A/N: Happy Valentine's Day! And here is my gift to you all for all your support. Thank you guys so much for your feedback. Hope you like this chapter. Please review. Love, Ellivia22

Disclaimer: If I owned Teen Titans Beast Boy would've been treated better in the original show. Yes he can be immature and annoying sometimes, but I really feel that he could've been treated better and given the credit he deserves.

I'll Be

Part XI

Raven

Even though my energy is well spent I find it difficult to fall asleep. My mind can't stop thinking about everything that has happened today. Every time I think about Beast Boy, I clutch onto him a little tighter, doing my best not to hurt him. I wish he would wake up soon. I miss him terribly. Not to mention my emotions won't stop worrying about him until he does.

Suddenly the machine measuring his heart rate changes. Instead of the constant beeping I've been listening to for the past couple of hours I hear a long, drawn out sound.

BEEEEEEEEP!

I bolt out of bed so fast I don't even notice the heavy white blanket falling off me. I don't know how it got there, nor do I care. Instead I stare in horror at the flat line on the computer monitor. Oh no! Please no!

My hands immediately grow blue. I place them above his chest. My heart is racing. His face is no longer green, but the same skin tone as mine. No! "C'mon Beast Boy, don't do this to me! Fight it! For me!"

Before I am able to touch his heart with my healing magic, I feel a hand grab me roughly by the shoulder and push me aside. "Miss, you're going to have to leave immediately," Dr. Haevert says, his face unnaturally pale.

"No!" I scream. A couple of syringes by the wash station explode in black aura. I don't care. "I-I can heal him! I can save him! Please!"

As the hysteria continues to build, more and more things start exploding everywhere in the room. "Get her out of here," the doctor orders in panic. "She'll destroy all the equipment!"

"Come on, dear," a voice says gently. Robynn, the nice nurse who tried to help me earlier grabs my arm firmly, pulling me out of the room.

"Beast Boy!" I cry, tears falling down my cheeks. I can't help it. The most important person in my life is dying right before my very eyes and I can't do a thing to save him. "Beast Boy I love you! Please d-don't leave me!"

I give up struggling once I'm back in the waiting room. I slump in a nearby chair. My hands cover my face to hide the tears. More objects are exploding, in the waiting room this time. I shut my eyes and force myself to calm down before I blow up the entire hospital. Azarath Metrion Zinthos!

"Raven!" Cyborg says. His voice is abnormally high pitched. "What's wrong?! What happened?!"

I don't respond to him. Not because I'm still angry with him, but because I'm so upset I don't think I can get the words out. "Your friend is flat-lining," Robynn says for me. She puts an arm around my shoulders. I'm so distraught I let her. At the same time, her comforting gesture is making it easier to control my emotions.

"What does that mean?" Starfire asks in confusion.

"It means BB's heart has stopped," Cyborg answers. His voice cracks horribly.

I think I might have heard Robin's voice too, but I'm too distraught to care. It takes me a long time to get my emotions completely under control. When the tears finally stop falling from my eyes and the objects stop levitating in the room, I remove my hands from my face. I glance at the young nurse pleadingly. "P-Please don't let him die! I-I need him!"

Robynn tries to appear encouraging, but I can see the anxiety all over her face. Her arm remains across my shoulders in comfort. "I don't want to get your hopes up," she says gently. "But I promise that Dr. Haevert is doing all he can to save your friend."

As if on cue, the doctor enters the waiting room. I stand up shakily, my heart pounding hard in my chest. His next words will either heal me or break me. Dr. Haevert takes a deep breath. "It was a close call, but we managed to get his heart started again. However, he's not out of the woods yet. As a precaution I still can only allow one person to see him."

I step forward. Dr. Haevert gives me a concerned look. "I'm okay now," I tell him reassuringly. He nods, opening the double doors so that I can enter. I do so, not looking back. The other Titans don't matter right now. Jump City doesn't matter right now. All that matters is that I'm with my true love once more.

My rattled emotions settle down completely when I hear the steady beeping on the heart monitor once more. Everything is back to normal. Judging by how green his face is now, I have a good feeling that he will wake up. I just hope that it's sooner rather than later.

I lie back down next to him on the bed. "If you scare me like that again, I swear I'll throw you in another dimension," I threaten tiredly. After such an emotional meltdown, there is nothing keeping me awake this time. I give Beast Boy a soft kiss on the lips, then fall into what I hope is a dreamless sleep.

Beast Boy

I had never been more terrified in my life. I didn't know where I was-whether I was alive or dead. All I could see around me was pure white. I wasn't sure if I was in a room, different world, or a different dimensional plane. Not knowing where I was had to be the most frightening thing I had ever experienced. I wanted to go home.

I shut my eyes so tight it hurt. I want so badly to be back home. Not Titans Tower or Jump City. Not even Detroit where the Doom Patrol Headquarters was located. My real home back in Africa. A place where I was surrounded by all the animals in the wild that my parents let me play with as they studied them. It was the only time and place where I actually felt safe. Anytime I felt scared or alone this was the place my mind would retreat to.

How strange. I thought to myself. I was no longer surrounded by silence. Instead I heard various chirping sounds by many different birds; growling of a tiger; the roar of a gorilla. Sounds I knew very well. And the smell-the smell of the foliage of the jungle-something I hadn't smelled in almost ten years. It can't be real I told myself in disbelief. I'm not really here.

When I opened my eyes I was greeted by the lush green jungle that I knew so well. The many tress and plants. I watched in awe as a red monkey swung from the vines and the many different colored birds flew from tree to tree. I was truly here in Africa. So this is my paradise I thought to myself, feeling immediately at home. I must have truly passed on.

"This is not your home yet," a male voice said from behind me. The voice sounded so familiar, like I heard it in a dream. The voice of someone I hadn't seen in almost a decade. "But it could be."

My body froze in shock. I was too afraid to turn around. I didn't want to be disappointed. Yet I wanted it to be who I thought it was so very badly. Then another voice spoke-a female voice this time. "It's so good to see you, son. My have you grown."

"Mom," I whispered to myself. "Dad."

Finally finding my courage I forced myself to turn around. My eyes remained transfixed on the two people standing in front of me. A tall man with blonde hair, wearing tan safari gear and hat and a woman a little shorter than him, her long brown hair flowing down to the middle of her back. Her outfit was similar to his, but white. They had a certain glow to them. A tear fell down my cheek, followed by another. It was my parents. They were really here. But how? How did they get to my paradise?

"I-I don't understand. Why are you guys here?" I asked. I longed to run over to my parents and fling my arms around them. I longed to hug them tightly and never let go. I couldn't. I was too afraid that they weren't real and this was all just a terrible dream. "Shouldn't you guys be in your own paradise?"

"We came here because we wanted to see you," my mother said gently. "We wanted to help you make the right decision."

It finally dawned on me what she was talking about. I am not dead-not yet. I could be. I could let go and pass on, finally being in the afterlife that I've craved for so long. I could finally be with my parents. Or I could force myself to wake up and go back to my life. Life at Jump City with friends who can't stand me-back to my life with Raven.

I made my decision very quickly. I had been longing for Death since the Titans left me bleeding on the street. I wanted more than anything to stay with my parents. I broke into a run into my parents' arms. Tears fell down my cheeks harder as I felt them hug me tighter. Finally after all these years I felt their hugs. I could smell the jungle on them like I did when I was a child. I was finally safe. I was finally home. "I-I want to stay with you, Mom and Dad," I sobbed. "I-I've wanted to be with you since the accident. I-I'm so sorry that I couldn't save you!"

I felt my mother kiss me on the top of the head. I felt warm all over. "We don't blame you, sweetheart. The accident was not your fault. All that matters is that you made it out alive."

I smiled against my father's chest. A huge burden I've been carrying on my chest had finally lifted. The guilt I had held onto for years dissolved instantly. My parents were okay. They didn't blame me for the accident. My smile faded. There was something bothering me. Neither of them said that they wanted me to join them in paradise. Why? Did they not love me anymore?

I pulled away from my parents and took a step back. I studied both of their faces. They were both serious. It looked like they were almost...disappointed in me. "Y-you don't want me to stay," I asked in a small voice.

My father put his hand on my shoulder. "Son, your mother and I love you more than anything. Of course we want you to stay. Just not right now."

"I don't understand."

"You have so much life ahead of you, Garfield," Mom clarified. "You will be with us here, just not yet. Live your life to the fullest. Continue helping people. Then when the right time comes, we will be together again as a family."

"As long as you don't try taking the easy way out again," Dad added, the disappointment evident in his voice.

I lowered my head in guilt. He was referring to my suicide attempt. "I-I'm sorry that I disappointed you," I whispered. "I was hurting so bad, I just didn't know what to do anymore. I had no one left who believed in me. It took me a long time, but I finally realized how right my teammates were. I'm worthless. They would be better off without me." A couple of tears fell from my eyes. "Everyone would."

"That is not true. " My mother gently wiped the tears away. "You are worth a lot more than you think. Despite all the hardships you have gone through, you've always remained so happy and selfless. You are a very valuable member to your team, even if they don't see it right now. Don't forget about Raven. She'll always be there to remind you how important you are," I lifted my head and looked into my mother's watery brown eyes. "She truly loves you, Garfield. It's a love worth holding onto. She needs you. If you ever feel down, she'll be there for you."

I smiled slightly, thinking about my lavender-haired girlfriend. I loved her with every part of me. I desperately wanted to be with her again. She risked her life to save me from Slade. I couldn't just abandon her. On the other hand, I've missed my parents so much. Besides, despite the fact that the other Titans saved me too, I knew they still hated me. It would be too painful to stay at the Tower. If I chose paradise I knew I'd break Raven's heart. Oh I was so confused. What was I supposed to do?!

"The choice is yours," Mom told me, touching my cheek. "Whatever you decide, we will always love you."

Out of nowhere I felt myself being surrounded by a warm feeling. The feeling of true love. Raven. She was here. Maybe not in this paradise, but wherever my body is, she's with me at this moment. I could feel her. I could smell her lavender scent. It's so calming. After doing some serious thinking, I made a final decision. I loved my parents so much. Finally seeing them at last and knowing that they didn't blame me for the accident gave me a sense of peace that I haven't felt in years. Raven and I could have a bright future. I didn't want to miss out on that. I was ready to go back and live a good life with my true love. Then when my life is finally done, I will spend the afterlife with my family.

I smiled happily at my parents, throwing my arms around them once more. "T-thank you Mom and Dad. I'll see you soon, but not too soon. I love you!"

"We love you too," Dad responded.

I closed my eyes and concentrated. It was time to go back and face the world. This time I was ready.

The sounds of the jungle disappear. I can't smell the trees and plants anymore either. Instead what I hear is the steady beeping of a machine. I can smell a clean and sterile environment. It reminds me strongly of the medical ward back at the Tower. Is that where I am? I don't care where I am as long I am no longer locked in Slade's dungeon.

I don't see much when I open my eyes. The room is completely dark. I glance up to see the beeping monitor beside me, my heartbeat monitored at the top of the screen. I don't recognize the small room that I'm in at all. I'm not in the medical ward like I originally thought. Judging by the many machines and the bed that I'm in, my guess is I'm in the Jump City hospital.

An arm protectively grips onto my side. A smile spreads across my face when I turn my head. Raven is right beside me, her head resting on my shoulder. That explains why I could feel her love so strongly while I was asleep. I breathe in her lavender scent. Seeing her lovely face again reaffirms my feeling that I made the right choice to wake up. As I continue looking at my girlfriend, I can see how thoroughly exhausted she is. Her pale face is full of worry lines and heavy bags are under her eyes. Her short lavender hair is disheveled-something I've never seen on my girlfriend. She must really be worried about me. I long to wake her-to tell her that I'm alive, but I know that she needs the sleep.

Careful not to wake her, I give her a gentle kiss on the lips. "Goodnight my love," I whisper. "I'll see you when you wake up."

Then, feeling thoroughly exhausted from the throbbing pain in my chest and lack of energy, I fall into what I hope is a dreamless sleep.

Raven

I don't wake up until the blinding sunlight makes it impossible to sleep. Even though I slept the rest of the night, I feel as though I didn't get any rest at all. My healing energy is still running low and I still feel utterly stressed out. I know that I will continue to feel that way until Beast Boy wakes up.

Yawning lightly I sit up, stretching. I wonder what I'm going to do to keep myself occupied until Beast Boy wakes up. I didn't bring any of my books with me. The only book I have is Beast Boy's journal.

I glance at my green boyfriend, who is lying peacefully next to me. I realize in great delight the he's doing much better. The color of his skin is almost back to normal and his bandaged chest is rising up and down at a steady pace. If he continues to improve I know that he'll wake up soon-hopefully today.

"Good morning, Beast Boy,' I whisper, kissing his lips gently.

To my utmost surprised I feel him kiss me back, slow at first, then with more passion. His kiss makes me feel good all over. All the stress I've been feeling all night ebbs away almost instantly. Instead I feel completely loved.

"Good morning, Rae," Beast Boy says sleepily. His green eyes are halfway open. "I hope you slept well."

"Nevermind about me," I say impatiently. "How are you feeling?!"

"Sore. And tired. But I'm okay."

I look deeply into his green eyes to make sure that he is truly awake. "Are you sure that you're okay?" I ask. "Your heart stopped beating last night. It nearly scared me to death."

"I'm fine. I promise." A smirk grows on his face. "I thought you didn't do fear."

I glare at him. "Death is not something to joke about!"

His smile disappears instantly. "I know. I'm sorry. Don't worry about me, Raven. I promise that I'll never leave your side again."

"Good."

I press my lips against his for another intense kiss. He responds with just as much enthusiasm. He opens his mouth to deepen the kiss. Shivers run up and down my spine as I feel his uninjured bare hand through my short lavender hair. I never want this moment to end.

"I love you," Beast Boy whispers once we are forced to pull away.

I smile. "I love you, too." Not wanting to be separated any longer, I kiss him again.

"Well, I certainly wasn't expecting to see this," a very amused male voice says from behind us.

My whole body freezes. I pull away from Beast Boy immediately. Standing by the doorway is a very amused Dr. Haevert and a smirking Nurse Robynn. Faster than the speed of light I get off the bed. My cheeks are flushed and I hear a window shatter.

How humiliating! Embarrassment says in my mind, hiding her face with her dark yellow cloak.

Dr. Haevert enters the room, the smirk still on his face. "How are you feeling?" he asks Beast Boy. "Besides an elevated heart rate?"

Beast Boy's face changes from green to tomato red. "I-I'm fine," he squeaks.

Silently Dr. Haevert checks all of Beast Boy's vitals. Once I recover from the shock and embarrassment I sit on the chair next to the hospital bed.

"Your vitals look good," Dr. Haevert says after listening to Beast Boy's breathing through the stethoscope. "I'm going to remove the bandages from you burns now."

I watch as the doctor gently removes the white bandages that are on Beast Boy's chest. I feel sick to my stomach seeing the injuries Beast Boy sustained from Slade. The burns don't look as vicious as they did before, thanks to my healing and whatever treatments the doctor did, but they are still a vibrant red color. I vividly see the shape of a chain imprinted in a diagonal direction on his chest. Because of the severity of the burns, I know that no amount of healing will erase the damage. He'll have those scars forever.

"These are looking much better," Dr. Haevert says, examining the injuries on Beast Boy's back. "It'll take some time to heal, but you should be able to go home in a week or two."

"Don't worry, Doc," Beast Boy says cheerfully, sounding like the old Beast Boy I used to know. "I'm a fast healer. I'll be out of your hair in no time."

"Good. Now that you're awake I'll have Robynn get your friends. They've been worried sick about you."

"NO!" Beast Boy sits up suddenly. His green face instantly turns into a very light green. I can feel his agony from his injuries. "Please don't!"

"Lie down, Garfield," I tell my boyfriend sharply.

He doesn't listen to me. He stares at the doctor in utter terror. I can feel his distress level rising rapidly. "I-if you bring them in here they'll just yell at me for all the trouble I've caused. I-I can't take it!"

With a firm hand I push Beast Boy hard on the shoulder until he's lying back down again. I hold on firm so he doesn't try to sit up again. His body is trembling in fear, his green eyes are as wide as dinner plates. Dr. Haevert and Robynn look at each other in confusion. Then they look at me. "It's a long story," I tell them, sighing. "All you need to know is that it would be best if the others don't visit him yet."

"Very well," Dr. Haevert says. He puts a reassuring hand on Beast Boy's other shoulder. "Don't worry. You don't have to see anyone that you don't want to."

"Thank you," Beast Boy says quietly. His face is still really pale, but he's slowly starting to calm down again.

"I'll come by tonight to see how you're doing. In the meantime get your rest."

Dr. Haevert and Robynn exit the room, leaving us alone again. Beast Boy's eyes are shut and distress is all over his face. "Are you all right?" I ask in concern.

"I can't face them, Raven," Beast Boy whispers. "I just can't. Not after...not after everything they've done to me. I-I'm too scared."

I stroke his emerald hair. "I know they really hurt you, Beast Boy. But I have seen them since we rescued you. They are all full of remorse for what they've done. I think they've finally realized how wrong they have been about you. Maybe you should give them a chance to apologize."

"You don't understand, Raven. There is a major event, well lots of major events that happened between me and the others that you don't know about. They...they broke me. That's why I attempted suicide the night you found me."

"Tell me." I urge, trying to give him an encouraging smile, even though his eyes are still shut tight. "I want to know everything."

Beast Boy is silent for a long time. Then finally he opens his eyes and looks at me seriously. Torment is evident all over his face. He's reliving all the painful memories of the past week. I feel his sadness and longing for the pain to go away. I continue to stroke his hair in hopes of giving him some comfort. "All right," he says reluctantly.

I listen closely, bracing myself to learn all the horrible events that had happened to Beast Boy before I realized what was going on. I want to know everything, so that I can make the situation better.


It's nearly noon when I finally leave Beast Boy's hospital room. Once I learned everything that the others did to Beast Boy I had to spend at least an hour comforting my green boyfriend. Many tears were shed and I had to hold him close to ease his pain.

Then I spent another two hours meditating while Robynn came in routinely to check Beast Boy's vitals before leaving for the day. I had to meditate. After everything I learned, my anger and hatred towards the others was stronger than ever. As much as I want to release my anger on the others, I didn't want to let Rage loose. She'll destroy the hospital and put innocent civilians' lives in danger. Once I finally calmed her down enough to put her back in her chains, I figured it was finally time to face the others. I had to make sure they finally see how much damage they've caused. They must see how much they hurt the teammate they suddenly care so much about.

I enter the waiting room. Robin is sitting in a corner by the door, his head bent. Starfire is sitting next to Cyborg, who is snoring loudly, sprawled across three chairs. He jerks awake when the large doors close behind me. He jumps to his feet. "Raven!" he says urgently. "How is he?!"

"Beast Boy is awake," I manage in my usual monotone.

"Oh Thank God," Cyborg says.

"That is wonderful news!" Starfire gushes happily. Robin hurries over to us, immense relief all over his masked face. "Now I can finally tell Beast Boy how sorry I am!"

I grab her by the arm before she can pass me. "He doesn't want to see any of you."

"We understand that we hurt him," Cyborg says. "We want to apologize to him and make everything right."

I stare at my friends. Guilt is evident on all their faces. Not enough guilt-not after all the horrible thing I just learned. Beast Boy had a hard time telling me everything because the memories hurt him so much. They need to truly realize what their actions have done to the person I love."Understand?!" My eyes glow white, my hood coming up. I rise up high in the air. "You understand nothing! AZARATH METRION ZINTHOS!"

The floor below the Titans opens up to a swirling black portal. I watch as my three former friends fall through the portal. They don't know it yet, but I'm sending them to the past in Beast Boy's point of view. Finally they will truly understand how much damage their hate has caused.

To be continued...