A/N: Well, like I said, I already had three chapters of this baby finished, so here's the second one. The one where crap gets real.
Props to those who understood all the references in Chapter 1, from Monty Python to Harry Potter. MAJOR props to those who know where the name Lizards & Wizards came from; only true fans will understand that one. Anyway, let's-a go!
Chapter 2: Doorways
WHUMP
Ed was slow to rouse from his slumber, drowsily mumbling and smacking his lips, curling inward in a blind search for comfort until the cold finally overwhelmed him. He lazily opened his eyes, staring across the concrete surface he was lying on following his graceless tumble out of bed. After a few seconds spent letting the cobwebs clear from the cogs of his brain, Ed put on a cheery smile. "Good morning, floor."
He swung himself up into a sitting position, yawning and stretching wide enough to give the whole day a big hug. Then he leaped onto his feet and shuffled over to his loveseat, where his standard attire had been left to hang, ready for him to don. "Good morning, chair!"
After properly dressing himself, Ed grinned at the window, soaking in the silver light. Though it had stopped raining, the sky was still overcast from last night's storm. Nonetheless, Ed had a feeling today was going to be a good day. With pep in his step, he strolled towards his door and prepared to greet it, stopping midway when he felt something under his foot…
"Oh! Good morning, Drusilla!"
For a moment, Ed just stared happily at the picture lying underneath his raised foot, taking his time to admire North's artwork of Demi's Lizards & Wizards character that she had graciously decorated her folder with. The folder that she kept her character's information in…
"Oh no!" Concern finally sunk in as Ed picked up the folder and stared at it like it was a nuclear football. "Demi's character sheet! Without it, Drusilla the Darkbound cannot reach Level 10!"
A look of resolve crossed the oaf's face as he tucked the folder under his arm, raised a fist, and marched out of the bedroom and up the stairs. "For the good of the Peach Vale Voyagers and the great Elder Beast Antyo'inushay to whom Drusilla has devoted herself, I, Edmundus Greentoast, must return this sacred text to its rightful owner!"
With his quest at hand, Ed prepared to set out the proper way by first preparing himself breakfast. Upon stepping into the kitchen, the first thing he did was pop some bread in the toaster, followed shortly by him grabbing the orange juice out of the fridge and guzzling down every last drop of what was left in the carton.
Unnoticed at first, Sarah sat at the kitchenette table with a cereal spoon in hand and a raised eyebrow directed at her brother. Seeing Ed so on edge had warranted a break from her Chunky Puffs so she could ponder this unusual sight. "Okay, what did you wake up to find crawling on your bed today?"
"No spiders today, baby sister!" Ed replied, raising the folder for her to see. "Our faithful witch is without her character sheet, and it is my duty as a warrior of the ancient code to return it to her!"
"Oh." Sarah lowered her eyebrows and frowned flatly at Ed. The fact that he was so worked up about one of his roleplay friends forgetting their papers or books or whatever was certainly expected, not to mention underwhelming.
"And once I have completed this hearty breakfast, I shall set out at once to complete this task!"
"You can't!"
"Hm?" Ed had just taken a bite of his freshly-buttered toast when Sarah made her objection. "I can't?"
"Jimmy's getting his retainer off today!" Sarah elaborated. "Mom said you're supposed to walk me to the orthodontist's to pick him up! Remember?"
Ed tapped his bottom lip, pondering long and hard about this new –or rather, old and forgotten– information. It was Monday, wasn't it? He vaguely recalled Sarah and Jimmy discussing an appointment of some sort. And just yesterday, Mom did say something about taking a walk, but was she directing that order at Ed or Dad? Either one wouldn't have been surprising.
"Oh yeah!" His fraternal responsibilities did eventually click in Ed's mind, but that didn't deter him from the quest he had placed upon himself. "But Demi needs this to mark down all her Level 10 powers and upgrades!"
"You have a whole week to get ready for your next game!" Sarah insisted with clear annoyance. "We have two hours to pick up Jimmy!"
"But…" Ed didn't know what to say. Arguing with Sarah was like debating ethics with a very aggressive wall. All he could do was sadly stare back and forth between his sister and Demi's folder, unable to decipher the best course of action.
Seeing his internal struggle, Sarah rolled her eyes and let out a loud groan. It was hard to admit, but sometimes Ed could be just as stubborn as her, even if his thickheadedness was chalked up more to unbreakable ignorance than true tenacity. "Alright, look. The place where Demi's dad works is right down the street from Jimmy's orthodontist. We can stop there on our way back if it'll getcha to stop griping. Okay?"
The proposed compromise immediately snapped Ed out of his conundrum. "DEAL!"
Edd took a deep breath as he stepped out of the bathroom, washed and ready for the day. With one last adjusting tug at his hat, he strode down the stairs and towards the kitchen. The Monday morning silence did little to deter him. It was business as usual, and the empty house offered him a moment of peaceful reverie before he joined the hubbub of the outside world.
Upon entering the kitchen, Edd's first instinct was to inspect the collage of sticky notes that decorated the walls and cupboards. He had most of these notes memorized, both the instructions written on them and their position in the room. The vast majority simply listed his daily chores, reminders, and occasional parental advice. At first glance, he couldn't find any new sticky notes, though perhaps he would spot something out of the ordinary once his mind and senses had been sharpened by a healthy breakfast.
Before he could reach into the refrigerator, Edd did finally notice a new sticky note plastered on the door, front and center. He respectfully paused to read it to himself…
Dear Eddward,
Your father left some important files on his office desk. Please deliver them to him at work around noon. They are in the manila envelope labeled "AKA 099."
~Mother
Edd sighed and nodded, mentally accepting the duty placed upon him. This wasn't the first time he had been asked to bring something to his father's workplace. It was a bit of a walk to get there, but it was hardly a daunting task. Sometimes he questioned why his mother couldn't simply deliver it herself on her way to her own job, but in all honesty, Edd wasn't especially bothered doing it himself, especially not today. Perhaps this was a prime opportunity to obtain information on the portal project…
Eddy didn't want to get out of bed. It may have been summer, but as far as he was concerned, Monday was still Monday, and he didn't care to greet it. To his dismay, though, he had been roused earlier than he would've liked by his parents shouting down the hall. He couldn't make out what they were saying, partially out of exhaustion and partially out of his natural instinct to tune them out, but their painfully audible argument was enough to wake him to a point where sleep stubbornly refused to return to him.
Once his father finally left the house, a good half-hour was spent with Eddy simply lying on his back and scowling at the ceiling. He was really getting fed up with the drama that took place under this roof, as if he didn't get enough of it when his brother was still living at home. Yesterday's conversation on fantasy and escapism was still fresh in his mind, and he had to agree with the sentiment now more than ever. What he wouldn't give to get out of this routine…
He wasn't cognizant of the time, but eventually Eddy mustered the willpower to pull himself out of bed and do something proactive. While he was changing his clothes, however, he caught something out of the corner of his eye: the Lizards & Wizards Player Compendium that Ed had lent him, lying atop his desk. For a moment, Eddy simply stared at the book, at the tattered cover that still barely managed to proudly display the image of what he assumed was a warrior and a mage fending off a dragon. Part of him was still in disbelief that he had agreed to look into the roleplaying venture. The other part…
With a low huff, seeking anything that could potentially lift his spirits, Eddy sat down at the desk and started flipping through the pages, idly scanning the titles and artwork until he found a subject that struck his curiosity. The Thief class. The one that Jonny had recommended for him. Eddy stuck to this section for a moment, if only to see what the fuss was about.
So what could a thief do? Sneak Attack seemed like a given, and it had a lot of potential for damage too. Agile Dodge and Circumvention looked useful against attackers. Boy, this class was allowed an insane amount of skills, wasn't it? Probably to make up for its lack of spellcasting abilities outside of certain archetypes. Wait, they could do what at Level 20? Man, this actually kind of looked like fun…!
The sound of a door slamming caught Eddy's ear, followed shortly by that of the other car pulling out of the driveway. Mom must have been going to the store or her book club or whatever it was she did on Monday mornings that he'd lost track of. Fine by him. It saved him a potentially awkward interaction over his breakfast.
Might as well take it a step further and ensure he wasn't around when his parents came home…
The outside air was thick and muggy, and the roads were slick and outlined with puddles, remnants of the storm the night before. The overcast sky was a powdery grey-blue color, and though the humidity was high, the fog was relatively minimal, just enough that the horizon was obscured, but one could see where they were going.
Edd stepped out his front door, locking it behind him. He paused to take a deep breath of the fresh, earthy smell and the glistening sight of the rain-soaked landscape. He certainly enjoyed the summer sun, but even a grey day such as this was a thing of beauty to the young man. With that sentiment in mind, Edd adjusted the envelope tucked under his arm and started making his way down the driveway, mindful of every water hazard.
Just as he reached the sidewalk, looking over his shoulder at the cul-de-sac behind him, Edd noticed a certain neighbor exiting his own house, his eyes turned in roughly the same direction. For the sake of a friendly greeting, Edd faced his way and called for his attention with a sharp whistle. "Good morning, Eddy!"
As prompted, Eddy came to a halt and glanced across the street, responding to the hailing with a smile and a wave. "Hey, Double D. Where you off to?"
"Mother has instructed me to deliver these documents to Father's workplace," Edd answered, raising the envelope for Eddy to see. "And you?"
Jabbing a thumb towards the top of the cul-de-sac, Eddy replied, "Just dropping by Ed's place. Wanted to ask him something about that game."
"Oh, yes, well…" Edd briefly glimpsed at Ed's house, then turned back to Eddy. "There's a strong chance that he won't be home. If I remember correctly, he's supposed to walk Sarah over to the local orthodontist's office this morning."
"Ah." Eddy stuck his hands in his pockets and looked down the street one more time, then shrugged and crossed the road to join Edd on his side. "Well, 'til he gets back, I'll just stick with you."
"I would certainly appreciate the company!" Edd happily complied, resuming his walk with Eddy now flanking him.
"So…" Eddy scratched his head, straining not to look dumb. "Remind me. What's an orthodontist?"
"An orthodontist is a type of dentist who is specially trained to treat irregularities in the alignment of teeth or jaws."
"Oh, I get it." Eddy smirked as he successfully put two and two together. "So Jimmy's finally getting that choking hazard taken off his face, huh?"
"I'm happy for him," Edd stated, smiling at nothing in particular. "It must have been a hassle to not only keep his retainer properly cleaned, but also to perform the simple tasks of speaking, eating, or even settling into a comfortable position. Now he'll not only have more ease of convenience in his day-to-day routine, but his impeccable smile will make those years of strain worth it!"
"If you say so. There musta been a better way to get those chompers straightened out than to glue a hula hoop to the kid's head."
"That's easy for you to say." Edd's hands secured themselves to his hips. "Need I remind you why Jimmy required his headgear in the first place?"
"No you need not," Eddy bitterly retorted before hastily changing the subject. "So what're you taking to your dad anyway?"
"I'm not entirely certain what these documents detail," Edd admitted, glancing down at the envelope in his hands. "I haven't read any of them for the sake of avoiding classified informatio-!"
With surprising reflexes, easily sensing his companion's mischievous behavior, Edd turned away from Eddy just in time to avoid having the envelope snatched out of his grasp. "And I will not tolerate you snooping around in these files either, thank you!"
"Fine," Eddy grumbled, shoving his sticky fingers back in his pockets. "Probably just a bunch of science mumbo jumbo anyway."
Edd took a deep breath and tucked the envelope under his arm again. "Regardless of the contents within these documents, I am at least hopeful that this venture will open the door to insight on Peach Creek National Laboratory's current ongoing development."
"Oh yeah, the portal thing." Eddy grinned and lightly kicked up a puddle mid-walk. "Wanna see if they've got it up and running so you can finally take that trip to Ed's magical planet?"
After a brief snicker, Edd continued, "If Demi's presumptions towards the nature of this project are true, then color me intrigued. Any progress made within the fields of both transportation and resonance phenomena is bound to be fascinating. If Father permits me, I would very much appreciate the opportunity to inquire about quantum friction."
"Fer the love of…" Eddy had to roll his eyes at all the big words being spat into his ear. "Isn't it summer? Aren't we supposed to be taking a break from learning?"
"We are always learning, Eddy," Edd pompously responded. "Most any opportunity to enrich one's knowledge is well worth engaging. Anything to keep the mind from atrophying."
"I'm starting to regret taking this walk with you."
Edd smirked and shook his head. "Don't be like that, Eddy. If you would allow me this moment to indulge my curiosity, I will gladly join you and Ed in further fantasy adventures afterward."
"Yeah, fine." Eddy smiled back at Edd. Couldn't stay mad at the kid genius for long. "Just promise me that this wizard baloney will all be worth it in the end."
"I can almost guarantee it, Eddy."
North trudged down the stairs with his empty breakfast plate in hand. The house felt stuffy that morning, more so than the outside humidity should've allowed. This coupled with his mostly sleepless night was making his head uncomfortably heavy with fatigue. He knew he only had himself to blame for the lack of rest, having spent countless hours mapping out a potential one-shot Lizards & Wizards campaign, but still, why was the air so darn stiff?
Deftly avoiding the living room, North slipped into the kitchen and loaded the dishwasher. As he stood back up, he was greeted with the answer to his question. The kitchen window was hanging wide open, a fact he had apparently missed while cooking his breakfast in his practically zombified state.
He groaned to himself and slid the window shut, closing off the influx of damp air. How many times had he found the window like this? Why did it have to be opened in even the most unfavorable weather conditions? Did his uncle have no concept of the thermostat, or had North's father simply banned him from touching the device and now he was routinely opening windows to cool off and/or annoy everyone?
Whatever the case was, North was too tired to complain. No one was around to listen anyway.
With that out of the way, North directed his attention to the food and water dishes on the floor in the kitchen corner. He wasn't the only one who needed breakfast. As such, donning a smile, he reached into a cabinet and plucked out a tin of cat food. He peeled off the lid, scooped the food into its dish, then got to work filling up the water bowl.
Partway through the process, North started to get worried. Usually the sound of him opening the can was enough to get Jonesy charging headlong into the kitchen. It wasn't like him to skip out on mealtimes, and taking the open window into consideration, North was quick to assume the worst. It wouldn't have been the first time, after all.
He tried to shake that thought out of his head until proven otherwise, exiting the kitchen to look for Jonesy. A full search of the house was promptly conducted. He wasn't on the litterbox. He wasn't hiding under the basement couch, North's bed, or any piece of furniture for that matter. Not in the office, not in the dining room, and when North's search led him back to the kitchen, he was disappointed to find that the cat hadn't caught up to him there either.
Another groan escaped his throat as he glanced back at the living room couch. He could just barely see his uncle's legs dangling off the side, turned towards the TV as it broadcast one of his crime shows. Oh, how he wished he could have one day without that blight on his life weighing him down.
Once again taking initiative, North retreated back upstairs and into his room. It was clear that Jonesy was not in the house. There was no way of knowing how long he had been gone, and there was way too much ground for North to cover alone. He needed help, and he knew where to find it-
CLUNK~
"Ow…!" Stupid mandolin. He needed to find a better place to stow it than up against his bed. Like in the garbage. Why was his mom forcing him to learn how to play this thing anyway?
Ignoring the accursed instrument, North reached under his bed, procuring a box, from which he retrieved a small orange gun and a flare cartridge. He opened his window, then loaded the gun. Sticking his arms outside and at a high angle, he shot the flare into the open air, watching the ball of red light whiz across the grey sky.
"Okay, okay, but how about this?" Jonny argued as he playfully swung on a tree branch. "What if I designed a campaign based on that book series you've been reading? Would you wanna play then?"
He glanced down at Plank, idly leaning against the tree trunk, offering his nonverbal response.
"You always say you'll 'think about it,' but you always say no by the end!" Jonny complained. "I know you're trying to let me down easy, buddy, but you know what this game means to me. It'd mean a lot if you just tried it. Look at Eddy! He's giving it a shot!"
"..."
"Haha! Yeah, he is kind of a scrub. Whatever that means. But at least he's trying to- WHOA!"
A sudden, blaring noise startled Jonny out of the tree and sent him crashing ungracefully onto the lawn. Pushing past the discomfort in the arm he had landed on, Jonny paused for a moment to be thankful for the fact that one, he hadn't been higher up, and two, he was on the ground and not wedged between two branches again. His focus quickly snapped back to the sound… that of a cow imitating a siren.
"The ranger alarm! C'mon, Plank!"
Jonny quickly scooped up the smiling hunk of wood and darted into his house. In record time, he darted back out, he and Plank now dressed in their Urban Ranger uniforms. Huffing, puffing, never daring to slow down, Jonny scampered across his backyard and leaped the fence, landing in his neighbor's humble farm.
Rolf continued to crank his cow's tail, prompting her to broadcast her beck and call across the cul-de-sac. He watched as Jonny and Plank made their arrival, the former sprinting across the field, skidding to a halt in front of him, and finally pulling himself into the customary Urban Ranger salute. After offering the duo a curt nod, Rolf let the siren ring for another couple of seconds, looking around, waiting and watching. However, when it seemed like no one else was coming, he called off the alarm, dismissed the cow, and jumped straight into action.
"Urban Rangers!" Marching closer to Jonny, arms folded behind his back, Rolf elaborated, "We have been summoned to perform a frisk and recovery mission! Where is Ranger Jimmy?"
"Uh, I'm not sure. Did Jimmy say he was going somewhere today, Plank?" Jonny asked, glancing down at his companion. After giving Plank a moment to speak, Jonny looked back up at Rolf with an affirmative nod. "Oh yeah! He's getting his retainer off today, sir!"
"Ahh, so the delicate one's dental fixture has completed its purpose," Rolf mused, rubbing his chin. "Very good. Rolf will not reprimand Ranger Jimmy for his absence. He already possesses the Feline Rescue badge, after all."
Feline rescue? "Uh-oh. North lose his cat again?"
"It would seem that way," Rolf confirmed. "We will begin our search in the community of industry. Keep a watchful eye and cover your ground, but do not stray far from Rolf's ear."
"Yes, sir!"
With the mission made clear, Rolf stood tall, gripped his fists, and performed an about-face, turning his back to Jonny and placing the two in a straight line. "March!"
With Rolf leading the way, his and Jonny's footsteps in perfect rhythm, the three Urban Rangers paraded out of the farm, down the sidewalk, and towards the industrial district of downtown Peach Creek, ready to carry out their responsibility to their neighbor and friend.
Kevin briefly paused his work, looking up from his bike to watch the Urban Rangers march past on the opposite side of the street. Well, three of them, at least; Fluffy seemed to be absent today. The ridiculous image earned a scoff from the jock. Where were they off to with such pomp and circumstance? Probably going to save a cat from a tree or something mediocre like that. What sheep.
Leaving the urban losers to their business, Kevin resumed his repair job. All he had to do was oil up the chain and his bike would be ready to ride again. A few drops here, a few there, turn the pedals and revel in the whisper-quiet crank of the gears… perfect!
Kevin beamed with pride as he placed his tools back in their box and turned his bike right-side up. After all that hard work, he was ready to have some fun with this baby. He hastily returned his toolbox to their proper spot in the garage and dusted his hands off, ready to ride.
As he stepped back outside, however, he noticed something up the street. One of the houses had its garage door up, one that had not been raised in two weeks. Moreover, there was clearly a car parked inside, one that he had not seen in the same amount of time.
"Nazz?"
An eager smile spread across Kevin's face as he hopped atop his bike and started tearing asphalt. "YO, NAZZ!"
He raced across the cul-de-sac, screeching to a halt in the selected driveway. Without missing a beat, he leaped back off, lowered the kickstand, then bolted up to the front door and gave it an enthusiastic knock. It felt like it had been a lifetime since he'd last seen Nazz, and he was absolutely elated –a word not often used to describe Kevin– to have her back.
A few seconds passed, waiting for someone to answer. Finally, the door flew open, revealing the blonde beauty. "Kevin!"
"Hey, Nazz!" Kevin gleefully hollered, pulling Nazz into a joyous embrace which she did not hesitate to return. "Missed ya, babe! When'd ya get back?!"
"Just last night!" Nazz laughed, equally as excited to be back among friends. "It's so good to see ya again!"
"You too!" Kevin repeated, setting Nazz on her feet again. "How was the karate tournament?"
"Ehh…" Nazz tilted her head back and forth and forced a toothy grin. She was still happy, certainly, but there was a clear air of annoyance in her expression and tone now. "Came in second. Furthest I've ever made it, but y'know…" She then folded her arms and pursed her lips in a slight scowl. "Stupid cheating Lemon Brook sophomore… Guy went for the face like four times, I swear."
"Man, that's bunk," Kevin grunted sympathetically. "I mean, second place, that's pretty dope. But I haven't even met this dirtbag, and even I know you deserved it more than him."
"Thanks, Kevin," Nazz giggled, making an effort to lighten up for the sake of not souring their reunion. "So how've things been around here?"
"Been pretty boring without ya. Weeks just kinda dragged on with nothin' to tell. Even the dorks have practically vanished; been spending most of their time playing some RPG or whatever."
"Well gee, that's no way to spend the summer!" Nazz insisted.
"I know. I've been itching for some action." Kevin briefly glimpsed his hotrod over his shoulder, then turned and smiled back at Nazz. "Well, now that you're here, you feel up to takin' a spin?"
"Totally!" Nazz quickly stepped outside in full, closing the door behind her. "Let's go!"
"Awesome!" Leading the way, Kevin dashed back down the driveway and over to his bike. He offered Nazz a gentlemanly hand, helping her into a comfortable sitting position between the handlebars. Then he settled himself down on the seat, exchanging a tender smile with Nazz. Just like old times…
One swift retraction of the kickstand later, Kevin and Nazz were gliding down the street and into town…
It was taking Demi a while to figure out how she was going to spend her Monday. She'd run her minuscule supply of books dry and she wasn't in the mood to re-reread any of them. She didn't have any money to spend at the pawnshop. She lacked the supplies she needed for her usual games, and besides, she knew she would be grounded if she filled the house with balloons again. It was such a perfect scheme, though. Put five dollars in one balloon, fill one with noxious gas, and have Mia pop every balloon until she found one or the other.
So for the first couple hours of consciousness, Demi, bored out of her skull, sat on her bed and carved Wiccan symbols into the wall while pop-punk music blasted through her radio. She didn't like school, but she honestly kind of wished it was that time of year already, because then she would at least have somewhere to be. Granted, when she was in school, she wished that she was somewhere else. She hated having obligations, but she hated having nothing to do too. Really, she just hated most things.
Demi let out a disgruntled sigh, then took a deep breath and blew the loose drywall shavings off of her newly-etched witch's knot. With that done, she immediately began a new carving, this time with no real direction initially in mind. She started with a rounded, upside-down triangle, then she stared at it for a moment, contemplating her next move. She drew a small circle inside the triangle, then another next to it, then four half-circles, one in the middle, one on each side, and one big one near the bottom like a big, dopey grin. She connected the two circles at the top with a thick line…
"DEMIIIII…!"
Mia's shrill voice cut through the music like rusty nails, causing Demi to flinch and slice a crooked line across the wall. Her bedroom door flew open and the obnoxious ball of blonde-haired, yellow dress-clad sunshine behind it made herself seen. She raised the wireless phone in her hand for Demi to see. "Daddy wants to talk to you!"
"I'm pretty sure I said to stay outta my room," Demi grunted, tossing her knife onto the foot of her bed and climbing off to meet her little sister in the doorway.
Mia's mouth opened in a wide smile, exposing the gaps where her baby teeth had fallen out. Her eyes were trained on the wall that Demi had marked up. "Are you drawing your boyfriend?!"
"No, I'm drawing your real dad."
"I'm telling Daddy you said that!" Mia pressed the phone to her ear. "Daddy…!"
"Beat it, you little pimple!" Demi snarled, snatching the phone out of Mia's hand, shoving her back out into the hall, and finally slamming and locking the door. Once again in relative solitude, Demi held the phone up to her ear. "What is it, Dad?"
An almost immediate groan escaped Demi's throat as the conversation predictably began with her dad bawling her out for the exchange between her and Mia he had overheard. She slumped into her mushroom chair and pulled the phone away from her ear until her dad's voice was a mere drone mostly drowned out by the music. Once it seemed like he had stopped talking, she spoke into the phone again, offering a begrudging apology. She clearly didn't mean it and he clearly knew it, but this was typical behavior of his oldest daughter.
After that, there was only one matter that they needed to address. The investors had shown up to work wanting to see the progress on the new apparatus, but Dad had left the files with the color bar test patterns on his home desktop. He needed her to put the files on a flash drive and bring them to him, and he needed her to do that now. Right now. Did she understand?
"Yeah, Dad, I get it," Demi grunted with annoyance. "If it's so important to you, I'll take a break from slaughtering goats and praying to Cthulhu to bring you some color charts."
There came another scolding for her tone. In one ear and out the other. Bottom line, bring the flash drive.
"Okay, Dad, whatever you say. See you in ten."
Demi hung up without another word. She stood up, turned off her radio, then stepped out into the hallway and down to her father's office, ready to get this procedure done and over with. At least now she had something to do, even if that something was stupid and boring.
"So how do ya feel, Jimmy?"
"I-It feels kinda strange," Jimmy answered, massaging his upper lip and smiling meekly at Sarah. "I've gotten so used to wearing it that I feel like I'm overcompensating every time I close my mouth."
"But just think!" Sarah cheered him on. "After a few days, I bet it's gonna feel like the best thing in the world to have your teeth finally free!"
"It does already feel pretty good," Jimmy giggled. "It'll just take a little getting used to!"
"Well, I think you look spiffy, bucko!" Ed stated enthusiastically, marching alongside the two youngsters with pep in his step and the folder still in his hand.
"Thank you, Ed! I've been waiting for this day for so long now. I hope it was worth the effort."
"Sure it was!" Sarah insisted. "Now come on! Let's go home and celebrate! I got dark chocolate caramels with your name on them!"
Jimmy's eyes lit up like the Fourth of July. "Oh yay, Sarah! No more gooey caramel in my retainer!"
"YUMMY!" Regardless of whether he was invited in on this party, Ed was enthralled by the idea. However, even this delicious proposal did not distract him from his true mission. "But we gotta deliver Drusilla's documents directly!"
"Oh, right…" Sarah muttered in begrudging disappointment. She did promise they would do that. "Well, let's hurry it up then."
Jimmy twiddled his thumbs for a moment, sharing Sarah's dismay at their delayed gratification. At the very least, he tried to liven the mood again by offering Ed a genuine compliment. "Nice alliteration, Ed!"
"Thank you!" Ed chimed back. "I've been told I have a good figure."
Sarah sighed and squinted her eyes, pinpointing the Peach Creek National Laboratory through the fog. "At least it's not a long walk from here. Saves us some time."
"Wait, we're going there?" Jimmy questioned, curling inward at the sight of the industrial compound in the near distance, silhouetted against the grey skyline.
"Yeah, Ed's gotta drop something off to Demi. Her dad works there, so…"
"That place scares me," Jimmy whimpered. "It's so mechanical and uninviting. What do they even do in there?"
"They're building a portal!" Ed happily replied. "So that we may travel to worlds unknown and discover their secret secrets!"
"That's just stupid, Ed," Sarah spat. "Ya gotta stop living in that game you guys play. It's messing with your brain more so than usual."
"Mom says I gotta keep something active! Why not the 'magination?!" Ed decreed with an excited twirl. He then started charging down the street and towards the great laboratory. "Now let's go!"
Jimmy pressed a hand to his sternum, watching anxiously as Ed scurried ahead of them. "Do we have to, Sarah?"
Sarah sighed and glared at the sky. "I told him he would, and he's just gonna mope and dope if we don't." She smiled a little and took Jimmy's hand. "It won't take long. We'll just pop right by the front door and be home in a flash, okay?"
Mustering a smile of his own, Jimmy took a deep breath and nodded. "Okay."
"Wait up, stupid!" Sarah hollered as she and Jimmy started chasing after Ed. Hearing her call, Ed slowed down just enough for them to catch up, then continued leading the charge towards their destination. The various businesses that occupied the industrial district disappeared behind them as they neared the wide, private lot, crossing the several hundred acres that separated the lab from the rest of the town.
As the complex drew ever closer, something appeared just out of the corner of their eyes.
"Huh?" Ed's attention span was a chaotic thing, so much so that his focus on this singular task of bringing Demi her character sheet was something to behold. Nonetheless, the new elements to the equation did draw his eyes away from the lab, but for a rather appropriate reason.
"Eddy! Double D!"
Several dozen yards away, the two young men walking across the field snapped in the direction of the voice. Their smiles were apparent even from a distance. The jog continued with both parties slightly rerouting their courses to meet halfway, slowing to a halt upon reunion.
Ed was the first to speak up as he approached. "Hi guys!"
"Hey, Lumpy!" Eddy casually greeted his cohort.
"Good morning, Ed!" Edd picked up. "Sarah! Jimmy! You look fantastic! How was the procedure?"
"It went well!" Jimmy gladly responded, showing off his pearly whites. "Thanks for asking!"
"What're you guys doing here?" Sarah asked, opting to get right to the point.
Before Edd had a chance to explain himself, Eddy jabbed a thumb in his direction and stated, "Double D's gotta drop off some nerd files to his dad."
"Ooh, me too!" Ed replied, holding up the folder in his hands. "To Demi's dad, not Double D's!"
Edd leaned forward, easily recognizing the artwork decorating the folder. "Demi left her character sheets at your house? Well, I suppose this is one way to go about returning them…"
"And return them I shall! Onward!" With this decree, Ed resumed the trek towards the lab. Sarah rolled her eyes but followed alongside Jimmy with no other protest.
Eddy shrugged at Edd before they too joined the group, muttering all the while, "Gotta hand it to him. The big lug finally found a girl no one would go for besides him."
"Oh, please, Eddy. Affable gestures do not automatically equate with romantic affections," Edd sternly mumbled back. His displeased frown quickly snapped back into an eager grin as they approached the sprawling laboratory, raising his arm in a sweeping gesture. "This is it, fellows. Peach Creek's own cradle of scientific discovery!"
"Looks like a sweatshop," Eddy grunted, taking in the sight. The three-story, labyrinthine, concrete building sat in the middle of the field, clear on the other side of a fifteen-foot tall, barbed wire perimeter fence that spanned the length of two football fields. Behind the fence, between them and the main facility, half-dead grass gave way to tarmac surfaces littered with various machines and construction vehicles. Not exactly the most welcoming atmosphere.
"Yeah, I'm sure whatever they do here is very important," Sarah muttered, graciously allowing Jimmy to timidly cling to her arm. "Now can we hurry up and drop off these papers so we can get outta here?"
"Gotta side with the twerp on this one," Eddy responded, drawing closer to the fence. "So come on! Let's take a shortcut!"
Edd slowly drew his eyes away from the lab to follow Eddy's trail. Where they landed was on a small hole in the fence, just big enough for any one of them to squeeze through, which Eddy was already in the process of. Edd's eyes widened and his jaw dropped at the suggestion. "Eddy, what are you doing?! We can't go in there!"
"It's a shortcut, Sockhead!" Eddy reiterated. "Walking around this fence is gonna take forever! I'm a busy guy!"
"Level 10 waits for no man!" Ed insisted, crawling through the gap and blissfully following Eddy across the lot.
Sarah darted closer to the fence, gripping the chain links and staring aghast at her brother and his half-pint friend. "Ed, you nitwit! You get back here!"
Edd fidgeted in place, staring out at Ed and Eddy, then at Sarah and Jimmy, then at the distant lab, then back at Ed and Eddy. He knew that this was wrong on so many moral and ethical levels, but he also knew that between Eddy's rebelliousness and Ed's ignorance, turning them back around would be no easy task. Thus, against his better judgment, Edd cautiously inched his way through the breach in the fence and chased after his companions. "Wait! Stop! This is government property!"
Jimmy was mortified at the sight of the Eds on the other side of the fence, blindly wandering into who knows what. "We shouldn't be here, Sarah. What do you think will happen to them?"
"Nothin'll happen."
Sarah and Jimmy whipped around to find that another party member had arrived with surprising stealth. Demi paid the duo little mind, strutting right past them and easily ducking through the hole in the fence. "I come this way all the time. Never hurt me."
"What's this huge lot for anyway?" Sarah demanded, quickly getting fed up with the blatant recklessness on display.
Demi turned to face the young ones, walking backwards towards the lab. "They used to use this fenced-off area to test their bigger machines. Now it's basically a scrapyard. Haven't done an experiment out here in years." Then she turned back around and continued on her way.
For a moment, Sarah could only stand there slack-jawed and arm raised, fully prepared to argue but unable to enunciate her case. Eventually she smacked her hand against her forehead and growled. The girl that Ed was trying to deliver these papers to had walked right past them! If they had just waited outside the fence for thirty seconds…!
"But we could still get in trouble for being here!" Jimmy insisted. "What if a brute from security comes down here and…?"
Jimmy trailed off, his wide eyes fixed on some distant point. His fretful, spacey expression quickly garnered concern from Sarah. "What's the matter, Jimmy?"
"Over there!"
Sarah followed Jimmy's finger, looking past the fence for whatever had caught his attention. Her initial fear was that a member of the laboratory staff had discovered them, but this quickly proved to be false. No one else seemed to be on the premises. What she did notice was a conspicuous speck of orange wandering among the greys of the steel pillars and concrete ground.
She leaned into the fence again, squinting and straining to make out the orange shape. "Is that a cat?"
"I think that's North's kitty, Sarah!" Jimmy stated worriedly. "He must've gotten out of the house again."
"Well, he shouldn't be in there either," Sarah insisted, anxiously looking back at Jimmy. After both internally and verbally complaining about trespassing as much as she had, she couldn't believe she was about to suggest this, but her anxiousness was escalating to a point where she couldn't bear standing around on the outside much longer. "Should we go after him? I know going in there is probably a stupid idea, but if the worst that can happen is someone will come down and yell at us, then we might as well make the argument that we were helping a friend."
Jimmy nervously bit down on his knuckle. He checked over his shoulder, scanning every inch of the lab's property. The scene was still as cold and intimidating as ever, but it really did seem like they were alone out there. For the sake of an innocent cat, it felt wrong to stand idly by. "I wouldn't be doing my Feline Rescue merit badge justice if I didn't, right?"
"Right! We'll slip right in and back out before anyone even knows we're here," Sarah proclaimed, dropping to her hands and knees, weaseling her way through the gap, then scampering across the tarmac and towards the runaway cat.
Jimmy promptly followed suit, briefly getting his sleeve caught on a loose bit of fencing but freeing himself with little fuss. Then he sprang to his feet and chased after Sarah. "Wait for me, girlfriend!"
His holler, though not shouted at the top of his lungs, was just loud enough to be heard across the lot. Incidentally, at the edge where the spacious field met the woods, Jimmy's fellow Urban Ranger happened to be within earshot. Jonny perked up and dashed out into the open, staring down from the slight hilltop at the laboratory grounds. Through his and Plank's combined eagle-eyeing, he managed to spot a couple of familiar figures.
"Hey, Rolf!" Jonny whipped around and called out to his troop leader, just visible through the trees. "Plank and I found Jimmy! And he found Jonesy!"
Rolf looked up from the bush he had been checking under. Near simultaneously, North popped out from behind a tree several yards away. While the latter let out a sigh of relief, the former straightened up and happily responded, "Ah, yes, good! Let us rendezvous with the absent ranger and see this safe retrieval through!"
"Follow us!" Jonny gladly commanded, facing forward and dashing out into the field, making a beeline for the fence.
Upon stepping out of the forest alongside Rolf, North tilted his head at the sight. "This place again? Boy, Jonesy's been wandering around here a whole heck of a lot lately. Maybe he's curious about the portal project too."
"A portal, you say?" Rolf questioned. "Tell Rolf, is this truly the hocus pocus being concocted within this twisted complex of industry?"
"Apparently, according to Demi."
North slowed to a stop when he noticed Jonny doing the same. The Urban Ranger was trying to scope out the scene on the other side of the fence. "How'd those guys get in there?"
"I think there's a hole in the fence over here…" North replied, walking along the perimeter in search of the breach. "If I'm remembering correctly… Ah, here it is!"
North was quick to tuck and roll inside. Jonny wasted no time following his example, holding Plank against his chest as he squeezed his way in. Rolf was not quite so hasty. "Ranger Jonny! Specky North-Boy! Aye-yi-yi…!" Even still, post-facepalm, it didn't take long for Rolf to make his way onto the other side to chase after the runaways. "Do not tread your feet on the verboten grounds! In Rolf's country, setting foot uninvited on another's land has started many a family feud!"
"It'll just be a second, Rolf!" North insisted, following Sarah and Jimmy's trail in search of his cat.
And coincidentally, at that same time, Kevin and Nazz were biking through. Their trip had been smooth sailing so far, speeding down hills, weaving down streets, popping wheelies, simply enjoying each other's company… Their wheels eventually brought them to the industrial district, skirting along the outer limits.
Nazz stared ahead from her perch on the handlebars, soaking in the view of her hometown and the sights of an area she traveled to very infrequently. Off to their right was the looming image of the town's national laboratory, where something just outside it caught her eye.
"Hey Kevin, look!" Nazz pointed towards the lab, prompting Kevin to follow her line of sight. "Is that Rolf? And… Jonny and North?"
Kevin squinted, scrutinizing the blue shapes crawling through the enormous fence in the distance. "Yeah, you're right. What're those guys doing in there?"
"Isn't that the lab where Double D's dad works?"
"Pretty sure. His and that creepy Demi girl's." His curiosity piqued, Kevin turned his bike towards the lab and pedaled onward. "Something weird's goin' on. Let's go check it out."
"Man, what a dump." Eddy folded his arms and took a good look around at the scene tucked inside the perimeter fence. Rows upon rows of latticed columns lined the tarmac, the pattern occasionally broken by strange, ten-foot cast blocks of unknown purpose. Thick, high-voltage cable harnesses spread across the ground, forcing the Eds to jump over them every twenty or so feet.
"This is where the secret sciencey secrets happen, Eddy!" Ed chimed, admiring the construction work despite understanding none of it.
"And that is precisely why I must insist we turn back!" Edd desperately pressed, shaking with trepidation every time he stepped over a cable. "Not only are we recklessly traipsing through potentially dangerous equipment, but if we're caught in here, we will be in serious, genuine trouble with the law, not to mention our parents!"
"Lighten up, Sockhead," Eddy chided. "It's not like we're here to steal nothin'. We're just a buncha kids dropping stuff off! Not our fault we don't know the way around."
"I think the barbed wire fence was a pretty clear indicator that wherever we're supposed to be, it isn't in here!"
"Hey, if they cared so much about keeping folks out, they woulda fixed that hole. Besides, your dad works here! If worse comes to worst, I'm sure they'll let us down easy for that reason alone."
"Reveal to me your secrets, mighty metal pillar of space and time!" Ed exclaimed, raising his arms to one of the columns as they passed by.
"I don't think any of its secrets are worth knowing."
"GAH!" Eddy jumped and turned around, looking just as startled as Edd clearly was to see that Demi had joined their group. "Where'd you come from?!"
"DEMI~!"
"Hey, Ed." Demi donned a brief smirk as she nodded to the oaf, then resumed her typical deadpan frown as she walked alongside the boys. "What brings you guys to the scrapyard?"
"We're making deliveries!" Ed proclaimed. "Oh, here ya go! This one's for you!"
Demi blinked at the sight of the folder Ed was extending to her. She hadn't even realized she'd left it at his house, but she certainly accepted it with gratitude. "Oh. Thanks."
"Well, now that that exchange has been made…" Edd awkwardly piped up. "…perhaps we should be on our way?"
"Double D, it's fine. There's nothing in here that can hurt us," Demi flatly insisted, glancing around at the multitude of towers. "Granted, it's been a while since I've been down this way and I don't remember these things being here. Looks like the guys have been hard at work around here. That's new."
"What're these things even supposed to be?" Eddy questioned, kicking at a cable. "A buncha cellphone towers? Stupid elaborate metal detectors?"
"Is this the portal machine, Demi?!" Ed asked excitedly, scratching his nose.
Demi merely shrugged in return. "Ya got me. I zone out whenever Dad talks business. Or talks in general."
"Snff… Ahh…"
"Well, if this construction work is recent, I think that's all the more reason for us to vacate the premises," Edd reiterated. "We wouldn't want to inadvertently damage something vital."
"Ahhhhh…!"
"Hey, we're bein' careful!" Eddy insisted, tiptoeing over another yet cable. "See? Light as a feather. We're not gonna-"
"AAAAAHHHHH… CHOO!"
The ground they stood upon practically shook from the force of Ed's sneeze, stymieing his companions for a moment or two. Edd clutched his chest and anxiously looked around, ensuring that nothing was out of place and no one was coming after them. "Goodness… Bless you, Ed."
Ed sniffled and wobbled dizzily in place. "I sneezed."
"We noticed. Maybe that's why," Eddy bluntly stated, pointing over the others' shoulders. "Ain't that North's cat?"
Sure enough, upon turning around, the gang spotted a ginger tabby cat scurrying their way. Following close behind, Sarah and Jimmy were chasing after the animal, the latter calling out to him, "Jonesy, come back! It's dangerous in here!"
"Oh dear…" Edd's face dropped into his hand. It was bad enough that his closest friends were breaking and entering on dangerous grounds, but to see their two youngest associates following suit only complicated matters.
Jonesy did not respond to the call of his name. He simply continued to dash down the row of columns, only stopping when he reached Demi. Once there, he greeted the girl with a gentle nudge before proceeding to rub against her leg.
"Heh…" Demi smiled at the sight. In general, animals were one thing she didn't hate, mostly on account of them not being people. In response to the affection, Demi reached down and picked Jonesy up, tenderly scratching behind his ears. "Ya little scamp."
"Whew…!" Sarah slowed to a halt, pausing to catch her breath. "Thanks, Demi."
"The little guy had us worried!" Jimmy added.
"Awwwww…" Ed walked over to Demi, beaming at the adorable sight of her and the cat. He bent over to look the little fluffball in the face. "Hello, Jonesy!"
Jonesy mewled in response, reaching out to lick Ed's nose. The affectionate act only served to fan the flames of Ed's allergies, causing his face to scrunch up and prompting him to retreat so he didn't sneeze in Jonesy or Demi's faces.
"Jonesy?"
All eyes turned in the direction Sarah and Jimmy had just come from. North was fast approaching, followed closely by Jonny and Rolf. The relief on North's face was plain to see. "There you are!"
"ACHOO!"
"Jonny! Rolf!" Jimmy was taken aback at the sight of the Urban Ranger uniforms. "Oh phooey, did I miss a meeting?"
"Fret not, boy Jimmy," Rolf graciously responded. "Your dentistry-related absence is an acceptable excuse. This gathering of the Urban Rangers was prompted solely for the purpose of reclaiming North-Boy's feline friend."
"Lookin' good there, chief!" Jonny cheered regarding Jimmy's newfound lack of a retainer.
North gave Jonesy a rub on the head, allowing Demi a moment longer to hold him. "You can't keep running off like that, buddy!"
"Seriously, like, how many times has that cat gotten out of the house?" Eddy grunted. "It's time to invest in an electric fence."
"Yes, because hypocrisy is absolutely hilarious!" Edd objected, frowning at Eddy.
"Whoa, hey!" Jonny donned a big smile as he looked over his shoulder. "Nazz is back from her karate tournament!"
Once again, everyone's attention was directed to the newest arrivals. Nazz wandered down the row, looking around at the strange equipment, while Kevin's focus was on the group. "Rolf? Jonny? Eds? What's everyone doing here?"
"That is an excellent question, Kevin!" Edd shouted, well and truly exasperated by this point. "None of us should be in here!"
Completely missing the point, Sarah excitedly dashed over to greet Nazz. Jonny walked up as well and gleefully asked, "Hey, Nazz! How'd ya do?!"
"Eh, fine. Came in second."
"Whoa, not bad!"
"Did they give you a trophy?!"
"That's amazing! You go, girl!"
"Rolf offers his compliments to this achievement in the martial arts!"
"Yeah, but why are we here?"
"ACHOOOOO!"
"Geez, Ed, maybe don't stick your face in the cat's!"
"Aww, Jonesy likes you, Demi."
"I like him too. Wanna trade him for my sister?"
"PEOPLE, PLEASE!" Edd's desperate, aggravated plea broke through the din of overlapping conversations. "We are standing among delicate, potentially hazardous machinery in the middle of government-sanctioned property! WE NEED TO-!"
FWOOOOOOOOOOOOM
Everyone on the premises was struck with sharp, simultaneous headaches, some stumbling in place while others locked up on the spot. The ground vibrated and a deep, high-pitched, rumbling noise filled the air like the roar of a low-flying jet. White-blue light seemed to ignite from every direction, enveloping each member of the group in St. Elmo's fire.
"Rrrrrgh…!" Eddy felt dizzy, nauseous, completely unable to move while the world moved around him. "What's goin' on?!"
"I told you!" Edd snapped, holding his pounding head. "I told you we were asking for trouble by breaking in here!"
"Everything is so shiny!" Ed hollered, somewhere in between intrigued and genuinely unnerved by the phenomenon.
Through the near-blinding haze, wisps of light flashed here and there, shimmering in such a way that the very atmosphere around them seemed to distort. The glow became so intense that, in a way, it actually seemed to dim in everyone's eyes, but the cacophonous ring only grew stronger, drilling into the kids' temples with an unbearable screech.
"Ah-aaaaahhh…!" Jimmy was horribly disoriented and scared out of his wits. He tried to look around, despite the white light only worsening his headache. He could just barely make out a pink and orange shape among the fog. "Sarah?!"
"Jimmy?!"
The two made eye contact through the haze. Jimmy reached out and tried to bring himself closer to Sarah, but in his confusion, he ended up tripping over himself with a startled cry. There was no impact. In the blink of an eye, Jimmy seemed to vanish entirely into a shimmer, his voice echoing a second longer before going silent.
"JIMMY!"
"HOLY COW!" Jonny, having paid unfortunate witness to the event, made a mad dash in the direction his fellow ranger had just disappeared. He inadvertently crashed into Sarah, both of them yelping as they collapsed on top of each other and were spirited away in another shimmer.
"Kevin?!" Nazz blindly waved her hands around, squinting from the brightness and the migraine. "Where are you?!"
"Nazz! I'm right here!"
"I can't see you!"
There was no response from Kevin this time.
"Kevin!" Nazz stumbled forward, trying to follow where she last heard his voice. "Kevin, say some-AAH!"
"AIYEE!" Rolf was mortified. Kevin and Nazz had disappeared before his very eyes. Everyone else around him seemed to have suffered the same fate. "The devil's haze will consume us all!" He took a step back, emitting a guttural noise as he too found himself at the mercy of a shimmer.
"Oh my God oh my God oh my God…" North desperately looked around. Within their distorted sphere, all he could see were the Eds, Demi, and Jonesy huddled up against the latter. "Where is everyone?!"
"I… don't… know…!" Edd shouted in terror, his hands still firmly clamped to his head.
Demi was breathing wildly, holding North's spooked cat protectively against her chest. She glanced behind her, straining to see Ed through the ripples. The poor lug didn't know where to look, but eventually his eyes met hers. "Demi?"
Steeling her nerves, holding her breath, Demi took a shaky first step towards Ed.
In one second, Ed saw Demi approaching him. In the next, she was gone.
"DEMI!"
"DEMI! JONESY!" North leaped after the girl and his cat, swinging his arms in a feeble attempt to catch them…
"NORTH!" And just like that, Ed watched North vanish too. "NORTH BUDDY! DEMI! BABY SISTER!"
"DOUBLE D!" Eddy screamed over the ear-splitting din. "WHADDA WE DO?!"
Edd was hyperventilating as he looked around. Aside from his two best friends, he could neither see nor hear any of the other kids accompanying them. They were alone in this madhouse of sensory overload, and there was no telling what had happened to the others or what could happen to them. He was at a complete loss. Should they run? Should they keep still and hope whoever was controlling this anomaly realized there were people on the testing ground? What physical consequences would they suffer if they attempted either? Edd was simply too terrified and too pained to come up with a plan.
"DOUBLE DEEEEE!"
"I DON'T KNOW, EDDY!"
The earth-shattering phenomenon seemed to have no end. The trio was rooted to the ground, too scared to move. Eddy stared at Edd in desperate frustration, feeling like he was seconds away from exploding. Edd tightly curled inward, cushioning his head, struggling to think clearly. But in the midst of the chaos and confusion, hysterical over the disappearance of his friends and his sister, reacting to the pain with nothing more than pure instinct, Ed was the first to panic…
"RUN AWAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYY!"
Ed scooped Edd up in one arm. He grabbed Eddy with the other. He prepared to make a mad dash out of there.
He took only one step before the ground disappeared beneath them.
