A/N: It's been awhile since I've written a chapter like this. It's kinda refreshing. But also nerve-wracking. Hopefully I haven't lost my touch.


Blocked Entry

Footsteps echoed through the halls of the testing facility. The clean click-clack of soles connecting with floor tiles had an almost whimsical ring.

The sound eventually slowed to a halt.

Approaching the club room, Misaka Mikoto noticed the Number 1 sitting nearby on the floor.

"…"

The white-haired boy pressed his clipboard against his knees as he scratched notes on it.

"Err, uh, what's going on?"

Without looking, he motioned to the door.

"…?"

Turning aside, she saw the sign.

Written in thick marker:

[ No RAILGUNS allowed. And also ACCELERATORS. ]

"…"

After reading it several times, she asked blankly.

"Is this a bit?"

"It's likely."

Blocked Entry II

Misaka Mikoto jiggled the handle to no avail. Naturally, the door was manually locked from the inside.

"…"

She puffed her cheeks.

And then she groaned.

"Uuugh. Fine. I'll bite."

( Accelerator: How admirable. )

The girl knocked and listlessly called out to the people inside.

"Oi, oi. Let me in."

And following up.

"Let me in. Or I'll burn this place to the ground."

A muffled voice answered in kind.

( Shizuri: Read the sign, dumbass. )

( Misaki: Yeah, dumbass! )

Misaka Mikoto felt her blood pressure rise.

Blocked Entry III

"Why don't you say that to my face?-!"

The Number 3 jiggled the handle once more, this time metallic sparks erupted from the frame's edge!

( Misaki: Gunha! )

As Misaka Mikoto pushed forward, resistance came in from behind!

"Gunha?-! Gunha?-! Is that you?-! Let me in, you bastaaaaard!"

She rammed herself against the door, jostling it against its hinges.

( Gunha: You're gonna need more GUTS if you wanna get past me! )

( Misaki: Too close… )

While pushing against the Number 7's strength, a white substance seeped out from beneath the entrance. Kakine Teitoku's head popped up from the pool of dark matter, and looking up, he spoke with an air of professionalism.

"I suppose you're entitled an explanation. You see, we, collectively, have decided that until the two of you-"

Immediately, Misaka Mikoto's foot slammed down on him.

"Where the hell do you think you're looking?-!"

Olive

( Teitoku: I'm not… looking anywhere. Just shorts. )

( Mikoto: Creep! Pervert! Bug! )

Kakine Teitoku continued to keep his form even with the Number 3 stomping on him.

"Can you- Can you please stop? I'm tryin- Hey now- This is uncomfortable-"

"ABSOLUTELY NOT!"

The girl got several more strikes in before the Number 1 interrupted. He slid his clipboard into the Number 2's mouth.

"Hff-! Hffaaah?"

"Think about it. I'd like to get home early today."

"…"

Despite Accelerator's unpleasantly clipped attitude...

Kakine Teitoku took his advice and sank back down, taking the clipboard with him.

"…Ah? Eh?"

Question marks appeared over the Number 3's head.

"What was that?"

"Negotiation terms. Or as adults like to call em', a bribe."

The door swung in and the Number 3 lost her footing.

Grievance

Finally inside the club room, the two outsiders were met with calculated animosity. A council of 5 sat opposite to the Number 1 and Number 3. From the way furniture was arranged, it was like they arrived for a job interview.

"Interesting, interesting…"

Shokuhou Misaki looked over the contents of the contract.

"You really know how to sway a woman's heart, but…"

She tossed the clipboard on the ground.

"In the end, I doubt you get why all of us are so angry in the first place! Don't think that our emotions can be quelled by such meager advances!"

( Mikoto: What was the trade? )

( Accelerator: I promised a mini-fridge if they stopped being annoying. )

( Gunha: Wait? We can have a fridge in here? That'd be awesome! )

( Teitoku: I also agree. Shokuhou-san, maybe you should reconsider your disposition? )

The Number 5 slammed her hands on the table in front of her.

"Shut it! Who cares about a fridge?-! What we really want is an apology! The two of will apologize for your crimes immediately!"

( Shizuri: That's too bad. I was hoping to have for another place to store my home baked goods. )

"FINE! WE'LL TAKE THE FRIDGE TOO!"

Grievance II

Misaka Mikoto half-raised her hand.

"I don't understand. Did I do something wrong… well, other than talk bad about you behind your back?"

( Misaki: That behavior is also another problem… )

The blonde sighed.

"Playing dumb now? You really think you can get away scot-free?"

( Mikoto: Again. I have no idea what you're talking about. )

"Don't think we haven't noticed it.

"That's right…

"The two of you, Accelerator and Railgun…

"Have been stealing all of our screen time!"

[ SFX: *SHOCK*]

"In a fanfic titled 'Super Seven', there's a clear uneven distribution of focus, don't you think?-! Why is our side being so neglected?-! That's strange! This is like naming a series after a character that barely makes any appearances! You just can't do false advertising like that!"

Holding her hand to her chest, Shokuhou Misaki preached.

"I believe that all of us (excluding the Number 2) should share equal amounts of time in the spotlight! Yes! That's how it should be! But you two… You two have been greedily taking over everyone's attention! Do you not realize the severity of your misconduct?-!

"You've heinously stole time that was rightfully ours!

"So apologize! Apologize to our audience! Apologize for wasting their time on insignificant backdoor drama! And give us that fridge in repentance!"

The girl confidently crossed her arms as everyone in the room gave a small applause.

Convenience Factor

After the applause subsided, Misaka Mikoto answered her demand with a smile.

"Aha ha! How about 'no'?"

"Oi!"

Kakine Teitoku stood up.

"When you say fridge, can you go into more detail? Brand? Size? Measurements?"

( Misaki: Don't get distracted, dang it! )

Accelerator answered lazily.

"Ehh… I was thinking something small… Lately, I've had to start staying here late , and carrying around canned coffee is a hassle… So maybe I'll just buy one anyway…"

Sogiita Gunha also stood up.

"If it's a really hot day and the A/C gets borked, can I stick my head in it?"

"Sure. No one's stopping you."

Mugino Shizuri stood up as well.

"Hypothetically speaking, if this 'fridge plan' came to fruition, would anyone mind if put something other than snacks or drinks inside? Like say, a body or plural bodies."

"If it fits, go for it."

Remorse

( Mikoto: Ah. Wait a sec. If this place gets a fridge, we need to set up some boundaries. I'd rather not use a fridge covered in Gunha's sweat and… whoever the Number 4 has in mind. )

( Shizuri: It was hypothetical. )

( Teitoku: What color should it be? Traditional white? Silver? )

Before the conversation could completely derail, Shokuhou Misaki raised her hands up.

"Okay! Everyone! Stop!

"I'm excited for fridge too, but can we rewind back, like, 30 seconds?-!"

Frazzled, the Number 5 pointed at Accelerator and Misaka Mikoto.

"I mean, how is it that you two can casually waltz in here and pretend like everything is fine?-!"

The Number 3 blinked.

"Because I still have no idea what you're talking about?"

"Likewise."

( Misaki: AAAAAAAAAAAHHHGH! )

Remorse II

"If all you want is an apology, then fine. I'd rather start this experiment sooner than later."

The Number 1 gave in to the Number 5's unreasonable request.

"Hah? If you're apologizing, that'll make me look bad in comparison! Ugh, whatever…"

Even though she was disgruntled, the Number 3 begrudgingly followed his example.

( Misaki: Things are going my way, and yet I'm still pissed off. )

The Number 3 cleared her throat.

"I'll start first."

Stepping forward…

Misaka Mikoto stuck her tongue out and made a cutesy pose.

"Tehe~! My bad~!"

( Misaki: Please take this more seriously. )

Stepping forward…

Accelerator stared blankly while loading bullets into into his service pistol.

"Tehe. My bad."

( Misaki: Scary! Why are you apologizing while loading a weapon?-! )

( Accelerator: It helps me destress. )

Remorse III

The apology continued.

Misaka Mikoto bowed down.

"I'm sorry for being cute and popular and thus a good character to focus on."

Accelerator bowed down.

"I'm sorry for being interesting and complex and fun to write about."

Misaka Mikoto bowed down.

"I'm sorry that my spin-off has incredibly cool stuff going on in it."

Accelerator bowed down.

"I'm sorry that I got two spin-offs. The latter of which is a surprisingly hilarious comedy."

Misaka Mikoto bowed down.

"I'm sorry that you got shafted from being the star of your own spin-off."

Accelerator bowed down.

"I'm sorry Kamachi realized that having a background friend character with minimal lines would be a more interesting main character than you."

Misaka Mikoto and Accelerator both bowed down.

"We're sorry." (x2)

( Misaki: YOU'RE NOT SORRY AT ALLLLLL! )


Next Chapter: Two Level 5s take a look at refrigerators.


Extra: Bench Kids

In a sudden throwback…

Fremea Seivelun and Last Order were sitting on a bench.

"'Let's talk about parallel universes!' says Misaka as Misaka vigorously pumps her arms up into the air!"

"'Huh? What? Why?"

Last Order stroked her chin.

"'Well, haven't you ever thought about realities similar to ours but only slightly different?' asks Misaka as Misaka makes a thoughtful pose."

"You mean like… a parallel universe where everybody is vaguely aware of their own made-up existence as comedic depictions of somebody else's fictional work? Essentially, I can't say that I have."

"That's no fun!"

The two girls stared off.

The crying of cicadas overwhelmed.

"Ah. I guess, he isn't coming today either."