Boilerplate Disclaimer: The various characters from Zootopia are all owned by Disney the great and powerful. Any and all registered trade names property of their respective owners. Cheap shots at celebrities constitute fair usage.

When a knock came on the door,
And there stood old Smokey Joe.

Kickin' the Gong Around

Nick and Judy waited nervously for the call from the Forensics Lab the next day. Judy spent her time in a fruitless effort to gather information on the two lynxes for whom they had failed to gather any current information. Nick made calls to verify the five alibis they had been given, with promises they were iron-clad, actually checked out. At least superficially they did.

A little after one the call came from Forensics.

"Yes?" Judy asked, excited by the call. "What did you find?"

"The three animals who voluntarily provided samples?"

"Yes?"

"No evidence any of them are connected with any criminal activity."

"And the two we brought in the coffee cups for? What about them?"

"We sent results on one of them to the Second. DNA was associated with a grand theft, auto, case. Neither DNA profile matched your killer."

"Thanks," Judy told the rat. She hung up and sighed. "Three or five possible suspects?"

"Think we've narrowed it enough for Alces to give us more time?" asked Nick.

"I don't know. Alces might be impressed, but he knows that we may have hit a dead end. A judge won't issue an order to force DNA tests for multiple suspects when there's no actual evidence linking any of them to a crime."

"So, we need to narrow the list more?"

"Yep. The three we have addresses for?"

"What about them?"

"Call Department of Sanitation. Find when their garbage is picked up."

That evening, as they sat in an unmarked police car, Nick asked, "And this is legal?"

"How did you get through the Police Academy?"

"You don't need the highest grade in a class to pass the Academy. Unlike some animals I could name, I am not an over-achiever."

"Are you suggesting there is something wrong with that?"

"Not at all. Husbands need to know their place. We're always wrong. If I had the best scores in my class I might be tempted to argue with you. Now I know just to say, 'Yes, Dear'. But if you could, remind me on why this isn't entrapment?"

"Courts say once you put your garbage out on the curb the police don't need a court order to go through it."

"The courts pay any attention of the dignity of the poor police officers, forced to rummage around in garbage for evidence?"

"Nope."

Judy kept watch. Nick played solitaire on his phone. Eventually she nudged him. "He's bringing out the trash."

"Okay, so we–"

"No, 'We' Mister Wilde. I've been on duty. You've been on break. You go grab the evidence. You don't your wife digging around in garbage do you?"

They left the bag of garbage at the lab and headed home.

Judy had to give testimony in court the next day for a crime a month earlier. Nick went out alone to shadow one of the two remaining suspects they could locate. As the fox had suspected, the request for an alibi or DNA had alerted the lynx that he was under suspicion. Nick wasn't sure if the animal had spotted him doing surveillance or was simply being careful.

He was far enough from the lynx his phone might not have been heard, but the phone was on vibrate. Caller ID showed the First.

"Yes?"

"Nick? Ben here."

"Judy okay?"

"Far as I know. Calling to give you a head's up."

"What's happening?"

"That old weasel, the one at the retirement home?"

"Duke's grandmother."

"She called again."

"You didn't tell Alces, did you?"

"No, but you know I'm supposed to log all incoming calls. I could get in trouble."

Nick sighed, "I'll go out and talk with her tonight. I promise."

"Thanks, Nick."

"Don't suppose the Forensics Lab called for Judy or me."

"Sorry. Expecting a call?"

"Not this fast – but I could hope. If they have it by tonight it counts as small miracle."

"So would a big miracle if they'd called already?"

"Hope doesn't cost anything. No harm in wanting a big one."

"I'll let you know if you get one."

Late in the morning Duke's bail was set.

Nick felt it had been set excessively high and called Judy on what he assumed was a lunch break to complain. "Why set it that high for an innocent animal?"

"Because they don't know he's not the killer," she reminded him. "That's what they'd require for any animal arrested for three murders."

In the afternoon, after testifying at the trial, Judy joined Nick. The rabbit had been nervous, unsure if what the courts might think of any evidence Nick might have collected without her. The testimony of two detectives would carry more weight.

"Maybe we should try the other lynx," suggested Nick. "He's so careful... He comes out for a cigarette break every ninety minutes or so, and pockets the butts and takes them back inside with him."

"That can't be his habit," argued Judy. "Force of habit will kick in, he'll get careless and we'll have something for the lab."

The lynx was careful for the rest of the day. If there was more evidence for that specific lynx the department would have assigned another pair of detectives to continue watching. Judy and Nick were on their own. They were putting in extra hours this week, but got nothing on this potential suspect.

"Where are you going," Judy asked as they quit for the day and Nick drove in an unexpected direction.

"Duke's grandmother called the station again."

"Ouch."

"Ben said he'd try to keep it off the record, but it's not fair to him. I'm hoping I can threaten the old gal and make her stop."

"It seems to me that telling her you can get in trouble if she keeps calling will only encourage her to keep calling."

"Ah, but I say I'm willing to help Duke when I can, if she'll stop calling. She keeps calling and I ignore Duke. There's the threat."

Judy snorted, "Empty threat. You want Duke out... I can't believe I'm saying this, but I want Duke out. He shouldn't be behind bars for a crime he didn't commit. Now, if he gets picked up for one of his illegal activities, that's different."

"But of course his grandmother doesn't know it's an empty threat. I'd suggest we play good cop – bad cop with her... You make a lousy bad cop."

"Hard for a rabbit," agreed Judy. "Everyone believes you pred types are bad."

"Stereotyping!" Nick said in accusatory tone.

"And you saying rabbits are lousy as the bad cop isn't?"

Nick laughed, "How about we do the concerned police officers who want to do their duty, but she's interfering?"

They managed to extract a promise to not call the station for at least a week, but in return she demanded they meet with the lawyer she had arranged for Duke.

"Alces won't like that," Judy commented as they left.

"True, but we make sure we do it on our time. And if we can show this lynx is a killer he'll give us a lot of slack on helping Duke."

"You seem awfully sure this lynx is the killer. We have two names on our list we can't even get any information on."

"Call it canine intuition."

"I'll call it hopeless optimism."

"I can't believe you would accuse anyone else of being overly optimistic, Ms Rebecca of Bunnyburrow Farms – where the sun always shines and the air smells of roses."

"It could be one of the two we're got nothing on. We can't even be sure the killer was on that original list of twenty-eight!"

"Yes, but I happen to know the rabbit who compiled the list is very efficient. And if Fox-male and Rabbit found nothing on the Fox Computer about those last two it means they've moved out of the city, or died or something. I mean, some of those records you went through were old."


It was their last day Alces had given them to narrow the list of suspects. Judy felt certain that four vague suspects, with no hard evidence any of the four was the killer, meant they'd be removed from the case on Monday. Nick thought they had made incredible progress and felt he could persuade Alces for at least another week to work the potential suspects that remained.

It was, once again, a day where they obtained no evidence. Every cigarette butt, any lunch wrapper was carefully kept by the lynx. "He knows we're watching," represented Nick opinion.

End of the work day. The lynx left, smoking a cigarette and talking with a wolf. He paused to grind out the butt, picked it up and pocketed it, and headed for the parking lot.

Judy jumped from the car, drawing a small plastic evidence bag from her pocket as she headed for the spot where the butt had been extinguished.

Nick wondered what Judy had seen. What he saw was the lynx noticing Judy from the corner of his eye and turning around to go after the rabbit. Nick was out of the car and running to protect Judy. The wolf who had been walking with the lynx just stood, puzzled and wondering what was going on.

As Judy stooped at the spot where the cigarette had been ground out the lynx was almost on her. The fox made a flying tackle and knocked the feline to one side. But the lynx was bigger than Nick, a slash of his claws knocked the fox back, shredding Nick's clothing.

The lynx turned at Judy, but the rabbit was ready. Another swipe of claws, but Judy grabbed his arm and threw him. The feline landed heavily and both Nick and Judy jumped on top of him.

The wolf had come back, not sure what was happening and wondering if he should aid his co-worker.

"Police officers," Judy called. "Nick, cuff him!"

Once the lynx was subdued Judy read the animal his rights and called for him to be picked up. As he was loaded into the black mariah Judy smiled at him, "Assault on police officers. It's a felony offense."

They headed back to their vehicle. Nick assessed the damage to his suit. It could not be saved.

"Are you hurt?" Judy asked, the worry clear in her voice.

"The suit's ruined."

"I don't care, it's not important."

"I liked this suit."

"You, you're important! If you got hurt trying – I was ready for him."

"I didn't know that. And I happen to love you. I'm fine, but I have one question. What did you see? What did he drop?"

"He didn't drop anything."

"Then why was he trying... He didn't know you hadn't seen anything."

"I've been hanging around with a fox for too long. I'm afraid I'm losing all my moral values. I tricked the poor lynx."

"You're just lucky the fox was there to save your fluffy little tail," Nick told her. "And you might have considered warning him what you were going to do."

"It just came to me, I had to act fast."

"Attack on police officer, felony offense, mandatory DNA test."

"And your canine intuition said he's the murderer... The fact he attacked us suggests he might be."

"And you said you lost all your moral values hanging around with me? Maybe this is the weekend to test out your offer to do anything for me."


The pair met with Duke's defense lawyer over the weekend. They were not impressed. It was not that he seemed incompetent. Judy's opinion was, "Crooked. Which you would expect when Duke's grandmother hired him."

"There's an old song where a lawyer boasts, 'All thieves who could my fees afford relied on my orations, and many a burglar I've restored to his friends and his relations.' It's lawyers like that who give weasels a bad name."

"Uh, Nick? Do you need your eyes checked. He was an armadillo, not a weasel."

"Doesn't matter. A lawyer that slimy still gives weasels a bad name. Everything gives weasels a bad name. They've got it worse than foxes."

"True. Maybe Ernie can change public perception."

"If any weasel can change public opinion it would be Ernie. Ernie and Gina make a nice couple, very photogenic."

"Almost as nice as Ernie and Iris."

"But no Ernie and Cheryl, right?"

"Certainly not, Mister Wilde. Zootopia is not ready for interspecies romance."