The fact that Haymitch thought it was me who killed Kyle felt worse than being whipped on my back by the Peacekeepers. It's why I don't want him to know what I did back then because he will see me as a monster. He will change towards me. Katniss and Peeta asked questions about it especially the young boy but it's out of curiosity. I talked to Peeta long and hard to make him feel that it's not his fault. I did it for him and Johanna and I would gladly do it again to spare them the pain. Of course, I expected Johanna to do something like that. She hated Kyle. When Peeta was taken from our block so they could use him for their own propos, Johanna was the only one left to see the things Kyle did to me and made me do.
"Eff…" Haymitch was about to apologize but I know how painful it is for him to do so.
"It's fine", I cut him off just to spare him the agony of going through it.
I should've expected this kind of reaction from him. Now that he knows I am capable of such thing, it's not rocket science for him to assume it was me who killed Kyle. Still, it hurts a lot. Katniss and Peeta came in the house with breads from the bakery and immediately felt the tension between the three of us.
"What's wrong?" Katniss was first to ask.
"Everything's fine, dear", I lied and she knows it.
Haymitch kept his eyes on me, reading my face, searching for something other than my fake smile to the kids. The realization of Johanna killed a Capitol citizen who worked for Paylor's government hit me and there's work to be done.
"Did you touch anything in that room, Jo?" I asked her calmly.
She thought about it for a moment and then shook her head. She was wearing a glove. Haymitch said he didn't touch a thing so that clears him too.
"Mind filling us in?" Peeta intervened but none of us has the energy for it yet.
"I'll make some calls and get this clean up. You will not end up in jail, Jo. I promise. Do me a favor. Next time I asked you not to do things, please oblige. I don't want to do this again", I said to the young lady who for the first time didn't lash out or make snarky come backs. She nodded her head and looked incredibly sorry, not for what she did, but for disobeying me.
I left the room to make some calls in the bedroom. I know Peeta and Katniss will launch a full on interrogation session downstairs so I need private space. I dialed on the phone and waited for someone to pick it up.
"Who is this?" he asked.
"It's Effie Trinket", I answered.
"Well, never thought I will hear your voice again, Trinket. What's up?" he asked again.
"I need a favor. Something happened and I need your cleaning expertise. I need a full sweep, no trace left behind", I answered.
I heard him laughed on the other line.
"Jeez…so that speech about turning your life around and wanting to be better was all bullshit then? You didn't bother showing up before leaving the Capitol and now you're calling to hire my services. Who is the lucky bastard?" he chuckled.
"Kyle Hartfield", I answered briefly and there's silence.
"For fuck's sake, Trinket. Of all people you could've killed, you chose Kyle Hartfield. Do you have a death wish?" he exclaimed.
I knew he will react this way. He's always been so protective of me and I never understood why.
"Will you do it or not, Lucas? I don't have much time before they find him", I asked impatiently.
"Fine. Fine. Where are you?" he agreed and asked.
"I'm in District 12. The body is at the hotel room", I answered.
"Wow, nice place. I'll be there by dawn. Meet me tomorrow night", he said and then hung up.
I put the phone down and took a deep breath. A pill sounds really good to me now. Cigarette won't cut it and I don't want to be drunk. I just want to get high and put my head in the clouds for a few hours until it's over. It's been awhile since I longed for pills. I haven't thought about it since I came here to 12. I relied heavily on my cigarettes but now even them won't suffice.
"Who's Lucas?" Haymitch asked by the door.
Is this his new hobby now?
"Do you always listen to my conversation? That is extremely rude and you know that", I snapped but he ignored it. He's waiting for my answer. "He's an acquaintance of mine", I answered vaguely.
"So, his job is to clean up dead body? Clean up crime scene?" he asked.
"Pretty much but he does other things too. He's a nice guy. He's always been nice to me", I answered.
That didn't convince him. I can see the hidden disgust in his face while I talked about Lucas.
"How did you end up running with that kind of people, princess?" he asked in disbelief.
This is something I cannot believe. He is judging me still.
"Surviving the Capitol when everyone living in there hate me is tough, Haymitch. Do you have any idea how many times people tried to break in to my apartment and attacked me? People like Lucas saved me and took care of me when I felt like I was about to explode. They're good people. Yes, they have odd jobs but it doesn't make them bad people. Sometimes people gotta do what they have to in order to survive. You of all people should know that so stop passing judgments on me, Haymitch, because we're not so different at all", I exclaimed unable to keep it inside.
He didn't say anything afterwards so I walked past him and left the room.
