It took quite some time for Anna to realize what had happened. The caravan had moved inward towards the East at that time, and she had accounted her sudden weight gain for the intense hunger she felt. It was wintertime, the days were colder and food was harder to come by. Hunger was to be expected. But then one day an odd sensation came over he and she intuitively knew that she was pregnant. She was pregnant with Edward's child. She was pregnant with Rose.
Her first emotion was panic. She barely knew Edward, yet she was about to bear his child. A child meant another mouth to feed. How would her family react? She had never seen it firsthand, but what if they decided that Anna and her unborn bastard child had outstayed their usefulness to their community? And what would happen in five months' time when Edward returned? Would he leave her forever, or would he stay and be a father to her child? Oh please, let it be a boy, so that he may be of some good to his pirate captain father, she prayed.
Anna's initial emotions about Rose were less than positive. She stayed locked inside her wagon and cried for fear of what was to come. But then, a sudden emotion overwhelmed Anna the day she first felt her unborn child move inside her. An instinctive emotion Anna was unfamiliar with. A sudden urge to protect another person. Her child would carry her blood in its veins. It might have her eyes, her nose, her ears. What made her fall in love with the aspect of a baby was the thought of who he might be. He might be rich, he might not survive, he might captain his own ship one day, he might follow in her footsteps. There was so much uncertainty in her world, yet the one certainty Anna held onto was the one certainty she knew: that whoever was inside her would be her child. No one else could lay claim to him except herself and Edward.
Anna had a choice, to face her fears and take responsibility for her unexpected pregnancy or starve. She spoke with the higher counsel. They were, of course, concerned about adding another living soul to their already large clan, but could not afford to lose Anna, who still remained their largest form of income. Anna was safe with the gypsies. Anna's final stipulation was that before the end of the summer, the caravan would head back to the port where she and Edward had first met. They agreed. Anna would not only be in time to tell Edward her incredible news, but she would be early.
The time was right and the weather was warmer. Every day Anna waited for Edward to return. She tried not to get herself into a panicked state of mind over his return, or potential lack thereof, but the thought of his reaction to their child plagued her with every day the baby grew stronger inside her.
While Anna had been early to their meeting place, Edward was late. He was late by a week. And Anna tore herself up every day he failed to show himself. Finally one day, a man from her clan ran from the docks. Anna heard his cries from inside her wagon. "Desiree! Tell Anna the Misty Lady has returned!" Before Desiree could give word to Anna, she was already standing outside her wagon ready to greet him.
She watched, heart racing, as he climbed up the path to their camp. He looked up and instantly locked eyes with her. She beamed. He looked weary, but happy to see her. Then...disaster. He looked down and noticed her protruding belly. His face fell and he stopped walking. As soon as Anna noticed this less than positive reaction, her heart dropped into the pit of her stomach. She instead started to walk briskly toward him, hand on her stomach as she approached.
"Edward," she began warmly.
He started first. "Anna, you...Anna..." It was as though he could not comprehend what he was seeing. It was comparable to the feeling when one is walking in the dark down familiar terrain when an unfamiliarity occurs, and your entire world is shaken. Suddenly, you have no idea where you are, because everything has been thrown into tumultuous nonsense. This is only what I can assume Edward must have felt when he saw Anna heavily pregnant. All he knew was that he had gone away, and when he returned, what he expected to find was gone and would never return to the way it was.
"Edward," Anna cooed gently. "Aren't you happy to see me?" She was desperate. She had to fight to urge to blurt out every insecurity she felt from his reaction to her.
"Anna..." He couldn't stop saying her name, as though by repeating it, time could reverse. "You..."
"Yes, I'm pregnant, Edward." She said it straight out. Her heart was about to burst it pounded so hard.
He couldn't look at her. He was silent for an unbearably lengthy amount of time. Anna was about to speak in his place, when he suddenly muttered, nearly inaudibly, "Whose?"
This single utterance shook Anna to her core. This was how little he knew her. He did not know that she was not the kind to fly from man to man. The man who had fathered her child didn't even trust her.
She flared with anger. "Whose? Edward, my love, it can only be yours!"
Now, from what I have heard, I know Edward did not respond well to this news, but the stories were vague on how exactly he reacted. Now knowing him, I can honestly say I know precisely what he experienced. He felt as though he had just received a blow to the chest. He stumbled backwards and put his hands to his forehead, mouth agape.
Anna rushed to him, wrapping her arms around him. "No, no my love. Please do not act this way! Please! I had no way to find you and tell you! It will be alright! I will raise the child! I promise you, we will be alright!"
For the first time, Anna heard Edward raise his voice to her. And it scared her to death. "YES you will be alright! You and the child! But what of me? I now have a responsibility to someone who I won't even KNOW!" He stumbled away, out of breath and leaning against the tree where they had first met.
"Won't know?" Anna cried. "WON'T KNOW? Who is to say you won't know him?"
"Anna, come now! You don't expect me to stay and play family with you! I belong on the sea. I cannot remain with your kind!"
"So our child is not worthy to be with his father? Is that what you are saying?"
"I...I don't know! I don't KNOW, Anna!"
Anna was hysterical. She clutched her stomach ruefully. Edward stayed still, watching her uncertainly.
She finally brought herself to words. "Would...would you have taken away a single moment we had at the cost of this baby?"
His silence answered her question before he said it; "Yes. Probably."
She felt so betrayed. How could he say such a thing? How could he question the passion they shared?
"I have something to tell you, Anna."
No. No! She knew what was about to come next would deliver the final death blow to their love.
"I'm married. I already have a son. He's seven years old." Fresh tears ran down Anna's cheeks as she sank to her knees. Edward knelt in the grass in front of her. "When we met, it had been over a year since I had seen them, and I hadn't left my wife on good terms."
"So I was your whore?" Anna spat.
"Lord no!" he knelt next to her and tried dried to dry her tears. He pulled her face inward to him, and cradled her head against his shoulder. There they sat, against that tree, for the rest of the afternoon.
Wordlessly, they watched the sun set, but there was no green flash that night. They both silently deflated at this, as though nature itself had sent word that this relationship was never meant to last.
As night fell, Edward said the last words he would ever say to Anna; "I love you, Anna. And I'm sure your child will be a fine one."
Our child, Anna thought, but there was nothing she could say. She fell asleep in his arms like there, and when she awoke the next morning, a single, white rose sat in his place, with the mother of pearl pendant Anna had originally stolen from him, wrapped around the stem.
A few months later, Anna gave birth to her baby. The birth was not particularly noteworthy, as the child came into the world without much pomp or drama.
Anna asked her sister what the sex was. She began to cry when she heard it was a girl. Worthless. A boy could have gone with him. Now I am saddled with this… a constant reminder of him.
It took Anna two weeks to name the baby. This was mostly because Desiree and the other women took care of her. They were afraid Anna would hurt the child, as she fell into a dark state of depression. But one day, Anna entered the tent where her daughter was being cared for, peered into her child's makeshift crib, and smiled.
"I'll name her Rose," she said, holding dead, dried white petals in her palm. "I'll name her after her father's first, last, and only gift to her.
