You're right. I am free now. I'm sorry", I said.
Katniss and Peeta sighed in relief while Haymitch acknowledged what I said.
"It's not your fault, sweetheart", he muttered.
Oh, but it is…and I know I cannot stop Kyle either. I am trapped once again.
