Alive

By: Aviantei

12 mph


The first time the world looked gray to me was around the time I was twelve.

It was after my mom died.

Mom was always this energetic force in our lives. She and Dad both worked, but Mom never gave up a chance for adventure. She would always take me and Nate out to the park, to play a game of street hockey with the neighbors, anything. She had this pleasant aura to her, but she's where Nate and I get our reckless streaks from. We always joked that it was a miracle she and a straight-laced guy like Dad ended up married.

And then she was in a pedestrian accident, and I mean from the pedestrian side of things, so you can guess how that went.

We were young at that time. Like I said, I was twelve, Nate was seven, had Caleb wasn't even two yet. I remember the funeral, with everyone dressed in black—me in a blouse and skirt, Nate in his tiny suit, and Caleb too young to tell what the fuck was going on. I didn't even realize that color had vanished from the world until I looked at Mom in her casket and realized she looked like some old black and white photo, not the vivid red hair I remembered.

Everything wasn't gray at that point. The world flashed back to vivid color almost too quickly. Dad took several weeks off for mourning, his cop know-how guiding him through the whole sordid experience of filing a lawsuit against the driver that did it. It wasn't even some mystery to solve: the traffic camera at the intersection showed the driver was at fault, they agreed to payout the court mandated settlement, and that was that. No more Mom for us, just some money.

Once that whole mess settled down, we had to move back to life. Dad went back to work, Nate and I went back to school, and an aunt and uncle who lived nearby but didn't have kids of their own helped take care of us.

I almost thought I'd been imagining it, that grayscale version of my mom, looking artificially pretty and clean in her coffin. Except every now and then, when I wasn't distracting myself with life and started thinking about her, the color drained from everything. Just for the moment, flickers here and there.

A couple years passed, and Caleb became a toddler, and Nate hit double digits, and I was in high school, making a total fool of myself. I'd always been reckless, so I won't say Mom dying caused that, but I started to notice that, no matter how sad I was feeling, so long as I got my blood pumping, everything was okay. The world never turned gray like that. It was just another reason to go hunt down the next thrill on the menu.

My high school days were a mess.

My entrance into young adulthood wasn't much better.

But I kept on pushing it and got hella lucky. A few fortunate victories while gambling and running around in other nonsense set me up for life. So I had free reign to do whatever the fuck I wanted, without any concern for the cost. More money than any one person has any right to have in their life.

I wasn't exactly tracking it or anything, but the gray got worse.

Until it clouded my whole vision.

The entire damn world some ancient strip of film, without a single speck of color in it.

But when I listened to Alexander—


Once we finish up our picnic, we loaded everything back in the car and set off for Alexander's place. We didn't even come close to finishing up my overwhelming feast of a brunch, but I have no qualms about gorging myself on leftovers for the next week or so. Unlike the ride to the track, I now sit up in my seat, torn over what to look at first.

The world is such a lush spread of color I don't know what to do with myself. It's not like I totally forgot what it looked like, but my memory is never as vivid as reality spreading out around me. The sky is blue, what little plant life there is in IGPX City is green, and cars and pedestrians are from all ends of the color wheel and beyond. I don't even stop myself from grinning like a fucking moron.

"Are you sure you don't want me to drop you off at home?" Alexander asks for what's gotta be the twentieth time. I do my best to look at him and not the colored lights on his dashboard. The car adds just the slightest tint of shade over him, dropping his colors a few gradients darker. "It's startin' to warm up out there. Toting that thing back's gonna be a pain in the ass."

I shrug him off, brushing my fingers over the shaved side of my head. "I walked to your place carrying that picnic basket when it was full. Heading back after we've already eaten out of it will be easy." The stitching on the car seat catches my attention, the black looking darker with the almost shiny leather next to it. "Besides, you can load up some of the extra at your place. I swear you hardly ever cook."

"Racing practice kind of takes it out of me." Pulling to a stop at a red light (which I can see, not just guess because of the position), Alexander flicks on his turn signal and waits for traffic to pass. "Besides, don't you think it's a little unfair that we always use my place for home base?"

"Don't you think it's a little unfair that you're never awake when I stop by?" I ask, without a doubt trying to distract him. Alexander scowls, but the furrow eases out of his brow in short order. I'm tempted to toss in something like, Besides, I put in the effort to find your place, so you can do the same, but that might end in him asking probing questions about Mariya that I'm not allowed to answer. Sucks to be him.

Or, y'know, it would if he wasn't Cunningham freakin' Hume.

Alexander sighs as I recognize the buildings rolling past me in the windows. The old brick café on the corner (which is an awesome shade of russet red) is near his place. Considering his competitive streak, it's surprising he's given in so easy. "You're impossible, you know that?"

"Hey, it's because I'm impossible that you've started to feel better, right? I'll take it." Especially because it's helped me a feel a lot better, too. The world has never looked so amazing to me. I lean back in the comfiest seat in the damn world and grin. I never thought I'd say I'm glad I got caught during a stunt, but this is worth it. "Have you considered sky diving next? That's an adventure."

"Oh?" Alexander raises an eyebrow, not once taking his eyes off the road. What a goody two shoes. Then again, considering he's usually piloting a mech, maybe that vigilance is habit by now. "You weren't planning on just feeding me for the rest of the off season?"

I snort and whack his arm. "We'd run out of interesting places to eat without getting mobbed in no time. Besides, I wouldn't be able to make you any spider dishes. What fun is that?" Alexander shudders, and I switch gears to patting his shoulder. "There, there. If you ever get a damn week off in your life, we can go straight to Cambodia. Get it from the source."

"I don't think you'd be very happy if the person driving you around vomited in the process."

"I think you'd be less happy about it, considering that this is your car." We turn another corner onto Alexander's street, the neat rows of houses looking less identical now that I can distinguish them by their paint colors, all blue and brown and white. "Though I guess it would be kinda shitty if I had to endure the smell of your puke. Glad we're almost done here."

Alexander shakes his head, hair waving in the process. "Charming as always." It's unfair what a nice shade of brown his hair is. Much more appealing that the near-black color I'd seen before. The car slows as we pull into the drive and wait for the garage door to finish opening. Alexander parks with a precision I don't think I could manage. "Well, thanks again for the food. It was nice."

"You mean enjoying the track again was nice." I mean it as a snark, but Alexander's expression softens, melting back to that smile.

"Yeah, that was part of it."

Before he can get all mushy on me, I unbuckle my seatbelt and hop out of the car, ready to retrieve my picnic basket from the backseat. Before Alexander can even think to do the same, I toss the blanket at his head, submerging him in the darkest of greens. "You're not done with me yet, Alexander. I still gotta load off some of this food on you."

Alexander splutters until a warm laugh spills out of his mouth. I'm already halfway back into his house by the time the driver's side door opens. "If you leave it here do I have to pay the bill?" he asks as the garage rattles shut.

"Hm?" In color, Alexander's kitchen is rather plain, the dark blue walls accented with white cabinets. I put the basket on the table and snoop around, trying to uncover some Tupperware so I can split up the food without having to give up anything for my place.

"You know, you've been making me pay for everything else so far." Alexander opens a cabinet and reveals a line of plastic containers —on the opposite end of the room from where I was looking. I let the door in my hand bang shut and accept the Tupperware as he starts to unload it. "I figured that this wouldn't be much different."

A heaping pile of containers with their red and blue lids in my arms, I totter over to the table. "Well, yeah, but all those things were expensive. Like, a decent chunk of cash." Without any better method, I dump my whole load, listening to the sound of plastic knocking against plastic. "I threw this together for under forty bucks. That's pretty much chump change." Or at least it is at our financial status. I make a mental note to send some more money back to my family.

Looking over the mess I've made of his table with an amused smile, Alexander comes over with several spoons suited to scraping food between bowls. "Fair enough," he says and gets to helping me with the transfers. We'll have this taken care of in no time. "Any chance I can expect a similar discount in the future?"

"Not a chance." I grin, pointing my spoon at him so fast that I almost flick potato salad in his face. I'm almost sad that I didn't. "You're a big boy, Alexander. You can afford it."

He clicks his fingers in mock disappointment. "Worth a shot." I roll my eyes and pop the lid onto my chosen container and move onto the next. "Well, I'd guess I'd feel bad if I didn't chip in by this point since you're doing all this to help me. And you're right, I can afford it."

"See? So stop fussing." Sorting out the rest of the food, I pick up the container of watermelon and try to split it without spilling the juice all over the table. "For someone that was trying to get me arrested a month ago, you sure are acting considerate."

"Well, like I said, you helped me out a lot." The words make me smile. Even if Alexander doesn't know it, he's helped me out a lot, too. I'd almost forgotten what real watermelon looks like—vibrant pink, not just my cookie cutter imagination of red. "Then again, since you provided the food today, maybe I should repay the favor next time."

I let my smile widen into a grin. "What, you're gonna cook for me?"

Alexander passes me the half-empty sandwich container, the corners of his lips quirked up. "I don't think you'd like that very much."

"What, no Cunningham cuisine?" With the rest all the food divvied up, I doublecheck the basket one more time before flipping the lid shut and hopping up to sit next to it on the table. "What's this payback gonna be, then?"

"Let me take you out to dinner, Kirsten."


[Author's Notes]

Heyo, we're looking at another fresh update that's ready to roll! This was one of those chapters that surprised me when I wrote it, slipping in some bonus backstory before we roll forward into the next sort of movement. Hopefully this fic was as enjoyable to read as it is for me to write it!

Thanks go out to Mangakamary and Sj2Qz (Guest) for the reviews! I super appreciate the support! Do be sure to drop off a line next time, too, yeah?

We're almost at the end of my ten-year fanfiction anniversary celebration, but we're not done yet. Tomorrow will have one last update to another fic before we get back to our regular Saturday updates. But never fear, there will be more of this story to come in 2019. Please look forward to it!

-Avi

[01.03.2019]