A/N: I hope everyone has a great Thanksgiving and I'll see you for the next update. Please review so that I know that you guys like what I'm doing so far. Thanks! Love, Ellivia22
Disclaimer: If I owned Teen Titans, I would've written "The End" trilogy different. And I might still do that as an addon/sequel to "A Kiss Too Late". We'll see :)
I'll Be
Part IV
Raven
The next Titan on my list is Cyborg. I don't go to him right away. I had to do a quick meditation first. Since my conversation with Starfire didn't go well I need to be extra prepared to talk to Cyborg. He and Beast Boy have been best friends from the beginning. Yet the fact that Cyborg was willing to put him down without hesitation I have a feeling that it's going to be more difficult to get through to him.
The entire ride in the elevator to the basement I pace back and forth, trying to get my words together. I've got to get him to see how much he's hurt Beast Boy; to see that he has no right to judge who I want to date. I just hope that he'll be willing to listen to me. The elevator makes an abrupt stop, the jolt making me almost lose my balance.
I enter the garage, the smell of motor oil invading my nostrils. I figured Cyborg would be here. Sure enough the metal man is leaning under the opened hood of the T-car. Probably doing an oil change, judging by the smell. I clear my throat to get his attention. He looks up from what he's doing and notices me standing there. "Raven! Perfect timing. I need an extra set of hands."
I don't move. "I'm not here to help," I barely manage to say in my usual monotone. It infuriates me that Cyborg is acting normal when everything is so wrong. "I'm here to find out what happened to make you hate your best friend so much."
Cyborg refuses to meet my piercing gaze. "I don't hate him."
I fold my arms across my chest. "You could've fooled me. You weren't exactly warm towards Beast Boy last night."
He straightens up from behind the hood of the car but continues to avoid looking at me. "Don't be mad, Rae. I can explain."
"Explain what?! For years you two were the best of friends. Now all of a sudden you think Beast Boy is not worth my time? Why? If this is about the chemicals at the lab you of all people should know that he wasn't acting normal. And you of all people should know that he's all better. You mixed the antidote!"
"My reasons are my own. I'm just trying to protect you, Raven. That's all."
The anger is building fast it's getting hard to control. I grit my teeth to remain calm. I don't understand why everyone thinks that Beast Boy is such a threat that I need to be protected. What makes him think I need protection anyway? I can take care of myself. "Protect me from what, exactly," I ask, my voice rising slightly. The paint cans on the top shelf located by the elevator start to shake from my magic. At this point I don't want to calm myself. "I told you he didn't hurt me! Why don't you just stop with the crap and tell me the truth!"
Cyborg doesn't hesitate. Like a light switch, his demeanor changes from concerned older brother to angry and resentful. "Because he's a useless addition to the team. He never takes anything seriously. Admit it, Raven, the main reason we fail at missions is because of him. Not to mention he almost destroyed me because he was being so stupid. It would be better for the team if he would just leave and never come back!"
I stare at him. Have I been sent to an alternate dimension without my knowledge? It's the only explanation I can come up with to describe everyone's strange behavior. Unfortunately I know that it's not the case. "I'll admit Beast Boy does screw up a lot, but we all have made mistakes. As for the virus, yes, he was being stupid and risked your life. But don't forget he fixed his mistake and saved you. Nobody is perfect, Cyborg. We all have our flaws."
His expression doesn't change. I can sense the deep resentment in his emotions. There is another reason why he's so angry at Beast Boy. Obviously he's not going to tell me what it is. I decide to change the subject slightly. Maybe this will get him to see reason at last.
"Well whatever your reason is it doesn't excuse the way you've been treating Beast Boy. Whatever he's done doesn't justify hurting him so much that he can't come to his own best friend for comfort. He's been feeling so alone he almost committed suicide last night!"
For the first time Cyborg meets my gaze. His human eye grows huge. "WHAT?!"
"You heard me." My face remains blank, but I feel relieved on the inside that Cyborg is showing a sign that he still cares about Beast Boy. "He almost shot himself in the head after you guys left for the carnival. I-If I hadn't come in time," I swallow hard. Just thinking about last night's events again rattles my emotions. A tear falls quickly down my face. I don't bother wiping it away. "He needs you, Cyborg. I'm begging you. Please talk to him."
Without another word I turn and enter the elevator again. I lean against the back, closing my eyes. This whole conversation has been absolutely exhausting. To calm myself down I decide to check on Beast Boy. I can't feel his emotions very well, indicating that he's not in the tower. The last time I checked on him he was in his room. Better, but still thoroughly miserable. I hope with all my heart that he's okay. I have one Titan left to talk to. Robin. I'm not looking forward to that conversation at all. He's the one who has shown the most disdain towards Beast Boy since the green Titan got doused by the chemicals at the lab. It's going to be nearly impossible to get the Boy Wonder to see reason. I have to try. If I can get Robin to forgive Beast Boy, maybe the others will follow suit. It's the only hope I have at this point. My emotions are whirling. First I have to meditate before I make the tower collapse.
Beast Boy
Being at the comic book shop isn't giving me the distraction that I was hoping for. Usually when I come in here I get lost in the many different superheroes and their adventures. I'd chat with other comic book fans, tell jokes, and even sign some autographs for my very few fans. I'd forget about what is bothering me at the time and actually be able to focus on something else. I'd be able to enjoy myself. Not this time.
I wander aimlessly through the many aisles of the shop, my eyes glancing lifelessly at the different issues and special edition comics. Nothing grabs my attention. The worst part of all this is I don't really care. Despite finally finding love with Raven, I feel dead on the inside. My chest is being weighed down by what feels like a heavy boulder. I don't enjoy the things I used to enjoy. And I'm so tired. Tired of trying to be happy; tired of crying; tired of living. I just want misery to end at long last. But despite everything that I'm feeling, or not feeling, I will continue to linger on. For Raven.
I grab four or five comics off the shelf, not really paying attention to which superhero or which issue. Then I trudge to the checkout counter. The girl behind the cash register is the only citizen in Jump City that I consider my friend. She's a small girl in her early thirties with shoulder length chestnut hair and deep brown eyes. And she has the cutest dimple in her right cheek. Once I found out that she's also a fan of Syke the Vigilante I'd come in once a week to talk about the superhero and debate on what he's next adventure would be like. For once I am in no mood to talk to her-or anyone for that matter. I hope that this will be a quick purchase.
"Hey BB," she greets me with a warm smile.
"Hey Liv," I mumble, barely taking notice that the black T-shirt she's wearing today says "Geek For Life."
I can feel her eyes on me. Can't say that I'm surprised. I'm not acting like my usual upbeat self. Not to mention I must look like absolute hell. That's how I feel anyway.
"Are you okay?" she asks in concern. "You look really pale."
I look at the ground. "I'm fine," I mumble.
I know that I'm not fooling her one bit, but she doesn't press the issue further. "I wanted to thank the Titans for stopping Control Freak from stealing all my legendary copies of Syke's first issue the other day. I was surprised that you weren't with them, though."
How could you be so stupid! You ruined the whole mission!
I visibly flinch as Cyborg's harsh words ring in my head. I shut my eyes tight to force back the pain. "I wasn't feeling well."
After paying for my purchase I grab the bag and exit the shop without another word. I feel bad for being so cold to pretty much the only friend that I have besides Raven. At the same time, I don't want to talk to anyone. I don't want to burden people with my problems. Keeping my head down I start the short journey back to the tower.
The journey home is uneventful, besides still feeling apprehensive about the possibility of being followed. Once I get back to the tower I move quickly through the kitchen and living room. I really should just turn into an animal so I can make it to my room unnoticed, but I find that I don't have the motivation or desire to use my powers. I'll be in the safety of my room before I know it.
BAM!
I hit something hard and metal. The force sends me backwards, knocking me to the ground. I rub my head in an attempt to get rid of my now forming headache. My eyes widen in horror when I realize that it was Cyborg that I ran into. "S-sorry," I stutter, bracing myself to be yelled at.
It never comes. Instead Cyborg just stares at me for a long minute. It's as if he's trying to figure out what I'm thinking. That's strange. He hasn't cared about me all week, why start now? Then without saying a word he steps around me and leaves the hall into the living room.
After recovering from the impact I get to my feet, grabbing the bag I dropped from off the floor. My encounter with Cyborg relieves and depresses me at the same time. Relieved because he didn't yell at me, depressing because he didn't even acknowledge me at all. Honestly, I'm not sure which one is worse. Either way, the pain is sharp and bright, cutting me deep on the inside. Letting out a depressed sigh I enter my room, shutting the door being me. Now that I'm alone I let the tears fall once more, stinging my face. I hope Raven comes to see me soon. I need her so badly right now.
To be continued...
