Alive
By: Aviantei
15 mph
"Aw, man, look at him," Jan says, poking at Dew's side. He's completely slumped back in the booth, his head leaning backwards and mouth hanging wide open. He doesn't snore, but the sounds of his breathing are just loud enough that I can hear them from the other side of the table. Jan looks back to me and Alexander, all the alcohol flushing his cheeks red. "Should I wake him up?"
"Let the kiddo be," I say, trying to wave my hand through the air. I can't quite get the right level of coordination down, so it just kind of flops. I have no idea what time it is, but I doubt I'd be able to read a clock with how much beer I've gone through anyway. "If he's asleep, that just means he's a lightweight."
Alexander chuckles. I'd wondered if he'd be a bit more unrestrained with some beer in him, but he's just a mellow drunk. "You hold your beer better than I thought, though, Kirsten," he says, scanning over the bits of food still left on the table. Our server has been an absolute gem at helping us avoid alcohol poisoning. "I bet you had your fair share of wild adventures in you, huh?"
"Leave the past in the past, Alexander." Somehow, I manage to get the words out without slurring, which is impressive since I lost count of my number of drinks a long time ago. I tap my fingers along the edge of the table. "I grew out of that phase of my life a long time ago."
"Could've fooled me."
"That's just 'cause you're so boring, man," Jan says. He hasn't woken Dew up, but that hasn't stopped Jan from snapping a picture of his snoozing teammate. "Never did any parties or anything. It's unfair how much you can drink in one go. Frickin' Germans, it's in their blood or something."
"Isn't the drinking age, like, super low where you grew up, though?" I ask. I didn't start my world travels until I was done with high school, but I sorta kinda remember sneaking in some "underage" drinks while I was in Europe. Jan just brushes his hair out of his face, muttering something I can't quite hear. "Oh, I recognize that 'I've done shit that I regret' face. Spill. I won't tell."
Alexander sips from the glass of water out server so graciously provided and shakes his head. "Good luck getting that out of him," he says. "Jan will take his secrets to the grave." I smirk. Sounds like a challenge I'm willing take on. Alexander taps my shoulder. "Hey, will you lemme out? Restroom."
"Abandoning me when I could use some backup. So cruel!" I grasp my chest in mock hurt but stand up anyway. Alexander shuffles out of the seat and heads to the exit. For a moment, the chatter and louder music of the rest of the bar drift in, then fade out as Alex shuts the door behind him. I slump back into my seat. "Sheesh, that Alexander still doesn't know how to have fun."
"Is that it, then?" Jan asks. I glance over at him. His gaze is unfocused as he looks at me, but I have enough common sense left to recognize that he's trying to be serious. The beer isn't helping. "You're hanging out with him because you think he needs help with that? Nothin' else?"
For some reason, his words make me bristle. I narrow my eyes at Jan. Dew doesn't so much as stir at the change in atmosphere. "What, are you worried? Think I'm up to something?" I flick my ponytail over my shoulder, almost smacking myself in the face with it. "I'm not. But even if I was, it wouldn't be any of your business, would it? Alexander's an adult. He can make his own decisions about whether or not to trust me." He was stupid enough to agree to my dumb deal, after all.
Jan's brows furrow, and I lean back in my seat. "It's our business because we're his teammates. His friends." He puts so much emphasis on the word that my chest almost aches. After everything, Mariya's the only friend I have outside of my family, and it's damn pathetic. "You're not the first person that's tried to worm their way into his life. And just because you're taking him out to do things and not trying to be his girlfriend honestly doesn't mean shit to me." Ah, so that's it, then. Jan jabs a finger at me, though he ends up pointing at Alexander's empty spot beside me. "So you better have a good reason for this before I figure out how to make sure you never see him again."
The agitation and sadness inside me break as I laugh.
Jan isn't impressed. "What the hell's so funny?"
"Nothing. It's just kinda cute how you guys convinced Alexander to invite me to dinner just so you could try to protect him." Jan gives me a petulant look as I take a drink from my half full beer, trying to ignore how the lukewarm temperature twists its taste. "I know you don't have anything to take but my word for it, but you don't need to worry about me. Like I said, Alexander needed some fun in his life, so I figured I'd provide. And, well…"
I suck in a breath, watching the condensation along the side of my mug as I continue, "I was kind of worried about him, when it came to that stuff. But I haven't tried any of that shit. He hasn't, either. It's…nice. Having someone to just spend time with, no extra expectations or anything." Considering that Jan's acting like this, maybe I was stupid for doubting Alexander in the first place. "It's really nice. Seeing in color. I don't want to ruin that."
I didn't mean for some of that to come out, but Jan looks too confused to even catch it. Which is great, because I wouldn't even know where to start explaining it. Dew twitches a bit in his seat but doesn't awake. After Jan and I stare each other down for what seems like an eternity, he sighs and looks away.
"Alright," he says, seeming satisfied. "I don't know what you want, but I can tell it's at least nothing bad. So just keep doing what you're doing, Kirsten. It's…" He mulls over his words, casting his eyes at the door. "Cunningham sounds like he enjoys hanging out with you. So take care of that, dammit. That's all. Sorry for being an ass."
I don't realize I'm smiling for a moment. "No worries. Sorry for being some weirdo who just jumped into your friend's life." And his mech. I down the rest of my beer to keep that from spilling out, though it just seems counterproductive. With that done, I offer Jan my hand. "Truce?"
Jan misses my hand at first, but we manage to complete a clumsy handshake that tips over a glass of water. "Ah, damn," Jan says as Alexander opens the door, the pounding music following him.
Alexander raises an eyebrow as I attempt to salvage the remains of our potato skins with far too many napkins. "Do we need to wrap things up here?" he asks, sounding way too sober for my liking. Next time, I'll drink him under the damn table. "I know we don't have practice tomorrow, but…"
"Yeah, let's call it a night." Jan gives up on the food and shakes Dew's shoulder. "I'll take Dew home since we live the same way. You guys gonna be alright getting out of here safe?"
"We'll be fine," I say, standing up. I need the support of the table for a bit, but I should be able to walk just fine. This isn't close to being the worst bender I've ever gone on. I half-stumble over to Alexander's side. "You're paying for the cab, right? You said you'd cover everything."
Alexander rolls his eyes, but there's still a smile stretching over his lips. "Wait here. I'll go pay the tab."
Outside, the night air has just enough chill to it to make up for the obnoxious heat during the day. Despite it being late, cars still shine their headlights on the roads and the other bars on the strip all flash their neon signs. With my newly restored color vision, it's a damn mess, and I support myself on Alexander's arm as he hails a ride. Since anyone still awake at this hour is most likely plastered, no one makes a big deal out of him standing in the middle of the street.
"You doin' okay there?" Alexander asks as a cab pulls up for us. I force myself to stand up and crawl into the back seat without his help. It's almost a shame that he couldn't drive, because falling asleep in his car seat sounds fantastic. The cab feels like torture in comparison. Alexander piles in after me. "Here, let's stop by your place first so I can help you inside."
"Joke's on you, but your place is closer," I say. With the passenger door shut, it's hard to make out Alexander's expression in the dark. I think about telling the driver Alexander's address, but my memory is drawing a blank. Instead, I draw myself up to my full height, though it doesn't do much good when we're still sitting down. "I'll pay this taxi driver to go around in circles, and none of us would like that. So just go to your place first, kay?"
Alexander's sigh slips out in the dark, but he tells the driver his address, and off we go. With that done, he closes the partition between the front and back seats. "Is there a reason you're so against me knowing where you live? I already told you that I don't plan on getting you arrested."
I prop my legs against the seat in front of me and lean back, enjoying the way the lights of the city seem to roll past like stars. "Well, mostly 'cause it annoys you." At least, at this point. I leave out the part where some miniscule part of me doesn't trust what he'd do if he knew. And I had the gall to tell Mariya she was being silly. "Also because I don't see how it's relevant. You're friends with Takeshi Jin, but do you know where he lives?"
"No, but he doesn't come break into my house on a regular basis." Underneath his calm tone, I think I hear something else. Is he pouting? "I'm just saying, it just seems unfair, that's all. But if you're not gonna tell me, there's no sense in forcing the issue."
The faint unease that's made it through to my drunken mind disappears back into the haze of blocked neurotransmitters. I go to lean closer to him but overestimate my balance and end up almost jabbing my chin into his arm. "Such a gentleman. Maybe that's why you're bored all the time."
A square of orange light manages to make it through the window, illuminating Alexander's amused expression for an instant. "Are you telling me you'd rather I wasn't a gentleman, Kirsten?" I can feel the warmth of his breath, the smell of alcohol clinging to it. It reminds me far too much of all the dumb decisions I've made before in my life, but it's not the same. Alexander feels different, feels safe.
But for once in my life I'm not ready to take a chance. Not that chance.
The car slows to a stop, and I don't have to make that decision. Alexander's sleepy neighborhood waits outside, everyone in their neat rows of homes fast asleep already. Our driver knocks on the window, and Alexander opens it, handing over his card and explaining to charge my ride home on it, too. With that settled, he climbs out of the car and turns back to me. "See you soon?" he asks, as if we haven't been meeting like clockwork.
"See you soon," I say, then watch until he makes it inside the house before I tell the driver my address. It's not too long of a drive, and soon I'm back home, half remembering to change into my pajamas before I collapse on the bed. I'm so tired that it doesn't take long for me to fall asleep feeling absolutely fulfilled—
Until I wake up the next morning and the copies of the pictures that Dew has sent me are gray.
[Author's Notes]
Alright, folks, the time has come! I'm officially moving Alive into weekly update slots so we have half a chance of finishing this thing by the end of the year! That means there will be a new chapter guaranteed every Saturday, so I hope you enjoy.
Generally I try to reserve updating weekly for fics that I've drafted all the way through, but this case is an exception since it's moving towards the end, just not all the way through. Rest assured that I have plenty of content to tide over until I reach the end of my queue, and that I'm still working on drafting the rest of what's to come so I can make this the third completed story lined up for this year. Other updates for different fics will still apply.
That being said, we'll pick up from where we left off next Saturday. Please look forward to it!
-Avi
[08.12.2019]
