Steven sat out on the beach with his ukulele. Since Connie had been grounded, he hadn't done much aside from wait until they could hang out again. And join the Gems on the occasional mission, and even those were few and far between. He'd just been bored without his dear friend to spend time with. He strummed a couple of chords on his ukulele before his phone rang. He dug it out of his pocket and answered it. "Hello?"
"Hey, Schtu-Ball." It was his dad, Greg. "You doing okay?"
"Yeah. Just still bummed about not being able to see Connie again."
"It's okay, buddy. I'm sure you two'll see each other again soon. You wanna come help me at the car wash?"
"Sure. I'll be right over." Steven hung up and took off to It's A Wash. He didn't really feel like it, but he figured he could use something to do. On the way there, he was surprised to se a familiar face running towards him.
"Steven!"
"Connie?!"
"Steven!" Connie ran up to him and gave him a big hug.
"Connie! I thought you were grounded!"
"I was. My week is up now, which means we get to hang out again!"
"Yeah!" Steven hugged back harder, then let go when he realized he was crushing her. "Sorry."
"So, what do you wanna do?"
"I was on my way to my dad's car wash to help wash cars. You wanna come with?"
"Sure."
So the two friends walked the rest of the way to the car wash.
Greg was reading a magazine as he saw a red convertible pull up to It's A Wash.
"Hey! You run the car wash?" The teenager driving it asked.
"Sure do!" Greg replied. "I take it you want your car washed?"
"Duh! And you better wax it too. I don't want a scratch on this baby."
"Hey, Dad!" Just then, Greg saw Steven and Connie running over to him.
"Hey, kids! Nice to see ya! You're not grounded anymore, Connie?"
"Nope! Is there anything you need help with?"
"Sure! How 'bout you kids each grab a sponge and help me scrub this young man's convertible?"
"Hey, old man!" the young man in the convertible said. "I don't want a couple of kids putting their grimy little hands on my new ride."
"What?" Connie balked.
"Excuse me, sir," Steven started. "But I'll have you know that I just turned thirteen not too long ago."
"You're still a kid. Whatever. I'll just go to the car wash across town. They give you a free air freshener with each wash. And they don't have kids working there." And he drove off.
"Maybe I should start giving out free air fresheners too," Greg mused out loud.
"I think I saw that guy at the rave I went to with Lars and the Cool Kids," Steven said. "He mostly just leaned against the wall the whole time."
"With the way he was acting, he kinda reminded me of Marty," Greg said.
"Who's Marty?" Connie asked.
"Oh, he was an old manager of mine back when I was just starting out on my music career," Greg answered. "He was there when I first met Steven's mom, Rose."
"So how did you two meet exactly?" Connie pressed on.
"Oh boy, looks like it's story time. How 'bout you guys come in my van and I'll tell you all about it." The man opened up the back doors of the vehicle in question.
"Story time!" Steven and Connie both exclaimed with joy as they ran in.
Greg climbed in after them and sat down on the floor while the two kids sat on the mattress that served as his bed. "Everyone comfy?"
The two children nodded while going "Mm-hm!"
"Okay." Greg grabbed his guitar and strummed a chord. "Get ready to hear the Ballad of Rose and Greg."
It was pouring in Beach City, and the van got a flat tire on the way to Empire City. Greg's manager, Marty, had forced him out to put on an impromptu concert to drum up some more money. He was crazy, Greg thought. Nobody in their right mind would be out and about in this kind of weather. He figured he might as well play something anyway. He was standing out in the rain, playing "Comet", one of his favorite songs that he wrote, though it just wasn't the same without a stage and lights. Once he finished, he saw a very tall, very pink woman in a white dress clapping for him. Her hair was short and light and poofy, and her eyes were a vibrant magenta color which accentuated her oddly diamond-shaped pupils. She looked like an alien goddess.
"That was wonderful!" she said. Her voice even sounded like that of a goddess.
"Thank you! I'm Mr. Universe! I'm an up-and-coming music sensation! I've already got a couple of albums put together. Ever heard of 'Space Train to the Cosmos'?" He began singing. "I got a one-way ticket an' I'm ready to ri~ide."
"One-way ticket?"
"Yep. I'm never coming back to Earth!"
"You can't just leave your planet behind!" the pink woman exclaimed. "This is your home!"
Greg suddenly remembered something. "Oh! You wouldn't happen to have any money, would you?"
The pink woman tilted her head in curiosity. "Why would I?"
"Well, I kinda need some money to get my ride checked out. It got a flat tire on the way to Empire City for my big gig."
"I have a friend who can fix it for you!"
"Really?"
"Of course! I can take you to her if you like."
"Uh, well, thanks, but-" Suddenly, Greg was hoisted off his feet as the pink woman scooped him up in her arms. Wow, she was strong.
"You shouldn't be standing out in the rain anyway. Your fragile human body could get sick." She ran off to the distant beach, the wind whipping through Greg's hair and stinging his face along with the cold rain. They stopped at a massive, woman-shaped structure carved into the side of a cliff. "I'll see if she's here. I'm sorry you'll have to stay outside, but humans aren't allowed in the Crystal Temple." She knocked on the door. "Pearl? Are you home?" Nobody answered. "I guess she's out on a mission."
The red stone and the blue stone on the door both started glowing, and the door opened to reveal a much shorter woman with bright red skin, like she had a very bad sunburn. She wore a headband, a tank top, shorts, and boots. Standing next to her was a blue woman about her height who had long, light hair that covered her eyes and a darker blue, fancy-looking dress. "Is there something you need, Rose?" the red woman greeted.
"Oh, hello, Ruby, Sapphire. This human needs his mode of transport fixed, so I thought I would ask Pearl to-"
"So why did you bring him here? Doesn't everyone in Beach City know that humans aren't allowed here?"
"Ruby, he needs help."
"So why doesn't he just go to the repair shop in the town?"
"Well, I would..." Greg replied hesitantly, rubbing the back of his neck. "but I'm kinda short on cash right now. That's why I was out busking in the rain."
"Busking?" Ruby repeated, as if she didn't know what that word meant.
"You know, playing music for money?"
"So, you're a music player, huh?" The red woman walked closer to him, looking him up and down. "You don't really seem the type. Where's your instrument?"
"I guess I must've dropped it when Rose carried me to your... temple."
The blue woman, Sapphire, then took Ruby's hand. "Ruby, you know how much Rose likes musicians."
Ruby nodded in agreement. "He and Pearl are definitely gonna be competing for her."
"So... how long is this 'Pearl' gonna be out for?"
"Missions vary in duration of time," Sapphire said. "She could be out for a few minutes or a few hours."
"Ah, jeez, I really gotta get to Empire City in a few hours for my gig."
Suddenly, the large, cyan crystal platform in front of the door glowed and made a "ping" sound as a very skinny, very pale woman appeared on it. She had short, peachy pink hair and what looked like a large, white stone stuck in her forehead.
"I'm back!" She looked at Greg, who shifted awkwardly on his feet. "Um, why is there a human here?"
"Oh, Pearl!" Rose piped up. "This is Mr. Universe. He needs your help to fix his vehicle so he can go to Empire City for his gig." She walked up to whisper in Pearl's ear. "He's a musician."
"Oh! A musician?" Pearl smirked at him. "Well, why don't you play something then, Mr. Universe?"
"Maybe later, but can you please fix my van first? I don't have a lot of money on me right now, but I can-"
"Don't worry about it. I'll take care of it free of charge. None of us have a need for money anyway."
"Oh. Okay." Greg wondered how these strangers were able to live comfortably if they were apparently flat broke. Then he wondered if they were part of some kind of cult. They did kind of have that culty vibe, what with the living in a temple and wearing that odd jewelry in random places on their bodies. "Say, you guys aren't part of a cult, are you?"
"No. Why would we be?"
"Just asking."
"Right. So, would you mind showing me where your vehicle is?"
"Sure. I think..." Greg looked over his shoulder. "You know, I don't really know where we are. I think we parked in front of that donut shop with the big, donut-shaped sign."
"Oh. You mean the Big Donut?" Rose asked. "Amethyst eats there all the time! I'll take you there." She picked up both Pearl and Greg and ran off away from the Temple.
They soon arrived at the Big Donut where Greg's van was indeed parked in the parking lot. Rose put them down on the asphalt and the young man walked up to the vehicle to knock on its galaxy-painted exterior, right on the R in UNIVERSE.
"Hey, Marty! I got someone to fix the van's flat tire!"
The back doors opened to reveal the old curmudgeon himself, and an aloof-looking young woman who looked about Greg's age and had long, honey blonde hair with a poof at the top of her head.
"Hey, Star Child! Meet Vidalia. She's a hot biker chick I met while trying to sell some merchandise around this dump of a town."
"Sup?"
Greg apprehensively held out a hand to shake. "Nice to meet you."
Vidalia didn't take it and just said, "So you guys live in a van, huh? Really livin' the high life." And she blew a bubble of gum, which popped before going back in her mouth.
"So, this is Pearl. She's gonna be replacing the flat for us."
"Hello."
"Hey! What's going on over here?" A short, (though not as short as Sapphire and Ruby) purple woman with her long, off-white hair in a ponytail and wearing a sea green fanny pack ran up to them. "Who's all these humans?"
"It's 'Who are all of these humans', Amethyst, and Rose and I are helping them replace a flat tire on their van."
"Cool. Can I watch?"
"I suppose." Pearl then noticed the purple woman, Amethyst apparently, eating a donut. "Where did you get that, Amethyst?"
"That's for me to know, and you to not worry about."
Pearl's eyes narrowed in annoyance. "You've been eating out of the Big Donut's garbage again, haven't you?"
"Yup."
"Amethyst, we've talked about that!"
"What? The birds and the squirrels eat out of the garbage all the time!" Amethyst turned away as she crossed her arms. "I don't see you squawking at them about it."
Pearl then got right up in her face. "I do not squawk! This is squawking: Squawk! Squawk!"
Rose pushed the two away from each other. "Now, you two, what have I told you about fighting?"
They both looked down at the asphalt in guilt. "Sorry, Rose."
Marty spoke up. "Hey, are you gonna fix the flat or what?"
"Oh, of course!" Rose crouched down to look at Amethyst at eye-level. "Amethyst, could you go and see if you have any tires in your room? Preferably one that's in good condition?"
"Oh yeah! I'll go grab it!" And she ran off, presumably back to the Temple.
Greg decided to take the time they had to wait to try to know his new acquaintances a little better. "So, what do you guys do for a living?"
"Well, we protect Earth and humanity from our own kind," Rose answered. "It's such a shame they don't want to preserve this planet. You humans are all so... remarkable, with how you can choose what you do with your lives here."
The young man smiled. "Yeah. I guess that is pretty remarkable."
His manager then cleared his throat. "So, should we pay you up front right now, or can we pay you when you're done?"
"Pay?" Pearl asked. "Oh, no. You don't have to pay anything. I've already told Mr. Universe that I would fix your flat tire free of charge."
The two men looked at each other. "Excuse us for a sec," Marty said as he dragged Greg behind the van.
"What's up, Marty?"
"I've got a good feeling about those chicks, Star Child. And it's a little too good."
"What do you mean?"
"They're offerin' to fix our van for free. Obviously, they're trying to get something out of it."
"Like what?"
"Like you."
"What?!"
"Is something the matter?" Rose asked.
"No, we're fine!" Greg turned back to Marty. "What do you mean, 'like me'?"
"I mean, I'm assuming they heard you playing, right?"
"Rose did, and she really liked it. What's your point?" Greg asked, even though he could guess where Marty was going with this.
"My point is once they're done with fixing up our ride, Rose might mention needing a guitarist for their band, and if you accept her offer to join them, then I'll be left in the dust!" Marty gestured to himself for emphasis.
"But couldn't you also consider that they're fixing the flat tire for free because they're good people?"
Marty put a hand on Greg's shoulder. "Kid, everyone's got an ulterior motive. Trust me, we are getting to Empire City, and we will not let those salt water chumps change our minds."
"Really, Marty? They're offering to help us, and you're gonna call them chumps?"
Suddenly, there was the sound of something hitting the side of the van hard before falling over on the wet asphalt. Greg and Marty went to go see what happened, and saw a monster-truck-sized tire lying on the ground. Amethyst popped up from the tire's hole. "I got the tire!"
"Thank you, Amethyst," Pearl said. "but that tire won't be able to fit on the van's wheel. It's too big."
Amethyst looked at it. "Oh. Shoot. I'll be right back." And she stood the tire up, got back inside it, and rolled off like a hamster in a ball. Except if the ball was a wheel, and the hamster was the size of a medium-sized dog, and it was going about 30 miles per hour.
"So, Rose, what do you like to do for fun?" Greg asked her.
"Oh, well, I like to take long walks on the beach, and I also like to sing, dance, and listen to music."
"I like those things too! Well, except for that first thing."
Rose's smile deflated. "Oh. I'm sorry."
"It's okay. I just haven't been to the beach enough to really appreciate it. I prefer walking among the stars anyway."
Rose chuckled in response.
"Well, I also like those things!" Pearl piped up. "All four of them as a matter of fact."
"That's nice." He turned back to Rose. "So, do you like the Big Donut too, or is it just Amethyst?"
"I actually haven't tried it."
"Well, maybe I could get us both something from there. My treat."
"That sounds lovely."
Marty suddenly grabbed him by the shoulder. "Star Child, what are you doing?"
"I'm just buying myself and Rose some donuts. Is that a problem?"
"You can't be getting all buddy-buddy with these ladies. You belong with me. You signed a contract, remember?"
"Yeah, I remember. Don't worry. I won't forget about the gig."
Then Amethyst came running back carrying a bicycle tire. "Is this one good?"
"Amethyst, that's a bicycle tire!" Pearl sighed. "That's completely insufficient for a van."
The purple woman tossed the tire over her shoulder. "Right, right, you need a van tire. Don't worry, I'll get it right this time." And she ran off again to grab another tire.
"So... can I go now?" Vidalia asked, apparently having been standing there silent the whole time.
Marty waved her off dismissively. "Sure. Get outta here." And she walked off.
Greg took out his wallet. "What do you say, Rose? Wanna go in there and grab some donuts?"
"Of course! Let's go!" Rose took his hand and walked towards the donut shop. Her hands were so soft, like he was holding hands with an angel. When they went inside, they were greeted by a young man with a flat top afro behind the counter.
"Welcome to the Big Donut, home of the best donuts in Beach City! How can I help you today?"
"I'd like to buy a half-dozen box of assorted donuts please," Greg said.
The employee started putting some donuts in a half-dozen box. "And does the lady want anything?"
"A half-dozen box of assorted donuts please," Rose told him.
The employee looked perplexed. "One for each of you?! You guys must be hungry!"
Greg quickly corrected him. "Oh, no, no! We just want one."
"Why only one?" Rose asked. "I'm sure Amethyst would appreciate getting a box."
"I'm sure she'll be fine. Let's just get the one box, I'm kinda low on money anyway."
"Alright."
Greg took out a dollar bill to pay for the donuts.
"Thank you for coming to the Big Donut, home of the best donuts in Beach City! Have a wonderful day."
"Thanks. You too." And they walked out with their treat.
"Are those donuts?" Pearl asked when she saw them.
"Yeah. I just thought I'd buy us a treat while we wait for Amethyst to get back. You want one?"
"No thank you," Pearl said as she crinkled her nose slightly. "I don't eat junk food."
"Seriously? Suit yourself." He took out a donut and took a bite. "Oh, wow! That guy wasn't kidding when he said these are the best donuts in Beach City."
Rose took out a donut herself and looked at it before popping the whole thing in her mouth, and her eyes went wide with amazement. Greg couldn't help but chuckle at her reaction. "This... this taste is wonderful!"
"I knew you'd like it!"
Then Amethyst came back again, this time carrying a tire over her head, this one being the right size this time. "Hey, guys! I got the tire you guys need!"
Pearl walked over and took it from her. "Thank you, Amethyst. Honestly, I would have expected you to get it right the first time."
"Nah. I was just messin' with you." She laughed as Pearl pinched the bridge of her nose. The purple woman then noticed the box Greg was holding and ran right up to him to take it. "Ooh! Are those donuts? Gimme!"
"Amethyst!" Rose reprimanded. "What do we say when we want something?"
"Please gimme?"
"That's better." And she handed Amethyst a donut, which she devoured in seconds before taking the box and eating the rest of them, and then eating the box itself. "Now let's get to work on changing the tire, shall we?"
"Do you guys have a jack on you?" Greg asked.
"A jack? Oh, no, we don't need one of those."
"What do you mean?"
Rose didn't answer, and instead walked right up to the van and lifted it half off the ground. Lord almighty, she was strong. All Greg could muster was a simple "Holy smokes."
"And if you think that's impressive, you should see this." Pearl then did some kind of weird dance as the stone on her forehead started glowing. "Haaaah! Tooooh!" and she put her hand to her forehead stone and pulled out a socket wrench. "Impressed?"
"Uh, yeah."
"This will only take a minute." And she proceeded to get to work loosening the nuts on the van's flat tire.
Greg walked up to Rose and cleared his throat. "So, you're pretty strong, huh?"
"Yes, I am, and I'm pretty sure you're strong too. Just not as strong as me in the physical sense. Not to offend you or anything!"
"It's fine. No offense taken. So, how long have you known your roommates for?"
"Roommates? You mean the rest of the Gems?" Rose pondered that question. "I'd say about a few thousand years."
"A few thousand... You're joking, right?"
Rose frowned at him. "No. Why would I be?"
"Uh, sorry."
"Um, excuse me, I need to concentrate on changing your tire for you," Pearl spoke. "The sooner I get that done, the sooner you can get to Empire City."
"That's right," Marty said. "so chop chop! I'm not gettin' any younger here!"
"Relax, won't you? Your van will be ready to go soon enough. I just need to put the tire on."
"Oh, yeah! I forgot my guitar! I'll go grab it."
"Don't worry," Rose said as she grabbed Greg by the shoulder while she was still holding up the van with one arm. "I'll get for you once your van is fixed."
"Alright, it's done," Pearl announced. "You humans can go on your merry way." Rose gently put the van back down before running off and coming back with Greg's guitar.
"Here's your instrument back." And she handed it to him.
"Thanks, guys," Greg said. "I owe you something."
"No you don't," Pearl said. "I told you we have no need for money."
"Not that. I'm giving you something more valuable than money."
Greg went in the back of the van and brought out a couple of Mr. Universe t-shirts and an album of some of his music. Pearl took it and read the cover: "'Space Train to the Cosmos'?"
"Yeah! That album's got some of my best songs. I think you guys'll really like it."
"What're you doing, Star Child?!" Marty exclaimed. "You can't just give out merchandise for free! What about my 75 percent?"
"Come on, Marty. I'm just giving them a token of thanks for helping us out."
"Then just thank them and leave it at that. I can't have you going against our 75 percent agreement. 75 percent of nothing is nothing. Are you worth nothing?"
"No, but-"
"Come on, let's go!"
After an hour had passed and they were already halfway to Empire City, Greg still couldn't get his mind off of Rose.
"You're being awfully quiet, Star Child. What's eating you?"
"Oh. I was just... thinking about Rose."
"Why do you care about that chick anyway? There'll be plenty of other women in Empire City."
"They won't be like Rose."
"Yeah, but I'll bet they'll be way hotter. Certainly less tall, but if tall is what you're into, I'm sure we can find something."
"I don't care about her appearance, Marty. There's just... something about her. I can't explain it."
"Well, tough luck, Star Child. We're not going back to that podunk beach town. You're gonna play at Empire City, and you're gonna like it. And more importantly, you're gonna make me rich."
Greg started getting upset. "Why do you always get to decide what's important?"
"Because I'm your manager, and you're just some spaced-out loser with no sense of direction." They stopped at a rest stop. "Face it, kid. You signed the contract, so you're stuck with me. Watch the van while I get something to drink."
Greg opened the glove compartment and took out a piece of paper, then stepped out of the van. "You mean this contract?" And then he ripped it in half.
"Greg, what the hell have you done?!"
"I just voided the contract, so I'm not working under you anymore." And with that, Greg sat in the driver's seat and locked the doors of the van so Marty couldn't get in.
Marty banged on the window. "Greg! Open up right now! You're making a huge mistake!"
"Sorry, Marty." Greg buckled up and turned the ignition. "I've got somewhere to be." And he drove off, leaving Marty to shout, "You know you'll never be anyone without me!" He didn't pay him any mind, and just kept driving until he reached the giant woman-shaped temple in Beach City.
He stepped out and took his guitar out of the back to play for the alien goddess who helped him out. He then walked up to the door of the temple and knocked. "Rose? Are you here?"
The door opened, revealing Rose on the other side. She was wearing the shirt he gave her. "Mr. Universe, what are you doing here? Aren't you supposed to be in Empire City doing your gig?"
"I decided to forget about the gig and come back to see you. Also, you can just call me Greg. That's my real name."
Rose sighed. "Greg, look, you seem really sweet, and I really would love to get to know you better, but I don't want you to miss out on what you really want."
"That's the thing, Rose. You're what I really want!"
The tall, pink beauty's eyes widened as she blushed a richer shade of pink. "Really?"
"Yeah. And I even made up a song about you on the way here."
"Do you believe in destiny?
"Just close your eyes and leave the rest to me.
"Do you believe in fantasy?
"I have to when it appears in front of me.
"Oh, what are you doing here
"On this lonesome star?
"What are you doing here?
"Close enough to touch, but still so far.
"What are you doing here?
"What are you doing here,
"And what are you doing to me?"
Steven and Connie were applauding and cheering for Greg when he wrapped up his song.
"Thank you, thank you! I may have lost most of my hair, but I still got the magic."
"You two were pretty in love, weren't you?" Steven asked while smiling like a goofball.
"C'mere, you!" Greg grabbed him and started giving him a noogie.
"So, do you have any other stories about you and Steven's mom?" Connie asked.
"Maybe some other time, but it looks like we've got some more customers coming." Steven's father crawled out of the van and stood to his feet. "Time to get to work!"
"Hey, Dad?"
"Yeah, Steven?"
"I kinda like the nickname, Star Child. I might start using it as my title as a protector of humanity."
Greg smiled at him. "I gotta admit, it does sound pretty fitting for you."
Steven smiled back and whispered to himself, "Steven the Star Child," as he looked at his gem under his shirt.
