Ch 14

Ben

I fell to dark ground below me, shocked at what had just happened.

I had just seen the memory of Rey and the first time our hands touched. It was the first time I'd had any physical contact with anyone willingly besides my parents. It wasn't a punishment and it wasn't forced. She had willingly reached out to me and I reciprocated.

And that was when everything around me froze.

The moment our hands touched I sensed it, the connection. It had opened again after what felt like ages. I could feel her all around me like an ocean breeze. So clear and refreshing.

Ben.... I heard her say, her voice bringing the calm after the storm.

Rey... I called out to her. I wanted to find her and hold her and kiss her...

Where are you? Please don't leave...She begged. There was a hint of... panic in her voice. I couldn't understand why.

Rey... I love y- and that's when it closed.

It shot me back into the darkness and I was left dazed and confused.

I lay there on the ground for a while, I wasn't sure what to do or what to think.

My grandmother came back and sat next to me.

"I sensed it too, no one else can be a part of your dyad, but, we can all feel it. Those of us that are one with the Force, and the Force sensitives. It's like a sun pulling all the planets with gravity. That's how you can get back to her, through your connection. You're so close Ben" she said and stroked the side of my face.

I sat up and hung my head, there was still something that bothered me.

"Grandmother... why me and her? I've committed so many wrongs, some so unforgivable, why would she ever pick me again?"

She sat on the ground and grew quiet for a minute, her mind obviously pensive.

"Well I don't know the answer to why. I know your grandfather often asks himself the same questions about us, our family. But there's one thing I've learned, the Force works in mysterious ways. I think you and her keep each other balanced. Your grandfather was born from the Force, from the light. And she comes from a dark lineage from her grandfather's side. That doesn't mean she's all dark and it doesn't mean you're all light, she brought the good in you and you made her feel comfortable in her darkness. You've both brought balance and you need each other. You have a greater purpose, but you have to be willing to forgive yourself and let the past go. If not you'll make the same mistakes and lose her. Is that what you want?" She was facing me and her voice nurturing yet firm. There was a political charm in everything she said. There was compassion in her words but there was unwavering strength behind them too.

"I don't want that... if I have another chance to be with her, I'll do anything to keep her by my side. I know she's my balance and I'm hers, I'm just not sure she'd forgive me if I do come back somehow"

She nodded, her face remained stoic, but her eyes betrayed her. There was worry there.

"I understand, but she has her own journey where she's at. She needs to be ready for the next step. If one of you isn't ready, you won't be able to go back when the time comes"

I nodded understandingly, she got up and motioned for me to follow her.

In the distance I could see light, but it was different, it wasn't like a concentrated area, it seemed to span across the infinite darkness.

Suddenly there was a field in front of us. Far more beautiful than any I'd ever seen across the galaxy.

The grass was green, and the trees were tall and there was flowers every where. Lilies from Naboo, blue blossoms, Hydra flowers...

in the distance I could see a large lake, the water was the deepest shade of blue I had ever seen.

"What is this place?" I asked in awe, it was so breathtaking that I was overwhelmed.

"It's the in between Ben... that's where you are. It's a place of rest for now, you need to take some time to really forgive yourself. To let everything go, it isn't just Rey you've hurt, there are others. And there's those who have hurt you..." she said.

I looked at her, her clothes had changed. She had on a blue gown with gold embroidery. Her hair was loose, her curls cascading down to her hips. There were white flowers in her hair, a necklace with a little wooden carving hung around her neck. She took off the necklace and stared at it for a while.

"This was carved by Anakin when he was a boy, he gave it to me so I could always remember him and have a piece of him with me. I treasured it above any other piece if jewelry I ever owned. It represented our love" she held it out for me to take "and now I give it to you. When the time comes, give it to her."

"Grandmother I couldn't-"

"Yes, you can" she said with a stubborn smile. I grinned back at her and took it, admiring the work and heart that radiated from the little wooden chip.

"She'll love it son, just as I love my angel" said a voice behind me. I turned around and saw my grandfather in his black Jedi robes. He walked towards my grandmother and wrapped his arm around her, his eyes never leaving her face.

His love was obvious, it was intoxicating.

"How will I know when I should give this to her?"

"You'll know..." she said.

They turned around and walked hand in hand towards the thickets of bushes.

I held the small trinket in my hands, letting the emotions and memories it once held envelop my mind.